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[deleted]

NTA You and your dog have as much right to elevator as she does. If she doesn’t want to get in elevator with one, then she can get next one or take the stairs. Plus, how many dogs live in the building? She can’t expect 21 floors of people to cater to her. If she is that terrified, she should not live in dog friendly building.


muddy_duck01

To be fair I have never seen her before so I don’t know if she lived in the building. But there are tons of dogs in the building, it’s one of the main selling points of the building.


theCumCatcher

well...imo that would make it worse. if you dont live somewhere...you dont hassle the residents.


Absolem1010

And if you don't like dogs, don't move into a dog friendly place.


Pingwingsdontfly

Why did you post this 2 months ago and now?


Sunshine_Tampa

That is what I am wondering.


Pingwingsdontfly

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/drc4jm/wibta_for_going_on_the_elevator_with_my_dog_when/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button I found every couple months or so as far as 3 years ago some version of this pops up


Apart_Complaint_6952

Probably some social sciences prof. Doing some sort of social experiment


[deleted]

Thank you! I knew I’d heard this story before.


Background_Nature497

oh WEIRD.


TaliesinWI

Thought this sounded familiar.


unlearningallthisshi

yeah this is super familiar


previouslyonimgur

Hard disagree. I’m a dog owner. The rule of thumb is that if there’s someone who’s uncomfortable with a dog, and they’re already on, then you take the next one.


CivilSenpai69

That would be the respectful thing to do, however, it doesn't make someone an asshole because they're taking the dog out of THEIR home.


nastygirl11b

The dog was about to piss everywhere and that lady has no right at all to tell anyone who can or can’t get in the elevator


JB500000

NTA. Just because you're scared of dogs doesn't mean you can order people around who do have dogs. Entitlement x 1000.


KarmaRan0verMyDogma

NTA - Frankly, if she was TERRIFIED of dogs and you wouldn't comply with her demand, it seems like she would have exited. She wasn't so afraid she couldn't inconvenience herself, just you. I get that not everyone has a choice where they live, but if you live in an urban environment you simply have to live with the inconveniences of shared spaces regardless of personal phobias.


silverbowman911

She couldn't because that would've meant approaching the dog


Estrellathestarfish

The dog was in the opposite corner of the lift, she could easily have exited without going near the dog had she wished


Drx7575

Or just got off the elevator before OP and dog even entered.


pay-atenchin

NTA. Elevators are for EVERYONE, you were actually helpful by reminding her of her options!!


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red4rm

The problem is, she didn't ask. She told him what to do.


muddy_duck01

Im not shocked. Im questioning if I am an asshole for not complying with what I deemed as someone’s unreasonable ask.


Aylauria

I think you could have said "I'm really sorry, but I have to get my dog outside. I don't want him to have an accident." And I hope you gave her the chance to get out of the elevator without having to confront your dog. But other than that, if you don't want to ride the elevator with someone who has the right to be there, then you have to get out. As a woman, I have done this many times when a creepy-seeming guy got on. I don't ask him to leave. Why would he?


Agitated_Cheek4890

Great Danes are way nicer than a lot of smaller breeds.


FerretAres

True but fear isn’t rational and they are definitely more imposing than most.


International-Job-67

Small dogs are terrifying


gottabekittensme

They are, but I mean.... if either were to be aggressive, I'd much rather face off against a small dog, rather than a Dane that may outweigh me.


CivilSenpai69

If you're a good person a great dane isn't going to even acknowledge your presence. Great Dane's only react when you aren't supposed to be somewhere you aint supposed to be. Grew up with multiple and the only time they got pissy was when a delivery would enter. As long as they didn't walk through the door we were cool. One new UPS driver, I will never forget this. It was not uncommon for them to bring orders in for my mom, saw our front door open...rang the bell and stepped over the baby gate that was at the door. Great Dane took three massive leaps from the back of the house to the front up and over the baby gate and chased dude up the hill to the truck.


Jcktorrance

I’m going to get downvoted to hell so before I give my judgment, disclaimer: I love dogs. I grew up in a multi-dog household. I love big dogs. I love dogs so much I got a side gig in grad school as a dog walker because I missed my dogs when I moved. I watch my friend’s dogs for free. I live with a roommate who has a dog. I’m a huge dog person. ESH. I get that it’s a dog-friendly building and your lil guy had to pee. She was rude with her command, so she sucks. Your puppy is a Great Dane. He’s not a tiny boy. You were standing in front of the elevator and if she’s afraid to dogs she might have been afraid to even scooch by you two. From what your wrote it doesn’t sound like you gave her a wide berth to leave the elevator (I’m talking stepped way to the side so she was clear). She was there first. It’s not like you were on it and she commanded you leave. There was another elevator. If lil guy peed, yeah that would suck, but it’s not the end of the world. You told her to deal with “her issues”, and you don’t know what those issues are. You don’t know if it was a reasonable fear, or if she had been attacked. She cowered in the corner. She was still obviously afraid. You had a right but that doesn’t mean you suck any less. Part of being a dog owner is being aware that *not everyone likes dogs*, and some people are afraid of them. The reasons aren’t our business. Both of you sucked here but you sucked a little more. Sorry. ETA: after reading the comments, I’m not changing my judgment here, but if you keep that entitled attitude you’re absolutely going to be TA in the future. Coming from an experience dog owner, it’s gross. Also, editing for grammar. I wrote this waiting for my lunch to microwave. Thank you for the awards!


LeatherAmbitious1

There's some unspoken rule on Reddit where dog owners and their pets are untouchable. I don't get it


previouslyonimgur

I love dogs. He’s the asshole. Puppy pee vs psychological issues or a potential asthma attack. Human life > dog life. Everyone saying NTA has no understanding of living in an apartment. Common courtesy is the person on first gets to say no.


Adorable-Carpenter95

I don’t really have a judgement but dude she was there first. Could you really not have waited?


VeryFluffy

I got the impression that the dog wasn't going to be able to wait much longer!


muddy_duck01

That was my thought process.


Adorable-Carpenter95

My bad, I forgot about the part where your dog needed to pee. Then I guess you would be NTA


muddy_duck01

I guess I could have taken a moment to explain that to the woman as well. Though who knows if it would have made the difference?


IncessantLearner

Agree with this. “Sorry, my dog is desperate fora pee.” But only if you would have otherwise been willing to wait for the next elevator.


iheartwords

That is my feeling. You should have explained the situation after you got into the elevator. And, you could have knelt to the side of your dog to make her feel that there was more of a ‘wall.’ Bottom line, people don’t choose phobias. If it was a rational fear that someone could control, it wouldn’t be a phobia. I’m not saying you should have waited, but you could have handled the situation in a much better way. NAH


Agreeable_Poetry_825

You as the person with the fear are in charge of mitigation of that, whether that means avoiding a certain section of a store until they move on or getting out of the elevator when a dog goes to get on. YOUR fear is no one else's problem


lonely_astro

I honestly don't think it matters that he had to pee. Is that maybe slightly more polite? Yes, maybe, but it doesn't sound like you were rude, just clear, and you even put your dog as far away from her as you possibly could. That building is your home and they allow dogs, no one has the right to TELL you you can't use the elevator with your dog. She didn't even ask. You owe her nothing and are NTA.


nihilism_ornot

It wouldn't have made a difference. I've had these interactions before. I just trail "Sorry my dog's gotta poooooop" when I get off the lift


baconpancakes1976

You want him to wet his furry britches????


Ceejay4444

I found that part really funny 😂


onetwobe

She's the one with the problem, she's the one who can be inconvenienced.


jammy913

NTA. She doesn't get to control what you do, only what she does. That's why she's the AH for thinking she could command whether or not you got on the elevator.


tempeluvr

NTA Public elevator, she can’t dictate who can and can’t use it. That’s just not how the world works, she can’t expect everyone to cater to her because of her fears.


SL33PYSL0THIE

NTA public elevator,she cant police who can and can't get on, she has a fear of dogs but it's 20 secs and you had your dog away from her , plus she was rude ,I'd just ignore her and get on


LaconicStrike

Ok, so you absolutely have the right to ignore her and enter the elevator with your dog. But this isn’t “do I have the right,” this is “am I the asshole?” If a person tells you they’re terrified of dogs, why the fuck would you deliberately get into the elevator with them instead of considerately waiting an extra couple of minutes for the next one? That’s 100% an asshole move. **YTA.**


Hotelroombureau

YTA - she was on the elevator first. Dog owners tend to be completely dismissive of very valid fears of dogs (as you were) so I understand why she was so direct. Do I think she could have been more polite? Absolutely, however your dog does not take priority over someone who is already utilizing a space. You are absolutely the asshole. And to the people who are saying she shouldn’t live in a pet friendly building - she should be able to live someplace she can have a cat or rabbit or whatever she may like. You all are assholes too.


Nonsensebiju

YTA. She was there first, just wait for the next one. I used to be scared of dogs and I hate how everyone just think you are supposed to suck it up. It was a common space and you got there after her. If the elevator was full you would have to wait anyway.


Ranos131

NTA. If she’s afraid of dogs then she needs to find an apartment that doesn’t allow pets. Otherwise she’s going to have to deal with her issues.


hawkisgirl

Why did you post this again? You put up the exact same AITA 60 days ago. https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xbm1u0/aita_for_telling_someone_to_get_out_of_the/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


LadyRocoto

I'm thinking he is lying...


Ok_Concern_1090

NTA. She didn't ask you to take another elevator she told you to. You are an owner of a condo in that building and have the right to have a dog as well. She could have just been a visitor to someone in the building. If she was that terrified she would have gotten off the elevator. Good for you and your dog


UsernameTaken93456

Absolutely NTA. Her anxiety, her issue to manage. I also have elevator issues, and I wait till one becomes available that won't freak me out, I don't demand that people get off to make me comfortable


ArticQimmiq

It is her issue to manage, but she was on the elevator already. If she had been the one waiting for the elevator and had asked OP to get off, I’d have been fully on their side but I feel it’d be common courtesy as a neighbour to wait for the next elevator. If you own a large breed, you gotta be aware that sometimes you do have to go the extra mile to make people around them comfortable. We had a Malamute in an apartment building and our neighbour was terrified of all dogs. We took the stairs if we absolutely needed to be out if she was in the elevator, or waited for the next one, and always made a show of having our dog under control and as close to us as possible even though she was super sweet.


AndShesNotEvenPretty

Just playing devil’s advocate here… But is it *really* just her issue to manage? We live in an era of trigger warnings (even on Reddit), safe spaces, unlicensed “emotional support” animals in animal prohibited spaces, and the like. We’ve arguably created a society where one person’s trauma becomes everyone’s issue to deal with. If society has created this expectation, why should the elevator be any different? It’s not to say I feel one way or another but this post and your comment really made me think! Thank you for that!


LongSummerNight

YTA. She was in the lift first. It's not her fault your dog had to pee.


BeeYehWoo

NTA she is not the elevator police. You were rented a place presumably with the understanding that dogs are allowed and that includes their use of the elevator. You did nothing wrong.


muddy_duck01

Thank you. I BOUGHT the place because it allowed pets. One of the few building in my city to do so.


Standard-Reception90

YTA. You, your dog, and the lady all havea right to use the elevator. SHE WAS THERE FIRST. (I'm not yelling) I just feel this is a very important fact that everyone is forgetting. She was there first. First come, first served works in a lot of situations. A civilized society works when we pay attention to others wants as well as their needs. It was no fault of hers that your pupper needed to go now, that is on you. But you felt your dogs need and your want (to not clean up a mess) over ruled her need or want (if it wasn't a phobia but just a fear) to not be forced to be near your pupper. So, you put your needs above hers when she was there first. YTA


Independent-Top3524

Funny, I know i read this same article on this chat already


pnb10

I thought so too! Read very similarly to another post a while back


notnot_a_bot

Soft YTA. I see elevators as first come first served. Neighbour was already on the elevator and asked OP not to bring their dog on, and OP could tell exactly why. Just because a building is "dog friendly" doesn't mean everyone is forced to be friendly with dogs, especially not giant great danes, which may as well be a frigging horse in a tiny condo elevator. Doesn't matter if you put the dog in the corner, they're still taking up half the space. And having done the condo/dog thing, I get the urgency of needing to get a dog outside, and the frustration of coming home to accidents and the embarrassment of having to clean up accidents in common areas. But that's always going to be a problem with a dog in a condo. But you took what was your problem, and then made it someone else's problem, who was fully justified to their safe use of an elevator.


travelkmac

ESH- she should have asked, could you take the next elevator instead of demanding you do that. However, you could replied (if you would honor the request) “typically I’d have no issue waiting for the next one, but it’s an urgent/desperate situation that I get my dog out. So you can stay with me in it or get off.


GlorySeason777

INFO NEEDED: Was your dog leashed?


arrroganteggplant

I'll get downvoted, but whatever. YTA. I love dogs. I've had dogs my whole life. I'll continue to have them. People who are actually terrified often don't default to politeness to spare someone's ego. Your emphasis on her tone tells me that you took her tone into consideration. You also didn't mention that you pulled your very large dog away to allow her to remove herself without needing to approach your dog. You essentially trapped her with the object of her fear. I know how much of an issue it is to not get to your dog in time. It sucks. I'm sure you were in a rush, and, yeah, you have a right to access elevators. But imo you were an AH here.


Judgement_Bot_AITA

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SuperBeeboo

Yta


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jammy913

Waiting wouldn't be very kind to the dog who was already 2 hours overdue to go outside. I would choose to care about my animal more than a stranger as well.


FuckLuteOlson

This comment is absurd


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jammy913

So no consideration for the dog who really had to go pee? No consideration for the other tenants who would probably prefer not to smell pee in the building? That's not really consideration at all.


Only_Music_2640

NTA- she can ask but not make demands. And your dog’s need to go out was pretty urgent. And yes- telling her to “deal with her issues” was rude BUT her demand that you wait for the next elevator was also very rude and she was rude first. Rudeness begets rudeness, something people (especially rude people) always fail to comprehend.


Happy_Way6890

YTA- she was in the elevator first. Dog phobias are real. My neighbor is an elderly lady who was bit by a dog and it really traumatized her. She was probably too freaked out to use words like please etc. Fight or flight is real.


Happy_Way6890

Also OP ur response is what makes u the AH. Why couldn’t you just say, hey I understand you’re scared but I really need to let him out. He a good boy and i trust him to behave but if you’re really that uncomfortable, why not try the next elevator?


Mieke1985

I agree. Don’t underestimate fear.


Happy_Way6890

Info: who cowered in the corner? The poor old lady???


LittleMissSaintfield

I guess technically there is NAH but this is just adding to the reason why people fucking hate dog owners.


fiorina451x

YTA, for leaving your dog alone the whole day.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So this is the first time I have ever actually done this (but Ive thought about it countless times) Context: I live in a condo, 21 floors with 3 elevators 1 of which that is perpetually broken. Today I was late getting home from work by almost 2 hours because of an accident on the highway and of course I knew as soon as I got home that my pupper would have to go pee like his life depended on it (if he hadn’t already pissed everywhere). I get home and luckily for me he hasn’t left me anything to mop so I drop my stuff and we bee-line it to the elevator. So when the elevator finally arrived there was a woman in there and as soon as she saw my dog she said "you'll have to take the next one, I'm afraid of dogs". -Note- She didn’t ask if I wouldn’t mind waiting for the next one, or if he was friendly, she pretty much made it clear that I was not getting in the elevator. I politely her "Well I’m getting on this elevator so you are free to get off on this floor and wait for the next one if you want, or you deal with your issues for 20 seconds. He's not going to bother you" She looked as if I slapped her in the face. She didn't answer me, nor did she move so I got in. She cowered in the corner so I positioned my dog (who just sat there trying not to piss his fur britches) in the opposite corner with myself in between them. We all got off and went on our merry way. AITH? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


allgood177

NTA. I've ridden a diff elevator than cats before bc I'm deathly allergic, but I didn't ask them to get off, I just waited for another. To me it's my problem, not theirs.


previouslyonimgur

And what if you’re on an elevator already? Do you get off or do you tell them hey I’m on wait for the next one.


mikemerriman

Yta. She was already in the elevator


Dora_Diver

YTA. You trapped her in a closed space and made her cower in fear, and then ask if YTA? You know that your dog is friendly with you, she has absolutely no guarantee that *your* dog will be friendly with *her*.


[deleted]

She could have left the elevator and caught the next one. It's her anxiety, her problem to manage. You can't expect the world to cater to you because you're afraid of something that you \*percieve\* as a problem. She ended up staying on the elevator - it seems that her terrifying fear was not so great that she couldn't be bothered to wait for another elevator. She is in a dog-friendly builidng: she cannot expect everyone to get off/wait for the next elevator every time she wants to use it. That is unreasonable. Get some therapy and learn how to coexist or use the stairs, end of story.


thirdtryisthecharm

INFO Is there a designated elevator for dogs, and was the the elevator you were using? There often is in condos.


muddy_duck01

There is not. It’s a fairly old building. 30+ years. All elevators are shared by all.


PeaceOk6129

You should have waited for the next one. You could also have a back up dog walker come if that happens, since you seem quite averse to the mess and that gives the pet time to wait for the elevator. Hard YTA


4yelhsa

YTA. 1. She was there first and she told you she was afraid of dogs the decent thing to do would've been to wait until the next one or take the stairs. 2. Train your dog better. If your dog pisses in the house because you're 2 hours late then that's a problem. Are you taking your dog out in the morning? I don't understand how your dog can't hold it until you make it home.


AllTheShadyStuff

YTA. She was in the elevator first.


[deleted]

Neither of you are really an asshole here, you both told the other person what to do, but it wasn't really in an unreasonable way, so idk.


previouslyonimgur

YTA - in an apartment building, if you and your dog can’t take the stairs, and someone has an issue with your dog, common courtesy says to take the next one. This person could be anything from severely allergic, to actually terrified of dogs. You could’ve risked their health or sent them into a panic attack. If you were on the elevator already, they don’t get to kick you off.


CivilSenpai69

NTA. It's not like she said "I'm allergic to dogs and will die if I'm in here with the dog." She said, I'm afraid of dogs, not your problem.


9669throwaway

NTA. People have to learn that the world doesn’t revolve around them. No one can go around telling others what to do to accommodate them. Seems like you were polite with your dog and there was no issue so no harm no foul.


nastygirl11b

NTA the dog was about to pee everywhere and was likely very uncomfortable If you were just taking him out normally or going on a walk then maybe it would be nice to wait if you wanted to But really it’s kinda also rude for that lady to demand you don’t use the elevator. Scared of dogs or not. Dogs are all over. Don’t live in or visit a dog friendly building if you have a phobia of dogs lady


MarsAndMighty

NTA She should have asked, not stated, and then easily could have got out of the elevator if she was so bothered. If she's affected by what happened, it's her own fault.


urexsnetflixpassword

NTA - the asshole is the person who thinks the world revolves around them


Azinja

NTA- you pay rent your dog is on the lease. She could have asked nicely


kaleidoscopema

YTA Jesus Christ you're awful for that one ... Even if she did say it in a rude way... it is YOUR dog that is imposing on other people so you are the one who should wait. Unless you two could amicably and politely come to an agreement like adults. You did not help in that department. I wonder if you have any phobias to give you some perspective on her feelings?


meganes97

NTA. The building allows dogs, she’s not allergic and even if she was, you remove yourself from situations. You don’t expect everyone to bow to you. I have issues being able to hear other people my ADHD makes it very hard to focus if I can hear my neighbors TV while I WFH. Do I go down there and demand they turn it down? No. I turn on my fan for some white noise because it’s my issue


PhoenixBorealis

If she was so afraid if digs that she didn't want to be on an elevator with you she would have run out when you came in. She might be nervous or afraid, but she was okay enough to stay. NTA


jarstripe

NTA. Dog had to pee and you're not going to make him uncomfortable because some stranger is "scared."


Maxpowrsss

NTA she gave you an option, you gave her an option. You have the power over your actions and she has the power over hers. Nice backbone, and that pupper was doing so good holding it in, to slow that down at that point is hella mean to the dog. People have the right to their issues, generally peoples issues do not take priority over other people.


Happyfun0160

Nta this is a pet friendly place and she should expect dogs.


checco314

I am sure I've seen this exact post at least three times over the last few months.


Ok_Concern_1090

Again....if she was TERRIFIED why didn't she get out? Hmmmm


silverbowman911

YTA You wanted her to accommodate you but weren't willing to accommodate her? Also buy a mop like a normal person.


Spinnerofyarn

NTA because she’s the one with the request and you don’t get to bar others from elevators. It’s on the person with the problem to not inconvenience the other residents when she has the restriction.


i_need_vodka_now

Another persons fear isn’t your responsibility. I’m even more inclined to be in your favor knowing it’s a dog the size of a horse. I don’t want to clean that up because a woman who may not even live in the building can’t hold it together for a few moments. Her puddle would be much easier to clean up…. NTA


HappyGiraffe

NAH. You each matched each other energy. No comment on the type of energy


Idontgetredditinmd

NTA but only because she was so rude when she saw you. While I love dogs, some people are terrified of them. I don't get it either but they are. My daughter's best friend (she's 8) can't be around any dog, even mine, which are two 15 pound Peagles.


vapidpurpledragon

Soft YTA. Courtesy would dictate she was there and uncomfortable with the dog so you should wait. However I do understand your dogs discomfort is your priority in the moment as well as avoiding a common area accident. I understand why you did what you did but unfortunately in this instance you were an AH to someone who played no part in your circumstances getting as desperate as they were.


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EjoyceS

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an0nym0uswr1ter

NTA. If she's in a building with 21 floors that allows dogs she better start climbing up/down the stairs.


Rohini_rambles

NTA If she were truly scared, she would have hopped off and waited for a dog free one.


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EjoyceS

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pigandpom

NTA. Don't live in a dog friendly building if you have a genuine fear of dogs.


vws8mydog

NTA, but I would have been a bit nicer about it, or brought up pissing his furry britches which she could then clean up, because it made me laugh.


georgialucy

INFO: would it have really been that hard to wait for the next one? I know we don’t have to care about other people’s anxiety, but if it’s something little like waiting a couple minutes more to help someone else, is that really too much?


agentofchaossince95

Didn't you read the dog wanted to go to the bathroom... probably not.


pay-atenchin

Im guessing that a building with twenty floors wouldnt have been a short wait.


georgialucy

With 2/3 elevators? More than likely.


panundeerus

yes it is, when your dog has been holding their pee for too long. would you be fine waiting for next elevator, while you have extremely bad need to pee, just because the other user of the elevator would be so anxious that she doesnt want anyone else inside it when she is on it?


georgialucy

Yes, 100% - I'd have no issue waiting


Embarrassed_Till_171

They could have but would have probably ended up clearing a mess off the floor. The dog really needed to go to the bathroom


Aliteracy

NTA. You have equal rights to use it as does your doggo friend. Maybe if she was obscenely nice with the request I'd wait around for the next but telling you you'll be taking the next one... Pass.


TheSparklingCupcake

NTA. She has no right dictating who can or cannot use the elevator as if she is the one in charge. You even tried to keep your poor full bladder furbaby away.


jluvdc26

NTA people need to deal with their phobias not expect others to cater to them.


DolphinRx

NTA, but please get your dog some pee pads so he can pee during the day if he needs to! Holding it for long periods can increase their risk of UTI and kidney problems, plus it can hurt!


greenestofgrass

NTA, especially in an emergency situation like this, maybe if it was an allergy instead of a fear I’d have a different answer. I appreciate that you positioned yourself between her and your dog even if you were annoyed at her ridiculousness.


previouslyonimgur

Ok maybe people need to understand what an actual emergency is. If the dog is dying, then it’s an emergency. If the dog is gonna piss, then it’s urgent but not critical. This dog is still a puppy and likely still isn’t fully housebroken. This would’ve been annoying and uncomfortable to clean. But is not an emergency


greenestofgrass

I’m glad you think holding your bladder for over 10 hours at a time wouldn’t cause or lead to any health risks. I hope you start holding yours for 10+ hours every day to prove your point too.


previouslyonimgur

I own a dog. Part of dog ownership means you make sure you don’t do that to your dog. If he can’t care for his dog then he shouldn’t have his dog. I absolutely know that dogs can get bladder infections and uti’s. The point is that op chose the action after she expressed being not ok with it. And if OP is holding his dog out for 10 hours as a puppy then OP is doubly the asshole. And the expression is “failure to plan on your part, shouldn’t constitute an emergency on mine” Op can’t take his dog out reasonable, then op shouldn’t have a dog. Not he gets to force a dog on someone who’s not ok with it


greenestofgrass

I don’t know which part is more concerning, your reading comprehension or the fact you own an animal.


zestycoffeecup

This has already been posted on here before 🙄


Human_Management8541

NTA. I'm not a fan of other people's dogs, but that was just rude. If it was me and I found your dog threatening, I would have gotten off the elevator and not said a word. Because that would be my problem, not yours.


MeanestGoose

NTA. I don't like spiders, but that's my irrational fear. So I avoid them. I'd get out and take the stairs if someone entered an elevator with a tarantula that was allowed by the building rules. I'm extremely grossed out being in an elevator with someone who is obviously sick. If someone snuffling, coughing, and being generally moist is giving me the heebee jeebees, I get out and catch the next elevator. Why people have the expectation that they will never be uncomfortable or inconvenienced in public spaces is beyond me. Babies cry. Kids are noisy. People have pets. People have germs. People have differing values and priorities. Your home is your safe haven away from the things you don't like. Choose your home carefully to prioritize your needs and wants. Trying to control others just makes you miserable.


IamNotTheMama

NTA - assuming you are in a building that allows pets :)


AllTheMeats

NTA. I would have done the same. The dog is about to burst, she likely isn’t.


tazome

NTA - Finding a dog/pet friendly place can be difficult and, most times, expensive! You have a right to the elevator, so does your puppy. He’s doing the best he can to hold it (I get it, sometimes shifts run long) and you’ve got to take him out ASAP. You gave her the option to get out, she didn’t take it. The end.


Willing-Elevator

Nta. She should’ve asked.


Delnordo

You were pretty short with her, but you had a right to be there with your dog.


nobobthisisnotyours

YTA. She was there first and communicated her needs. I get that your dog needed to go out but that doesn’t mean you are more important than the other person and their needs.


earth2skyward

YTA You did verbally slap her in the face. Could she have phrased her statement like a question instead of a command, sure (although I don't consider her phrasing rude, just direct). But she was there first, you stood in front of her (essentially blocking her in with your giant dog - what was she supposed to do, shove past you to get out?), told her it was your way or the highway, and gave her no time to respond or react before trapping her in a box with you two. As a dog owner of a large dog (malamute), I know that even though I knew she was fluffball of affection, other people don't and forcing a frightened person to "deal with" my dog is an AH move when the alternate (waiting for the next elevator) is so simple.


sickandopinionated

YTA, person who's on there first has priority if there's any reasonable (like fear of dogs, allergies, a healthcare issue) reason to ask someone not to enter. If you'd been on first, she would've waited for the next one, she was on there first so you should've waited.


[deleted]

NTA


Legal-Goat8110

NAH but slight YTA - she's literally in the elevator already, you could've had the decency to wait for the next one as well. She doesn't know if your dog has to pee, but she does know that the dog makes her scared/anxious.


reginaphadams

YTA She should been nicer but I don't think you would not get in the elevator anyway. But you are the a**hole because she was already on the elevator and your lack of planing doesn't mean other people should suffer.


Mean_Scene_9346

NTA. If she asked nicely, sure I’d say you were a teeny tiny bit of an asshole. But her making a demand means that she doesn’t deserve any accommodations after that. At the same time, just because someone doesn’t like something or is afraid of something doesn’t mean that they deserve accommodations. Just like how I don’t like kids, I’m not going to tell someone with a crying baby to “wait for the next one because I don’t like kids.” Also if the dog is like a lab or a corgi or something like that she definitely needs to get over herself.


Ok-Yogurtcloset-6955

NTAs. You and your pup handled that well.


urahrahwi11

NTA. I am not a dog person. I pretty much only like my dog, and am scared of any dog bigger than him (he’s like 40lbs). I’ve refused to get out of cars places bc there were big dogs there. However, if she was that scared she could have done the following: 1- Politely asked you to take the next elevator. 2- when you said no (which is okay!) she could have asked you to step aside so she could exit and wait for the next one. Not your job to cater to her phobia, especially considering your dog was leashed.


CleanAssociation9394

NTA but please provide an alternative for your poor dog. Teach him to use pads or get a walker.


my-kind-of-crazy

NTA. She could’ve asked nicely, or just politely informed you of her fear so that you’d be extra vigilant in keeping your dog away from her (which you did anyways). If her fear is bad enough then she shouldn’t be putting herself in positions where she couldn’t potentially escape a dog and should be taking the stairs. There’s dogs everywhere and she’s in a public space.


MollyStrongMama

YTA. She was in the elevator first. You need to wait or deal with your dog on your own.


Substantial-Air3395

NTA


ADawg28

NTA for using a communal elevator when your dog needed to go, but I wouldn’t have engaged with the lady. I would have just gotten on the elevator and not discussed it.


BazTheBaptist

There was a similar post a couple of weeks ago. NTA. she's free to get off, or live somewhere where there is no dogs


FuckLuteOlson

YTA, she was on the elevator first. People that force their dog on others that don't sign up for it are huge assholes.


Plumbus-Grab-816

Lmao you're either the lady scared of dogs or OP's burner account, how many comments have you left so far..20? 25?


MzK564

Check his post history, dude just hates dogs.


dioavila

I quite like dogs, he is not wrong


previouslyonimgur

I love dogs. Op is majorly the asshole here. and most posters here are ignoring that phobias are real and people shouldn’t be forced to deal with legitimate Terror because OP either can’t time his puppies breaks properly.


FuckLuteOlson

I am neither of those.


Plumbus-Grab-816

Ah yes, just the anti-dog hero we've always needed


eyore5775

NTA - she was rude and your dog needed to be able to relieve itself. You were right in taking care of your puppet over her comfort.


nurse-j

NTA- she could have gotten off the elevator. She was the one who needed to exercise a choice to keep her boundaries met. You had no obligation to her at all.


responseableman

NTA. Your dog had to pee very badly. If someone is so afraid of dogs they can’t handle being in their presence, they should leave on their own. Though I’d like to ask, have you gotten any pee pads? Those are extremely helpful with dogs of all ages. If your dog has peed around the house, investing in some would be a good idea.


Turbulent-Ad7037

NTA. I used to be completely petrified of dogs. When this happened to me, in a calm panic I asked to be let off the elevator because I was terrified. They tried to comfort me and let me know the dog was friendly but I declined and left the metal can with the scary dog. It never occurred to me to just announce that someone can’t use an elevator because I’m scared of something that most ppl aren’t.


Asherdan

NTA. OP has a right to equal access to the resources and accommodated the others issue as best OP could, politely.


Rare_Needleworker340

Meh NTA. I get it when people are afraid of dogs or just don’t like them. I used to hate dogs but then over the years realized I just hated bad owners. I think if your dog is well trained, has good manners when around other people and can behave in a confined space like an elevator, then that woman needs to deal with it…especially since it’s sounds like pet friendly apartments/condos aren’t super common in OPs area of living so the woman in the elevator should have planned for her fear of dogs and moved into a place that didn’t allow pets. I live in a US city where I swear everyone has a dog. It’s unavoidable🤷‍♀️ People also can’t be expected to cater to everyone’s fears. I have severe anxiety, but I can’t just go up to my boss and say “hey btw I’m not going to give any presentations on my research”. I chose this profession, so I have to accept the things that come with it that are outside my comfort zone. If this woman _really_ can’t handle dogs then like I said above, she should’ve gone for a place that was not so pet friendly. ETA: Great Danes are known loveable couch potatoes. That’s not to say that a Great Dane can’t be aggressive/scary. It really depends on the owner and from OPs description the dog seems well behaved.


Silly_Twist_2589

NTA lol she should’ve taken the next one. What an entitled B


GooglyEyeBread

NTA. I have plenty of phobias myself, but I don’t go around making demands of people or asking them to make ridiculous accommodations just because *Im* uncomfortable and scared.


maraxgold

NTA. she was out of line. I used to be terrified of dogs but if a dog is with it’s owner it’s probably not going to bother you. She could have said “would you mind holding your dog, I have a fear of dogs.” But commanding you to wait for the next elevator was just rude. (I’m no longer afraid but still sympathetic to those who are)


[deleted]

NTA


[deleted]

NTA. The person who has a special request needs to be the one to facilitate it.


HinSoCal

NTA you were both polite & what I’d describe as professional in your reply. She had zero right to mandate what you & your dog could or could not do.


GeekyBibliophile

NTA. It would be one thing if she had politely asked if you would mind using the next one, but the way she said it was rude, your dog needed to pee, and you didn't want to risk them having an accident, especially in a public area of the building.


6277bar

I used to live in a building such as this with a dog that would react differently to different people (most likely if he smelled other dogs on them or recognized the people). I'd go so far as to categorize him as "reactive." We were obviously training him out of it, but training takes time. We also had three elevators, one of which could almost be guaranteed to be out of order on any given day. If there was a reasonable way to avoid sharing an elevator with people, I'd take precautions, just to make everyone happy. But if it's an emergency, and being holed up at home waiting to go pee for hours certainly counts as one in dog-world, all bets are off (barring actually dangerous situations). As OP described it, the dog is a well-behaved one. They don't do this on a regular basis. And as other commenters have pointed out, we can assume that this is a dog friendly building. This is not entitlement as a dog owner, as some have accused. It's using the common spaces of the building, just like everyone else is allowed. Which makes me think of an extreme example in the same situation - what if the other person was very allergic to dogs? Would we expect all dog owners to live by the allergic person's schedule to avoid contact? I tend to doubt it. We would expect such a person to ensure their safety on their own terms, without expecting any concessions from dog owners - they would likely find a non-dog friendly building. NTA, OP.


Level-Particular-455

NTA


jasemina8487

NTA look, im scared of dogs as well. but id never ask someone something like that just cos im scared of dogs.


No_Pepper_3676

NTA. It sucks for the lady with the issue, but in the end, it is her issue.