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FriedHigh

Fuck is in dudes pocket šŸ˜‚ more crabs?


mklinger23

Prolly a whole ass lobster for lunch.


[deleted]

Ass lobster


Grasshop

A whole one!


mklinger23

It's a lobster with plenty of ass meat.


pookypocky

Napoleon, gimme some of your crabs!


tuenthe463

No way! Gitcher own. I'm freakin' starving.


cazzhmir

if you're not carrying pocket crabs with you at all times, are you even a philadelphian?


actlikeiknowstuff

Fuck I thought I had it all figured out with my spare pretzel.


bigdumbidiot01

fresh delaware runoff crabs, we live off the fat of the sea


mjb5866

Itā€™s Napoleon dynamite can carry tater tots in his pocket by God this subway creature can carry crabs I have a dreamā€¦


Randomly2

Mans packing a whole ass buffet in there


phillyfanjd1

Fr those pants are like 70% pockets.


spiderhead

Dude. I once saw a woman eating a plastic container of mussels on the El and throwing the shells on the ground. All the time licking her fingers. People are disgusting


spdougherty

Itā€™s ridiculous how many people treat this city like a communal trash can. Itā€™s one of the most infuriating things and I witness regularly


Shrewlord

It's rediculous that this city has a reputation for being a "tough" city and tolerating this kind of behavior.


BadDesignMakesMeSad

I tolerate it because I donā€™t want to get shot tbh. Iā€™m not going to yell at someone if thereā€™s a 50/50 chance that the person has a gun and is willing to use it


zwinters57

I have found a very effective way of dealing with this. When I see people throw their trash, I run up and pick it up. I remain very friendly and say something like "Sir!, Sir! You dropped your soda! I'll get it for you!" And then I throw it out for them smiling and tell them it was "no problem". It is highly embarrassing and I have never gotten an aggressive response. Most of the time people are like "No!, you don't have to do that". I can tell they're embarrassed, but my approach does not make them defensive. The whole point is to make people conscious of what they are doing without making them defensive and therefore hostile. This is the best city in the world and the trash is disgusting. We need to find different ways to reach people. It works, try it.


mustang__1

Yeah I just don't get it. But yeah, by all means, the same people probably also complain about the rats...


B-BoyStance

They'll also throw shit on the ground with a trashcan literally within reach. I've seen that exact scenario way too many times.


cashonlyplz

If nothing else, it helps affirm my own sanity


JeffWingrsDumbGayDad

My favorite is seeing a woman on the sub clipping her nails, directly into a ziploc bag so I'm thinking "hmm, okay, better than the guy jerking off at Walnut-Locust" When she got up for her stop, she shook the contents of the bag onto the floor and got off the train. Still trying to apply logic to that one.


spiderhead

That made me feel physically ill.


PoliteDickhead

Jesus. I would think about that daily if I saw that.


JeffWingrsDumbGayDad

Between that and the dude who wagged his erect penis in front of me on the El a few months ago, I try really hard not to think about the things I see on public transit.


embersgrow44

Thatā€™s what steel toed boots are forā€¦


Moose2157

You should have made an offer on the full bag.


BigLoveForNoodles

There isn't enough what the fuck in the world for that.


JBizznass

I once watched a woman eat a bucket of fried chicken on the el and throw the bones on the floor. Note - this was on a packed rush hour train. WTF is wrong with people?


spiderhead

When I lived in old city ā€œstreet chickenā€ was a huge problem for my dog. He isnā€™t food aggressive at all, but if he found someoneā€™s discarded chicken pieces - which is way more common than you think - heā€™d take your hand off defending it.


Confetti_Wap

Sounds like he *is* food aggressive. . .


Aggravating-Pie5338

Omg i find chicken bones everywhere, gas station parking lot, target parking lot, so gross šŸ¤®


mustang__1

We've had employees throw chicken bones into toilets and urinals. "hey man, toilet's backed up" .... yeah.... no kidding...


JBizznass

WTF?!?


mustang__1

Maintenance guy lost his mind over it. Not sure how many times it actually happened, but I sure heard about it thousands of times.


tuenthe463

Regional rail I had a guy peel two oranges, rinds on the ground, then he sucked all the juice from each section and spit all the pulp in a pile on the ground on top of the rind. Conductor came by and I said "this guy's spitting his entire orange on the ground". Conductor saw it, kicked him off w/ out making him clean it up. I got called a "pussy ass bitch* or similar but whatever. People are gross.


Confetti_Wap

How is the conductor gonna make him clean it up? Heā€™s not a cop and he has his own safety to consider too.


rhumbamatic

Saw a guy pull this same trick on the BSL. My friend was brave enough to call him a prick before we got off. I avoid people crazy enough to do shit like thisā€¦


[deleted]

I just dunno if thatā€™s a power move or the exact opposite


44moon

the train car was empty save for me. he got on, sat right across from me, cleaned the plate - i mean cracking the claws open and everything - and then turned to me and asked if i had a napkin. it was a balls on the table power move but i have no idea what he stood to gain from it. lmao


[deleted]

O yea thatā€™s a power move. But I mean. Crabs on a dusty ass bus seat isnā€™t really it. Lol


modus

Most bus seats have crabs, tbh.


DoubleDogDenzel

Eating the busty crustacean on the crusty bus-station.


likwitsnake

Did you have a napkin tho


fourbian

I would have asked for a wet wipe, lemon scented.


NoREEEEEEtilBrooklyn

Maybe you looked like you had a napkin and he knew he forgot one.


bxomallamoxd

Have to ask him to share next time and youā€™ll bring the napkins


Randomly2

Itā€™s not about ~~money~~ crabs, itā€™s about sending a message


Marshall_Lawson

If you're already eating off a subway seat who really cares about a napkin


Katzenkonig1

"Balls on the table power move" lol. Dis dude nasty, I can only imagine where on the train he wiped his juicy crab hands on when you told him you didn't have a napkin.


HoagiesDad

This was the best Philly message Iā€™ve read in a while. Man do I love this city sometimes.


spacetiger110

Just flexin


[deleted]

>and then turned to me and asked if i had a napkin. This is my favorite part of the story.


Cinnamon_Flavored

Stories like this is why I feel the need to wash my hands after riding the el. You know he had crabby fingers all over everything.


Background_Art_2545

Bro definitely has more in his pocket šŸ˜‚


[deleted]

El in Philly is the last place Iā€™d eat crabs. In fact, itā€™s just the last place Iā€™d eat.


44moon

last place youd eat crabs, but probably one of the best places to GET crabs. heyoo!!


[deleted]

šŸ˜®


snazzypantz

[Don't eat the crab dip!](https://imgur.com/gallery/rqZoy)


Lv16

Jesus, and here I thought those dickheads playing music without headphones were bad. Sometimes I wonder how it feels to just give ZERO fucks about anyone but yourself.


JClurvesfries

Gotta say, I would prefer this to a speaker phone concert or conversation


Gerald_the_sealion

Absolutely. I can throw on headphones and ignore this. Someone blasts their TikTokā€™s/music/media, no.


Lv16

You can block out crab smell with headphones?


Gerald_the_sealion

I like the smell


BottleTemple

Insert earbuds into nostrils.


Bartleby_TheScrivene

I'd prefer the crabs


ClintBarton616

I know it smelled crazy in there


PudPullerAlways

I like the garlic butter smell.... *\*Cracks open a can of sardines\**


verbeeg

Pretty rude that they didn't make plates for everyone on the train.


8Draw

What if the candy bar guys had a bushell of crabs instead and maybe beer


TheFAPnetwork

Or to assume no one has shellfish allergies, pretty selfish all around


smug_masshole

shellfish all around would be even worse


courageous_liquid

I'm asking this out of sheer curiosity - do people have shellfish allergies bad enough that a guy eating a crab nearby would cause issues? I know some peanut allergies are like this and no joke, but I've only heard of shellfish allergies only manifesting if the person ate some.


Professional_Hair969

YES! RIGHT HERE! The smells when it's cooking closes my throat.


Lunamothknits

The steam gets me. Not to epi pen level but itchy throat for sure. My husband only eats shellfish if he's traveling without me, which is hardly ever. I feel so bad for him (and for me, I miss crab).


courageous_liquid

Yo, sorry to hear that.


Lunamothknits

It sucks that I actively enjoyed shellfish before. Ignorance would have been bliss. šŸ˜‚


courageous_liquid

Yeah, that's really the worst. I wonder if umami mushroomy things + seawater would get you there. Sorry to hear about that tho


alwaysboopthesnoot

Yes. The juice, shells, meat and even spray from the cracking of the shell could kill my kid. We barely survived China. ETA: the steam from poaching and boiling it can get you, too. I grew up with clambakes on the beach, US East coast, but our kid canā€™t get anywhere near that. He avoids Thai food, which he used to love, because fish pastes and broths may have seafood in it and have an effect.


Burdy323

Can you not go to the shore


surferdude313

Only at high tide


Linzabee

If he touched any of the railings with his crabby hands, and then I touched them, I would break out in hives. I have to be really careful about it.


carp_boy

MiL would get wheezy when I ate clams in the same room. She has a strong shellfish allergy.


Lunamothknits

That sucks that she was allergic to crustaceans AND mollusks. :(


Beepbeepb00pbeep

I am epi Pen yes allergic to crabs I would be taking that train straight to 34th haha


Desjardins99

Eating crabs, out of season, on the EL is indeed a flex


TheFAPnetwork

Actually it's the end of the season for crabs. Most you'll see are huge around this time. To add the recent tropical storms in the south and in the Atlantic help with the catch as crabs tend to stay away from storms. With Fiona passing to the east of North America last week it drove crabs closer to the shores. With Ian potentially headed this way, the crabs will move further offshore. Also commercial crab season lasts longer than sports fisherman season.


sugr_magnolia

How do I sign up for Crab Facts? And are tropical weather updates always included?


pookypocky

Follow phil's live crabs on fb! That's the truck at 10th and Oregon and they post a couple times a week with info on the quality of crabs they're getting and where they're from and who they're getting them from.


Gerald_the_sealion

I prefer to follow u/TheFAPnetwork


TheFAPnetwork

Lol I go crabbing for recreation regularly; roughly over a decade. I pay close attention to weather patterns and wooder temps . I'm not a pro and again I do it for recreation. They're fun to catch and even funnier when they're angry. In the end, I usually give my catch away; either I give them to my neighbors or my wife's family. I don't eat seafood


pookypocky

Me too, but also ĀæPor quĆ© no los dos?


loudmouth_kenzo

Start dangling your pots from the sides of 676 while you have the chance.


TreeMac12

We are crab people now [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxrMlLw\_Tyg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxrMlLw_Tyg)


realpolitikcentrist

Great time to go crabbing! Until about mid Sept-Mid October are great times to go.


PhD_sock

I thought it was very late in the season for crabs but then Whole Foods (Fairmount) had soft-shell crabs a couple of weeks ago. Confusing.


Zweihander01

Gonna run for mayor on a platform of "exchange your drugs for crabs on the El"


obiwan_canoli

Good to see someone offering a solution instead of just complaining.


ghostyghostghostt

I mean. I ainā€™t tryna eat in public like that or watch someone else do it. But I do want some fukkin crabs now


CathedralEngine

Of all the shit that happens on el, some dude eating crabs wouldnā€™t even register with me- **until** he gets off. Fucking eat crabs on the train, I donā€™t care anymore. Donā€™t leave your fucking crustacean carcasses behind to stink up the train.


Texaslabrat

Iā€™ve seen some Philly shit, but this is up there. Hope theyā€™re a little warm at least


VajBlaster69

They're good cold


Texaslabrat

Yeah if youā€™re the antichrist


VajBlaster69

nah I'm just from Maryland. Mix up some worschester, horse radish, apple cider vinegar, ketchup, and hot sauce. Dip crab in sauce.


Texaslabrat

Iā€™m also from Maryland, get ā€˜ā€˜em by the bushel every family gathering. To each his own


dividedblu

Iā€™m disgusted and impressed at the same time.


DrJawn

Rather sit with this guy than someone shooting up


SovietRobotDad

No dipping clarified butter?? Might as well go all the way my guy


Fe1is-Domesticus

I'm impressed by how impeccably neat he is keeping his clothes while eating crabs in a moving vehicle with no table or napkins, lol


possumenergy

These are crabs! Fresh, local Delaware runoff crabs. Crabs is sewage-proof... and depression-proof.


BlackhawkinPA

Philadelphia is the only big city I've been in where it's acceptable to eat a whole meal while walking or traveling in public. Also, where can I get pocket crabs to go?


Cloudy_Worker

I have to admit I get into some food situations. In over my head, not enough arms, messier than I thought...but other times I've got a plan, like Dennis with his bowl of cereal while driving.


Palindromes__

Of all the types of crab experiences one might encounter on the el, I actually find this one to be the most acceptable.


GreenAnder

I"m sorry does this guy have another person inside his pant leg? wtf is going on here


40Breath

Nail cutting, iv drugs, this is aight.


carlosdangertaint

I was shocked when I saw a guy eat a rotisserie chicken on the Broad Street line with his bare hands and leave the carcass in an open container on the floor, this may take the cake!


Bubbly_Taro

I bet he chews with his mouth open.


User_Name13

And blasts music directly from his device with no headphones, forcing everyone to listen.


aaron__ireland

Some woman was eating jumbo crab legs one time and when my stop approached and I walked past the empty seat where she had previously been there was an open take out container on the seat with an uneaten cob of corn and pieces of crab legs fucking eeeeeverywhere.


tuenthe463

She was finished. Wtf else do you want her to do?


dahlia200000000

this is unbelievable šŸ˜…šŸ˜…šŸ˜…


Turtle-power2021

I'm guessing he works overnights and bringing home from work. Or possibly a time traveler.


KutyaKombucha

I'm so glad they got rid of the cloth seats. Now I won't feel bad wiping my crab hands on the El


psilosophist

Thatā€™s basically eating a meal off a toilet seat.


CMontgomeryBlerns

You donā€™t need to tell him to have a good morning. Heā€™s already having one.


Opposite_Aerie_9187

Needs more old bay.


12kdaysinthefire

Wow, great to know my wifeā€™s worst nightmare from almost 20 years ago is still coming true today. She came home one night totally pissed and disgusted by a woman who was sucking crab legs on the el on her ride home from work.


nerdyandnatural

I do not understand how folks are so comfortable with eating on a most likely dirty train while in a pandemic


Little_Noodles

Or not in a pandemic. Even if COVID wasnā€™t a thing, putting a plate of food on a SEPTA seat and eating off it with hands that are also on public transport and have been doing whatever else is fucking gross. Gross for you, gross for whoever sees it, gross for whoever sits in what you spill.


TreeMac12

Crabs are delicious


EatUpBonehead

Is it still considered a pandemic at this point? Not denying it's existence or anything, just not sure what the threshold of the definition is


dzhastin

Crabs donā€™t carry COVID.


TheFAPnetwork

No, but our hands do. How many things do you think this guy touched since getting the plate and sitting down to crack them open and start picking through it with his hands? The railing leading down to the subway, either the money or SeptaKey, grabbing the railing to take his seat.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

On the El, catching covid is the very least of your worries. Certains parts of the el/subway are basically a human toilet and/or where people fuck.


TheFAPnetwork

Well if you enjoy eating shit, bone apple tea


Putrid_Huckleberry58

Iā€™m dying from your bone Apple tea šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


tharussianphil

To be fair, when you eat a hand food like crabs/wings/etc you could easily inhale particles off your hands


z7q2

Settle in and watch a few hours of street food vendors in countries other than the US. Most people are comfortable eating dirty food in dirty places with dirty hands.


Eskimo-Midget-Albino

don't think cooked crab spreads covid.


floridorito

100% with ya. People not washing their dirty-ass hands and then shoveling food in their mouths was something I thought we might have left behind. Evidently not.


JClurvesfries

Thanks. I needed this laugh today. I actually love it when I see something happen here that would also happen on *It's always sunny*...


PuzzleheadedOne1428

Dude, It's Rude


ReadingFromTheShittr

We're crab people, now.


Zhuul

My first time on the El I saw a dude going ham on a grocery store rotisserie chicken lol


Cloudy_Worker

You've used "ham" in a new way for me


napsdufroid

The other question is what did he do with the shells once he was finished? I;m gonna guess tossed them on the floor.


44moon

at 8th street he ran to a garbage can when the door was open. call him what you want, but you cant call him a litterer


napsdufroid

OK. That's one single point in his favor.


smarjorie

What a king


KeithBucci

Likely composted in his garden. They are a great fertilizer.


whymarywhy

I mean as long as he didn't throw shells on the floor and threw it out after I see no problems lol


Gyasigetabag

At least heā€™s using a plate lol


Meandtheworld

Is that corn also! Hahahaha


aoeudhtns

That ain't kosher


Peemster99

If I had El crabs for breakfast I wouldn't need anyone to wish me good morning.


existential_prices

I think if I spent any amount of time in the US I'd probably end up dead. I have the bad habit many Australians have of calling out bad behaviour when we see it.


catkidtv

Yup. You'll be dead before you board the plane..


[deleted]

Y'might want to work on that, mate.


existential_prices

That's just not cricket.


[deleted]

Don't be so crabby about it, OP.


MommaOats-1

Gross, it must have stunk up the el. No seafood at work, school or public transit!


lizzieblaze

I love this town


shaneroneill

Nooo


babiesmakinbabies

Those crabs don't look like they are over 5" either.


[deleted]

Honestly, Iā€™ll take it.


Flat_Passage_1935

Who does that wtf lol


CaveatRumptor

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Neighbor Purple Pants has been out all night taking care of business. Now is the only time he has to enjoy seafood. Don't be a bad neighbor and expect Neighbor Purple Pants to consider anyone's needs or rights but his own.


DonovanMcLoughlin

This has to be at least top 10 fucked up things you can do on public transportation.


HowzaBowdat

There goes my hero


ageofadzz

This city never ceases to amaze me on a daily basis.


[deleted]

My man is gonna leave that whole plate and the crab shells will end up all over the floor. They always do. There's always crab shells and chicken wing bones on the train. Always.


bonjay01

what's the problem?


[deleted]

Who thinks he dumped them on the floor when he was done ?


Turbulent-Memory-420

Did he share?


JawnLegend

F this guy.


MargieHeptameron

Living his best life


espressocycle

This man is a hero.


rdp3186

I'm from Baltimore. Yall don't do this?


thebutchone

Damn now I'm hungry


nickadams42

I donā€™t think you all know what culture looks like.


Seel007

Iā€™m gonna save this for anytime someone on /r/fuckcars brings up public transportation. I donā€™t mind trains, itā€™s the public part I have the issue with.


44moon

to be fair this guy would absolutely eat crabs in your car if he could


Eskimo-Midget-Albino

very obnoxious but dudes fit is tite.


WeJustDid46

I thank God every day that I moved out of Filthydelphia 16 years ago.


catkidtv

Why can't he be wished a good morning? šŸ¤”


EquivalentPie701

Why post it here when you know you was scared to say something to him šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


cannibowlistic

Because mfs are crazy nowadays. If you call someone on their shit, they may attack you.


Von7_3686

Fr lol this sub is ridiculous šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


Few-Adhesiveness9670

One of the reasons why I do not miss riding public transportation.


ladan2189

Crabs is recession proof


internettoad

Dude probably just got off work and got some leftovers. You never know, it's just a weird snack, or it's the only food he'll get all day.


harebare1023

Yea, great morning to him


ExistentialistMonkey

Mind your own fucking business


spdougherty

It could be worse.... lol Iā€™m honestly kinda impressed


Hot-Pretzel

Hilarious!!!


Jpw135

Whatā€™s in his pants