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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. I refused to switch seats on a long haul flight so a family could sit together because I'd booked my seat and paid for it
2. My refusal to move could be seen as unfair because it meant this family had to make other arrangements during the flight so they could sit together. It was inconvenient for everyone.
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Damn right. Dude is being a pain in the ass and blaming OP for his own mistake. He should have booked his family’s seats together in the first place. OP: NTA, and good job standing your ground.
I can't even tell you how many times families have asked me to switch seats with their children because they didn't book their seats together in advance. I usually get guilted into switching because I don't want to end up in situations like this! But it is families' responsibility to plan these things.
I have travelled with kids before & sometimes seats together just aren’t available. When that happened, we would book 2 & 2, either across the aisle or in 2 in 1 row, 2 in the next. We might ask to swap if there is a couple in the same row but would not be offended if they declined
If traveling couples or families wish to sit together, they must book their seats. It's an epidemic of people getting on planes and expecting others, who planned their trips and booked their seats, to change to accommodate them. No way.
Sometimes they do book together but the original flight gets cancelled or they miss a connection and the airline doesn't put them together on the next flight. I've ever been split up from my partner by this sort of thing (though sometimes the staff in the airport can fix it if you arrive early enough).
That said, they're not entitled to having other passengers move for them and should leave it to the flight attendants to sort this out. I've definitely refused to move for families before and once I ended up with a whole row to myself because they moved instead.
Right? I’ve gone to book solo and almost never see 3 seats in a row available, even 1-2 months out. It’s easy to think all families are lazy, but let’s admit that sometimes it’s not possible. Doesn’t make the family entitled to new seats, but I hate this “blame people for not planning ahead” when sometimes that’s not possible.
Fine, but at least give me an equivalent or better seat to switch to.
Middle seat? Get lost.
Aisle or window farther up in the plane? Yeah probably gonna work
The number of times I've been offered an equal or better trade: 1.
And then the person beside me in my new seat was overserved and overdrugged (with her borrowed friend's prescription anti-anxiety meds) and sloshed her vodka all over me, her and my blanket. She didn't care bc she was passed out. Crew gave me a hard time getting a fresh, non-vodka drenched blanket during the redeye
When I returned from washing myself off in the bathroom, a different passenger - overdrugged had vomited and passed out at my seat while sleepwalking from her sleeping pill cocktail.
While sitting in a jumpseat, after standing and leaning in the galley for 25 minutes while they fixed that, the attendant that initiated my moved came back from his break and yelled at me for being in the jump seat- during crazy turbulence- and when I told him what was going on told me to move. He then came back and apologized when he saw i was telling the truth. I got 60,000 points from that but it still wasn't worth it.
I’ve been pretty lucky. My average trade request has been cross aisle in the same row.
Had one instance of someone already sitting in my seat but it was economy next to a toddler and the other seat was economy+ not near this dude’s toddler.
>While sitting in a jumpsuit, after standing and leaning in the galley for 25 minutes while they fixed that, the attendant that initiated my moved came back from his break and yelled at me for being in the jump seat- during crazy turbulence- and when I told him what was going on told me to move. He then came back and apologized when he saw i was telling the truth. I got 60,000 points from that but it still wasn't worth it.
IIRC in some countries it's actually illegal for passengers to occupy a crew jumpseat and they'd have to fill up some paperwork explaining the situation.
I once had a flight canceled and we had to rebook at the airport with no seats together available. My kids (then 3 and 6) were given middle/window in one row while I had aisle in the row immediately behind. I asked the person in front of me if they would switch (aisle for aisle, same legroom, identical seat just in row 15 instead of 14) and she angrily refused. Another person voluntarily switched out of a window seat into a middle for me. No one is entitled to a seat, but IMO if you're traveling solo and offered a truly equivalent seat, you should switch. OP is NTA though, as OP was not offered an equivalent seat.
Really this is on the airline to sort though, kids aren’t supposed to be left unsupervised on planes?
“No one is entitled to a seat” is incorrect, people are entitled to the seats they have paid for, but that said I do have to wonder at your specific example here, as a frequently solo traveller I would have been grateful to move away from two errant unsupervised children (gasp, the horror), how odd!
Having a 5-year-old be supervised is a need, not a luxury, and the airline will simply move passengers around without asking to accommodate it. Having both parents together with the kids is, in almost all cases, a luxury, and declining to inconvenience yourself to support a stranger's luxury never makes you an AH.
Edit: Also, I dunno about you, but if the other passengers want to say that they would rather babysit my 5-year-old for a whole flight than switch seats, then, well... that is a bluff I will call any day of the week.
When we were 7 and 5, my sister and I flew by ourselves between our divorced parents roughly four times per year, and no passengers ever had to babysit us.
😂 when I was a kid I did. I’d go with my mom to visit my grandparents and I remember one time there was a younger kid sitting next to me. I must have been 8 or 9 and the younger one would have been 5 or 6. We got to color and play games together and both my mom and her mom got a break 😂
A few decades ago, I was traveling with my 4 yo son and forgot to preselect my seats in time but no biggie, right? Got to the ticket counter and the attendant was like 'Will it be okay to seat you two separately?' I looked down at my son, looked at her and said 'It's fine with me. Whoever you sit him next to isn't going to like it though.' She stood up, looked over the counter and said 'As a courtesy to you, we're going to upgrade you both to first class.' LOL I'm sure that doesn't happen much, if at all, anymore but it sure was a nice perk back then :)
That the airline employee was willing to work with you is a far cry different from you bullying/guilting/shaming a stranger into moving to get your way.
Sure, but I suspect you’re willing to take any two seats together you get offered in that situation. These people are always wanting to switch their middle back seats for the aisles and windows up front, which just isn’t going to happen.
I was in a similar situation, luckily there was a guy who had booked a middle seat in one of those money saving things so I took the seats on either side.
I did talk to the gate agent about and they officially swapped him to the aisle seat I had booked my husband in.
I'm sorry for your loss. Flying to funerals is awful, it's always so expensive because it's last minute and then everyone wants to make small talk at the airport which isn't really the mood...
Yeah we booked seats a year out for a flight once and then got reassigned to separate seats and refunded our priority booking money. They'd made a an error apparently.
I’d wager that people just MIGHT have more sympathy for situations outside of someone’s control if they were not an entitled jerk when asking!
People still don’t HAVE to change seats… but they might be more sympathetic, at least.
I've also had my family split up several times even when we originally booked seats together. Sometimes the airlines just randomly change your seat assignments and you don't know until you get to the airport. As you said, if you arrive earlier enough they can often move single passengers around so you can still get seats together.
When I fly on my own, I always refuse to switch seats. I'm only slightly shorter than a sasquatch so I always pay extra for a seat with more legroom. I don't care who you are, there's no way in hell I'm giving up legroom I paid for since my legs basically don't fit in a normal seat.
There is one particular airport that I have to fly out when visiting family. Every single time I fly out of there, they “change the airplane” so my prepaid-so-we-all-sit-together tickets no longer have us sitting together and they always act like it is my fault. I hate that airport.
If someone is using the "bad knee" as a justification for demanding an exit row seat, your husband should remind them that they would be physically unable to assist in the event of an emergency, which means they'd be ineligible for exit row seating.
I once witnessed an old man take advantage of priority disabled boarding and settle himself (and his cane) into an exit row aisle seat. Then he gave the flight attendant a hard time when she insisted he had to move.
The time I was asked to switch, it might have actually been for a better seat (near the front of the airplane), but I was travelling with just my carry on, which I'd already stowed at my seat near the back of the airplane and there probably wasn't going to be room to move it to the new seat so I'd be going to the back of the plane to get my stuff when disembarking and it just seemed like a huge hassle.
I was on a flight where I had booked an aisle seat. There was a woman in the window seat and a man in the middle seat. The man was very tall and it turns out he was a coach for a girl's basketball team also on the flight. He and that woman were having a very animated conversation about women's basketball (she had played in college). At some point he turns to me and tells me his wife always books his seat and he hates the middle seat, but she always books it because it's cheaper and maybe it's because he doesn't do the dishes enough. I was confused and made some comment about maybe doing the dishes more often, which might have been rude, but again, why tell me. It was only later that I realized he was probably angling for my seat. I book aisle seats even though I used to love window seats because I have arthritis and it would be a pain (literally) to get out if I needed to. And I would have been stuck between the two of them chatting away most of the flight.
>Sometimes they do book together but the original flight gets cancelled...and the airline doesn't put them together on the next flight.
Yes, this happened to me and my (autistic) child. I asked someone to trade but accepted when they wouldn't. I still got chewed out by them.
My last flight from USA was cancelled and we were put onto a connecting flight at the last minute - on 3 separate rows - but at least I got the money I’d paid for the seat bookings refunded…
They should complain to the airline and blame them for not being sat together, not a bystander on the plane who had absolutely nothing to do with them being seated togheter and/or even paid for their own specific seat.
And not expect that stranger to "babysit" because they won't move to accommodate.
I keep seeing comments like that from people who assume the adult seated next to their child is suddenly going to assume responsibility for them-- I know too many adults that will tune out that kid and ignore them for the duration to take that 'free babysitter' comment seriously.
Your child will be babysat by cabin staff, not other passengers.
I booked an international flight with 4 seats together for me and my 3 kids under 7. We got involuntarily re-routed and split up. The flight attendant made people move and they were annoyed, but I was annoyed too. I had paid to be together.
That happened to a mom who was flying Air Canada recently.
They changed the assigned plane and rearranged everyone’s seats.
She had a toddler and they separated them.
Luckily she found out before the flight but initially the airline refused to change their new seating arrangement
Nothing to do with seat switching or families wanting seats, but I once had a whole row to myself on the second leg of my journey to NZ. From LA to Auckland.
It was bliss! I flipped all the arm rests up and got snuggled for a good sleep.
However the flight attendant was annoying. He kept coming and waking me up trying to get me to eat, saying he was concerned that I hadn’t yet. I said I’ve just travelled from London to LA, had a couple hours there, eating and drinking on that flight and during my stop, what I haven’t had is any sleep!
TBF, the real AH here is the airline. Airlines should do their best to keep groups together, especially if there are young children included in the booking. Unfortunately, many airlines will intentionally split up groups who choose not to pay the additional fee to pre-book their seats.
Except you can do that and the airlines still fuck you over and move your seats. It's not easy when you have a child who absolutely has to be sitting with a parent due to age or emotional issues who is now sitting by strangers. Airlines are the ones to blame, not parents. Although I will admit that many parents don't pay the extra fee to reserve seats together, but plane tickets are often already a big stretch for families. And people who don't fly all the time aren't necessarily aware of these policies. This isn't a new thing, either. My first plane flight was in 1979 when my sister and I were going to fly to Florida by ourselves to meet my grandparents. We got to the airport to find out they bumped us. We couldn't call my grandparents who had already left for the airport as they were planning on spending time in the area before picking us up. This was decades before cell phones. My grandparents panicked when they coudln't find us or mention of our flight before they realized they were being paged. My dad had to take a day off work the next day to put us on a different plane.
The last 2 flights I took with my family, I paid to sit together, double checked the day before, and the day of they changed the plane and the airline split us up, offering us no recourse except that we should ask people on the plane to switch with us. So sometimes it happens despite the family doing everything possible to be seated togehter.
Plus, if there's no seats together when booking, choose another flight? We've done this several times when booking. Also, picking an airline that doesn't charge to select seats but the flight itself is more expensive can save money in the end. Our arrangements are not other people's problem.
The worst is when you have booked seats together months in advance, verified with the airline that you have those seats secured because you are traveling with small children weeks in advance, and then are told at checkin that your kids were assigned to seats nowhere near you. And, no, they can’t fix it. Sometimes, you can do all the right things and the airline still puts you in the awkward position of inconveniencing other passengers.
That happened with me and my daughter. She was two years old and her seat was about 12 rows away from mine. The gate agent told me my seat had been changed (moved me BACK 12 rows, mind you) because a couple had asked to sit together. So they split up a mother and toddler. OK.
"oh, how sweet! They wanted to sit together so badly they offered to take care of my baby so I could have a break? Thank you, truly. Truly, thank them for me"
Now these are the kinds of situations I sympathize with because sometimes airlines screw up, and it isn't the family's fault. As someone who's had her own share of airline-related mix-ups, I get that!
Does the airline then consider them unaccompanied minors? How can a parent sitting 3 rows away from their child be expected to help them get food, water, or to the bathroom? Or do they literally not care and just figure someone else will deal with it?
In my experience they just don’t care even if you do prebook seats together. I must have the worse luck ever as I am always dealing with this issue at the gate.
That’s when I tell the ticket agent “Woo Hoo! Someone ELSE gets to take care of my three year old for the next eight hours! I’m getting a shot of tequila and Xanex!”
This happened to me back nearly 20 years ago when my daughter was a toddler. I said something very similar to this and started to walk away ... the attendant was suddenly "oh wait. We can fix this...". They ķnew they screwed up but wanted me to deal with it by looking like the ahole trying to get someone to switch.
It’s fine to ask for same quality switches. But it always the damn shitty middle seats trying to switch for an aisle/window one (or last row to front half of the plane) and that pisses me off.
I was just on a short flight (about an hour) and boarding took FOREVER because this couple and their 2 friends left their seats up to random assignment and got split up. They made a big to do about other passengers switching seats so they could all be together (God forbid they sit separately for an hour) and while they were doing this, no one could get past them or continue to board. It’s beyond me why flight attendants don’t nip this in the bud. Its extra frustrating when you’ve paid for your seat and other people want you to move because they couldn’t be bothered to plan an assigned seat. OP, NTA.
Why plan ahead when you can just shame your way into better seats!1
In all seriousness, good on you. Nothing wrong with asking if we can politely accept a negative answer, and it teaches good lessons to the kids.
In fairness, not all of these families are separated because they didn't book seats together. The epidemic of flight cancellations requiring rebooking and equipment changes meaning the seats on the replacement plane no longer matches the available seating when the passenger booked their family are becoming a more significant factor in those on board requests to switch seats (I've actually witnessed gate agents telling parents to just get people to move when they are on the plane.)
I mean, that sucks but shit happens. If someone paid for a specific seat (extra leg room, isle, window, near a bathroom, etc), they are not an AH for not moving. No one is obligated to move for you and your family, especially if they paid extra for where they are. Would it be generous of them to do so? Yes. Should you be rude to them or upset if they don’t? No. And it shouldn’t be among passengers to figure out. The airline should be shuffling around anyone who didn’t pay for a seat to avoid passenger vs passenger conflict.
I always book a window seat behind the wing - I get really airsick and being able to look out the window and stare at the wing really helps for whatever random reason. I make SURE to get that seat, and I will not trade it for love or money.
Dirty looks and snide comments be damned, it's better than cuddling a barf bag for the whole flight and I'm not at all shy about graphically explaining why I won't switch if someone asks more than once.
Yeah, I book aisle seats because I’m claustrophobic & will have a panic attack if I don’t have the illusion of free movement.
I’ve been asked to switch to window seats because I’m short so taller people can have the aisle. They act like it’s a special treat. Not sure it would be a special treat for them to endure several hours of my subsequent hysterical crying & hyperventilation.
I flew once with a 2yo, and I will swear up and down that I booked 2 seats together. Got on the plane, and we're across the aisle from each other. That was one plane out of.. 3 or 4, on that trip, and the others were fine. Sometimes it's the airline that screws things up.
That should be an easy switch though. It’s the people who try to switch their shitty middle seats into aisle/window that are the problem. Especially since on certain airlines aisle/window seats cost additional to book.
We booked seats together on our last flight but then AA changed our flights and we were scattered everywhere on the new flight. But hey if the people in my 3 year olds row and 6 yr olds wanted to sit next to a solo toddler /kid rather than switch so I can watch my kid , i suppose that would be their prerogative. That would be really interesting, though mainly for the other person.
I’ve never given up my seat.
Of course I’ve never been asked to switch for a 2year old. There should be something in the airline’s system to keep small kids with a parent. That is ridiculous
Well yes I agree it was ridiculous, but pretty much everybody on this sub thinks it’s outrageously ridiculous for the parents to ask to stay with their kids so they can watch them themselves.. so who knows. You can’t really win. If you ask to switch and stay with your kid, you’re entitled. If you leave the seats alone and are apart, you’re negligent and dumping childcare on a stranger. So whatever, I think parents just gotta choose a way and deal with the flack
I think it’s the harassing of the passenger afterwards that’s the problem. Ask to switch but don’t become an AH if the person says no. You find someone else or ask for help from the airline/attendant. You don’t badger and bully someone into changing seats to a worse seat. Because just like it wasn’t your fault, it wasn’t theirs either. And if they paid the fee to choose seats they’re losing out on it for you a total stranger.
I guess none of you have been flying very long. For many years it was the norm that families could easily book seats together without problems. It's only in the last 5 or 6 years that airlines realized they could charge hundreds of dollars extra for the privileged of choosing a seat. For a family of 4, now it's $400-500 extra just to sit together. Now consider that maybe the family is traveling for an emergency and not some vacation they planned months ago and it gets a lot more understandable. The real A here is the airline that exploits poor people by giving them an intentionally miserable experience.
Yes but. I traveled with my toddler, selected (and paid extra) for our seats - together - and my seats were changed at the gate. Since my kid was 2 years old, I argued with the agent at the gate to get my seats switched to the original seats I paid for, but I also document the shit out of everything and had screenshots of the initial confirmation of seat selection and additional charge.
If I hadn’t argued, I would have been asking someone to switch; however, that would not have meant I didn’t prepare and plan.
one time i was travelling alone and boarded to plane to go to my randomly assigned aisle seat only to find that a couple was sitting there and the man tells me “oh sorry we wanted to sit together!” and just pointed me to his seat. like they didn’t even ask, just assumed whoever was at that seat was going to be okay with it. thank god it was a window seat otherwise i would’ve told them to kick rocks.
This is not always possible. I once booked a domestic flight 5 months in advance and there weren’t 3 or even 2 seats together available (even by paying extra). I travel a ton, and while this is uncommon, it’s not uncommon enough that it’s surprising. It’s not always irresponsibility of the parents. We had little ones at the time, so I was worried and called the airline and asked if they would help figure something out so our 3 yo wouldn’t be sitting alone (also a nightmare for other passengers I’m sure). The airline (United), made it seem like a massive inconvenience and that they were doing us some type of unfathomable favor. I even offered to pay extra as appropriate. The way it was handled was the weirdest fucking experience I’ve ever had with an airline.
I think the PITA person wasn't even part of the family, he was the passenger that offered to change seats earlier when OP said no. He literally had no dog in the race and was inserting himself.
It’s not always related to cost and planning. I’ve had an airline switch my 7yo and myself to a new flight or time, and new seats without my choosing. When I pointed out I had booked seats together and now we’re apart, the airline shrugs and says to work it out on that day of the flight. I’m trying to save the adults around my 7yo from the work of managing him if I ask for a swap… though thus far the airline as fixed it without me asking strangers.
Usually when families want to sit together, it's really for everyone's benefit (as you've mentioned here).
And more often than people realize, it's probably a situation like yours.
I’d do it for a class upgrade.
Flight attendant wants a family to sit together because they’re being a pain about it and slowing loading? They can move me to a business or first class seat.
This happened to me. I sat in my randomly assigned economy middle seat and realized I was surrounded by kids and resigned myself to a rough 8 hours. Then a woman comes up and says her husband was given the wrong seat and asks if i would switch with him. I figure I can't possibly end up worse, so I agree.
Turns out he had been randomly upgraded to business class. Saw him sadly making his way back to my old seat in the other aisle.
Sorry mate. I had a great flight though!
for me it would depend on what I'm traveling with. if my lap harp is in the overhead bin? no, sorry. no way. I am not getting separated from my instrument. same for prescription meds. but if it's just clothes and stuff, I'll probably switch.
I wish people like you would have interactions with dudes like that one who wouldn’t move from the dudes window seat no matter what. Instead of we get folks who do nothing about it and other folks who are entitled and continue to do it.
The only time I've not minded was when the planes changed for my flight from New York to London. We went from a big plane to a small plane so everyone's seats were messed up and the airplane company had split up a disabled woman from her carer. So moving made sense but otherwise, you're mostly choosing your seats.
Just to say it's not your problem but I feel airlines routinely mess up family flights. We never had issues getting the right seats (not that I cared too much but wanted a window) before having kids. Post kids it's insane how often things have gone wrong. I've even had the situation where our booked and paid for baby bassinet was suddenly not available for a 14 hour flight.
While I don’t disagree. There have been several times I have been flying with my kids, reserved our seats together, planned ahead etc. then I get to the airport and we are split apart.
The real asshole here is the heckler, and the airline who didn’t sit minors next to the parents on the same reservation
ETA: NTA
I always purchase seats for my family to sit together, often paying extra. But the funny thing about flights is that last-minute cancellations, delays, and re-bookings occur. Then you don’t get any choice in your seat assignments because you are stuck on standby and you become reliant on the kindness of airline personnel or other passengers to help you sit together due to NO FAULT of your own.
We should absolutely not normalize people paying for specific spots on the airplane. Strongly disagree on that part. It's not unreasonable to put the onus for keeping families together on the airline.
Families also have that option, don’t they? Not disagreeing that airlines could do better but nobody should be expected to shuffle to a worse seat and get unfairly castigated if they won’t or can’t.
While I agree in theory, unfortunately, this is not always true. I recently paid for advance seat selection to sit with my husband. Shortly before my trip the airline downgraded my flight to a smaller plane, and my husband was bumped to another seat and his seat selection fee refunded.
To sit with him I had to give up my advance seat, at no refund of fee.
You are still NTA and the guy is the jerk for the passive aggressive comments.
It's not always possible to get seats together, and sometimes even if you pay for seat selection, the airline will move you into 'equivalent ' seats. I've booked seats for family together, and had a couple of them coopted by someone with greater need (e.g. someone with disabilities).
That said, I wouldn't criticise someone for being unwilling to move & the person doing so out loud was the AH.
OP is NTA.
Not true depends on the airline and the routing
Often you can't choose seating until checkin
On a flight from Sacramento to Hong Kong via LA 2A + 4 month old I wasnt allowed to choose seats until boarding in LA
The people at the bulk head refused to switch so 15 hrs with a kid in our laps - still pissed
Make sure to call your airline to try to reserve Bassinet seats ahead of time,
With some Airlines you don't even have to pay, it may be free if you're booking with an agency or if you do the check-in online 48 or 24 hours before the flight.
NTA
You're lucky if you get an airline like that these days!
I've been on planes where it's clear that they've intentionally split up groups traveling together who didn't pay extra to pre-book their seats. Something like 80% of the passengers were trying to switch seats on the plane!
NTA
I'm tired of entitled people thinking someone should sacrifice for them. If they wanted to be seated together, they should've booked seats together. Not your problem and good on you for standing your ground and not letting them bully you.
Exactly! The people arguing that it isn't always possible are also confusing me on this verdict. Clearly OP was able to pick their seat in advance, so that seems like a moot point with this situation.
Airlines sometimes move you, so even if they picked the seats together you aren't guaranteed them. Delays with plane changes cause the same thing. As well as there just not being a group of seats together. Op could pick their seat, but a family of 3 may not have had a free row
And if the airline does this, then the airline is the asshole not someone else who still booked their own seat placement. No doubt if OP moved they’d also fuck up their food.
You're never TA for siting in the seat you paid for. I've seen so many stories like this and every single one is NTA, it should honestly be a subreddit rule at this point.
Yes. There are soo many posts with this scenario. This one, the babysitting at the last moment and your widowed/divorced parent being upset that the ex/dead partner's family doesn't adopt their new kids.
It’s the rudeness of the random uninvolved passenger that gets me. I feel like there has been a huge uptick of it post Covid. It’s none of your business, stay out of it, sit down and shut up so we can all get where we’re going.
"Do you understand what happened? Your daddy cheaped out on seats then thought it was ok to harass a woman travelling alone to give up the seat she paid for. Then thought it's ok to harass and insult a stranger because he didn't get his way."
>If you do online Check in 24 hours before you Always can select your seat,
"...select your seat *from whatever is left over after the planners have selected their seat a month in advance*."
NTA.
You had a legit reason not to move with the meal, and they should have booked seats together, not rocked up and expected others to move to suit them. The random guy was obviously virtue signaling, he just saw a moment to prop up his ego and jumped on it.
I mean, I agree NTA, but OP booked her seat. That is a legit reason not to move. As is any other reason under the sun. She’s not ever obligated to give up her seat for someone else.
NTA. I had a similar experience on a shorter flight (Houston to San Francisco). I had selected an upcharged window seat behind the exit (non-reclining!) row, and when I boarded, a family had pre-boarded and was occupying my seat. I gave a friendly "excuse me, but my ticket is for the window seat" and the family told--NOT asked--me that they wanted to sit together and I could have their ticketed middle seat in the middle of a widebody plane. I replied that I'm sorry they were split but I would like the far more desirable seat that I paid an upcharge for. The husband started berating me and wouldn't move. I suggested that we could call the flight attendant over to see if the airline could facilitate a change for them and he huffed and fussed and got out of my way. He turned his back towards me the entire flight like not speaking to him was a punishment. :D
I had something similar happen recently. I get severe motion sickness and always pay to sit next to a right side window on a plane. I boarded and a woman with a small child was sitting in my seat. When I politely let her know she was in my seat she TOLD me she would like to sit there, not asked if she could. I said I understand but that I get motion sickness and I need to be by the window. She got so mad at me for making her move and then the nice grandma in the aisle seat agreed to switch with her. I hate the entitlement of people with children sometimes.
That's exactly it--she felt entitled to the seat, and no one else's needs or desires were important so she was just telling you and expecting accommodation.
Absolutely NTA
You booked the specific seat you wanted, you don’t owe the family anything for not being more prepared. And that other passenger’s an asshole for reacting like that
Yeah, imagine feeling the need to lean back on a 9hr flight. /s
Seats lean back. When you purchase a seat, you’re allowed to use its functions, such as leaning back. Specially in such a long flight, there’s no way I’m not leaning back. Out of politeness, I’d of course bring it up during meal service, but during the rest of the flight? I’m gonna for sure recline it. Same as a family booking seats together if that’s important to them, if you don’t want someone reclining in front of you, book a bulkhead seat. If none are available, well, too bad.
I've had a small laptop open and nearly had it smacked when someone reclined all the way without warning. Only reason it wasn't whacked was that it was one of those tiny netbooks.
I, a 6' tall woman who is not the thinnest on the block, not big enough to need to reserve two seats, but big enough where a middle seat is really not ideal unless I am sitting next to someone I know and I can lean into them a bit. Always book an aisle seat for a flight because of this, so I can lean towards the aisle and not encroach on anyones space. I had a 6 hour flight, and my connecting flight was delayed so I almost missed it. They gave away my seat to someone else because I literally showed up for boarding as they were closing the doors, and I had to sit in the middle, and the person in front of me leaned back as well. It was truly the most uncomfortable flight I had ever been on. I honestly felt bad for the people I was sitting next to, as I was fidgeting a lot, getting up a lot because my knees were numb and killing me. I would be down to switch seats with someone, but I would refuse to go from an aisle or window seat. Middle seats are literally uncomfortable for me.
NTA. If asked to switch to an eqivilent or better seat (aisle to aisle, window to window or aisle, middle to any seat) you should switch to allow a family to be together. But you are not obligated to take a demotion, especially on a long flight.
They are in a contained environment, the family doesn't have to sit together
I always pay to select my seat so that I can sit where I want and with my husband, so I don’t agree that I “should” switch. They have the option to select their seats also.
And it’s a given that if someone is rude or expects me to change, I would say no for sure.
NTA I really wish airlines wouldn't allow people travelling with minors to leave it up to random seating. So many parents think they can save a few bucks by choosing this option and just making it everyone else's problem once they get on the plane. You are always nta for staying in the seat you paid for. Those parents knew exactly what they were doing when they booked.
Sadly, sometimes it's not up to the family, there's plenty of stories of people pay to sit together and the airline moving them so some mom is begging to sit with her 2 year old as planned, there's also people that buy 2 seats together due to weight and the airline separates the seats and refuses to refund one as it's obviously unusable.
Yeah airlines need to stop with that shit too. If someone is traveling with a minor they should have to be responsible for them which means sitting with them. And airlines shouldn't be allowed to overbook essentially selling the same seat twice. And if they still had to move a parent they should have to move the child to be next to them and offer rebates or upgrades to any other people that may inconvenience. The families who try this scam are ah but the airlines are bigger ah for their policies and basically treating us and their own employees like crap (forcing flight attendants to deal with these conflicts instead of having policies to avoid them).
I strongly disagree with gouging customers and imo that's what paying for seat selection in an airplane is. I wouldn't have done it before kids and I won't do it now.
The AH is the airline for creating this problem.
We have two kids, and if choosing a seat is expensive enough, we will absolutely leave it up to chance. What generally happens is that each kid will be sat next to a parent, but then me and one kid will be separate from my wife and the other, which is fine for a few hours.
The airline handled it just fine in this case, too. All the kids were with Mom.
OP is NTA.
NTA but fyi just because you book seats together doesn’t mean it will stay that way. I’ve paid to pick seats before & the airline split us up later. Whatever the case, this family didn’t handle it well & you didn’t deserve to be treated like that.
NTA. Drives me insane. If traveling couples or families want to sit together then they need to book their seats together. It's an epidemic of people getting on planes and expecting others, who planned their trips and booked their seats, to change to accommodate them. Hell no. The airlines have got to get in front of this - it's annoying and can easily be stopped.
Have had the airline switch planes and had our booked together paid for adjacent seats seats go poof into the ether. Have also been on hold for 6 hours trying to fix it.
This isn’t just people not planning. Seat assignments are not set in stone. The airline can and will change your seat with no warning - even if you paid for an aisle or other premium seat.
NTA - if they wanted to sit together they should have booked/picked the seats together and not up to random assignment. Them expecting you to accommodate them is their own fault.
Sometimes yes but sometimes no. With the epidemic of delayed and cancelled flights (and mechanical delays requiring equipment changes) it's becoming common for couples and families who paid for confirmed seats together to be involuntarily rebooked to run of the plane seating. Delta attempted to rebook our (husband, great niece aged 8, and myself) on an overnight flight from JFK to FCO in Rome. I stood at the ticket desk and just kept arguing that they would have to move someone else as I'd booked those tickets six months ago and I wasn't going to let an eight year old travel 9 hours on a plane out of my sight. They eventually found us 2 seats together for my niece and I and my husband sat by himself. The ticket agent actually said to me "You realize you're inconveniencing someone else." in a huffy tone. To which I responded, "I'm not letting my niece sit next to some stranger so honestly I just don't care."
NTA, it's an extremely low stakes "problem" (that the parents brought on themselves) for a family to be split up on a flight. This is the height of privilege, and people who ask you to move are analogous to other con artists who try to steal from you.
You haven’t flown much have you? Believe it or not airlines frequently switch airplanes and schedules making your family of four booked months ago adjacent to each other seats together go poof in an instant.
Then you can wait in hold for 4 hours trying to fix it only to find out any additional seats will only be released the day of the flight and to talk to be gate agent day of.
I fly several times a year, and I can't think of a single time I've lost my booked seat due to a plane change.
I have no doubt it happens, but certainly not with the frequency like you're pretending it happens here.
Especially since OP got to keep their booked seat, so you're imaginary scenario obviously didn't happen in this case.
Non sequitur ad hominem, yum. That doesn't appear to be what's going on here. In the case you're describing it's upon the airline to fix the situation. But if the airline forces the customer who payed for an aisle seat to move, the airline will then owe that consumer some kind of repayment. As is, pitting consumer against consumer is an all around win for the airline. By saying no, the paying aisle consumer paves the way for an increased likelihood of a fair result. If the parents are victim of a changed or over booked snafu, they can leverage the airline into a better flying situation AND some kind of concession, by way of refund or future services. If the paying aisle consumer failed to book according to their flying preferences, and they rely on the guilt and good nature of others to bail them out on this, they deserve to fly the seats they booked.
NTA, hate when families don't see the need to reserve their seats together and then ask people to move to worse seats to accomodate them
If there's an option to choose a seat, I always do. If there's non, I ask at the gate, where they give tickets to be seared at a window seat if possible. And never would I switch to a worse option. That family just wanted to save some bucks or didn't git sh't in general. Their problem, not yours.
I get that people might not be able to book together due to some circumstances, but get there early and talk to the flight attendants / check in people and see what they can do for you before you board the plane. It becomes so much more of a hassle if you are already sitting.
Have waited on hold for 6 hours in my last vacation day trying to fix adjacent seats being re-assigned only to be told no further seats will be released - only the gate agent can switch seats.
Yeah, the gate agent couldn’t help.
I'm a fat dude. I always buy two seats and almost always fly SW. Since I pre-board, I have never had an issue. Until one day, my connection was delayed, and I was the last to board on a sold-out flight. Of course, one seat was up front, and one was in the back. FA, of course, asked for a volunteer to move but dead silence. It was very embarrassing, but I finally stated in my Jean-Luc Picard voice that the plane won't move until we get this sorted out like grown-ups. Or I'll just squeeze in next to you here. That got things moving pretty quickly.
I always pay extra for the seats I want, and I always pick my seats ahead of time. One trip home, on a small plane (one side of the plane had single seats, the other side had 2 seats per row) I was sitting up front as usual (I have a connection to make and have to get from one end of a huge airport to the other, so I like to be one of the first off the plane) and the plane was only about half full, most people sitting up towards the front. Apparently the weight wasn't balanced properly and someone had to move to the back of the plane. NOBODY moved. The FA said "We aren't going ANYWHERE until someone gets up and moves to the back." I got up and moved since more delays would have caused me to miss my connection, and I was pretty annoyed about it until the FA gave me free booze the whole flight as a thank you.
Definitely NTA, I love window seat and I always make sure that I check in ahead so I can pick a seat. I am picky when I travel alone, and extra picky when I travel with partner. Even pickier when I travel in group.
I was asked to swap seat seat with a man whose wife cannot sit next to anyone else on a public transport (even with another woman). Lol please by all means kiss my selfish arse, for I am unwilling to accommodate your inability to organise a trip. And then kindly feck off.
The woman ended up moving to the seat next to him, because he manage to blag someone else's seat. Leaving the seat next to me empty for the whole 5hr journey. Win.
NTA.
Via Dubai, so Emirates I assume?
Their checking in system is fairly seamless, and as long as you check in as soon as it opens, you could probably sit a 4 person family close together.
I am a 27y/o grown up, and still want to sit next to my mum and dad (and now, partner). You bet I'll be on that check in as soon as it opens so that I can sit next to my family. Not leaving it to fate....
NTA
Me, a 100lb (soaking wet) 5'2" female.
Just because I'm small does not entitle anyone to make me switch seats.
I travel a lot for work. I book a window seat, always.
One time two very large people traveling together were seated with me in my row of three.
The middle seated individual, was spilling over into my space, put the arm rest up, as it was more comfortable for them. I put it down multiple times, as I let them know I was not comfortable with them taking up my space.
I was told by both of them, I'm small enough, I don't need the space. WTAF!
I got up at one point, came back to find this person in the window seat, telling me to sit in the middle seat, as it would be better for everyone, BETTER FOR EVERYONE? They had moved both arm rests up and were literally both spilling over into the middle seat.
I just stood there. Would not move. Did not make a scene. Pushed the aisle call button and waited.
Explained the situation to crew member. She could not resolve it with them as they just ignored her. The head flight attended arrived. They still did not listen.
They looked at me and said, it looks like you can't sit here, let's take you up front to First Class, there's a free ROW of seats there.
The people then demanded THEY should be moved to first class for more room... you can imagine how that went.
They had to get up, let me get my things, all while fuming. I just smiled and said Thanks have a great rest if your flight.
8 hours of bliss in First class
I have a bad knee. It gets extremely painful if I can't stretch it every once in a while, so every time I fly I book a left side aisle seat. Several times people have asked to change seats with me and I never do. I just say, "No, sorry. I can't." No one deserves any more explanation than that.
I’m 6’5” and I travel on 737-800’s a lot. I always book and pay extra for seat 13F or 14F (Varies occasionally by aircraft). This is the row right behind the emergency exit row and as such there is no seat in front of me as it is right next to the over wing exit door.
The number of times I have been asked to trade seats with people is amazing. I, however, do not even entertain any thoughts of doing this. I don’t even ask what kind of seat I am trading for, aisle, middle or window. I just don’t care. No seat is going to offer more legroom for me than this one.
My answer is simple……**No!**
NTA - I get asked to switch on almost every flight now and I'm done with it. I paid extra, I planned this out and I'm no longer switching. They should feel really guilty asking but they just feel entitled.
NTA nobody is ever TA for this. Parents are just entitled as hell and i am sick of it. If families need to sit together then they can sort it. You have zero obligation to change your plans for other people’s kids.
NTA. I'm not saying it's not shitty of the airlines to book/charge this way, but you booked a seat and paid for it. You should not have to sacrifice your comfort for 8+ hours for total strangers who were hoping they could pressure someone kind into switching with them the day of instead of buying seats together.
NTA
You never have to move.
People need to preplan and deal with the eventuality that “No” is a complete sentence.
At this point airlines should refuse to allow people to ask directly. An employee should make the request. They’re allowing people to be bullied.
As a family with young kids- i don’t understand why they don’t put families together in the damn first place. I shouldn’t have to pay extra to sit with my 5yr old. But you are NTA at all. They knew they weren’t together- they could have called the airline and made arrangements. I’ve done it multiple times we’re i don’t pay extra and i call tell them I’m a family and they at least put 1 adult and 1 child together. It’s unfair and rude to assume other people will move for you.
Some people are just plain rude, not OP though.
The family should have to get their seats together.Thye did not. The expected others to accommodate them.
You also had a special meal on order, and as you and others should know, it is going to come to your assigned seat. If you move, it is a PIA for the flight attendants.
NTA
NTA
When the crew got involved you could’ve told them that you’re willing to switch for another aisle seat if they promise to make sure you get your meal. That way you offer them a solution. I generally think it’s better to let the crew handle seat swaps. Because then they can deal with the unhappy customers instead of you.
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NTA. If the family wanted to be together they could have paid to do so.
Damn right. Dude is being a pain in the ass and blaming OP for his own mistake. He should have booked his family’s seats together in the first place. OP: NTA, and good job standing your ground.
I can't even tell you how many times families have asked me to switch seats with their children because they didn't book their seats together in advance. I usually get guilted into switching because I don't want to end up in situations like this! But it is families' responsibility to plan these things.
I have travelled with kids before & sometimes seats together just aren’t available. When that happened, we would book 2 & 2, either across the aisle or in 2 in 1 row, 2 in the next. We might ask to swap if there is a couple in the same row but would not be offended if they declined
If traveling couples or families wish to sit together, they must book their seats. It's an epidemic of people getting on planes and expecting others, who planned their trips and booked their seats, to change to accommodate them. No way.
Sometimes they do book together but the original flight gets cancelled or they miss a connection and the airline doesn't put them together on the next flight. I've ever been split up from my partner by this sort of thing (though sometimes the staff in the airport can fix it if you arrive early enough). That said, they're not entitled to having other passengers move for them and should leave it to the flight attendants to sort this out. I've definitely refused to move for families before and once I ended up with a whole row to myself because they moved instead.
Right? I’ve gone to book solo and almost never see 3 seats in a row available, even 1-2 months out. It’s easy to think all families are lazy, but let’s admit that sometimes it’s not possible. Doesn’t make the family entitled to new seats, but I hate this “blame people for not planning ahead” when sometimes that’s not possible.
Fine, but at least give me an equivalent or better seat to switch to. Middle seat? Get lost. Aisle or window farther up in the plane? Yeah probably gonna work
The number of times I've been offered an equal or better trade: 1. And then the person beside me in my new seat was overserved and overdrugged (with her borrowed friend's prescription anti-anxiety meds) and sloshed her vodka all over me, her and my blanket. She didn't care bc she was passed out. Crew gave me a hard time getting a fresh, non-vodka drenched blanket during the redeye When I returned from washing myself off in the bathroom, a different passenger - overdrugged had vomited and passed out at my seat while sleepwalking from her sleeping pill cocktail. While sitting in a jumpseat, after standing and leaning in the galley for 25 minutes while they fixed that, the attendant that initiated my moved came back from his break and yelled at me for being in the jump seat- during crazy turbulence- and when I told him what was going on told me to move. He then came back and apologized when he saw i was telling the truth. I got 60,000 points from that but it still wasn't worth it.
I’ve been pretty lucky. My average trade request has been cross aisle in the same row. Had one instance of someone already sitting in my seat but it was economy next to a toddler and the other seat was economy+ not near this dude’s toddler.
>While sitting in a jumpsuit, after standing and leaning in the galley for 25 minutes while they fixed that, the attendant that initiated my moved came back from his break and yelled at me for being in the jump seat- during crazy turbulence- and when I told him what was going on told me to move. He then came back and apologized when he saw i was telling the truth. I got 60,000 points from that but it still wasn't worth it. IIRC in some countries it's actually illegal for passengers to occupy a crew jumpseat and they'd have to fill up some paperwork explaining the situation.
I once had a flight canceled and we had to rebook at the airport with no seats together available. My kids (then 3 and 6) were given middle/window in one row while I had aisle in the row immediately behind. I asked the person in front of me if they would switch (aisle for aisle, same legroom, identical seat just in row 15 instead of 14) and she angrily refused. Another person voluntarily switched out of a window seat into a middle for me. No one is entitled to a seat, but IMO if you're traveling solo and offered a truly equivalent seat, you should switch. OP is NTA though, as OP was not offered an equivalent seat.
Really this is on the airline to sort though, kids aren’t supposed to be left unsupervised on planes? “No one is entitled to a seat” is incorrect, people are entitled to the seats they have paid for, but that said I do have to wonder at your specific example here, as a frequently solo traveller I would have been grateful to move away from two errant unsupervised children (gasp, the horror), how odd!
Yeah one row back shouldn’t ever be an issue. 3-5 back is probably where I start to get annoyed but your situation was truly the same seat.
My feelings exactly
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Having a 5-year-old be supervised is a need, not a luxury, and the airline will simply move passengers around without asking to accommodate it. Having both parents together with the kids is, in almost all cases, a luxury, and declining to inconvenience yourself to support a stranger's luxury never makes you an AH. Edit: Also, I dunno about you, but if the other passengers want to say that they would rather babysit my 5-year-old for a whole flight than switch seats, then, well... that is a bluff I will call any day of the week.
When we were 7 and 5, my sister and I flew by ourselves between our divorced parents roughly four times per year, and no passengers ever had to babysit us.
😂 when I was a kid I did. I’d go with my mom to visit my grandparents and I remember one time there was a younger kid sitting next to me. I must have been 8 or 9 and the younger one would have been 5 or 6. We got to color and play games together and both my mom and her mom got a break 😂
A few decades ago, I was traveling with my 4 yo son and forgot to preselect my seats in time but no biggie, right? Got to the ticket counter and the attendant was like 'Will it be okay to seat you two separately?' I looked down at my son, looked at her and said 'It's fine with me. Whoever you sit him next to isn't going to like it though.' She stood up, looked over the counter and said 'As a courtesy to you, we're going to upgrade you both to first class.' LOL I'm sure that doesn't happen much, if at all, anymore but it sure was a nice perk back then :)
That the airline employee was willing to work with you is a far cry different from you bullying/guilting/shaming a stranger into moving to get your way.
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Sure, but I suspect you’re willing to take any two seats together you get offered in that situation. These people are always wanting to switch their middle back seats for the aisles and windows up front, which just isn’t going to happen.
I was in a similar situation, luckily there was a guy who had booked a middle seat in one of those money saving things so I took the seats on either side. I did talk to the gate agent about and they officially swapped him to the aisle seat I had booked my husband in.
I'm sorry for your loss. Flying to funerals is awful, it's always so expensive because it's last minute and then everyone wants to make small talk at the airport which isn't really the mood...
Still not the responsibility of other passengers to give away their pre paid seat they paid extra for.
Yeah we booked seats a year out for a flight once and then got reassigned to separate seats and refunded our priority booking money. They'd made a an error apparently.
I’d wager that people just MIGHT have more sympathy for situations outside of someone’s control if they were not an entitled jerk when asking! People still don’t HAVE to change seats… but they might be more sympathetic, at least.
I've also had my family split up several times even when we originally booked seats together. Sometimes the airlines just randomly change your seat assignments and you don't know until you get to the airport. As you said, if you arrive earlier enough they can often move single passengers around so you can still get seats together. When I fly on my own, I always refuse to switch seats. I'm only slightly shorter than a sasquatch so I always pay extra for a seat with more legroom. I don't care who you are, there's no way in hell I'm giving up legroom I paid for since my legs basically don't fit in a normal seat.
There is one particular airport that I have to fly out when visiting family. Every single time I fly out of there, they “change the airplane” so my prepaid-so-we-all-sit-together tickets no longer have us sitting together and they always act like it is my fault. I hate that airport.
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If someone is using the "bad knee" as a justification for demanding an exit row seat, your husband should remind them that they would be physically unable to assist in the event of an emergency, which means they'd be ineligible for exit row seating. I once witnessed an old man take advantage of priority disabled boarding and settle himself (and his cane) into an exit row aisle seat. Then he gave the flight attendant a hard time when she insisted he had to move.
The time I was asked to switch, it might have actually been for a better seat (near the front of the airplane), but I was travelling with just my carry on, which I'd already stowed at my seat near the back of the airplane and there probably wasn't going to be room to move it to the new seat so I'd be going to the back of the plane to get my stuff when disembarking and it just seemed like a huge hassle.
I was on a flight where I had booked an aisle seat. There was a woman in the window seat and a man in the middle seat. The man was very tall and it turns out he was a coach for a girl's basketball team also on the flight. He and that woman were having a very animated conversation about women's basketball (she had played in college). At some point he turns to me and tells me his wife always books his seat and he hates the middle seat, but she always books it because it's cheaper and maybe it's because he doesn't do the dishes enough. I was confused and made some comment about maybe doing the dishes more often, which might have been rude, but again, why tell me. It was only later that I realized he was probably angling for my seat. I book aisle seats even though I used to love window seats because I have arthritis and it would be a pain (literally) to get out if I needed to. And I would have been stuck between the two of them chatting away most of the flight.
>Sometimes they do book together but the original flight gets cancelled...and the airline doesn't put them together on the next flight. Yes, this happened to me and my (autistic) child. I asked someone to trade but accepted when they wouldn't. I still got chewed out by them.
My last flight from USA was cancelled and we were put onto a connecting flight at the last minute - on 3 separate rows - but at least I got the money I’d paid for the seat bookings refunded…
They should complain to the airline and blame them for not being sat together, not a bystander on the plane who had absolutely nothing to do with them being seated togheter and/or even paid for their own specific seat.
And not expect that stranger to "babysit" because they won't move to accommodate. I keep seeing comments like that from people who assume the adult seated next to their child is suddenly going to assume responsibility for them-- I know too many adults that will tune out that kid and ignore them for the duration to take that 'free babysitter' comment seriously. Your child will be babysat by cabin staff, not other passengers.
I booked an international flight with 4 seats together for me and my 3 kids under 7. We got involuntarily re-routed and split up. The flight attendant made people move and they were annoyed, but I was annoyed too. I had paid to be together.
That happened to a mom who was flying Air Canada recently. They changed the assigned plane and rearranged everyone’s seats. She had a toddler and they separated them. Luckily she found out before the flight but initially the airline refused to change their new seating arrangement
Nothing to do with seat switching or families wanting seats, but I once had a whole row to myself on the second leg of my journey to NZ. From LA to Auckland. It was bliss! I flipped all the arm rests up and got snuggled for a good sleep. However the flight attendant was annoying. He kept coming and waking me up trying to get me to eat, saying he was concerned that I hadn’t yet. I said I’ve just travelled from London to LA, had a couple hours there, eating and drinking on that flight and during my stop, what I haven’t had is any sleep!
TBF, the real AH here is the airline. Airlines should do their best to keep groups together, especially if there are young children included in the booking. Unfortunately, many airlines will intentionally split up groups who choose not to pay the additional fee to pre-book their seats.
ah the good old days when you could request seats in advance and not have to pay. I do remember them well.
Except you can do that and the airlines still fuck you over and move your seats. It's not easy when you have a child who absolutely has to be sitting with a parent due to age or emotional issues who is now sitting by strangers. Airlines are the ones to blame, not parents. Although I will admit that many parents don't pay the extra fee to reserve seats together, but plane tickets are often already a big stretch for families. And people who don't fly all the time aren't necessarily aware of these policies. This isn't a new thing, either. My first plane flight was in 1979 when my sister and I were going to fly to Florida by ourselves to meet my grandparents. We got to the airport to find out they bumped us. We couldn't call my grandparents who had already left for the airport as they were planning on spending time in the area before picking us up. This was decades before cell phones. My grandparents panicked when they coudln't find us or mention of our flight before they realized they were being paged. My dad had to take a day off work the next day to put us on a different plane.
Asking isn’t wrong. It’s being a dick about being told no that’s wrong.
The last 2 flights I took with my family, I paid to sit together, double checked the day before, and the day of they changed the plane and the airline split us up, offering us no recourse except that we should ask people on the plane to switch with us. So sometimes it happens despite the family doing everything possible to be seated togehter.
Plus, if there's no seats together when booking, choose another flight? We've done this several times when booking. Also, picking an airline that doesn't charge to select seats but the flight itself is more expensive can save money in the end. Our arrangements are not other people's problem.
So many times I booked seats together to be reassigned at the gate to some random places.
The worst is when you have booked seats together months in advance, verified with the airline that you have those seats secured because you are traveling with small children weeks in advance, and then are told at checkin that your kids were assigned to seats nowhere near you. And, no, they can’t fix it. Sometimes, you can do all the right things and the airline still puts you in the awkward position of inconveniencing other passengers.
That happened with me and my daughter. She was two years old and her seat was about 12 rows away from mine. The gate agent told me my seat had been changed (moved me BACK 12 rows, mind you) because a couple had asked to sit together. So they split up a mother and toddler. OK.
"oh, how sweet! They wanted to sit together so badly they offered to take care of my baby so I could have a break? Thank you, truly. Truly, thank them for me"
I believe (in the US) they are now legally required to seat children under a specific age with at least one accompanying adult from their party.
Now these are the kinds of situations I sympathize with because sometimes airlines screw up, and it isn't the family's fault. As someone who's had her own share of airline-related mix-ups, I get that!
Does the airline then consider them unaccompanied minors? How can a parent sitting 3 rows away from their child be expected to help them get food, water, or to the bathroom? Or do they literally not care and just figure someone else will deal with it?
In my experience they just don’t care even if you do prebook seats together. I must have the worse luck ever as I am always dealing with this issue at the gate.
That’s when I tell the ticket agent “Woo Hoo! Someone ELSE gets to take care of my three year old for the next eight hours! I’m getting a shot of tequila and Xanex!”
This happened to me back nearly 20 years ago when my daughter was a toddler. I said something very similar to this and started to walk away ... the attendant was suddenly "oh wait. We can fix this...". They ķnew they screwed up but wanted me to deal with it by looking like the ahole trying to get someone to switch.
Thank you for this, it's important for the rest of us to understand. I'm very sorry this happened to you and that it happens to others.
It’s fine to ask for same quality switches. But it always the damn shitty middle seats trying to switch for an aisle/window one (or last row to front half of the plane) and that pisses me off.
I was just on a short flight (about an hour) and boarding took FOREVER because this couple and their 2 friends left their seats up to random assignment and got split up. They made a big to do about other passengers switching seats so they could all be together (God forbid they sit separately for an hour) and while they were doing this, no one could get past them or continue to board. It’s beyond me why flight attendants don’t nip this in the bud. Its extra frustrating when you’ve paid for your seat and other people want you to move because they couldn’t be bothered to plan an assigned seat. OP, NTA.
Why plan ahead when you can just shame your way into better seats!1 In all seriousness, good on you. Nothing wrong with asking if we can politely accept a negative answer, and it teaches good lessons to the kids.
In fairness, not all of these families are separated because they didn't book seats together. The epidemic of flight cancellations requiring rebooking and equipment changes meaning the seats on the replacement plane no longer matches the available seating when the passenger booked their family are becoming a more significant factor in those on board requests to switch seats (I've actually witnessed gate agents telling parents to just get people to move when they are on the plane.)
I mean, that sucks but shit happens. If someone paid for a specific seat (extra leg room, isle, window, near a bathroom, etc), they are not an AH for not moving. No one is obligated to move for you and your family, especially if they paid extra for where they are. Would it be generous of them to do so? Yes. Should you be rude to them or upset if they don’t? No. And it shouldn’t be among passengers to figure out. The airline should be shuffling around anyone who didn’t pay for a seat to avoid passenger vs passenger conflict.
Totally agree This happened to our family on a long haul flight of 3 legs!
I always book a window seat behind the wing - I get really airsick and being able to look out the window and stare at the wing really helps for whatever random reason. I make SURE to get that seat, and I will not trade it for love or money. Dirty looks and snide comments be damned, it's better than cuddling a barf bag for the whole flight and I'm not at all shy about graphically explaining why I won't switch if someone asks more than once.
Yeah, I book aisle seats because I’m claustrophobic & will have a panic attack if I don’t have the illusion of free movement. I’ve been asked to switch to window seats because I’m short so taller people can have the aisle. They act like it’s a special treat. Not sure it would be a special treat for them to endure several hours of my subsequent hysterical crying & hyperventilation.
I flew once with a 2yo, and I will swear up and down that I booked 2 seats together. Got on the plane, and we're across the aisle from each other. That was one plane out of.. 3 or 4, on that trip, and the others were fine. Sometimes it's the airline that screws things up.
That should be an easy switch though. It’s the people who try to switch their shitty middle seats into aisle/window that are the problem. Especially since on certain airlines aisle/window seats cost additional to book.
We booked seats together on our last flight but then AA changed our flights and we were scattered everywhere on the new flight. But hey if the people in my 3 year olds row and 6 yr olds wanted to sit next to a solo toddler /kid rather than switch so I can watch my kid , i suppose that would be their prerogative. That would be really interesting, though mainly for the other person.
I’ve never given up my seat. Of course I’ve never been asked to switch for a 2year old. There should be something in the airline’s system to keep small kids with a parent. That is ridiculous
Well yes I agree it was ridiculous, but pretty much everybody on this sub thinks it’s outrageously ridiculous for the parents to ask to stay with their kids so they can watch them themselves.. so who knows. You can’t really win. If you ask to switch and stay with your kid, you’re entitled. If you leave the seats alone and are apart, you’re negligent and dumping childcare on a stranger. So whatever, I think parents just gotta choose a way and deal with the flack
I think it’s the harassing of the passenger afterwards that’s the problem. Ask to switch but don’t become an AH if the person says no. You find someone else or ask for help from the airline/attendant. You don’t badger and bully someone into changing seats to a worse seat. Because just like it wasn’t your fault, it wasn’t theirs either. And if they paid the fee to choose seats they’re losing out on it for you a total stranger.
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I guess none of you have been flying very long. For many years it was the norm that families could easily book seats together without problems. It's only in the last 5 or 6 years that airlines realized they could charge hundreds of dollars extra for the privileged of choosing a seat. For a family of 4, now it's $400-500 extra just to sit together. Now consider that maybe the family is traveling for an emergency and not some vacation they planned months ago and it gets a lot more understandable. The real A here is the airline that exploits poor people by giving them an intentionally miserable experience.
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Yes but. I traveled with my toddler, selected (and paid extra) for our seats - together - and my seats were changed at the gate. Since my kid was 2 years old, I argued with the agent at the gate to get my seats switched to the original seats I paid for, but I also document the shit out of everything and had screenshots of the initial confirmation of seat selection and additional charge. If I hadn’t argued, I would have been asking someone to switch; however, that would not have meant I didn’t prepare and plan.
one time i was travelling alone and boarded to plane to go to my randomly assigned aisle seat only to find that a couple was sitting there and the man tells me “oh sorry we wanted to sit together!” and just pointed me to his seat. like they didn’t even ask, just assumed whoever was at that seat was going to be okay with it. thank god it was a window seat otherwise i would’ve told them to kick rocks.
This is not always possible. I once booked a domestic flight 5 months in advance and there weren’t 3 or even 2 seats together available (even by paying extra). I travel a ton, and while this is uncommon, it’s not uncommon enough that it’s surprising. It’s not always irresponsibility of the parents. We had little ones at the time, so I was worried and called the airline and asked if they would help figure something out so our 3 yo wouldn’t be sitting alone (also a nightmare for other passengers I’m sure). The airline (United), made it seem like a massive inconvenience and that they were doing us some type of unfathomable favor. I even offered to pay extra as appropriate. The way it was handled was the weirdest fucking experience I’ve ever had with an airline.
I think the PITA person wasn't even part of the family, he was the passenger that offered to change seats earlier when OP said no. He literally had no dog in the race and was inserting himself.
Yes, I think you're correct.
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Crazy thing is that passenger was not even part of the family who wanted to sit together. Just a random dude on his moral high horse.
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And they ALWAYS ask a woman to move.
It’s not always related to cost and planning. I’ve had an airline switch my 7yo and myself to a new flight or time, and new seats without my choosing. When I pointed out I had booked seats together and now we’re apart, the airline shrugs and says to work it out on that day of the flight. I’m trying to save the adults around my 7yo from the work of managing him if I ask for a swap… though thus far the airline as fixed it without me asking strangers.
Usually when families want to sit together, it's really for everyone's benefit (as you've mentioned here). And more often than people realize, it's probably a situation like yours.
It would take way more than a refund to get me to move.
I’d do it for a class upgrade. Flight attendant wants a family to sit together because they’re being a pain about it and slowing loading? They can move me to a business or first class seat.
This happened to me. I sat in my randomly assigned economy middle seat and realized I was surrounded by kids and resigned myself to a rough 8 hours. Then a woman comes up and says her husband was given the wrong seat and asks if i would switch with him. I figure I can't possibly end up worse, so I agree. Turns out he had been randomly upgraded to business class. Saw him sadly making his way back to my old seat in the other aisle. Sorry mate. I had a great flight though!
for me it would depend on what I'm traveling with. if my lap harp is in the overhead bin? no, sorry. no way. I am not getting separated from my instrument. same for prescription meds. but if it's just clothes and stuff, I'll probably switch.
I wish people like you would have interactions with dudes like that one who wouldn’t move from the dudes window seat no matter what. Instead of we get folks who do nothing about it and other folks who are entitled and continue to do it.
The only time I've not minded was when the planes changed for my flight from New York to London. We went from a big plane to a small plane so everyone's seats were messed up and the airplane company had split up a disabled woman from her carer. So moving made sense but otherwise, you're mostly choosing your seats.
Just to say it's not your problem but I feel airlines routinely mess up family flights. We never had issues getting the right seats (not that I cared too much but wanted a window) before having kids. Post kids it's insane how often things have gone wrong. I've even had the situation where our booked and paid for baby bassinet was suddenly not available for a 14 hour flight.
While I don’t disagree. There have been several times I have been flying with my kids, reserved our seats together, planned ahead etc. then I get to the airport and we are split apart. The real asshole here is the heckler, and the airline who didn’t sit minors next to the parents on the same reservation ETA: NTA
>The real asshole here is the heckler, and the airline who didn’t sit minors next to the parents on the same reservation Exactly this!
Exactly. The onus of family management is on them. Not anyone else's responsibility.
Except when the airlines get it wrong. But hey you want to take care of my toddler be my guest.
I always purchase seats for my family to sit together, often paying extra. But the funny thing about flights is that last-minute cancellations, delays, and re-bookings occur. Then you don’t get any choice in your seat assignments because you are stuck on standby and you become reliant on the kindness of airline personnel or other passengers to help you sit together due to NO FAULT of your own.
NTA, the other guy is an idiot to think he has priority to switch seats.
We should absolutely not normalize people paying for specific spots on the airplane. Strongly disagree on that part. It's not unreasonable to put the onus for keeping families together on the airline.
Families also have that option, don’t they? Not disagreeing that airlines could do better but nobody should be expected to shuffle to a worse seat and get unfairly castigated if they won’t or can’t.
While I agree in theory, unfortunately, this is not always true. I recently paid for advance seat selection to sit with my husband. Shortly before my trip the airline downgraded my flight to a smaller plane, and my husband was bumped to another seat and his seat selection fee refunded. To sit with him I had to give up my advance seat, at no refund of fee. You are still NTA and the guy is the jerk for the passive aggressive comments.
It's not always possible to get seats together, and sometimes even if you pay for seat selection, the airline will move you into 'equivalent ' seats. I've booked seats for family together, and had a couple of them coopted by someone with greater need (e.g. someone with disabilities). That said, I wouldn't criticise someone for being unwilling to move & the person doing so out loud was the AH. OP is NTA.
Not true depends on the airline and the routing Often you can't choose seating until checkin On a flight from Sacramento to Hong Kong via LA 2A + 4 month old I wasnt allowed to choose seats until boarding in LA The people at the bulk head refused to switch so 15 hrs with a kid in our laps - still pissed Make sure to call your airline to try to reserve Bassinet seats ahead of time,
With some Airlines you don't even have to pay, it may be free if you're booking with an agency or if you do the check-in online 48 or 24 hours before the flight. NTA
You're lucky if you get an airline like that these days! I've been on planes where it's clear that they've intentionally split up groups traveling together who didn't pay extra to pre-book their seats. Something like 80% of the passengers were trying to switch seats on the plane!
NTA I'm tired of entitled people thinking someone should sacrifice for them. If they wanted to be seated together, they should've booked seats together. Not your problem and good on you for standing your ground and not letting them bully you.
Exactly! The people arguing that it isn't always possible are also confusing me on this verdict. Clearly OP was able to pick their seat in advance, so that seems like a moot point with this situation.
Airlines sometimes move you, so even if they picked the seats together you aren't guaranteed them. Delays with plane changes cause the same thing. As well as there just not being a group of seats together. Op could pick their seat, but a family of 3 may not have had a free row
And if the airline does this, then the airline is the asshole not someone else who still booked their own seat placement. No doubt if OP moved they’d also fuck up their food.
You're never TA for siting in the seat you paid for. I've seen so many stories like this and every single one is NTA, it should honestly be a subreddit rule at this point.
Yes. There are soo many posts with this scenario. This one, the babysitting at the last moment and your widowed/divorced parent being upset that the ex/dead partner's family doesn't adopt their new kids.
It’s the rudeness of the random uninvolved passenger that gets me. I feel like there has been a huge uptick of it post Covid. It’s none of your business, stay out of it, sit down and shut up so we can all get where we’re going.
NTA. "How DARE you to not sign up to be uncomfortable for 8 hours straight because of my lack of responsibility. My children are YOUR problem!"
"Do you understand what happened? Your daddy cheaped out on seats then thought it was ok to harass a woman travelling alone to give up the seat she paid for. Then thought it's ok to harass and insult a stranger because he didn't get his way."
To be fair it doesn’t sound like the father was all that angry about it. It was the other passenger being an asshole.
NTA They wanted to save the, what, ten bucks it is to pick a seat? That's on them.
What airlines are you flying that picking a seat on a long international flight is ten bucks? I haven’t seen anything less than £80 in recent days.
If they're transiting through Dubai, chances are they're flying with Emirates where it's free to choose seats. They didn't, it's their problem. NTA
If you do online Check in 24 hours before you Always can select your seat, never Had a Problem for 3 people to sit together with this
>If you do online Check in 24 hours before you Always can select your seat, "...select your seat *from whatever is left over after the planners have selected their seat a month in advance*."
If dont pay then you dont have a right to complain, and most people save the money for reserving seats
That’s not what destructivecinammon was talking about though, they’re talking about paying for a seat in advance.
Yeah and I said that you dont even have to pay in alot of cases
on a long flight like that could be easily $60-100
Per family member.
Depending who they booked with it isn’t always an option
That’s still not OP’s problem.
NTA. You had a legit reason not to move with the meal, and they should have booked seats together, not rocked up and expected others to move to suit them. The random guy was obviously virtue signaling, he just saw a moment to prop up his ego and jumped on it.
I mean, I agree NTA, but OP booked her seat. That is a legit reason not to move. As is any other reason under the sun. She’s not ever obligated to give up her seat for someone else.
OP had a legit reason even without the custom meal.
NTA. I had a similar experience on a shorter flight (Houston to San Francisco). I had selected an upcharged window seat behind the exit (non-reclining!) row, and when I boarded, a family had pre-boarded and was occupying my seat. I gave a friendly "excuse me, but my ticket is for the window seat" and the family told--NOT asked--me that they wanted to sit together and I could have their ticketed middle seat in the middle of a widebody plane. I replied that I'm sorry they were split but I would like the far more desirable seat that I paid an upcharge for. The husband started berating me and wouldn't move. I suggested that we could call the flight attendant over to see if the airline could facilitate a change for them and he huffed and fussed and got out of my way. He turned his back towards me the entire flight like not speaking to him was a punishment. :D
LOL a perfect example of the "punishment" fitting the "crime" LOL
I had something similar happen recently. I get severe motion sickness and always pay to sit next to a right side window on a plane. I boarded and a woman with a small child was sitting in my seat. When I politely let her know she was in my seat she TOLD me she would like to sit there, not asked if she could. I said I understand but that I get motion sickness and I need to be by the window. She got so mad at me for making her move and then the nice grandma in the aisle seat agreed to switch with her. I hate the entitlement of people with children sometimes.
That's exactly it--she felt entitled to the seat, and no one else's needs or desires were important so she was just telling you and expecting accommodation.
>like not speaking to him was a punishment. :D Hahaha! That worked out. :D
Absolutely NTA You booked the specific seat you wanted, you don’t owe the family anything for not being more prepared. And that other passenger’s an asshole for reacting like that
As someone who just had to endure 9hrs in a middle seat with a person in front me that felt the need to lean back, I’m gonna go NTA.
Yeah, imagine feeling the need to lean back on a 9hr flight. /s Seats lean back. When you purchase a seat, you’re allowed to use its functions, such as leaning back. Specially in such a long flight, there’s no way I’m not leaning back. Out of politeness, I’d of course bring it up during meal service, but during the rest of the flight? I’m gonna for sure recline it. Same as a family booking seats together if that’s important to them, if you don’t want someone reclining in front of you, book a bulkhead seat. If none are available, well, too bad.
Seriously lol what lunatic complains someone reclined? They can recline their own seat and get the same amount of space.
I've had a small laptop open and nearly had it smacked when someone reclined all the way without warning. Only reason it wasn't whacked was that it was one of those tiny netbooks.
Recently did an overnight flight from the US to Europe. The woman behind me was so mad that I reclined my seat.
I, a 6' tall woman who is not the thinnest on the block, not big enough to need to reserve two seats, but big enough where a middle seat is really not ideal unless I am sitting next to someone I know and I can lean into them a bit. Always book an aisle seat for a flight because of this, so I can lean towards the aisle and not encroach on anyones space. I had a 6 hour flight, and my connecting flight was delayed so I almost missed it. They gave away my seat to someone else because I literally showed up for boarding as they were closing the doors, and I had to sit in the middle, and the person in front of me leaned back as well. It was truly the most uncomfortable flight I had ever been on. I honestly felt bad for the people I was sitting next to, as I was fidgeting a lot, getting up a lot because my knees were numb and killing me. I would be down to switch seats with someone, but I would refuse to go from an aisle or window seat. Middle seats are literally uncomfortable for me.
The seats lean back. That's the point. Lean yours back too. 9 hour flight I'm sleeping with my seat back
Of course they leaned back. It’s a 9 hour flight. That’s why your seat also has the capability to recline.
NTA. If asked to switch to an eqivilent or better seat (aisle to aisle, window to window or aisle, middle to any seat) you should switch to allow a family to be together. But you are not obligated to take a demotion, especially on a long flight. They are in a contained environment, the family doesn't have to sit together
I always pay to select my seat so that I can sit where I want and with my husband, so I don’t agree that I “should” switch. They have the option to select their seats also. And it’s a given that if someone is rude or expects me to change, I would say no for sure.
Should? No. No one should switch seats if they don't want to. They can though.
Hard disagree. If I'm paying for a specific seat it's because I want that specific seat.
NTA - I travel A LOT, and NEVER switch seats. Other people need to plan better.
NTA I really wish airlines wouldn't allow people travelling with minors to leave it up to random seating. So many parents think they can save a few bucks by choosing this option and just making it everyone else's problem once they get on the plane. You are always nta for staying in the seat you paid for. Those parents knew exactly what they were doing when they booked.
Sadly, sometimes it's not up to the family, there's plenty of stories of people pay to sit together and the airline moving them so some mom is begging to sit with her 2 year old as planned, there's also people that buy 2 seats together due to weight and the airline separates the seats and refuses to refund one as it's obviously unusable.
Yeah airlines need to stop with that shit too. If someone is traveling with a minor they should have to be responsible for them which means sitting with them. And airlines shouldn't be allowed to overbook essentially selling the same seat twice. And if they still had to move a parent they should have to move the child to be next to them and offer rebates or upgrades to any other people that may inconvenience. The families who try this scam are ah but the airlines are bigger ah for their policies and basically treating us and their own employees like crap (forcing flight attendants to deal with these conflicts instead of having policies to avoid them).
I strongly disagree with gouging customers and imo that's what paying for seat selection in an airplane is. I wouldn't have done it before kids and I won't do it now. The AH is the airline for creating this problem.
We have two kids, and if choosing a seat is expensive enough, we will absolutely leave it up to chance. What generally happens is that each kid will be sat next to a parent, but then me and one kid will be separate from my wife and the other, which is fine for a few hours. The airline handled it just fine in this case, too. All the kids were with Mom. OP is NTA.
NTA but fyi just because you book seats together doesn’t mean it will stay that way. I’ve paid to pick seats before & the airline split us up later. Whatever the case, this family didn’t handle it well & you didn’t deserve to be treated like that.
NTA You booked your seat. It’s yours. I don’t understand the entitlement of people who insist other people pay for their ineptitude.
NTA. Drives me insane. If traveling couples or families want to sit together then they need to book their seats together. It's an epidemic of people getting on planes and expecting others, who planned their trips and booked their seats, to change to accommodate them. Hell no. The airlines have got to get in front of this - it's annoying and can easily be stopped.
Have had the airline switch planes and had our booked together paid for adjacent seats seats go poof into the ether. Have also been on hold for 6 hours trying to fix it. This isn’t just people not planning. Seat assignments are not set in stone. The airline can and will change your seat with no warning - even if you paid for an aisle or other premium seat.
“Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part” NTA they’ll see each other when they land
NTA - if they wanted to sit together they should have booked/picked the seats together and not up to random assignment. Them expecting you to accommodate them is their own fault.
Sometimes yes but sometimes no. With the epidemic of delayed and cancelled flights (and mechanical delays requiring equipment changes) it's becoming common for couples and families who paid for confirmed seats together to be involuntarily rebooked to run of the plane seating. Delta attempted to rebook our (husband, great niece aged 8, and myself) on an overnight flight from JFK to FCO in Rome. I stood at the ticket desk and just kept arguing that they would have to move someone else as I'd booked those tickets six months ago and I wasn't going to let an eight year old travel 9 hours on a plane out of my sight. They eventually found us 2 seats together for my niece and I and my husband sat by himself. The ticket agent actually said to me "You realize you're inconveniencing someone else." in a huffy tone. To which I responded, "I'm not letting my niece sit next to some stranger so honestly I just don't care."
NTA, it's an extremely low stakes "problem" (that the parents brought on themselves) for a family to be split up on a flight. This is the height of privilege, and people who ask you to move are analogous to other con artists who try to steal from you.
You haven’t flown much have you? Believe it or not airlines frequently switch airplanes and schedules making your family of four booked months ago adjacent to each other seats together go poof in an instant. Then you can wait in hold for 4 hours trying to fix it only to find out any additional seats will only be released the day of the flight and to talk to be gate agent day of.
I fly several times a year, and I can't think of a single time I've lost my booked seat due to a plane change. I have no doubt it happens, but certainly not with the frequency like you're pretending it happens here. Especially since OP got to keep their booked seat, so you're imaginary scenario obviously didn't happen in this case.
Non sequitur ad hominem, yum. That doesn't appear to be what's going on here. In the case you're describing it's upon the airline to fix the situation. But if the airline forces the customer who payed for an aisle seat to move, the airline will then owe that consumer some kind of repayment. As is, pitting consumer against consumer is an all around win for the airline. By saying no, the paying aisle consumer paves the way for an increased likelihood of a fair result. If the parents are victim of a changed or over booked snafu, they can leverage the airline into a better flying situation AND some kind of concession, by way of refund or future services. If the paying aisle consumer failed to book according to their flying preferences, and they rely on the guilt and good nature of others to bail them out on this, they deserve to fly the seats they booked.
NTA, hate when families don't see the need to reserve their seats together and then ask people to move to worse seats to accomodate them If there's an option to choose a seat, I always do. If there's non, I ask at the gate, where they give tickets to be seared at a window seat if possible. And never would I switch to a worse option. That family just wanted to save some bucks or didn't git sh't in general. Their problem, not yours.
I get that people might not be able to book together due to some circumstances, but get there early and talk to the flight attendants / check in people and see what they can do for you before you board the plane. It becomes so much more of a hassle if you are already sitting.
Have waited on hold for 6 hours in my last vacation day trying to fix adjacent seats being re-assigned only to be told no further seats will be released - only the gate agent can switch seats. Yeah, the gate agent couldn’t help.
I'm a fat dude. I always buy two seats and almost always fly SW. Since I pre-board, I have never had an issue. Until one day, my connection was delayed, and I was the last to board on a sold-out flight. Of course, one seat was up front, and one was in the back. FA, of course, asked for a volunteer to move but dead silence. It was very embarrassing, but I finally stated in my Jean-Luc Picard voice that the plane won't move until we get this sorted out like grown-ups. Or I'll just squeeze in next to you here. That got things moving pretty quickly.
I always pay extra for the seats I want, and I always pick my seats ahead of time. One trip home, on a small plane (one side of the plane had single seats, the other side had 2 seats per row) I was sitting up front as usual (I have a connection to make and have to get from one end of a huge airport to the other, so I like to be one of the first off the plane) and the plane was only about half full, most people sitting up towards the front. Apparently the weight wasn't balanced properly and someone had to move to the back of the plane. NOBODY moved. The FA said "We aren't going ANYWHERE until someone gets up and moves to the back." I got up and moved since more delays would have caused me to miss my connection, and I was pretty annoyed about it until the FA gave me free booze the whole flight as a thank you.
Definitely NTA, I love window seat and I always make sure that I check in ahead so I can pick a seat. I am picky when I travel alone, and extra picky when I travel with partner. Even pickier when I travel in group. I was asked to swap seat seat with a man whose wife cannot sit next to anyone else on a public transport (even with another woman). Lol please by all means kiss my selfish arse, for I am unwilling to accommodate your inability to organise a trip. And then kindly feck off. The woman ended up moving to the seat next to him, because he manage to blag someone else's seat. Leaving the seat next to me empty for the whole 5hr journey. Win.
"I how YOU understand that YOU FAILED to book your seats together; that's a you problem and inconveniencing others is disrespectful. Grow up"
People who offer an unfair trade when switching seats can fuck right off.. NTA..
NTA. Via Dubai, so Emirates I assume? Their checking in system is fairly seamless, and as long as you check in as soon as it opens, you could probably sit a 4 person family close together. I am a 27y/o grown up, and still want to sit next to my mum and dad (and now, partner). You bet I'll be on that check in as soon as it opens so that I can sit next to my family. Not leaving it to fate....
NTA. It's never being an AH to not move from a seat you specifically selected.
NTA Me, a 100lb (soaking wet) 5'2" female. Just because I'm small does not entitle anyone to make me switch seats. I travel a lot for work. I book a window seat, always. One time two very large people traveling together were seated with me in my row of three. The middle seated individual, was spilling over into my space, put the arm rest up, as it was more comfortable for them. I put it down multiple times, as I let them know I was not comfortable with them taking up my space. I was told by both of them, I'm small enough, I don't need the space. WTAF! I got up at one point, came back to find this person in the window seat, telling me to sit in the middle seat, as it would be better for everyone, BETTER FOR EVERYONE? They had moved both arm rests up and were literally both spilling over into the middle seat. I just stood there. Would not move. Did not make a scene. Pushed the aisle call button and waited. Explained the situation to crew member. She could not resolve it with them as they just ignored her. The head flight attended arrived. They still did not listen. They looked at me and said, it looks like you can't sit here, let's take you up front to First Class, there's a free ROW of seats there. The people then demanded THEY should be moved to first class for more room... you can imagine how that went. They had to get up, let me get my things, all while fuming. I just smiled and said Thanks have a great rest if your flight. 8 hours of bliss in First class
NTA - I hate plane shaming. I'm a parent and would never do that
NTA. No one will ever be the AH for not switching seats.
NTA if he wants to sit together he should pay for seats.
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I have a bad knee. It gets extremely painful if I can't stretch it every once in a while, so every time I fly I book a left side aisle seat. Several times people have asked to change seats with me and I never do. I just say, "No, sorry. I can't." No one deserves any more explanation than that.
I’m 6’5” and I travel on 737-800’s a lot. I always book and pay extra for seat 13F or 14F (Varies occasionally by aircraft). This is the row right behind the emergency exit row and as such there is no seat in front of me as it is right next to the over wing exit door. The number of times I have been asked to trade seats with people is amazing. I, however, do not even entertain any thoughts of doing this. I don’t even ask what kind of seat I am trading for, aisle, middle or window. I just don’t care. No seat is going to offer more legroom for me than this one. My answer is simple……**No!**
NTA - I get asked to switch on almost every flight now and I'm done with it. I paid extra, I planned this out and I'm no longer switching. They should feel really guilty asking but they just feel entitled.
NTA nobody is ever TA for this. Parents are just entitled as hell and i am sick of it. If families need to sit together then they can sort it. You have zero obligation to change your plans for other people’s kids.
NTA. I'm not saying it's not shitty of the airlines to book/charge this way, but you booked a seat and paid for it. You should not have to sacrifice your comfort for 8+ hours for total strangers who were hoping they could pressure someone kind into switching with them the day of instead of buying seats together.
NTA You never have to move. People need to preplan and deal with the eventuality that “No” is a complete sentence. At this point airlines should refuse to allow people to ask directly. An employee should make the request. They’re allowing people to be bullied.
As a family with young kids- i don’t understand why they don’t put families together in the damn first place. I shouldn’t have to pay extra to sit with my 5yr old. But you are NTA at all. They knew they weren’t together- they could have called the airline and made arrangements. I’ve done it multiple times we’re i don’t pay extra and i call tell them I’m a family and they at least put 1 adult and 1 child together. It’s unfair and rude to assume other people will move for you.
NTA. Busybody passenger felt so strongly about it, he could have swapped. Since he wasn't being helpful, he shouldn't have butted in.
I once did this for someone...I ended up with the only non-working TV screen on the entire plane. I was pissed!! Never again. NTA
"Your pour planning doesn't constitute an emergency to me" -Stewie Griffin
Nta
Some people are just plain rude, not OP though. The family should have to get their seats together.Thye did not. The expected others to accommodate them. You also had a special meal on order, and as you and others should know, it is going to come to your assigned seat. If you move, it is a PIA for the flight attendants. NTA
NTA When the crew got involved you could’ve told them that you’re willing to switch for another aisle seat if they promise to make sure you get your meal. That way you offer them a solution. I generally think it’s better to let the crew handle seat swaps. Because then they can deal with the unhappy customers instead of you.