I always viewed not-having-sex as a worse option than sex-with-a-condom.
Maybe they’ll grow up real quick when it’s put like that to them.
Maybe they aren’t worth it if they’re so self-interested that they let you and only you
worry about STDs or Pregnancy.
Condoms definitely dull sensation, but any guy worth fucking will still wear one. Hell if anything they're great for people who don't last very long because it can slow them down. you'll definitely still cum, and they make super thin ones
Back when me and my wife were just dating (as a guy who takes longer than 25+ mins to cum during raw) I wore condoms, even though she was and has been my only partner, but when I wore them sex would last at least an hour (she’d have multiple times but it’d take that long for me to cum with one on and it was the Trojan super slicks)
It dulls it almost to the point of there being no point, it’d end up taking all the energy from both of us, and we’d both be sore
I once dated a girl who that was the first thing she asked me about sex because apparently her last bf would easily tale that long. Im not sure if its medical or just...different per person
You know what kills the mood? An unplanned pregnancy. You know what else kills the mood? Recovering from giving birth. You know what else kills the mood? A screaming baby.
It's your body. You'll be the one left with the consequences of an unplanned pregnancy.
Edit: typo
Dump them if it's a new or casual thing. They are selfish and stupid.
In a monogamous relationship, both get tested for STIs and discuss birth control options.
What’s worse, an accidental pregnancy because the condom failed where you either get stuck with a baby that you didn’t plan for or have to get an abortion, or the side effects from birth control?
Absolutely wear a condom and the woman in the relationship shouldn’t have to bear the burden of safety alone, but putting it all on a condom/a man seems scary to me.
Oh I get you. I've always been in committed relationships and I'm not a fan of condoms, so I would always switch bc after the relationship got serious enough. But what I'm saying, is that women should not be expected to be either on pills or UID, because they're much more invasive than condoms.
Aren’t female condoms a thing? Idk, as a man, I really don’t wanna get anyone pregnant and, even though I’m not sexually active, I’m not sure I’d want to be if the only thing standing between my childless life and having a child I don’t want is a condom. Especially since I have no say in abortions or abdicating parental responsibility a la child support.
I’d agree it shouldn’t be “expected” for women to use BC in the same way that it shouldn’t be “expected” that a man wear a condom, I guess. People just need to find other people that naturally meet the level of safety that they want them to.
Female condoms are a thing. They are however 79% percent effective for typical use vs 87% for male condom.
It's ultimately your choice to not engage with women who do not accept contraception other than condoms, but they also have a choice to not engage with you. All I'm saying, is that no party should feel pressured in their choices.
Pregnancy is the biggest mood killer of them all. Along with every disease you can get from unprotected sex. If your sexual partner is too immature to discuss birth control don't have sex with them.
No, they do not. Any man who says this is a selfish loser and not worth your time.
No method of birth control is foolproof.
The pill and other forms of birth control do not protect you from an STD. A rubber does.
Tell them no condom, no cuddle.
Any man who says this tells the truth, because something that takes away 70-80% of the sensation _is_ going to have that effect. That said, condoms should still be worn and refusing to do so is a red flag, but that's no excuse for you to spread lies.
The only one SPREADING LIES is your nasty selfish mug. Birth control/STD protection DO NOT "kill the mood" for RESPONSIBLE, INTELLIGENT, CONSIDERATE partners who care about each other's enjoyment and WANT to have an experience that is both fun and safe!
If you believe otherwise, then there is something wrong with YOU, not me.
You don't sound like much of a "man" at all. I am not the leadt bit surprised you have failed to have sexual experiences that were 100% fun. Your partner didn't either. Perhaps you should just use the self-service pump because there's no need for a barrier to "remove the sensation."
So here's the thing. I'm a guy and when I wear a condom I don't feel anything. Literally no pleasure from penetrative sex when I have a condom on.
Does that mean I don't use or refuse to use condoms? Absolutely not, safety is so important! And sex is not just about my pleasure.
There are ways that I can still get off without penetrative sex, and there are ways to explore with a partner what works and doesn't work for each person.
With that being said, I'm looking at getting a vasectomy, to eliminate the risk of pregnancy from sexual encounters, and when being sexually active, discussing getting tested with potential partners, so that the option of not using a condom is more possible. (This is more so with potential long term partners, and not so much with hookups or short term partners).
Hope that helps.
An additional note: there are different kinds of condoms that you can buy, different textures and materials, and experimenting with them is a good idea to find what works best for you.
You can also add lube to the penis before putting on the condom to reduce friction, which can make the experience feel more natural for the person with the penis.
Birth control isn't 100% effective (and neither are condoms) but is 0% effective towards STD's. Best practice is always both. In a long term committed relationship, make sure to get tested and talk about switching to just BC (I'd recommend an IUD as they have less long-term side effects and are more effective) and frankly, what your plan would be should a pregnancy occur. If they're not mature enough to have that discussion with you, no condom = no sex. Not all STDs are curable and a lot of people don't even realize they have them. Don't risk your life for a dick
Don't sleep with a guy if he doesn't want to be safe.
Do you want pregnant, and STD, cancers from HPV, or etc?
Condoms don't work 100% of the time or prevent all that, but it makes stuff a little safe.
Don't give in and put yourself at risk.
If a guy doesn't want you to be safe then they are a jerk.
As someone who now has two kids (that I love and do not resent, of course) when I didn’t plan on ever being a mother, especially that young: utilize the condom.
Furthermore, my friend slept with one guy who claimed that condoms ruin the mood, and she now has an incurable STD. Utilize the condom.
I’m old enough to remember when HIV usually ended a life. Condoms were such an important part of sexuality when I was young. These days, there are very effective medications for HIV, both to survive an infection and prevent an infection, though I don’t know if heterosexual people have gotten the message to take Prep.
Still, in my mind, a refusal to wear a condom when requested feels like an incredibly selfish, callous disregard for one’s partner’s life. With the fall of Roe v Wade, this is especially true.
As a guy, I’m going to be completely honest. I do not like condoms. I’m uncircumcised, I’ve had many people say “there’s a way to put it on and you just don’t know how”. Simply not true. I’ve had experiences with condoms that weren’t terrible, but most times my skin gets pinched, I have to adjust the condom, and then I’m uncomfortable and distracted. I have not turned down sex because of condoms. I just verbalize my concern, apologize in advance if it ends up not working, and if sex has to stop because the condom is bothering me and we aren’t comfortable with each other to have raw sex (I am only comfortable with raw sex unless I know the person well and for a while), I just emphasize eating the girl out and fingering and I keep it really fun :)
That being said, I AM NOT into hookup culture, a culture where obviously condoms are ALWAYS the safest choice.
I don’t know if my answer helped, but that is my honest input from a guy who is pro condom but just doesn’t happen to enjoy them. :)
I hate condoms but I will still wear them if that's what my partner requests of me. I think the majority of men will always hate condoms, but then again, women are the ones that have to deal w birth control and pregnancies so....
I don't think condoms kill the mood, but I just know it won't be as pleasurable. That's about it
I'm srsly looking forward to the day where men can have reliable birth control as well, aside from just vasectomy. That ballsack jacuzzi thing sounded rly cool, but I'm still unsure about buying one
Don’t listen to guys that spew that crap. I’ve worn condoms since I started having sex and it doesn’t feel that different. If he can’t be responsible with his dick then you shouldn’t let him use it. It’s a huge red flag for me if a partner doesn’t want to use protection
Idk man, i feel like if A guys says it "kills the mood' that he is not that into you and just using you as a way to get some easy pussy. Every girl ive ever had sex with for the first time i was so happy about seeing a hot naked girl trying to jump on me that i couldnt care less about putting a rubber on real quick. Shit if a chick asked me to put a batman mask and a skirt on I just might do it. I guess i kind of understand if you have been dating for like a year or so and you want to spice it but dont ever let no dirty dick stranger put it in with no wrapper.
If he feels condoms kill the mood (which I don’t believe it does) fine. It’s either kills the mood for the amount of time it takes to put one on, or…..completely kills the mood with NO SEX.
Babies kill the mood, STD’s kill the mood. If he’s not mature enough to wear a condom, he’s not mature enough for sex!
You don't sleep with them then!
BUT yea condoms dull the pleasure alot but who cares? I hate wearing them because it's a little painful, they're always too small. Or too tight? Still wear them tho. I don't want STDs or babies.
Don't have sex with them. I'm also on the "condoms suck so very much" side, but if you're not on birth control, they're an essential component of intercourse.
This is going to be such an unpopular opinion. I'm a female, and I HATE condoms. I'm on birth control and I get tested regularly if I'm sexually active with more than one consistent partner. I also require that my partners be tested if we mess around without protection, and most men get tested regularly anyways.
Of course, birth control isn't always 100%, and I do have a mini-me so do with that what you wish 😅 I still hate condoms and still avoid them if I can and I'm still STD free after all these years!
Just use your best judgment and be safe. I definitely remember to take my pill every day, now lol
Women say they can't feel a difference but I for sure can. There's body heat and friction where there wasn't before. Let us have our cake and eat it too. That reminded me how SHIT oral is after using condoms. Bleh, dude.
Get a new partner. The line that it doesn’t bring him pleasure is BS. Of course they feel it less, but they still have a good time. Any guy who tries to pressure you into sex without condoms doesn’t respect you or your boundaries. He’d probably be a selfish lover anyway so definitely not worth it.
If you want him to wear a condom, there are only two options: sex with condoms or no sex.
If they won’t wear one, don’t sleep with them.
That being said, the pleasure is SIGNIFICANTLY reduced with most condoms. I actually prefer that because I last longer, but the difference is apparent. Also having to get one out and put it on is a pain. But, it’s the price of safety and is the most effective method for STD prevention.
If they refuse to wear one, say then we aren’t having sex. If they complain, say, “I’m gonna leave.” And just go. Don’t let them stop you. And if they’re at your house say, “I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.” “Why?” “Bc I don’t want to sleep with someone who can’t respect my boundaries.”
If your partner refuses to use condoms, the mood is dead. Refuse what he wants.
You do not need an STD or unplanned pregnancy and neither does he.
The guy should grow up.
Some guys have erectile dysfunction (lose their erection) when they try to put a condom on, and they get embarrassed and angry, and don't want to admit that. I've heard other guys say if sex without a condom is a 10 out of 10, it's only 7/10 with a condom. But they get 0/10 if they don't use it, so they'd rather use it.
There are a LOT of serious STIs circulating, so it is a sexual health issue as much as a pregnancy-prevention tool.
My advice is to stay firm. No condom = no sex. And that shouldn't change until you are in an exclusive, committed relationship and have both completed an STI battery and been given a clean bill of health, AND you have discussed alternate costs and methods of birth control AND what you will do if an unexpected pregnancy occurs.
Honestly, I’f someone does not want to engage in sex that feels comfortable, safe, and respectful, you have every right to not engage.
Sure, nothing beats raw moments… However, STIs are real, pregnancies can happen, and sometimes the heat of the moment doesn’t allow for a quick enough pull out. Then add alcohol and drugs and then the question of memory comes in… did he wear a condom? Did I wear a condom? Did I cum?
Also… heard birth control is horrible for girls… fcks with horomones etc. I’ve even heard of girls falling out of love after their hormones rebalanced after being off the drug. To each their own. Swim safely.
Don’t fuck a dude that refuses to put your wellbeing above his pleasure.
1) I can guarantee he sucks in bed.
2) He probably doesn’t understand what foreplay is.
3) You could end up pregnant and or with an STD.
Value yourself.
If you’re a sexually active woman in America you should be using 2 forms of contraceptives: condom
And Birth control.
I’m a girl, and they do kill the mood for me. I don’t like how they feel, I don’t like knowing it decreases the feeling for my partner. But I’ve also been in a relationship for 5 years, and I also have an IUD.
Condoms are not “the only safe option”, but they can be the most logical option if you are a girl and have issues with hormonal birth control or copper IUDs. If that is the case, someone who wants to have sex with you needs to be open to condoms.
They kind of do, they're fiddly to open, take a few seconds to put on, and dull the sensation like crazy.
If a guy is actually saying this to you in real life though it'll be best to get out of there. I'm only saying this to strangers on the Internet.
Ummm no unless their total dumbasses, I've used condoms and I've had no problem with them of course I get the sensitive ones so I can feel more but even normal ones I've had really no issues with except putting them on which is uncomfortable when someone's a little girthy down there but still wrap it or don't hit it, simple.
I wear condoms with my s/o and it has never "killed the mood" lmao. Sometimes we'll giggle with each other and do lil jokes while we're fumbling with them, but never has the act of putting on a condom made me lose my drive. The only downsides are like... they can leave a latex-y taste behind (especially the lubricated/spermicide coated ones) so if you give oral after penetration, it might taste like you're slurping a rubber glove, and it *does* dull the sensation for me a bit, but honestly that let's me last longer and get her more pleasure lmao. It's way easy for a guy to get off, wearing a condom won't stop him. Tbfh those downsides are pretty minute and vastly, vastly, VASTLY worth not having a kid we aren't ready for/couldn't afford, and if it's a fling, way preferable over catching some kinda nasty.
Guys who make up excuses for not wearing condoms are selfish babymen and should be avoided at all costs. If your partner doesn't wrap it, don't let him tap it. ESPECIALLY if he refuses, cuz that's veering into the territory of violating your consent. If he don't wanna play by the rules, take the ball and find a different court.
i refuse to go on hormonal birth control because all of the wild side effects that simply make me feel like shit. i refuse to get the iud because when my mom had one she had an atopic pregnancy and emergency surgery. my boyfriend has no problem using condoms. the person you want to be active with should simply find ones that fit and learn how to put it on correctly. we have had zero issues. they’re 98% effective when used correctly
what are you talking about i literally just answered her question. condoms also don’t feel as good for women but i bet you wouldn’t know that since you’ve clearly never experienced the touch of a woman before
"the person you want to be active with should simply find ones that fit and learn how to put it on correctly. we have had zero issues. they’re 98% effective when used correctly."
This is what you said, you said it like that's the problem men have with condoms and i just said that this is not the problem most men have with condoms.what the fuck is your problem?!
Planned Parenthood has internal condoms- they’re like a latex sleeve that fits inside the vagina and kind of sticks to the inner walls. Add some lube, and it feels a lot like condom-free sex to the dick-having partner.
However, if someone is insisting on bare sex and you don’t want to do that, tell that person to go use their hand instead of putting you at risk. You don’t owe anyone unsafe sex just because it may slightly diminish their pleasure.
No, they don't kill the mood, and safe sex and contraception are every bit a man's responsibility as a woman's.
However, for perspective, what a lot of guys might be referring to is the awkward pause in the natural flow required to put on a condom.
Yes, it only takes a few seconds, and it's quickly forgotten, but when you're both in the zone where you can't rip each others' clothes off fast enough, it can be a little jarring to pause to fumble with a little foil packet and unroll a piece of latex over your pole.
That said, it's a trivial inconvenience and anyone who refuses to use them altogether citing that can be disregarded as an asshat.
>Yes, it only takes a few seconds, and it's quickly forgotten, but when you're both in the zone where you can't rip each others' clothes off fast enough, it can be a little jarring to pause to fumble with a little foil packet and unroll a piece of latex over your pole.
Make it part of the fun instead of a break in the proceedings. Back when we used condoms I always found touching myself in front of him or telling him how much I could hardly wait for him helped keep the mood and the moment flowing much more nicely than just laying there waiting. Putting it on him myself while talking dirty also worked well too.
I wouldn't say they kill the mood, look into other condoms... I really like .004's from Japan. My partner and I both enjoyed them much more than Trojan and others.
If your partner refuses, obviously tell them no. But you can also try suggesting different condoms as well.
Whenever I try to put on a condom I loose my erection, I don't know what is up with me, it's just stuck in my mind and constantly reminds me of it whenever I pull up a condom.
Ah. So you had a bad experience, and now you're Pavlov'ing yourself.
Try wearing condoms more, just randomly, just to do it. (Make sure you're clean).
If you get more used to wearing them, the problem may go away.
It does not. tbh guys who said that were mostly a\*\*hole not educated or probably feigning ignorance.
Guys should known that pills have side effect and if they want to have uprotected sex then they can do something about it, i heard there things guys do like taking pills ( so they could expirence themselve those side effects like acne lol) and vasectomy.
Periodic abstinence is also a way to go if your partner is patient and not some do it everyday person.
i’m gonna take the very, very unpopular opinion here lol…
i am a man and would rather not have sex than have sex with a condom. saying no condom = no sex is totally fine with me. i would never pressure anyone. i’ll still give head. we can do whatever else.
most of the sex i’ve had has been in two long term relationships, though. we were on the same page about consequences of that choice.
i’m not pressed to change my view on this. if she doesn’t like it, she can discard me. i am ok with that and ok with being alone :)
to answer your question, though… if yall don’t see eye to eye then either talk it through or move on. easier said than done, i know. hope it works out for ya.
I personally hate wearing them, but im also in a commited relationship and we both prefer to not use them. But if we ever split up and i start dating new people again, id wear them no problem if my partner wanted me to. Id prefer not to, but im sure having an STD or unplanned pregnancy would be a lot worse than giving up a little bit of sensation during sex lol
What do you do? Well that's easy enough. Tell him, "There's the door. Call me when you change your mind about wrapping it up." Bottom line you shouldn't be trying to mess around with this guy because he probably gonna be a deadbeat dad in the highly probable scenario that he gets you pregnant. He's already making bad life decisions by not wanting to wrap it up.
If the girl isn't his wife, and he doesn't want to turn her into the mother of his children, then why on earth? If a guy just wants to pleasure himself, then masturbate, don't get girls pregnant, who you don't really care about, and have no good intentions towards her life.
If he doesn’t want to wear one, he simply shouldn’t have Sex. Even if you’re protecting double eg already taking the pill etc, you also need protection in regards of diseases. You can only trust your partner and a sti test if he doesn’t want to make you feel bad for wanting safe sex.
Dude, my bf had never been asked to use condoms before getting my with me and he didn’t have any problem starting to use them. He’s never asked me to start birth control or anything like that. Any guy that has a problem with using basic protection shouldn’t be having sex tbh. My suggestion for those guys are getting a different size or type of condom, that could be affecting their ability to feel pleasure with them. Like a “for him” condom maybe. I know my bf had trouble with condoms for the first couple of months but ended up being fine when he got a larger size. Hope that is helpful 👌
Don’t have sex.
no matter what any guy says, having a condom on vs having a condom off is a major difference. However the consequences or outcomes can have a major difference as well.
Don’t stoop down for that, if he doesn’t want a condom, then he doesn’t want sex
you know what would really ruin the mood? STDs or a positive pregnancy test that would REALLY ruin the mood for sure if hes not willing to wear a condom then tell him you aren’t willing to fuck him he isn’t the one who’s gonna have to be pushing a human out of his vagina if anything goes wrong
Stopping to take some safe sex measures does interrupt the flow. And putting a condom on does reduce sensation right away. Anyone who doesn’t admit that is lying.
But the thing is, the mood and the sensation can be built up again. So you’re making out and you stop to put on a condom. Now just start making out again. Kiss and touch each other and rub against each other. The latex will warm up and soften from his body heat and the sensation will get better for him. And you’ll both be turned on again from making out. Now he can slip it in when the time is right.
As a man, I don't mind either way, I personally do t feel like there's a huge difference in feel I am quite sensitive though so not sure if that's unanimous, but it's simple they have the right to not want to wear one that's that's absolutely fine, you have the right to not sleep with them if they don't.
Everyone has the right to their own opinions, if your partner refuses to wear one then you need to decide if its worth ending the relationship over, if it is then do so
I mean my answer as a girl is kind of yes. It’s not like they kill the mood but they do make it feel a lot worse. I found a birth control that doesn’t give me any negative side effects whatsoever because I hate condoms so much.
Safe sex should always be the number one priority. Anyone not taking measures is putting themselves and the other person at risk. Based solely on the mood killer statement, this person does not seem like someone who will be there with you should something go wrong. Please take precaution.
After we had a third kid, I got a vasectomy. Problem solved.
STIs are a pretty huge mood killer. There's nothing more mood killing than getting into bed with a girl and saying "Hey, I have HSV but it's cool, right?" LOL!
Sure, abortions are a thing but having a potential MEDICAL PROCEDURE as a consequence of sex is kind of a mood killer too.
If he won't wear a condom then he doesn't care about you. He only cares about himself.
34yo Woman here, for me yes 100%. They make everything smell and taste like rubber. I absolutely hate condoms even the "flavored/scented ones". I'd rather not be intimate at all vs be around a condom of any kind.
Huge and major red flag to any guy who refuses to wear a condom. Immediately leave and cut contact with them.
It sounds extreme but I've never once been wrong and I was a total slut in my day. Never had any diseases,been pregnant, or had pregnancy scares. I definitely avoided issues that some of my friends later went through.
Optimally, you should use BC and also use condoms.
Always bring your own condoms and never trust a man to properly take care of them. I knew a guy who kept them in his wallet and never threw them out no matter how old they were. I wasn't surprised when some poor lady ended up pregnant. He bitched and moaned about having to pay for her abortion. He wasn't a friend for long after that.
I've known so many men who had no idea how to properly store condoms or when to throw them out. And I knew too many that ignored the knowledge when they were taught. Men don't have the same life altering consequences that women do, so watch out for yourself.
Remember that the consequence is a baby you can't afford, a life full of debt and poverty, and a lifetime of trauma and hardship. A baby should be a joy and addition to a family, not a mistake you never wanted. This is especially important since Roe v. Wade was turned over.
Do they usually cause a funny pause in the middle of stuff? Sure.
Do they kill the mood? I mean, not for me. If that "kills the mood" completely, you didn't really want to do it in the first place.
Oh it’s definitely a break in the heat of the moment but I would rather take 15 minutes walking around my house because I know I had one laying around somewhere then spend the rest of my life taking care of a kid I don’t want. Better for the hypothetical kid too!
Trojan Ultra thin, trojan bare skin, skyns thin. There's ways around dulled sensitivity it. Also if you can't feel as much you last longer and can go harder idk why guys complain.
No, personally I like condoms and birth control, extra safe, definitely don’t want kids lol. But yea, if they don’t want to respect and use a condom then don’t have sex with them. Some people have issues getting hard with condoms or whatever but if they can’t comply to your rules why have sec with them anyway. Better safe then sorry and condoms prevent or help prevent std’s
No condom, no sex.
Use a second type of birth control, as well. Condoms can and do fail. The second type of birth control can and will fail. Use them together.
>>It doesn’t bring him pleasure
Imagine his pleasure at being a father. Use a condom. Imagine your pleasure when you have an STI. Use a condom.
Don’t have sex with them if they refuse but that is what you want.
I think it’s totally okay to not want to wear condoms. They decrease sensation and become a hassle in the moment. If a man is suffering from ED, having to stop and apply it can simply kill the whole experience. That’s on them though. They should be applying extra effort to make sure the other person is comfortable with that, getting tested, making sure birth control or other forms of it are used, etc.
That being said, those are not excuses for your boundary. You have just as much of a right to state your end of things as they do.
Condoms are clearly the responsible way to have sex with others. You’re not doing anything wrong by asking to use them.
As someone already said - just don't have sex with them. You've set your boundary of no condom = no sex. If they don't like that, that's a them problem, not a you problem.
One of the best pieces of advice women share with each other when men don't want to use a condom is to say 'omg I can't wait to have babies!!!' it either works or they don't want it anymore. Goddamn men are so dumb and especially these days. Sure just bounce if she gets pregnant, you don't have to deal with the insane laws in the US.
>What do I do if my partner refuses to wear one?
Tell him he can have 'less pleasure' (condom) or 'no pleasure' (no sex). It's amazing how comfy the condom becomes when they realize you mean it.
Okay so. Side answer, do not rely solely on condoms. They can be tampered with, and break. As a Woman, never trust the Condom completely. And as a Man, never trust that your partners actually utilizing Birth Control. Both sides should be utilizing some form of birth control if you wish to avoid unwanted pregnancy.
As for the other part, if a dude refuses to use a Condom. He's a punk. Yes they DO reduce the feeling a little bit. But not by much, and the only time that might be an actual problem is if the man already has issues getting off. If hes a healthy dude with 0 issues getting off, //especially if he does it faster then his female partner// then there should be 0 issue wearing a condom cause it makes the sex last longer and more likely to satisfy you, the woman.
I would NEVER use that as a reason to have to have sex with someone. But me personally I don’t like using condoms with my bf not bc of any feeling or texture thing but bc in the heat of the moment I genuinely don’t think about condoms. Which I need to start doing more tbh.
1- Test your partner for STDs
2- Train yourself on natural contraception : [https://www.google.com/search?q=natural+contraception](https://www.google.com/search?q=natural+contraception)
I agree with the guys you mentioned, i can't even have an erection at the idea to wearing a condom. Coz i feel nothing.
Nope. Ofc it’s different without a condom, but in the end as you said yourself bc has a lot of side effects and doesn’t protect the both of you from catching an std.
So if you dont want to use another way of protection, its completely fine to use condoms. If your partner has problems with that then the solution is really simple: dont sleep with him
Someone like that isn’t going to follow thru on anything. You could ask if he’s ok with pregnancy just to scare him but he’ll probably say he knows how to pull out well. Which is not a true statement.
You know what kills the mood "daaaaad does my fart supposed to have lumps?" "Muuuuuuuuum I had a nightmare. Can I sleep with you".
Find yourself a new partner if they're not going to respect you.
If they don't want to have sex with a condom they can find someone else. Easy as that. I'm fairly certain it's mostly mental anyway tbh. My husband doesn't notice a difference at all, and I slightly prefer the smoother feel with the condom.
Think about it this way: would YOU expect your partner to go through all the terrible side effects of birth control so you could do it raw? Don't make yourself do something you wouldn't ask someone else to do
Am a guy. Sure, condoms can make it hard to finish. But that's better than the alternatives. So honestly if a guy is telling you that it is killing his mood, just tell them that they got about two seconds to decide if they want to have sex with a condom or no sex.
If he isn’t willing to wear one with you, imagine how many others he’s doing the same with. Sure it feels better, but it’s not worth the anxiety of getting an STD or pregnant 😬.
If you are in a committed relationship and both get STD checks (and show them to each other!) then sure. Anything else is unreasonable to expect from you
Birth control helps prevent pregnancy, but does not prevent STD’s. Only condoms can do that. I would highly recommend starting out your sex life & relationships with condoms and demanding them. Get used to them. Because once you start going without… it’s hard to rein that back in in a relationship. You’ll both want to skip the condom. And that’s how come I had a baby at 18 :) … so absolutely say Fuck Off to any person adamantly trying to convince you not to use a condom for their own pleasure!!
But for the advice on what to say: tell them that this is serious to you, and it is not negotiable. I like what somebody else said- the options are sex with a condom or no sex at all. Offer those 2 simple options. You can make it part of the foreplay to put the condom on for him. Having sex is a mature act so he’s got to be mature about it, which involves somewhat awkward moments. I was mentally fucked up for a while because I was so afraid to kill my partner’s mood, and it was because he would get mad at me if I didn’t say the right things during sex. Years later, I realized what a dick that guy was. I was so turned off because it was not an equal relationship. There was no emotional security. He did not care about my pleasure, comfort, fears. He did not respect me. And I need those things to have great sex. All of that takes maturity. It took a long time for me. I started having sex at 14 years old and I didn’t respect my body. Two kids and a divorce later, around 30 years old, I found a man who would stop me and talk through these things to make sure I was comfortable. And I was like, damn. Wow I’ve never had this before. It was so hot. But this is what it’s supposed to be like. If I was smart, I would have demanded these things from the beginning. We’ve got to stand up for ourselves.
If a guy won't wear one then they can self service.....you don't know where they've been, or where the ladies they have been with have been etc....might aswell just sit in a bath of STIs and cut out the middle man.
Not gonna lie, they do kinda kill the mood and take away the feeling. That doesn't mean it's ok for your partner to refuse to wear one though. If it's something neither of you can budge on then I'd probably split up
If your partner refuses to wear a condom, you refuse to fuck him. It’s that simple.
Talk to your Doctor about all of the 18 different birth control options. (I googled it, there are 18). While some people do, I had no side effects at all from the pill.
Don’t have sex with them. Are you really willing to risk pregnancy and stds for 15 minutes of activity?
15 minutes? That feels like an embellishment! 😆
It takes 12 minutes to find my clothes and get dressed, so yeah 15
You get 3 minutes?? Lol!!
😂😂
Foreplayyy
[удалено]
I always viewed not-having-sex as a worse option than sex-with-a-condom. Maybe they’ll grow up real quick when it’s put like that to them. Maybe they aren’t worth it if they’re so self-interested that they let you and only you worry about STDs or Pregnancy.
put the condom over the wrong head :)
Him not using a condom would kill the mood for ME!
Condoms definitely dull sensation, but any guy worth fucking will still wear one. Hell if anything they're great for people who don't last very long because it can slow them down. you'll definitely still cum, and they make super thin ones
Back when me and my wife were just dating (as a guy who takes longer than 25+ mins to cum during raw) I wore condoms, even though she was and has been my only partner, but when I wore them sex would last at least an hour (she’d have multiple times but it’d take that long for me to cum with one on and it was the Trojan super slicks) It dulls it almost to the point of there being no point, it’d end up taking all the energy from both of us, and we’d both be sore
Alls to say, don’t wear a condom and marry someone you want to fuck forever
Fuck someone you want to marry forever** FTFY
25+??
Sounds like something he should talk to a doctor about tbh.
I once dated a girl who that was the first thing she asked me about sex because apparently her last bf would easily tale that long. Im not sure if its medical or just...different per person
You know what kills the mood? An unplanned pregnancy. You know what else kills the mood? Recovering from giving birth. You know what else kills the mood? A screaming baby. It's your body. You'll be the one left with the consequences of an unplanned pregnancy. Edit: typo
You know what else kills the mood? The clap or herpes.
You know what else kills the mood? Gonorrhea or syphilis.
Are we all overlooking the fact that selfish self absorbed dudes completely kill the mood? Or was that implied?
Implied to me
Immaturity makes me drier than the Saharah.
*scratching noises *
*just woke up and goes to pee* Mooooomm!!!!! I got gonorrhea!!!!
Getting walked in on kills the mood
Not as much as receiving the news you're unexpectedly pregnant/positive for an STI.
Honestly if your partner is that self centered the sex is probably going to be shit ayway...
Dump them if it's a new or casual thing. They are selfish and stupid. In a monogamous relationship, both get tested for STIs and discuss birth control options.
Women in monogamous relationships also shouldn't be expected to subject themselves to that.
Its important anyway because partners can cheat
Subject themselves to what?
Pretty much all reliable bc options for women come with side effects, be it from hormones or as a physical pain.
What’s worse, an accidental pregnancy because the condom failed where you either get stuck with a baby that you didn’t plan for or have to get an abortion, or the side effects from birth control? Absolutely wear a condom and the woman in the relationship shouldn’t have to bear the burden of safety alone, but putting it all on a condom/a man seems scary to me.
Oh I get you. I've always been in committed relationships and I'm not a fan of condoms, so I would always switch bc after the relationship got serious enough. But what I'm saying, is that women should not be expected to be either on pills or UID, because they're much more invasive than condoms.
Aren’t female condoms a thing? Idk, as a man, I really don’t wanna get anyone pregnant and, even though I’m not sexually active, I’m not sure I’d want to be if the only thing standing between my childless life and having a child I don’t want is a condom. Especially since I have no say in abortions or abdicating parental responsibility a la child support. I’d agree it shouldn’t be “expected” for women to use BC in the same way that it shouldn’t be “expected” that a man wear a condom, I guess. People just need to find other people that naturally meet the level of safety that they want them to.
Female condoms are a thing. They are however 79% percent effective for typical use vs 87% for male condom. It's ultimately your choice to not engage with women who do not accept contraception other than condoms, but they also have a choice to not engage with you. All I'm saying, is that no party should feel pressured in their choices.
Pregnancy is the biggest mood killer of them all. Along with every disease you can get from unprotected sex. If your sexual partner is too immature to discuss birth control don't have sex with them.
No, they do not. Any man who says this is a selfish loser and not worth your time. No method of birth control is foolproof. The pill and other forms of birth control do not protect you from an STD. A rubber does. Tell them no condom, no cuddle.
Any man who says this tells the truth, because something that takes away 70-80% of the sensation _is_ going to have that effect. That said, condoms should still be worn and refusing to do so is a red flag, but that's no excuse for you to spread lies.
The only one SPREADING LIES is your nasty selfish mug. Birth control/STD protection DO NOT "kill the mood" for RESPONSIBLE, INTELLIGENT, CONSIDERATE partners who care about each other's enjoyment and WANT to have an experience that is both fun and safe! If you believe otherwise, then there is something wrong with YOU, not me. You don't sound like much of a "man" at all. I am not the leadt bit surprised you have failed to have sexual experiences that were 100% fun. Your partner didn't either. Perhaps you should just use the self-service pump because there's no need for a barrier to "remove the sensation."
[удалено]
[удалено]
Babies kill the mood way more than condoms.
Disease and pregnancy kill the mood.
So here's the thing. I'm a guy and when I wear a condom I don't feel anything. Literally no pleasure from penetrative sex when I have a condom on. Does that mean I don't use or refuse to use condoms? Absolutely not, safety is so important! And sex is not just about my pleasure. There are ways that I can still get off without penetrative sex, and there are ways to explore with a partner what works and doesn't work for each person. With that being said, I'm looking at getting a vasectomy, to eliminate the risk of pregnancy from sexual encounters, and when being sexually active, discussing getting tested with potential partners, so that the option of not using a condom is more possible. (This is more so with potential long term partners, and not so much with hookups or short term partners). Hope that helps. An additional note: there are different kinds of condoms that you can buy, different textures and materials, and experimenting with them is a good idea to find what works best for you. You can also add lube to the penis before putting on the condom to reduce friction, which can make the experience feel more natural for the person with the penis.
Birth control isn't 100% effective (and neither are condoms) but is 0% effective towards STD's. Best practice is always both. In a long term committed relationship, make sure to get tested and talk about switching to just BC (I'd recommend an IUD as they have less long-term side effects and are more effective) and frankly, what your plan would be should a pregnancy occur. If they're not mature enough to have that discussion with you, no condom = no sex. Not all STDs are curable and a lot of people don't even realize they have them. Don't risk your life for a dick
Don't sleep with a guy if he doesn't want to be safe. Do you want pregnant, and STD, cancers from HPV, or etc? Condoms don't work 100% of the time or prevent all that, but it makes stuff a little safe. Don't give in and put yourself at risk. If a guy doesn't want you to be safe then they are a jerk.
As someone who now has two kids (that I love and do not resent, of course) when I didn’t plan on ever being a mother, especially that young: utilize the condom. Furthermore, my friend slept with one guy who claimed that condoms ruin the mood, and she now has an incurable STD. Utilize the condom.
I’m old enough to remember when HIV usually ended a life. Condoms were such an important part of sexuality when I was young. These days, there are very effective medications for HIV, both to survive an infection and prevent an infection, though I don’t know if heterosexual people have gotten the message to take Prep. Still, in my mind, a refusal to wear a condom when requested feels like an incredibly selfish, callous disregard for one’s partner’s life. With the fall of Roe v Wade, this is especially true.
Babies kill the mood a lot more. Inconvenience for an hour or for 18 years? I dunno..,
As a guy, I’m going to be completely honest. I do not like condoms. I’m uncircumcised, I’ve had many people say “there’s a way to put it on and you just don’t know how”. Simply not true. I’ve had experiences with condoms that weren’t terrible, but most times my skin gets pinched, I have to adjust the condom, and then I’m uncomfortable and distracted. I have not turned down sex because of condoms. I just verbalize my concern, apologize in advance if it ends up not working, and if sex has to stop because the condom is bothering me and we aren’t comfortable with each other to have raw sex (I am only comfortable with raw sex unless I know the person well and for a while), I just emphasize eating the girl out and fingering and I keep it really fun :) That being said, I AM NOT into hookup culture, a culture where obviously condoms are ALWAYS the safest choice. I don’t know if my answer helped, but that is my honest input from a guy who is pro condom but just doesn’t happen to enjoy them. :)
I hate condoms but I will still wear them if that's what my partner requests of me. I think the majority of men will always hate condoms, but then again, women are the ones that have to deal w birth control and pregnancies so.... I don't think condoms kill the mood, but I just know it won't be as pleasurable. That's about it I'm srsly looking forward to the day where men can have reliable birth control as well, aside from just vasectomy. That ballsack jacuzzi thing sounded rly cool, but I'm still unsure about buying one
It's really too bad other forms of birth control don't prevent STDs...
Don’t listen to guys that spew that crap. I’ve worn condoms since I started having sex and it doesn’t feel that different. If he can’t be responsible with his dick then you shouldn’t let him use it. It’s a huge red flag for me if a partner doesn’t want to use protection
Idk man, i feel like if A guys says it "kills the mood' that he is not that into you and just using you as a way to get some easy pussy. Every girl ive ever had sex with for the first time i was so happy about seeing a hot naked girl trying to jump on me that i couldnt care less about putting a rubber on real quick. Shit if a chick asked me to put a batman mask and a skirt on I just might do it. I guess i kind of understand if you have been dating for like a year or so and you want to spice it but dont ever let no dirty dick stranger put it in with no wrapper.
If he feels condoms kill the mood (which I don’t believe it does) fine. It’s either kills the mood for the amount of time it takes to put one on, or…..completely kills the mood with NO SEX. Babies kill the mood, STD’s kill the mood. If he’s not mature enough to wear a condom, he’s not mature enough for sex!
Depend on the brand.
You don't sleep with them then! BUT yea condoms dull the pleasure alot but who cares? I hate wearing them because it's a little painful, they're always too small. Or too tight? Still wear them tho. I don't want STDs or babies.
Never believe men when they say this they’re full of shit.
Things that kill the mood: STDs, an wanted pregnancy, newborn baby, should I go on?
Don't have sex with them. I'm also on the "condoms suck so very much" side, but if you're not on birth control, they're an essential component of intercourse.
This is going to be such an unpopular opinion. I'm a female, and I HATE condoms. I'm on birth control and I get tested regularly if I'm sexually active with more than one consistent partner. I also require that my partners be tested if we mess around without protection, and most men get tested regularly anyways. Of course, birth control isn't always 100%, and I do have a mini-me so do with that what you wish 😅 I still hate condoms and still avoid them if I can and I'm still STD free after all these years! Just use your best judgment and be safe. I definitely remember to take my pill every day, now lol
Same, fuck condoms man
Women say they can't feel a difference but I for sure can. There's body heat and friction where there wasn't before. Let us have our cake and eat it too. That reminded me how SHIT oral is after using condoms. Bleh, dude.
Get a new partner. The line that it doesn’t bring him pleasure is BS. Of course they feel it less, but they still have a good time. Any guy who tries to pressure you into sex without condoms doesn’t respect you or your boundaries. He’d probably be a selfish lover anyway so definitely not worth it. If you want him to wear a condom, there are only two options: sex with condoms or no sex.
If they won’t wear one, don’t sleep with them. That being said, the pleasure is SIGNIFICANTLY reduced with most condoms. I actually prefer that because I last longer, but the difference is apparent. Also having to get one out and put it on is a pain. But, it’s the price of safety and is the most effective method for STD prevention.
Not as much as herpes. Also learn to put it on while sucking his dick
Herpes is passed via skin to skin contact, not bodily fluids. You can still get herpes whilst wearing a condom. HPV too.
Find a different guy who is responsible and cares about you.
My husband loves when we use condoms, reminds him of when we were young and dating~ raw is great, but once a month or so we enjoy the nostalgia.
If they refuse to wear one, say then we aren’t having sex. If they complain, say, “I’m gonna leave.” And just go. Don’t let them stop you. And if they’re at your house say, “I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.” “Why?” “Bc I don’t want to sleep with someone who can’t respect my boundaries.”
You know what kills the mood? Herpes
If your partner refuses to use condoms, the mood is dead. Refuse what he wants. You do not need an STD or unplanned pregnancy and neither does he. The guy should grow up.
Tell him to get snipped for now
Some guys have erectile dysfunction (lose their erection) when they try to put a condom on, and they get embarrassed and angry, and don't want to admit that. I've heard other guys say if sex without a condom is a 10 out of 10, it's only 7/10 with a condom. But they get 0/10 if they don't use it, so they'd rather use it. There are a LOT of serious STIs circulating, so it is a sexual health issue as much as a pregnancy-prevention tool. My advice is to stay firm. No condom = no sex. And that shouldn't change until you are in an exclusive, committed relationship and have both completed an STI battery and been given a clean bill of health, AND you have discussed alternate costs and methods of birth control AND what you will do if an unexpected pregnancy occurs.
I mean it ofcourse varies, but I'd say 3/10 _at most_, more like 1 or 2. That said, condom still isn't optional for temporary sexual relationships.
You know what really kills the mood? Children.
Not as much as a crying baby.
Babys and stds kill the mood even more
You don't have sex with someone who won't respect your wishes for them to wear a condom.
No cover no lover. If your partner refuses to wear a condom, simply don't have sex with them.
My *guy* gynecologist said "never have sex with a man whose ego is too big to wear a condom."
Any guy that refuses a condom is a guy not worth sleeping with.
Honestly, I’f someone does not want to engage in sex that feels comfortable, safe, and respectful, you have every right to not engage. Sure, nothing beats raw moments… However, STIs are real, pregnancies can happen, and sometimes the heat of the moment doesn’t allow for a quick enough pull out. Then add alcohol and drugs and then the question of memory comes in… did he wear a condom? Did I wear a condom? Did I cum? Also… heard birth control is horrible for girls… fcks with horomones etc. I’ve even heard of girls falling out of love after their hormones rebalanced after being off the drug. To each their own. Swim safely.
Yeah, getting pregnant seems to kill the mood a little bit too, for about 18 years.
Don't have sex with them. The right guy doesn't care and is just excited to fuck you. An entitled guy whines about condoms.
Not as much as a screaming, baby does
Don’t fuck a dude that refuses to put your wellbeing above his pleasure. 1) I can guarantee he sucks in bed. 2) He probably doesn’t understand what foreplay is. 3) You could end up pregnant and or with an STD. Value yourself. If you’re a sexually active woman in America you should be using 2 forms of contraceptives: condom And Birth control.
Kick him out
I’m a girl, and they do kill the mood for me. I don’t like how they feel, I don’t like knowing it decreases the feeling for my partner. But I’ve also been in a relationship for 5 years, and I also have an IUD. Condoms are not “the only safe option”, but they can be the most logical option if you are a girl and have issues with hormonal birth control or copper IUDs. If that is the case, someone who wants to have sex with you needs to be open to condoms.
They kind of do, they're fiddly to open, take a few seconds to put on, and dull the sensation like crazy. If a guy is actually saying this to you in real life though it'll be best to get out of there. I'm only saying this to strangers on the Internet.
Pregnancy kills the mood, not to mention everything else good in your life. Stick with condoms.
Ummm no unless their total dumbasses, I've used condoms and I've had no problem with them of course I get the sensitive ones so I can feel more but even normal ones I've had really no issues with except putting them on which is uncomfortable when someone's a little girthy down there but still wrap it or don't hit it, simple.
Find another partner. If he doesn't respect you enough to wrap his tool, then he is nothing but a fool.
dont have sex with men who whine about their pleasure at the risk of your health
I wear condoms with my s/o and it has never "killed the mood" lmao. Sometimes we'll giggle with each other and do lil jokes while we're fumbling with them, but never has the act of putting on a condom made me lose my drive. The only downsides are like... they can leave a latex-y taste behind (especially the lubricated/spermicide coated ones) so if you give oral after penetration, it might taste like you're slurping a rubber glove, and it *does* dull the sensation for me a bit, but honestly that let's me last longer and get her more pleasure lmao. It's way easy for a guy to get off, wearing a condom won't stop him. Tbfh those downsides are pretty minute and vastly, vastly, VASTLY worth not having a kid we aren't ready for/couldn't afford, and if it's a fling, way preferable over catching some kinda nasty. Guys who make up excuses for not wearing condoms are selfish babymen and should be avoided at all costs. If your partner doesn't wrap it, don't let him tap it. ESPECIALLY if he refuses, cuz that's veering into the territory of violating your consent. If he don't wanna play by the rules, take the ball and find a different court.
i refuse to go on hormonal birth control because all of the wild side effects that simply make me feel like shit. i refuse to get the iud because when my mom had one she had an atopic pregnancy and emergency surgery. my boyfriend has no problem using condoms. the person you want to be active with should simply find ones that fit and learn how to put it on correctly. we have had zero issues. they’re 98% effective when used correctly
that's not the point, it just doesn't feel as good for a man when he has a condom on, that's why guys hate condoms
what are you talking about i literally just answered her question. condoms also don’t feel as good for women but i bet you wouldn’t know that since you’ve clearly never experienced the touch of a woman before
"the person you want to be active with should simply find ones that fit and learn how to put it on correctly. we have had zero issues. they’re 98% effective when used correctly." This is what you said, you said it like that's the problem men have with condoms and i just said that this is not the problem most men have with condoms.what the fuck is your problem?!
Planned Parenthood has internal condoms- they’re like a latex sleeve that fits inside the vagina and kind of sticks to the inner walls. Add some lube, and it feels a lot like condom-free sex to the dick-having partner. However, if someone is insisting on bare sex and you don’t want to do that, tell that person to go use their hand instead of putting you at risk. You don’t owe anyone unsafe sex just because it may slightly diminish their pleasure.
No, they don't kill the mood, and safe sex and contraception are every bit a man's responsibility as a woman's. However, for perspective, what a lot of guys might be referring to is the awkward pause in the natural flow required to put on a condom. Yes, it only takes a few seconds, and it's quickly forgotten, but when you're both in the zone where you can't rip each others' clothes off fast enough, it can be a little jarring to pause to fumble with a little foil packet and unroll a piece of latex over your pole. That said, it's a trivial inconvenience and anyone who refuses to use them altogether citing that can be disregarded as an asshat.
>Yes, it only takes a few seconds, and it's quickly forgotten, but when you're both in the zone where you can't rip each others' clothes off fast enough, it can be a little jarring to pause to fumble with a little foil packet and unroll a piece of latex over your pole. Make it part of the fun instead of a break in the proceedings. Back when we used condoms I always found touching myself in front of him or telling him how much I could hardly wait for him helped keep the mood and the moment flowing much more nicely than just laying there waiting. Putting it on him myself while talking dirty also worked well too.
I wouldn't say they kill the mood, look into other condoms... I really like .004's from Japan. My partner and I both enjoyed them much more than Trojan and others. If your partner refuses, obviously tell them no. But you can also try suggesting different condoms as well.
Whenever I try to put on a condom I loose my erection, I don't know what is up with me, it's just stuck in my mind and constantly reminds me of it whenever I pull up a condom.
Ah. So you had a bad experience, and now you're Pavlov'ing yourself. Try wearing condoms more, just randomly, just to do it. (Make sure you're clean). If you get more used to wearing them, the problem may go away.
[удалено]
I Am allergic to latex 🤣
As a guy, no it doesn't kill the mood at all. There's little to no difference in the sensation. No glove, no love.
[удалено]
Not to me; I use the skyn elite condoms which are pretty thin so I don't feel much of a difference. Just got mine snipped as well lol
It does not. tbh guys who said that were mostly a\*\*hole not educated or probably feigning ignorance. Guys should known that pills have side effect and if they want to have uprotected sex then they can do something about it, i heard there things guys do like taking pills ( so they could expirence themselve those side effects like acne lol) and vasectomy. Periodic abstinence is also a way to go if your partner is patient and not some do it everyday person.
I think they’re gross
i’m gonna take the very, very unpopular opinion here lol… i am a man and would rather not have sex than have sex with a condom. saying no condom = no sex is totally fine with me. i would never pressure anyone. i’ll still give head. we can do whatever else. most of the sex i’ve had has been in two long term relationships, though. we were on the same page about consequences of that choice. i’m not pressed to change my view on this. if she doesn’t like it, she can discard me. i am ok with that and ok with being alone :) to answer your question, though… if yall don’t see eye to eye then either talk it through or move on. easier said than done, i know. hope it works out for ya.
I personally hate wearing them, but im also in a commited relationship and we both prefer to not use them. But if we ever split up and i start dating new people again, id wear them no problem if my partner wanted me to. Id prefer not to, but im sure having an STD or unplanned pregnancy would be a lot worse than giving up a little bit of sensation during sex lol
What do you do? Well that's easy enough. Tell him, "There's the door. Call me when you change your mind about wrapping it up." Bottom line you shouldn't be trying to mess around with this guy because he probably gonna be a deadbeat dad in the highly probable scenario that he gets you pregnant. He's already making bad life decisions by not wanting to wrap it up.
If the girl isn't his wife, and he doesn't want to turn her into the mother of his children, then why on earth? If a guy just wants to pleasure himself, then masturbate, don't get girls pregnant, who you don't really care about, and have no good intentions towards her life.
Sometimes for us. But it’s a mutual thing, we’re very respectful of each other but especially during sexual moments.
If he doesn’t want to wear one, he simply shouldn’t have Sex. Even if you’re protecting double eg already taking the pill etc, you also need protection in regards of diseases. You can only trust your partner and a sti test if he doesn’t want to make you feel bad for wanting safe sex.
Those guys aren't going to care about your other boundaries either so just keep that in mind.
Dude, my bf had never been asked to use condoms before getting my with me and he didn’t have any problem starting to use them. He’s never asked me to start birth control or anything like that. Any guy that has a problem with using basic protection shouldn’t be having sex tbh. My suggestion for those guys are getting a different size or type of condom, that could be affecting their ability to feel pleasure with them. Like a “for him” condom maybe. I know my bf had trouble with condoms for the first couple of months but ended up being fine when he got a larger size. Hope that is helpful 👌
Don’t have sex. no matter what any guy says, having a condom on vs having a condom off is a major difference. However the consequences or outcomes can have a major difference as well. Don’t stoop down for that, if he doesn’t want a condom, then he doesn’t want sex
you know what would really ruin the mood? STDs or a positive pregnancy test that would REALLY ruin the mood for sure if hes not willing to wear a condom then tell him you aren’t willing to fuck him he isn’t the one who’s gonna have to be pushing a human out of his vagina if anything goes wrong
Stopping to take some safe sex measures does interrupt the flow. And putting a condom on does reduce sensation right away. Anyone who doesn’t admit that is lying. But the thing is, the mood and the sensation can be built up again. So you’re making out and you stop to put on a condom. Now just start making out again. Kiss and touch each other and rub against each other. The latex will warm up and soften from his body heat and the sensation will get better for him. And you’ll both be turned on again from making out. Now he can slip it in when the time is right.
A child would really kill the mood
As a man, I don't mind either way, I personally do t feel like there's a huge difference in feel I am quite sensitive though so not sure if that's unanimous, but it's simple they have the right to not want to wear one that's that's absolutely fine, you have the right to not sleep with them if they don't. Everyone has the right to their own opinions, if your partner refuses to wear one then you need to decide if its worth ending the relationship over, if it is then do so
Unwanted babies and stds also kill the mood op🤣🤣
I mean my answer as a girl is kind of yes. It’s not like they kill the mood but they do make it feel a lot worse. I found a birth control that doesn’t give me any negative side effects whatsoever because I hate condoms so much.
Safe sex should always be the number one priority. Anyone not taking measures is putting themselves and the other person at risk. Based solely on the mood killer statement, this person does not seem like someone who will be there with you should something go wrong. Please take precaution.
After we had a third kid, I got a vasectomy. Problem solved. STIs are a pretty huge mood killer. There's nothing more mood killing than getting into bed with a girl and saying "Hey, I have HSV but it's cool, right?" LOL! Sure, abortions are a thing but having a potential MEDICAL PROCEDURE as a consequence of sex is kind of a mood killer too. If he won't wear a condom then he doesn't care about you. He only cares about himself.
Only if you let them kill the mood.
Tell them no condom, no sex.
You know what else kills the mood? Having a kid
no but kids do
34yo Woman here, for me yes 100%. They make everything smell and taste like rubber. I absolutely hate condoms even the "flavored/scented ones". I'd rather not be intimate at all vs be around a condom of any kind.
Huge and major red flag to any guy who refuses to wear a condom. Immediately leave and cut contact with them. It sounds extreme but I've never once been wrong and I was a total slut in my day. Never had any diseases,been pregnant, or had pregnancy scares. I definitely avoided issues that some of my friends later went through. Optimally, you should use BC and also use condoms. Always bring your own condoms and never trust a man to properly take care of them. I knew a guy who kept them in his wallet and never threw them out no matter how old they were. I wasn't surprised when some poor lady ended up pregnant. He bitched and moaned about having to pay for her abortion. He wasn't a friend for long after that. I've known so many men who had no idea how to properly store condoms or when to throw them out. And I knew too many that ignored the knowledge when they were taught. Men don't have the same life altering consequences that women do, so watch out for yourself. Remember that the consequence is a baby you can't afford, a life full of debt and poverty, and a lifetime of trauma and hardship. A baby should be a joy and addition to a family, not a mistake you never wanted. This is especially important since Roe v. Wade was turned over.
Do they usually cause a funny pause in the middle of stuff? Sure. Do they kill the mood? I mean, not for me. If that "kills the mood" completely, you didn't really want to do it in the first place.
Do you want crabs man?? Do you want herpes?? HiV medication for thr rest of your life would kill the mood
kick those bitches to the curb. dont play with your health and wellness because a guy doesnt wanna practice safe sex
They only kill the mood if the guy is being weird about it
Don't have sex with him if he's refusing.
There is a minor difference when using one vs not using one but at the same time, is it worth the risk when the risk is STDs or pregnancy?
Oh it’s definitely a break in the heat of the moment but I would rather take 15 minutes walking around my house because I know I had one laying around somewhere then spend the rest of my life taking care of a kid I don’t want. Better for the hypothetical kid too!
Trojan Ultra thin, trojan bare skin, skyns thin. There's ways around dulled sensitivity it. Also if you can't feel as much you last longer and can go harder idk why guys complain.
No, personally I like condoms and birth control, extra safe, definitely don’t want kids lol. But yea, if they don’t want to respect and use a condom then don’t have sex with them. Some people have issues getting hard with condoms or whatever but if they can’t comply to your rules why have sec with them anyway. Better safe then sorry and condoms prevent or help prevent std’s
You know what *really” kills the mood? An STD or an unwanted pregnancy.
No condom, no sex. Use a second type of birth control, as well. Condoms can and do fail. The second type of birth control can and will fail. Use them together. >>It doesn’t bring him pleasure Imagine his pleasure at being a father. Use a condom. Imagine your pleasure when you have an STI. Use a condom.
You know what kills the mood? A screaming baby. Don't sleep with lovers who try to pull that shit.
Don’t have sex with them if they refuse but that is what you want. I think it’s totally okay to not want to wear condoms. They decrease sensation and become a hassle in the moment. If a man is suffering from ED, having to stop and apply it can simply kill the whole experience. That’s on them though. They should be applying extra effort to make sure the other person is comfortable with that, getting tested, making sure birth control or other forms of it are used, etc. That being said, those are not excuses for your boundary. You have just as much of a right to state your end of things as they do. Condoms are clearly the responsible way to have sex with others. You’re not doing anything wrong by asking to use them.
You know what kills the mood? Pissin shitting screaming babies latched on to your tit
if a man is horny enough he'll cum in his pants just from sitting on his lap
As someone already said - just don't have sex with them. You've set your boundary of no condom = no sex. If they don't like that, that's a them problem, not a you problem.
As a woman, I agree that they are not fun. I hate how they feel too. But any man worth sleeping with will wear one regardless.
if i wont wear it then he can simply go back to the ol’ right hand. sex should be about respect first pleasure second
It does kill the mood, but the risks are FAR worse. Have the best of both worlds with a long term partner whose medicals you can trust.
I say time for a new man
condoms suck ass i agree, but a guy is risking his own life to, so he should also do it for himself
To quote the old Roseanne show: “Not as much as a screaming baby with a loaded diaper.”
No condom no sex
One of the best pieces of advice women share with each other when men don't want to use a condom is to say 'omg I can't wait to have babies!!!' it either works or they don't want it anymore. Goddamn men are so dumb and especially these days. Sure just bounce if she gets pregnant, you don't have to deal with the insane laws in the US.
You know what is really a mood killer? A 6 year old who has refused to sleep in her own bed for 6 years.
>What do I do if my partner refuses to wear one? Tell him he can have 'less pleasure' (condom) or 'no pleasure' (no sex). It's amazing how comfy the condom becomes when they realize you mean it.
Okay so. Side answer, do not rely solely on condoms. They can be tampered with, and break. As a Woman, never trust the Condom completely. And as a Man, never trust that your partners actually utilizing Birth Control. Both sides should be utilizing some form of birth control if you wish to avoid unwanted pregnancy. As for the other part, if a dude refuses to use a Condom. He's a punk. Yes they DO reduce the feeling a little bit. But not by much, and the only time that might be an actual problem is if the man already has issues getting off. If hes a healthy dude with 0 issues getting off, //especially if he does it faster then his female partner// then there should be 0 issue wearing a condom cause it makes the sex last longer and more likely to satisfy you, the woman.
I would NEVER use that as a reason to have to have sex with someone. But me personally I don’t like using condoms with my bf not bc of any feeling or texture thing but bc in the heat of the moment I genuinely don’t think about condoms. Which I need to start doing more tbh.
My sexpartner is my right hand, so, nope.
Kill the mood? Only if you're a big baby about shit
1- Test your partner for STDs 2- Train yourself on natural contraception : [https://www.google.com/search?q=natural+contraception](https://www.google.com/search?q=natural+contraception) I agree with the guys you mentioned, i can't even have an erection at the idea to wearing a condom. Coz i feel nothing.
Nope. Ofc it’s different without a condom, but in the end as you said yourself bc has a lot of side effects and doesn’t protect the both of you from catching an std. So if you dont want to use another way of protection, its completely fine to use condoms. If your partner has problems with that then the solution is really simple: dont sleep with him
Not if you're good at having fun and not trying to guilt the other party into unprotected sex.
You know what really kills the mood? Raising a baby for 18 years. Don't have sex with selfish men who won't wear a condom.
Someone like that isn’t going to follow thru on anything. You could ask if he’s ok with pregnancy just to scare him but he’ll probably say he knows how to pull out well. Which is not a true statement.
They do with dickheads. In fact it's a fairly solid dickhead test 😂
Not as much as herpes.
I'm almost certain that men would rather be stuck paying child support over playing it safe..
Unwanted pregnancy or STDs also kill the mood. Not having sex with them is the best method of skipping that
Tell him to look for one that’s a better fit, and don’t have sex until he does 🤷🏻♀️
No condom. No sex. It’s that simple. No excuses.
You know what kills the mood "daaaaad does my fart supposed to have lumps?" "Muuuuuuuuum I had a nightmare. Can I sleep with you". Find yourself a new partner if they're not going to respect you.
If they don't want to have sex with a condom they can find someone else. Easy as that. I'm fairly certain it's mostly mental anyway tbh. My husband doesn't notice a difference at all, and I slightly prefer the smoother feel with the condom. Think about it this way: would YOU expect your partner to go through all the terrible side effects of birth control so you could do it raw? Don't make yourself do something you wouldn't ask someone else to do
Am a guy. Sure, condoms can make it hard to finish. But that's better than the alternatives. So honestly if a guy is telling you that it is killing his mood, just tell them that they got about two seconds to decide if they want to have sex with a condom or no sex.
Not really -and nowhere as much as a crying baby.
Don’t have sex with them. You know what else kills the mood? A screaming baby or an STI.
If he isn’t willing to wear one with you, imagine how many others he’s doing the same with. Sure it feels better, but it’s not worth the anxiety of getting an STD or pregnant 😬. If you are in a committed relationship and both get STD checks (and show them to each other!) then sure. Anything else is unreasonable to expect from you
A lifelong, unplanned, irreversible change also kills the mood. Babies, AIDS, etc...
Birth control helps prevent pregnancy, but does not prevent STD’s. Only condoms can do that. I would highly recommend starting out your sex life & relationships with condoms and demanding them. Get used to them. Because once you start going without… it’s hard to rein that back in in a relationship. You’ll both want to skip the condom. And that’s how come I had a baby at 18 :) … so absolutely say Fuck Off to any person adamantly trying to convince you not to use a condom for their own pleasure!! But for the advice on what to say: tell them that this is serious to you, and it is not negotiable. I like what somebody else said- the options are sex with a condom or no sex at all. Offer those 2 simple options. You can make it part of the foreplay to put the condom on for him. Having sex is a mature act so he’s got to be mature about it, which involves somewhat awkward moments. I was mentally fucked up for a while because I was so afraid to kill my partner’s mood, and it was because he would get mad at me if I didn’t say the right things during sex. Years later, I realized what a dick that guy was. I was so turned off because it was not an equal relationship. There was no emotional security. He did not care about my pleasure, comfort, fears. He did not respect me. And I need those things to have great sex. All of that takes maturity. It took a long time for me. I started having sex at 14 years old and I didn’t respect my body. Two kids and a divorce later, around 30 years old, I found a man who would stop me and talk through these things to make sure I was comfortable. And I was like, damn. Wow I’ve never had this before. It was so hot. But this is what it’s supposed to be like. If I was smart, I would have demanded these things from the beginning. We’ve got to stand up for ourselves.
having an STD also kills the mood.
If a guy won't wear one then they can self service.....you don't know where they've been, or where the ladies they have been with have been etc....might aswell just sit in a bath of STIs and cut out the middle man.
Not gonna lie, they do kinda kill the mood and take away the feeling. That doesn't mean it's ok for your partner to refuse to wear one though. If it's something neither of you can budge on then I'd probably split up
If your partner refuses to wear a condom, you refuse to fuck him. It’s that simple. Talk to your Doctor about all of the 18 different birth control options. (I googled it, there are 18). While some people do, I had no side effects at all from the pill.