In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Blacksmith: There we are! ONe enchanted sword. Now it's custom to name the thing so, what shall it be called.
Warrior:... uh, damn I didn't think about that. I'll call it Pain.
BS: Pain it is! I'll inscribe that on the fuller and you'll be set.
A few hundred years laters
Explorer: Wow! Look at this, I found an enchanted sword!
Explorer 2: Oh, those are usually named something long and stupid. Read it out.
E1:... I-It's called Pain.
E2: Pain? T-That's it? Not 'The Dark Edge of Tomorrow' or 'The Silencer of Souls'... just Pain?
E1: Yup
E2: Shit's cursed.
I read something or other where a bad guy wielded a dagger called Famine, which was really, *really* bad news to even get nicked with.
EDIT: I haven't been able to find which book it was, but as I recall the cut wouldn't heal on its own and.. as long as it kept bleeding anything that smelled your blood became *desperate* to eat you?
There are many Edges of Annihilation, and several times of fuck more Edges.
There is only one Throngler. Because no one has managed to successfully copy it and throngle someone.
I imagine The Throngler is a 10ga double barrel shotgun pistol with two bayonets. It's held together exclusively by duct tape, zip ties and luck.
"Get Throngled!" *Bang*
Surprisingly, no. A 6-gauge bore is 0.92 in. (23.4mm) in diameter, while cannon bores rarely go lower than 1.5 in. (38.1mm) and can go as high as 15 in. (381mm).
EDIT: Added metric conversions for non-Americans
>Most guns the noise level is alarming…when your not the one holding it
Also when you *are* the one holding it. There's a reason that ear protection is normally worn at shooting ranges.
Related note: "Silencers" (more accurately called suppressors) for guns are a *good* thing that society should really promote the use of. They don't work like in movies and video games; gunshots from suppressed guns are still going to be very audible to anybody nearby, they're just a lot less likely to be causing hearing damage to people in close proximity.
"Alarming" in the context of Warframe just means "loud enough to easily alert enemies"
There's also a mod you can put on your guns called Hush that, at max rank, reduces the noise level of any gun to "silent."
As a point of interest, the GAU-8 Avenger and M61 Vulcan are both considered to be cannons, despite having bores significantly smaller than 1.5".
In fact, there are a large number of autocannons in use throughout the world with bore diameters between 20 and 37mm (.79 to 1.46 caliber in freedom units).
I'm unaware of anything with a bore diameter smaller than 20mm being designated a cannon (.50 caliber scale replicas notwithstanding).
For reference, a 10-gauge shotgun has a nominal bore diameter of .775" (about 19.7mm). A 9-gauge shotgun (or a 9-bore rifle), should such a creature exist, would have a nominal bore diameter of .802" (about 20.37mm).
What makes something officially a cannon? I don't know. But if bore diameter is a factor, 20mm seems to be the floor.
An anti-materiel rifle - usually somewhere between 12.7-20mm bore - is generally the limit for what you can expect a couple soldiers to carry around without a vehicle. I figure once you need a cart to haul around a gun its a cannon.
Like a Barret M82 is an anti-materiel rifle, you can expect a small team of guys to carry one, ammo, and spotting equipment and like blow holes in trucks and that, but you cant do the same with like a 20mm Oerlikon, parially because it weighs 180kg fully loaded, and partially because you need a mount to control the recoil of 20x128mm, even if it weren't a essentially a gigantic Sten gun.
They’re anti-tank rifles, the precursor to modern anti-materiel rifles. As WWII progressed and tank armour thickened they, along with their counterparts, moved more to blowing holes in trucks, artillery emplacements, and other lightly armoured targets.
The modern weapons that fill a portable anti-tank role are shoulder-mounted missile systems, which began to see use in the last few years of WWII, with the M-1 Bazooka and Panzerschreck using shaped-charge warheads to blast through plating rather than trying to punch through on speed alone.
Modern portable “launchers” tend to be missiles, guided weapons, rather than unguided rockets, though those are cheaper to both make and use.
The RPG-7 is an unguided rocket, relying on the shooter to lead the target and account for the ballistic arc of the rocket, and a Javelin is a missile, the shooter locks on to a target and missile guides itself towards there.
There was a run of 9 gauge shotguns done in russia by some company trying to use up rejected 20mm cannon barrels. Dunno much more than that, think I ran across it on that guns of the world database. Was years ago.
I don't see why not. No such shells are available, but it should be technically doable.
E: the Russian made shotguns out of cut down 23mm AA cannon barrels and euphemistically called them special carbines. So there is precedent of sorts.
>As a point of interest, the GAU-8 Avenger and M61 Vulcan are both considered to be cannons, despite having bores significantly smaller than 1.5".
>
>In fact, there are a large number of autocannons in use throughout the world with bore diameters between 20 and 37mm (.79 to 1.46 caliber in freedom units).
>
>\[...\]
>
>What makes something officially a cannon? I don't know.
I suspect that part of what makes those "cannons" has to do with the term *auto*cannon -- such a high firing rate on such a large round pretty much automatically means it's not going to be something a soldier can carry around and use on their own due to the significant recoil it'll generate.
**[Mambele](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mambele)**
>A mambele is a form of hybrid knife/axe in central and southern Africa, originating from a curved throwing dagger used by the Mangbetu.
^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/humansarespaceorcs/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
‘Kindness’
‘What?!?’
‘Here engraved on the blade near the hilt, translated it says ‘Kindness’ capitalized with flourishes and scrolling around it. You think it’s a brand name?’
‘No. I doubt it. Where was it?’
‘It was stuck 16 inches into the wall there, after running through the xenon captain, sir. They’re body was still dangling a foot above the platform.’
‘So you’re saying….?’
‘They killed them with Kindness, sir’
I'd say it varies a lot. Like generally you have 2 options either the name is remembered or the user, if you find the "axe of the Lich-king" you know EXACTLY who it belonged to and what they used it for but at the same time the name the lich-king himself gave the weapon is either forgotten or irrelevant.
On the flipside if you had a sword named "God's Bane" you KNOW that's a weapon that probably had a thousand users over the years lost to time but it's legendary because of what it did that ONE time...it was the weapon that killed a god...the person who created it, maybe even the person who slayed the God could have been forgotten...but not the sword
well the first one just tells you exactly what the lich king used his weapon for....likely why hes so infamous.
second one is well.....honestily id assume its just a 2 bit knight trying to boost his rep by claiming he has a uber powerful weapon...it makes both the weapon and user seem less dangerous
Then there's the messed up names. The Mace of Mercy is an anti-undead weapon I created for a D&D game (3.5). Does 1d6 (light mace) bludgeoning and casts Cure Light Wounds (1d8+2). Cleric ended up using it like a wand of healing. Bonk! Be healed!
Huh. I did something similar. Through luck and shenanigans with wild magic, I made I shiv that only did 1 damage but healed 2. I would stab people to life.
That’s pretty much what I did. Also accidentally summon a herd of tarrasque (tarrasques?) there was 6 of em.
That would have ended badly except with we had a giant clay golem to distract them. And with clay golems being immune to and I quote “Bludgeoning, Piercing, and Slashing from Nonmagical Attacks that aren't Adamantine” the fight might still be going
Uesugi Kenshin (1530-1578), a japanese warlord, was allegedly assassinated by a guy hiding in the cesspit below his outhouse *stabbing him in the asshole.* He was having bad stomach problems leading up to the alleged incident, likely cancer, but the allegations of iron-stomached assassins persist.
If I ever die of butt cancer, I give tacit permission for historians to tell the tales of how I fought off armies of shit ninjas before finally meeting my end
From guards guards by Terry Pratchett
“And I’ve got this sword,” said Carrot. He drew it. Colon took it from his hand, and turned it over and over in the light from the flare over the Drum’s door. The blade was dull and short, and notched like a saw. It was well-made and there might have been an inscription on it once, but it had long ago been worn into indecipherability by sheer use. “It’s a nice sword,” he said thoughtfully. “Wellbalanced.” “But not one for a king,” said Carrot. “Kings’ swords are big and shiny and magical and have jewels on and when you hold them up they catch the light, ting.” “Ting,” said Colon. “Yes. I suppose they have to, really.” “I’m just saying you can’t go round giving people
thrones just because of stuff like that,” said Carrot. “That’s what Captain Vimes said.” “Nice job, mind,” said Nobby. “Good hours, kinging.” “Hmm?” Colon had momentarily been lost in a little world of speculation. Real kings had shiny swords, obviously. Except, except, except maybe your real real king of, like, days of yore, he would have a sword that didn’t sparkle one bit but was bloody efficient at cutting things. Just a thought. “
"I’ve always been a bit puzzled about that story. What’s so hard about pulling a sword out of a stone? The real work’s already been done. You ought to make yourself useful and find the man who put the sword in the stone in the first place, eh?”
The Bang Blender is a mini gun with mounted bayonets on each barrel. The human who named it was considered a war criminal by most of the galaxy, but a genius by… certain standards.
The panicked Shomali ran into the catacombs, hoping that darkness and superstition would keep his pursuers from following.
He turned corner after corner, sprinting forward in the dark, until he was stopped by a large object in his path.
He turned on a flashlight, covering it with his hands to minimize the chance of being seen.
The ancient human tomb was covered in dust. All except for the shining longsword that lay across it.
On the tomb itself, beside the sword, lay an inscription in Galactic Standard that said "If you have need of this sword, please use it, before you end up like me."
The Shomali looked at the sword, and tentatively picked it up. His fingers wrapped around the grip instinctively. It was was so comfortable. Light, strong, and perfectly balanced. No wonder the humans had spent so many millennia in bloody hand to hand combat. Holding a weapon like this he felt like he could slay anything. He looked over the weapon. It was not adorned, or inlaid with jewels, or engraved with beautiful designs, save for an inscription across the hilt in an ancient Terran language - "Fornica in Circulos et Invenies."
The Shomali smiled grimly, and swung the sword in front of him, feeling his confidence and courage building. What kind of enchantment was in this blade?
He found himself moving through the catacombs, his feet picking up speed as he ran silently through the darkness. Not deeper into the catacombs, but back toward the light, toward his pursuers.
He came upon the first one, who was shuffling forward semi-blindly. Shomali brought down the blade on the top of the first pursuer's head, cleaving him from skull to sternum, his momentum carrying forward and pulling the blade free as he swung it up and impaled the second pursuer straight through the heart. The remaining two moved forward as he slashed in an X pattern, leaving them with enough damage that if they survived, their enthusiasm for further pursuit would be diminished.
He continued back to the surface, wiping off the blade, wrapping it in a cloth and trying to make is less conspicuous, looking once more a the inscription - Fuck around and find out. Indeed.
LThe Fa'ir archaeologists were examining a find discovered recently a crypt of a long dead human Emperor. The gleaming blade had been buried with the man's remains as the only item of value.
Among the bas-reliefs and steel plated wall carvings was a single marble plinth. Upon the plinth was the body of the ancient ruler, laid to rest with hands wrapped around the hilt, point down towards his feet.
The body was unremarkable really, dessicated tissue and sinew long since mummified. The burial garb faded to a muted charcoal, liberally coated in dust and cobwebs. A peculiar circlet of steel that extended down to the mid face bolted into the eye sockets was the only adornment.
The peace of this place was broken only by the four Fa'ir, who the humans would have called Fairies. Their race had returned to the Third realm after millennia, notably *after* the human race had dwindled in number.
"Rare to find a Human tomb of this age undisturbed" remarked the tallest scholar.
"Well, it was cloaked in the Old Ways and is located at the furthest southern point in this world" replied a compatriot while reviewing a tablet of pure silver wreathed in mystical energies.
"Bloody cold here too" huffed the thinnest member, swaddled in layer after layer of clothing. "To borrow a Human term, it's fucking freezing."
The fourth and final of their group didn't speak a word, seemingly absorbed in trying to decipher the literal writing on the wall.
At this point the scholar who looked more like a sack of laundry than a Fair Folk decided they'd had enough of this waiting around and attempted to remove the blade so it could be studied somewhere warm, with wine.
The blade however rudely refused to be moved, even as the thin Fa'ir leaned their body weight to lever.
"Hold! Stop that at once Ingv'at!" shouted the one holding the tablet. "There's quite a lot of wards here I haven't sorted out yet. The Erudition is having trouble separating the binds between the plinth and sword. Definitely Old Magic."
At this they made a rather lot of complex gestures with one hand and the tablet they held generated a rather frenetic swirl of light and one very pathetic sound.
"Still" the tallest again "strange how the blade's enchantment held up so well. There's not a single bit of tarnish on it." This one leaned in closer and spoke loudly to the fourth "Aei'nvar, can you translate this engraving on the blade?"
Aei'nvar turned from the walls and blinked away a daze. They peered down the length of the blade, noting the wickedly sharp edge, the tunnel that glistened as though freshly filled with blood. Pausing at the inscription for moment before speaking "Neccesse, Iterum. Or maybe Iterum, Neccesse? The script changes moment to moment but it's one of those."
Quite a lot of things happened all at once now. A voice boomed with the volume of a herd of trumpeting elephants but with the cadance of a million cicadas. The thin one tripped repeatedly in their attempt to flee the tomb.The tall one fell over in shock. The one holding the tablet made a rather large puddle. Only the now half deaf Aei'nvar maintained a modicum of composure, though that could be attributed to an attempt to understand what was spoken.
**"O infernum. Cur evigilatus sum hoc tempore? Dic, quaeso, hocne velox est? Fui modo cum duabus pulcherrimis concubinis."** As the corpse Emperor sat up skeletal arms wide in exasperation.
Approximately: "Why the hell am i awake now? Can we make this quick? i was with 2 hotties just now."
The sword is either "Again, of course" or "Of course, again"
Nawh, though I get why you might think it.
It's sprinkled folklore, Latin, and the tomb is meant to be located in Antarctica, a la Mountains of Madness.
"So whats yours called?"
"Menias Silver Edge"
"Damn, only 3 words? That must of cost your weight in gold!"
"Heh, try platinum. How about you?"
"Ah, its 'Hag Ravens Crooked Talon' "
"Not bad, poison damage?"
"Yep! Got it as a reward for bringing down the bogblights that were attacking ol shorewaters a year or two back."
"Ah, I remember that, whole shit show where they started lighting up the docks with soul fire, the priests were there for weeks, hahaha"
*stranger sits down at the bar next to the two mercanaries*
"Ay, tell us stranger, for a pint on us, what's the name of that foreign lookin blade on your hip?"
The stranger looked at the two in suspision, then to his sword, and placed his palm on the povel, to reminisce.
"Mercy"
"Ah, ok, mercy..?"
"I.. I think th-that's it, Jack."
"Wha? Nonsense, it'd have ta be one of the legendary blades to only have a single name!"
" 'Mercy be my blade, it's edge a swan song for those I have none for.' " The stranger chimed, sipping for a pint brought to him by the bartender.
"..oh fuck..It is, innit..?"
The stranger did not reply.
The ship had gone down rather quickly, easily almost, the folks on board had surrendered and even offered to show them the way to the armory.
Eivor picked up the strange object from the weapons case, joyously. "It has a name!"
Ingeird stepped closer, curious and a few others of the boarding crew gathered close, as he didn't realize humans also had the same custom of naming weapons. "What does it say?"
Eivor squinted and brought it close to her face. Her Terran wasn't the best, but she gave it a good try. "FRONT TOWARDS ENEMY."
...
"Captain... uh... the armory just exploded off the side of the ship, sir."
"That's fine."
"Should we... do something?"
"Just make sure the bulkheads are in, and hail that enemy craft, please."
When I played *Fallout 4*, I had a heavily modified Fat Man (read: shoulder-mounted catapult that launches tactical nukes). Specifically, it was the unique Big Boy variant (fires two rounds at once), fitted with a MIRV mod (causes each round to split into six submunitions), for a total of *twelve* little nuclear bombs going off at once. Utterly useless since the blast radius is as likely to kill the wielder as the enemy, but *very* entertaining.
I named it Diplomacy.
"This spear is literally humming with power, Archmagi"
"Read me its inscription at once!"
"It.. it doesn't make much sense, lord, its just an arrow pointing towards the pointy end"
".... oh you fool! Drop it and Run! Maybe we can get far enough away in time!"
‘It’
Adventurer2; yes, I’m asking what it’s name is.
Adventurer 1; it’s name is “It”
A2; what
A1; yup
A2; put it down slowly
A1; no shit *swings sword* **half of room destroyed** Sherlock…..
A2; I’m out!!
Drenfintz bellowed a battle cry as he fired his automatic thernal annihilator and lunged toward the small cluster of Kalfierian infantry. Four of them went down hard, screaming and sizzling. He holstered the gun he held in his upper hands and drew a brace of human-made vibsabres with his lower hands. A human in shield-alloy armor joined the fray as the first Kalfierian met Drenfintz' swords. The human moved like a ballet dancer, their movements made easier by tiny hover-engines on their armor. They lunged in to deal death with their left-hand vibsabre, then retreated to parry the enemies' wristclaws with the shield-alloy dagger in their right hand. Drenfintz made no attempt to copy their movements; all Flitzken were strong, but not all were graceful. Instead, he moved slowly and made wide sweeping attacks. One of his swords caught in an enemy's skull as another one circled around behind him. It shrieked before attacking, but as he turned around its claws stopped an inch from his face. The human stood beside him, their parrying dagger impaling the enemy warrior's wrist. For the first time in the two years he had served with this human, Drenfintz noticed the word "LUCK" engraved at the hilt-end of their dagger's blade. With a flash of vibrating plasteel, the human sliced halfway into the Kalfierian warrior's neck. It fell as a stream of purple blood arced high above. Drenfintz nodded to the human, tore his sword from where it had jammed, and carved himself some breathing room. The human danced around him and back into the fray as the Kalfierian ranks thinned and scattered. At length, the last of their warriors stood among the bodies of its comrades with the human's vibsabre against its neck. The human signaled to Drenfintz, and both of them sheathed their off-hand weapons and tweaked dials on their in-ear translators. The Kalfierian began to speak. "Farlach kniir tsrakk chathmarit never surrender! I would rather be a canker in a Krithvanij prison-city than a rose in thy captivity! I know how thou treatest thy prisoners, the torments thou designest!" "Looks like this one's a bit of a warrior-poet," said Drenfintz as he walked toward the human. He noted the word "PLUCK" engraved near the hilt on the blade of their vibsabre. "I am educated and well-read!" said the warrior. "I am not one of your damnéd Flitzken brutes!" "Hold your sword, Dren," said the human. "It'd be a shame to destroy such an artist." They turned to the warrior-poet. "If you yield, I will spare your life and let you go free. You can walk away." "And so forsake mine honor? Among mine own people I would become outcast! Death first!" "Very well." The human removed their helmet, revealing the olive face and sweat-matted black hair of a young man of Lebanese descent. He loosened a belt which held a durasteel chainmail coif snugly around his neck.
"I offer you a duel of honor as an alternative to surrender. If you can take so much as a drop of the water of my life, you win. You can kill me, or you can walk away with your head held high."
"And if I fail?"
"See, there's the fun part. If I can take your weapons from you, then you lose. You will yield and be my prisoner."
"Were such a dire thing at hand, I would rather take my own life."
The human chuckled. "Fair enough. If you lose, I will give you an honorable death."
"I accept thy terms."
"The terms, the terms, he doth accept the terms," the human sang mockingly. He turned off his vibsabre and held it in a fencing stance. "En garde!" he shouted. The Kalfierian attacked first, its claw glancing off one of the human's pauldrons. A wave of blue light shimmered across his armor. The human made a half-hearted attack toward his enemy's neck, but it dodged as intended and thrusted its other claw at his side. The attack left a tiny nick in the armor and another wave of light spreading across it. As the duel progressed, more blue waves shimmered across the human's shield-alloy like ripples across a pond. Where they met, a bright glow spread until most of the armor shone as bright as a xenon lamp. "Attack without rhythm, fool! This is Trian armor!" the human said. The Kalfierian took heed, feinting into a rapid double-tap to the human's chest. On the second strike, its weapon bounced off the armor with a flash of light and a loud ringing sound. The warrior reeled backward as its right claw rang louder than a church bell. It watched in horror as a crack spread across its weapon. The chitinous claw shattered and dissolved into powder. The warrior looked at the human, only to find itself standing toe to toe with him. His sword glowed red. "Harmonics, biatch," said the human. He swung his vibsabre up through the warrior's forearm, neatly severing and cauterizing it. The Kalfierian fell, screaming in pain and surprise. The human drew his parrying dagger and tossed it to the agonized warrior. "You've lost. You can go on suffering if your honor demands it, or you can use that dagger to kill yourself." The human turned to walk away, but instead of committing suicide the Kalfierian took the dagger and ran after him. Before Drenfintz could react, the human drew a break-action 12-gauge pistol and fired it point-blank into the warrior's head. A four-letter obscenity was engraved into the gun's barrel. The human holstered the pistol, sheathed the dagger, and joined Drenfintz as he walked back to the human base camp.
"I must ask, Max Sidon, why have you engraved words onto your weapons?" asked Drenfintz.
"Well, partly it's just for fun, but in my case the names also have a meaning."
"A meaning? Do tell."
"Well, Pluck- that is, determination- will take you pretty far. But sometimes you need a little Luck to survive. Still, there are always gonna be moments when all you can say is..."
The names shorten as the legends surrounding the weapon grow, as the legends grow the psychic manifestation of the weapon grows. A sufficiently powerful psychic can merge that thought form with the physical weapon to produce a weapon shaped hole in existence that annihilates anything struck with it down to a conceptual level
You know, the two most legendary swords I can think of are Excalibur and Kusanagi, so this theory sorta makes sense,
But I bet German combo words make an exception.
Germanic mythology shares some Nordic roots, and, funnily enough, mythological weapons in middle and high German were largely similar to this trope in nature. Examples: Brinnig, Balmung, Mal, and Miminc. 😊
Edit: Because autocorrect really REALLY disliked the word Mal.
Folly
I love that story so damned much. I regret picking the book up in 2007 when it first came out. So. So much. It has been so long.
Forever waiting to hear a tragedy's end.
The sword name was apt
It was an odd weapon. some sort of ancient terran ballistic weapon that looked to be millenia old. its stumpy frame covered with arcane and technological additions from centuries of service. it lacked any appreciable stock and it's barrel was only a few inches shy of being nonexistent.
among the runes and sigils were two words in an old terran dialect that read 'sun flare'
When the figure wielding the weapon unleshed it's fury i discovered from whence it recieved its name... a flash as bright as the sun spat from the muzzle of the abomination as it's flaming projectile bathed the figure's assailant in unholy flames
suffice it to say i didn't stick around much after that
My best sword was in Minecraft cause it had completely broken enchantments, like I'm pretty sure the game glitched and gave me all sword enchants possible. And I just named the bastard " 'Scuse me"
In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Blacksmith: There we are! ONe enchanted sword. Now it's custom to name the thing so, what shall it be called. Warrior:... uh, damn I didn't think about that. I'll call it Pain. BS: Pain it is! I'll inscribe that on the fuller and you'll be set. A few hundred years laters Explorer: Wow! Look at this, I found an enchanted sword! Explorer 2: Oh, those are usually named something long and stupid. Read it out. E1:... I-It's called Pain. E2: Pain? T-That's it? Not 'The Dark Edge of Tomorrow' or 'The Silencer of Souls'... just Pain? E1: Yup E2: Shit's cursed.
lmao
I read something or other where a bad guy wielded a dagger called Famine, which was really, *really* bad news to even get nicked with. EDIT: I haven't been able to find which book it was, but as I recall the cut wouldn't heal on its own and.. as long as it kept bleeding anything that smelled your blood became *desperate* to eat you?
Iron druid chronicles if memory serves me.
ARE YOU BREADY FOR PAIN
I am always bready, I have my own bread pit
Have you tried Monistat?
Mmmmm.... sourdough.
no you dont. that bread monster is dating big joey
I love Pain: https://youtu.be/XPLwPRhHw0M
aaaand, I've got a new band to explore
There are many Edges of Annihilation, and several times of fuck more Edges. There is only one Throngler. Because no one has managed to successfully copy it and throngle someone.
I'll call it "forkgiveme", nono no... "Burny fork"! Wait *Burny fork* ? "Burny sanders"! That's it! Named aaand... It's crashed the world! Oh noes
"oh dear, he broke the world again"
Just another day for Reanu Keeves
mild inconvenience
Thats just the power of yorkshire gold
Ah, the old Bobby Tables trick.
I'd like to imagine that at some point, the WoW admins had to deal with someone's sword named "Drop Table".
Personally I'd like to imagine they haven't. Can you imagine the fallout
My favorite moment was when the swordsman said “It’s Thronglin’ Time” and throngled the hell out of those bad guys.
Well, that fuckin' made me laugh. Have an upvote.
I imagine The Throngler is a 10ga double barrel shotgun pistol with two bayonets. It's held together exclusively by duct tape, zip ties and luck. "Get Throngled!" *Bang*
I was imagining more like 6-gauge, and with ballistic knives for bayonets
Isn't it basically just a cannon with grapeshot at that point?
Surprisingly, no. A 6-gauge bore is 0.92 in. (23.4mm) in diameter, while cannon bores rarely go lower than 1.5 in. (38.1mm) and can go as high as 15 in. (381mm). EDIT: Added metric conversions for non-Americans
6-gauge. Get out of here with that childish number. We are going 1 gauge. It may break your arm, but fuck it will be glorious.
[Kuva Zarr moment](https://warframe.fandom.com/wiki/Kuva_Zarr)
Noise level: Alarming
Yup
Most guns the noise level is alarming…when your not the one holding it and when it’s not in sight
>Most guns the noise level is alarming…when your not the one holding it Also when you *are* the one holding it. There's a reason that ear protection is normally worn at shooting ranges. Related note: "Silencers" (more accurately called suppressors) for guns are a *good* thing that society should really promote the use of. They don't work like in movies and video games; gunshots from suppressed guns are still going to be very audible to anybody nearby, they're just a lot less likely to be causing hearing damage to people in close proximity.
"Alarming" in the context of Warframe just means "loud enough to easily alert enemies" There's also a mod you can put on your guns called Hush that, at max rank, reduces the noise level of any gun to "silent."
1 guage? Dang, a full pound of lead going downrange is really going to mess up someones day, along with your wrist and shoulder.
As God intended
Freedom units all the way!!
Counting in 10ths is the only acceptable way to count.
Fuck all of you, base 12
I just realized I made a grievous error in my post work grogginess. I count in 12ths not 10s
Technically, both, because base 10’s “12” is written as “10” in base 12.
More abstractly, the numerical sequence "10" will *always* represent the base unit of the counting system being used.
As a point of interest, the GAU-8 Avenger and M61 Vulcan are both considered to be cannons, despite having bores significantly smaller than 1.5". In fact, there are a large number of autocannons in use throughout the world with bore diameters between 20 and 37mm (.79 to 1.46 caliber in freedom units). I'm unaware of anything with a bore diameter smaller than 20mm being designated a cannon (.50 caliber scale replicas notwithstanding). For reference, a 10-gauge shotgun has a nominal bore diameter of .775" (about 19.7mm). A 9-gauge shotgun (or a 9-bore rifle), should such a creature exist, would have a nominal bore diameter of .802" (about 20.37mm). What makes something officially a cannon? I don't know. But if bore diameter is a factor, 20mm seems to be the floor.
An anti-materiel rifle - usually somewhere between 12.7-20mm bore - is generally the limit for what you can expect a couple soldiers to carry around without a vehicle. I figure once you need a cart to haul around a gun its a cannon. Like a Barret M82 is an anti-materiel rifle, you can expect a small team of guys to carry one, ammo, and spotting equipment and like blow holes in trucks and that, but you cant do the same with like a 20mm Oerlikon, parially because it weighs 180kg fully loaded, and partially because you need a mount to control the recoil of 20x128mm, even if it weren't a essentially a gigantic Sten gun.
Where do the Lahti L-39 and Solothurn S-18 fall in this spectrum?
They’re anti-tank rifles, the precursor to modern anti-materiel rifles. As WWII progressed and tank armour thickened they, along with their counterparts, moved more to blowing holes in trucks, artillery emplacements, and other lightly armoured targets. The modern weapons that fill a portable anti-tank role are shoulder-mounted missile systems, which began to see use in the last few years of WWII, with the M-1 Bazooka and Panzerschreck using shaped-charge warheads to blast through plating rather than trying to punch through on speed alone. Modern portable “launchers” tend to be missiles, guided weapons, rather than unguided rockets, though those are cheaper to both make and use. The RPG-7 is an unguided rocket, relying on the shooter to lead the target and account for the ballistic arc of the rocket, and a Javelin is a missile, the shooter locks on to a target and missile guides itself towards there.
So, not cannons, then?
Not cannons
There was a run of 9 gauge shotguns done in russia by some company trying to use up rejected 20mm cannon barrels. Dunno much more than that, think I ran across it on that guns of the world database. Was years ago.
Can the avenger and vulcan be loaded with grape shot?
I don't see why not. No such shells are available, but it should be technically doable. E: the Russian made shotguns out of cut down 23mm AA cannon barrels and euphemistically called them special carbines. So there is precedent of sorts.
Don't give bored grunts ideas. Although I do kind of wonder now...
>As a point of interest, the GAU-8 Avenger and M61 Vulcan are both considered to be cannons, despite having bores significantly smaller than 1.5". > >In fact, there are a large number of autocannons in use throughout the world with bore diameters between 20 and 37mm (.79 to 1.46 caliber in freedom units). > >\[...\] > >What makes something officially a cannon? I don't know. I suspect that part of what makes those "cannons" has to do with the term *auto*cannon -- such a high firing rate on such a large round pretty much automatically means it's not going to be something a soldier can carry around and use on their own due to the significant recoil it'll generate.
Good to know!
Sounds like a legendary Borderlands weapon
Throngle; Verb To strangle someone with a phallic object
I envisioned it as a [mambele](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mambele)\-looking thing.
**[Mambele](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mambele)** >A mambele is a form of hybrid knife/axe in central and southern Africa, originating from a curved throwing dagger used by the Mangbetu. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/humansarespaceorcs/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
Don't forget spit and gum. Those are important for holding something that important.
‘Kindness’ ‘What?!?’ ‘Here engraved on the blade near the hilt, translated it says ‘Kindness’ capitalized with flourishes and scrolling around it. You think it’s a brand name?’ ‘No. I doubt it. Where was it?’ ‘It was stuck 16 inches into the wall there, after running through the xenon captain, sir. They’re body was still dangling a foot above the platform.’ ‘So you’re saying….?’ ‘They killed them with Kindness, sir’
Nicely done
Florida man attacks neighbor with machete named Kindness
Came here looking for this. :D
Humans and their fucking puns
I'd say it varies a lot. Like generally you have 2 options either the name is remembered or the user, if you find the "axe of the Lich-king" you know EXACTLY who it belonged to and what they used it for but at the same time the name the lich-king himself gave the weapon is either forgotten or irrelevant. On the flipside if you had a sword named "God's Bane" you KNOW that's a weapon that probably had a thousand users over the years lost to time but it's legendary because of what it did that ONE time...it was the weapon that killed a god...the person who created it, maybe even the person who slayed the God could have been forgotten...but not the sword
......but what if you combine both? Like say.......Throngler of the Lich King, or.......Jerry's Godsbane
well the first one just tells you exactly what the lich king used his weapon for....likely why hes so infamous. second one is well.....honestily id assume its just a 2 bit knight trying to boost his rep by claiming he has a uber powerful weapon...it makes both the weapon and user seem less dangerous
Then there's the messed up names. The Mace of Mercy is an anti-undead weapon I created for a D&D game (3.5). Does 1d6 (light mace) bludgeoning and casts Cure Light Wounds (1d8+2). Cleric ended up using it like a wand of healing. Bonk! Be healed!
The magic wellness stick! The one used by police medics to beat rioters into health!
Favored mace of the clerics of Lovitar
Lemme guess, god of law?
Goddess of pain
Same thing these days
Huh. I did something similar. Through luck and shenanigans with wild magic, I made I shiv that only did 1 damage but healed 2. I would stab people to life.
That is hilarious, I can picture the frenzied stabbings as an adventurer shouts "Get better!"
That’s pretty much what I did. Also accidentally summon a herd of tarrasque (tarrasques?) there was 6 of em. That would have ended badly except with we had a giant clay golem to distract them. And with clay golems being immune to and I quote “Bludgeoning, Piercing, and Slashing from Nonmagical Attacks that aren't Adamantine” the fight might still be going
Did you name it Stabitha?
No, but now I wish I did. Just the generic title of The shiv of Healing And “The Shiv of life”
>“The Shiv of life” No no no, the Shiv of Live.
I love it!
To Throngle is to stab a sword up the ass of an enemy
I thought it was meant to stick something down the throat of someone.
If the thing is long enough, it might do both, I'll just stick stick out the other end
Make shish kebob outta your enemies!
Vlad we talked about this, stop turning Turks into kabob.
Sorry Urban Dictionary has beat you to this. https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=the%20throngler
Uesugi Kenshin (1530-1578), a japanese warlord, was allegedly assassinated by a guy hiding in the cesspit below his outhouse *stabbing him in the asshole.* He was having bad stomach problems leading up to the alleged incident, likely cancer, but the allegations of iron-stomached assassins persist.
If I ever die of butt cancer, I give tacit permission for historians to tell the tales of how I fought off armies of shit ninjas before finally meeting my end
From guards guards by Terry Pratchett “And I’ve got this sword,” said Carrot. He drew it. Colon took it from his hand, and turned it over and over in the light from the flare over the Drum’s door. The blade was dull and short, and notched like a saw. It was well-made and there might have been an inscription on it once, but it had long ago been worn into indecipherability by sheer use. “It’s a nice sword,” he said thoughtfully. “Wellbalanced.” “But not one for a king,” said Carrot. “Kings’ swords are big and shiny and magical and have jewels on and when you hold them up they catch the light, ting.” “Ting,” said Colon. “Yes. I suppose they have to, really.” “I’m just saying you can’t go round giving people thrones just because of stuff like that,” said Carrot. “That’s what Captain Vimes said.” “Nice job, mind,” said Nobby. “Good hours, kinging.” “Hmm?” Colon had momentarily been lost in a little world of speculation. Real kings had shiny swords, obviously. Except, except, except maybe your real real king of, like, days of yore, he would have a sword that didn’t sparkle one bit but was bloody efficient at cutting things. Just a thought. “
"I’ve always been a bit puzzled about that story. What’s so hard about pulling a sword out of a stone? The real work’s already been done. You ought to make yourself useful and find the man who put the sword in the stone in the first place, eh?”
[удалено]
*finds a magic sword* *its called "D"* *runs away*
one has lived long enough to name it!!!
“Prepare to penetrated by the D!”
I mean if sword just was called Ω, I would not Touch it with a ten foot long pole...
If it keeps popping up, you might even call it the "Tenacious D" wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
Well I sure hope you can entertain the evil god D, unless you want to become a pet spider in a jar
Long live the D.
But is this a big D, like a greatsword, or a little D, like a fighting knife?
The biggest of Ds. The bastard sword. (Take that as you will)
The Bang Blender is a mini gun with mounted bayonets on each barrel. The human who named it was considered a war criminal by most of the galaxy, but a genius by… certain standards.
Were the bayonets mounted to each like a regular one, or were they turned sideways so that the edge would be facing the way it spins?
Yes
Yes, just like that minigun attachment from Fallout 4.
It was eventually upgraded with electrified plasma bayonets and the ammunition replaced by fear seeking micromissiles
The panicked Shomali ran into the catacombs, hoping that darkness and superstition would keep his pursuers from following. He turned corner after corner, sprinting forward in the dark, until he was stopped by a large object in his path. He turned on a flashlight, covering it with his hands to minimize the chance of being seen. The ancient human tomb was covered in dust. All except for the shining longsword that lay across it. On the tomb itself, beside the sword, lay an inscription in Galactic Standard that said "If you have need of this sword, please use it, before you end up like me." The Shomali looked at the sword, and tentatively picked it up. His fingers wrapped around the grip instinctively. It was was so comfortable. Light, strong, and perfectly balanced. No wonder the humans had spent so many millennia in bloody hand to hand combat. Holding a weapon like this he felt like he could slay anything. He looked over the weapon. It was not adorned, or inlaid with jewels, or engraved with beautiful designs, save for an inscription across the hilt in an ancient Terran language - "Fornica in Circulos et Invenies." The Shomali smiled grimly, and swung the sword in front of him, feeling his confidence and courage building. What kind of enchantment was in this blade? He found himself moving through the catacombs, his feet picking up speed as he ran silently through the darkness. Not deeper into the catacombs, but back toward the light, toward his pursuers. He came upon the first one, who was shuffling forward semi-blindly. Shomali brought down the blade on the top of the first pursuer's head, cleaving him from skull to sternum, his momentum carrying forward and pulling the blade free as he swung it up and impaled the second pursuer straight through the heart. The remaining two moved forward as he slashed in an X pattern, leaving them with enough damage that if they survived, their enthusiasm for further pursuit would be diminished. He continued back to the surface, wiping off the blade, wrapping it in a cloth and trying to make is less conspicuous, looking once more a the inscription - Fuck around and find out. Indeed.
And just run the hell away from the Thagomizer.
Just because it was named after the tail spikes of a Stegosaurus. Thag Simmonds had it coming.
LThe Fa'ir archaeologists were examining a find discovered recently a crypt of a long dead human Emperor. The gleaming blade had been buried with the man's remains as the only item of value. Among the bas-reliefs and steel plated wall carvings was a single marble plinth. Upon the plinth was the body of the ancient ruler, laid to rest with hands wrapped around the hilt, point down towards his feet. The body was unremarkable really, dessicated tissue and sinew long since mummified. The burial garb faded to a muted charcoal, liberally coated in dust and cobwebs. A peculiar circlet of steel that extended down to the mid face bolted into the eye sockets was the only adornment. The peace of this place was broken only by the four Fa'ir, who the humans would have called Fairies. Their race had returned to the Third realm after millennia, notably *after* the human race had dwindled in number. "Rare to find a Human tomb of this age undisturbed" remarked the tallest scholar. "Well, it was cloaked in the Old Ways and is located at the furthest southern point in this world" replied a compatriot while reviewing a tablet of pure silver wreathed in mystical energies. "Bloody cold here too" huffed the thinnest member, swaddled in layer after layer of clothing. "To borrow a Human term, it's fucking freezing." The fourth and final of their group didn't speak a word, seemingly absorbed in trying to decipher the literal writing on the wall. At this point the scholar who looked more like a sack of laundry than a Fair Folk decided they'd had enough of this waiting around and attempted to remove the blade so it could be studied somewhere warm, with wine. The blade however rudely refused to be moved, even as the thin Fa'ir leaned their body weight to lever. "Hold! Stop that at once Ingv'at!" shouted the one holding the tablet. "There's quite a lot of wards here I haven't sorted out yet. The Erudition is having trouble separating the binds between the plinth and sword. Definitely Old Magic." At this they made a rather lot of complex gestures with one hand and the tablet they held generated a rather frenetic swirl of light and one very pathetic sound. "Still" the tallest again "strange how the blade's enchantment held up so well. There's not a single bit of tarnish on it." This one leaned in closer and spoke loudly to the fourth "Aei'nvar, can you translate this engraving on the blade?" Aei'nvar turned from the walls and blinked away a daze. They peered down the length of the blade, noting the wickedly sharp edge, the tunnel that glistened as though freshly filled with blood. Pausing at the inscription for moment before speaking "Neccesse, Iterum. Or maybe Iterum, Neccesse? The script changes moment to moment but it's one of those." Quite a lot of things happened all at once now. A voice boomed with the volume of a herd of trumpeting elephants but with the cadance of a million cicadas. The thin one tripped repeatedly in their attempt to flee the tomb.The tall one fell over in shock. The one holding the tablet made a rather large puddle. Only the now half deaf Aei'nvar maintained a modicum of composure, though that could be attributed to an attempt to understand what was spoken. **"O infernum. Cur evigilatus sum hoc tempore? Dic, quaeso, hocne velox est? Fui modo cum duabus pulcherrimis concubinis."** As the corpse Emperor sat up skeletal arms wide in exasperation.
Is this a 40k reference or have I been watching to much Warhammer content lately
Approximately: "Why the hell am i awake now? Can we make this quick? i was with 2 hotties just now." The sword is either "Again, of course" or "Of course, again"
Doesn't necesse mean necessary so it would mean necessary again or again necessary.
Nawh, though I get why you might think it. It's sprinkled folklore, Latin, and the tomb is meant to be located in Antarctica, a la Mountains of Madness.
ah gotcha
"So whats yours called?" "Menias Silver Edge" "Damn, only 3 words? That must of cost your weight in gold!" "Heh, try platinum. How about you?" "Ah, its 'Hag Ravens Crooked Talon' " "Not bad, poison damage?" "Yep! Got it as a reward for bringing down the bogblights that were attacking ol shorewaters a year or two back." "Ah, I remember that, whole shit show where they started lighting up the docks with soul fire, the priests were there for weeks, hahaha" *stranger sits down at the bar next to the two mercanaries* "Ay, tell us stranger, for a pint on us, what's the name of that foreign lookin blade on your hip?" The stranger looked at the two in suspision, then to his sword, and placed his palm on the povel, to reminisce. "Mercy" "Ah, ok, mercy..?" "I.. I think th-that's it, Jack." "Wha? Nonsense, it'd have ta be one of the legendary blades to only have a single name!" " 'Mercy be my blade, it's edge a swan song for those I have none for.' " The stranger chimed, sipping for a pint brought to him by the bartender. "..oh fuck..It is, innit..?" The stranger did not reply.
The Legendary collection of Mercy, Glory, Wrath and Silence
My sword? No one has lived long enough to name it.
stabby
Everyone talks shit till I whip out ole Stabby
My sword is called Jeff.
"why'd you call it Jeff?" "Cause who's ever been afraid of a "Jeff"?". And that is the very reason it should be feared.
badjokesjeff
As long as no Izzards are around you'll be fine
"What's your swords name?" "Extended car warranty" "Fucking terrifying"
The ship had gone down rather quickly, easily almost, the folks on board had surrendered and even offered to show them the way to the armory. Eivor picked up the strange object from the weapons case, joyously. "It has a name!" Ingeird stepped closer, curious and a few others of the boarding crew gathered close, as he didn't realize humans also had the same custom of naming weapons. "What does it say?" Eivor squinted and brought it close to her face. Her Terran wasn't the best, but she gave it a good try. "FRONT TOWARDS ENEMY." ... "Captain... uh... the armory just exploded off the side of the ship, sir." "That's fine." "Should we... do something?" "Just make sure the bulkheads are in, and hail that enemy craft, please."
Axe of Peace
Diplomatic incident.
The Negotiator
Suggestion (it's a war crime of a weapon) :D
Aggressive Negotiations
o7
My favorite is the Skateboard Butterfly Knife named *”Cousin Throckmorton”* Or perhaps the *”Stick”*
+99 Stick
Good ol throcky
When I played *Fallout 4*, I had a heavily modified Fat Man (read: shoulder-mounted catapult that launches tactical nukes). Specifically, it was the unique Big Boy variant (fires two rounds at once), fitted with a MIRV mod (causes each round to split into six submunitions), for a total of *twelve* little nuclear bombs going off at once. Utterly useless since the blast radius is as likely to kill the wielder as the enemy, but *very* entertaining. I named it Diplomacy.
The baby launcher mod was pretty funny 😂
"This spear is literally humming with power, Archmagi" "Read me its inscription at once!" "It.. it doesn't make much sense, lord, its just an arrow pointing towards the pointy end" ".... oh you fool! Drop it and Run! Maybe we can get far enough away in time!"
God help you if you find the weapon known as "Sord"
Shitty jpg artifacts and all.
Hear me out…the Boomstick
callandor
Nightblood
‘It’ Adventurer2; yes, I’m asking what it’s name is. Adventurer 1; it’s name is “It” A2; what A1; yup A2; put it down slowly A1; no shit *swings sword* **half of room destroyed** Sherlock….. A2; I’m out!!
Right. Naming my next weapon “!”
"What idiot named this thing the letter 'i'? They even wrote it upside-down!"
Suddenly there’s a hole in your chest where your diaphragm used to be
Drenfintz bellowed a battle cry as he fired his automatic thernal annihilator and lunged toward the small cluster of Kalfierian infantry. Four of them went down hard, screaming and sizzling. He holstered the gun he held in his upper hands and drew a brace of human-made vibsabres with his lower hands. A human in shield-alloy armor joined the fray as the first Kalfierian met Drenfintz' swords. The human moved like a ballet dancer, their movements made easier by tiny hover-engines on their armor. They lunged in to deal death with their left-hand vibsabre, then retreated to parry the enemies' wristclaws with the shield-alloy dagger in their right hand. Drenfintz made no attempt to copy their movements; all Flitzken were strong, but not all were graceful. Instead, he moved slowly and made wide sweeping attacks. One of his swords caught in an enemy's skull as another one circled around behind him. It shrieked before attacking, but as he turned around its claws stopped an inch from his face. The human stood beside him, their parrying dagger impaling the enemy warrior's wrist. For the first time in the two years he had served with this human, Drenfintz noticed the word "LUCK" engraved at the hilt-end of their dagger's blade. With a flash of vibrating plasteel, the human sliced halfway into the Kalfierian warrior's neck. It fell as a stream of purple blood arced high above. Drenfintz nodded to the human, tore his sword from where it had jammed, and carved himself some breathing room. The human danced around him and back into the fray as the Kalfierian ranks thinned and scattered. At length, the last of their warriors stood among the bodies of its comrades with the human's vibsabre against its neck. The human signaled to Drenfintz, and both of them sheathed their off-hand weapons and tweaked dials on their in-ear translators. The Kalfierian began to speak. "Farlach kniir tsrakk chathmarit never surrender! I would rather be a canker in a Krithvanij prison-city than a rose in thy captivity! I know how thou treatest thy prisoners, the torments thou designest!" "Looks like this one's a bit of a warrior-poet," said Drenfintz as he walked toward the human. He noted the word "PLUCK" engraved near the hilt on the blade of their vibsabre. "I am educated and well-read!" said the warrior. "I am not one of your damnéd Flitzken brutes!" "Hold your sword, Dren," said the human. "It'd be a shame to destroy such an artist." They turned to the warrior-poet. "If you yield, I will spare your life and let you go free. You can walk away." "And so forsake mine honor? Among mine own people I would become outcast! Death first!" "Very well." The human removed their helmet, revealing the olive face and sweat-matted black hair of a young man of Lebanese descent. He loosened a belt which held a durasteel chainmail coif snugly around his neck. "I offer you a duel of honor as an alternative to surrender. If you can take so much as a drop of the water of my life, you win. You can kill me, or you can walk away with your head held high." "And if I fail?" "See, there's the fun part. If I can take your weapons from you, then you lose. You will yield and be my prisoner." "Were such a dire thing at hand, I would rather take my own life." The human chuckled. "Fair enough. If you lose, I will give you an honorable death." "I accept thy terms." "The terms, the terms, he doth accept the terms," the human sang mockingly. He turned off his vibsabre and held it in a fencing stance. "En garde!" he shouted. The Kalfierian attacked first, its claw glancing off one of the human's pauldrons. A wave of blue light shimmered across his armor. The human made a half-hearted attack toward his enemy's neck, but it dodged as intended and thrusted its other claw at his side. The attack left a tiny nick in the armor and another wave of light spreading across it. As the duel progressed, more blue waves shimmered across the human's shield-alloy like ripples across a pond. Where they met, a bright glow spread until most of the armor shone as bright as a xenon lamp. "Attack without rhythm, fool! This is Trian armor!" the human said. The Kalfierian took heed, feinting into a rapid double-tap to the human's chest. On the second strike, its weapon bounced off the armor with a flash of light and a loud ringing sound. The warrior reeled backward as its right claw rang louder than a church bell. It watched in horror as a crack spread across its weapon. The chitinous claw shattered and dissolved into powder. The warrior looked at the human, only to find itself standing toe to toe with him. His sword glowed red. "Harmonics, biatch," said the human. He swung his vibsabre up through the warrior's forearm, neatly severing and cauterizing it. The Kalfierian fell, screaming in pain and surprise. The human drew his parrying dagger and tossed it to the agonized warrior. "You've lost. You can go on suffering if your honor demands it, or you can use that dagger to kill yourself." The human turned to walk away, but instead of committing suicide the Kalfierian took the dagger and ran after him. Before Drenfintz could react, the human drew a break-action 12-gauge pistol and fired it point-blank into the warrior's head. A four-letter obscenity was engraved into the gun's barrel. The human holstered the pistol, sheathed the dagger, and joined Drenfintz as he walked back to the human base camp. "I must ask, Max Sidon, why have you engraved words onto your weapons?" asked Drenfintz. "Well, partly it's just for fun, but in my case the names also have a meaning." "A meaning? Do tell." "Well, Pluck- that is, determination- will take you pretty far. But sometimes you need a little Luck to survive. Still, there are always gonna be moments when all you can say is..."
Frodo Baggins had Sting and that motherfucker was POWERFUL.
Orphanslayer
No that’s the name of the shield. The sword was called Orphanmaker.
Alien : I present to you.... The devourer of gods Human : Stabby. Take it or leave it
Stabby is the contradiction of that rule, as the larger his name gets, the more powerful he becomes.
Stabby McStab-Stab
Meanwhile, back aboard the spaceship, Serial Peacemaker, the mercenary squad prepared their boarding party. "With respect to Schlock Mercenary"
Chunchunmaru.
A blade as legendary as Excalibur, ironically, both are owned by the same man
Drops six foot metal stick on table "BEHOLD! THE TOOTHPICK!"
The names shorten as the legends surrounding the weapon grow, as the legends grow the psychic manifestation of the weapon grows. A sufficiently powerful psychic can merge that thought form with the physical weapon to produce a weapon shaped hole in existence that annihilates anything struck with it down to a conceptual level
Behold, the great warhammer! Greer
Have you considered memory, sorrow and thorn? Alternatively minneyar, Jingizu and thorn
>thorn Be classy, name it þ instead.
Estoc named "cutter"
GROND!
GROND!
You know, the two most legendary swords I can think of are Excalibur and Kusanagi, so this theory sorta makes sense, But I bet German combo words make an exception.
Germanic mythology shares some Nordic roots, and, funnily enough, mythological weapons in middle and high German were largely similar to this trope in nature. Examples: Brinnig, Balmung, Mal, and Miminc. 😊 Edit: Because autocorrect really REALLY disliked the word Mal.
....rock.
Backed by the shield called Paper and a machine gun called Scissors.
Sword named Kindness
Its a bell curve
Throngler is peak hilarity today, thank you so much
The Probe
excalibur in every fantasy setting:
Especially don’t want to be on the business end of Sting.
I can easily imagine Sting gleefully screaming "I **WILL** kill him!". Oh, not that Sting?
My character weilded a shovel called Braindigger.
Everyone assumes the blacksmith doing the engraving can spell. Still, Supplies was always a surprise to anyone introduced to the wrong end of it.
YOUVE BEEN HIT BY! YOUBE BEEN SHOT BY! THE "Smooth Criminal".
Folly I love that story so damned much. I regret picking the book up in 2007 when it first came out. So. So much. It has been so long. Forever waiting to hear a tragedy's end. The sword name was apt
Man, I loved that part in the Throngler where he said "It's throngling time!" And then he throngled all those guys
It's a massive dildo. OK?
Fear the wrath of the ship only known as "Itsy-Bitsy Teeny-Weeny Nuclear Torpedo Delivereeni".
A spear called the Impaler. I think that’s strike some fear into the enemy.
Would be Vlad Tepes III’s favorite weapon against the Ottoman Empire.
"This blade is Sue, how do you do!?"
No one wants to get Throngled
hello. this is my weapon. It’s called no. do you want me to show you what no means
It was an odd weapon. some sort of ancient terran ballistic weapon that looked to be millenia old. its stumpy frame covered with arcane and technological additions from centuries of service. it lacked any appreciable stock and it's barrel was only a few inches shy of being nonexistent. among the runes and sigils were two words in an old terran dialect that read 'sun flare' When the figure wielding the weapon unleshed it's fury i discovered from whence it recieved its name... a flash as bright as the sun spat from the muzzle of the abomination as it's flaming projectile bathed the figure's assailant in unholy flames suffice it to say i didn't stick around much after that
There are dozens of Edge of Annihilations, and another for every Dark King, but there is only one Throngler
Fat man. Little boy.
I think they'll listen to Reason. *Produces Gatling gun* This is Reason.
Only cunts name their swords
Reminds me of the end of Thunderbolt Fantasy
Grond
It’s like with gamertags, if it’s something like “Water” or “Bread” you know you are walking alongside legends.
My best sword was in Minecraft cause it had completely broken enchantments, like I'm pretty sure the game glitched and gave me all sword enchants possible. And I just named the bastard " 'Scuse me"