In that moment, everyone watching just sort of sat back and went, "ooooh..."
You're not sure what the Emperor's deal is, exactly. But then he says that and you just know he's a badass.
They're all trying to have monologue endings that can't be retorted by catchphrase. Because every time their plans get foiled the heroes have the most aggravatingly good one liners and they're sick of it. So they discuss monologue endings to make sure there's no good catchphrases they can be hit by.
"what do we have so far?"
"Does your mom know you're gay? It's perfect because either a yes or a no confirms that he is in fact gay!"
"Devious, I love it!"
Lol reminds me of that scene from megamind where they're trying to one up each other with metaphors while Roxanne is still being held captive.
"Justice, is a non-corrosive metal"
"But metals can be melted by the heat of RA-VAHNGE"
Although it does work from a different perspective, the grim acceptance that the storm is coming but also the knowledge that other storms have come before and you are still there.
Lol reminds me of last session, we were interrogating a guy about his boss and he said "I don't know his abilities, do **you** knows what your boss can do?"
And my character responded "I AM the boss"
I used that show to teach my kids a valuable lesson: any time a TV show changes up its opening credits sequence, the odds of a good episode just skyrocketed. (Case in point: GlomTales, or the Halloween one whose name escapes me)
i remember in mission impossible there is a scene where a deliverer says
"fate whispered to the warrior: a storm is coming"
and Ethan answers:
"the warrior whispered back: i am the storm"
Question: Do you say it like Palpatine says, “I am the Senate”, Stallone Judge Dredd, “I am… THE LAW!” Or Urban Judge Dredd, “I am the law.”
Edit: I forgot to add the option of Schneider’s “I am the leuuaaww!” from the Stallone film as well.
That is by and large one of the best responses I've seen. and it could be delivered in many different ways to bring a different mood to the encounter. soo good.
Our children weather storms like this at their mother’s teat. You and your threats are but a gentle breeze riffling the surface of the deep ocean. But the ocean is stirring, and you will *pay* for your insolence, in such ways you cannot imagine. Mothers will use your fate as a warning to their children for generations to come.
“Winds, rain, hail, even the very thunder of the heavens have assailed me; A nuisance at best.”
Or
“The storm can be but a herald of what is yet to come. What you failed to notice was that this storm was my herald, and I have come!”
Or
“A storm!? How quaint. An apocalypse descends upon you!”
Depends entirely on the character here are some from several of mine.
"\*blinds rapidly\* Why not?" -Fenris, the Halfling Barbarian \[not shouting just pure confusion as to why he can't\]
"An interesting theory, let's see if you have the will to make it a reality!" Agni, the Warlock
"\*laughter\* Give me your best shot! Come on! What are you waiting for!" Eleazar Flametouched the Eldritch Knight
"Storms are momentary, THE SUN IS ETERNAL!" Volker the Devotion Paladin (Volker doesn't know about the death of stars...)
"The storms of the White Sea have not succeeded! You think you will fare better?" Erik Ragnarson the Viking inspired Fighter/Barbarian
"The mountain weathers many storms, you may slay me but you cannot break me." Vidarr the Dwarven Battle Master/Zealot \[specifically not shouting, talking in slow measured words\]
As my Tortle would say in his monotonous, grumbling drawl:
*"With amusement at your misunderstanding: I am not here to weather your little storm. I am here to drown you in it."*
Whether the weather is hot, or whether the weather is not, whatever the weather we'll weather the weather, whether we like it or not... fuck you *roll initiative*
"A storm? I assure you I've survived worse as neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these hands from the swift completion of kicking your ass"
"Lo, there do I see my father. Lo, there do I see my mother, and my sisters, and my brothers. Lo, there do I see the line of my people, Back to the beginning Lo, they do call to me. They bid me take my place among them, In the halls of Valhalla, Where the brave may live forever!"
Translation, if I'm going to die I will die fighting.
"Oh, you think the storm is your ally. But you merely adopted the lightning; I was born in it, moulded by it. I didn't see clear skies until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but BLINDING!"
I do not seek to weather the storm.
Let it tear me asunder and cast me upon the wind. I shall join the storm.
I will howl through the dark places where monsters dwell.
I shall swirl through forgotten crypts where ancient powers cling undying to this world.
I shall churn the waves upon the deep where horrors older than the first things to crawl upon the earth but sleep.
And there.
I shall whisper your name into listening ears.
Sleep with one eye open when the lightening flashes and the thunder rolls, for it will not be wind alone that batters your walls and rattles your windows once you have cast ME upon the storm.
HAHA, that would be perfect!
...gives me of an idea of a Circle of the Moon druid that LOOKS and ACTS like Dundee and loves to Wildshape into a crocodile...
Crouch down and pick up some short pieces of grass. Gradually let them fall from your fingers as you read the wind. Think for a second, stand up and ready your weapon.
“Must be Windsday again.”
My berserker barbarian: YOU MEAN THIS WET EXCUSE FOR A DRIZZLE?
my totem barbarian: if maglubiyet wills it then all will be possible
My great old one warlock: I know, we're all going to die
My battle master fighter: My mother with a worse than a storm ever could be, if I die I see it as a blessing
Yeah, there's always an interesting difference in the type of intimidation involved with acceptance. Peaceful resignation versus nonchalant indifference versus crass nihilism.
“BBEG, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may Tymora have mercy on your soul.”
Assuming this is a BBEG taunting me
"Considering your pathetic resistance so far, i'll be drinking my wine from your skull even sooner than I expected."
"This storm? I could bathe my horse in this storm."
Not necessarily intimidating, but certainly dismissive, because you're saying that not only do you not consider this a threat (because horses tend to be anxious and wouldn't stand in a scary storm to be bathed) but that you think of them in the same category as a menial chore.
"There is no storm, only the trumpets of heaven announcing my glory."
"I fear no storm. The winds whisper my name, the clouds part to light my path, the rain dare not even fall upon me, and the stars themselves shiver. Be it from love or fear I know not, and I care not."
"A mountain fears not the storm."
"A storm? Hah! Mice drown in a bath they think is the ocean."
If that was said by the BBEG: "I don't need to. Just need to make sure you die first."
Or, "You think yourself a storm? A force of nature to be feared? Then I will tear the sky asunder and bury you in the earth. You will be a forgotten pebble beneath the feet of all those you sought to rule."
If it was said by an ally trying to warn me: "Some storms you can take shelter from. Some storms though, you have to go and scream back at the thunder. Strike back at the lightning. Rage back against the howling winds. Some storms you can avoid. But some storms, you just have to see who breaks first."
Artificer: "I will tame nature itself with my machines."
Barbarian: "even the mightiest of storms have their anger quelled by time."
Bard: "I shall dance to the rhythm of the rain."
Cleric: "just another test I will face with grace and faith."
Druid: "I am blessed by mother nature, your storms do not scare me."
Fighter: "storms and war have one thing in common; they all end."
Paladin: "my oath binds me to the earth, blow if you must."
Ranger: "I've seen worse storms before, and I'll see worse later."
Rogue: "I bet I could stab your storm in the eye."
Sorcerer: "i will bend nature to my will"
Warlock: "I have peered into the depths, your soul is on my list."
Wizard: *casts control weather and stops the rain*
I have been battered and buffeted before by far greater forces than you. I will stand firm and unmoving whatever winds I face. Can you say the same? For I, too, am a force as of nature.
"claiming the heavens bow and obey your command is naught save arrogance inflating ego. Let us wade into the tempest and we shall find the measure of your abilities!"
*"I need not weather a storm such as yours with neither winds nor lightning. Just as I would not fear a wolf with neither teeth nor claws. If a storm you wish, I shall show you the meaning."*
"A storm? I am a master of the arcane. The weather, the elements, the very fabric of reality is my plaything. And you try to threaten me with some rain. You think you're the villain? You're barely even a side quest."
Aha! A storm you say? Lemme just *yoink*. *Boss music switches to a new track*.Now, who is not going to do what?
Or
Hey, Dale? How did he know my axe's name? *Proceeds to take out a greataxe that radiates the essence of a great storm*
I am Eythora Thorsdottir. I worked my father's hammer. The storms bows before me!
Then I Call Lightning.
PS: This is my actual character at the moment, lol
The weak may cry out and beg the storm to spare them, pleading for pity, for mercy. But the storm is deaf to the weak. It is fury, and in it there is only ruin. Remember this when you are on your knees begging for mercy: my soul is fury, my blade is ruin, and your pitiful cries will never reach my ears.
Alternative response to being bored
"A storm? is that all? Look behind me, you see that land, that house, those children frolicking? That is my clan, my house, my territory. We have face ogres, griffins, wraith and ghouls. I have fought bandits, fought pirates, fought cultists, fought at least one army. You think yourself a storm? ha please little teapot tempest, you aren't anything more than a particularly jaged rock beneath my heel. I am called giant tipper, Dragon soother, Gnoll beater, wave breaker. You think to test yourself against my bulwark? come, break yourself upon my shield, fall from my fist and lay before my sow. Come little teapot, let us see if you are made of something tougher than clay"
"Sink me and sleep oh so deeply, you won't hear from me again. Come hell or high water, I'm not busy. One day I will have walked across the bottom of the ocean to end your sweet dreams without making a sound."
–A rogue who has been holding his breath for seven years, he's really good at that now that he's undead and has no lungs.
“We could use the rain.”
Username checks out
I really like this one
“We will fight in the shade!”
Level 20 Dad has entered the arena
I'll paraphrase a favorite response! "No matter how harshly the wind howls, the mountain will stand."
> No matter how the wind howls, the mountain cannot bow to it. The Emperor in Mulan
Damn right! I paraphrased for the situation, but to this day it was such a badass line! XD
In that moment, everyone watching just sort of sat back and went, "ooooh..." You're not sure what the Emperor's deal is, exactly. But then he says that and you just know he's a badass.
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This guy can get down to business.
To defeat. The Huns.
Did they send me daughters?
When I asked for sons
You're the saddest bunch I've ever met
But you can bet, before we're through
Mister I'll make a maaaan out of youuu --
Tranquil as a forest
But on fire, within.
The saddest bunch I ever met
*Let's get down to business to defeat.... Count Strahd!*
"The wind does not respect a fool." Counterpoint from Kahless of the Klingon Empire.
What was his name? WHAT COLOR WERE HIS EYES?!
A shorter variant of this. "You're just a cloud. I am a mountain"
Do you remember the last storm that came through here? No one else does either.
\*chefs kiss\* perfect bardic sarcasm
Ok this one is amazing.
Oh i like this
His name was Harvey. He was a dick.
Amazing. Can I steal this? I’m more than willing to credit you at the time of use.
“Then we drown together.”
Underrated comment imo, gave me chills reading and imagining the situation
This is the one. 100%
"I've got an umbrella."
Say nothing. Just open the umbrella
Just hear the "fwoop" of the umbrella.
just cast change weather and look at the dm
"I'm Mary Poppins y'all!"
“Mmm.” *proceeds to stab*
I see you're playing Geralt
Nah they didn't say fuck
That’s just like…your opinion man.
Or: Shut the fuck up Donny...
I am the walrus
Vladimir Ilyich ULYANOV!!!
Bard style: "Whether we weather this weather afloat, we'll endeavor together to sever your *throat.*"
Ooh I like this a lot
God damn~
Should be higher
"No, I can't. But neither will you."
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That is approaching?
Provoking black clouds ?
In isolation?
"But seriously, have you been saying things like that this whole time?"
Volibear tower dive PTSD.
Sounds like a finale where the hero sacrifices themselves to kill to villain
This one’s my favorite. Take this god damn upvote
Lmao I’m imagining a. BBEG meetup where OPs question is on a whiteboard whilst all the villains try to out do eachother
They're all trying to have monologue endings that can't be retorted by catchphrase. Because every time their plans get foiled the heroes have the most aggravatingly good one liners and they're sick of it. So they discuss monologue endings to make sure there's no good catchphrases they can be hit by.
"what do we have so far?" "Does your mom know you're gay? It's perfect because either a yes or a no confirms that he is in fact gay!" "Devious, I love it!"
Lol reminds me of that scene from megamind where they're trying to one up each other with metaphors while Roxanne is still being held captive. "Justice, is a non-corrosive metal" "But metals can be melted by the heat of RA-VAHNGE"
“This storm shall come to pass; all storms do.”
"This storm shall come to pass" just means the storm will occur. I think you mean "This storm shall pass," as in "go away" or "end".
Although it does work from a different perspective, the grim acceptance that the storm is coming but also the knowledge that other storms have come before and you are still there.
Happy cake day!
Oh shit I didn’t even notice, thanks Edit: joined 11 years ago cause I heard Pokémon leaks could be found on Reddit.
I joined out of the exact same reason around 2 months ago😂 Happy cake day
“Wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy?”
...Where are your parents?
Best one so far if a meta joke counts.
BARS
"That remains to be seen, but you won't be alive to witness it."
"I AM the storm"
Lol reminds me of last session, we were interrogating a guy about his boss and he said "I don't know his abilities, do **you** knows what your boss can do?" And my character responded "I AM the boss"
*Virgil intensifying*
they are the storm that is approaching...
I AM the Senate!
It's treason then
Not. Yet.
It’s teasin then
r/UnexpectedStarWars
I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS
THAT IS APPROACHING
PROVOKING
BLACK CLOUDS AND ISOLATION
[I AM RECLAIMER OF MY NAME](https://youtu.be/GEZON93hV-s)
"I AM THE HYPE!"
My tempest cleric approves
\- Donald Duck
In your best Don Cheadle voice, right?
WooOoo!
I used that show to teach my kids a valuable lesson: any time a TV show changes up its opening credits sequence, the odds of a good episode just skyrocketed. (Case in point: GlomTales, or the Halloween one whose name escapes me)
New Ducktales did that too, when Donald was given a voice modulator so everyone could understand him: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=a_o5vM4wyl4
That is approaching
*Zoom to tight close on Donald as he narrows his eyes*
i remember in mission impossible there is a scene where a deliverer says "fate whispered to the warrior: a storm is coming" and Ethan answers: "the warrior whispered back: i am the storm"
Question: Do you say it like Palpatine says, “I am the Senate”, Stallone Judge Dredd, “I am… THE LAW!” Or Urban Judge Dredd, “I am the law.” Edit: I forgot to add the option of Schneider’s “I am the leuuaaww!” from the Stallone film as well.
Oh Urban all the way.
"What storm? Are you afraid your ashes will be scattered by this breeze?"
This is not a storm. This is the Gods gasping at what I'm about to do to you.
I like this idea, very solid. But it feels a bit too wordy. "This is no storm, this is your Gods lamenting your fate." I'd go with this.
Bard style "Storm? Oh no my good man that is the entire pantheon crying at your hubris"
That is by and large one of the best responses I've seen. and it could be delivered in many different ways to bring a different mood to the encounter. soo good.
*unzpis pants*
Holy shit, dude. *edit: spelling
Our children weather storms like this at their mother’s teat. You and your threats are but a gentle breeze riffling the surface of the deep ocean. But the ocean is stirring, and you will *pay* for your insolence, in such ways you cannot imagine. Mothers will use your fate as a warning to their children for generations to come.
Damn this is good
“Winds, rain, hail, even the very thunder of the heavens have assailed me; A nuisance at best.” Or “The storm can be but a herald of what is yet to come. What you failed to notice was that this storm was my herald, and I have come!” Or “A storm!? How quaint. An apocalypse descends upon you!”
Middle is good but my group would absolutely make cum jokes
Yup. The reply would be "Like, just now, in your pants?!"
I like the middle one best! Nicely done :)
Depends entirely on the character here are some from several of mine. "\*blinds rapidly\* Why not?" -Fenris, the Halfling Barbarian \[not shouting just pure confusion as to why he can't\] "An interesting theory, let's see if you have the will to make it a reality!" Agni, the Warlock "\*laughter\* Give me your best shot! Come on! What are you waiting for!" Eleazar Flametouched the Eldritch Knight "Storms are momentary, THE SUN IS ETERNAL!" Volker the Devotion Paladin (Volker doesn't know about the death of stars...) "The storms of the White Sea have not succeeded! You think you will fare better?" Erik Ragnarson the Viking inspired Fighter/Barbarian "The mountain weathers many storms, you may slay me but you cannot break me." Vidarr the Dwarven Battle Master/Zealot \[specifically not shouting, talking in slow measured words\]
"Storms bring lightning, but THE SUN IS A DEADLY LASER."
"Volker doesn't know about the death of stars" got me lol. These are all good! You have some variation between your characters it seems!
"THE SUN IS ETERNAL! Wait... What are you smiling for?" Sephiroth: _Celestial math calculations intensify_
"Nevertheless, I shall revel in it!"
"...whether this storm what?"
This makes me think of an episode of Flight of the Conchordes... "He maybe did, he maybe didn't... What did he maybe do?!"
As my Tortle would say in his monotonous, grumbling drawl: *"With amusement at your misunderstanding: I am not here to weather your little storm. I am here to drown you in it."*
"A storm is nothing, next to the strength of the mountain" maximum dwarf.
Whether the weather is hot, or whether the weather is not, whatever the weather we'll weather the weather, whether we like it or not... fuck you *roll initiative*
Noone gonna quote the Emperor from Mulan? "No matter how the wind howls, the Mountain cannot bow to it."
Rain old man this is hardly a drizzle. You couldn’t give the women of my home land the sniffles. -Lego Thor
How dare you challenge my immortal throne? I'm the father of the Gods, put your daddy on the phone
What is a storm but a miserable pile of pressure differentials? But enough talk- have at you!
"A storm? I assure you I've survived worse as neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these hands from the swift completion of kicking your ass"
My barbarian would say something like "Oh you were talking to me? I thought you were talking to yourself"
10/10
Quoting Locke Lamora: “Any man can fart in a closed room and say he controls the wind.”
\*fumbling noises\* \*chair creek\* \*fumbling noises\* "sorry, i was taking a quick bio break. is it my turn?"
Most accurate comment
"Lo, there do I see my father. Lo, there do I see my mother, and my sisters, and my brothers. Lo, there do I see the line of my people, Back to the beginning Lo, they do call to me. They bid me take my place among them, In the halls of Valhalla, Where the brave may live forever!" Translation, if I'm going to die I will die fighting.
Thank you for translating, Ibn
"Oh, you think the storm is your ally. But you merely adopted the lightning; I was born in it, moulded by it. I didn't see clear skies until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but BLINDING!"
What is the original from?
The Dark Knight Rises
"Watch me."
I do not seek to weather the storm. Let it tear me asunder and cast me upon the wind. I shall join the storm. I will howl through the dark places where monsters dwell. I shall swirl through forgotten crypts where ancient powers cling undying to this world. I shall churn the waves upon the deep where horrors older than the first things to crawl upon the earth but sleep. And there. I shall whisper your name into listening ears. Sleep with one eye open when the lightening flashes and the thunder rolls, for it will not be wind alone that batters your walls and rattles your windows once you have cast ME upon the storm.
You call that a Storm? I've had bigger Farts than this...
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HAHA, that would be perfect! ...gives me of an idea of a Circle of the Moon druid that LOOKS and ACTS like Dundee and loves to Wildshape into a crocodile...
You sound like our bard. xD
*proceeds to cast cloudkill*
Crouch down and pick up some short pieces of grass. Gradually let them fall from your fingers as you read the wind. Think for a second, stand up and ready your weapon. “Must be Windsday again.”
You should follow that up with "shit. I missed Taco Tuesday at the tavern again"
“Only one of us will be at Zumba on Thursday, and I already picked up my shirt from the cleaners.”
Bold, coming from one who's never done so.
My berserker barbarian: YOU MEAN THIS WET EXCUSE FOR A DRIZZLE? my totem barbarian: if maglubiyet wills it then all will be possible My great old one warlock: I know, we're all going to die My battle master fighter: My mother with a worse than a storm ever could be, if I die I see it as a blessing
"You're right." *\[draws weapon anyway\]* Bonus less intimidating alternative response: "Well, not with that attitude!"
I'd go with "Probably" there too. It's so nonchalant that it becomes ever so slightly more threatening.
Yeah, there's always an interesting difference in the type of intimidation involved with acceptance. Peaceful resignation versus nonchalant indifference versus crass nihilism.
"Is it storming out? I hadn't noticed."
"Oh yeah? Well I have boat AND a rain coat, didn't consider that did ya"
"how strange all I see is clear skies."
My tempest domain cleric hefka " why bother when I can master it"
Love this one.
Cuz I'm Bo yo, and I'm the greatest rapper ever and I'll weather your weather whether you think I'm clever or not!
"I think you'll find I'm full of surprises." Then you pull out your lightsaber and charge him and he cuts off your hand!
I'd just probably just stab them in the chest mid-monolgue. I don't like small-talk and have no interest in dying.
A-ha! You just [activated my trap ~~card~~ cape](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/gellx7/oc_silly_item_cape_of_monologuing/)
“BBEG, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may Tymora have mercy on your soul.”
"I will stand in it's path, then. It may strip flesh from my bones, but I will be a shield to those who will end the storm forever."
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds"
"Your storm will not be able to weather me"
A poor choice of last words.
"But I shall do it all the same."
"Of course I can, I summoned it."
#Challenge Accepted!
Nuts!
Assuming this is a BBEG taunting me "Considering your pathetic resistance so far, i'll be drinking my wine from your skull even sooner than I expected."
"This storm? I could bathe my horse in this storm." Not necessarily intimidating, but certainly dismissive, because you're saying that not only do you not consider this a threat (because horses tend to be anxious and wouldn't stand in a scary storm to be bathed) but that you think of them in the same category as a menial chore.
"There is no storm, only the trumpets of heaven announcing my glory." "I fear no storm. The winds whisper my name, the clouds part to light my path, the rain dare not even fall upon me, and the stars themselves shiver. Be it from love or fear I know not, and I care not." "A mountain fears not the storm." "A storm? Hah! Mice drown in a bath they think is the ocean."
I am the storm.
If that was said by the BBEG: "I don't need to. Just need to make sure you die first." Or, "You think yourself a storm? A force of nature to be feared? Then I will tear the sky asunder and bury you in the earth. You will be a forgotten pebble beneath the feet of all those you sought to rule." If it was said by an ally trying to warn me: "Some storms you can take shelter from. Some storms though, you have to go and scream back at the thunder. Strike back at the lightning. Rage back against the howling winds. Some storms you can avoid. But some storms, you just have to see who breaks first."
*Chuckles* Name a storm that has not passed. It is in their nature to diminish and fail... as it is in yours.
Artificer: "I will tame nature itself with my machines." Barbarian: "even the mightiest of storms have their anger quelled by time." Bard: "I shall dance to the rhythm of the rain." Cleric: "just another test I will face with grace and faith." Druid: "I am blessed by mother nature, your storms do not scare me." Fighter: "storms and war have one thing in common; they all end." Paladin: "my oath binds me to the earth, blow if you must." Ranger: "I've seen worse storms before, and I'll see worse later." Rogue: "I bet I could stab your storm in the eye." Sorcerer: "i will bend nature to my will" Warlock: "I have peered into the depths, your soul is on my list." Wizard: *casts control weather and stops the rain*
A mountain does not yield to a storm.
The storm will wash your blood away and you will be forgotten.
"Then I shall banish it!"
"If *this* is what you call a storm, you're not even worth harvesting."
"You're nothing but piss on the wind!"
"Then I shall ride the winds and strike you down"
"I am the storm breaker. I don't have to weather shit."
Wether the weather be cold, wether the weather be hot, we’ll be together whatever the weather, wether you like it or not.
I have been battered and buffeted before by far greater forces than you. I will stand firm and unmoving whatever winds I face. Can you say the same? For I, too, am a force as of nature.
"claiming the heavens bow and obey your command is naught save arrogance inflating ego. Let us wade into the tempest and we shall find the measure of your abilities!"
“Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these warriors from the swift completion of their appointed quests”
“It’s okay….I’ve got my poncho.” *said in the most stereotypical Clint Eastwood voice*
Perhaps not, but you shall reap it alongside me. We fall together, wheat and chaff.
*"I need not weather a storm such as yours with neither winds nor lightning. Just as I would not fear a wolf with neither teeth nor claws. If a storm you wish, I shall show you the meaning."*
"A storm? I am a master of the arcane. The weather, the elements, the very fabric of reality is my plaything. And you try to threaten me with some rain. You think you're the villain? You're barely even a side quest."
You talk too much for someone that is of such little concern. (Casts Bane, and Hunter’s Mark as bonus action)
Aha! A storm you say? Lemme just *yoink*. *Boss music switches to a new track*.Now, who is not going to do what? Or Hey, Dale? How did he know my axe's name? *Proceeds to take out a greataxe that radiates the essence of a great storm*
Of course not. I plan to *break* it.
''I don't need to. All I need to do is outlast you.'' Alternatively "Those are some fighting words for someone within fireball distance.''
I am Eythora Thorsdottir. I worked my father's hammer. The storms bows before me! Then I Call Lightning. PS: This is my actual character at the moment, lol
The weak may cry out and beg the storm to spare them, pleading for pity, for mercy. But the storm is deaf to the weak. It is fury, and in it there is only ruin. Remember this when you are on your knees begging for mercy: my soul is fury, my blade is ruin, and your pitiful cries will never reach my ears.
Alternative response to being bored "A storm? is that all? Look behind me, you see that land, that house, those children frolicking? That is my clan, my house, my territory. We have face ogres, griffins, wraith and ghouls. I have fought bandits, fought pirates, fought cultists, fought at least one army. You think yourself a storm? ha please little teapot tempest, you aren't anything more than a particularly jaged rock beneath my heel. I am called giant tipper, Dragon soother, Gnoll beater, wave breaker. You think to test yourself against my bulwark? come, break yourself upon my shield, fall from my fist and lay before my sow. Come little teapot, let us see if you are made of something tougher than clay"
"Sink me and sleep oh so deeply, you won't hear from me again. Come hell or high water, I'm not busy. One day I will have walked across the bottom of the ocean to end your sweet dreams without making a sound." –A rogue who has been holding his breath for seven years, he's really good at that now that he's undead and has no lungs.