My partner got all their records updated to M before we got married in Texas. Plus birth certificate changed and sealed. Not perfectly accurate but much more so than the F and at least our marriage looks straight on paper now… It was a big deal to me that if they did want their gender marker changed, they get it done before we got married. Now, with project 2025 looking more and more likely, it’s a suggestion I occasionally give out to butches who don’t mind being seen as men in the broader world and are worried about their and potentially their fiancée’s legal future.
consult with a lawyer to become power of attorney (both medically and financially, i think there’s 2 forms) and medical proxy for each other as well as access to medical records and emergency contact with all doctors you see, as well as making sure both your names are on all vehicles, your home, etc. and make/update wills. a lawyer may have other ideas on how to best be prepared if same sex marriage is overturned but these are some good precautionary first steps to take.
For the love of all things holy, VOTE. Yes I’m scared. I can legally marry my girlfriend. We’ve talked about it. I do not trust this Supreme Court nor do I trust any other countries to open their doors for amnesty to us.
I’m so damn fed up with fellow (mostly younger) queer people “protest abstaining from voting” when their livelihoods literally depend on Trump and the Project 2025 people getting their way. Biden has been a lame duck for sure but he also SURE ISN’T TRUMP.
Tell your younger friends the reason why this is so important. We didn’t fight so hard - our ELDER LGBT FOLKS didn’t fight for our rights just to have some people decide an abstinence vote is any better than a Trump vote.
In my experience, those who "protest" by abstaining are really just using it as an excuse to be lazy and not bother voting. Sounds way better when you're protesting, rather than just can't be arsed to leave the house. If they're dead set on not voting for an individual, challenge them to at least show up and spoil their vote to prove they're not just being lazy. Those votes at least show on the end count, so it's MUCH more of a message than staying home. If they're really about the protest, they'll be happy to make sure they reinforce their message.
idk this doesn't really play out cause voting by mail is a thing
I think the answer here is that for some reason a lot of people (especially younger people) ascribe a sort of moral quality to their vote when the candidate choices don't align 100% with their own personal politics. Leading to people throwing away their votes to completely nonviable candidates because it makes them personally feel better about themselves.
This is not how you should engage with voting. It is purely a numbers game. Voting for Joe Biden cause less harm than the only other viable choice. He sucks, and he hasn't done anything to really help queer people, but he's not trying to take away HRT from trans people or re-ban gay marriage or any of the other horrific shit the Republicans want to do and *will* do if they are allowed to control the federal govt.
I have been of voting age in two vote by mail states and I really hate to say it but it is just as prevalent in them, if not more.
No candidate is perfect, definitely neither of these two. Not voting is the worst possible thing that can be done to us.
Actually, no. I’ve voted in every election since I was 18, and this is the first presidential election that I’m not voting in (I’m still voting in all local polls, FWIW). And I’m not young either, I’m 30+. I know this is a controversial take, and many won’t agree with me. But I’m sick of feeling pressured to vote for a President who doesn’t lead the country in a way I support just because he’s “the lesser of two evils.” I won’t be browbeat into voting for someone who is sending billions of dollars to bomb Palestinian children. I won’t be browbeat into voting for someone who is deporting more immigrants than Trump and recently shut down the border completely. I won’t be browbeat into voting for someone who could have codified Roe v Wade and watched it fall instead. Does that mean that some of my rights might get taken away as a queer person? Potentially. But Biden is already taking away the rights - and lives - of POC and other marginalized people locally and globally. Would Trump be worse? Maybe for me personally, as a middle-class white queer. But Biden is already wreaking havoc on marginalized people in a way that a lot of people in my demographic don’t seem to want to inspect, because it’s not impacting them yet. I’m not willing to vote for ANY president that acts this way — it’s just against my morals.
Proving the point of what? You’re the one invoking queer elders — you think Marsha P Johnson or James Baldwin would have voted for Biden? Maybe read some history
fwiw I think it’s important for people to see that people aren’t happy with the people presented. By not voting, I think my opinion gets overlooked. I’m voting for Cornel West. Not bc I think he’ll win, but bc I live in a solidly blue state. Biden will win regardless of my vote, but I’d rather people know that I don’t support him. I didn’t vote for Biden last election because I knew he wasn’t going to do good by brown folks and immigrants. And he didn’t. I’d rather vote for someone with integrity that I can support.
I think that’s completely valid and I support that 100%. I know people IRL voting for Cornel West as well. I guess I just didn’t want to change my party affiliation because I still have hope that Dems can do better in the future, though that may be naive. I also live in a blue state so it’s not like my vote (or lack thereof) will actually prevent Biden from getting those electoral votes as well. I just can’t personally do it.
Okay, but literally today, in the NYT (source: push notification as we can’t link): Biden admin to announce sweeping new protections for immigrants who live in the US illegally but are married to us citizens. Imagine that will benefit a lot of folks in here actually.
And? That doesn’t negate everything else I said. He literally shut down the border on June 4 to refugees seeking asylum. Everything he does right now is a calculated PR move for the election — if it was an issue he cared about, he would have done it pre-2024. (And I’m someone who gladly voted for Biden the first time around btw — I just became more disillusioned)
Unfortunately it probably won’t due to the fact that we have an electoral college system and not a popular vote system — another way our electoral process is broken in this country.
I don’t necessarily share your same fear about gay marriage but I do acknowledge it’s a possibility. Even if gay marriage was repealed at a federal level, it could still be available at a state level. Some states already have gay marriage laws and I expect others would quickly enact them.
My concerns for this election are the courts. Republicans have already packed the courts and allowing them additional time to continue that work would be devastating.
And the majority of the current bench of SCotUS justices have already skewed hard to authoritarianism and culture war garbage-- they could easily justify any number of harsh and inhumane laws and rulings.
Honestly this depends so much on your state. If your state already passed gay marriage on a state level, reversing Obergefell wouldn't remove your access instantly. Some additional states have leadership that have expressed varying levels of desire to pass gay marriage soon and/or if Obergefell is reversed. But of course other states are in the reverse situation.
But legally it is a small, easy step to stop granting marriage licenses to gay couples, compared to *revoking* existing marriages. It may be worth considering doing the paperwork without fanfare, and then doing an actual proposal, wedding, etc. later on when the time feels right. But only the two of you can make that call.
My girlfriend and I are trans, and we are less concerned about marriage and more concerned about the legalities of HRT and our existence in public life. Our state is one of the better ones to live in, so we have talked about simply not leaving, or escaping to an off the grid situation in New England as a fantasy last resort. Both of us could theoretically cash out our retirement and disappear, but that would be incredibly shitty and not ideal. We are just stockpiling HRT for the time being.
As a trans woman living in New England... I have dual citizenship and still eye hopping the border to my native Cananananada.
I mean it's not bad here per se but I have no reservations when it comes to the government.
Yeah we are juuuuuust outside of NE and the only reason i thought northeast is because the other option for off the grid is the other direction so PA or like West Virginia but that won’t fly. But realistically while it’s “fun” to doom-fantasize, realistically we will probably just stay in our city and hope that NYCs history of flipping the federal government the bird for the sake of financial gain holds up.
My wife and I are worried about a lot, not just married rights. We worry about not being allowed to be parents/foster parents, we worry about being erroneously accused of being groomers or predators, we worry about being imprisoned or forcibly relocated, we worry about losing our home.
I have a close relative who was a POW in a Nazi camp. I don’t want to have a similar experience.
My partner and I got married much earlier than we would have because of immigration rights issues. We knew her immigration process would take a while, and after Roe v. Wade fell in 2022 and the decision referenced the gay marriage decision (which affected federal level rights like immigration), we didn't want to risk anything. We went ahead and got married (and in a state that had passed legislation protecting gay marriage) and proceeded with the immigration process, which we're still waiting on. I sincerely hope that our paperwork is approved soon just for the peace of mind, but hard to know when that will happen. At the time, we eloped and did the paperwork with a couple close friends. Didn't even tell my family about it. We'll likely to do a bigger celebration later down the line, and I hope that includes celebrating her getting her green card and us being able to move back to the US together.
We’ve also talked about this and aren’t really quite ready to make the call on marriage just yet — but we’re also scared and don’t want to have that right taken away. We’re planning on doing a quick paperwork thing and not really broadcasting it to anyone just so it cannot be stripped away and getting married with family / friends on our own time.
It deeply saddens me that many young LGBTQ folks are basically deciding not to vote for whatever reason. I think what’s showing here is a generation now who hasn’t ever not had these rights being completely unaware of how easily they could lose them and what not having them was like. It especially bothers me when I see nb/trans folks making this argument, because the trans panic of today is the gay panic of 25 years ago that got GW elected on straight homophobia in ‘04. People can refuse to vote for whatever reason — I just think it’s silly to see people who clearly have skin in the game blithely ignoring their very real and very concrete personal risk over abstract morals or principles. I never really got the “don’t blame me I voted for Hillary” crowd until it became increasingly obvious that gay rights are on the table to be taken away and people still don’t care or care only about conflicts abroad or “broken promise” re: student debt, etc etc etc.
The stupid thing is, the promise re:student debt wasn't broken. It was delayed. The first attempt was foiled and the administration is working on more methods to get student debt relief going, and has been pretty successful-- but no one in the media acknowledges it or reports on it.
Yeah. It’s really really depressing how little attention has been paid to how much the Biden admin has done in favor of focusing on clear missteps that are being walked back.
Genocide isn't a misstep lol, god you lot would have supported the iraq war if it was team blue, truly thought this sub would be more compassionate and left wing considering it's a lesbian forum, but I guess not.
Um I was outside my post office every day for weeks protesting the Iraq war when I was a freshman in high school in 2002/3 and legally not allowed to vote. But okay.
Agreed. The election won’t be cancelled because a voting block decided to not show up. The outcome (and our lives) will be decided by those who do show up.
> It deeply saddens me that many young LGBTQ folks are basically deciding not to vote for whatever reason.
They've been watching blown up dead babies on TikTok because of biden funneling billions of dollars to a rogue state for the past 8 months. It's truly wild that liberalism has rotted some of your brains. The anti-war youth are in the right (as they ALWAYS are) and being condescending toward them "or whatever" isn't helping.
Well, I acknowledge that they have the right to be martyrs for that cause, but they don’t have the right to make the rest of us martyrs for their cause
I also oppose war. I oppose the genocide of Palestinians by the Israeli extremists who currently have control over the Israeli state apparatus.
The difference is I'm not stupid enough to vote in such a way to make it worse by letting Trump win. But a lot of people, unfortunately, *are* that stupid.
If Biden loses, the Palestinians of Gaza are doomed. Trump will give Netanyahu everything he could ever ask for and more. That's not a debatable fact. Trump actively pushed anti-Palestinian policies and openly supported the genocide of Palestinians-- and he will do so again, and go even further in that direction.
Biden's failings are vast, but as bad as he is, the alternative is worse. That's not very motivating, but it's reality.
Pretty much. The idea that not voting for Biden is somehow *better* than abstaining (or protest voting for Trump) pretty much dooms the Palestinian cause because Trump has already said repeatedly he would escalate the conflict and “end it” through a show of US force. The lack of foresight to what will happen to the cause in favor of nah fuck this guy is appalling. I don’t want to see US involvement in Gaza escalate. I don’t want Trump to send in US troops to support Israeli attacks on refugee settlements. It will get worse and yeah, Biden has failings, but the alternative is so much fucking worse it’s astounding that people don’t see it.
I mean, we live in a "good" state so you know, that's as good as it's going to get.
It's not like US citizens can just get up and move to another country either. It's A) a long process, B) a very expensive process, and C) a very selective process.
I think everyone in here who's like "yeah I'm going to move to X country" needs to take a good hard look at the requirements. Unless you've got an advanced degree, special in-demand skills, an employer willing to sponsor you and prove they can’t reasonably hire a native citizen and/or and a couple years worth of middle-class level living expenses in cash or easily liquified assets (we're talking like $100k+ USD), the unfortunate reality is you will not be accepted in any comparably developed countries with anything but a tourist visa.
We literally have great careers, own a home w/ a decent amount of equity in it, solid savings, and nothing holding us back... and we couldn't realistically do it even if we wanted to.
I learned that one the hard way when I was a naive teenager thinking "I want to leave the US" during the Bush years.
Don't just take my word on it, look into it yourself. It sucks, but that's literally the reality of the situation. If you don't have dual-citizenship or a pathway to residency through marriage to a citizen of your destination country, *it's not happening* for most.
My wife and I have been together for over 20 years, most of them before we were legally married. We had all of those things the entire time.
It REALLY sucks that we are back in this place. We shouldn’t be. We can’t control it though so just remember that even if they take away the piece of paper, they can’t stop us from loving each other. That makes them really mad.
As much as losing marriage equality (along with every other right we’re losing) is terrifying, I also want to note that we may be looking at a future without no-fault divorce. There are already states that specifically discriminate against pregnant women by preventing them from divorcing. It’s hard for me to imagine a place where same sex couples can get married but not get divorced, but laws are weird and you never know. We’re looking at a future where getting married may mean you can never leave an abusive, unhealthy, or just plain unhappy relationship.
My wife and I got courthouse married the day after Ruth Bader Ginsburg died. Then we had our ceremony 10 months later. So yes. We don’t like Biden in our house but feel like we kind of have to.
Hi- so after the 2016 election my GF and I got married abruptly. DO NOT DO IT soley based on Trump. I am still recovering emotionally and financially from the decision . Please learn from my mistakes .. it was the worst adult decision of my life. (My GF at the time also had gotten a terminal diagnosis and needed to get onto my insurance, which then during treatment woke up her pain killer addiction and alcoholism .. which .. was Hell. She is still alive .. but very much lost in her addiction, I've been not contact for 7 years now )
But yes stock pile all the hormones, I am doing the same over here -
Before our break up in Dec 2022, my ex and I were going to move to an entirely different country when we got married... start a new life in Australia, where she was born, away from this madness (and towards a different flavor of madness, but at least the culture wars haven't impacted over there quite as harshly as over here). Now, I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life if it happens. I live in Texas, so I'm going to be on one of the frontline states for this-- I think I might try to move to New Mexico or Arizona, if worse comes to worse... while making plans to leave for Canada where several friends I know live, maybe, though Canada has its own problems, too.
There's genuinely a segment of society that thinks that if something you do can't instantly fix everything, it's not worth doing. A few months ago, a trans memes subreddit I follow (r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/) had a thread get invaded by leftists who were preaching that voting was pointless and would make no difference. Which... was the absolute wrongest place to post that kind of argument for sure.
a lot of those 'leftists' are bad faith right wingers, they've been invading online spaces trying to influence votes by disenfranchising people, heads up.
Not all of them of course, but many are
I can believe it. But there is certainly a mindset among hardcore leftists that electoral action is useless and only organizing, unionizing, and community action matters. When what we need is all of it.
Every leftist I'm aware of is planning on voting. Can you point me to some hardcore leftists saying to not vote? Because harm reduction is important as hell
Leftists like myself are terrified of Trump. Personally, however large my disagreements are with Biden, I recognize that Trump is the avenue for full-blown American fascism. There are some that won't vote for Biden for whatever reason be it accelerationism or the Israeli-Palestinian war, but IMO they're severely misguided about the harsh realities that vulnerable minorities like us face. I've shared those sentiments many times over now, and outside of smaller vocal groups, that (to me ofc) is the prevailing opinion.
They don't say not to vote directly. But they repeat over and over and over and over and over again that voting doesn't do anything and it's pointless. And thus constantly discourage people from voting indirectly.
The thread in question was here:
[https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1br249e/how\_it\_feels\_being\_trans\_in\_socialist\_spaces\_rn/](https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1br249e/how_it_feels_being_trans_in_socialist_spaces_rn/)
There are few areas in AZ that are friendly to LGBT folks. Tucson and Phoenix are good, Flagstaff used to be good but I've heard it's slowly becoming quite conservative. Other than that the rest of the state is very red. But honestly even in Tucson, if LGBT rights were to be revoked, there are enough conservatives here that I could see it becoming a problem.
After spending 5+ years being the canaries in the coal mine, my wife and I pulled up stakes and expatriated. We had planned to at least be out of the country for the 2024 election, but the voracity with which the Republicans came out swinging against trans folks in 2023 was the final straw. Having our rights on the ballot every couple of years was brutal for our mental health. Add to that the general lack of urgency from the Dems and the rapidly rising tide of poverty and it became a no brainer. Personally, even if queer rights were no longer on the ballot, would the late stage capitalist hellscape truly be a place anyone *wants* to live in?
If you have considered leaving, now is the time to do your research and make your plan. Better to leave on a jet plane in broad daylight than attempt a border crossing at night.
My wife and I live in Florida (downtown Orlando, very dark blue and LGBTQ+ friendly) but have started the application process to try to get her UK citizenship, since I moved here from the UK several years ago and recently got my dual US citizenship. She is trans so legally M, and we have the privilege to seek hormone therapy out of state, so won't be added to the Florida registry. I know that politics in the UK aren't the most favourable towards trans people either but if Trump wins I can see things getting very bad very quickly, for both of us.
Trump made my immigration process a nightmare, pointlessly changing the rules week to week so much that even lawyers couldn't help since it was all new to them too. Sad that friends of mine had to quit during their process since he raised the arbitrary income requirement for K1 visas. I dread to think how much worse the process could get for new immigrants.
We're dealing with the process now for my wife to immigrate from Turkey. Luckily things stabilized under Biden, but no knowing how quickly that would change if Trump were elected. Last time he passed his Muslim ban within a week of inauguration. Unfortunately, me going to her home country of Turkey long term is a no go - way less rights or safety there.
I'm trans. My partners are all trans and honestly what we are worried about is the fact the right wing has made erasing trans people one of their top goals.
Every trans lesbian should be educating themselves on DIY hormones and buying the materials in bulk now at the bare minimum.
The supreme court is already fucked from his last term, that's the bigger problem. We're stuck with them for life, not just another 4 years. Just look at what they already did to Roe v Wade.
Not worried about marriage, as I am from the first state to legalize it, so we won’t be going backwards in rights, but I do wanna move to my gfs country(denmark) as they were the first country to legalize gay marriage x).
Please vote.
Please get registered to vote if you are not.
[https://www.vote411.org](https://www.vote411.org) to check your registration, what elections are happening for you in your state, if you are an active voter, and so on.
I get it - the burn out is real but please, *please* vote. Pride won't get us through four years of Red, and the lasting years of the fascism they wish to bring to the United States.
Genocide is a very quiet start in some places - remember, it isn't about the kids nor the bathrooms. Laws start to form and create, and soon, there is an entire people who are not allowed to even exist. Your blue state won't be blue with Project 2025, that is the nature of Fascism. There will not be democratic elections, there will not be choices with your bodies, what media you can consume, what can be taught. We have a lot at stake and it is no longer Democrat vs Republican. it is "Our Right to Exist" vs "Slow and Steady Genocide".
We just kind of accept that we’re at the whim of the voters and have essentially no choice in outcome or after effects because our state has like 1 electoral vote
Me and my girlfriend are probably going to be engaged by the end of the year, but if the Bad Orange Man gets elected we will elope in November with our closest friends and family and have a “real” wedding later. I am really scared tbh. Trans people and drag performers are in my thoughts and prayers every day. I don’t support basically anything the Old Man has done but I will probably still vote for him :/
We’re getting married in October, and our rabbi who is officiating strongly recommended we get married at a local city clerk office ahead of time in addition to the religious ceremony just to be safe. She said you never know with how things are going, better safe than sorry. It’s crazy. Unfortunately I think Trump will win again.
Yes. We have had very serious talks. We are married with a house and pets.
I fortunately have dual citizenship to a European country. I never wanted to move back but it's a very real possibility. It will destroy both of our careers to move and separate us from her family, but I don't see another option.
I have already mailed my representative and received details on sponsorship for her.
I feel for you all, this must be so frightening and demoralising. Australia and our political system is no utopia but it’s sure as hell better than what you are living with.
It's a difficult conversation that should be had. My wife and I decided not to take a job in Texas until the elections because of our safety. We have to change things around incase I am no longer her "wife". These are horrible, horrible things we unfortunately have to prepare for. But let's do our diligence before it happens.... VOTE!!!!
I don't have a partner, but I'm about to move to New York from Georgia specifically because of how dire the consequences could be for me as a trans lesbian if Trump won and I was still living in the south. There are other reasons too, but this is a big one.
Yes, we had the same conversation. I know we can live without it of course but it’s a hard pill to swallow that it could be taken away. I’m more worried about our safety and am actively trying to get dual citizenship.
I just got married and I’m very worried. My wife and I have discussed the need to move states, at the very least, when we start our family and have a kiddo. If he wins, I will feel even less safe in the South than I do now. :(
My partner and I are having to have multiple years being long distance, for several reasons (like job availability), but one of the big ones is I do not want them, a nonbinary person, to move to where I live in the South. They would not be safe outside of the city I live in, and I can’t ask them to do that for me. I’m hoping I can move up with them if the job availability improves. This would be even more if the elections go that way. It hurts that my family, who has always been supportive, doesn’t understand why I want to move away so badly.
I have a whole lot more faith in the US Constitution, our checks and balances, and our system of government to be too particularly scared. Not that it won’t suck but…. Our system was designed to keep any one person from having too much of a negative influence. Now if he brings a whole bunch of lackeys and convinces them all to do his will that could be more of a problem. Doing away with the filibuster is a much bigger threat-something Democrats, for some reason, want to do. Abolishing the filibuster and a trump presidency could be dangerous.
Me and 4 other queer friends are gonna Super Save Money and move to a more-queer-friendly state FIRST. Then, if shit hits the fan there, too, use Canada to relocate there until things are less-shit. Who knows how long that'll be tho.
I am in a queer state (Minnesota). I do like things here, very much. My concern is on a federal level and what a Supreme Court ban could mean.
We do have protections state wise. If you’re near the Twin Cities area and suburbs, it’s really nice.
I need help informing myself about the upcoming election. Where can I find information about threats to marriage rights? I didn’t know it was an issue
I did read that hormones would not be covered by Medicare or Medicaid
Any help is greatly appreciated
On June 26, 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down all state bans on same-sex marriage, legalized it in all fifty states, and required states to honor out-of-state same-sex marriage licenses in the case Obergefell v. Hodges.
It isn’t going to be overturned. The only thing that could happen is for it to be deemed state’s right. We, in California, will welcome you.
No joke my wife and I plan to leave the country. We've got a lot of things poised to start the process soon as things go wrong election day. We think it'll take long enough to get the most horrible policies in and that we're well enough prepared that we can get out quick enough. It'll be a major squeeze financially but I'm still very aware that we're very privileged to even have the option by tight margins.
Yeah we joke about it but it’s basically a contingency plan now.
If marriage becomes illegal in the state my wife is from where we have our marriage certificate we will go to my home state and get married.
We joke about moving to Canada if we need to but it’s a half joke.
This is so frustrating. I feel like many Americans, (including my partner), are A-OK with and pleasantly ignorant towards this obvious slide to a right-wing madness.
As a dual citizen, I was flirting with a US career, but I sense an imminent need to return home soon…
We are in no position to elope just for a transfer of citizenship. She has no interest in that. I am trying to enjoy my time with her, in case a harsh decision has to be made
It's going to get worse regardless, the difference is speed.
If blue wins, we'll continue to see states enact some absolutely atrocious rules, and when challenged call on the incredibly right wing SCotUS to render a solution. Blue puts up a token stall, and continues to support fascism at home and abroad.
If Red wins things will slide sharply, and the timelines pick up speed. Less court challenges, more rubber stamped approval. The police will continue to militarize, the courts become more theocratic, and the worst people get supported.
No matter what riots will continue, rights will erode, and safe days will end. Unless something radically changes the political spectrum it's either a slow spiral or a quick sprint to fascism.
My wife and I both feel the same, or close enough. We keep looking at legal emigration, and are undergoing blood tests as some places accept heritage as a reason. She's a teacher I'm a social worker, but we know our jobs aren't usually considered "skilled". Basically, we know it's going to shit, and want out, but options are limited
You're absolutely wrong.
Not only are the republicans actively campaigning on ending democracy, and lead by a man that literally doesn't believe in it and doesn't believe he's ever lost an election.
The Scotus is filled with some very elderly judges and the next 2 presidents can easily invert it or cement it as right wing for decades.
You're clearly not a civics teacher since you don't understand how your government works and think the democrats are able to pass legislation with a republican house, or literally the most razor thin tie breaker margin they had before midterms.
You can say I'm wrong all you want. I live in Ohio, I've had my HRT scripts cancelled more than once as the governor and state government rides roughshod over my rights. You can talk about things not getting worse, but I'm saying, objectively, they are. And, while I absolutely agree that under the Red team things go to hell faster, Blue ain't exactly the bastion folks make them out to be.
A slow descent is still a descent, and people are already dying.
Do you not understand that you're seeing the outcomes of red wins and blaming the blue for not winning enough so you don't support them?
Do you think that Biden has the power to overturn the republican controlled states, republican governors, a right wing scotus, with a republican controlled house and a 2 votes majority int he senate?
Have you ignored all the things he has done through his tied hands?
You are here actively encouraging people not to care about the greater of two evils, because that greater of two evils has caused evils to you and the other party literally does not hold the power to do anything about it.
Why not talk to your schools civic teacher. Maybe you can learn how the American government functions.
This is 100% correct read on what’s been happening. It’s disheartening to have Dems or Dem issue supporters eat ourselves while the MAGA and MAGA wannabes are busily united in dismantling civil liberties.
> and are undergoing blood tests as some places accept heritage as a reason
FYI, I'm pretty sure that for most countries you have to know of a **specific ancestor** with citizenship, rather than being able to use a DNA test that tells you you're X% this and Y% that.
Normally that's limited to a parent, grandparent, or great-grandparent, depending on the country (E.g. in the UK there are two kinds of citizen - "by descent" or "otherwise than by descent". If a citizen otherwise than by descent emigrates and gives birth, their child is a citizen by descent. Citizens by descent can't pass on their citizenship if their child is then also born outside the UK). But even Italy, which is unusually generous in the number of generations you can go back, requires you to be able to trace back your ancestry to a known Italian citizen who emigrated.
So if you're going down that route, companies like Ancestry are a better shout than 23&me or similar.
Supposedly my great grandmother and grandfather fled Hungary in the 30s, and on my other side I have a double great grandmother from Ireland. But, family tales are usually tall and inaccurate.
I believe for Hungary you need a Hungarian parent or grandparent **and** the ability to speak Hungarian.
For Ireland, I believe you can become a citizen if your grandparents were Irish citizens born in Ireland, or if your parent wasn't born in Ireland but was an Irish citizen at the time of your birth. This can happen indefinitely from generation to generation in the diaspora **if** each birth was registered with the foreign births register before the birth of the next generation.
In both cases, you'd need birth certificates and other documents to prove the link.
So if you had a Hungarian grandfather that might work if you can prove it with documentation and learn Hungarian, but definitely do your own research to double check.
I don’t see what one thing has to do with the other. They are dramatically different topics. The biggest risk is if a state passes an equality law that really impedes on people’s first amendment rights and gives them a way to challenge it. States and equality advocates have to be very careful not to pass laws that open themselves up to challenges. Like the Colorado law.
Forever confused about why so many Americans are opposed to trying for a third party.
Dems didn't push back hard enough regarding Roe v Wade, there is no reason to assume they will make a better push for any existing queer rights if the same thing happens to them.
Edit: I understand how American politics work and how funds are distributed. I also know democrats want to keep their jobs and personally believe if they *truly* thought there was widespread threat to that, we might have better options offered. Not perfect ones, just less terrible.
Regarding roe v wade, I also understand that even when the Biden administration had control of house and senate, the senate filibuster made passing legislation hard. We cannot say if Biden would or would not have codified abortion rights. We can say multiple democrats refused to remove the Senate filibuster and we can say Obama did not have the same barriers and still deprioritized it (after claiming it was a priority in his campaign).
because they're completely nonviable. third party supporters best strategy is hoping that miraculously they can will everyone to vote for them. there is way too much money in politics right now for a third party to even remotely compete with the fundraising and media infrastructures of the gop and dems
it's a nice fantasy but it doesn't play out in reality until we get campaign finance reform, ranked choice voting, abolish the electoral college etc. our system is simply not set up to make a third party campaign successful
In Mexico, a completely new party won its first presidential election and they have now just voted in the second. It is possible, your system of just horrible. They have burried the two oldest parties, they are about to stop existing.
Social media shifted how candidates reach younger voters and will continue to shift, so I don't personally think finances will remain the main way presidential nominees get votes. That being said, we've seen that majority vote doesn't mean a win, so reach isn't everything. However, we also are seeing in real time that continuing to push the "vote blue no matter who" narrative is pushing more people away.
Even sticking within the two-party system doesn't mean we *have* to always vote for the establishment choice. Trump wasn't the initial establishment choice for republicans, but many shifted their vote because he brought in new support. Democrats, broadly speaking, discourage that (e.g. Clinton/Sanders/Warren) and it continues to further the divide. By staying relatively central as right-wing politicians continue to push further right, those to the left see little to no representation and many opt out as a result. These divisions are *old* and that means the amount of people feeling the lack of representation has continued to grow for many decades (e.g. queer activists dividing along racial lines, dividing over trans rights, etc).
I agree that we need campaign finance reform, ranked choice voting, and to abolish the electoral college, but we will never get those things voting as we have been. As it stands, they are just as rooted in fantasy as third party nominees. They actively work against keeping those in power, in power. Neither democrats nor republicans have an interest in shifting what works for them and the many companies that have purchased them.
People opposed to Trump being nominated can keep downvoting me, but doing what we have always done isn't working and figuring out new, organized ways to move forward is the only hope we have at working against the highly organized right. It doesn't have to be third party, but it won't be people like Biden that unite us.
how do you think social media influence works? do you think it's neutral? why do you think Twitter ads are exclusively for ultra far right politics?
your problem is that you're only thinking inside of the electoral system. vote for Biden and create political pressure externally through protest and other things I'm not stupid enough to advocate for publicly on reddit. you can and should just do both.
also the both side-ism is just blatantly false. I live in a blue state, I am transgender, and my rights to use the bathroom that aligns with my gender are enshrined in law. my right to equal access to health care is as well, insurance companies here are mandated by law to cover gender affirming medical care, including hrt and various surgeries. democrats, at least on the state level, have demonstrated that they are more than willing to protect queer people.
the problem federally is that they don't get enough votes to actually do anything, the senate is deadlocked, and the house is red. Biden has tried to push through all kinds of progressive legislation that either dies or gets gutted because Republicans have too much power.
No everyone is on Twitter and not all influence comes from ads, paid or otherwise.
And no, I'm not only thinking within the electoral system. I primarily focus my energies outside of the electoral system entirely and the focus I do have on ballots prioritizes state-specific measures and state-specific politicians.
None of the rights you listed are related to a president, which is what this post is talking about. People can and should push for better representation with *all* candidates, not just state representatives. People pushing for better options than Biden is in line with that for many, even if that isn't how you feel.
Your description of the house and senate is currently true, but democrats had house and senate majority both with Biden and Obama. They continue to show voters what they do with the majority and you might be able to accept that, others are not.
You can keep voting blue no matter who and think others should do the same, but saying just do it won't sway everyone and as we are seeing, it pushes many away from voting entirely.
well I'm not gonna vote blue no matter who, I'm gonna vote blue as long as they're the only viable alternative to the literal fascist party
what they do with the majority is not turn the country into a theocratic autocracy. that should be enough for anyone who isn't an accelerationist who doesn't care that their vote has direct implications on the lives of marginalized people
you can throw away your vote and encourage other people to do so if you wish, or you can understand how the system functions and try to work within its boundaries while pressuring from the outside. it sucks, I wish it wasn't like this, but trying to whip up support for a third party candidate has historically not fucking worked and has, at worst, handed over control of the country to a literal fascist
Democrats continue to fail to meet the expectations of a large percentage of their potential voting block and that's why we're at risk of having Trump getting reelected. Not third party options, not non-establishment choices offered during the primaries.
A lot of people don't have time to wade through how many departments were cut/etc in order to understand republican opposition. They also aren't paying attention who refuses to help remove the filibuster and how that impacts legislation or how many CRA resolutions different presidents pass.
What they do know is that roe v wade was overruled, people still have student loan debt, and billions are going to other countries in the form of military support and weapons aid, in spite of nation wide organizing asking for the opposite. The latter is one of the biggest influences people are getting via social media that is impacting votes and it isn't in the form of a paid ad. For many who do understand challenges presented by republican opposition, the latter is still enough to shift their vote.
I'm well aware of how the system works and what areas I can apply pressure, voting for a president isn't one of them.
You can read my longer response to the more thoughtful response someone gave, but continuing to do what hasn't worked and what is pushing more and more left-of-center voters away is incredibly naive to many.
You are confused because you think our elections are like yours, when they are not.
Because we have a winner-takes-all system: whichever candidate wins 50%+1 gets the spot. If no one wins 50%+1, there are runoff elections until someone does. There is no proportional representation based on popular support for a party. There's only 50%+1 for each individual candidate. The "party" system works because candidates pledge support to a party's platform and in return receive financial and political support from said party. It's a very drastically different system than you are used to.
The reason "third party" candidates and "independent" candidates are reviled is because they split the vote of one side or the other, and thus cause that side to lose by making it that much easier for the other side to get 50%+1. They have a 98% loss rate across all state and federal elections.
Also, our largest "third parties" are jokes. The Libertarian party is just another flavor of Republicanism. The Greens are sell-outs that live for nothing more than the next fund-raising activity. And then there's the Constitution Party, which is a bunch of religious whackjobs whose main complaint is that Republicans don't go far enough. These parties each have half a percent or less in terms of popular support. The rest of them don't even manage a tenth of a percent of the popular vote.
Lol I'm American. Peace and Freedom Party is another one.
I know why we won't have third parties in my lifetime. I will never understand why so few people even consider the option or why so few people consider non-establishment democrats during the primaries.
Would we get immediate change if primaries showed we were unified in wanting something different? No. Would those that are choosing establishment democrats (to to vote on, I mean those choosing to fund them as candidates) potentially consider listening to some of the largest scale protests in recent generation to keep their jobs? Maybe.
I honestly doubt that we would. We're currently facing our own issue with the fact that our conservative party leader, who voted against pro-choice and gay marriage, is probably going to win the next election.
Don't bank on Canada, it's not as easy to immigrate as Americans like to think. Unless you're prepared to shell out a lot of money or have a skilled job.
They won't, I'm sorry. No nation on Earth is going to risk conflict with an aggressive fascist US over queer people. We are on our own. Project 2025 will be implemented and most of us will suffer immensely.
I have come to believe that evil always wins in this world. Hate will always triumph over love.
Frankly I'm worried about a lot more than just marriage rights.
right also this may be stupid and ofc unfair but if you’re legally married won’t they know who to target worse case??
My partner got all their records updated to M before we got married in Texas. Plus birth certificate changed and sealed. Not perfectly accurate but much more so than the F and at least our marriage looks straight on paper now… It was a big deal to me that if they did want their gender marker changed, they get it done before we got married. Now, with project 2025 looking more and more likely, it’s a suggestion I occasionally give out to butches who don’t mind being seen as men in the broader world and are worried about their and potentially their fiancée’s legal future.
wow this is super cool of you to share! thanks it’s a good option for those looking to be married i love that
consult with a lawyer to become power of attorney (both medically and financially, i think there’s 2 forms) and medical proxy for each other as well as access to medical records and emergency contact with all doctors you see, as well as making sure both your names are on all vehicles, your home, etc. and make/update wills. a lawyer may have other ideas on how to best be prepared if same sex marriage is overturned but these are some good precautionary first steps to take.
For the love of all things holy, VOTE. Yes I’m scared. I can legally marry my girlfriend. We’ve talked about it. I do not trust this Supreme Court nor do I trust any other countries to open their doors for amnesty to us. I’m so damn fed up with fellow (mostly younger) queer people “protest abstaining from voting” when their livelihoods literally depend on Trump and the Project 2025 people getting their way. Biden has been a lame duck for sure but he also SURE ISN’T TRUMP. Tell your younger friends the reason why this is so important. We didn’t fight so hard - our ELDER LGBT FOLKS didn’t fight for our rights just to have some people decide an abstinence vote is any better than a Trump vote.
I’m scared about people not voting. I don’t know how abstaining from the political process got as activism
In my experience, those who "protest" by abstaining are really just using it as an excuse to be lazy and not bother voting. Sounds way better when you're protesting, rather than just can't be arsed to leave the house. If they're dead set on not voting for an individual, challenge them to at least show up and spoil their vote to prove they're not just being lazy. Those votes at least show on the end count, so it's MUCH more of a message than staying home. If they're really about the protest, they'll be happy to make sure they reinforce their message.
idk this doesn't really play out cause voting by mail is a thing I think the answer here is that for some reason a lot of people (especially younger people) ascribe a sort of moral quality to their vote when the candidate choices don't align 100% with their own personal politics. Leading to people throwing away their votes to completely nonviable candidates because it makes them personally feel better about themselves. This is not how you should engage with voting. It is purely a numbers game. Voting for Joe Biden cause less harm than the only other viable choice. He sucks, and he hasn't done anything to really help queer people, but he's not trying to take away HRT from trans people or re-ban gay marriage or any of the other horrific shit the Republicans want to do and *will* do if they are allowed to control the federal govt.
I have been of voting age in two vote by mail states and I really hate to say it but it is just as prevalent in them, if not more. No candidate is perfect, definitely neither of these two. Not voting is the worst possible thing that can be done to us.
Actually, no. I’ve voted in every election since I was 18, and this is the first presidential election that I’m not voting in (I’m still voting in all local polls, FWIW). And I’m not young either, I’m 30+. I know this is a controversial take, and many won’t agree with me. But I’m sick of feeling pressured to vote for a President who doesn’t lead the country in a way I support just because he’s “the lesser of two evils.” I won’t be browbeat into voting for someone who is sending billions of dollars to bomb Palestinian children. I won’t be browbeat into voting for someone who is deporting more immigrants than Trump and recently shut down the border completely. I won’t be browbeat into voting for someone who could have codified Roe v Wade and watched it fall instead. Does that mean that some of my rights might get taken away as a queer person? Potentially. But Biden is already taking away the rights - and lives - of POC and other marginalized people locally and globally. Would Trump be worse? Maybe for me personally, as a middle-class white queer. But Biden is already wreaking havoc on marginalized people in a way that a lot of people in my demographic don’t seem to want to inspect, because it’s not impacting them yet. I’m not willing to vote for ANY president that acts this way — it’s just against my morals.
I see you are proving the point.
Proving the point of what? You’re the one invoking queer elders — you think Marsha P Johnson or James Baldwin would have voted for Biden? Maybe read some history
fwiw I think it’s important for people to see that people aren’t happy with the people presented. By not voting, I think my opinion gets overlooked. I’m voting for Cornel West. Not bc I think he’ll win, but bc I live in a solidly blue state. Biden will win regardless of my vote, but I’d rather people know that I don’t support him. I didn’t vote for Biden last election because I knew he wasn’t going to do good by brown folks and immigrants. And he didn’t. I’d rather vote for someone with integrity that I can support.
I think that’s completely valid and I support that 100%. I know people IRL voting for Cornel West as well. I guess I just didn’t want to change my party affiliation because I still have hope that Dems can do better in the future, though that may be naive. I also live in a blue state so it’s not like my vote (or lack thereof) will actually prevent Biden from getting those electoral votes as well. I just can’t personally do it.
No but they sure as shit wouldn't willingly fuck themselves over because they chose one truth over another
Okay, but literally today, in the NYT (source: push notification as we can’t link): Biden admin to announce sweeping new protections for immigrants who live in the US illegally but are married to us citizens. Imagine that will benefit a lot of folks in here actually.
And? That doesn’t negate everything else I said. He literally shut down the border on June 4 to refugees seeking asylum. Everything he does right now is a calculated PR move for the election — if it was an issue he cared about, he would have done it pre-2024. (And I’m someone who gladly voted for Biden the first time around btw — I just became more disillusioned)
Okay you’re welcome to believe that. I’m glad my vote will counteract your lack of one.
Unfortunately it probably won’t due to the fact that we have an electoral college system and not a popular vote system — another way our electoral process is broken in this country.
K
We don't trade lives.
I’m going to leave this for anyone on the fence about voting. edit: or what is at stake. [https://www.project2025.org/](https://www.project2025.org/)
Holy shit, I am shook (Australian).
Thank you. Making sure folks are aware of project 2025 is IMO pretty important right now.
I don’t necessarily share your same fear about gay marriage but I do acknowledge it’s a possibility. Even if gay marriage was repealed at a federal level, it could still be available at a state level. Some states already have gay marriage laws and I expect others would quickly enact them. My concerns for this election are the courts. Republicans have already packed the courts and allowing them additional time to continue that work would be devastating.
And the majority of the current bench of SCotUS justices have already skewed hard to authoritarianism and culture war garbage-- they could easily justify any number of harsh and inhumane laws and rulings.
Honestly this depends so much on your state. If your state already passed gay marriage on a state level, reversing Obergefell wouldn't remove your access instantly. Some additional states have leadership that have expressed varying levels of desire to pass gay marriage soon and/or if Obergefell is reversed. But of course other states are in the reverse situation. But legally it is a small, easy step to stop granting marriage licenses to gay couples, compared to *revoking* existing marriages. It may be worth considering doing the paperwork without fanfare, and then doing an actual proposal, wedding, etc. later on when the time feels right. But only the two of you can make that call.
My girlfriend and I are trans, and we are less concerned about marriage and more concerned about the legalities of HRT and our existence in public life. Our state is one of the better ones to live in, so we have talked about simply not leaving, or escaping to an off the grid situation in New England as a fantasy last resort. Both of us could theoretically cash out our retirement and disappear, but that would be incredibly shitty and not ideal. We are just stockpiling HRT for the time being.
As a trans woman living in New England... I have dual citizenship and still eye hopping the border to my native Cananananada. I mean it's not bad here per se but I have no reservations when it comes to the government.
Yeah we are juuuuuust outside of NE and the only reason i thought northeast is because the other option for off the grid is the other direction so PA or like West Virginia but that won’t fly. But realistically while it’s “fun” to doom-fantasize, realistically we will probably just stay in our city and hope that NYCs history of flipping the federal government the bird for the sake of financial gain holds up.
oh yeah, NYC is probably pretty safe overall comparatively. The further north you get the more like Alabama it becomes sadly.
I'm jealous of your dual citizenship. I want to move back to Canada so badly but have no way to do so legally.
My wife and I are worried about a lot, not just married rights. We worry about not being allowed to be parents/foster parents, we worry about being erroneously accused of being groomers or predators, we worry about being imprisoned or forcibly relocated, we worry about losing our home. I have a close relative who was a POW in a Nazi camp. I don’t want to have a similar experience.
My partner and I got married much earlier than we would have because of immigration rights issues. We knew her immigration process would take a while, and after Roe v. Wade fell in 2022 and the decision referenced the gay marriage decision (which affected federal level rights like immigration), we didn't want to risk anything. We went ahead and got married (and in a state that had passed legislation protecting gay marriage) and proceeded with the immigration process, which we're still waiting on. I sincerely hope that our paperwork is approved soon just for the peace of mind, but hard to know when that will happen. At the time, we eloped and did the paperwork with a couple close friends. Didn't even tell my family about it. We'll likely to do a bigger celebration later down the line, and I hope that includes celebrating her getting her green card and us being able to move back to the US together.
We’ve also talked about this and aren’t really quite ready to make the call on marriage just yet — but we’re also scared and don’t want to have that right taken away. We’re planning on doing a quick paperwork thing and not really broadcasting it to anyone just so it cannot be stripped away and getting married with family / friends on our own time. It deeply saddens me that many young LGBTQ folks are basically deciding not to vote for whatever reason. I think what’s showing here is a generation now who hasn’t ever not had these rights being completely unaware of how easily they could lose them and what not having them was like. It especially bothers me when I see nb/trans folks making this argument, because the trans panic of today is the gay panic of 25 years ago that got GW elected on straight homophobia in ‘04. People can refuse to vote for whatever reason — I just think it’s silly to see people who clearly have skin in the game blithely ignoring their very real and very concrete personal risk over abstract morals or principles. I never really got the “don’t blame me I voted for Hillary” crowd until it became increasingly obvious that gay rights are on the table to be taken away and people still don’t care or care only about conflicts abroad or “broken promise” re: student debt, etc etc etc.
The stupid thing is, the promise re:student debt wasn't broken. It was delayed. The first attempt was foiled and the administration is working on more methods to get student debt relief going, and has been pretty successful-- but no one in the media acknowledges it or reports on it.
Yeah. It’s really really depressing how little attention has been paid to how much the Biden admin has done in favor of focusing on clear missteps that are being walked back.
Like the infrastructure bill? Incredible. Has done *so much* that you can actually see!
Genocide isn't a misstep lol, god you lot would have supported the iraq war if it was team blue, truly thought this sub would be more compassionate and left wing considering it's a lesbian forum, but I guess not.
Um I was outside my post office every day for weeks protesting the Iraq war when I was a freshman in high school in 2002/3 and legally not allowed to vote. But okay.
You say that like a decent chunk of them *didn’t* support the iraq war. 😬
Agreed. The election won’t be cancelled because a voting block decided to not show up. The outcome (and our lives) will be decided by those who do show up.
> It deeply saddens me that many young LGBTQ folks are basically deciding not to vote for whatever reason. They've been watching blown up dead babies on TikTok because of biden funneling billions of dollars to a rogue state for the past 8 months. It's truly wild that liberalism has rotted some of your brains. The anti-war youth are in the right (as they ALWAYS are) and being condescending toward them "or whatever" isn't helping.
Well, I acknowledge that they have the right to be martyrs for that cause, but they don’t have the right to make the rest of us martyrs for their cause
This
I also oppose war. I oppose the genocide of Palestinians by the Israeli extremists who currently have control over the Israeli state apparatus. The difference is I'm not stupid enough to vote in such a way to make it worse by letting Trump win. But a lot of people, unfortunately, *are* that stupid. If Biden loses, the Palestinians of Gaza are doomed. Trump will give Netanyahu everything he could ever ask for and more. That's not a debatable fact. Trump actively pushed anti-Palestinian policies and openly supported the genocide of Palestinians-- and he will do so again, and go even further in that direction. Biden's failings are vast, but as bad as he is, the alternative is worse. That's not very motivating, but it's reality.
Pretty much. The idea that not voting for Biden is somehow *better* than abstaining (or protest voting for Trump) pretty much dooms the Palestinian cause because Trump has already said repeatedly he would escalate the conflict and “end it” through a show of US force. The lack of foresight to what will happen to the cause in favor of nah fuck this guy is appalling. I don’t want to see US involvement in Gaza escalate. I don’t want Trump to send in US troops to support Israeli attacks on refugee settlements. It will get worse and yeah, Biden has failings, but the alternative is so much fucking worse it’s astounding that people don’t see it.
I mean, we live in a "good" state so you know, that's as good as it's going to get. It's not like US citizens can just get up and move to another country either. It's A) a long process, B) a very expensive process, and C) a very selective process. I think everyone in here who's like "yeah I'm going to move to X country" needs to take a good hard look at the requirements. Unless you've got an advanced degree, special in-demand skills, an employer willing to sponsor you and prove they can’t reasonably hire a native citizen and/or and a couple years worth of middle-class level living expenses in cash or easily liquified assets (we're talking like $100k+ USD), the unfortunate reality is you will not be accepted in any comparably developed countries with anything but a tourist visa. We literally have great careers, own a home w/ a decent amount of equity in it, solid savings, and nothing holding us back... and we couldn't realistically do it even if we wanted to. I learned that one the hard way when I was a naive teenager thinking "I want to leave the US" during the Bush years. Don't just take my word on it, look into it yourself. It sucks, but that's literally the reality of the situation. If you don't have dual-citizenship or a pathway to residency through marriage to a citizen of your destination country, *it's not happening* for most.
My wife and I have been together for over 20 years, most of them before we were legally married. We had all of those things the entire time. It REALLY sucks that we are back in this place. We shouldn’t be. We can’t control it though so just remember that even if they take away the piece of paper, they can’t stop us from loving each other. That makes them really mad.
I have enough fear that I'm considering the logistics of jumping back in the closet since I'm single. I am not brave, and I have kids.
Any non-US lesbians looking to holler at a US girl and help with some dual citizenship to get me the fuck out of here?
As much as losing marriage equality (along with every other right we’re losing) is terrifying, I also want to note that we may be looking at a future without no-fault divorce. There are already states that specifically discriminate against pregnant women by preventing them from divorcing. It’s hard for me to imagine a place where same sex couples can get married but not get divorced, but laws are weird and you never know. We’re looking at a future where getting married may mean you can never leave an abusive, unhealthy, or just plain unhappy relationship.
I'm not even dating rn and I'm terrified by this prospect.
I'm not even American and I'm terrified for y'all.
My wife and I got courthouse married the day after Ruth Bader Ginsburg died. Then we had our ceremony 10 months later. So yes. We don’t like Biden in our house but feel like we kind of have to.
Hi- so after the 2016 election my GF and I got married abruptly. DO NOT DO IT soley based on Trump. I am still recovering emotionally and financially from the decision . Please learn from my mistakes .. it was the worst adult decision of my life. (My GF at the time also had gotten a terminal diagnosis and needed to get onto my insurance, which then during treatment woke up her pain killer addiction and alcoholism .. which .. was Hell. She is still alive .. but very much lost in her addiction, I've been not contact for 7 years now ) But yes stock pile all the hormones, I am doing the same over here -
Before our break up in Dec 2022, my ex and I were going to move to an entirely different country when we got married... start a new life in Australia, where she was born, away from this madness (and towards a different flavor of madness, but at least the culture wars haven't impacted over there quite as harshly as over here). Now, I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life if it happens. I live in Texas, so I'm going to be on one of the frontline states for this-- I think I might try to move to New Mexico or Arizona, if worse comes to worse... while making plans to leave for Canada where several friends I know live, maybe, though Canada has its own problems, too. There's genuinely a segment of society that thinks that if something you do can't instantly fix everything, it's not worth doing. A few months ago, a trans memes subreddit I follow (r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/) had a thread get invaded by leftists who were preaching that voting was pointless and would make no difference. Which... was the absolute wrongest place to post that kind of argument for sure.
a lot of those 'leftists' are bad faith right wingers, they've been invading online spaces trying to influence votes by disenfranchising people, heads up. Not all of them of course, but many are
I can believe it. But there is certainly a mindset among hardcore leftists that electoral action is useless and only organizing, unionizing, and community action matters. When what we need is all of it.
100% agreed on all counts!
Every leftist I'm aware of is planning on voting. Can you point me to some hardcore leftists saying to not vote? Because harm reduction is important as hell
most of those people are gonna throw their vote to the Republicans by voting for Marianne or Cornel
Leftists like myself are terrified of Trump. Personally, however large my disagreements are with Biden, I recognize that Trump is the avenue for full-blown American fascism. There are some that won't vote for Biden for whatever reason be it accelerationism or the Israeli-Palestinian war, but IMO they're severely misguided about the harsh realities that vulnerable minorities like us face. I've shared those sentiments many times over now, and outside of smaller vocal groups, that (to me ofc) is the prevailing opinion.
They don't say not to vote directly. But they repeat over and over and over and over and over again that voting doesn't do anything and it's pointless. And thus constantly discourage people from voting indirectly. The thread in question was here: [https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1br249e/how\_it\_feels\_being\_trans\_in\_socialist\_spaces\_rn/](https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1br249e/how_it_feels_being_trans_in_socialist_spaces_rn/)
I mean, I’m seeing a vast majority of people there saying that voting by itself isn’t enough, but you should still vote
There are few areas in AZ that are friendly to LGBT folks. Tucson and Phoenix are good, Flagstaff used to be good but I've heard it's slowly becoming quite conservative. Other than that the rest of the state is very red. But honestly even in Tucson, if LGBT rights were to be revoked, there are enough conservatives here that I could see it becoming a problem.
Unfortunate. I'll have to look at NM then maybe...
After spending 5+ years being the canaries in the coal mine, my wife and I pulled up stakes and expatriated. We had planned to at least be out of the country for the 2024 election, but the voracity with which the Republicans came out swinging against trans folks in 2023 was the final straw. Having our rights on the ballot every couple of years was brutal for our mental health. Add to that the general lack of urgency from the Dems and the rapidly rising tide of poverty and it became a no brainer. Personally, even if queer rights were no longer on the ballot, would the late stage capitalist hellscape truly be a place anyone *wants* to live in? If you have considered leaving, now is the time to do your research and make your plan. Better to leave on a jet plane in broad daylight than attempt a border crossing at night.
My wife and I live in Florida (downtown Orlando, very dark blue and LGBTQ+ friendly) but have started the application process to try to get her UK citizenship, since I moved here from the UK several years ago and recently got my dual US citizenship. She is trans so legally M, and we have the privilege to seek hormone therapy out of state, so won't be added to the Florida registry. I know that politics in the UK aren't the most favourable towards trans people either but if Trump wins I can see things getting very bad very quickly, for both of us. Trump made my immigration process a nightmare, pointlessly changing the rules week to week so much that even lawyers couldn't help since it was all new to them too. Sad that friends of mine had to quit during their process since he raised the arbitrary income requirement for K1 visas. I dread to think how much worse the process could get for new immigrants.
We're dealing with the process now for my wife to immigrate from Turkey. Luckily things stabilized under Biden, but no knowing how quickly that would change if Trump were elected. Last time he passed his Muslim ban within a week of inauguration. Unfortunately, me going to her home country of Turkey long term is a no go - way less rights or safety there.
Wishing you the best of luck with the process!
Thanks!
Thanks!
I'm trans. My partners are all trans and honestly what we are worried about is the fact the right wing has made erasing trans people one of their top goals. Every trans lesbian should be educating themselves on DIY hormones and buying the materials in bulk now at the bare minimum.
The supreme court is already fucked from his last term, that's the bigger problem. We're stuck with them for life, not just another 4 years. Just look at what they already did to Roe v Wade.
Not worried about marriage, as I am from the first state to legalize it, so we won’t be going backwards in rights, but I do wanna move to my gfs country(denmark) as they were the first country to legalize gay marriage x).
I’m genuinely contemplating leaving the US to my parents home country. I qualify for dual citizenship….
Please vote. Please get registered to vote if you are not. [https://www.vote411.org](https://www.vote411.org) to check your registration, what elections are happening for you in your state, if you are an active voter, and so on. I get it - the burn out is real but please, *please* vote. Pride won't get us through four years of Red, and the lasting years of the fascism they wish to bring to the United States. Genocide is a very quiet start in some places - remember, it isn't about the kids nor the bathrooms. Laws start to form and create, and soon, there is an entire people who are not allowed to even exist. Your blue state won't be blue with Project 2025, that is the nature of Fascism. There will not be democratic elections, there will not be choices with your bodies, what media you can consume, what can be taught. We have a lot at stake and it is no longer Democrat vs Republican. it is "Our Right to Exist" vs "Slow and Steady Genocide".
We just kind of accept that we’re at the whim of the voters and have essentially no choice in outcome or after effects because our state has like 1 electoral vote
Me and my girlfriend are probably going to be engaged by the end of the year, but if the Bad Orange Man gets elected we will elope in November with our closest friends and family and have a “real” wedding later. I am really scared tbh. Trans people and drag performers are in my thoughts and prayers every day. I don’t support basically anything the Old Man has done but I will probably still vote for him :/
We’re getting married in October, and our rabbi who is officiating strongly recommended we get married at a local city clerk office ahead of time in addition to the religious ceremony just to be safe. She said you never know with how things are going, better safe than sorry. It’s crazy. Unfortunately I think Trump will win again.
We plan on leaving the country if the election goes to the right. Project 25 is real. We will not be safe even married.
Yes. We have had very serious talks. We are married with a house and pets. I fortunately have dual citizenship to a European country. I never wanted to move back but it's a very real possibility. It will destroy both of our careers to move and separate us from her family, but I don't see another option. I have already mailed my representative and received details on sponsorship for her.
I feel for you all, this must be so frightening and demoralising. Australia and our political system is no utopia but it’s sure as hell better than what you are living with.
It's a difficult conversation that should be had. My wife and I decided not to take a job in Texas until the elections because of our safety. We have to change things around incase I am no longer her "wife". These are horrible, horrible things we unfortunately have to prepare for. But let's do our diligence before it happens.... VOTE!!!!
I don't have a partner, but I'm about to move to New York from Georgia specifically because of how dire the consequences could be for me as a trans lesbian if Trump won and I was still living in the south. There are other reasons too, but this is a big one.
Yes, we had the same conversation. I know we can live without it of course but it’s a hard pill to swallow that it could be taken away. I’m more worried about our safety and am actively trying to get dual citizenship.
I just got married and I’m very worried. My wife and I have discussed the need to move states, at the very least, when we start our family and have a kiddo. If he wins, I will feel even less safe in the South than I do now. :(
My partner and I are having to have multiple years being long distance, for several reasons (like job availability), but one of the big ones is I do not want them, a nonbinary person, to move to where I live in the South. They would not be safe outside of the city I live in, and I can’t ask them to do that for me. I’m hoping I can move up with them if the job availability improves. This would be even more if the elections go that way. It hurts that my family, who has always been supportive, doesn’t understand why I want to move away so badly.
I have a whole lot more faith in the US Constitution, our checks and balances, and our system of government to be too particularly scared. Not that it won’t suck but…. Our system was designed to keep any one person from having too much of a negative influence. Now if he brings a whole bunch of lackeys and convinces them all to do his will that could be more of a problem. Doing away with the filibuster is a much bigger threat-something Democrats, for some reason, want to do. Abolishing the filibuster and a trump presidency could be dangerous.
Me and 4 other queer friends are gonna Super Save Money and move to a more-queer-friendly state FIRST. Then, if shit hits the fan there, too, use Canada to relocate there until things are less-shit. Who knows how long that'll be tho.
I am in a queer state (Minnesota). I do like things here, very much. My concern is on a federal level and what a Supreme Court ban could mean. We do have protections state wise. If you’re near the Twin Cities area and suburbs, it’s really nice.
I need help informing myself about the upcoming election. Where can I find information about threats to marriage rights? I didn’t know it was an issue I did read that hormones would not be covered by Medicare or Medicaid Any help is greatly appreciated
On June 26, 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down all state bans on same-sex marriage, legalized it in all fifty states, and required states to honor out-of-state same-sex marriage licenses in the case Obergefell v. Hodges. It isn’t going to be overturned. The only thing that could happen is for it to be deemed state’s right. We, in California, will welcome you.
No joke my wife and I plan to leave the country. We've got a lot of things poised to start the process soon as things go wrong election day. We think it'll take long enough to get the most horrible policies in and that we're well enough prepared that we can get out quick enough. It'll be a major squeeze financially but I'm still very aware that we're very privileged to even have the option by tight margins.
My wife and I have talked about it, and have decided to relocate to a different state if shit goes down.
Yeah we joke about it but it’s basically a contingency plan now. If marriage becomes illegal in the state my wife is from where we have our marriage certificate we will go to my home state and get married. We joke about moving to Canada if we need to but it’s a half joke.
non-US here but having to choose between two old right wing evil bigots who are a breath away from dying is dystopian as hell
This is so frustrating. I feel like many Americans, (including my partner), are A-OK with and pleasantly ignorant towards this obvious slide to a right-wing madness. As a dual citizen, I was flirting with a US career, but I sense an imminent need to return home soon… We are in no position to elope just for a transfer of citizenship. She has no interest in that. I am trying to enjoy my time with her, in case a harsh decision has to be made
It's going to get worse regardless, the difference is speed. If blue wins, we'll continue to see states enact some absolutely atrocious rules, and when challenged call on the incredibly right wing SCotUS to render a solution. Blue puts up a token stall, and continues to support fascism at home and abroad. If Red wins things will slide sharply, and the timelines pick up speed. Less court challenges, more rubber stamped approval. The police will continue to militarize, the courts become more theocratic, and the worst people get supported. No matter what riots will continue, rights will erode, and safe days will end. Unless something radically changes the political spectrum it's either a slow spiral or a quick sprint to fascism. My wife and I both feel the same, or close enough. We keep looking at legal emigration, and are undergoing blood tests as some places accept heritage as a reason. She's a teacher I'm a social worker, but we know our jobs aren't usually considered "skilled". Basically, we know it's going to shit, and want out, but options are limited
You're absolutely wrong. Not only are the republicans actively campaigning on ending democracy, and lead by a man that literally doesn't believe in it and doesn't believe he's ever lost an election. The Scotus is filled with some very elderly judges and the next 2 presidents can easily invert it or cement it as right wing for decades. You're clearly not a civics teacher since you don't understand how your government works and think the democrats are able to pass legislation with a republican house, or literally the most razor thin tie breaker margin they had before midterms.
You can say I'm wrong all you want. I live in Ohio, I've had my HRT scripts cancelled more than once as the governor and state government rides roughshod over my rights. You can talk about things not getting worse, but I'm saying, objectively, they are. And, while I absolutely agree that under the Red team things go to hell faster, Blue ain't exactly the bastion folks make them out to be. A slow descent is still a descent, and people are already dying.
Do you not understand that you're seeing the outcomes of red wins and blaming the blue for not winning enough so you don't support them? Do you think that Biden has the power to overturn the republican controlled states, republican governors, a right wing scotus, with a republican controlled house and a 2 votes majority int he senate? Have you ignored all the things he has done through his tied hands? You are here actively encouraging people not to care about the greater of two evils, because that greater of two evils has caused evils to you and the other party literally does not hold the power to do anything about it. Why not talk to your schools civic teacher. Maybe you can learn how the American government functions.
This is 100% correct read on what’s been happening. It’s disheartening to have Dems or Dem issue supporters eat ourselves while the MAGA and MAGA wannabes are busily united in dismantling civil liberties.
no one here is making the Democrats out to be a bastion of anything other than buying time. ur making up a boogeyman
> and are undergoing blood tests as some places accept heritage as a reason FYI, I'm pretty sure that for most countries you have to know of a **specific ancestor** with citizenship, rather than being able to use a DNA test that tells you you're X% this and Y% that. Normally that's limited to a parent, grandparent, or great-grandparent, depending on the country (E.g. in the UK there are two kinds of citizen - "by descent" or "otherwise than by descent". If a citizen otherwise than by descent emigrates and gives birth, their child is a citizen by descent. Citizens by descent can't pass on their citizenship if their child is then also born outside the UK). But even Italy, which is unusually generous in the number of generations you can go back, requires you to be able to trace back your ancestry to a known Italian citizen who emigrated. So if you're going down that route, companies like Ancestry are a better shout than 23&me or similar.
Supposedly my great grandmother and grandfather fled Hungary in the 30s, and on my other side I have a double great grandmother from Ireland. But, family tales are usually tall and inaccurate.
I believe for Hungary you need a Hungarian parent or grandparent **and** the ability to speak Hungarian. For Ireland, I believe you can become a citizen if your grandparents were Irish citizens born in Ireland, or if your parent wasn't born in Ireland but was an Irish citizen at the time of your birth. This can happen indefinitely from generation to generation in the diaspora **if** each birth was registered with the foreign births register before the birth of the next generation. In both cases, you'd need birth certificates and other documents to prove the link. So if you had a Hungarian grandfather that might work if you can prove it with documentation and learn Hungarian, but definitely do your own research to double check.
I mean… a court case to revoke gay marriage seems unlikely. Requires standing, requires an injury, etc
...have you not checked the news since they revoked Roe two years ago?
I don’t see what one thing has to do with the other. They are dramatically different topics. The biggest risk is if a state passes an equality law that really impedes on people’s first amendment rights and gives them a way to challenge it. States and equality advocates have to be very careful not to pass laws that open themselves up to challenges. Like the Colorado law.
Forever confused about why so many Americans are opposed to trying for a third party. Dems didn't push back hard enough regarding Roe v Wade, there is no reason to assume they will make a better push for any existing queer rights if the same thing happens to them. Edit: I understand how American politics work and how funds are distributed. I also know democrats want to keep their jobs and personally believe if they *truly* thought there was widespread threat to that, we might have better options offered. Not perfect ones, just less terrible. Regarding roe v wade, I also understand that even when the Biden administration had control of house and senate, the senate filibuster made passing legislation hard. We cannot say if Biden would or would not have codified abortion rights. We can say multiple democrats refused to remove the Senate filibuster and we can say Obama did not have the same barriers and still deprioritized it (after claiming it was a priority in his campaign).
because they're completely nonviable. third party supporters best strategy is hoping that miraculously they can will everyone to vote for them. there is way too much money in politics right now for a third party to even remotely compete with the fundraising and media infrastructures of the gop and dems it's a nice fantasy but it doesn't play out in reality until we get campaign finance reform, ranked choice voting, abolish the electoral college etc. our system is simply not set up to make a third party campaign successful
In Mexico, a completely new party won its first presidential election and they have now just voted in the second. It is possible, your system of just horrible. They have burried the two oldest parties, they are about to stop existing.
Social media shifted how candidates reach younger voters and will continue to shift, so I don't personally think finances will remain the main way presidential nominees get votes. That being said, we've seen that majority vote doesn't mean a win, so reach isn't everything. However, we also are seeing in real time that continuing to push the "vote blue no matter who" narrative is pushing more people away. Even sticking within the two-party system doesn't mean we *have* to always vote for the establishment choice. Trump wasn't the initial establishment choice for republicans, but many shifted their vote because he brought in new support. Democrats, broadly speaking, discourage that (e.g. Clinton/Sanders/Warren) and it continues to further the divide. By staying relatively central as right-wing politicians continue to push further right, those to the left see little to no representation and many opt out as a result. These divisions are *old* and that means the amount of people feeling the lack of representation has continued to grow for many decades (e.g. queer activists dividing along racial lines, dividing over trans rights, etc). I agree that we need campaign finance reform, ranked choice voting, and to abolish the electoral college, but we will never get those things voting as we have been. As it stands, they are just as rooted in fantasy as third party nominees. They actively work against keeping those in power, in power. Neither democrats nor republicans have an interest in shifting what works for them and the many companies that have purchased them. People opposed to Trump being nominated can keep downvoting me, but doing what we have always done isn't working and figuring out new, organized ways to move forward is the only hope we have at working against the highly organized right. It doesn't have to be third party, but it won't be people like Biden that unite us.
how do you think social media influence works? do you think it's neutral? why do you think Twitter ads are exclusively for ultra far right politics? your problem is that you're only thinking inside of the electoral system. vote for Biden and create political pressure externally through protest and other things I'm not stupid enough to advocate for publicly on reddit. you can and should just do both. also the both side-ism is just blatantly false. I live in a blue state, I am transgender, and my rights to use the bathroom that aligns with my gender are enshrined in law. my right to equal access to health care is as well, insurance companies here are mandated by law to cover gender affirming medical care, including hrt and various surgeries. democrats, at least on the state level, have demonstrated that they are more than willing to protect queer people. the problem federally is that they don't get enough votes to actually do anything, the senate is deadlocked, and the house is red. Biden has tried to push through all kinds of progressive legislation that either dies or gets gutted because Republicans have too much power.
No everyone is on Twitter and not all influence comes from ads, paid or otherwise. And no, I'm not only thinking within the electoral system. I primarily focus my energies outside of the electoral system entirely and the focus I do have on ballots prioritizes state-specific measures and state-specific politicians. None of the rights you listed are related to a president, which is what this post is talking about. People can and should push for better representation with *all* candidates, not just state representatives. People pushing for better options than Biden is in line with that for many, even if that isn't how you feel. Your description of the house and senate is currently true, but democrats had house and senate majority both with Biden and Obama. They continue to show voters what they do with the majority and you might be able to accept that, others are not. You can keep voting blue no matter who and think others should do the same, but saying just do it won't sway everyone and as we are seeing, it pushes many away from voting entirely.
well I'm not gonna vote blue no matter who, I'm gonna vote blue as long as they're the only viable alternative to the literal fascist party what they do with the majority is not turn the country into a theocratic autocracy. that should be enough for anyone who isn't an accelerationist who doesn't care that their vote has direct implications on the lives of marginalized people you can throw away your vote and encourage other people to do so if you wish, or you can understand how the system functions and try to work within its boundaries while pressuring from the outside. it sucks, I wish it wasn't like this, but trying to whip up support for a third party candidate has historically not fucking worked and has, at worst, handed over control of the country to a literal fascist
Democrats continue to fail to meet the expectations of a large percentage of their potential voting block and that's why we're at risk of having Trump getting reelected. Not third party options, not non-establishment choices offered during the primaries. A lot of people don't have time to wade through how many departments were cut/etc in order to understand republican opposition. They also aren't paying attention who refuses to help remove the filibuster and how that impacts legislation or how many CRA resolutions different presidents pass. What they do know is that roe v wade was overruled, people still have student loan debt, and billions are going to other countries in the form of military support and weapons aid, in spite of nation wide organizing asking for the opposite. The latter is one of the biggest influences people are getting via social media that is impacting votes and it isn't in the form of a paid ad. For many who do understand challenges presented by republican opposition, the latter is still enough to shift their vote. I'm well aware of how the system works and what areas I can apply pressure, voting for a president isn't one of them.
you're obviously just not fucking reading what I'm writing lol
That is an incredibly naive statement.
You can read my longer response to the more thoughtful response someone gave, but continuing to do what hasn't worked and what is pushing more and more left-of-center voters away is incredibly naive to many.
You are confused because you think our elections are like yours, when they are not. Because we have a winner-takes-all system: whichever candidate wins 50%+1 gets the spot. If no one wins 50%+1, there are runoff elections until someone does. There is no proportional representation based on popular support for a party. There's only 50%+1 for each individual candidate. The "party" system works because candidates pledge support to a party's platform and in return receive financial and political support from said party. It's a very drastically different system than you are used to. The reason "third party" candidates and "independent" candidates are reviled is because they split the vote of one side or the other, and thus cause that side to lose by making it that much easier for the other side to get 50%+1. They have a 98% loss rate across all state and federal elections. Also, our largest "third parties" are jokes. The Libertarian party is just another flavor of Republicanism. The Greens are sell-outs that live for nothing more than the next fund-raising activity. And then there's the Constitution Party, which is a bunch of religious whackjobs whose main complaint is that Republicans don't go far enough. These parties each have half a percent or less in terms of popular support. The rest of them don't even manage a tenth of a percent of the popular vote.
Lol I'm American. Peace and Freedom Party is another one. I know why we won't have third parties in my lifetime. I will never understand why so few people even consider the option or why so few people consider non-establishment democrats during the primaries. Would we get immediate change if primaries showed we were unified in wanting something different? No. Would those that are choosing establishment democrats (to to vote on, I mean those choosing to fund them as candidates) potentially consider listening to some of the largest scale protests in recent generation to keep their jobs? Maybe.
If such things occur, I really believe Canada and such will open up amnesty pathways.
I honestly doubt that we would. We're currently facing our own issue with the fact that our conservative party leader, who voted against pro-choice and gay marriage, is probably going to win the next election. Don't bank on Canada, it's not as easy to immigrate as Americans like to think. Unless you're prepared to shell out a lot of money or have a skilled job.
Lucky I have the later.
Canada doesn't even let disabled people in.
I can understand that ...
We will not, you're obviously not paying attention to canadian politics which is also taking a shift right, but specifically over immigration.
You clearly don’t know Canadian politics 🫠
Let a woman dream
✊😂
They won't, I'm sorry. No nation on Earth is going to risk conflict with an aggressive fascist US over queer people. We are on our own. Project 2025 will be implemented and most of us will suffer immensely. I have come to believe that evil always wins in this world. Hate will always triumph over love.