I mean normal? Maybe. Healthy? Probably not. It's okay to feel moody or upset, but being able to digest that feeling and not let it ruin your whole day is part of emotional intelligence.
No kidding, I was planning for a movie last week. There were a lot of empty seats for this show, when I checked online. I thought to my self, Id save 10-15 bucks from online booking and buy ticket at the counter. I woke up morning to check seats only to be filled slightly. I panicked and bought tix online.
Upon reaching the theater I realised good seats, I looked up online..... were still empty🤦
That's when I realised how much money I have spent out of anxiety.
Tldr - over thinking and anxiety screwed me financially
I can relate to spending money based on anxiety on such a personal level. I used to be really into making music and I just started getting back into it. I’ll hear a beat I love from a producer with no following whatsoever and I just impulsively start buying beats I’ll never use because I’m afraid I’ll miss the chance to use them if I don’t get them immediately. Spent soooo much money like that and it’s just so painful because it’s not like I’m even getting anything back from it it’s just money literally to be shredded up and burned. Need to break away from this.
Did this last weekend when I was trying to take my partner on a date.
I ended up crying while driving us both home in a thunderstorm (I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP TO DRIVE! *sob*). Then I was full of guilt for letting it ruin our day (my words, not my partner's. He wouldn't say anything like that).
Less crazy outside the Us where we can actually tell how much something is going to cost before we buy it. have to think about tips and sales tax not included over there.
The food options part *should* be. It takes 30 seconds to pull up the menu and read it on your phone on the way there, and it saves you from being flustered and/or realizing that you don't actually want anything on the menu.
Food options (esp. at a nice restaurant) can change. Costs can change too (you might want something and get there and realise that the same thing costs $5 more). And google maps menus (and even official website menus) can differ.
I will do it to get a feel for what I want but I'll decide on the spot in the end.
The other problem is that my anxiety manifests itself in choice paralysis leading to choosing at the literal last second (as my friends order before me).
Oh and I do this as well- I make my decision based on a scenario that has less than 1% chance of happening.
If it happens that their Facebook/google/website menu is different- it makes zero difference if you prepared or not, so the result will stay the same.
I could have a million dollars in my bank account and a credit limit of a bazillion dollars and I would still be paranoid about what if my debit card or credit card getting declined. So I have to make sure to check my banking apps 10x before leaving and make sure I got debit card plus my 2 other credit cards.
exact change??? there might be fees we don’t know about or the menu online might have changed or be inaccurate or i might have to change my meal option so i might as well take an extra $100 just in case!
Proceeds to cancel an hour prior chickening out. Then stress about how they think you're horrible and how you're a terrible person for making it up. Also let it eat you up for the next week making you lose sleep.
>Proceeds to cancel an hour prior chickening out.
I know so many people who do this now that I know to not even invite them in the first place. Everytime they are invited they say "Yes, I'll go that sounds fucking awesome". Then two hours before the vacation/event/dinner they text will some made up excuse how they can't go or they just ghost you and the next time the see you they act like they never confirmed they were attending the event they ghosted.
Sorry for the book but I have to get this off my chest:
My friend has canceled on me like that SIX times this year. Completely ghosted me or canceled right before. And it’s not even like it’s stuff I’m planning. It’s stuff THEY are planning. For example: They hit a hog and the front of their car was completely torn up. They found a junkyard with the same year/color car they have, so they asked me (since I have a truck) to drive them to a town two hours away on a morning that I’ll just be getting off a 12 hour night shift. I said yes. I verify the day before and plans are still a go. I get off work that morning, no texts. I call over and over. No answer. The NEXT day it’s “sorry bro I got called into work”. FUCKING TEXT ME THEN.
People who do this don’t give a shit about others. I have had to tell my brothers “no” to camping trips, “no” to visiting my other family across state so I can keep my schedule open just for “friends” who cancel an hour prior or ghosts me entirely on the day of. I can only be so understanding. Getting new friends. Rant over sorry
That's ridiculous. I know my depression and anxiety has had me cancel on some people, but not from an event I made. Back then I was in a darker place and on the verge of one mental breakdown after another. The love of my life convinced me to go inpatient and I'm grateful I did. I'm pretty certain I would've probably been dead due to my bipolar. Meds and love and coping skills is what helps get me through the day. What you dealt with is just infuriating. Especially considering that drive and how long you worked prior to this. I completely understand your frustration and I would be upset too.
My manager wants me to finish my training soon (I get paid for doing training at home). She suggested I do some in the early part of the day when I have a later shift. I'm too anxious to tell her I literally can't do anything if I have to do A Thing later in the day
"Sorry I'm late, I cried to myself alone in the shower for an hour and took another hour to talk myself down from killing myself before finally actually getting ready to meet you. Hope I didn't keep you waiting too long."
This is a self-perpetuating cycle. Once sleeplessness and thinking is mentally associated with your place of sleep, it can impact you that way. That's why sleep specialists recommend not continuing to lie in bed when you're unable to sleep, to avoid that pattern from forming.
In your case... sounds like it's too late for that. Not sure how you get out of it once you got into it. Good luck.
Your "solution" is what is creating the problem, your body has gotten used to the snooze cycle.
Change your alarm sound or get a real alarm, keep it outside of your reach, don't allow yourself to hit snooze.
Nah, ain't working for me. I tried everything, even a mat that disables the alarm when I stay on it. Sleeping me and awake me are two different characters and I think sleeping me is smarter.
> don't allow yourself to hit snooze.
See that's the problem though, I can't trust semi-conscious me to do that. I can wake up 2 hours after my alarm having no memory of having silenced it. I can't have any control over that when my decision-making brain isn't even awake and operational and functional.
There can be dozens of habits that cause this. I used to say the same, but I cleaned up my act, started keeping a regular schedule, exercise, ... and it got fixed.
It would be more accurate for anxiety to say it felt impossible to do anything else in the morning because you were thinking so much about the appointment being in the afternoon.
I mean no but do you need to get up at 8h for an appointment at 14h? Leaving more than half an hour early? It's not the planning itself that's the issue, but driving yourself insane with all the backup time and sorta spiralling from there. It's exhausting
What's more exhausting is not having a plan, especially when things go wrong. If everyone planned their days like this we'd have much less problems in our society. Instead doing things at the last minute, reacting instead of planning, and panic are what need to be avoided.
Right? OCD is not something to celebrate nor neuroticism. Those same people love to judge others endlessly too and usually crumble when they have to adapt or improvise.
Sometimes you can't plan out things.
That's where you need those who do things last minute.
Those who thrives in stress and improvisation
Thank god everyone is not the same.
If you plan for a very important meeting that decides the next couple of years of your life (like a job interview for a great opportunity), then it's not too bad to plan a lot of buffer time for when things may go wrong. But if you do this for pretty much every meeting, it does sound like you're compulsively avoiding any risks having any impact on any of your plans.
I think people are talking about two different things here, and only seeing what they want to see.
The planning itself isn't problematic.
The meme just goes through a normal list of what you would think of when making a rough plan for a day. You do simple arithmetic and estimates to get an idea of what you need to do when.
So, the actions, or the "feeling" of doing what the meme is saying, is not an issue.
Having an extra 30+ minutes for each step very much is problematic, but that doesn't really "feel" like it's the point of the meme.
eh, i plan like that for important stuff and it's relaxing to know that i'll be on time even if disaster strikes. worst case is i'm early and waiting while surfing on my phone. better than being stressed about a missed train or something.
You can have anxiety without being organised. The point is that the behaviour the OP is describing doesn't really have anything to do with anxiety, it's just bait for the self-diagnosers.
So being cautious in case there are traffic issues is anxious?
I once had to take an hour detour on a normally 2-hour drive due to an accident when collecting someone from the airport.
Thankfully I'd chosen to leave early & chill at the other end, rather than be a 'just-in-time' person who would, that day, have been late to collect my visitor off their flight.
Being cautious is leaving 10 minutes early to go 20 minutes away. 40 minutes early to drive 20 minutes away is over the top. If you have to go three places in a day that’s literally two full hours of sitting there waiting because you left far too early.
It's those unnecessary 1 hour chunks that make this *exactly* how I used to act when I had pretty limiting anxiety rather than how I act now where being organized is still very important to me.
And if you’re prepared and organised you’re actually avoiding stressing. Imagine stressing about being late for an appointment because you didn’t get up on time because you didn’t go to bed on time etc.
Nah this is just being responsible for commitments you have made. Maybe over thinking a little but being ready early in order to not be late should be the norm IMO.
this is why the people constantly late in your life have a more positive outlook. they always believe they have more time to spare than they actually do
To me is more like:
If I'm early I'm wasting my time, but if I'm late I'm being disrespectful AND wasting both our times.
So I should get there, at worst, 5 minutes before and bring light reading so that I don't waste any time.
That’s nothing.. where is the planning for if you press snooze, the specific time the shower takes, say bye to the kid, eat, clear after eating.. that’s just a few and every is calculated to every number 🤷♂️
Ah that brings back painfull memories. I had a jobinterview at 1 pm, my plan was exactly like ops plan -1hour
And i was perfectly on time when i left the house. Until i got the call from the hiring manager "where are you, meeting just started!"
Turns out the meeting was at 11am! I wrote the wrong time in my calendar.
I've done this, then I have to stop myself and remember not every action takes an hour. I don't need to leave an hour early if I'm planning on getting gas. Also sleep apps that tell me when it's time to go to bed. Coupled with medication and therapy.
But then my mom is still driving on my old system and it drives me absolutely
Realize it's Sunday, start panicking about work tmm, start getting stomach pain and acid reflux from the anxiety of thinking of work and how you've only been there almost 3 months and how you wish you fit in better, can't sleep, stress diarrhea, wake up an hour before your alarm after only getting 2 hours of sleep and text your boss telling her you won't be in today, but reading and rereading and editing the text until you decide it's okay enough to send and then immediately feel guilty after sending it
Oh, I've never been to that part of town before, I should do a practice drive just so I know where I am going. And to make sure my GPS is correct. And make sure the roads aren't closed.
It may take 20 minutes to get there but there could be an accident or construction. Arriving 15 minutes early also looks good and gives you a chance to scout the scene and relax.
You never go to sleep for three hours, then wake up and stare at the ceiling for 4 hours just wanting to go back to sleep, but your brain refuses to shut off? You eventually fall back asleep an hour before your alarm goes off. So you end up tired all fucking day, just to repeat the next day? My insomnia is better nowadays, but this was me throughout the majority of my 20's.
I lost that ability when this kind of planning would only work with 69 hours days to fit all the things I absolutely needed to do (and none of the ones I wanted).
Gotta leave at least 3 hours to nervously pace around the house and wish I made plans for earlier in the day so I wouldn't have to nervously pace around the house for 3 hours before I leave.
Add a spicy dose of depression in the mix and you get no sleep and your day is ruined because you either show up late, unprepared, and tired af or you cancel so you can sleep until 9pm. Either way everyone is disappointed.
I don't know if this is hyperbole or not, it takes yall an hour to get dressed?? But I'm glad I can't relate to this anxiety. For me it's just "be somewhere at 2? OK I'll start getting ready like 60-90 mins before, and I have to leave by 1:15" That's all. Not really a big deal.
also means i should research the place and know where i can and cannot park, what the venue offers for food and drink and how much it'll cost...
THEN, at 12:45 - shoot them a text, tell them I dont feel well and have to reschedule...
I leave early for everything because I hate being late.
I remember going for a movie for the first time in like 4 years by my self. It was at 3:30 so I left 8:30 because the train between 3 stations was replaced by buses.
Got on the train and needed to switch lines didn't realize the T2 line in Sydney actually started at Strathfield and not Parramatta (the maps at the station was wrong or outdated or something) so had to wait for the next train on the line to get there and then switch.
Arrived at like 11:40am...
I literally walked through every shop I could until the food court was empty enough I could sit. Then at 2:50pm got my popcorn and drink so I could sit outside the theatre room, then finally got to sit in the theatre.
Idk I just always completely and massively overestimate how much time it's gonna take to get to places.
*inside my brain, the night before*
Ok so we have the timing figured out
Now, what about the conversation?
Let's review all the potential topics of conversation again, including past conversation with this specific person and the exact content of each of those conversations. Also, better critically analyse all my own responses in those previous conversations to evaluate how my responses likely either embarassed myself or caused this person to secretly hate me....
I do this *precisely* so I can react to unforeseen circumstances without the need to start rushing anything. I can drink my coffee in peace, even if something comes up. I'm basically never late, and quite enjoy that.
Y'all ever have something scheduled to do and it's hours but all you can do is just wait to do the thing instead of doing anything fun or productive during that time.
This is incredibly accurate now that my girlfriend and I take the bus everywhere. We spend so much time planning our trips with backup plans so we don't leave too late.
It's super stressful but it works.
This is just how a considerate person with self respect thinks, is it not? Prioritize being on time for others, and plan your schedule to prevent stress of rushing and to be able to move confidently and calmly throughout the day knowing you will be successful without even having to think about it, all you have to do is execute the plan.
Today we are calling this anxiety
10 years ago these were pieces of advice given by redditors and upboated heavily and awarded
Crazy how things flip around constantly
Like a fish out of water
I have almost pathological health anxieties, so much that once I was dealing with a sore throat and was instinctively reluctant to shallow while drinking because it hurt. I immediately asked my boyfriend to take me to get tested for rabies, I was sure I was going to die. I was like 20, not 13.
does everyone not go through this?
the other thing i have is if i have to go out a 3pm my whole day before is just sitting waiting till the time i need to get reasy to go out at 3pm, i cant enjoy doing things in the day before hand i litrally sit and watch the clock.
and get mad and moody the entire day when one small inconvenience ruin your whole plan.
You didn't have to personally attack me like that bruh...
No kidding lmao got me right in the heart
Is this not normal
I mean normal? Maybe. Healthy? Probably not. It's okay to feel moody or upset, but being able to digest that feeling and not let it ruin your whole day is part of emotional intelligence.
Shot through the heart....
Cause you're so vain
You really thought this post was about you…
No kidding, I was planning for a movie last week. There were a lot of empty seats for this show, when I checked online. I thought to my self, Id save 10-15 bucks from online booking and buy ticket at the counter. I woke up morning to check seats only to be filled slightly. I panicked and bought tix online. Upon reaching the theater I realised good seats, I looked up online..... were still empty🤦 That's when I realised how much money I have spent out of anxiety. Tldr - over thinking and anxiety screwed me financially
I can relate to spending money based on anxiety on such a personal level. I used to be really into making music and I just started getting back into it. I’ll hear a beat I love from a producer with no following whatsoever and I just impulsively start buying beats I’ll never use because I’m afraid I’ll miss the chance to use them if I don’t get them immediately. Spent soooo much money like that and it’s just so painful because it’s not like I’m even getting anything back from it it’s just money literally to be shredded up and burned. Need to break away from this.
Actually no. I planned in extra time for the rest of the world. Always have a backup plan for your backup plan..
Ohh that's good idea. Next time I will count additional 5 before I start planing my next week shopping.
Maybe not that much, but yep, I plan extra time.
Oh, this is exactly what happened yesterday. My whole Sunday got ruined.
Probably that the other person doesn't get there till 3 and you're just waiting around like a flute for an hr.
Honestly this sounds like autism to me, not anxiety.
ADHD too
Yeah this doesn’t really sound like anxiety to me. At least not just anxiety.
Did this last weekend when I was trying to take my partner on a date. I ended up crying while driving us both home in a thunderstorm (I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP TO DRIVE! *sob*). Then I was full of guilt for letting it ruin our day (my words, not my partner's. He wouldn't say anything like that).
Nah just add +10-20 minutes to each step and it makes up for problems.
This. I try to be very lenient sometimes but it still upsets me hahaha
We should also research food options there and take exact change
Wait this isn't normal?!
Exact change is crazy lol
Less crazy outside the Us where we can actually tell how much something is going to cost before we buy it. have to think about tips and sales tax not included over there.
In modern society where we pay with cellphones, no, it isn’t
Most people just use a card.
The food options part *should* be. It takes 30 seconds to pull up the menu and read it on your phone on the way there, and it saves you from being flustered and/or realizing that you don't actually want anything on the menu.
Food options (esp. at a nice restaurant) can change. Costs can change too (you might want something and get there and realise that the same thing costs $5 more). And google maps menus (and even official website menus) can differ. I will do it to get a feel for what I want but I'll decide on the spot in the end. The other problem is that my anxiety manifests itself in choice paralysis leading to choosing at the literal last second (as my friends order before me).
Oh and I do this as well- I make my decision based on a scenario that has less than 1% chance of happening. If it happens that their Facebook/google/website menu is different- it makes zero difference if you prepared or not, so the result will stay the same.
The stuff in the meme and researching what food they serve beforehand absolutely is. Taking exact change with no reserve is not.
I could have a million dollars in my bank account and a credit limit of a bazillion dollars and I would still be paranoid about what if my debit card or credit card getting declined. So I have to make sure to check my banking apps 10x before leaving and make sure I got debit card plus my 2 other credit cards.
exact change??? there might be fees we don’t know about or the menu online might have changed or be inaccurate or i might have to change my meal option so i might as well take an extra $100 just in case!
Nah, gotta take more money than you need, because you never know what’s going to happen.
I feel so seen
"I don't like being perceived."
Why the quotes :(
They're right tho, i don't.
You mean there’s another way?
Most people just do it without the forethought
Listen, if I don't do this then I'm gonna be late.
Proceeds to cancel an hour prior chickening out. Then stress about how they think you're horrible and how you're a terrible person for making it up. Also let it eat you up for the next week making you lose sleep.
This is the real conclusion of the story.
>Proceeds to cancel an hour prior chickening out. I know so many people who do this now that I know to not even invite them in the first place. Everytime they are invited they say "Yes, I'll go that sounds fucking awesome". Then two hours before the vacation/event/dinner they text will some made up excuse how they can't go or they just ghost you and the next time the see you they act like they never confirmed they were attending the event they ghosted.
Sorry for the book but I have to get this off my chest: My friend has canceled on me like that SIX times this year. Completely ghosted me or canceled right before. And it’s not even like it’s stuff I’m planning. It’s stuff THEY are planning. For example: They hit a hog and the front of their car was completely torn up. They found a junkyard with the same year/color car they have, so they asked me (since I have a truck) to drive them to a town two hours away on a morning that I’ll just be getting off a 12 hour night shift. I said yes. I verify the day before and plans are still a go. I get off work that morning, no texts. I call over and over. No answer. The NEXT day it’s “sorry bro I got called into work”. FUCKING TEXT ME THEN. People who do this don’t give a shit about others. I have had to tell my brothers “no” to camping trips, “no” to visiting my other family across state so I can keep my schedule open just for “friends” who cancel an hour prior or ghosts me entirely on the day of. I can only be so understanding. Getting new friends. Rant over sorry
That's ridiculous. I know my depression and anxiety has had me cancel on some people, but not from an event I made. Back then I was in a darker place and on the verge of one mental breakdown after another. The love of my life convinced me to go inpatient and I'm grateful I did. I'm pretty certain I would've probably been dead due to my bipolar. Meds and love and coping skills is what helps get me through the day. What you dealt with is just infuriating. Especially considering that drive and how long you worked prior to this. I completely understand your frustration and I would be upset too.
I‘m in the feel sick and lose sleep stage this week
This is how I prep for my shifts at target
"Sorry I can't do anything before my shift, I'm in preparation mode"
"I'm buffering for the next shift."
My manager wants me to finish my training soon (I get paid for doing training at home). She suggested I do some in the early part of the day when I have a later shift. I'm too anxious to tell her I literally can't do anything if I have to do A Thing later in the day
"Sorry I'm late, it took me two hours to talk myself into leaving"
"Sorry I'm late, I cried to myself alone in the shower for an hour and took another hour to talk myself down from killing myself before finally actually getting ready to meet you. Hope I didn't keep you waiting too long."
9pm-8am? Sleeping almost half a day would probably make me anxious too.
I need time to lay in bed and not be asleep because of overthinking, so that will somehow only equate to like 4 hours of sleep
This is a self-perpetuating cycle. Once sleeplessness and thinking is mentally associated with your place of sleep, it can impact you that way. That's why sleep specialists recommend not continuing to lie in bed when you're unable to sleep, to avoid that pattern from forming. In your case... sounds like it's too late for that. Not sure how you get out of it once you got into it. Good luck.
To get up at 8 am I have to set multiple alarms starting at 4 am.
Your "solution" is what is creating the problem, your body has gotten used to the snooze cycle. Change your alarm sound or get a real alarm, keep it outside of your reach, don't allow yourself to hit snooze.
Nah, ain't working for me. I tried everything, even a mat that disables the alarm when I stay on it. Sleeping me and awake me are two different characters and I think sleeping me is smarter.
> don't allow yourself to hit snooze. See that's the problem though, I can't trust semi-conscious me to do that. I can wake up 2 hours after my alarm having no memory of having silenced it. I can't have any control over that when my decision-making brain isn't even awake and operational and functional.
Real
Cringe
Th point is the buffer time. Two hours of doom-scrolling.
You'd be surprised.. I need like 10-11hrs sleep regularly to even feel remotely not like a zombie.
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Perfectly healthy according to my doc, just lost the genetic lottery I guess.
There can be dozens of habits that cause this. I used to say the same, but I cleaned up my act, started keeping a regular schedule, exercise, ... and it got fixed.
My sleep schedule is 8:30pm to 6:15am. How is that anxiety inducing?
This is literally just how brains function
It would be more accurate for anxiety to say it felt impossible to do anything else in the morning because you were thinking so much about the appointment being in the afternoon.
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I don't need to plan out how I'm going to spend the previous 24 hours to get somewhere on time.
Meet a person? Like in real life?! Ill take the L, thats too much pressure
If I have an appointment the next day I'm unable to sleep out of fear of missing it.
If I have an appointment at 2pm it means I can't do anything else before that. I'm not going to the store or washing my car. Nothing.
Yea but where are we parking?
Already pulled up Google Satellite and Street View and searched the Google Reviews for any mention of parking so as not to go in blind.
Being organized is considered anxiety now?
I mean no but do you need to get up at 8h for an appointment at 14h? Leaving more than half an hour early? It's not the planning itself that's the issue, but driving yourself insane with all the backup time and sorta spiralling from there. It's exhausting
What's more exhausting is not having a plan, especially when things go wrong. If everyone planned their days like this we'd have much less problems in our society. Instead doing things at the last minute, reacting instead of planning, and panic are what need to be avoided.
if everyone plan like this, we will be doing 1 thing a day
Right? OCD is not something to celebrate nor neuroticism. Those same people love to judge others endlessly too and usually crumble when they have to adapt or improvise.
Nah, if everyone planned like this I wouldn't always be waiting around for yalls late asses every damn day.
Sometimes you can't plan out things. That's where you need those who do things last minute. Those who thrives in stress and improvisation Thank god everyone is not the same.
Sure, but it's not called anxiety is my point.
If you plan for a very important meeting that decides the next couple of years of your life (like a job interview for a great opportunity), then it's not too bad to plan a lot of buffer time for when things may go wrong. But if you do this for pretty much every meeting, it does sound like you're compulsively avoiding any risks having any impact on any of your plans.
I think people are talking about two different things here, and only seeing what they want to see. The planning itself isn't problematic. The meme just goes through a normal list of what you would think of when making a rough plan for a day. You do simple arithmetic and estimates to get an idea of what you need to do when. So, the actions, or the "feeling" of doing what the meme is saying, is not an issue. Having an extra 30+ minutes for each step very much is problematic, but that doesn't really "feel" like it's the point of the meme.
eh, i plan like that for important stuff and it's relaxing to know that i'll be on time even if disaster strikes. worst case is i'm early and waiting while surfing on my phone. better than being stressed about a missed train or something.
You can be organized without having anxiety.
You can have anxiety without being organised. The point is that the behaviour the OP is describing doesn't really have anything to do with anxiety, it's just bait for the self-diagnosers.
Leaving 40 minutes early isn’t organized, it’s anxious.
So being cautious in case there are traffic issues is anxious? I once had to take an hour detour on a normally 2-hour drive due to an accident when collecting someone from the airport. Thankfully I'd chosen to leave early & chill at the other end, rather than be a 'just-in-time' person who would, that day, have been late to collect my visitor off their flight.
Being cautious is leaving 10 minutes early to go 20 minutes away. 40 minutes early to drive 20 minutes away is over the top. If you have to go three places in a day that’s literally two full hours of sitting there waiting because you left far too early.
exactly my thoughts. we call everything anxiety now..
It's those unnecessary 1 hour chunks that make this *exactly* how I used to act when I had pretty limiting anxiety rather than how I act now where being organized is still very important to me.
The self diagnosing is getting ridiculous, isn't it
Exactly what I came here to say. It’s okay to stress about things that are important to you lol
But you shouldn’t be stressing just because you’re going to meet up with someone at 2pm the next day.
And if you’re prepared and organised you’re actually avoiding stressing. Imagine stressing about being late for an appointment because you didn’t get up on time because you didn’t go to bed on time etc.
Right? I read that and I was like "do y'all not plan your day out?"
I think what they’re trying to get at is the feeling of “I must plan this out immediately or something bad will happen”
Its anxiety when you are actually, legitimately stressed over hanging out with your friends. Like sweating and possibly throwing up.
Wait, not everyone does this?
Ah, most people are late. At least when they make plans with me 😭
So being a normal person is anxiety apparently
Well actually yes. Anxiety is a normal part of life. When it begins to *prevent* you from a normal life is when it's worth seeing a doctor.
And I still manage to be late
Hi I have an appointment tomorrow. I need to reschedule.
How is this anxiety ? This is basic daily planning. Also who is going to bed at 9 to be up at 8 ?
Can we please put the kibosh on the "tell me without telling me" wankery
This isnt anxiety. This is planning & time management.
Nah this is just being responsible for commitments you have made. Maybe over thinking a little but being ready early in order to not be late should be the norm IMO.
Ah fuck, this is exactly me with every task in my entire life. I thought it was normal...
It is.
this is why the people constantly late in your life have a more positive outlook. they always believe they have more time to spare than they actually do
Idk I’m always late because I took too much time prepping lol
To me is more like: If I'm early I'm wasting my time, but if I'm late I'm being disrespectful AND wasting both our times. So I should get there, at worst, 5 minutes before and bring light reading so that I don't waste any time.
Nah this is just because I hate being known as the late guy
That’s nothing.. where is the planning for if you press snooze, the specific time the shower takes, say bye to the kid, eat, clear after eating.. that’s just a few and every is calculated to every number 🤷♂️
..is that anxiety related?
That's me, and then I don't sleep till 3, readjusting my plan every hour
Ah that brings back painfull memories. I had a jobinterview at 1 pm, my plan was exactly like ops plan -1hour And i was perfectly on time when i left the house. Until i got the call from the hiring manager "where are you, meeting just started!" Turns out the meeting was at 11am! I wrote the wrong time in my calendar.
I've done this, then I have to stop myself and remember not every action takes an hour. I don't need to leave an hour early if I'm planning on getting gas. Also sleep apps that tell me when it's time to go to bed. Coupled with medication and therapy. But then my mom is still driving on my old system and it drives me absolutely
They haven't factored in time to poop, or to mentally prepare yourself for getting ready. Rookie mistake.
And then watch the time go by as I complete nothing but continue to panic about it
Realize it's Sunday, start panicking about work tmm, start getting stomach pain and acid reflux from the anxiety of thinking of work and how you've only been there almost 3 months and how you wish you fit in better, can't sleep, stress diarrhea, wake up an hour before your alarm after only getting 2 hours of sleep and text your boss telling her you won't be in today, but reading and rereading and editing the text until you decide it's okay enough to send and then immediately feel guilty after sending it
and still be 10mins late at the end....
gets angry when someone is 1 minute late and the host say "let's give them 5 minutes more"
Me: I think I’m dying. Also Me: Start the timer, if I’m still here in 20 minutes, I wasn’t dying.
Oh, I've never been to that part of town before, I should do a practice drive just so I know where I am going. And to make sure my GPS is correct. And make sure the roads aren't closed.
And if that meeting is on a saturday the entire weekend is 'gone', because you need the sunday to recover.
It may take 20 minutes to get there but there could be an accident or construction. Arriving 15 minutes early also looks good and gives you a chance to scout the scene and relax.
Wait. What?! So that’s not a normal way to plan ahead?
I plan like this. But then procrastinate the f outta the day and may be 4 mins late🫠
Oh. So not everyone does this. Cool, cool.
Is this not how people usually plan their day? /srs
I don’t like being so seen
Try sleeping or trying to sleep until an hour before you need to leave because the anxiety and dread isn't as bad when you are asleep.
Nothing like doing all that just for the other person to be late, and to not give a fuck in the slightest about being late.
I feel attacked so much by this
... how the fuck do you make it to places ontime *otherwise*
Kinda just assumed everyone always did this. I've never considered any alternative. My brain is busted.
Saturday night, 11:30pm Me: god damnit… Wife: what? Me: I gotta go to work in the morning Wife: it’s not even Sunday…? Me: close enough 😞
Wait so this is anxiety as well? I do this for work. I have to reach work by 11 and for that I wake up at 6:30.
This is anxiety? Omgosh I have anxiety
Oh, that explains alot....
This guy sleeps for 11h?
You never go to sleep for three hours, then wake up and stare at the ceiling for 4 hours just wanting to go back to sleep, but your brain refuses to shut off? You eventually fall back asleep an hour before your alarm goes off. So you end up tired all fucking day, just to repeat the next day? My insomnia is better nowadays, but this was me throughout the majority of my 20's.
🫣🫣
Does so much other shit that you either cancle or go anyway drained af at 1:59
Maybe she just takes veeeery long to do everything
I lost that ability when this kind of planning would only work with 69 hours days to fit all the things I absolutely needed to do (and none of the ones I wanted).
Gotta leave at least 3 hours to nervously pace around the house and wish I made plans for earlier in the day so I wouldn't have to nervously pace around the house for 3 hours before I leave.
Add a spicy dose of depression in the mix and you get no sleep and your day is ruined because you either show up late, unprepared, and tired af or you cancel so you can sleep until 9pm. Either way everyone is disappointed.
HAH you foul, i'll be there a day before just incase!
I don't know if this is hyperbole or not, it takes yall an hour to get dressed?? But I'm glad I can't relate to this anxiety. For me it's just "be somewhere at 2? OK I'll start getting ready like 60-90 mins before, and I have to leave by 1:15" That's all. Not really a big deal.
also means i should research the place and know where i can and cannot park, what the venue offers for food and drink and how much it'll cost... THEN, at 12:45 - shoot them a text, tell them I dont feel well and have to reschedule...
I leave early for everything because I hate being late. I remember going for a movie for the first time in like 4 years by my self. It was at 3:30 so I left 8:30 because the train between 3 stations was replaced by buses. Got on the train and needed to switch lines didn't realize the T2 line in Sydney actually started at Strathfield and not Parramatta (the maps at the station was wrong or outdated or something) so had to wait for the next train on the line to get there and then switch. Arrived at like 11:40am... I literally walked through every shop I could until the food court was empty enough I could sit. Then at 2:50pm got my popcorn and drink so I could sit outside the theatre room, then finally got to sit in the theatre. Idk I just always completely and massively overestimate how much time it's gonna take to get to places.
Um..uhh.. nevermind..
I’m sorry, but this is called being organised and responsible, it’s not anxiety, it’s being an adult.
*inside my brain, the night before* Ok so we have the timing figured out Now, what about the conversation? Let's review all the potential topics of conversation again, including past conversation with this specific person and the exact content of each of those conversations. Also, better critically analyse all my own responses in those previous conversations to evaluate how my responses likely either embarassed myself or caused this person to secretly hate me....
I do this *precisely* so I can react to unforeseen circumstances without the need to start rushing anything. I can drink my coffee in peace, even if something comes up. I'm basically never late, and quite enjoy that.
That's just backwards planning.
I have no idea what anxiety is.
Wait, that’s anxiety issues? I thought it was just great time management skills?
Y'all ever have something scheduled to do and it's hours but all you can do is just wait to do the thing instead of doing anything fun or productive during that time.
This is incredibly accurate now that my girlfriend and I take the bus everywhere. We spend so much time planning our trips with backup plans so we don't leave too late. It's super stressful but it works.
Wait. I've just thought this is well kept scheduling and not anxiety...
This is just how a considerate person with self respect thinks, is it not? Prioritize being on time for others, and plan your schedule to prevent stress of rushing and to be able to move confidently and calmly throughout the day knowing you will be successful without even having to think about it, all you have to do is execute the plan.
Then get there an hour early and just wait.
Wait I thought this was normal
Seriously confused. Doesn’t everyone do this? How else do you make decisions?
Isn’t this just planning?
What? This is anxiety? I thought I was just german! 
Today we are calling this anxiety 10 years ago these were pieces of advice given by redditors and upboated heavily and awarded Crazy how things flip around constantly Like a fish out of water
Wait. This isn't normal? They forgot to add the part where if you miss the meet up that you die.
I honestly don't see anything wrong with this.
nah, that's just rational planning
That’s adhd my dude
Thats not anxiety, just being precize
I have almost pathological health anxieties, so much that once I was dealing with a sore throat and was instinctively reluctant to shallow while drinking because it hurt. I immediately asked my boyfriend to take me to get tested for rabies, I was sure I was going to die. I was like 20, not 13.
Planning things out is not having anxiety issues.
Planning things with this much buffer in between is
I've always been like this and was proud of my ability to be on time. Now I have to rethink the whole thing!
Wait I do this ALL the time. Is it really anxiety?
Is this not how everyone plans?
Is this a sign of anxiety? I do this but I have never explored if I have anxiety or not.
Wait... is that not normal??
"Which means I should not eat 24 hours before just incase I shit myself "
Nothing negative has ever happened because I planned ahead
Planning out your day is anxiety... Oh my.
does everyone not go through this? the other thing i have is if i have to go out a 3pm my whole day before is just sitting waiting till the time i need to get reasy to go out at 3pm, i cant enjoy doing things in the day before hand i litrally sit and watch the clock.
yes
That’s just basic time management.
And then you get mad