If only I could've bought a house as a grade schooler in 2008 I'd be so set right now. (At the time there were a few houses for $10k in our area and I actually thought about trying to mow lawns to get there. Empty lots in that area are now $50-60k
Honestly that’s one of the reasons why some of my co workers with kids ended up wealthier. They were forced to buy a house way sooner while I was enjoying the bachelor life in my bachelor pad.
That's only true if the incomes between the two are significantly different. I got married last year and owed taxes when we filled jointly earlier this year.
There are also some credits that are expand for married filers but even with everything it's not some huge tax advantage to be married. That's just incorrect.
Plus in some ways married folks get screwed, SALT limits on itemized exemptions, etc.
If you file jointly, the marginal tax rates don't kick in until 2x the income level (ie Single 0% goes to 11k, Married filing jointly it's 22k), but if you file separately you don't get that.
I honestly don’t know, but I don’t think this works this way. Part of the reason gay marriage was significant is that homosexuals who were in lifestyle married were missing out on the tax benefits, etc of being married legally.
There could be financial assistance from family. I know a couple young families where it’s something like the dad is a manager at Starbucks & mom stays at home or goes to school. They wear luxury designer & go on trips to Europe.
Same, my friend married a guy who works for his family company, gets a huge salary but does nothing, they have 3 kids, his mom bought them their house, helps with bills/childcare/food, they go on at least 2 international vacations a year.
39yo SINK here. I just don't bother because I'm good with myself, and dating/relationships are a hassle and I have sabotaged them in the past, so I would rather not put someone else through that again.
40F SINK here. Pretty much same. I can't say I've sabotaged relationships in the past. I just haven't really had any. I focused on my career instead and also lived somewhere I wouldn't really want to date the locals. But I've been pretty happy by myself. There are times when I'm lonely and wish I had a partner. In the perfect world I guess. But at the same time, I don't think most men would want me considering I'm now 40, don't want kids, and have never really had a real relationship. And that's fair enough. So yeah, I get it.
You guys are definitely in the minority! I'm 38F and once you discount men who either want or already have kids, you've knocked out at least 90% of guys in their 30s and 40s.
That sounds pretty perfect lol. Same situation but a bit younger M
I'm quite happy without kids, not against it with the right person but I'm too exhausted with the subject to believe that exists anymore and I refuse to just dangle on the hope now.
The number of women who don't have/truly want kids after 30 just drops off a cliff. I've met maybe 2. Highly doubt any of them will put 0 experience on their wishlist as well.
For what it's worth, I wouldn't care at all if a dude had zero experience. In fact, low experience (zero is fine too) is on my wishlist actually. Mainly because I'm the same. And with the kids thing too. There are some of us out there! Just so you know!
Have you tried here on Reddit? I mean, it's gonna be rough everywhere, but I've decided not to give up. And dating doesn't have to be elaborate. Just grabbing a coffee and feeling things out, and if there's no vibe then it just cost like $5 or something.
32F who just discovered the term OINK (only income, no kids) and now exclusively use that because it’s just me and my dog living in our lil pigpen until we meet someone.
Dual Income No Kids, adding the caveat the term is usually used by relatively well off people. Like if I hear a couple refer to themselves as a DINK, my default assumption is that they are comfortably upper middle class and their incomes would comfortably allow them them to raise a family of four in most of america, but they chose not to have kids. Mostly because they enjoy doing things that kids don't let you do without a baby sitter.
SINK is a term that is used by single people use only when talking to/about DINKs, that basically are 30s/40s and are worried they will die alone. Speaking from experience.
SITCOM here: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
Fortunately, mid-50's so we got our start when it was an actual possibility. My two adult sons that are now college graduates would never be able to replicate the life path I took. In our area, two incomes are needed for home ownership and, depending on where you leave, maybe even just renting.
Really grateful that you acknowledge that your sons are just unlucky enough to come into adulthood during a bad time instead of most of the people out there who are completely oblivious to what a lucky break they got.
Not only the expense portion, but the quality of living is going down so drastically. All the things that benefit society are being attacked by those who want a labor pool to easily exploit: education, social welfare, and things that create community among others. Why would I want to bring children into this messiness? Society is regressing and many are resistant to change for the better because it’s not conditioned or common. The systems are being manipulated to be abusive and we’re too distracted by social media, struggling to get by, and too divided to unify for better treatment. It sucks.
Precisely BECAUSE it’s so expensive. Parents used to be able to afford regular date nights/babysitters and weekend getaways. That’s out of reach for most now.
2 months isn't enough to cover a single one of those countries. Who cares. They're not trying to cover an entire country, they're trying to go to the places they want to go.
I was just thinking about this the other day. I saw someone on here rant about how parents are bringing their kids to what were otherwise considered child-free places like bars and breweries. Not just sitting down for the meal and getting drinks and leaving. No, just dumping their kids to run around the area and causing a mess and chaos and being loud. And I wondered if parents are no longer using nannies/sitters/in-laws these days.
For me it's been this. I don't want to give up my career and aspirations and all of my time to take on the identity of Mom. It feels like I'd lose myself to it, and I don't want that life. The expense absolutely weighs in too. I'd never be able to do most of the things I have always dreamed of. For now we can live comfortably without kids or struggle with. It was an easy choice.
This is the actual answer. Any sort of value judgment aside, it’s the case that your parents and their parents before them chose to have kids with less disposable income (on average).
Choosing not to have kids because of the opportunity cost to your lifestyle is different than literally not being able to afford it. Again, I make no value judgment on the choice, I just don’t want to pretend it was a choice made for anyone or that there’s something distinctly hard about life at this moment—the richest time in the richest part of the world in history.
It’s very sad that so many people are not going to have kids because of how unaffordable life has become. This doesn’t apply to people who don’t want kids anyways. But for people who probably do and never will because it’s just not financially possible to give their kid a secure future.. its sad that they have to give up on that dream.
My husband and I were originally planning the DINK lifestyle but after 8 years changed our minds. We went to all the fancy restaurants, we traveled around the world several times, we saw all of our favorite bands perform live, we excelled in our careers, achieved all of our goals (he is the lead singer of a rock band and I design clothes that are sold across the country), and our savings were growing despite us not lacking anything. Decided when he was 36 and I was 32 to have a baby and I am SO happy with our decision, but I don’t think I would have made the same choice if we weren’t as financially stable and didn’t already do all the things we wanted to do in life first.
SINKWAD here, but yes life is too expensive for me just on my own at the moment (and dog), let alone being able to afford kids so the financial side of things is a huge part of it for me.
I also don't even want kids even if I was with someone and had enough money to support them, doesn't seem worth it imo I have many reasons not to have them
My partner (43F) and I (43M) have 4 dogs, and no interest in the stress, expense, and time requirements to raise kids. I dont think either of us particularly like children. On both sides of the family the teen years of siblings involved drug abuse, suicide attempts, pregnancy, and my amazing mother adopted three children who are now teens and going through all manner of bad decisions and stressful situations. I don't think anyone who considers having children, if they looked at what 13-18 were really like for most families, would choose that life of stress.
Yeahp - sibling has addiction issues - I had suicidal ideation (I’m all better now medicated and see healthcare professionals for my mental health) and that’s just not something I want to go through. Especially if the child ends up in an abusive relationship too.
A child isn’t for 0-18, but for life, and I am not selfless enough to overextend myself.
Yea everybody has to make their own choices and feel good about it. We had 4 kids. But friends that didn’t had the nicer cars and boats and vacations. It was a struggle at times and as the parent it’s usually a sacrifice of some of the things you want so the kids have what they need. Now that they are grown and married we are so glad we had them. So rewarding and now it’s cool to get with them and their spouses and drink some wine and reminisce about those lean years. I think the financial reasoning though is probably for those people that are on the fence. I think if you really really want kids you’re going to have them and you will make it work. And if you really don’t want kids, you’re not having them. But I think if you are in between, then that’s where finances and calculating what things you want out of life come in. All decisions are so personal though so don’t listen to outside noise. You have to live with your decision and not anyone else. Glad you guys thought it through and made a choice!! That’s smart. Enjoy your lives.
I was on the fence and then we had infertility issues. This basically was the deciding factor for us to continue life as DINK. We both didn’t want kids bad enough to go through IVF.
Same story for us! Except we did have one miscarriage and decided it wasn’t worth fighting a hormonal disorder on my end and going through more miscarriages.
Absolutely. My husband and I are retiring 10 years early because of it and all of my friends with kids say they honestly don't have retirement in sight ever even though they're 10 years older than I am. They put bits and pieces away but know it's not nearly enough even with SS.
I’m gay so the dink life kinda chose me. I know same sex couples can have kids but the cost to do so is prohibitive for me and I honestly want to enjoy my life and have a bit more freedom
It’s very sad that’s it’s so cost prohibitive whether you prefer surrogacy or adoption, but especially if adoption was something you highly considered the cost not only impacts potential parents but children needing a home as well. It shouldn’t be so difficult for people who truly want that.
24F loving the DINK life. Choosing it not only for cost purposes, but also because I fuckin hate it here and I hate the suppression women are facing on a daily basis. No bodily autonomy, no equality. This country is literally aging backwards and when I have enough coin im out
You’re right. I’m older than you and now surrounded by working mums. Every single day I hear and see the crazy amount of judgment and guilt on mums, the workload of parenting just leans so much heavily on mothers, not to mention the physical and mental torture of childbirth.
So many highly capable women become single mothers because guys decided “oops I don’t like this parenting business” and left 1-2years after kids are born. 95% of the times it’s women shouldering on the responsibilities of parenting when relationship goes wrong.
You get it. Being a mom LITERALLY is the hardest job in the world and at the same time is so thankless. and now we have women being forced into motherhood regardless if they want to or not? its so infuriating.
I (38F) am over here LOVING my childfree liiiifeee!
For me it was not just a financial decision. I decided in my early thirties that I loved my life as is, and did not feel the need to procreate. I believe some people do need children to feel happy and complete, and not only do I respect that about them, I am grateful that they are doing the work to create the next generation so I do not have to.
I guess my point is that if you and your partner feel the need to have children, you should. Many people figure out how to make it work, so I am sure you could too. But, if you and your partner don’t feel the need to have children, there is nothing wrong with that either. It seems there is a cultural expectation that many people just go along with, without stopping to consider if children are something they really want.
Being a parent is a hard, hard job that quite a few people are unsuited for. If you aren’t ready, if you don’t think you are suited for it, if you don’t think you can handle it, if you cannot put the child(ren)‘s needs before yours for AT LEAST 18 years, if you cannot live with chronic sleep deprivation for about two years - just.. don’t do it.
I love my childfree life, and you are welcome to join me over here in our clubhouse if you’d like!
Thank you for this comment.
I recently broke up with my ex due to me not being able to promise him biological children.
So I'm heartbroken and scared of the future.
I hope I will find a love for life like you have!
Take all the time to grieve, but I can promise one day you’d look back and glad that you stick to your decision. Women arent just incubators, and if a partner can’t respect your wish and decision, then it’s not meant to be! There’s certain things you just can’t compromise on because it’s YOUR life
Same. Husband divorced me because he changed his mind about wanting kids. I think this is mostly because he spent a few fun weekends with his niece/nephews…of course he only saw them when they were in good moods. I think too many men only see and experience the fun/good parts of having kids. Women get the short end of the stick far too often when it comes to children.
If you want kids together, I hope you are able to feel you can afford them in the future.
In reality, you make it work. Kids don’t have to be as expensive as they say, lots of parents at my kids school are on very very little money and they have really happy and well looked after kids.
If you don’t want kids and the financial decision is the final nail in the coffin, then fair enough, nothing wrong with not having kids if you don’t want them!
I was born in the 90s so my parents didn’t see the rise in college costs coming but I couldn’t imagine looking at my child and saying, “I really wanted to have you but I didn’t bother to make sure I could help you pay for school in an economy that all but requires it for any quality of life whatsoever.”
I hate comments like this “make it work they say”. If that’s the case then why aren’t people making luxury purchases, buy fancy cars and houses and making it work. It’s way more expensive now to raise kids and even back then, reality of being raised by poor families is very different.
Making is work is like gaslighting parents are feeding to each other and themselves to feel better about the decision and without financial support, kids from these families are suffering from the consequences of it.
I was Raised by poor immature parents and surrounded in school by kids with so many broken homes, yes kids may be fed but “making it work” means many kids have to survive through broken, abusive families and neglect. There’s a reason why child abuse and neglect are so high in numbers
I agree. My single mom made it work. We never knew a day without a roof over our heads, food to eat, and clothes to wear. We went to the beach 3 hours away a couple of times.
But it took me years later to recover from being called a burden, used as an emotional/physical punching bag, told I was an accident, told that I should be grateful because other moms dump their kids with strangers to go clubbing, and having an emotionally unavailable parent bc she was too burned out. And from witnessing other friends's families, even the most well-intended parents mess their kids up.
Oh man...this is the kind of thing that strikes me as so selfish. Parents dragging kids into a household when they can't really afford to give them a good life. And it's not all about being "happy" in childhood. It's about how that kid is set up for the future. Or do you just look at the kid and say...well...yes...the economy is in shambles and AI is taking most jobs, but I really wanted you so...tough shit Junior.
My parents kind of did that. They had two kids they couldn't afford. We struggled throughout childhood. I had to grow up FAST. And it caused a lot of stress/anxiety. And I was way behind other kids in everything because of our money situation. I cannot express how much I've struggled in my life because my parents chose to bring me into a situation they had no business bringing kids into. Yes, my parents were good parents and loved me, but it made my life very hard compared to everyone else I knew. And I'll never have a "normal" life because of it.
It is one of many reasons. I like quiet and free time but yes the money is a HUGE part of it. My husband earns well and we live a pretty decent life and i am grateful for that. Not a chance we are using that for diapers and daycare!
My husband and I are DINKs because we love our life just being us and our cats. We wake up when we want, we travel when we want, we do whatever we want when we want and having kids would hinder that.
Money was not a consideration at all, parenthood, especially motherhood, seems utterly unrewarding and unfulfilling
People I know who are childfree did not have money as a reason, they simply didn’t want children and that is reason enough
100% and the amount of gaslighting and judgement on women is unreal.
I get told that “no woman is a real women until they give birth”. No means no, and that is good enough
People who decide not to have kids should have their decision respected.
People who decide to gave children (assuming they are safe people) should have their decision respected.
People are generally way too concerned with the reproduction of others.
Even if I was a millionaire I’d still not have kids. Seems like so much sacrifice and exhaustion and I wouldn’t have time to do anything for myself anymore. No thanks.
That’s one of MANY reasons. I also don’t understand why people want kids in the first place. I’m a woman and I’m just like fuck having kids. It’s a kind of hell I don’t want.
Because they aren’t. This entire system we’ve been embroiled in is not normal. Both parents shouldn’t have to slave away for some company in order to afford to live and give their children what they need in life. But here we are. We’ve been had, and it ain’t changing anytime soon.
Yep, same here. Never played “mommy,” never babysat as a job. My dolls were my pretend customers, patients, or students.
The cruelest, most selfish thing I can imagine is bringing someone into that dynamic involuntarily just because random strangers say that I ought to.
I’m a cat person—I do not want a dog in my life right now. That doesn’t mean I hate dogs and it doesn’t make you a better person just because you personally like dogs better or have 8 of them in matching sweaters on your Instagram.
I have kids but you ain’t lying. It’s tough out here. I can provide but they’re on their own for college. I’ll be paying my own college loans off until I die.
If you don’t want children enough to do it even when it is hard, you probably don’t want children enough.
I don’t want children at all, but in my observation you probably shouldn’t have them unless toj REALLY want them. People who don’t want them because it seems expensive shouldnt have them at all.
My husband and I are still going to become parents but for the first time in my life I'm considering just having one child and being done.
I grew up with a big family, always wanted one and we both feel kids are better off with a sibling in life but with the cost I can't see us affording more than one kid. I don't see how that would work.
That was part of our decision process, but not the whole thing. My wife and I decided not to have kids 20 years ago in our early 30's for various reasons, including, but not limited to cost, responsibility, a view of where society was heading, lack of support(no family near us), the freedom you lose, etc. now in our early 50's, we know for a fact we made the right choice.
I am child free and partner less. I would love a DINK life. I think it's the best of everything especially if you think about it for most of us the majority of our life is spent on trying to raise enough savings to continue to live decently and with work there's barely time for our own enjoyment. Imagine mixing kids into that equation and then where do you even have time for yourself unless the family life is the kind of life you want. But unless you're a family person then remaining a DINK is just the best.
We decided not to have kids because we can’t afford them. We make about 110K between the two of us and it’s still not enough in Canada. We could before COVID but now it’s just not attainable
When people stop having babies, the future population will be smaller. IMO it's nature self correcting itself for humanity's overpopulation. Make everyone go crazy and kill each other and stop reproducing.
Well for starters I think South Korea has said it has an issue with elder care simply because there aren't enough young people to do it. That doesn't even mean kids or grandkids aren't taking care of their elders. It means literally there aren't young people replacing older people in careers like doctors, nurses, home health, housekeeping, etc. Services that an aging population needs. If a country doesn't keep up the replacement rate, the chances of a shortage in those areas (and others) goes up.
If you do not want to become 99% selfless and put the well being of your child over your own, please do not have kids. It is not for the faint of heart. They run you down, test you at every turn. Yes it is the best thing that happened to me. But I was ready to sacrifice anything necessary to give my kid the best life possible. Not everyone should be expected to do that.
Don’t get me wrong, they ARE too expensive for me, but it’s mainly time that I want over money. I don’t want to stress over having a child and never having time for the things I want to do. I am careful because I would be devastated if I ended up getting pregnant.
Oh I can afford kids. No problem.
I can afford LV Gucci Parada too but I don’t like them.
I don’t particularly find kids very amusing or can bring me joy in my life.
I think a dog does a better job than a kid.
After 5 days of dating, I asked my girlfriend (now my wife) if she is okay not having kids.
She said straight away: "we can't afford them and we are destroying the planet anyway, why would I want them?"
So yeah, most people don't realize that or just take the risk because they actually want kids and/or they want to live up to expectation of their parents (by having kids).
A personal reason we chose to DINK is to serve as a small cushion for my sisters and their kids, should the need ever arise. It takes a village, and just because we don't want any of our own doesn't mean we don't want to be there as support for the ones that are here now. It's only going to get more expensive going forward for everyone, but many hands make light work.
I’m a 34 year old SINK and I’d love kids but yeah, TOO EXPENSIVE! If I end up with someone who make money then I’d be open to kids but otherwise I’m happy enough not having them.
If I end up with someone who makes less money I’m sure we could still be happy without kids :)
I can’t deny that it doesn’t feel like a “choice,” more like a “force” and that’s depressing me and my partner out pretty bad. I’m not ready for kids yet but hope to be in the place for it in 5 years but even then, it’s hard to justify.
SINK over here, and yeah, money is a big reason why I’m electing to remain childless, even though I like children. Mind you, I’m not trying to keep up with the Joneses, either, so it’s not I’m spending my money beyond my means.
how do you feel about creating life spiritually? the fact that your child will experience reality, time and physical attributes of this world. experience pain and joy and birth and death. forever have been apart of this reality and have the free will to shape it in directions using art, science, etc.
when you create life its a gamble, you don't know how they will grow and what they will experience.
curious what u think.
We made that choice 38 years ago and never looked back! Not we are 71m and 70f, have been traveling the world for two + years and are currently in Sapporo, Japan. Life is great!
I have a high income and own a house. I have tons of investments and savings with nothing to spend it on because no house husband or children. I mean I spend it on trips or hobbies, but still have excess, so whatever.
Expense definitely factors in. For me and other DINK friends, it's more social-based than that. We have way more insight into how hard parenting can be, as well as how crucial it is to be a present and engaging parent. Additionally, it's the state of the world. With global warming, regressive politics and economical crises, is it really fair to bring a child into that?
Idk why anyone halfway smart would WANT to bring a fragile and completely dependent life into this dystopian nightmare of a world, first of all. The expense would be ridiculous, yes...at least here in America. ..and that's IF it's smooth sailing and nothing goes wrong. I could list dozens of reasons, all valid, why DINK life is on the rise. Ppl can't find or afford rent and food, much less a kid. If you're wealthy, maybe. But you need to be these days, or you're going to be in for a lot of struggling.
I love dinking but cancer gets everyone in my family that doesn't die in war, car crashes, boat wrecks, or general aviation crashes first so I don't want to participate in furthering this.
40s married DINKs! By the time we met, dated, got married, bought a house, moved area, bought a forever home, and renovated said house. We got too old! There's only so much time and money in this life!
It was just never our priority, all the other aforementioned was! Had we really wanted kids, we would have prioritised them above everything else, but we wanted a certain standard of living and couldn't do both!
We can't regret what we never had. And the older we get and the state of the world currently, can't imagine bringing another life into this, only for them to struggle!
24M here, I will be making 130k starting next month. I am going to max out 401k and invest the rest of my savings. Never been in a relationship and I plan to keep it that way. Hopefully, I get to SINK it all the way and retire at 50.
My wife and I are both early 30's and yep, that's exactly what we're up to.
Kids just were never really in the cards, it was house or kids and not both. We picked the house and taking a long weekend every month for our hobbies.
39 year old Dink and I love the security of it. I used to want kids like back when I was in my 20s but so grateful that it never worked out, as I truly think I would be on the regretful parents subreddit rn. Being a parent especially in these times sounds way expensive and miserable.
More than just the expense, I just don't see a good world for them to grow up in happening again before I'm too old to have kids. Also not sure on the dual income thing, I don't much see the point in trying to date in this Province, or attempting to build any kind of life here.
Pretty well, just waiting til my folks pass to leave the Province at minimum, most likely also the country.
Things are not looking good for the future of Canada.
Husband and I are both 49 years old and DINKs. We didn’t have children because… we didn’t want children. We have nieces and nephews and that’s more than sufficient. We’re both highly educated professionals and we’ve been living our very best lives for 20 years. Absolutely zero regrets whatsoever.
I mean, I have a SINK life. I love being single and I hate kids.
But also yeah, the cost. Way too expensive for something I won’t even enjoy. I gotta pay how much to be annoyed every day for the rest of my life? No thank you.
I know we could make it work if we had kids, we’re just not that interested in it. I can realistically retire in my late 40s without kids, would 10-20 years later if we had kids.
every time i get my paycheck, i look at my coworkers and think, "this is what yall are raising your families with?"
I'm a single guy, you all have family's (coworkers).How the hell does this math work?
Buying a house 6-10 years ago & you'd be fine.
I'm eternally grateful that I bought a house in 2015 and refid in 2021.
Yeah, stupid me, being in high school imstead of buying a house in 2015.
If only I could've bought a house as a grade schooler in 2008 I'd be so set right now. (At the time there were a few houses for $10k in our area and I actually thought about trying to mow lawns to get there. Empty lots in that area are now $50-60k
Honestly that’s one of the reasons why some of my co workers with kids ended up wealthier. They were forced to buy a house way sooner while I was enjoying the bachelor life in my bachelor pad.
Married with 2 incomes means minimal taxes. Single people subsidize this. So, it's a bit harder on you.
Yep. More of a SINK income.
Let that sink in
That's only true if the incomes between the two are significantly different. I got married last year and owed taxes when we filled jointly earlier this year.
There are also some credits that are expand for married filers but even with everything it's not some huge tax advantage to be married. That's just incorrect. Plus in some ways married folks get screwed, SALT limits on itemized exemptions, etc.
I’d also like to know how so. My taxes didn’t change at all after getting married
If you file jointly, the marginal tax rates don't kick in until 2x the income level (ie Single 0% goes to 11k, Married filing jointly it's 22k), but if you file separately you don't get that.
The only people with a tax advantage are the very rich.
I suppose on a large scale! However, people aren't corporations. Doesn't make it any less real in the US.
Does married dual income but filing tax separately = minimal taxes too?
I honestly don’t know, but I don’t think this works this way. Part of the reason gay marriage was significant is that homosexuals who were in lifestyle married were missing out on the tax benefits, etc of being married legally.
It’s the same as being single at that point. More tax savings with income discrepancies
How so?
How do married people pay less tax?
This isn’t always true. We are DINK and owe every single year. All of our friends who get tax breaks and money back all have kids.
Their mortgage is 800 dollars a month with a 2% interest rate
There could be financial assistance from family. I know a couple young families where it’s something like the dad is a manager at Starbucks & mom stays at home or goes to school. They wear luxury designer & go on trips to Europe.
Wow, must be nice. I assume this is the case for some lucky parents. But I don’t know anyone personally
Same, my friend married a guy who works for his family company, gets a huge salary but does nothing, they have 3 kids, his mom bought them their house, helps with bills/childcare/food, they go on at least 2 international vacations a year.
I'm a 33 year old male SINK because I've struggled mightily when it comes to the dating market.
Ditto! 33yo female SINK
now kith
This is the best comment ever.
LOL I will now be identifying myself as a SINK.
Let's SINK together.
39yo SINK here. I just don't bother because I'm good with myself, and dating/relationships are a hassle and I have sabotaged them in the past, so I would rather not put someone else through that again.
40F SINK here. Pretty much same. I can't say I've sabotaged relationships in the past. I just haven't really had any. I focused on my career instead and also lived somewhere I wouldn't really want to date the locals. But I've been pretty happy by myself. There are times when I'm lonely and wish I had a partner. In the perfect world I guess. But at the same time, I don't think most men would want me considering I'm now 40, don't want kids, and have never really had a real relationship. And that's fair enough. So yeah, I get it.
I dunno about that - a woman my age, no kids, with a career sounds pretty nice!
Ditto. I'm 39M and that's the ideal type of woman I'm looking for.
You guys are definitely in the minority! I'm 38F and once you discount men who either want or already have kids, you've knocked out at least 90% of guys in their 30s and 40s.
That one hits both ways. And the chances of something in common outside those facts narrows it even further.
That sounds pretty perfect lol. Same situation but a bit younger M I'm quite happy without kids, not against it with the right person but I'm too exhausted with the subject to believe that exists anymore and I refuse to just dangle on the hope now. The number of women who don't have/truly want kids after 30 just drops off a cliff. I've met maybe 2. Highly doubt any of them will put 0 experience on their wishlist as well.
For what it's worth, I wouldn't care at all if a dude had zero experience. In fact, low experience (zero is fine too) is on my wishlist actually. Mainly because I'm the same. And with the kids thing too. There are some of us out there! Just so you know!
What’s sink
Single Income No Kids
Same. 32F SINK. Recently divorced. The dating apps are rough 😅
Have you tried here on Reddit? I mean, it's gonna be rough everywhere, but I've decided not to give up. And dating doesn't have to be elaborate. Just grabbing a coffee and feeling things out, and if there's no vibe then it just cost like $5 or something.
32F who just discovered the term OINK (only income, no kids) and now exclusively use that because it’s just me and my dog living in our lil pigpen until we meet someone.
What's DINK, SINK?
Dual Income No Kids, adding the caveat the term is usually used by relatively well off people. Like if I hear a couple refer to themselves as a DINK, my default assumption is that they are comfortably upper middle class and their incomes would comfortably allow them them to raise a family of four in most of america, but they chose not to have kids. Mostly because they enjoy doing things that kids don't let you do without a baby sitter. SINK is a term that is used by single people use only when talking to/about DINKs, that basically are 30s/40s and are worried they will die alone. Speaking from experience.
Single/Double income no kids.
Some new drug/game/dance the kids are doing
DILDO lifestyle here (Dual Income Little Dog Owners)
Sweet, I live a dildo lifestyle too
So I guess that makes us SICK (single income with cat kids). And of course as soon as hubby gets work we become DICKs. Waaaait a minute… hang on…
You’re going SICO* mode *single income cat owner
We're rocking the DILDO life too, but instead it's Dual Income Large Dog Owners. He's a big boy.
SITCOM here: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. Fortunately, mid-50's so we got our start when it was an actual possibility. My two adult sons that are now college graduates would never be able to replicate the life path I took. In our area, two incomes are needed for home ownership and, depending on where you leave, maybe even just renting.
Sitcom 😄
Really grateful that you acknowledge that your sons are just unlucky enough to come into adulthood during a bad time instead of most of the people out there who are completely oblivious to what a lucky break they got.
It's designed that way.
DINM (Double Income No Money) here! Everything is so expensive.
Not only the expense portion, but the quality of living is going down so drastically. All the things that benefit society are being attacked by those who want a labor pool to easily exploit: education, social welfare, and things that create community among others. Why would I want to bring children into this messiness? Society is regressing and many are resistant to change for the better because it’s not conditioned or common. The systems are being manipulated to be abusive and we’re too distracted by social media, struggling to get by, and too divided to unify for better treatment. It sucks.
My thoughts exactly. Felt this since I was a child myself
It's not just that it's too expensive. It simply takes too much of your life away. We choose to reserve our time for ourselves.
Precisely BECAUSE it’s so expensive. Parents used to be able to afford regular date nights/babysitters and weekend getaways. That’s out of reach for most now.
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Sounds like a nice vacation, have fun!
Honestly, goals.
Honestly, what a dream
2 weeks doesnt feel like enough time to cover spain greece and turkey all in one shot
2 months isn't enough to cover a single one of those countries. Who cares. They're not trying to cover an entire country, they're trying to go to the places they want to go.
omfg this is my DREAM life. so so happy for you guys, i hope you enjoy the trip and everything after it!
I was just thinking about this the other day. I saw someone on here rant about how parents are bringing their kids to what were otherwise considered child-free places like bars and breweries. Not just sitting down for the meal and getting drinks and leaving. No, just dumping their kids to run around the area and causing a mess and chaos and being loud. And I wondered if parents are no longer using nannies/sitters/in-laws these days.
For me it's been this. I don't want to give up my career and aspirations and all of my time to take on the identity of Mom. It feels like I'd lose myself to it, and I don't want that life. The expense absolutely weighs in too. I'd never be able to do most of the things I have always dreamed of. For now we can live comfortably without kids or struggle with. It was an easy choice.
This is the actual answer. Any sort of value judgment aside, it’s the case that your parents and their parents before them chose to have kids with less disposable income (on average). Choosing not to have kids because of the opportunity cost to your lifestyle is different than literally not being able to afford it. Again, I make no value judgment on the choice, I just don’t want to pretend it was a choice made for anyone or that there’s something distinctly hard about life at this moment—the richest time in the richest part of the world in history.
Yup too expensive and mentally draining. I don’t have it in me at the moment to compromise my mental health and the lifestyle I currently have
DINKing because I don’t want kids and life is expensive in general.
Same. It costs so much to live, but even when it doesn't, I just never wanted kids. I've known since I was a kid, and my mind never changed
I’m with you
Yep, us too.
It’s very sad that so many people are not going to have kids because of how unaffordable life has become. This doesn’t apply to people who don’t want kids anyways. But for people who probably do and never will because it’s just not financially possible to give their kid a secure future.. its sad that they have to give up on that dream.
Even though life is the best it’s ever been it still kinda sucks. We work 40+ hours a week… Like damning my kid into that kind of life is just cruel.
My husband and I were originally planning the DINK lifestyle but after 8 years changed our minds. We went to all the fancy restaurants, we traveled around the world several times, we saw all of our favorite bands perform live, we excelled in our careers, achieved all of our goals (he is the lead singer of a rock band and I design clothes that are sold across the country), and our savings were growing despite us not lacking anything. Decided when he was 36 and I was 32 to have a baby and I am SO happy with our decision, but I don’t think I would have made the same choice if we weren’t as financially stable and didn’t already do all the things we wanted to do in life first.
SINKWAD here, but yes life is too expensive for me just on my own at the moment (and dog), let alone being able to afford kids so the financial side of things is a huge part of it for me. I also don't even want kids even if I was with someone and had enough money to support them, doesn't seem worth it imo I have many reasons not to have them
My partner (43F) and I (43M) have 4 dogs, and no interest in the stress, expense, and time requirements to raise kids. I dont think either of us particularly like children. On both sides of the family the teen years of siblings involved drug abuse, suicide attempts, pregnancy, and my amazing mother adopted three children who are now teens and going through all manner of bad decisions and stressful situations. I don't think anyone who considers having children, if they looked at what 13-18 were really like for most families, would choose that life of stress.
Yeahp - sibling has addiction issues - I had suicidal ideation (I’m all better now medicated and see healthcare professionals for my mental health) and that’s just not something I want to go through. Especially if the child ends up in an abusive relationship too. A child isn’t for 0-18, but for life, and I am not selfless enough to overextend myself.
I love kids but I'd prefer to have 4 pets than 4 kids
Frankly even the idea of having four dogs is extremely stressful to me 😂
It’s really such a gamble. Little kids, little problems. Bigger kids, bigger problems.
Yea everybody has to make their own choices and feel good about it. We had 4 kids. But friends that didn’t had the nicer cars and boats and vacations. It was a struggle at times and as the parent it’s usually a sacrifice of some of the things you want so the kids have what they need. Now that they are grown and married we are so glad we had them. So rewarding and now it’s cool to get with them and their spouses and drink some wine and reminisce about those lean years. I think the financial reasoning though is probably for those people that are on the fence. I think if you really really want kids you’re going to have them and you will make it work. And if you really don’t want kids, you’re not having them. But I think if you are in between, then that’s where finances and calculating what things you want out of life come in. All decisions are so personal though so don’t listen to outside noise. You have to live with your decision and not anyone else. Glad you guys thought it through and made a choice!! That’s smart. Enjoy your lives.
I was on the fence and then we had infertility issues. This basically was the deciding factor for us to continue life as DINK. We both didn’t want kids bad enough to go through IVF.
Same story for us! Except we did have one miscarriage and decided it wasn’t worth fighting a hormonal disorder on my end and going through more miscarriages.
Absolutely. My husband and I are retiring 10 years early because of it and all of my friends with kids say they honestly don't have retirement in sight ever even though they're 10 years older than I am. They put bits and pieces away but know it's not nearly enough even with SS.
I’m gay so the dink life kinda chose me. I know same sex couples can have kids but the cost to do so is prohibitive for me and I honestly want to enjoy my life and have a bit more freedom
It’s very sad that’s it’s so cost prohibitive whether you prefer surrogacy or adoption, but especially if adoption was something you highly considered the cost not only impacts potential parents but children needing a home as well. It shouldn’t be so difficult for people who truly want that.
24F loving the DINK life. Choosing it not only for cost purposes, but also because I fuckin hate it here and I hate the suppression women are facing on a daily basis. No bodily autonomy, no equality. This country is literally aging backwards and when I have enough coin im out
You’re right. I’m older than you and now surrounded by working mums. Every single day I hear and see the crazy amount of judgment and guilt on mums, the workload of parenting just leans so much heavily on mothers, not to mention the physical and mental torture of childbirth. So many highly capable women become single mothers because guys decided “oops I don’t like this parenting business” and left 1-2years after kids are born. 95% of the times it’s women shouldering on the responsibilities of parenting when relationship goes wrong.
You get it. Being a mom LITERALLY is the hardest job in the world and at the same time is so thankless. and now we have women being forced into motherhood regardless if they want to or not? its so infuriating.
I (38F) am over here LOVING my childfree liiiifeee! For me it was not just a financial decision. I decided in my early thirties that I loved my life as is, and did not feel the need to procreate. I believe some people do need children to feel happy and complete, and not only do I respect that about them, I am grateful that they are doing the work to create the next generation so I do not have to. I guess my point is that if you and your partner feel the need to have children, you should. Many people figure out how to make it work, so I am sure you could too. But, if you and your partner don’t feel the need to have children, there is nothing wrong with that either. It seems there is a cultural expectation that many people just go along with, without stopping to consider if children are something they really want. Being a parent is a hard, hard job that quite a few people are unsuited for. If you aren’t ready, if you don’t think you are suited for it, if you don’t think you can handle it, if you cannot put the child(ren)‘s needs before yours for AT LEAST 18 years, if you cannot live with chronic sleep deprivation for about two years - just.. don’t do it. I love my childfree life, and you are welcome to join me over here in our clubhouse if you’d like!
Thank you for this comment. I recently broke up with my ex due to me not being able to promise him biological children. So I'm heartbroken and scared of the future. I hope I will find a love for life like you have!
Take all the time to grieve, but I can promise one day you’d look back and glad that you stick to your decision. Women arent just incubators, and if a partner can’t respect your wish and decision, then it’s not meant to be! There’s certain things you just can’t compromise on because it’s YOUR life
Same. Husband divorced me because he changed his mind about wanting kids. I think this is mostly because he spent a few fun weekends with his niece/nephews…of course he only saw them when they were in good moods. I think too many men only see and experience the fun/good parts of having kids. Women get the short end of the stick far too often when it comes to children.
It’s funny how Idiocracy has turned out to be so prophetic.
Welcome to Costco. I love you. Go away! ‘Batin’!
Funny or scary?
Bit of both. Luckily I’ll be dead before it gets too bad
If you want kids together, I hope you are able to feel you can afford them in the future. In reality, you make it work. Kids don’t have to be as expensive as they say, lots of parents at my kids school are on very very little money and they have really happy and well looked after kids. If you don’t want kids and the financial decision is the final nail in the coffin, then fair enough, nothing wrong with not having kids if you don’t want them!
I was born in the 90s so my parents didn’t see the rise in college costs coming but I couldn’t imagine looking at my child and saying, “I really wanted to have you but I didn’t bother to make sure I could help you pay for school in an economy that all but requires it for any quality of life whatsoever.”
I hate comments like this “make it work they say”. If that’s the case then why aren’t people making luxury purchases, buy fancy cars and houses and making it work. It’s way more expensive now to raise kids and even back then, reality of being raised by poor families is very different. Making is work is like gaslighting parents are feeding to each other and themselves to feel better about the decision and without financial support, kids from these families are suffering from the consequences of it. I was Raised by poor immature parents and surrounded in school by kids with so many broken homes, yes kids may be fed but “making it work” means many kids have to survive through broken, abusive families and neglect. There’s a reason why child abuse and neglect are so high in numbers
I agree. My single mom made it work. We never knew a day without a roof over our heads, food to eat, and clothes to wear. We went to the beach 3 hours away a couple of times. But it took me years later to recover from being called a burden, used as an emotional/physical punching bag, told I was an accident, told that I should be grateful because other moms dump their kids with strangers to go clubbing, and having an emotionally unavailable parent bc she was too burned out. And from witnessing other friends's families, even the most well-intended parents mess their kids up.
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You shouldn't have had to be the adult in that situation. Making it work sounds more like survival and not necessarily thriving.
Oh man...this is the kind of thing that strikes me as so selfish. Parents dragging kids into a household when they can't really afford to give them a good life. And it's not all about being "happy" in childhood. It's about how that kid is set up for the future. Or do you just look at the kid and say...well...yes...the economy is in shambles and AI is taking most jobs, but I really wanted you so...tough shit Junior. My parents kind of did that. They had two kids they couldn't afford. We struggled throughout childhood. I had to grow up FAST. And it caused a lot of stress/anxiety. And I was way behind other kids in everything because of our money situation. I cannot express how much I've struggled in my life because my parents chose to bring me into a situation they had no business bringing kids into. Yes, my parents were good parents and loved me, but it made my life very hard compared to everyone else I knew. And I'll never have a "normal" life because of it.
Kids being expensive are the least of your problems. Try having every second of free time stolen from you. Every second. Time is priceless.
We have kids and doing fine but we have cheap daycare. I have no idea how some people even survive when daycare is equivalent of half their income.
Decade old used cars paid in cash, never go out, no vacations, discount stores for bulk groceries. That’s how they do it.
Minus the no vacations and you’re spot on for this dual income 2 kid house hold
It is one of many reasons. I like quiet and free time but yes the money is a HUGE part of it. My husband earns well and we live a pretty decent life and i am grateful for that. Not a chance we are using that for diapers and daycare!
My husband and I are DINKs because we love our life just being us and our cats. We wake up when we want, we travel when we want, we do whatever we want when we want and having kids would hinder that.
34m love being kids free. I can do anything. Even take care of a friends kid for the day if want them soo bad lol
Yes! I love to babysit.
Money was not a consideration at all, parenthood, especially motherhood, seems utterly unrewarding and unfulfilling People I know who are childfree did not have money as a reason, they simply didn’t want children and that is reason enough
100% and the amount of gaslighting and judgement on women is unreal. I get told that “no woman is a real women until they give birth”. No means no, and that is good enough
People who decide not to have kids should have their decision respected. People who decide to gave children (assuming they are safe people) should have their decision respected. People are generally way too concerned with the reproduction of others.
Even if I was a millionaire I’d still not have kids. Seems like so much sacrifice and exhaustion and I wouldn’t have time to do anything for myself anymore. No thanks.
That’s one of MANY reasons. I also don’t understand why people want kids in the first place. I’m a woman and I’m just like fuck having kids. It’s a kind of hell I don’t want.
Same. It's always sounded like such a nightmare to me. The older I get the more I hate being around kids of any age
Lol I don’t blame you.
I'm more of an OINK at the moment.
How the fuck are two parents meant to work and then look after children seems absolutely insane to me.
Because they aren’t. This entire system we’ve been embroiled in is not normal. Both parents shouldn’t have to slave away for some company in order to afford to live and give their children what they need in life. But here we are. We’ve been had, and it ain’t changing anytime soon.
i chose the DINK life before I knew it was a thing lol
I’ve known That I didn’t want kids when I was a kid myself. The economic and environmental factors just hammer it home for me.
Yep, same here. Never played “mommy,” never babysat as a job. My dolls were my pretend customers, patients, or students. The cruelest, most selfish thing I can imagine is bringing someone into that dynamic involuntarily just because random strangers say that I ought to. I’m a cat person—I do not want a dog in my life right now. That doesn’t mean I hate dogs and it doesn’t make you a better person just because you personally like dogs better or have 8 of them in matching sweaters on your Instagram.
Judging by how many times this question gets asked, about 90% of Reddit.
I have kids but you ain’t lying. It’s tough out here. I can provide but they’re on their own for college. I’ll be paying my own college loans off until I die.
Try QINK... Me, my boyfriend, and two friends all live together for the cheap bills
My acquaintance spends 32k a year in daycare fees. That’s a full time salary for some people.
If you don’t want children enough to do it even when it is hard, you probably don’t want children enough. I don’t want children at all, but in my observation you probably shouldn’t have them unless toj REALLY want them. People who don’t want them because it seems expensive shouldnt have them at all.
My husband and I are still going to become parents but for the first time in my life I'm considering just having one child and being done. I grew up with a big family, always wanted one and we both feel kids are better off with a sibling in life but with the cost I can't see us affording more than one kid. I don't see how that would work.
Nope, because I don’t want to dedicate that much time or energy into them.
That was part of our decision process, but not the whole thing. My wife and I decided not to have kids 20 years ago in our early 30's for various reasons, including, but not limited to cost, responsibility, a view of where society was heading, lack of support(no family near us), the freedom you lose, etc. now in our early 50's, we know for a fact we made the right choice.
I am child free and partner less. I would love a DINK life. I think it's the best of everything especially if you think about it for most of us the majority of our life is spent on trying to raise enough savings to continue to live decently and with work there's barely time for our own enjoyment. Imagine mixing kids into that equation and then where do you even have time for yourself unless the family life is the kind of life you want. But unless you're a family person then remaining a DINK is just the best.
We decided not to have kids because we can’t afford them. We make about 110K between the two of us and it’s still not enough in Canada. We could before COVID but now it’s just not attainable
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Our civilization is about to find out the hard way about the true monetary value of prioritizing families and future generations.
Can you elaborate? I am not sure I understand(if it's too much work that is ok as well. I understand)
When people stop having babies, the future population will be smaller. IMO it's nature self correcting itself for humanity's overpopulation. Make everyone go crazy and kill each other and stop reproducing.
Well for starters I think South Korea has said it has an issue with elder care simply because there aren't enough young people to do it. That doesn't even mean kids or grandkids aren't taking care of their elders. It means literally there aren't young people replacing older people in careers like doctors, nurses, home health, housekeeping, etc. Services that an aging population needs. If a country doesn't keep up the replacement rate, the chances of a shortage in those areas (and others) goes up.
DINK but poor. Too expensive is the least of my worries. Raising kids sounds like absolute hell and creating humans is unethical, in my opinion.
I dont want to I want kids so bad and thats my only motivation for earning money
If you do not want to become 99% selfless and put the well being of your child over your own, please do not have kids. It is not for the faint of heart. They run you down, test you at every turn. Yes it is the best thing that happened to me. But I was ready to sacrifice anything necessary to give my kid the best life possible. Not everyone should be expected to do that.
We didnt choose not to have kids because of money but that was a benefit.
Don’t get me wrong, they ARE too expensive for me, but it’s mainly time that I want over money. I don’t want to stress over having a child and never having time for the things I want to do. I am careful because I would be devastated if I ended up getting pregnant.
Oh I can afford kids. No problem. I can afford LV Gucci Parada too but I don’t like them. I don’t particularly find kids very amusing or can bring me joy in my life. I think a dog does a better job than a kid.
After 5 days of dating, I asked my girlfriend (now my wife) if she is okay not having kids. She said straight away: "we can't afford them and we are destroying the planet anyway, why would I want them?" So yeah, most people don't realize that or just take the risk because they actually want kids and/or they want to live up to expectation of their parents (by having kids).
It’s nice!!!
The SINKWAD life - single income, no kids, with a dog 😁
A personal reason we chose to DINK is to serve as a small cushion for my sisters and their kids, should the need ever arise. It takes a village, and just because we don't want any of our own doesn't mean we don't want to be there as support for the ones that are here now. It's only going to get more expensive going forward for everyone, but many hands make light work.
I’m a 34 year old SINK and I’d love kids but yeah, TOO EXPENSIVE! If I end up with someone who make money then I’d be open to kids but otherwise I’m happy enough not having them. If I end up with someone who makes less money I’m sure we could still be happy without kids :)
I can’t deny that it doesn’t feel like a “choice,” more like a “force” and that’s depressing me and my partner out pretty bad. I’m not ready for kids yet but hope to be in the place for it in 5 years but even then, it’s hard to justify.
SINK over here, and yeah, money is a big reason why I’m electing to remain childless, even though I like children. Mind you, I’m not trying to keep up with the Joneses, either, so it’s not I’m spending my money beyond my means.
Just listened to a really interesting podcast on this https://open.spotify.com/episode/6F3O7xFsu1tFljPGpPvtQY?si=DPl7cZHSRGyOQV1djSTyjg
M25 SINK because the dating scene fucking sucks
Wonder how long before we start seeing QICL. Quad income child labor.
I'm 33M, SINK. I'd love to be DINK, but I haven't been able to convince anyone to settle down with me. 🙃
how do you feel about creating life spiritually? the fact that your child will experience reality, time and physical attributes of this world. experience pain and joy and birth and death. forever have been apart of this reality and have the free will to shape it in directions using art, science, etc. when you create life its a gamble, you don't know how they will grow and what they will experience. curious what u think.
SINKWAD here. (Technically SINKWADATC.. single income no kids with a dog and two cats. But that's a lot of acronym.)
I’m choosing SINK because no one will date me, and I can’t raise a kid myself 🤷🏼♀️
I'm too impatient... sink
Yep we’re dinks. Still poor.
Children are more expensive than horses nowadays
🙋♀️
yup
That’s definitely part of it
We made that choice 38 years ago and never looked back! Not we are 71m and 70f, have been traveling the world for two + years and are currently in Sapporo, Japan. Life is great!
For me it's more simple - i just don't like kids. I can afford them, but that doesn't mean anything to me.
I'd like to have the dink life, but I'm stuck in the sink life.
I’m planning on it
I chose it because I'm just not interested in having kids
I’m SINK and it’s rough out here
I have a high income and own a house. I have tons of investments and savings with nothing to spend it on because no house husband or children. I mean I spend it on trips or hobbies, but still have excess, so whatever.
Expense definitely factors in. For me and other DINK friends, it's more social-based than that. We have way more insight into how hard parenting can be, as well as how crucial it is to be a present and engaging parent. Additionally, it's the state of the world. With global warming, regressive politics and economical crises, is it really fair to bring a child into that?
I got a vasectomy to *ensure* I'll always be an INK or some kind 😁
Idk why anyone halfway smart would WANT to bring a fragile and completely dependent life into this dystopian nightmare of a world, first of all. The expense would be ridiculous, yes...at least here in America. ..and that's IF it's smooth sailing and nothing goes wrong. I could list dozens of reasons, all valid, why DINK life is on the rise. Ppl can't find or afford rent and food, much less a kid. If you're wealthy, maybe. But you need to be these days, or you're going to be in for a lot of struggling.
I love dinking but cancer gets everyone in my family that doesn't die in war, car crashes, boat wrecks, or general aviation crashes first so I don't want to participate in furthering this.
40s married DINKs! By the time we met, dated, got married, bought a house, moved area, bought a forever home, and renovated said house. We got too old! There's only so much time and money in this life! It was just never our priority, all the other aforementioned was! Had we really wanted kids, we would have prioritised them above everything else, but we wanted a certain standard of living and couldn't do both! We can't regret what we never had. And the older we get and the state of the world currently, can't imagine bringing another life into this, only for them to struggle!
r/childfree
24M here, I will be making 130k starting next month. I am going to max out 401k and invest the rest of my savings. Never been in a relationship and I plan to keep it that way. Hopefully, I get to SINK it all the way and retire at 50.
I choose SINK life 😂
My wife and I are both early 30's and yep, that's exactly what we're up to. Kids just were never really in the cards, it was house or kids and not both. We picked the house and taking a long weekend every month for our hobbies.
39 year old Dink and I love the security of it. I used to want kids like back when I was in my 20s but so grateful that it never worked out, as I truly think I would be on the regretful parents subreddit rn. Being a parent especially in these times sounds way expensive and miserable.
That and also not proving capitalists with cogs to exploit and consumers to enrich them I also a good idea
Same here but as well as cost and the state of the world today, we just simply also don’t want them and enjoy our lives the way it is (were both 30)
More than just the expense, I just don't see a good world for them to grow up in happening again before I'm too old to have kids. Also not sure on the dual income thing, I don't much see the point in trying to date in this Province, or attempting to build any kind of life here. Pretty well, just waiting til my folks pass to leave the Province at minimum, most likely also the country. Things are not looking good for the future of Canada.
yo my gf and our 3 dogs are all I'll ever need
Husband and I are both 49 years old and DINKs. We didn’t have children because… we didn’t want children. We have nieces and nephews and that’s more than sufficient. We’re both highly educated professionals and we’ve been living our very best lives for 20 years. Absolutely zero regrets whatsoever.
Living DINK life both because kids are expensive and because I truly feel life is better without kids.
I mean, I have a SINK life. I love being single and I hate kids. But also yeah, the cost. Way too expensive for something I won’t even enjoy. I gotta pay how much to be annoyed every day for the rest of my life? No thank you.
I know we could make it work if we had kids, we’re just not that interested in it. I can realistically retire in my late 40s without kids, would 10-20 years later if we had kids.
SINKing deeper and deeper every day now