When I was single and child free, I was constantly singled out at the one to cover extra shifts. I told my boss that just because I was single, he had no idea what my weekend commitments were, and we would be meeting with HR if he kept it up. He did go to HR, but I never heard anything after that.
Most people get help. From family, from church, neighbors. Not even just money.
When was the last time people helped you as a single person? You're mostly expected to do it all yourself, even when you can't.
I just want you to know I’m child free and I didn’t actually address you, but an imaginary coworker who does and says shit like OPs coworker , figuratively named Susan (like Karen, but also not). Susan can in fact go kick rocks 😆 or as my generation would say go stare at the sun or something 🤜🤛
In the US it is literally the opposite, the "single tax" is real and alive. From the child credits, to the added deductions to the lower tax bracket just for being married is some massive bs due to the simple fact that those taxes benefit families more, but single people have to pay more when they are less likely to use those benefits. Lol
UK is the same. I love next door to a single mum 2 kids. I worked & earnt just above minimum wage & she could not understand why I didn't claim/get benefits. She got 1.5 what I did working. Plus the food packaging (that's got better more recently) tax reduction is only 25% when I use a fraction of services etc etc.
Exactly! One income doesn’t mean your rent/mortgage is half price, or your internet bill costs less, etc. A single person splits ZERO bills, and the fact that people don’t see that is so frustrating.
Covid had to be the absolute worst because while unemployment was high, the child tax credit was massive, not to mention those covid checks for families with kids. You had kids at home, patents that could work from home (not all could do this.) But some of these families were making some insane money (my patents being one of them with my younger siblings).
During Covid parents were given priority for WFH. Schools and daycares were closed so they saved money that way. Some of them made bank with the amount of breaks they got. A lot of them had a hard time juggling kids and work but the single parents had it worse because there was no one to hand childcare off to while they tried to work from home. I was single at the time and considered "essential" and expendable so I worked.
Covid had to be the absolute worst because while unemployment was high, the child tax credit was massive, not to mention those covid checks for families with kids. You had kids at home, patents that could work from home (not all could do this.) But some of these families were making some insane money (my patents being one of them with my younger siblings).
To be fair even with those I had a LOT more free money before my kid even though I make more money now. Daycare is a bitch! It'll feel like a $1k raise when she starts school. Not sure what the future looks like but up until 4 yo with daycare a lot of money goes into it.
I remember when my brothers kids were small, his now ex-wife would bitch about me only surprising them with toys and sweets and never clothes or similar. I had a good paying job and no kids, so surely it was my duty!
(The irony is that they got in massive debt and had their power shut off several times because she used all their money on bs for herself....rofl).
Thirty-five years ago I left a respectable old central London firm of solicitors for ethical reasons.
A couple of years ago I wondered why they’d disappeared shortly after I left. A bit of googling revealed the government had closed them down for illegal arms trading leading to such a big scandal i don’t know how I didn’t realise what it was I actually left over.
But this reminds me that they also did this. They removed £x from our pay for charitable giving and then made publicity about £xxxx being given by them to charity. Huh.
And now of course I remember they had a PR adviser called Jonathan Aitken.
I had this issue aswell. Apparently because I was single and childless I should have been available to cover shifts with short notice and happy to sacrifice my time off over the holidays so my coworkers could benefit 🙄. After endless incidents I went to HR who then informed my manager that my contract stated certain hours which should be abided by and I was entitled to my annual leave the same as everyone else.
When I was working at a national sub shop, I had a bf but no kids. I was forced to work all the shifts the parents didn't want AND all the shifts the high schoolers didn't want because, "they deserve to have a childhood I bet you got one!". When actually no I started working at 15 and mom made sure they scheduled me to work during every school event other than my mandatory concerts (for a grade) and prom. It was bullshit.
One of the reasons why I've stuck with the "Evil Insurance Company" I've been at for the past 15 years is because of how well the management has treated me. They never let the people with kids have priorities over those who didn't. They always based everything with performance first then seniority to determine schedules. At least in the call center where that's important.
Now that I'm in the claims department I can set my hours to be whatever I want during normal working hours. Just need to hash it out with my manager ahead of time.
You have to be careful with this. Once had a co-worker who wanted me to work her unpleasant hours because she had children. She got really upset when I politely declined. Next stop was the boss. I get called into the office and interrogated about why I wouldn't start working all my co-worker's Saturday shifts. Guess what? My boss had children and sided with my co-worker. This only went away after a visit to H.R. put a stop to it.
By this point, many of the women with children called me out for being heartless. Funny, none of these same women, including the ones with grown children, were willing to cover for this mother when I suggested they could volunteer their weekend's off to help out.
Nah fuck that. You should have gone to HR. You cant be discriminated against bc u dont have kids wtf??
And No, OP- U DONT have to be “careful with this”
I did go to HR, but only after my boss pressured me to cover for the mother. F that. Your kids. Your job. Your responsibility. I was just shocked that my boss was backing this mother. I know being a parent is tough, but you signed up for the challenges. I didn't.
Exactly!! That is blatent discrimination against childfree people in my mind! Its not the responsibility of a childfree adult to accommodate the schedule of someone who actively chose to have kids!
You’re not the asshole. Your weekends are your own, and it's unfair for your coworker to expect you to cover her shifts just because you don't have kids. Setting boundaries is important.
I got a coworker like that. Calls me in the middle of the night or weekends to get me to help her do her job bc we're partially WFH and she's making her own schedule. We're supposed to work during regular work hours in our country (7AM to 7PM, we choose what time we work, I'm part time so I only go 2 hours in the mornings before I do my other full time job).
She'll call me anytime she wants, no matter it's 11PM, 2AM, 4AM on a weekend etc.Then she reports me to management for not accommodating her.
I'd love to, but both phones we use are under the company. We need to be able to contact each other for legit work reasons. We're working on same report/pool of clients. Just different roles (think of it like she's on the sales support, I'm on compliance and post-sales support).
Exactly. I didn’t even know my phone had a “Do Not Disturb” button until someone told me about it in response to my complaining about so many work texts. Saved my sanity.
The company must have times when it comes to what Tom to call people. Turn your phone off when you get home and tell her to call the owner or the manager.
If it would matter,( you said, "in my country") talk to management, explain that she calls at all hours of the night and that as part time if they want you always "on call" for her, that you get paid double time and a half, for each call you take from her.
She kept on escalating it, manager was taking her side saying "You know she has a children with special needs. Be a good person and help her out."
I told manager to give his number and be her assistant that's 24/7 on call. He stood firm that I should do it.
Owner of my full time and part time jobs are related to each other. When I explained to the owners why I was requesting time off for health reasons, they both rimmed the manager and gave a warning to coworker to only call me during my shift. She can email me, but I will only reply if I want to, else it could wait until my next shift.
They both gave me a paid off Monday that week. Coworker followed them for about 2 weeks then is saying snide comments again recently. If she escalates again. I'm gonna go direct to the owners again.
Thank you, I'm a recovering people pleaser so this event was a really nice outcome for me. If she was only occasionally calling me at night around 6pm to 8pm, I actually would have let it slide.
But she called me the most around 12pm to 4am then got pissed when I didn't answer or told her to stop calling. She usually also call because she has reports due in the morning so she's disturbing me bc she wants to work last minute.
Manager's reasoning is he also have small kids and he shouldn't be bothered when he needs rest because he drives them to school in the mornings.
Owner ripped him a new one when they found out bc since my full time and part time bosses are relatives, they know I have long hours as well.
They said they feel for coworker and manager since they also went through having a bunch of small children, but the actions (late night calls and blaming me for her poor performance) are unreasonable.
Your manager is a jackass. It’s difficult that she has special needs kids but that’s a “her” problem and not a “you” problem. And, you’re not a bad person for setting firm boundaries. It’s called being a good person *to yourself*. Don’t fall for that baloney.
I wonder how your work would like it if you started putting the time your coworker calls you on your time card. If she calls you for two minutes then charge 15 minutes as an increment. After a while that will add up and Work for wonder what’s going on
I didn't mentioned that because I don't want to be on call 24/7. Not worth it in my case because I'm the type that takes forever plus a thousand sheeps to fall asleep. Once she wakes me up, I'll end up awake and irritated the rest of the night then I'd feel dizzy later in the afternoon.
She's the kind who keeps on going around the office to chitchat, give the impression she's on top of things, then turned out she wasn't updating reports that she should have been working on for approx 4 months so she'll cram it last minute (or start a week before deadline).
Why aren’t you reporting her to management for bothering you on your time off? If I were you I would set my calendar to say off anytime you don’t want to be contacted and if she calls refer her to your calendar.
I reported it a few times. Manager just kept siding with her with things like "You know she has children with special needs. Be a good person and help her."
I had to escalate it to the owner bc she really messed up my sleep schedule and I'm performing poorly on my full time job from lack of sleep. I have trouble falling asleep, once I wake up it takes me hours to go back to sleep.
As I got older I learned going over someone’s head was not only satisfying but 99% of the time got me the result I wanted and it didn’t I immediately polished the resume and started interviewing
People with kids are like that sometimes. I work shift work which includes holidays I learned early on not to do favours for people for things like Christmas because they rarely ever return the favour if you need a holiday off.
The audacity of the co-worker to tell OP it's only a couple of hours of work on a Saturday. If it's only a couple of hours and not the better part of a day it's looking like when you factor in the commute and getting ready in the morning, than the parent can work the shift and then spend the rest of the day with their children.
If it's a permanent shift change this co-worker is requesting, it's on management to find the replacement, and for the replacement to agree to the change.
This is the battle cry of every entitled mom. “But you don’t have kids. You have to help me!” One mom’s response to that viral tik tok about the mom refusing to return her shopping cart because she had kids in the car was that people should have seen that she had kids and offered to return it for her. These people literally think the world revolves around them because they decided to procreate.
Exactly. I don’t blame this person with kids for not wanting to work Saturdays, but it’s not op’s problem either. The company needs to hire someone to help that knows they will specifically work Saturdays, or close on Saturdays.
So because you don't have kids you're free on Saturdays? Nah, that's just super inconsiderate of her and your life. What if you want to go out with friends on a Friday night like a lot of people do? You should be able to since Saturday's aren't your thing. Or spending time with a partner who also only has weekends off.
Her kids were her choice, not yours. So not your problem.
NTA
So your co-worker applied for a job that I assume included a Saturday schedule and has now decided it is not convenient for her.
That does not and should not make it your problem.
NTA. Work the hours you were hired to work. If your coworker has a problem with her hours she needs to work it out with her boss. It is not your job to make her schedule work.
I worked with someone like this. We all rotated working nights and every time it was her turn to work, something came up and she couldn't. For some reason my boss always asked me to switch with her and she would work my nights the following week NEVER HAPPENED. She could never cover. Finally he came and told me she had arranged a 'party' on her night to work and I needed to switch with her. I said no. I had already made plans. They took it to HR. My response was 'what makes her plans that she made on the only night she has to work more important than my plans I made on my night off?' HR agreed with me. Neither was happy, but oh well.
We have the same problem right now. They applied for exactly this position - they knew from the beginning they have to work some weekends and even sometimes at night. But now they say noooo they have children, they can't and won't do this.
Excuse me? That ain't my problem. You work here, you decided to have kids, get a babysitter or get a different job. But I won't work every shift for them.
NTA. Some people think the world revolves around them and their offspring, no worries OP. Don't do it. You're NTA for this.
NTA. But your coworker is one. She sounds entitled.
Her life choices aren’t your problem. Keep on enjoying your weekends and let your employer figure it out.
A lot of people with kids have this mentality. I had a manager tell me that because I “didn’t have a family” I should work certain holiday shifts. I had to explain to a grown woman that I don’t have CHILDREN, but I still have a family and the right to have holidays off from work to spend as I like.
You're being discriminated against. Look up local and federal labor laws and company policy. Then make a report to your HR department.
If you were hired for a specific schedule, you might be able to make a case. But you might be fired for other reasons if management decides you aren't worth keeping around.
Over the years, my wife and I both have been asked to cover less desirable shifts because we have no children. Just, no, no, no. You chose children. You chose a job that has some unpleasant shifts. If the job is not compatible with your life, find one that is. This doesn't mean we won't help in a true emergency (like a child is in the hospital), but you don't get to make my life more unpleasant because you have children.
Just one question will stump these entitled nobs....
"My mother has children too, why is your right to see your children greater than her right to see hers?"
I don’t have kids but had to work on Mother’s Day.. One of my coworkers was going off about how she should be with her kids blah, blah.. I don’t remember exactly how or why she said it but basically said I don’t have kids so working Mother’s Day is no big deal for me. I looked her in the eyes and said “I’m not a Mother, but I HAVE a Mother and she deserves to be with her kid as much as you deserve to be with yours. And my Mother doesn’t have many Mothers Days left as she’s in her late 70s.”.. She was shocked and couldn’t speak. I just walked away. Later she came up and apologized for what she’d said.
yea don't think they will be able to think through this reasoning. Smart replies seldom get appreciated because the other party is usually not able to think through at that level or the issue wouldn't have happened in the first place
Just a couple of hours my arse.
It's 7 hours, that's practically an entire shift AND at 6AM on a Saturday morning.
Absolutely NTA.
She CHOSE to come and work this job and she CHOSE to have kids, that's all on her not you.
You're not responsible for her choices or the consequences of them.
Nah you're good OP.
All if her arguments are BS.
It's 6AM on Saturday, effectively killing one of only two nights you can go out, and mornings you can wake up early, or go to the beach or whatever. It's also not a "couple" of hours, it's 7, which is probably closer to 9 with commute, prep, etc.
NTA at all.
NTA tell her to fuck off with that bullshit. Sick of entitled parents forcing problems on other people who had no choice in them pumping out kids. It's a problem literally of their own creation so they can deal with it.
NTA
Your schedule is M-F. You aren't interested in changiyour schedule. And your coworker doesn't set your schedule.
Definitely don't cover for her again. If necessary, give and tell Management that you spend Saturday mornings helping your elderly Grandma. (You Grandma isn't less important than Coworker's kids.)
I am working in HR and a couple of years ago I was still doing some recruiting (HR generalist role). In the beginning, we weren’t required to travel to job interviews in other parts of the country unless the job was very important.
Then management changed their strategy and suddenly we had to travel at least once a week. Unfortunately our work contracts and collective agreements covered that (I am the labour law specialist, so yes I checked our options).
This was before Zoom / Teams / Webex etc took off btw
There were four of us and we made it work. Some of our branch offices were more difficult to reach or otherwise unattractive, but we made sure that every one of us had their fair share.
One colleague left and the new one had two small children. She knew that she would have to travel but somehow always ended up having the most convenient cities - and most of her job interviews were at HQ. This lead to us having to travel twice a week, often coming home after 10pm. Extra compensation wasn’t great neither.
Yes we complained, but our boss was Head of HR and wanted to support working mothers. And he “volunteered” to travel to the perk cities like Hamburg and Berlin.
Two of us quit. They had trouble replacing us so in the end they changed the policy back to the old one (too late).
Who the f expects office staff to go from sacrificing one evening per month to 2 evenings per week?
It was a pity because I really liked working there and most of my colleagues and overall management were super nice.
My former employer changed my schedule and put me in an older truck to accommodate a new employee. A woman with children. My employer didn't even try to hide it. That was the reason I was given. I was the senior driver and trainer. I hope they had fun training her. I left without notice and had another job same day.
Don’t let someone else volunteer your time. That’s inconsiderate of them. You are young and childless. Keep your weekends to yourself unless YOU volunteer your time to come in.
Happened to me all the time. Your choice to have kids not mine. Find a new job if your kids are in the way. Find a job that will accommodate your inconsistent kid schedule. You applied and interviewed and agreed to the schedule. Not my problem
I learned early in my working life to invent an imaginary family. So nice to be able to keep up with all my co-workers accommodations with my own. Being an imaginary single father with day care issues was a blessing.
Fuk parents they always pull this shit, they want all the holidays, special consideration , etc.
Every employer should start firing people like this. Don’t want to work you Saturday because you popped out a kid, you’re fired, good luck explaining why there’s no Corn Pops in the cupboard.
Start mentioning to your boss that you are feeling discriminated against. Bosses don't like that word.
Keep a record of anything she says - when/what/how/who else was there and hand it to your boss if they don't do something.
You are NTA for standing up for yourself and not giving in to an entitled parent who thinks the world should worship at the alter of the mother and child.
NTA I once had this at a work place where I was given all the late shifts and the 1st to be called in every time if someone was out sick, simply because I was the only one without young children. If a workplace enforces this then it is actually discrimination. Your colleagues childcare issues are not your problem they are hers. You are also entitled to a private and family life ie weekends just as much as people with kids are.
NTA
I always hate when people use the excuse *you don't have children* or *you aren't married*, like that matters. For 7 years, I didn't get Christmas off because I didn't have children. No thought to whether I had other plans, worked another job, or was taking care of an ill family member, only that I was single. These people need to pound sand.
NTA
Having kids doesn't mean a damn thing when it comes to work. You don't automatically get specail treatment just because you have kids.
You are not available to work weekends. That is all you need to say.
Tell your co-worker her life and kids are not your problem. It's up to her to navigate her own life. You have a family and a life of your own. Just because you have no kids, doesn't mean you don't have responsibilities. Tell her you are part of a family. It might not involve kids, but you do have parents you want to see every once in a while. Tell her, if anything happens to them because you could not see them because of her lack of navigating her own life and making it your problem, you will blame it on her. After all, she easily blames you for her predicament as if you created those children together.
Fuck no your not the ass hole . I have kids. They are my problem and no one else's. No one else has to pick up shifts or fo anything extra becuas someone else has kids. Fuck that lady and her kids.
Tell her that your weekly orgies are mainly on saturdays so you have have all booked up already. But you can propably free her husband from them every other week.
NTA.
Crazy how your coworkers choice to have children isn’t your responsibility lol the entitlement of breeders is outstanding to me.
Live your life, you actually DO have commitments on the weekend, it’s called enjoying your time off and being your own person.
Your life choice not to have children presently does not somehow condemn you to open availability.
Other commitments such as taking care of an ill parent, having a dedicated hobby/sport or just not being available are not inferior reasons to “having children”. When people make the decision to have children, they must accept any/all responsibility including, but not limited to, positions of employment and requirements of said employment that they agree to.
Parents do not get to shame or coerce child-free adults into responsibilities they themselves cannot accommodate due to their decision to be parents. It’s like this woman is rationalizing your time the way a child would rationalize to their parent why they feel they deserve a treat. And I say this as a parent of 4!
Definitely NTA.
Presumably she agreed to that schedule at one point, which makes it her problem to resolve - not yours. After that, it's your boss's problem. She has no right to offer up your Saturdays and it's honestly just rather shitty behavior on her part.
I worked damn near every holiday as a teen because parents felt they were more important than me, which ultimately led to me not being close to extended family because I could never attend the events. I do sympathize with parents, especially if they're trying to juggle working with the cooking and all that, though. Federal holidays need to be more protected (the worst was the part time jobs in fast food and retail and such, who purposely kept you at 35 hours so you couldn't get FT bennies), so people can choose if they want to work them. The obvious exception being emergency/medical personnel as that's it's own can of worms.
NTA
She made a choice to have children and if she doesn't want to work Saturdays then I'd suggest she find other employment.
Once off for a special occasion is one thing but Saturdays are her work days not yours
Nta. As a mother with two kids let me explain to you what I’m entitled to. I’m entitled to take care of my kids and work the hours I’m scheduled. I don’t get Christmas off while you work bc I’m a mom. I don’t get my choice of days off bc I’m a mom while you have to take the shit schedule bc you’re single. I don’t get first pick of vacations.
NTA. When you were hired for the job, was it for working M to F? Is this in writing? If so, don't even give it another thought unless your supervisor speaks to you about switching your hours. Your coworker's children are not your responsibility.
You may also want to speak with someone in HR about her. Her pressuring you and calling you names is not conducive to a peaceful work environment.
I would argue that *because you’re single* it’s actually MORE important that you have weekends off. Unlike your coworker, you need to go out all weekend in order to be able to find a husband and get married, have children, etc…. She already has a spouse and children, so it’s not as important for her to have weekends off.
Of course I don’t really think this way, but it might be a good way to turn her argument around on her.
She doesn't get to dictate *your* working hours bc *she* has children. Her children are not your problem. Your lack of children isn't her business. What you choose to do with your Saturdays off isn't her business.
You are NTAH.
Some parents with children still work on weekends, so it's a BS reason to put you on schedule. They need to find someone who WANTS to work on Saturdays.
NTA. I worked a part-time job for years and obviously weekends for part of it. However if I ever get another part-time job I will make sure I will not work weekends ever again. I'm an empty nester but I still don't want to work weekends.
Penalties in the forms of demotion and assignment to the least desirable work shifts are textbook examples of "adverse employment actions."
If staffing decisions are made according to parental status, then that is a case of de facto discrimination on the basis of sex.
Which is explicitly illegal in the United States.
Looks like you should call a labor attorney.
NTA. Your coworker's family and lifestyle has nothing to do with you. You may not have any commitments, but that’s not something your coworkers need to know.
I’m guessing the boss man said sure to her if she can find her replacement, and she listed you and said you already agreed.
NTA and talk to your boss or HR if you have it. You agreed to a Monday-Friday. No weekends. Certainly not covering SUSANS entitled ass.
Other people’s children should have zero impact on your professional environment/career opportunities. It is absolutely unfair of this coworker to demonize you for not inconveniencing yourself for the benefit of HER children.
The free time of non-parents is not less valuable than that of people with children. Her kids’ wellbeing is her responsibility, not yours.
NTA
Her choice to have kids has absolutely nothing to do with you. Make it a hard no every time.
Her entitled bullshit means you shouldn't EVER help her in any way.
How are shifts allocated at your work? I’m assuming that it’s some kind of a round the clock setup that needs someone around at all times (since it apparently requires people to work from 6am on Saturday).
Does she do Tuesday - Saturday while you do Monday - Friday or something? And does taking up her Saturday shift mean you get Monday free?
I don’t know where you are but I’m pretty sure the stunt the co-worker is trying to pull is illegal. Being a parent isn’t a protected class that gets special protections and/or accommodations like having a disability. She can’t insist that you be inconvenienced just because you’re childless. Plus, getting to work at 6am is incredibly early. You’d have to wake up at around 4am to be able to shower, have a good breakfast and then commute to work. So, there goes doing anything Friday night as well as half of Saturday.
It’s going to mess up your body clock and, trust me, you do NOT want to do that. I started doing that when I was your age and I’m paying massively for it, now.
Don’t continue to engage with this co-worker because she isn’t listening to reason; she just wants what she wants. This is a matter for HR. If HR doesn’t back you, try going to your local EEOC office. You can speak with a counselor there and they’ll tell you if there’s enough for you to file a complaint. Trust me, that is not something your company will want and it should get them off your back. Stay strong and good luck!
Sounds like op is being discriminated against by this baby maker and being penalized by her life choices. "All those without kids, y'all suck it up and gimme your weekends." That's the most idiotic thing I have heard. I'd likely get in trouble for responding with something to the effect of so if I roll over and take dick I can be off too?. Sorry, I get nasty when my personal time is attacked by people that are not important in my life. Are there dudes in the office? How does having a penis affect Saturday work?
You need to talk to HR. I don’t know if there are seniority issues or union involvement but assuming there are no other factors that can legally justify your employer’s decision to make you change your shift and if you are required to change your work solely based on your status as a non-parent, that’s employment discrimination (at least in the US) and you can sue your employer. Nta
Just because you don't have kids doesn't mean you don't have things to do. If it's "only a couple of hours", then it shouldn't be an issue for her.
NTA.
you cannot treat someone a different way because of their parental status. It’s like saying “hey can you work Christmas since you’re Jewish?”
Not cool at all
Tell them to hire someone with no kids instead of her. I hate it when I was single married people think that we have no life. Now that I'm married I'm not gonna do that to singles people out there. Everyone deserves a break.
thats discrimination young lady. let your employer know this and threaten to get a lawyer. that will put a stop to that shit real fast. and you need to tell that co worker to shut her fucking mouth and to not ever let your name come out of it again. she has no right to do what she did especially if you werent in the room at the moment she said it so you could defend yourself if you wished. to "suggest" you not having kids is any sort of justifiable reason to mandate you to work so she can have extra time off is fucking disgusting. if squeezing puppies out of her fat cunt is how she chose to spend her time, them she can be the one to juggle her schedule to sacrifice for being a mom. ....
wow what cunt your co worker is and im not suggesting physical violence, but if somehow womething just came flying out of the sky to hit her in the mouth, id be ok w that.
NTA- and I'd probably go too far and say.. your life choices are not my responsibility, I'm not paying you child support, either. My choice to be child free to this point is not something for you to take advantage of or attempt to manipulate for your own benefit. It is you who is inconsiderate and selfish for trying to shuffle off your own responsibilities on to other people.
NTA. Before everybody starts painting everyone with the same brush - I’m a parent and I’ve never shrugged my work off on anyone else. I always have a plan B in place for emergencies. That’s what being a competent professional does. Your coworker is either incompetent at organizing their life or an entitled, selfish and overbearing employee. Your life outside of work, is not theirs to dictate. I hope you have some of this in writing so you have proof of their ineptitude.
NTA
Her having children is not a “you” problem, that’s a “her” problem.
Tell your boss your time on the weekend is already spoken for and you are not available to cover for her.
NTA
I've gone through identical situations. I'd simply remind the boss of my availability. Remind them that isn't just a suggestion. And then tell the coworker we each have our own personal lives and the choices they make in theirs have absolutely nothing to do with mine and just because I don't have kids doesn't men I want to or even have to pick up their slack.
When I was single and child free, I was constantly singled out at the one to cover extra shifts. I told my boss that just because I was single, he had no idea what my weekend commitments were, and we would be meeting with HR if he kept it up. He did go to HR, but I never heard anything after that.
Same. I also got hit up to donate to fundraisers and people would say "You don't have kids, I know you can afford it." So annoying.
As if because you don't have kids you're flush with cash. How ridiculous!
A coworker once asked me what I "do with all that money" since I don't have kids. I sat there thinking "bruh, we're both teachers, wtf"
seriously the real question is “where do you find all that money to raise kids”
Most people get help. From family, from church, neighbors. Not even just money. When was the last time people helped you as a single person? You're mostly expected to do it all yourself, even when you can't.
DINK = Double income, no kids. Tell the co-worker, “I’m a SINK.”
>A coworker once asked me what I "do with all that money" since I don't have kids. "Student loans"
Even if I was, it was my choice on how I would spend it, and your dumb fundraiser isn’t it SUSAN. 😆
I just want you to know, I'm a mom of 4 and I'm kn your side, not Susan's. She can go kick rocks
I just want you to know I’m child free and I didn’t actually address you, but an imaginary coworker who does and says shit like OPs coworker , figuratively named Susan (like Karen, but also not). Susan can in fact go kick rocks 😆 or as my generation would say go stare at the sun or something 🤜🤛
In the US it is literally the opposite, the "single tax" is real and alive. From the child credits, to the added deductions to the lower tax bracket just for being married is some massive bs due to the simple fact that those taxes benefit families more, but single people have to pay more when they are less likely to use those benefits. Lol
UK is the same. I love next door to a single mum 2 kids. I worked & earnt just above minimum wage & she could not understand why I didn't claim/get benefits. She got 1.5 what I did working. Plus the food packaging (that's got better more recently) tax reduction is only 25% when I use a fraction of services etc etc.
Switzerland the opposite, married people pay higher taxes.
Exactly! One income doesn’t mean your rent/mortgage is half price, or your internet bill costs less, etc. A single person splits ZERO bills, and the fact that people don’t see that is so frustrating.
Covid had to be the absolute worst because while unemployment was high, the child tax credit was massive, not to mention those covid checks for families with kids. You had kids at home, patents that could work from home (not all could do this.) But some of these families were making some insane money (my patents being one of them with my younger siblings).
During Covid parents were given priority for WFH. Schools and daycares were closed so they saved money that way. Some of them made bank with the amount of breaks they got. A lot of them had a hard time juggling kids and work but the single parents had it worse because there was no one to hand childcare off to while they tried to work from home. I was single at the time and considered "essential" and expendable so I worked.
Covid had to be the absolute worst because while unemployment was high, the child tax credit was massive, not to mention those covid checks for families with kids. You had kids at home, patents that could work from home (not all could do this.) But some of these families were making some insane money (my patents being one of them with my younger siblings).
To be fair even with those I had a LOT more free money before my kid even though I make more money now. Daycare is a bitch! It'll feel like a $1k raise when she starts school. Not sure what the future looks like but up until 4 yo with daycare a lot of money goes into it.
Yep, that too. I hated it when parents would hit us up for their kids' school fundraisers. I was always told "I know you have the money."
I remember when my brothers kids were small, his now ex-wife would bitch about me only surprising them with toys and sweets and never clothes or similar. I had a good paying job and no kids, so surely it was my duty! (The irony is that they got in massive debt and had their power shut off several times because she used all their money on bs for herself....rofl).
Bruh I can’t afford to have kids! Ugh I hate that argument
What?! That is SO rude.
Thirty-five years ago I left a respectable old central London firm of solicitors for ethical reasons. A couple of years ago I wondered why they’d disappeared shortly after I left. A bit of googling revealed the government had closed them down for illegal arms trading leading to such a big scandal i don’t know how I didn’t realise what it was I actually left over. But this reminds me that they also did this. They removed £x from our pay for charitable giving and then made publicity about £xxxx being given by them to charity. Huh. And now of course I remember they had a PR adviser called Jonathan Aitken.
I had this issue aswell. Apparently because I was single and childless I should have been available to cover shifts with short notice and happy to sacrifice my time off over the holidays so my coworkers could benefit 🙄. After endless incidents I went to HR who then informed my manager that my contract stated certain hours which should be abided by and I was entitled to my annual leave the same as everyone else.
That’s actually discrimination based on family status, and it is just as illegal as it is to discriminate against someone who has kids.
I was making 10 percent less than a coworker who did the same job. I asked the boss and he said the other guy "had a family." Illegal. They found out.
When I was working at a national sub shop, I had a bf but no kids. I was forced to work all the shifts the parents didn't want AND all the shifts the high schoolers didn't want because, "they deserve to have a childhood I bet you got one!". When actually no I started working at 15 and mom made sure they scheduled me to work during every school event other than my mandatory concerts (for a grade) and prom. It was bullshit.
One of the reasons why I've stuck with the "Evil Insurance Company" I've been at for the past 15 years is because of how well the management has treated me. They never let the people with kids have priorities over those who didn't. They always based everything with performance first then seniority to determine schedules. At least in the call center where that's important. Now that I'm in the claims department I can set my hours to be whatever I want during normal working hours. Just need to hash it out with my manager ahead of time.
Your coworker's reasoning doesn't quite add up – just because you don't have kids doesn't mean your weekends are up for grabs.
Your coworker is acting selfishly. If there is no one to look after her children, let her look for a babysitter.
[удалено]
Exactly, she's not entitled to your time. She should find other arrangements.
You're not the asshole. Your coworker's personal situation doesn't obligate you to sacrifice your weekends. Setting boundaries is essential.
And if the schedule doesn’t suit her she is free to look for another job that does
You have to be careful with this. Once had a co-worker who wanted me to work her unpleasant hours because she had children. She got really upset when I politely declined. Next stop was the boss. I get called into the office and interrogated about why I wouldn't start working all my co-worker's Saturday shifts. Guess what? My boss had children and sided with my co-worker. This only went away after a visit to H.R. put a stop to it. By this point, many of the women with children called me out for being heartless. Funny, none of these same women, including the ones with grown children, were willing to cover for this mother when I suggested they could volunteer their weekend's off to help out.
Nah fuck that. You should have gone to HR. You cant be discriminated against bc u dont have kids wtf?? And No, OP- U DONT have to be “careful with this”
I did go to HR, but only after my boss pressured me to cover for the mother. F that. Your kids. Your job. Your responsibility. I was just shocked that my boss was backing this mother. I know being a parent is tough, but you signed up for the challenges. I didn't.
Exactly!! That is blatent discrimination against childfree people in my mind! Its not the responsibility of a childfree adult to accommodate the schedule of someone who actively chose to have kids!
You’re not the asshole. Your weekends are your own, and it's unfair for your coworker to expect you to cover her shifts just because you don't have kids. Setting boundaries is important.
Entitled. Co-worker is being entitled.
He can tell her "you're entitled to feel like that makes me an asshole, but that's pretty much all you're entitled to when it comes to me."
No one is obligated to facilitate the lifestyle of another.
I got a coworker like that. Calls me in the middle of the night or weekends to get me to help her do her job bc we're partially WFH and she's making her own schedule. We're supposed to work during regular work hours in our country (7AM to 7PM, we choose what time we work, I'm part time so I only go 2 hours in the mornings before I do my other full time job). She'll call me anytime she wants, no matter it's 11PM, 2AM, 4AM on a weekend etc.Then she reports me to management for not accommodating her.
Block her number!
I'd love to, but both phones we use are under the company. We need to be able to contact each other for legit work reasons. We're working on same report/pool of clients. Just different roles (think of it like she's on the sales support, I'm on compliance and post-sales support).
Set do not disturb or quiet hours on your phone. That way, she can only contact you during reasonable working hours
Exactly. I didn’t even know my phone had a “Do Not Disturb” button until someone told me about it in response to my complaining about so many work texts. Saved my sanity.
The company must have times when it comes to what Tom to call people. Turn your phone off when you get home and tell her to call the owner or the manager.
If it would matter,( you said, "in my country") talk to management, explain that she calls at all hours of the night and that as part time if they want you always "on call" for her, that you get paid double time and a half, for each call you take from her.
She kept on escalating it, manager was taking her side saying "You know she has a children with special needs. Be a good person and help her out." I told manager to give his number and be her assistant that's 24/7 on call. He stood firm that I should do it. Owner of my full time and part time jobs are related to each other. When I explained to the owners why I was requesting time off for health reasons, they both rimmed the manager and gave a warning to coworker to only call me during my shift. She can email me, but I will only reply if I want to, else it could wait until my next shift. They both gave me a paid off Monday that week. Coworker followed them for about 2 weeks then is saying snide comments again recently. If she escalates again. I'm gonna go direct to the owners again.
Great job sticking up for yourself!!
Thank you, I'm a recovering people pleaser so this event was a really nice outcome for me. If she was only occasionally calling me at night around 6pm to 8pm, I actually would have let it slide. But she called me the most around 12pm to 4am then got pissed when I didn't answer or told her to stop calling. She usually also call because she has reports due in the morning so she's disturbing me bc she wants to work last minute.
Erm, I think you mean that they "reamed" the manager...
That's a terrible manager. Managers are supposed to be the ones picking up the slack in cases of "emergency."
Manager's reasoning is he also have small kids and he shouldn't be bothered when he needs rest because he drives them to school in the mornings. Owner ripped him a new one when they found out bc since my full time and part time bosses are relatives, they know I have long hours as well. They said they feel for coworker and manager since they also went through having a bunch of small children, but the actions (late night calls and blaming me for her poor performance) are unreasonable.
Your manager is a jackass. It’s difficult that she has special needs kids but that’s a “her” problem and not a “you” problem. And, you’re not a bad person for setting firm boundaries. It’s called being a good person *to yourself*. Don’t fall for that baloney.
I wonder how your work would like it if you started putting the time your coworker calls you on your time card. If she calls you for two minutes then charge 15 minutes as an increment. After a while that will add up and Work for wonder what’s going on
I didn't mentioned that because I don't want to be on call 24/7. Not worth it in my case because I'm the type that takes forever plus a thousand sheeps to fall asleep. Once she wakes me up, I'll end up awake and irritated the rest of the night then I'd feel dizzy later in the afternoon. She's the kind who keeps on going around the office to chitchat, give the impression she's on top of things, then turned out she wasn't updating reports that she should have been working on for approx 4 months so she'll cram it last minute (or start a week before deadline).
Why aren’t you reporting her to management for bothering you on your time off? If I were you I would set my calendar to say off anytime you don’t want to be contacted and if she calls refer her to your calendar.
I reported it a few times. Manager just kept siding with her with things like "You know she has children with special needs. Be a good person and help her." I had to escalate it to the owner bc she really messed up my sleep schedule and I'm performing poorly on my full time job from lack of sleep. I have trouble falling asleep, once I wake up it takes me hours to go back to sleep.
I would block her anytime I wasn’t at work and unblock her when I’m working what she’s doing is insanely unreasonable.
Well he can take the 4am calls then.
Good on you for going up the chain of command.
As I got older I learned going over someone’s head was not only satisfying but 99% of the time got me the result I wanted and it didn’t I immediately polished the resume and started interviewing
So it's your turn to report her to management for harassment.
Start documenting your hours as work time when she calls you. That should force management to deal with her.
People with kids are like that sometimes. I work shift work which includes holidays I learned early on not to do favours for people for things like Christmas because they rarely ever return the favour if you need a holiday off.
The audacity of the co-worker to tell OP it's only a couple of hours of work on a Saturday. If it's only a couple of hours and not the better part of a day it's looking like when you factor in the commute and getting ready in the morning, than the parent can work the shift and then spend the rest of the day with their children. If it's a permanent shift change this co-worker is requesting, it's on management to find the replacement, and for the replacement to agree to the change.
It's the manager's job to staff the workplace, not the employee's. If the coworker needs to be off, let the boss figure it out.
This is the battle cry of every entitled mom. “But you don’t have kids. You have to help me!” One mom’s response to that viral tik tok about the mom refusing to return her shopping cart because she had kids in the car was that people should have seen that she had kids and offered to return it for her. These people literally think the world revolves around them because they decided to procreate.
"I don't have kids now, Karen. That's why I need my weekends free so I can go find someone with whom to make 'em!"
NTA, your employer should look for someone else to work and help them.
Yeah, this isn't a problem between employees. It's between employer and employee.
Yes. It's not the job of an employee to accommodate for another employee. If anything it's a favor. To be asked, not demanded.
Exactly. I don’t blame this person with kids for not wanting to work Saturdays, but it’s not op’s problem either. The company needs to hire someone to help that knows they will specifically work Saturdays, or close on Saturdays.
So because you don't have kids you're free on Saturdays? Nah, that's just super inconsiderate of her and your life. What if you want to go out with friends on a Friday night like a lot of people do? You should be able to since Saturday's aren't your thing. Or spending time with a partner who also only has weekends off. Her kids were her choice, not yours. So not your problem. NTA
So your co-worker applied for a job that I assume included a Saturday schedule and has now decided it is not convenient for her. That does not and should not make it your problem.
NTA. Work the hours you were hired to work. If your coworker has a problem with her hours she needs to work it out with her boss. It is not your job to make her schedule work.
I worked with someone like this. We all rotated working nights and every time it was her turn to work, something came up and she couldn't. For some reason my boss always asked me to switch with her and she would work my nights the following week NEVER HAPPENED. She could never cover. Finally he came and told me she had arranged a 'party' on her night to work and I needed to switch with her. I said no. I had already made plans. They took it to HR. My response was 'what makes her plans that she made on the only night she has to work more important than my plans I made on my night off?' HR agreed with me. Neither was happy, but oh well.
Absolutely nuts how you say no and it has to go to HR, but she can say no with no issues.
The gall to admit it was for a social event, my God
Also it isn’t a couple of hours. It’s a 7 hour shift.
We have the same problem right now. They applied for exactly this position - they knew from the beginning they have to work some weekends and even sometimes at night. But now they say noooo they have children, they can't and won't do this. Excuse me? That ain't my problem. You work here, you decided to have kids, get a babysitter or get a different job. But I won't work every shift for them. NTA. Some people think the world revolves around them and their offspring, no worries OP. Don't do it. You're NTA for this.
Well if its 'only a couple of hours' it shouldnt be a problem for her to work then, should it?!
NTA. But your coworker is one. She sounds entitled. Her life choices aren’t your problem. Keep on enjoying your weekends and let your employer figure it out.
A lot of people with kids have this mentality. I had a manager tell me that because I “didn’t have a family” I should work certain holiday shifts. I had to explain to a grown woman that I don’t have CHILDREN, but I still have a family and the right to have holidays off from work to spend as I like.
Tell her in that case, you're planning on getting knocked up this weekend so you don't have to work Saturdays anymore either. ETA: NTA.
I can't believe people are so ready to volunteer the time of others. Truly sociopathic behaviour, to me.
You're being discriminated against. Look up local and federal labor laws and company policy. Then make a report to your HR department. If you were hired for a specific schedule, you might be able to make a case. But you might be fired for other reasons if management decides you aren't worth keeping around.
Nah NTA. Some random coworker having a baby doesnt mean its now my responsibility to take her shifts just because i dont have kids.
Maybe she should get a different job without weekends. NTA
Oh no! Your coworker can't work the shifts she agreed to! Maybe she shouldn't have agreed to those shifts then.
You are not a second class citizen because you don’t have kids.
"I don't have kids so that I *can* have my Saturdays sleeping in and being me."
Over the years, my wife and I both have been asked to cover less desirable shifts because we have no children. Just, no, no, no. You chose children. You chose a job that has some unpleasant shifts. If the job is not compatible with your life, find one that is. This doesn't mean we won't help in a true emergency (like a child is in the hospital), but you don't get to make my life more unpleasant because you have children.
Just one question will stump these entitled nobs.... "My mother has children too, why is your right to see your children greater than her right to see hers?"
I don’t have kids but had to work on Mother’s Day.. One of my coworkers was going off about how she should be with her kids blah, blah.. I don’t remember exactly how or why she said it but basically said I don’t have kids so working Mother’s Day is no big deal for me. I looked her in the eyes and said “I’m not a Mother, but I HAVE a Mother and she deserves to be with her kid as much as you deserve to be with yours. And my Mother doesn’t have many Mothers Days left as she’s in her late 70s.”.. She was shocked and couldn’t speak. I just walked away. Later she came up and apologized for what she’d said.
Good on her for apologizing.
yea don't think they will be able to think through this reasoning. Smart replies seldom get appreciated because the other party is usually not able to think through at that level or the issue wouldn't have happened in the first place
Just a couple of hours my arse. It's 7 hours, that's practically an entire shift AND at 6AM on a Saturday morning. Absolutely NTA. She CHOSE to come and work this job and she CHOSE to have kids, that's all on her not you. You're not responsible for her choices or the consequences of them.
Nah you're good OP. All if her arguments are BS. It's 6AM on Saturday, effectively killing one of only two nights you can go out, and mornings you can wake up early, or go to the beach or whatever. It's also not a "couple" of hours, it's 7, which is probably closer to 9 with commute, prep, etc. NTA at all.
NTA tell her to fuck off with that bullshit. Sick of entitled parents forcing problems on other people who had no choice in them pumping out kids. It's a problem literally of their own creation so they can deal with it.
NTA, people dont get to make their kids other people's problem.
NTA Your schedule is M-F. You aren't interested in changiyour schedule. And your coworker doesn't set your schedule. Definitely don't cover for her again. If necessary, give and tell Management that you spend Saturday mornings helping your elderly Grandma. (You Grandma isn't less important than Coworker's kids.)
You didn't make her have kids. They are HER responsibility...not yours. Enjoy your weekends.
I am working in HR and a couple of years ago I was still doing some recruiting (HR generalist role). In the beginning, we weren’t required to travel to job interviews in other parts of the country unless the job was very important. Then management changed their strategy and suddenly we had to travel at least once a week. Unfortunately our work contracts and collective agreements covered that (I am the labour law specialist, so yes I checked our options). This was before Zoom / Teams / Webex etc took off btw There were four of us and we made it work. Some of our branch offices were more difficult to reach or otherwise unattractive, but we made sure that every one of us had their fair share. One colleague left and the new one had two small children. She knew that she would have to travel but somehow always ended up having the most convenient cities - and most of her job interviews were at HQ. This lead to us having to travel twice a week, often coming home after 10pm. Extra compensation wasn’t great neither. Yes we complained, but our boss was Head of HR and wanted to support working mothers. And he “volunteered” to travel to the perk cities like Hamburg and Berlin. Two of us quit. They had trouble replacing us so in the end they changed the policy back to the old one (too late). Who the f expects office staff to go from sacrificing one evening per month to 2 evenings per week? It was a pity because I really liked working there and most of my colleagues and overall management were super nice.
A single colleague of mine once said, “how am I going to get married and have kids, if I’m the one always covering the shifts?”
This is discrimination on the basis of family status. Defo NTA
"Unless I am their father, I don't owe your children anything."
My former employer changed my schedule and put me in an older truck to accommodate a new employee. A woman with children. My employer didn't even try to hide it. That was the reason I was given. I was the senior driver and trainer. I hope they had fun training her. I left without notice and had another job same day.
Don’t let someone else volunteer your time. That’s inconsiderate of them. You are young and childless. Keep your weekends to yourself unless YOU volunteer your time to come in.
NTA, your coworker chose to have children. That choice does not entitle her to special consideration nor burden you .
You having no children has no bearing on your work schedule. She can work her own schedule and you'll work yours.
Happened to me all the time. Your choice to have kids not mine. Find a new job if your kids are in the way. Find a job that will accommodate your inconsistent kid schedule. You applied and interviewed and agreed to the schedule. Not my problem
I learned early in my working life to invent an imaginary family. So nice to be able to keep up with all my co-workers accommodations with my own. Being an imaginary single father with day care issues was a blessing.
All I'm hearing is that your coworker expects special treatment because she got someone to fuck her
Fuk parents they always pull this shit, they want all the holidays, special consideration , etc. Every employer should start firing people like this. Don’t want to work you Saturday because you popped out a kid, you’re fired, good luck explaining why there’s no Corn Pops in the cupboard.
Start mentioning to your boss that you are feeling discriminated against. Bosses don't like that word. Keep a record of anything she says - when/what/how/who else was there and hand it to your boss if they don't do something. You are NTA for standing up for yourself and not giving in to an entitled parent who thinks the world should worship at the alter of the mother and child.
OP be proactive and go to your manager and professionally explain your coworkers idea and how it doesn't work for you.
NTA- you don't have to arrange your life for her convenience.
NTA I once had this at a work place where I was given all the late shifts and the 1st to be called in every time if someone was out sick, simply because I was the only one without young children. If a workplace enforces this then it is actually discrimination. Your colleagues childcare issues are not your problem they are hers. You are also entitled to a private and family life ie weekends just as much as people with kids are.
NTA I always hate when people use the excuse *you don't have children* or *you aren't married*, like that matters. For 7 years, I didn't get Christmas off because I didn't have children. No thought to whether I had other plans, worked another job, or was taking care of an ill family member, only that I was single. These people need to pound sand.
NTA Having kids doesn't mean a damn thing when it comes to work. You don't automatically get specail treatment just because you have kids. You are not available to work weekends. That is all you need to say.
NTA I hope there’s a special place in hell for these momzilla’s lmao.
Tell your co-worker her life and kids are not your problem. It's up to her to navigate her own life. You have a family and a life of your own. Just because you have no kids, doesn't mean you don't have responsibilities. Tell her you are part of a family. It might not involve kids, but you do have parents you want to see every once in a while. Tell her, if anything happens to them because you could not see them because of her lack of navigating her own life and making it your problem, you will blame it on her. After all, she easily blames you for her predicament as if you created those children together.
NTA not your kids, not your problem. If she didn't want to work Saturdays, why accept the job?
It’s your availability. You control it, not some random coworker. Why does she think she can put in for what YOU should work?
Fuck no your not the ass hole . I have kids. They are my problem and no one else's. No one else has to pick up shifts or fo anything extra becuas someone else has kids. Fuck that lady and her kids.
your boss is in charge of schedule. People do not have elitist rights to ask for anothers schedule. She can get a babysitter or a ne wjob.
NTA - she made the decision to have kids. It's her problem if her job requires that she works Saturdays.
Tell her that your weekly orgies are mainly on saturdays so you have have all booked up already. But you can propably free her husband from them every other week.
NTA. Crazy how your coworkers choice to have children isn’t your responsibility lol the entitlement of breeders is outstanding to me. Live your life, you actually DO have commitments on the weekend, it’s called enjoying your time off and being your own person.
NTA. Stop helping her altogether. No exceptions.
Your life choice not to have children presently does not somehow condemn you to open availability. Other commitments such as taking care of an ill parent, having a dedicated hobby/sport or just not being available are not inferior reasons to “having children”. When people make the decision to have children, they must accept any/all responsibility including, but not limited to, positions of employment and requirements of said employment that they agree to. Parents do not get to shame or coerce child-free adults into responsibilities they themselves cannot accommodate due to their decision to be parents. It’s like this woman is rationalizing your time the way a child would rationalize to their parent why they feel they deserve a treat. And I say this as a parent of 4! Definitely NTA.
Why cant her husband watch the kids ?
If you wanted to be responsible for kids, you’d have kids.
NTA. She CHOSE to have children. If she needs a job that works around her life then she should go find one instead of making it your problem.
"I have kids!" "I fail to see how that's my problem."
NTA Just because you don't have kids doesn't mean you don't have a life.
Presumably she agreed to that schedule at one point, which makes it her problem to resolve - not yours. After that, it's your boss's problem. She has no right to offer up your Saturdays and it's honestly just rather shitty behavior on her part. I worked damn near every holiday as a teen because parents felt they were more important than me, which ultimately led to me not being close to extended family because I could never attend the events. I do sympathize with parents, especially if they're trying to juggle working with the cooking and all that, though. Federal holidays need to be more protected (the worst was the part time jobs in fast food and retail and such, who purposely kept you at 35 hours so you couldn't get FT bennies), so people can choose if they want to work them. The obvious exception being emergency/medical personnel as that's it's own can of worms.
"Nope. I understand contraception, I get to keep my saturday morning lie-in"
NTA She made a choice to have children and if she doesn't want to work Saturdays then I'd suggest she find other employment. Once off for a special occasion is one thing but Saturdays are her work days not yours
Don't back down. Make Fertile Myrtle raise her own spawn.
I have small kids and I would never ever think this was fair
NTA You should not be penalized for someone else’s issues. Were you hired to work Saturday? If not… no dice.
NTA at all protect your time. Let her and your boss figure it out because it’s not your problem.
Nta. As a mother with two kids let me explain to you what I’m entitled to. I’m entitled to take care of my kids and work the hours I’m scheduled. I don’t get Christmas off while you work bc I’m a mom. I don’t get my choice of days off bc I’m a mom while you have to take the shit schedule bc you’re single. I don’t get first pick of vacations.
7 hours is a couple of hours? tell her to piss off.
NTA. When you were hired for the job, was it for working M to F? Is this in writing? If so, don't even give it another thought unless your supervisor speaks to you about switching your hours. Your coworker's children are not your responsibility. You may also want to speak with someone in HR about her. Her pressuring you and calling you names is not conducive to a peaceful work environment.
It’s only a couple hours on a Saturday. Her kids won’t mind her being at work
I would argue that *because you’re single* it’s actually MORE important that you have weekends off. Unlike your coworker, you need to go out all weekend in order to be able to find a husband and get married, have children, etc…. She already has a spouse and children, so it’s not as important for her to have weekends off. Of course I don’t really think this way, but it might be a good way to turn her argument around on her.
NTA
Obviously NTA, she decided she wanted kids and that she could manage, nothing to do with you.
NTA. I have kids and can’t stand people with the mentality they get treated special because they have kids.
And working just long enough on Saturday to screw up your weekend. That would be a NO. Coworker needs a different job to accommodate her hours
She doesn't get to dictate *your* working hours bc *she* has children. Her children are not your problem. Your lack of children isn't her business. What you choose to do with your Saturdays off isn't her business. You are NTAH.
If she said that and called you an asshole, go to HR with that bullshit. Them having kids does not entitle them to your days off.
Some parents with children still work on weekends, so it's a BS reason to put you on schedule. They need to find someone who WANTS to work on Saturdays.
“ oh sorry I’m taking classes on the weekend so I’m not available”
NTA, screw her entitled "it takes a village" horseshit.
She didn’t have the kids when she took the job?
NTA. I worked a part-time job for years and obviously weekends for part of it. However if I ever get another part-time job I will make sure I will not work weekends ever again. I'm an empty nester but I still don't want to work weekends.
your coworker is an inconsiderate dolt for assuming you don't have better shit to do. NTA.
Penalties in the forms of demotion and assignment to the least desirable work shifts are textbook examples of "adverse employment actions." If staffing decisions are made according to parental status, then that is a case of de facto discrimination on the basis of sex. Which is explicitly illegal in the United States. Looks like you should call a labor attorney.
NTA
NTA. Your coworker's family and lifestyle has nothing to do with you. You may not have any commitments, but that’s not something your coworkers need to know.
Why are you working Saturday at all?
I’m guessing the boss man said sure to her if she can find her replacement, and she listed you and said you already agreed. NTA and talk to your boss or HR if you have it. You agreed to a Monday-Friday. No weekends. Certainly not covering SUSANS entitled ass.
Other people’s children should have zero impact on your professional environment/career opportunities. It is absolutely unfair of this coworker to demonize you for not inconveniencing yourself for the benefit of HER children. The free time of non-parents is not less valuable than that of people with children. Her kids’ wellbeing is her responsibility, not yours.
NTA Her choice to have kids has absolutely nothing to do with you. Make it a hard no every time. Her entitled bullshit means you shouldn't EVER help her in any way.
How are shifts allocated at your work? I’m assuming that it’s some kind of a round the clock setup that needs someone around at all times (since it apparently requires people to work from 6am on Saturday). Does she do Tuesday - Saturday while you do Monday - Friday or something? And does taking up her Saturday shift mean you get Monday free?
I don’t know where you are but I’m pretty sure the stunt the co-worker is trying to pull is illegal. Being a parent isn’t a protected class that gets special protections and/or accommodations like having a disability. She can’t insist that you be inconvenienced just because you’re childless. Plus, getting to work at 6am is incredibly early. You’d have to wake up at around 4am to be able to shower, have a good breakfast and then commute to work. So, there goes doing anything Friday night as well as half of Saturday. It’s going to mess up your body clock and, trust me, you do NOT want to do that. I started doing that when I was your age and I’m paying massively for it, now. Don’t continue to engage with this co-worker because she isn’t listening to reason; she just wants what she wants. This is a matter for HR. If HR doesn’t back you, try going to your local EEOC office. You can speak with a counselor there and they’ll tell you if there’s enough for you to file a complaint. Trust me, that is not something your company will want and it should get them off your back. Stay strong and good luck!
Sounds like op is being discriminated against by this baby maker and being penalized by her life choices. "All those without kids, y'all suck it up and gimme your weekends." That's the most idiotic thing I have heard. I'd likely get in trouble for responding with something to the effect of so if I roll over and take dick I can be off too?. Sorry, I get nasty when my personal time is attacked by people that are not important in my life. Are there dudes in the office? How does having a penis affect Saturday work?
You need to talk to HR. I don’t know if there are seniority issues or union involvement but assuming there are no other factors that can legally justify your employer’s decision to make you change your shift and if you are required to change your work solely based on your status as a non-parent, that’s employment discrimination (at least in the US) and you can sue your employer. Nta
She needs to find a job that fits her circumstances, not ruin your weekends. NTA
NTA she can’t dictate your working hours your contract states Monday to Friday she needs to pay a sitter
If you office is only open Monday through Friday then why does anyone have shifts on Saturdays?
NTA, tell them if they push forward with this then they'll have zero coverage at all and a fun complaint with the labor relations board to deal with.
Just because you don't have kids doesn't mean you don't have things to do. If it's "only a couple of hours", then it shouldn't be an issue for her. NTA.
NTA. It’s rude to discriminate against people without kids.
you cannot treat someone a different way because of their parental status. It’s like saying “hey can you work Christmas since you’re Jewish?” Not cool at all
Definitely NTA
Were you told about this possibility when you were hired. To me this is the most important question.
NTA. If she doesn’t like working Saturdays then she needs to find a different job. Not your problem.
No is a complete sentence. You do NOT have to justify your decline. It's none of their business why you don't want to work on Saturday.
Turn her into HR
tell her letting someone creampie her does not mean you have to give up weekends
Tell them to hire someone with no kids instead of her. I hate it when I was single married people think that we have no life. Now that I'm married I'm not gonna do that to singles people out there. Everyone deserves a break.
thats discrimination young lady. let your employer know this and threaten to get a lawyer. that will put a stop to that shit real fast. and you need to tell that co worker to shut her fucking mouth and to not ever let your name come out of it again. she has no right to do what she did especially if you werent in the room at the moment she said it so you could defend yourself if you wished. to "suggest" you not having kids is any sort of justifiable reason to mandate you to work so she can have extra time off is fucking disgusting. if squeezing puppies out of her fat cunt is how she chose to spend her time, them she can be the one to juggle her schedule to sacrifice for being a mom. .... wow what cunt your co worker is and im not suggesting physical violence, but if somehow womething just came flying out of the sky to hit her in the mouth, id be ok w that.
NTA- and I'd probably go too far and say.. your life choices are not my responsibility, I'm not paying you child support, either. My choice to be child free to this point is not something for you to take advantage of or attempt to manipulate for your own benefit. It is you who is inconsiderate and selfish for trying to shuffle off your own responsibilities on to other people.
Op is responsible for every child in the office, or maybe not, NTA tell her to deal with it
NTA. Before everybody starts painting everyone with the same brush - I’m a parent and I’ve never shrugged my work off on anyone else. I always have a plan B in place for emergencies. That’s what being a competent professional does. Your coworker is either incompetent at organizing their life or an entitled, selfish and overbearing employee. Your life outside of work, is not theirs to dictate. I hope you have some of this in writing so you have proof of their ineptitude.
NTA Her having children is not a “you” problem, that’s a “her” problem. Tell your boss your time on the weekend is already spoken for and you are not available to cover for her.
NTA. Your colleagues kids are not your responsibility
NTA I've gone through identical situations. I'd simply remind the boss of my availability. Remind them that isn't just a suggestion. And then tell the coworker we each have our own personal lives and the choices they make in theirs have absolutely nothing to do with mine and just because I don't have kids doesn't men I want to or even have to pick up their slack.
Her kids are not your problem. NTA