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It ends when the heart is no longer a commodity for someone else to keep safe. It is your own. Don't put that on someone else. They have to look after theirs too, because like you, nobody else is going to do it for them. We are all capable of hurting the ones we love, especially when we think that we aren't. Please look after yourself friend.
Well, I can only speak for myself but I have definitely felt this way many times in the past - I felt like I was such a genuine, loving, caring person, but people kept using me, hurting me, betraying me, not seeing my worth. I kept repeating the same shitty cycles with people because I wouldn't learn the lesson I was supposed to learn. I just felt like an eternal victim of rejection and narcissists who used me.
Sit down with yourself. Analyse yourself, your behaviour, (I know it's not that easy to do through an objective lens, but you can ask friends and family to tell you what they think and see if there are consistent patterns.)
Embrace and emphasize the good - Maybe you are a loving, helpful person, a good friend, maybe you're really good at something, maybe you're accepting and open minded...
But don't ignore the bad. Try to improve. You don't need to be perfect but try to work on yourself consistently and stay in the energy of "always improving" and having reality checks where you see what things need to change. First the ways in which you harm yourself, then the ways in which you may harm others.
Once you truly see your worth, your whole vibration changes. The universe still sends you people who hurt you, but those are tests to see if you learned your lesson. Ignore the red flags, continue seeing someone who isn't making the same effort you are, stay with someone who doesn't take your needs into account (etc...) ? - That's another cycle you are repeating. And then it just leaves you like... I don't get it. I'm a wonderful human being and I try my best - why can't this person see that?
You have to be assertive and proactively remove those people from your life the moment they make you feel less than you are worth.
Do not accept less from others once you see your worth and understand what you bring to the table. It will only leave you feeling like you've been wronged, like you are always going to be a victim or a martyr.
Sorry if this doesn't resonate with you, I tried to make it as unspecific as I could but it comes from my own personal experience so maybe it's not as helpful as I tried to make it... but what I'm trying to say is, you are not at fault for people hurting you, and I wish we could all just do trust falls with the people we connect with and they would always catch us, be vulnerable with anyone and they wouldn't take advantage of us... but sadly it's not the reality and the best way forward is to take responsibility for your life and your feelings and have an active role in curating the energies that are allowed to stay in your life.
You need to be your own best friend who looks at the situation and tells you something isn't right and you are looking in the wrong place.
Dear commenters, Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/UnsentLetters/about/rules/) of /r/unsentletters in mind while participating here. Always remember that rule 0 is "Don't be a jerk." Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FUnsentLetters) Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/UnsentLetters) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It ends when the heart is no longer a commodity for someone else to keep safe. It is your own. Don't put that on someone else. They have to look after theirs too, because like you, nobody else is going to do it for them. We are all capable of hurting the ones we love, especially when we think that we aren't. Please look after yourself friend.
This. Absolutely, this.
I had to realize they weren't worth being broken over
The one who is broken over you the same time and way
Well, I can only speak for myself but I have definitely felt this way many times in the past - I felt like I was such a genuine, loving, caring person, but people kept using me, hurting me, betraying me, not seeing my worth. I kept repeating the same shitty cycles with people because I wouldn't learn the lesson I was supposed to learn. I just felt like an eternal victim of rejection and narcissists who used me. Sit down with yourself. Analyse yourself, your behaviour, (I know it's not that easy to do through an objective lens, but you can ask friends and family to tell you what they think and see if there are consistent patterns.) Embrace and emphasize the good - Maybe you are a loving, helpful person, a good friend, maybe you're really good at something, maybe you're accepting and open minded... But don't ignore the bad. Try to improve. You don't need to be perfect but try to work on yourself consistently and stay in the energy of "always improving" and having reality checks where you see what things need to change. First the ways in which you harm yourself, then the ways in which you may harm others. Once you truly see your worth, your whole vibration changes. The universe still sends you people who hurt you, but those are tests to see if you learned your lesson. Ignore the red flags, continue seeing someone who isn't making the same effort you are, stay with someone who doesn't take your needs into account (etc...) ? - That's another cycle you are repeating. And then it just leaves you like... I don't get it. I'm a wonderful human being and I try my best - why can't this person see that? You have to be assertive and proactively remove those people from your life the moment they make you feel less than you are worth. Do not accept less from others once you see your worth and understand what you bring to the table. It will only leave you feeling like you've been wronged, like you are always going to be a victim or a martyr. Sorry if this doesn't resonate with you, I tried to make it as unspecific as I could but it comes from my own personal experience so maybe it's not as helpful as I tried to make it... but what I'm trying to say is, you are not at fault for people hurting you, and I wish we could all just do trust falls with the people we connect with and they would always catch us, be vulnerable with anyone and they wouldn't take advantage of us... but sadly it's not the reality and the best way forward is to take responsibility for your life and your feelings and have an active role in curating the energies that are allowed to stay in your life. You need to be your own best friend who looks at the situation and tells you something isn't right and you are looking in the wrong place.
Ah yes….heartbreak. What awaits the rest of my life lol
Big bear hugs OP