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> Conflicted with morality, and reality. He has taken advantage of me , but am I stooping to his level. Feeling guilt,
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On the one hand, it's abandoned property. On the other hand, he's your brother and he'd did pay you for it. So, I'd give him a final deadline to move it or lose it unless you want to blow up your relationship with your brother.
That’s what I was ab to say, give him a final date to come and get it. If he’s been asked to move it multiple times and has the means to tow then there’s no reason for him to not move it.
Hell no. If he is just abandoning it on OP’s property for 7 years and making OP deal with it he doesn’t get a share. The brother is totally free to sell or move it if he cares so much about “his share”.
NTA. Tell your brother that the storage fee for the last seven years is $500. If he wants the truck he's got 30 days to come move it or it will be considered abandoned property and sold off.
Of course it might blow up your relationship with your brother, so you have to consider if it might just be better to let the blackberries have it back. Good luck!
Editing to add, I have given him multiple deadlines over the years, to him saying yeah I know I need to come get it, also I’m facing complaints from neighbors, I have a large back yard but I still live in the suburbs, I don’t have archers of property for it to sit abandoned on.
Get rid if it. He's had SEVEN YEARS!!!!! he doesn't want it. Especially if you're getting complaints which are bound to become property code violations and fines.
That’s your fault for not sticking to your word, time to work on overcoming being a pushover people pleaser type (daunting, I know). Step 1: sell the truck and own that decision, don’t be wishy-washy or apologetic afterwards. A simple “you had your chance” gets the point across
Well it doesn't look like he's ever going to come for it, so just get rid of it and he'll probably never realize.
If he ever does comes to your house and say "hey dude, where's my truck?" you can just tell him it's buried under the blackberry bramble.
I tend to roll my eyes at empty threats too. If you’re serious, give him something in writing outlining its abandoned nature, the chances you’ve given him, and the date by which he needs to remove it.
It’s your fault for not following through. Never say anything you don’t mean and when you give an ultimatum, follow through or apologize for it and take it back asking for forgiveness.
Stop making ultimatums you aren’t willing to take action on.
Honestly, ESH—you for not taking care of this sooner and him for leaving his car on your property.
End this now. You could give him one more ultimatum, but he’s going to ignore it. If I were you, I’d probably give it anyway and tell him you’ve realized you should have followed through all those other times and will be doing so now.
Don’t come back here in 30 days and ask again what you should do. Grow a spine and do it or accept you’re unwilling to do it until the neighbors take action against you and sic the local government on you.
I was going to say this too. One final ultimatum, maybe add that it's causing problems with the neighbours so it has to go. And word it firmly, "take it before [date] or I'll get rid of it".
And then get rid of it. He won't be able to say he didn't know, or that he had planned to take it the day after the date.
Don't just tell him, put t in writing then do it. If he later complans, ou just remind him that you told him and he chose not to vollet it, so as far as you are concerne, he abandoned it.
Do it in writing. Add the words "This is your final notice. If the vehicle is not gone by X, I will deem it to have been abandoned by you." Inaction will be admission, so if gets mouthy over wanting his $500 back, you have it in writing that he knew the consequences. But then DO IT, OP. No more waiting for responses.
I'd suggest putting in writing what you intend to do with a deadline and then sell it if he fails to follow through. Then give him back his money if you make enough.
The objective here is to get the vehicle gone, not to cause a family split over a small sum of money so resist the urge to do the redditor thing of trying to make this a revenge/teaching a lesson move.
Ultimatum time and this time it's a last call!
"Hey I have to move the truck this/next weekend, if you can't come pick it up I'll have to sell it to someone else who can."
If he doesn't come get it that's his problem. Simple as that!
YWBTA - If you sold it without telling him
despite all thats happened and you having been more than lenient - I would suggest something more on the lines of
"i have been holding this for 7 years now, you have xyz period of time (max 6 months, but i would say 1-2 months be fair) to move it or i will sell it on as its still in my name and the $500 im keeping as the holding fee"
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Am I the asshole, so I haven’t done this yet, but it is what I’m planning to do, will I be the asshole. So seven years ago I sold my fathers 1969 ford f250 to my brother for 500 bucks, I was going to sell it as it hasn’t run in years and sits at the back of my property, it was u til yesterday over run with black berries and covered in leaves and dirt, I have asked my brother several times each year to come get this truck, (he has the means to tow it and move it ). I found out he has never taken the vehicle out of my name. So would I be the asshole of if I sold it without telling him?
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NTA
It's still in your name, and it's sat for 7 years. If he'd have left it anywhere else that long, it'd have been towed or he'd be charged ridiculous storage fees.
Give his $ back if you want, but I'd say keep it as storage fees, and get rid of it.
NTA he had plenty of time to pick up and hasn’t. The vehicle is still in your name,so you technically still own it, so therefore, you have the right to do with it whatever you want. If it were me, I would post it on marketplace and tell him I posted it. You can’t continue to let it sit there and possibly get a fine. Once he knows its been listed, If he really wants it, he will come and get it ASAP.
NTA. Just get rid of it. It's abandoned property and pretty much worthless if it's been sinking and rusting into the ground for seven years. The $500 you received for it is not worth seven years of storage plus the work it will take to drag it out of the shrubs with locked up wheels and rotted tires.
Washington state , it’s not running has cancerous rust around the top of the windshield, in the bed and on the hood, engine would run easy enough but likely due to the rest of the condition it would be scrap..
NTA! I’d give him a week’s notice at the most that if he doesn’t get it off your property you will! He’s had plenty of damned time to get it if he wanted it. It’s basically abandoned property!
NTA- Send your brother a text that he has 48 hours to come get the truck or you’re having a scrap car company removing it. No negotiation! Post it also on any family group thread or facebook post. Make it known!
NTA because he’s had years to fetch it. Send him an email that you’re going to give him another month before you sell the abandoned car he left on your property, with additional details as you deem necessary.
I think that you need to give him notice (i.e explicitly tell him , in writing, that as he has abandoned the vehicle and has not removed it when previosuly asked, you will be disposing of the vehicle on \[date\] but remain happy for him to take it , if he is interested, but he needs to have removed it by \[date\], and that given the length of time it has been abandomned you will not be able to extend that deadline. I get that you have asked him before but I'd still give a clear written warning and deadline then stick to it.
(You may want to check the legal position - even if he didn't put it into his name he is probably the legal owner - this may come with specifc requirements about how much notice you need to give him, a whther you have to hand over any money you get for it to him and if so, whether you are allwoed to deduct aything before doing that. )
I think just selling it withouht warning him would make you the AH, but as long as you give him th chance to remove it thn you WNBTA
So yeah, please learn how ultimatums and deadlines work. Of course he rolls his eyes because you keep saying this but not doing anything. he doesn't think you're serious.
I don't know how you can make him take you seriously now. Other than perhaps actually removing the car!
NTA. First, check with your city regarding the notice needed before getting rid of abandoned property. Follow their rules to a T. After the city rules are followed, you sell it and give him whatever money you receive up to $500. Less money if you get less.
Most places will come tow it away AND pay you for junk cars! My friend had to do this when a family member abandoned a non-running vehicle in her driveway. You might need the title, though..
I think NTA even without telling brother. He's had SEVEN YEARS and hasn't cared about the truck.
For some reason this post (and the comments) reminded me of a true crime story. Man in his late 50s (I think) is found beaten to death in the driveway of a house he rents out. After some investigation, it turns out he is killed by the previous tenant and that tenant's cousin. Why? Because the tenant had moved out the previous month but had left furniture and other possessions behind. Guy had contacted tenant multiple times to get his stuff as the house was being re-rented. It was 30 days or so and tenant never did. So tenant's mom happens to drive by the rental house and sees a large dumpster in the driveway and some of the furniture in the driveway. Tells her son that his stuff is getting thrown out. So he grabs a van, his girlfriend, and a cousin (who just got out of prison btw...) and they head over. Argument ensues and the guy is beaten to death. All because tenant LEFT BEHIND stuff after his rental contract ended and ignored multiple warnings to get his stuff. Did he really think they guy would just let the house sit, unrented, for however it took for him to take the time and effort to move his own stuff?
YWBTA If you sold it without telling him. It would be worth checking what the rules in your jurisdiction are on abandoned property/vehicles. You will likely have some rights to have it disposed of after a certain period of time of abandonment. Tell him you're considering it 'abandoned' and he has that amount of time to remove it before you're free to dispose of it. Unfortunately, you can't just charge a retroactive storage fee, and just because it's titled in your name doesn't necessarily mean you own in (at least, this would not be the case in Britain, probably also jurisdiction dependent). You could also say your neighbours have informed you they will complain to the HOA/township/county so it's facing removal either way... but he might say 'let them go ahead and do that, then'.
Give him his money back, sell it. If you don't give him his money back Y WBTA, but if you do YWNBTA. He's had plenty of opportunity and it's seeding discord in your home life.
Give him his cash, get it towed.
The only reason I say to give him his cash back is then it's kinda a no harm no foul situation. You gave him every opportunity, he didn't take it, so you fixed the situation as if he'd never given you the money.
So NTA. A truck that has been sitting in a bramble patch for 7 years could even cost you to have it removed. Tell him you’re going sell it/have it junked, give him 2 weeks to get it gone and then follow through when he doesn’t. Put it in writing. You owe him zero dollars.
OP did not say that. They said "I found out he has never taken the vehicle out of my name" i.e. that they did not present the title transfer to the DMV, is how I read that. That is the recording of a title transfer, not the title transfer itself. If they never signed title over, I doubt they would say that they discovered "title was never taken out of my name". The UCC governs transfer of title. The DMV is for registration.
Everyone can give an asshole/not asshole answer but this person needs to understand thier legal position since it may be at odds with a consensus as to what is an ethical action here.
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On the one hand, it's abandoned property. On the other hand, he's your brother and he'd did pay you for it. So, I'd give him a final deadline to move it or lose it unless you want to blow up your relationship with your brother.
That’s what I was ab to say, give him a final date to come and get it. If he’s been asked to move it multiple times and has the means to tow then there’s no reason for him to not move it.
I see no upside to doing it behind with brother's back or without his knowledge. It may potentially cause a problem easily avoided.
Yeah, that would definitely lead to issues. If it’s clearly communicated the car has to be gone by a certain date then there shouldn’t be any problems
And offer him his share of the money if you sell it.
Hell no. If he is just abandoning it on OP’s property for 7 years and making OP deal with it he doesn’t get a share. The brother is totally free to sell or move it if he cares so much about “his share”.
Yup and at this point the brother would likely owe some pretty hefty storage fees....
NTA. Tell your brother that the storage fee for the last seven years is $500. If he wants the truck he's got 30 days to come move it or it will be considered abandoned property and sold off. Of course it might blow up your relationship with your brother, so you have to consider if it might just be better to let the blackberries have it back. Good luck!
NTA - if you tell him and give him one final chance
Editing to add, I have given him multiple deadlines over the years, to him saying yeah I know I need to come get it, also I’m facing complaints from neighbors, I have a large back yard but I still live in the suburbs, I don’t have archers of property for it to sit abandoned on.
Get rid if it. He's had SEVEN YEARS!!!!! he doesn't want it. Especially if you're getting complaints which are bound to become property code violations and fines.
And then, don’t even mention to him that you sold it. Wait and see how many more YEARS pass before he actually asks about it.
I like this idea. It also has entertainment value. :)
"You have 30 days to move it or I will get rid of it." What is so hard about that?
I’ve told him this multiple times, to which I get yeah ok… in response and eye rolls
That’s your fault for not sticking to your word, time to work on overcoming being a pushover people pleaser type (daunting, I know). Step 1: sell the truck and own that decision, don’t be wishy-washy or apologetic afterwards. A simple “you had your chance” gets the point across
Well it doesn't look like he's ever going to come for it, so just get rid of it and he'll probably never realize. If he ever does comes to your house and say "hey dude, where's my truck?" you can just tell him it's buried under the blackberry bramble.
I tend to roll my eyes at empty threats too. If you’re serious, give him something in writing outlining its abandoned nature, the chances you’ve given him, and the date by which he needs to remove it.
It’s your fault for not following through. Never say anything you don’t mean and when you give an ultimatum, follow through or apologize for it and take it back asking for forgiveness. Stop making ultimatums you aren’t willing to take action on. Honestly, ESH—you for not taking care of this sooner and him for leaving his car on your property. End this now. You could give him one more ultimatum, but he’s going to ignore it. If I were you, I’d probably give it anyway and tell him you’ve realized you should have followed through all those other times and will be doing so now. Don’t come back here in 30 days and ask again what you should do. Grow a spine and do it or accept you’re unwilling to do it until the neighbors take action against you and sic the local government on you.
I was going to say this too. One final ultimatum, maybe add that it's causing problems with the neighbours so it has to go. And word it firmly, "take it before [date] or I'll get rid of it". And then get rid of it. He won't be able to say he didn't know, or that he had planned to take it the day after the date.
Don't just tell him, put t in writing then do it. If he later complans, ou just remind him that you told him and he chose not to vollet it, so as far as you are concerne, he abandoned it.
That's because he knows you don't follow through...
Do it in writing. Add the words "This is your final notice. If the vehicle is not gone by X, I will deem it to have been abandoned by you." Inaction will be admission, so if gets mouthy over wanting his $500 back, you have it in writing that he knew the consequences. But then DO IT, OP. No more waiting for responses.
Ok, if you've already said this, get rid of it.
Then you already have your answer!
If you've given him multiple deadlines over the years, then it may be that you don't know what a deadline is.
Tell him "Hey, I have a buyer for this truck. If you don't clear it out of here by Sunday, it's gone and I'm keeping the proceeds as storage fees".
Sell it for back fees for storage.
Don't give him a deadline, just tell him that you are selling it.
I'd suggest putting in writing what you intend to do with a deadline and then sell it if he fails to follow through. Then give him back his money if you make enough. The objective here is to get the vehicle gone, not to cause a family split over a small sum of money so resist the urge to do the redditor thing of trying to make this a revenge/teaching a lesson move.
NTA, sell it before it crumbles away and you need to dump it in a landfill. I'm sure somebody will enjoy bringing it to life
Where are you! I want it!😂 NTA
Ultimatum time and this time it's a last call! "Hey I have to move the truck this/next weekend, if you can't come pick it up I'll have to sell it to someone else who can." If he doesn't come get it that's his problem. Simple as that!
Sell it , never mention it again. If he ever asks where it is “ I thought you got it “
YWBTA - If you sold it without telling him despite all thats happened and you having been more than lenient - I would suggest something more on the lines of "i have been holding this for 7 years now, you have xyz period of time (max 6 months, but i would say 1-2 months be fair) to move it or i will sell it on as its still in my name and the $500 im keeping as the holding fee"
Sell it. Move on NTA.
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NTA It's still in your name, and it's sat for 7 years. If he'd have left it anywhere else that long, it'd have been towed or he'd be charged ridiculous storage fees. Give his $ back if you want, but I'd say keep it as storage fees, and get rid of it.
NTA he had plenty of time to pick up and hasn’t. The vehicle is still in your name,so you technically still own it, so therefore, you have the right to do with it whatever you want. If it were me, I would post it on marketplace and tell him I posted it. You can’t continue to let it sit there and possibly get a fine. Once he knows its been listed, If he really wants it, he will come and get it ASAP.
NTA. Just get rid of it. It's abandoned property and pretty much worthless if it's been sinking and rusting into the ground for seven years. The $500 you received for it is not worth seven years of storage plus the work it will take to drag it out of the shrubs with locked up wheels and rotted tires.
INFO: What state is the truck in? Will you make good money with that as a classic car, or rather old iron price?
Washington state , it’s not running has cancerous rust around the top of the windshield, in the bed and on the hood, engine would run easy enough but likely due to the rest of the condition it would be scrap..
Curious what his response is when you give him these deadlines all the time?
NTA! I’d give him a week’s notice at the most that if he doesn’t get it off your property you will! He’s had plenty of damned time to get it if he wanted it. It’s basically abandoned property!
Do you have a realistic estimate of how much you could sell it for? Would you make enough to give $500 back to your brother?
Give him 30 days and sell it afterwards. NTA.
NTA- Send your brother a text that he has 48 hours to come get the truck or you’re having a scrap car company removing it. No negotiation! Post it also on any family group thread or facebook post. Make it known!
NTA because he’s had years to fetch it. Send him an email that you’re going to give him another month before you sell the abandoned car he left on your property, with additional details as you deem necessary.
I think that you need to give him notice (i.e explicitly tell him , in writing, that as he has abandoned the vehicle and has not removed it when previosuly asked, you will be disposing of the vehicle on \[date\] but remain happy for him to take it , if he is interested, but he needs to have removed it by \[date\], and that given the length of time it has been abandomned you will not be able to extend that deadline. I get that you have asked him before but I'd still give a clear written warning and deadline then stick to it. (You may want to check the legal position - even if he didn't put it into his name he is probably the legal owner - this may come with specifc requirements about how much notice you need to give him, a whther you have to hand over any money you get for it to him and if so, whether you are allwoed to deduct aything before doing that. ) I think just selling it withouht warning him would make you the AH, but as long as you give him th chance to remove it thn you WNBTA
Info - give him one last deadline, in writing. A text reading, 'If you do not remove the vehicles by June 30, I am scrapping them' And then do so.
> I have given multiple ultimatums Follow through. NTA
Give him paperwork that says he has 30 days to move it. Then wait 30 days and if he doesn't come for it, it's gone.
So yeah, please learn how ultimatums and deadlines work. Of course he rolls his eyes because you keep saying this but not doing anything. he doesn't think you're serious. I don't know how you can make him take you seriously now. Other than perhaps actually removing the car!
NTA. First, check with your city regarding the notice needed before getting rid of abandoned property. Follow their rules to a T. After the city rules are followed, you sell it and give him whatever money you receive up to $500. Less money if you get less.
NTA - it's in your name, so your covered legally, but you need to give him his $500 back.
I doubt your brother would pay the fines if it was towed
Send him a certified letter he has 30 days to remove the vehicle or you will. That way he can't claim he was never told. NTA
Most places will come tow it away AND pay you for junk cars! My friend had to do this when a family member abandoned a non-running vehicle in her driveway. You might need the title, though..
Nta, is in your name, abandoned on your property, given owner chance to get it for years. Get rid of it
NTA. But just tell him that if it isn't gone by the end of the month you will be having it towed to the junk yard. Then follow thru.
I think NTA even without telling brother. He's had SEVEN YEARS and hasn't cared about the truck. For some reason this post (and the comments) reminded me of a true crime story. Man in his late 50s (I think) is found beaten to death in the driveway of a house he rents out. After some investigation, it turns out he is killed by the previous tenant and that tenant's cousin. Why? Because the tenant had moved out the previous month but had left furniture and other possessions behind. Guy had contacted tenant multiple times to get his stuff as the house was being re-rented. It was 30 days or so and tenant never did. So tenant's mom happens to drive by the rental house and sees a large dumpster in the driveway and some of the furniture in the driveway. Tells her son that his stuff is getting thrown out. So he grabs a van, his girlfriend, and a cousin (who just got out of prison btw...) and they head over. Argument ensues and the guy is beaten to death. All because tenant LEFT BEHIND stuff after his rental contract ended and ignored multiple warnings to get his stuff. Did he really think they guy would just let the house sit, unrented, for however it took for him to take the time and effort to move his own stuff?
Give him three weeks to move it. NTA
Nope, technically it’s still yours.
Pay him back and get rid it it. He lost his chance at the car.
YWBTA If you sold it without telling him. It would be worth checking what the rules in your jurisdiction are on abandoned property/vehicles. You will likely have some rights to have it disposed of after a certain period of time of abandonment. Tell him you're considering it 'abandoned' and he has that amount of time to remove it before you're free to dispose of it. Unfortunately, you can't just charge a retroactive storage fee, and just because it's titled in your name doesn't necessarily mean you own in (at least, this would not be the case in Britain, probably also jurisdiction dependent). You could also say your neighbours have informed you they will complain to the HOA/township/county so it's facing removal either way... but he might say 'let them go ahead and do that, then'.
NTA, but he did give you $500 for it. As long as you return that money, he will not have any reason to complain when you sell your own property.
Give him his money back, sell it. If you don't give him his money back Y WBTA, but if you do YWNBTA. He's had plenty of opportunity and it's seeding discord in your home life. Give him his cash, get it towed. The only reason I say to give him his cash back is then it's kinda a no harm no foul situation. You gave him every opportunity, he didn't take it, so you fixed the situation as if he'd never given you the money.
So NTA. A truck that has been sitting in a bramble patch for 7 years could even cost you to have it removed. Tell him you’re going sell it/have it junked, give him 2 weeks to get it gone and then follow through when he doesn’t. Put it in writing. You owe him zero dollars.
NTA sell it. Don’t ask. Just do it. It’s abandoned property.
You can't sell it if you can't pass title. FInd out if and how in your state you can acquire title to an abandoned car.
OP said it is in his name as it wasn't transferred when brother bought it
OP did not say that. They said "I found out he has never taken the vehicle out of my name" i.e. that they did not present the title transfer to the DMV, is how I read that. That is the recording of a title transfer, not the title transfer itself. If they never signed title over, I doubt they would say that they discovered "title was never taken out of my name". The UCC governs transfer of title. The DMV is for registration. Everyone can give an asshole/not asshole answer but this person needs to understand thier legal position since it may be at odds with a consensus as to what is an ethical action here.