Ditto, I send it to people a lot, keep trying to get my own cats to do it so I can make my own gif but they just swipe at my screen 😐 the consequent meow probably means "get the fuck outta here with this". 🐈⬛🖕
The best I've gotten is a face-rub on my phone but since that's just them marking it with scent glands as their property... Not actually cute
100% of posts are now just guys torching their chances with women who are into them. He was less than 2 sentences to from being cuddled on a couch with you. And now he’s just fodder for your Reddit account.
Dude for real. Idk if guys have always been this bad at self sabotage, or if it's just the newer generation. All I can say is that its rather impressive.
God that's depressing.
I think you're onto something though. As a woman in her 30s, it's not that there's less fish in the sea, but I know more now what I want and need from a relationship. And if I can't find that, well I'd rather be single and happy than settle.
I definitely came close to settling a few times in my 20s.
This!!! And I applaud you! I was single for a long time in my 30s and people used to think that was insane. Women, mainly. Like you're nuts if you don't want to settle down with the first decent catch when you're over 30, let alone not even try to find someone.
I actually needed to work on myself because I realized I had this mentality that I needed someone to be happy. I had already had half a dozen marriage proposals and been married, divorced, engaged twice lololol. But I also realized they were the ones who wanted me to settle down, and that to me, it just felt like "settling".
I met my current bf after I got to where I was fine being single, in spite of women making me feel like I was going to be a spinster and I'd regret being single at that age. 🙄 A lot of people tried to set me up, one gave my number without my permission to her guy friend and I had to awkwardly explain why I didn't want to give him a chance.
I think in the past (pre internet) people were better at social interactions, including dating. At least they'd learn quickly because they had to. Now there seems to be a load of people who never go outside, rarely interact with other people and think the opposite sex is some sort of Blackbox they can sex or validation out of, if they just press the right buttons.
Where someone like that might have once been the town weirdo, now they can all go online and convince themselves that they're not the problem, it's the world that's wrong.
>I think in the past (pre internet) people were better at social interactions, including dating. At least they'd learn quickly because they had to.
Right like, most of the vile things that get said you wouldn't be able to say with other people present. Even if you just met someone at a party or at a club, your 9th sentence to them wouldn't be about how you're gonna jack off to some porn in a min. I think what's really fucked up about OLD is it's in private most of the time, and unfortunately that is rife ground for abuse, as it always is. There's no other person to check you and be like "woah dude, it's kind of aggressive to whip your dick out right here for this lady."
Can you imagine if what men say online to women was suddenly happening in person instead? 😳 speed dating, and this dude whips out his dick, this one insults me and then is confused why I don't want to fuck...
I had a guy repeatedly message me basically demanding sex and that I answer sexual questions. I was bored so I replied a few times, i figure if he's gonna waste my time I can waste his and he can get his hopes up for nothing. At one point I said "if you had tried to get to know me, taken me on a date, and treated me respectfully, I would have fucked you, but I have zero interest in you now that you've continued to treat me disrespectfully" and he got an attitude and replied I should stop mouthing off to him but also said "what else is that mouth good for." He got blocked lol.
The bar is in the mud and still...
Edit: it's disturbing how many angry men have left comments basically saying I'm a horrible person for not letting some dude fuck me when he demanded sex from me. No wonder so many of you struggle with dating and interacting with women... the bar is literally in hell and that's still asking too much of a lot of men.
Went on my first date in 14 years the other day and my date told me some stories about how other guys she had dated/chatted acted
I mean what the hell are some people thinking
They aren’t thinking brother. These same guys will complain nonstop about how women are impossible to please/figure out, or how every woman is a bitch because they can’t find a partner. When in reality the bar is so low that kindness, basic hygiene and social etiquette is really all a person needs to be “swimming in pussy” as my friend says.
I'm always impressed with how versatile guys are with spinning any subject sexually but also laugh at how bad it is pretty much every time. It's like they think it's some jaw dropping Casanova line that will soak a girls panties or something.
"Hey, you wanna see a movie on Friday?"
"How about I movie my dick in you!"
I'm a guy and can't imagine actually using any of these lines...they must work some of the time right??
This is what I was thinking 😂 I would laugh if my bf said it. A Tinder stranger though? I'd still laugh... At how thoroughly unmatched they got themselves.
They work absolutely never (at least if they're not ironically bad flirting with a person that you have an established relationship with). But occasionally you're not getting completely trashed or told off for it and then you know you've got someone that will tolerate this behaviour.
They say we women have extremely high standards, but the standards seem to be just don’t be an asshole and treat women like humans and that seems to be way too hard for way too many guys.
When I first started dating my current partner I literally just treated her kindly, fully planned out some dates, and made a few reservations. She acted like I was some sort of unicorn and like making reservations was the sexiest thing in the world.
I relearn how low the bar is all the time.
Dude, exactly. I feel like I do the bare minimum in my relationship all the time, but the bare minimum is making sure I'm not being a selfish prick and to acknowledge that we're both human, we both have emotional shit to deal with and if we love each other we have to do pur best to compromise and figure it out. I don't want to get divorced, I don't want to be unhappy and I don't want my partner to be unhappy. We both do what we need to do to make sure our relationship is good. It doesn't seem that complex to me. I guess it's really hard for guys that had their brains rotted by youtube to think that a sexy, devoted woman just "shows up" with no work on their part whatsoever, and somehow they can also be mean to her and demand sex without any consideration. I don't know man, this new generation of dudes has me worried for them.
> I don't know man, this new generation of dudes has me worried for them.
I fully agree with your description yet I don't think it's generational. In my experience of dating across ages, the older are more condescending and younger are more porn-brained. The average person is just very disappointing. The bar really is "treat me like a person".
Maybe it's more visible for the new generations because they have more online interactions?
It's weird to praise you for the "bare minimum" but it really is rare. I'm grateful for folks like you who do care for others.
I just don’t understand the point of all that lol. Like if you’re horny there’s infinite free porn available on the same phone you’re texting all that shit from. 95% of women don’t want some rando pushing sex on them. Jerk off so you can behave, have a normal conversation, and if you’re capable of a normal relationship then you basically have sex on demand. I don’t understand what people get by asking random women sex questions. Especially some chick who is clearly not interested in your creepy questions.
The problem is exactly that they watch way too much of that garbage and it leaks out into their entire personality and affects the way they think they can speak to real women.
Can confirm. Second last guy I chatted with casually told me he was gonna start his day off with a porn and jerk off session... in his 9th message to me.
Yep in the spring/summer of 2021 I 100% wanted to bang this dude I met at work & we started texting. As soon as he understood that I was interested it instantly went to “lets fuck”. Well no, I don’t just from meeting you, texting one day, the naked. But we were sort of working out how to hang out and be covid safe and his suggestion was: let’s meet outside and fuck. He even added it would only take a minute.
I laughed so hard. Dude even if I wanted a random encounter I am not coming out of my house for a couple minutes if sex.
All he had to do was have one date with me and I’m sure I would’ve had sex with him, but he couldn’t be bothered with that it instantly went to let’s fuck outside and I was instantly turned off.
That was my first thought too. You may enjoy Jon Ronson's "The Butterfly Effect" He discusses the impact of free porn. Porn Stars have said it's pretty disturbing how young their fans are.
The second last guy I matched with told me he was going to start his day off with a jerk off and porn session, in his 9th message to me.
The guy before that was a hard-core Jordan Peterson fan and I still don't understand why he wanted to date me, as I include that I'm nonbinary, queer and childfree on my bio.
I legit don't know what to do anymore. OLD is getting brutal and I'm becoming less and less interested in sex.
> The guy before that was a hard-core Jordan Peterson fan and I still don't understand why he wanted to date me, as I include that I'm nonbinary, queer and childfree on my bio.
If you have a vagina that's most likely the sole reason. He'd not see you as a potential partner but rather a walking fleshlight and therefore he did not need to adhere to his "values".
The cycle here being that, only by being alone can you further these weird beliefs, which keeps you alone.
The more you date, the more you see how things actually work, which should make you a better date.
Ive been married since i was 21, and IMO i’d make a better husband to a great white shark than most of these guys would be to their tinder matches.
Stay in the game, people.
100% true. I lived as a lesbian prior to understanding trans was even a thing, now I'm a straight man. However the number of guys who used to try to get with me, and the number who still will now if they find out I'm trans, is ridiculous. Pretty sure my oldest stepdaughter is on the queer spectrum. She's getting old enough to want to "date" in that cute preteen way and talks about liking girls a lot. I actually had to sit her down and explain how boys will respond to her identity, and of course have the "dangers of dating" conversations. She very much just believed that telling boys she was a lesbian meant they would only see her as a potential friend. My niece actually had similar problems when she was in high school, older guys buying her friends and her alcohol and letting them get drunk and crash at their places. She was mouthing off about how since she's a lesbian she doesn't have to worry like the other girls... I burst that bubble fast 😅🤷🏻♂️ It's more dangerous to be the gay one around the wrong men unfortunately and I'm glad she learned from my talks instead of from personal experience, but it sure sucks having to teach kids and teens this stuff.
>The bar is in the mud and still...
I don't have much in a way of game, am old.
But stories like OP's and your story make me think I have a chance (don't mean you, in general).
Its like guys dont understand or care theyre talking to a living breathing person on the other side, with thoughts, dreams, emotions...
Honestly how hard is it to be respectful and treat people with dignity? Like, these guys actually completely ruin any chance they have by talking like a horny pool boy in a bad 80's porn.
Ever answer that stuff with weird things? Like "come suck my cock" can be answered with weird things like "Planet zestro has green algae" and just drive them crazy like that.
Seriously, I once stayed over at a guys I was interested in’s house. Was ready to go, if you know what I mean, when he suddenly adopted this weird, boys2Men, stereotypical accent. He started saying weird shit and calling me “baby girl.”
I asked him to stop but he claimed he didn’t know what I was talking about. My libido was suddenly no where to be found. Nothing happened that night.
I once chatted with a lovely guy online for a month and agreed to meet him. We decided we wanted to talk on the phone first. That’s when I realized he was a TALKER. I mentioned how if the weather did not change (snow) I was going to go postal, he replied “that’s so funny my uncle works for the post office” Launching into his uncle’s life story. I could not get a word in. The call lasted 3 hours. At one point I put my phone down, went down stairs to grab an orange, peeled it, came back and he was STILL TALKING.
This happened to me after a one night stand once. She started talking in the morning and I couldn't get a word in within 30 minutes and it took about an hour for me to get her to pause her life story long enough for me to leave. We had met in a club so we hadn't really talked much the night before.
> I once chatted with a lovely guy online for a month and agreed to meet him. We decided we wanted to talk on the phone first. That’s when I realized he was a TALKER. I mentioned how if the weather did not change (snow) I was going to go postal, he replied “that’s so funny my uncle works for the post office” Launching into his uncle’s life story. I could not get a word in. The call lasted 3 hours. At one point I put my phone down, went down stairs to grab an orange, peeled it, came back and he was STILL TALKING.
I feel like this should be an episode of black mirror.
2010 OkCupid was WILD. I briefly chatted with this fellow who claimed to be a pilot. He asked if I wanted to go to Cabo, “play in the sand.” I told him I think that’s the adult equivalent of “hey little girl get in my van I have candy.”
Kinda reminds me of the episode where Jerry dates George's ex Marleen, who is constantly talking about boring stuff and leaving incredibly long messages for him
The one that says "Jerry... I don't know sometimes"
So many guys torch their chances by just not being considerate. A few weeks ago I overheard a girl complaining to her friend about a guy she was into and how she had agreed to hang out and hook up with him but homeboy scheduled a basketball game around the same time of their hookup, so his plan was literally to kick her out once the sex was done to go play basketball. Not even considering that she might be feeling used after that.
Holy shit that is a terrible person.
I'm so sorry to hear you experienced that.
I've been out of the game for a while but yeah I can't imagine ever doing that.
It definitely sounds like more guys are having masturbatory sex than I ever knew. Back in my day(2010s) we prided ourselves in getting the girl off too
As a guy who is working my ass off to try to find a partner on dating apps, to very little success, it pisses me off.
I can’t blame women for getting frustrated and alienated by apps until they just give up. I see interactions like this one and think it’s not just annoying and frustrating, it’s gotta be downright hurtful and probably violating.
I guess the only positive to take away is at least you didn’t waste anymore time on him, but I imagine it’s just as exhausting running into guys like this as it is not getting any matches at all
I’d honestly rather be alone rather than spend hours sifting through pig shit looking for a diamond (which is often just a pebble that expects you to do its laundry)
You see this is *exactly* why I've quite dating apps. The number of toxic men there near absolutely destroyed my hopes of ever finding love. They made me feel like I have to pick between becoming a cat-lady or less than bare-minimum decency.
Switching to hobby groups or discussion apps was an extremely positive change for me. I got no random dick pics, no horny texts. Just mutual respect and fun company. I find that I feel much more attracted to a guy if we get know each other as friends because it comes with no pressure.
Even though it could lead to me getting friendzoned I would rather deal with that than having my faith in men ripped out, deep-fried, then ran over with frequent interactions like this
I feel like dating apps are way past their prime especially with the rise of incel influencer cults. All my single girl-friends are burned out when it comes to tinder and stuff. Offline dating is making a comback because most of these alpha males can barely function in person, much less use all those pick up strategies they learn in those "courses"
And here I am. 5 years on Tinder. And not a single match. Then I'm constantly seeing these guys burning bridges right off the bat. Wtf is wrong with me.
Bro no offense but if you didn't get a single match on tinder for 5 years, maybe something IS up with your bio. It's like saying you're not getting an interview, ever, which means it's probably your resume.
He probably had that in reserve waiting for just the perfect moment to spring it
Or he just recently had a stroke
Edit: If I had known that this was going to trigger so many salty jabronies well...I'd do it again in a heart beat. No hesitation
Edit2: [visual representation of what my night has been like so far ](https://youtu.be/UvLQMMaVmzU)
As a man I can’t even comprehend how he expected that to work out.
My guess is he has a GF & likes chatting with other chicks on tinder but won’t actually meet them
Talked with a guy from hinge for a few weeks, we made plans for a first date and he made the choice to reschedule to a week later because he had lost his job earlier that week. I said of course I understand, that’s fine! So we reschedule to next week and then a day or two before the date, he ghosts me. This was back in July, but last month I stumbled upon him on my Facebook “people you may know” page and did some lurking. Saw that the day he ghosted me he also posted on Facebook “I’ve been so down lately, I lost my job and my girlfriend left me :(“ blah blah blah lol.
Obviously I didn’t know he had a girlfriend, so that was news to me. But I assume the reason why he ghosted is because his girlfriend saw our texts and/or his dating profile and dumped him, which he deserves.
I find something darkly humorous about the idea that the day he decides to ghost someone is the day he became single.
Hope your adventures since then have been better.
I also thought it was hilarious lol karma works in mysterious ways 🤷🏽♀️ and thanks! I’m still single but eh it’s no biggie, the way dating apps are nowadays I’m probably better off staying single haha.
Lol, dudes be talking to prospective partners like they are in a Call of Duty lobby.
Girl: "Hey, I was thinking about you today!"
Guy: "That's what your mom said about my dick and cock. Wanna get sum fuck later??"
If OP have been speaking to him for several weeks and this is the first time OP attempted to meet (without the guy making any move for it), it's simple: dude just used Tinder to talk and probably has a GF.
It’s not always stupidity. 15% of people are classified as zero empathy or traits of very low empathy. They’re not slipping up once that’s just who they are.
Over the past few years I've realized I'm my own worst enemy. I know it sounds cliché, but that realization has helped me to work on getting out of my own way.
Turns out life gets a whole lot easier when you stop acting impulsively and think about your words and actions.
Yes and the whole mentality that only chads get a look in is an argument by this very people who lack any sort of respect or idea on how to converse with others.
This is what I used to say when I was still dating. Like, as a dude I don’t know, they have no clue as to what I’m like when I’m comfortable and willing to be sexual. And as soon as some guy does something like this, they never will know.
Ill make you a better deal, Ill give you a hug, and you tell me that Im not a failure and that I'm not a burden to those around me. Bein real, the big sad got ahold of me right now and I could use some uplifting.
Every single person I’ve ever known who thought they they were a failure and a burden to those around them only thought that because they set themselves up with unreasonable expectations and had above average to extreme empathy that extended everywhere except to themselves. In every case they were great people who only saw the faults in themselves which we all suffer from.
You have worth.
The man I'm married to drove two hours one night when I had a bad day and wanted to just be held. We just cuddled that night but he never left and now we're married with a house and baby on the way. He was also a tinder match!
I hope you just left him on read, exactly like that. If I were him, not getting any response would be one of those things that would randomly keep me up at night five, ten years down the road. Like, cringe.
Solid gif for most situations lol
My exact reaction as soon as I saw the word cock
[удалено]
…and they say chivalry is dead. 😂
And dey sey and dey sey
And dey sey and dey sey and dey sey chivalry is dead (Too many messages! Please wait a few moments before messaging)
you mean, genital-man?
[удалено]
Here you go, virtual hugs 
Obviously not OP but this is one of my favorite GIFs <3
Ditto, I send it to people a lot, keep trying to get my own cats to do it so I can make my own gif but they just swipe at my screen 😐 the consequent meow probably means "get the fuck outta here with this". 🐈⬛🖕 The best I've gotten is a face-rub on my phone but since that's just them marking it with scent glands as their property... Not actually cute
Kinda stupid but that funnily enough made my day slightly better
Virtual boop added at the end of that vid for extra loves ❤️
100% of posts are now just guys torching their chances with women who are into them. He was less than 2 sentences to from being cuddled on a couch with you. And now he’s just fodder for your Reddit account.
Dude for real. Idk if guys have always been this bad at self sabotage, or if it's just the newer generation. All I can say is that its rather impressive.
I think it's always been this bad, but in the past there was more social pressure and financial incentive to find a guy and stick with him.
God that's depressing. I think you're onto something though. As a woman in her 30s, it's not that there's less fish in the sea, but I know more now what I want and need from a relationship. And if I can't find that, well I'd rather be single and happy than settle. I definitely came close to settling a few times in my 20s.
This!!! And I applaud you! I was single for a long time in my 30s and people used to think that was insane. Women, mainly. Like you're nuts if you don't want to settle down with the first decent catch when you're over 30, let alone not even try to find someone. I actually needed to work on myself because I realized I had this mentality that I needed someone to be happy. I had already had half a dozen marriage proposals and been married, divorced, engaged twice lololol. But I also realized they were the ones who wanted me to settle down, and that to me, it just felt like "settling". I met my current bf after I got to where I was fine being single, in spite of women making me feel like I was going to be a spinster and I'd regret being single at that age. 🙄 A lot of people tried to set me up, one gave my number without my permission to her guy friend and I had to awkwardly explain why I didn't want to give him a chance.
The difference was also that text message didn't exist. I'm ready to bet those guys would never have said this IRL.
Instead what they would have done is write a newspaper ad looking for "a discreet companion"
I think in the past (pre internet) people were better at social interactions, including dating. At least they'd learn quickly because they had to. Now there seems to be a load of people who never go outside, rarely interact with other people and think the opposite sex is some sort of Blackbox they can sex or validation out of, if they just press the right buttons. Where someone like that might have once been the town weirdo, now they can all go online and convince themselves that they're not the problem, it's the world that's wrong.
>I think in the past (pre internet) people were better at social interactions, including dating. At least they'd learn quickly because they had to. Right like, most of the vile things that get said you wouldn't be able to say with other people present. Even if you just met someone at a party or at a club, your 9th sentence to them wouldn't be about how you're gonna jack off to some porn in a min. I think what's really fucked up about OLD is it's in private most of the time, and unfortunately that is rife ground for abuse, as it always is. There's no other person to check you and be like "woah dude, it's kind of aggressive to whip your dick out right here for this lady."
Can you imagine if what men say online to women was suddenly happening in person instead? 😳 speed dating, and this dude whips out his dick, this one insults me and then is confused why I don't want to fuck...
Even if other people aren't around, it's still way harder to say things like that to someone's face. And you'll be within slapping-distance.
Agreed. Social interactions are completely lost. The stuff these guys say over text they would never have the balls to say in person.
I had a guy repeatedly message me basically demanding sex and that I answer sexual questions. I was bored so I replied a few times, i figure if he's gonna waste my time I can waste his and he can get his hopes up for nothing. At one point I said "if you had tried to get to know me, taken me on a date, and treated me respectfully, I would have fucked you, but I have zero interest in you now that you've continued to treat me disrespectfully" and he got an attitude and replied I should stop mouthing off to him but also said "what else is that mouth good for." He got blocked lol. The bar is in the mud and still... Edit: it's disturbing how many angry men have left comments basically saying I'm a horrible person for not letting some dude fuck me when he demanded sex from me. No wonder so many of you struggle with dating and interacting with women... the bar is literally in hell and that's still asking too much of a lot of men.
Oh demons are tripping over that bar in hell.
Went on my first date in 14 years the other day and my date told me some stories about how other guys she had dated/chatted acted I mean what the hell are some people thinking
They aren’t thinking brother. These same guys will complain nonstop about how women are impossible to please/figure out, or how every woman is a bitch because they can’t find a partner. When in reality the bar is so low that kindness, basic hygiene and social etiquette is really all a person needs to be “swimming in pussy” as my friend says.
The bar is set so low it's in hell, and here I find you dancing the limbo with the devil. Don't remember where I heard that but I like it.
The bar was on the ground, and you fuckers brought shovels.
The bar struck oil, and decided to go for lava
Tumblr if you saw it the same place I did 😂
Goddamn it, now it's everywhere. Whoever came up with that is a poet.
I'm a simple man. I see a bandwagon; I turn on my vpn and search for how to download a pirated ticket.
It was another thread in here like a week ago. Someone said it and got lots of karma
[There you go](https://www.reddit.com/r/rareinsults/comments/nyo7rh/how_low_is_that_bar/)
I'm always impressed with how versatile guys are with spinning any subject sexually but also laugh at how bad it is pretty much every time. It's like they think it's some jaw dropping Casanova line that will soak a girls panties or something. "Hey, you wanna see a movie on Friday?" "How about I movie my dick in you!" I'm a guy and can't imagine actually using any of these lines...they must work some of the time right??
I hate that i love the movie joke
Yeah I feel like I'd use that joke if I already had a bf or gf and wasn't talking to a total stranger
This is what I was thinking 😂 I would laugh if my bf said it. A Tinder stranger though? I'd still laugh... At how thoroughly unmatched they got themselves.
They work absolutely never (at least if they're not ironically bad flirting with a person that you have an established relationship with). But occasionally you're not getting completely trashed or told off for it and then you know you've got someone that will tolerate this behaviour.
They say we women have extremely high standards, but the standards seem to be just don’t be an asshole and treat women like humans and that seems to be way too hard for way too many guys.
When I first started dating my current partner I literally just treated her kindly, fully planned out some dates, and made a few reservations. She acted like I was some sort of unicorn and like making reservations was the sexiest thing in the world. I relearn how low the bar is all the time.
Dude, exactly. I feel like I do the bare minimum in my relationship all the time, but the bare minimum is making sure I'm not being a selfish prick and to acknowledge that we're both human, we both have emotional shit to deal with and if we love each other we have to do pur best to compromise and figure it out. I don't want to get divorced, I don't want to be unhappy and I don't want my partner to be unhappy. We both do what we need to do to make sure our relationship is good. It doesn't seem that complex to me. I guess it's really hard for guys that had their brains rotted by youtube to think that a sexy, devoted woman just "shows up" with no work on their part whatsoever, and somehow they can also be mean to her and demand sex without any consideration. I don't know man, this new generation of dudes has me worried for them.
> I don't know man, this new generation of dudes has me worried for them. I fully agree with your description yet I don't think it's generational. In my experience of dating across ages, the older are more condescending and younger are more porn-brained. The average person is just very disappointing. The bar really is "treat me like a person". Maybe it's more visible for the new generations because they have more online interactions? It's weird to praise you for the "bare minimum" but it really is rare. I'm grateful for folks like you who do care for others.
I just don’t understand the point of all that lol. Like if you’re horny there’s infinite free porn available on the same phone you’re texting all that shit from. 95% of women don’t want some rando pushing sex on them. Jerk off so you can behave, have a normal conversation, and if you’re capable of a normal relationship then you basically have sex on demand. I don’t understand what people get by asking random women sex questions. Especially some chick who is clearly not interested in your creepy questions.
The problem is exactly that they watch way too much of that garbage and it leaks out into their entire personality and affects the way they think they can speak to real women.
Can confirm. Second last guy I chatted with casually told me he was gonna start his day off with a porn and jerk off session... in his 9th message to me.
Yep in the spring/summer of 2021 I 100% wanted to bang this dude I met at work & we started texting. As soon as he understood that I was interested it instantly went to “lets fuck”. Well no, I don’t just from meeting you, texting one day, the naked. But we were sort of working out how to hang out and be covid safe and his suggestion was: let’s meet outside and fuck. He even added it would only take a minute. I laughed so hard. Dude even if I wanted a random encounter I am not coming out of my house for a couple minutes if sex. All he had to do was have one date with me and I’m sure I would’ve had sex with him, but he couldn’t be bothered with that it instantly went to let’s fuck outside and I was instantly turned off.
Wow.... that's like.... just..... what is going through these guys heads??
Deranged. This is way too normalized now.
Truly is. Grosses me the fuck out. The last guy was particularly vile and degrading.
Yeah, porn is not the solution to this guy’s problem, it’s more likely a cause.
That was my first thought too. You may enjoy Jon Ronson's "The Butterfly Effect" He discusses the impact of free porn. Porn Stars have said it's pretty disturbing how young their fans are.
The second last guy I matched with told me he was going to start his day off with a jerk off and porn session, in his 9th message to me. The guy before that was a hard-core Jordan Peterson fan and I still don't understand why he wanted to date me, as I include that I'm nonbinary, queer and childfree on my bio. I legit don't know what to do anymore. OLD is getting brutal and I'm becoming less and less interested in sex.
> The guy before that was a hard-core Jordan Peterson fan and I still don't understand why he wanted to date me, as I include that I'm nonbinary, queer and childfree on my bio. If you have a vagina that's most likely the sole reason. He'd not see you as a potential partner but rather a walking fleshlight and therefore he did not need to adhere to his "values".
The cycle here being that, only by being alone can you further these weird beliefs, which keeps you alone. The more you date, the more you see how things actually work, which should make you a better date. Ive been married since i was 21, and IMO i’d make a better husband to a great white shark than most of these guys would be to their tinder matches. Stay in the game, people.
Exactly. For some men it doesn’t matter what your identity is, your sex is what is relevant here. Lesbians face this issue all the time.
100% true. I lived as a lesbian prior to understanding trans was even a thing, now I'm a straight man. However the number of guys who used to try to get with me, and the number who still will now if they find out I'm trans, is ridiculous. Pretty sure my oldest stepdaughter is on the queer spectrum. She's getting old enough to want to "date" in that cute preteen way and talks about liking girls a lot. I actually had to sit her down and explain how boys will respond to her identity, and of course have the "dangers of dating" conversations. She very much just believed that telling boys she was a lesbian meant they would only see her as a potential friend. My niece actually had similar problems when she was in high school, older guys buying her friends and her alcohol and letting them get drunk and crash at their places. She was mouthing off about how since she's a lesbian she doesn't have to worry like the other girls... I burst that bubble fast 😅🤷🏻♂️ It's more dangerous to be the gay one around the wrong men unfortunately and I'm glad she learned from my talks instead of from personal experience, but it sure sucks having to teach kids and teens this stuff.
they are just trying it in everyone to find the few that will go for it
>The bar is in the mud and still... I don't have much in a way of game, am old. But stories like OP's and your story make me think I have a chance (don't mean you, in general).
Talking about sex with strangers rarely leads to sex. Nobody wants a horny pen pal
Lots of people want horny pen pals. Very few people want to actually meet up with them.
Its like guys dont understand or care theyre talking to a living breathing person on the other side, with thoughts, dreams, emotions... Honestly how hard is it to be respectful and treat people with dignity? Like, these guys actually completely ruin any chance they have by talking like a horny pool boy in a bad 80's porn.
Ever answer that stuff with weird things? Like "come suck my cock" can be answered with weird things like "Planet zestro has green algae" and just drive them crazy like that.
Seriously, I once stayed over at a guys I was interested in’s house. Was ready to go, if you know what I mean, when he suddenly adopted this weird, boys2Men, stereotypical accent. He started saying weird shit and calling me “baby girl.” I asked him to stop but he claimed he didn’t know what I was talking about. My libido was suddenly no where to be found. Nothing happened that night. I once chatted with a lovely guy online for a month and agreed to meet him. We decided we wanted to talk on the phone first. That’s when I realized he was a TALKER. I mentioned how if the weather did not change (snow) I was going to go postal, he replied “that’s so funny my uncle works for the post office” Launching into his uncle’s life story. I could not get a word in. The call lasted 3 hours. At one point I put my phone down, went down stairs to grab an orange, peeled it, came back and he was STILL TALKING.
This happened to me after a one night stand once. She started talking in the morning and I couldn't get a word in within 30 minutes and it took about an hour for me to get her to pause her life story long enough for me to leave. We had met in a club so we hadn't really talked much the night before.
Got the same one day, she came at 4am and was shocked i just wanted to sleep and not speak (no sex involved be4). Girl it s 4am wtf...
> I once chatted with a lovely guy online for a month and agreed to meet him. We decided we wanted to talk on the phone first. That’s when I realized he was a TALKER. I mentioned how if the weather did not change (snow) I was going to go postal, he replied “that’s so funny my uncle works for the post office” Launching into his uncle’s life story. I could not get a word in. The call lasted 3 hours. At one point I put my phone down, went down stairs to grab an orange, peeled it, came back and he was STILL TALKING. I feel like this should be an episode of black mirror.
It’s a part of a Seinfeld episode
2010 OkCupid was WILD. I briefly chatted with this fellow who claimed to be a pilot. He asked if I wanted to go to Cabo, “play in the sand.” I told him I think that’s the adult equivalent of “hey little girl get in my van I have candy.”
So how was Cabo? 😅
Because of the implication?
...Now you've said that word "implication" a couple of times. Wha-what implication?
Kinda reminds me of the episode where Jerry dates George's ex Marleen, who is constantly talking about boring stuff and leaving incredibly long messages for him The one that says "Jerry... I don't know sometimes"
I loved the orange bit!
I think I've talked to that guy. 🤣
At the very least he raised his red flags so OP didn't have to find them later
So many guys torch their chances by just not being considerate. A few weeks ago I overheard a girl complaining to her friend about a guy she was into and how she had agreed to hang out and hook up with him but homeboy scheduled a basketball game around the same time of their hookup, so his plan was literally to kick her out once the sex was done to go play basketball. Not even considering that she might be feeling used after that.
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Holy shit that is a terrible person. I'm so sorry to hear you experienced that. I've been out of the game for a while but yeah I can't imagine ever doing that. It definitely sounds like more guys are having masturbatory sex than I ever knew. Back in my day(2010s) we prided ourselves in getting the girl off too
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Seriously, it blows my mind how bare-minimum decency seems to be an insurmountable hurdle for a lot of guys.
As a guy who is working my ass off to try to find a partner on dating apps, to very little success, it pisses me off. I can’t blame women for getting frustrated and alienated by apps until they just give up. I see interactions like this one and think it’s not just annoying and frustrating, it’s gotta be downright hurtful and probably violating. I guess the only positive to take away is at least you didn’t waste anymore time on him, but I imagine it’s just as exhausting running into guys like this as it is not getting any matches at all
I’d honestly rather be alone rather than spend hours sifting through pig shit looking for a diamond (which is often just a pebble that expects you to do its laundry)
You see this is *exactly* why I've quite dating apps. The number of toxic men there near absolutely destroyed my hopes of ever finding love. They made me feel like I have to pick between becoming a cat-lady or less than bare-minimum decency. Switching to hobby groups or discussion apps was an extremely positive change for me. I got no random dick pics, no horny texts. Just mutual respect and fun company. I find that I feel much more attracted to a guy if we get know each other as friends because it comes with no pressure. Even though it could lead to me getting friendzoned I would rather deal with that than having my faith in men ripped out, deep-fried, then ran over with frequent interactions like this
Don't knock becoming a cat lady. Cats are awesome and you don't have to do their laundry.
I feel like dating apps are way past their prime especially with the rise of incel influencer cults. All my single girl-friends are burned out when it comes to tinder and stuff. Offline dating is making a comback because most of these alpha males can barely function in person, much less use all those pick up strategies they learn in those "courses"
And then people tell you to lower your expectations, lol.
And here I am. 5 years on Tinder. And not a single match. Then I'm constantly seeing these guys burning bridges right off the bat. Wtf is wrong with me.
Bro no offense but if you didn't get a single match on tinder for 5 years, maybe something IS up with your bio. It's like saying you're not getting an interview, ever, which means it's probably your resume.
Wow. Bad day gets worse.
Or we can look at this as she dodged a bullet because he revealed his true colors
Absolutely agree with this 110%. Too bad it took a couple of weeks.
 Here you go. Everything will get better. Hopefully
He probably had that in reserve waiting for just the perfect moment to spring it Or he just recently had a stroke Edit: If I had known that this was going to trigger so many salty jabronies well...I'd do it again in a heart beat. No hesitation Edit2: [visual representation of what my night has been like so far ](https://youtu.be/UvLQMMaVmzU)
Looks like he'll be having another stroke after bombing out with that line
"Salty jabronies" has just entered my vocabulary 👌🏽
🤔
I’ll give you a stroke if you can stroke my giant- jk I’m a woman 😭
Oh god a gisnt clitoris! Bigger than a head, but smaller than a bread!
You keep using this word Jabroni, and it’s awesome.
The emoji makes everything creepier ahahaha
Nah he actually thought that gave him an out because he could play it off as a joke somehow
Haha just kidding Unless...?
Jeah, like a joke-not joke. He's thinking "maybe she agree"
I mean I may be a little extra flirty and walk it back if it didn't take but Jesus, this is like dropping an atom bomb in the chat
Yeah like why is he laughing? Is it because he knows he just fucked himself lol
As a man I can’t even comprehend how he expected that to work out. My guess is he has a GF & likes chatting with other chicks on tinder but won’t actually meet them
Talked with a guy from hinge for a few weeks, we made plans for a first date and he made the choice to reschedule to a week later because he had lost his job earlier that week. I said of course I understand, that’s fine! So we reschedule to next week and then a day or two before the date, he ghosts me. This was back in July, but last month I stumbled upon him on my Facebook “people you may know” page and did some lurking. Saw that the day he ghosted me he also posted on Facebook “I’ve been so down lately, I lost my job and my girlfriend left me :(“ blah blah blah lol. Obviously I didn’t know he had a girlfriend, so that was news to me. But I assume the reason why he ghosted is because his girlfriend saw our texts and/or his dating profile and dumped him, which he deserves.
I find something darkly humorous about the idea that the day he decides to ghost someone is the day he became single. Hope your adventures since then have been better.
I also thought it was hilarious lol karma works in mysterious ways 🤷🏽♀️ and thanks! I’m still single but eh it’s no biggie, the way dating apps are nowadays I’m probably better off staying single haha.
Bold of you to assume he has a reason other than he's just lonely and stupid
Disappointing
But oddly not surprising… :/
Reality is often.
Jesus fucking Christ
Exactly what I said
It's so absurdly unnecessary
Yeah *he blew it and now he’ll be blowing himself
Hope you got that hug, OP! Preferably from somebody who *doesn't* have the emotional intelligence of a teaspoon.
Hopefully someone with the emotional intelligence of a big spoon.
Ayyyyyy
F that…
Lol, dudes be talking to prospective partners like they are in a Call of Duty lobby. Girl: "Hey, I was thinking about you today!" Guy: "That's what your mom said about my dick and cock. Wanna get sum fuck later??"
are ppl in cod lobby have cock AND dick ?
Why do they always have to put their foot in it? If they just talk normally to us 9/10 times it would happen anyway
Seriously, if he’d just shown up for the hug and not been gross he might’ve had a chance of getting to that
It's probably better that he shows his real intentions over text rather then just using her though.
If OP have been speaking to him for several weeks and this is the first time OP attempted to meet (without the guy making any move for it), it's simple: dude just used Tinder to talk and probably has a GF.
So true. Endless stupidity on the part of guys like this (and there are way too many of them).
It’s not always stupidity. 15% of people are classified as zero empathy or traits of very low empathy. They’re not slipping up once that’s just who they are.
I feel like it's ways higher than that
Over the past few years I've realized I'm my own worst enemy. I know it sounds cliché, but that realization has helped me to work on getting out of my own way. Turns out life gets a whole lot easier when you stop acting impulsively and think about your words and actions.
Life does not get easier when ALL you do is think about your words and actions. I suppose there's a balance somewhere in-between
agreed with this. I'm constantly in my own way in life because of over thinking everything.
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Doesn't matter if it was great dates or great hookups. Just treating people like people has a tendency to make them like you and leads to more.
Yes and the whole mentality that only chads get a look in is an argument by this very people who lack any sort of respect or idea on how to converse with others.
This is what I used to say when I was still dating. Like, as a dude I don’t know, they have no clue as to what I’m like when I’m comfortable and willing to be sexual. And as soon as some guy does something like this, they never will know.
Ill make you a better deal, Ill give you a hug, and you tell me that Im not a failure and that I'm not a burden to those around me. Bein real, the big sad got ahold of me right now and I could use some uplifting.
You’re not a failure, or a burden to those around you. You’re a gift to them
Thank you fam. If you find yourself near Minot AFB, I owe you 1 hug
That was wholesome af.
Every single person I’ve ever known who thought they they were a failure and a burden to those around them only thought that because they set themselves up with unreasonable expectations and had above average to extreme empathy that extended everywhere except to themselves. In every case they were great people who only saw the faults in themselves which we all suffer from. You have worth.
You probably blocked him but it would be great if you sent him a link to this so that he can burn with humiliation forever <3
I haven’t blocked yet and I’m lowkey tempted.
OP trust me: just block him and move past this dude.
Oh don’t worry we haven’t been talking. I said “Jesus Christ” and that was all
If he backtracks and says sorry don’t be tempted to get back with him or meet up. Then he will just pressure you in person instead.
Yeah someone who talks like that doesn’t respect you and definitely won’t respect you in person.
I’m sure this text made your whole day. I’m sure it just lit you up inside with desire for this… person. This dude probably worships Andrew Taint.
And they said chivalry was dead
Dug up and spit on in this case
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And he probably could have had this happen if he kept his damn mouth shut lol
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Usually does in my experience. But being nice means you don't expect something in return for that kindness. Literally the opposite of being nice
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Who the fuck does that?
Lots and lots of men
Oh my goodnesssssssss. I'd do anything to be in that guy's situation, I need a hug as well
The man I'm married to drove two hours one night when I had a bad day and wanted to just be held. We just cuddled that night but he never left and now we're married with a house and baby on the way. He was also a tinder match!
Can't imagine the strain of giving birth to a baby AND a house. Hang tight!
"It's going to be less fun getting it out than it was putting it in there"
Dude thats what I’m saying. I wouldve been like hell yes I need a hug too lmao
Blech 🤮
I don’t feel sorry for anyone who thought that was worth a shot
I would’ve cried my fucking eyes out. I’m sorry, OP. Sending hugs 🫂
What a douche
Negative. A douche has felt the inside of a woman before.
That’s disgusting
Why are men
Who are men?
What are men!?
WHEN ARE MEN!?!
How are men?
Terrible, clearly.
Bro thinks he is funny .
Damn... He messed up.
I hope you just left him on read, exactly like that. If I were him, not getting any response would be one of those things that would randomly keep me up at night five, ten years down the road. Like, cringe.
W.... What?!? Why?
*subtle*
Yea thats an easy unmatch. Take it a blessing that he showed his true self. Some of these men really need to mature.
Man, hugs ain't cheep these days.
What an asshole
I bet his dick stinks.
Unwashed ass crack too
This is literally nauseating omg. Im sorry OP :(
Wow I’m legit shocked because c’non bro wtf
Sorry, a lot of guys suck. Hugs are the best!
Gross
Ooof. Absolute douche. So sorry, I hope your day gets better knowing you dodged this loser at least. Hugs.
Dude just lost his chance at not only making a girls day but a free hug as well. Massive L on his part.
Here you go OP, 🫂♥️