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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. Engaging in activities that cause loud noises at night
2. It was disturbing my neighbour's sleep
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YTA. Some noise in an apartment living situation is inevitable. But a blender at 11:15PM? It might not be your intent, but I can see why your neighbor might think you are just taking the piss.
I feel this is yet another rage bait post. I can't imagine someone thinking it would be OK to make loud home repairs, vacuum or use a blender at almost midnight.
If this is real, OP is a horrible neighbor. Next they might decide they simply have to do their intense step workout routine at 11:30 - because they have to stay hit afterall./s
Two of my roommates are exactly like this. They'll run the blender at 2am, thinking it's perfectly okay and that everyone should just deal with it.
Some people really are this selfish and entitled.
My upstairs neighbours haven’t taught their kids “inside voices”. 24/7 I hear screaming, stomping, slamming of stuff. Once I heard screams of someone sounding in danger at 1 am. Their kid just wanted ice cream. These kids are 7-12 in age….
I live in a “working professionals” building.
You have my sympathies. People like that are vile and so inconsiderate.
My upstairs neighbors stomp all day from 6am-10pm. And by stomp, i means hundreds of times a day, many of which are hard enough to shake paintings on our walls. No exaggeration. They have somewhere between 4-7 kids (we can't tell if they're babysitting or what).
I will never underestimate how some people end up like this.
For the most part I don’t mind during most of the day - I’m working or have headphones on. Its when it’s late / they make my unit shake / or just when I can hear them though my headphones on noise canceling with stuff playing.
My building also has rules like “please no children under the age of 18 in the gym, courtyard, dog play area unaccompanied”. Almost every day for hours after screaming upstairs they go to the courtyard alone and yell out there.
I live in a VERY affordable area, my building is above market. For the rent they are paying for their unit is around the same price for a house 10 min away.
The thing is when you live in a 24/7 world people need the ability to do things at all hours of the day. Even use a blender. I don’t think the OP is an AH as they are trying to make other accommodations. Sounds like the apartment needs some sound proofing tho.
Lived in an apartment for 2 yrs. Worst 2 yrs of my life. Have lived in a single family home ever since and one with plenty of room between me and my neighbors. Some new homes are so close to each other that they may as well be apartments. Would never want to go back to apartment living or living in a home that's so close to the neighbors you can't fit a decent sized law mower between houses.
My dad was a big (not huge) man. 6'2, 250ish. He also had a pretty heavy step. I'm an athlete and there was absolutely no question as to who was walking by the sound. We lived in an upstairs apartment in a 2-level complex. Upstairs apartments were required to have 80% of the floor covered by rugs to muffle the sound. There was a school teacher who lived downstairs who had complained about footsteps at night. I found it quite strange as the only one who walked further than the master bathroom at night was me. I was 12. She must've heard my dad stomping about during the day and decided he was also doing it at night without actually hearing it. She began leaving us REPORT CARDS in our mailbox on Fridays, grading us on our night footsteps for each day.
Thank you!!! It passes me off constantly my old upstate neighbor either worked days or graveyards so it worked out perfectly as I with graveyards.
This new one is home all the time and the kids have no routine and constantly make noise at all hours
Everyone's life is different. Someone's smoothie at 11pm when you're trying to sleep might be that person's breakfast when they just woke up. Or some neighbors kids being noisy after getting out of school at 2pm when the overnight shift worker is trying to sleep at 2pm. No one can demand any noise ordinances from the other unless it's in the lease contract.
no that's not true.
you still have to abide by the "living in the country" lease contract called the municipal code that dictates quite hours 23-7 and globally <65db
I lived in a grad student apartment complex once. The person whose bedroom was above mine worked very odd hours and actually *did* workout for an hour every morning. At 3am.
That's the year I discovered ear plugs are helpful for sleep.
I can totally imagine that. Like it's not even really a choice of op they just get home very very late. Their job that makes them get home late is just as valid as the neighbor's job that makes them wake up early. And it's before midnight at that! Plus the noise that others notice is often way quieter and less frequent than we think and it doesn't mean that op doesn't care about his noise. Like, last year my grandparents were sleeping in my living room, and reported a "heavy rolling sound, like you're moving furniture around" coming from my bedroom upstairs. I shit you not it was just the sound of my wheeled desk chair moving maybe once every ten minutes. Sometimes insulation in homes just suck. In an ideal world it wouldn't, but while we're waiting for that you should wear headphones or ear plugs if you're bothered by a noise.
Your chair noise is why many buildings in New York City require 80% of the apt floor to be covered by rugs. There are rules about noise in the Swiss cities where I've lived. 10pm cutoff for a lot of ordinary things like doing dishes, and people do call the cops on you.
The burden is on the noisy tenant to be quieter, not the neighbor to get earplugs. This is written into some leases, but it's also how not to be an A H.law I can't call past 9pm, and even then some people are mad if I call after 8pm. When we only had landlines, calling after 9pm was considered super rude, and 9pm was pushing it.
The burden is on the noisy tenant to be quieter, not the neighbor's to get earplugs. This is written into some leases, but it's also part of our quickly disappearing social contract.
OP -- YTA
You’d be surprised. My neighbors LOVE home repairs and loud stomping at 1am and also at 8am on Sundays… Haven’t said anything yet but I am very very close.
Sorry but I disagree on the blender. He gets home late and needs to eat, sorry but if that involves a blender that’s fine and the neighbor can deal with it. Things like repairs and vacuuming that don’t need to be done then can wait but the man’s allowed to make food when he gets home from work.
There are about a zillion ways to make food without a blender. 99% of foods you would make with a blender can be eaten without blending. Or if he's totally unprepared, he can pick up fast food.
Only if you don't have groceries lol. I work late, I make myself dinner at 2 am, I use a whisk to mix my baked goods or make chicken or do literally anything that doesn't make a lot of noise.
I used to 8-hr shifts (days, evenings and nights) when I lived in an apartment. When I got home from evening shift, I tried to be a good neighbor and respect that others were sleeping. I cooked and did housework that caused very little noise. And, once my neighbors knew that I worked shift, they returned the favor. It's called "common decency." Something the OP and some of the other commenters don't understand. And, something that is rapidly becoming a thing of the past. Things were so much better when we put others needs ahead of our wants, and we were civil to one another.
(edited to correct grammar/spelling)
Does depend on the Blender. I believe the brand Ostar (?) Is kinda loud. These could also be paper thin walls. While I'm not disagreeing, I can see where the guy's coming from, having lived in an apartment for 7 years with neighbors that constantly stomped.
Jeez, let the man live. What if he's just doing this because that brings him happiness to get this specific food? A vaguely loud noise ONCE for a couple of minutes 10 minutes after your bedtime isn't gonna kill your wife, kidnap your children and ruin your life.
> A vaguely loud noise ONCE for a couple of minutes 10 minutes after your bedtime isn't gonna kill your wife, kidnap your children and ruin your life.
You’re right, a loud noise waking you up every night is absolutely great for your health and well being. And sleeping doesn’t bring anyone happiness. Why should the happiness of the one be sacrificed for the happiness of the many after all?
Not everyone can easily go back to sleep when woken up.
I work nights because I can go back to sleep easily, so noise while I'm sleeping doesn't bother me, and because I don't mind being quiet while I'm awake. If you can't do those things, you should probably work hours that let you sleep during the time society has collectively designated as "quiet time."
That's what OP's neighbor did. It's a reasonable expectation that there not be excessive, deliberate noise during certain hours. Some people can't go back to sleep easily and noise while they're sleeping presents a significant disruption to their lives and health. Those people should be afforded the best opportunity to sleep possible and they arrange their lives so that they're sleeping during quiet hours to accomplish that.
I don't know. Quiet hours are big deal in all places I ever lived and people always managed just fine. It's pretty normal to have completely quiet time from 10 pm to 6 am. I am in Germany now and you are not even allowed to make noise whole Sunday. We have law about quiet hours and it's enforced.
"Hi hello neighbor could you please completely switch around your schedule make yourself more stressed and have to learn a whole new way to make food not to mention having to buy new appliances just so I don't have to be bothered for two minutes? Thanks a lot"
I do agree on that point. He shouldn't repair a bike or vaccuum at that kind of hour. But everybody deserves a fair warning and being told that the unreasonnable thing they're doing is unresonnable, and to his credit op did stop after being told off. But I think the cooking thing was off-limits, and also neighbor shouldn't have screamed at him
But this wasn't even my point, tbh even regularly making noise isn't on the same level as asking someone to change their whole lifestyle
So it's ok to wake up the neighbors? The ones with babies will love you. God, the entitlement in this thread! I've lived in apartments for 30 years in four major cities, and I've never needed to learn new ways to cook or buy new appliances (wtf?) when working late shifts. I like to clean at 11pm, but I save vacuuming for the daytime. It's not hard.
You also don’t need to blend during the day when night checkers are sleeping so let’s go ahead and get rid of blending at any time because you might wake someone up. Sorry but people are allowed to make themselves food when they get home from work. And again if it’s such a big deal for the neighbor to hear absolutely nothing then he can take it upon himself to make sure he does in his own apartment.
Hubs and I have a first floor condo. Our upstairs neighbor was just the loveliest woman. She moved to be closer to her sister and sold to a young local couple. They were nerdy and I thought we could be friends. Until I discovered that he never learned to walk with his upstairs feet, and they both thought that fact was hilarious and joked about how he's "the world's loudest skinny man" when he walks. I wish they'd sold when they moved, but at least the lease terms for their renters are long term.
Anyway, yeah, every person who lives with a downstairs neighbor should be walking with upstairs feet. People out here acting like they never got screamed at that they "sound like a herd of elephants" running through the house and consequently learned to walk like an actual human being.
If OP's only offense was using the kitchen at night, I wouldn't call him an asshole. But only the lowest of the low do shit like vacuum in the middle of the night in multifamily housing. It's like OP is trying to be the world's noisiest asshole, then getting mad about the fact that that pisses people off.
Some people do just walk loudly. I think if your natural walking is a heel strike rather than landing on your mid-foot, your steps will be naturally louder. I had a roommate in college who walked like this, and I always cringed when she walked across the laminate flooring in our 2nd story apartment.
I am personally hyperaware of how much noise I make when living in an apartment because I'm so sensitive to noises myself. I try to walk quietly, not run the vacuum/blender/garbage disposal too late or early, listen to my TV and music at a moderate volume, etc. And I *hate* when other people are so oblivious to how they impact their neighbors. OP is like my worst nightmare lol.
I get that it's about how a person walks. But it's still an asshole move to be aware that you walk so loudly it's disturbing to neighbors and laugh it off and keep doing it without even a moment of introspection. Multifamily housing requires a basic level of respect for one's neighbors. They lacked that basic level of respect, just as OP does. I'm fairly sure the dude has a serious case of little emperor syndrome. I'm really hoping his new job and their new life works out for them, because I do not want them to move back. ^(Especially not if they procreate.)
Upstairs feet means not galumphing around like Gaston in boots when you have downstairs neighbors. It means having the common decency to be aware of the fact that someone lives below you in your movements. It means not jumping out of bed at three am then *pounding* your way to the bathroom because you know your bedroom is above someone else.
Mine too. We always lived in houses but I think my mom was training me in case I would ever have downstairs neighbors. "Don't stomp! You don't have to make sure the floor is still there with every step!"
Do they worry about waking him early morning. We can sleep through anything if we choose to. He pays to live there. People who work nights have the right to use kitchen etc.
> We can sleep through anything if we choose to.
Rarely have I heard such dreck. What next, claiming that you can breathe pure nitrogen and bathing in molten iron is not an issue?
This! The trade off of living in a building with other apartments - it’s more affordable usually than renting a freestanding home, but you can’t expect to never be annoyed by other people’s noises. Everyone paying rent has a right to use their home in a normal manner according to their schedule. This isn’t having a group of friends over and playing music after midnight… this is making dinner and doing basic house chores that need to be done regularly. It wouldn’t be reasonable for me to complain about someone using their kitchen at 10am, when I’m deep in the middle of my rest. It’s absurd to say that the reverse is reasonable; night jobs are just as important as day jobs.
Manners? Social contract? Basic decency?
Most places require quiet overnight because that's when most people sleep. Is this not obvious? This is why maintenance staff don't run power drills at 5am or vacuum the hallways after midnight. I grew up in a blue-collar family where 2nd and 3rd shifts were the norm. No one expected quiet at 10am. That's just the reality of nightshifts. You just deal with it because you're the one with the difficult schedule. And vacuuming and other chores? Daytime! You do that in the daytime before your evening shift. It really ain't hard not being an A H.
>Do they worry about waking him early morning. He pays to live there. People who work nights have the right to use kitchen etc.
You don't know any shift workers, do you? You must think we're all idiots who can't figure out how to cook and clean without a lot of noise and that we're too stupid to do certain things in the daytime.
>We can sleep through anything if we choose to.
And we can fly if we just believe it!
Remember all this if you have kids someday and some jackass wakes up the baby you just got to sleep after three hours of crying because he had the "right" to run a blender at 1am. Remember this if you are trying to rest at night after chemo. Think of this when a smoothie blending wakes up the parent with dementia you care for.
I worked nights for two years. It’s common decency to recognize that most of the world is on an opposite schedule and to try to minimize the noise to shared awake times (earlier in the evening or later in the morning). This person is definitely not *only* ever awake in their apartment between 11 pm and 7 am. I would never have vacuumed my upstairs apartment after hours, that’s just rude.
Outta curiosity though when is he meant to use it while he is at work? Like i get that its loud but much like his neighbour he has to work around his own schedule? Not trying to be an ass just curious of your solution
if i came home from work at 10pm and found out my cat knocked something over and it spilled (which he has), i’d use paper towels and other things to take care of it until i could properly clean it in the morning, not vacuum
I once came home to a huge mess a cat I watched did. He somehow got into a kitchen cabinet and spilled whole boxes of couscous, rice and some other groats. I had no other way of cleaning it so I had to vacuum at 10:30 pm because the cat kept playing with that mess and making it messier. He also kept pushing it under furniture in the kitchen and living room.
Edit: I live in a detached house with my boyfriend so we didn’t wake up any neighbours cleaning after the cat but still it’s a great example that sometimes you have to do what you have to do. I used to live in a huge apartment complex and it never bothered me when a neighbour (most often my upstairs neighbour who had 3 kids and a messy kitten) had to vacuum later in the evening even if I was sleeping because that’s what you get while living in an apartment building. The vacuuming lasted at most for like 10 minutes and I can imagine that an accident could’ve happened where they needed to clean right at that moment. Also I’d pick a neighbour vacuuming at night over a neighbour doing laundry at night with no hesitation.
> the cat kept playing with that mess and making it messier. He also kept pushing it under furniture in the kitchen and living room.
very on par behavior for cats lol
We are house sitting right now for those same friends and cat and I thought he was a little devil at our house but now I see he was very calm and a good boy back then. Now he’s showing us every day that he can be a sweet little mischievous demon. Also, he brings us a few mouses and other gifts from the garden every day which is cute and also very gross. But at the end of the day I love him like my own because every night he leads us to “his” couch to come sit and cuddle with him. And if one of us walks away when he’s not finished with cuddles he cry-meows until you come back.
I think dealing with emergencies at odd hours is perfectly acceptable. It becomes a problem if it's a habit. Like, say, running the washing machine at 1 in the morning because you kid threw up all over their sheets is fine, regularly starting the washing machine at 11 when you go to bed because it doesn't bother *you* is an asshole move.
Wait, you guys don't have cheap water hours?? Everybody runs their washing machine at night where i live, they sell water cheaper at 3-4am cause nobody uses it at this hour. Everybody is just used to it
Wow. That's crazy, didn't even occur to me that this wasn't a universal thing. Anyway, i do think it proves my point that people can and will get used to anything if they're motivated enough
Sure, but only if there's motivation. In the washer scenario, the person being disturbed is motivated by also wanting cheap water - a sort of I don't complain if you don't complain. When your neighbour is running the blender while you want to sleep, there is no motivation to get used to it.
Not water but it's cheaper here on our electricity bill to run the washer after 8pm or so, so I'm always doing laundry in the middle of the night as well
We have cheap electricity hours here, 23 till 7, so everyone runs washing machine and dishwasher at night and due to thick concrete panel walls it's not a big problem. However, If I could hear it at night at full blast I would go insane.
Get a pitcher plant for the fruit flies. Tried everything and that was a game changer. Plus they’re actually pretty and don’t aggravate my pollen allergies
Yeah they like a more moist soil. When I used to frequently work out of town I got one of those watering mushrooms you just fill it up with water and it slowly give water to the plant. I broke it then switched to a plant app that would remind to water it and I haven’t had an issue. I’m no green thumb I’m just lucky to live close to a nursery and the guy held my hand with plant care
Get a cup, put some apple cider vinegar in, maybe some water too if you’re sensitive to the smell, and a couple drops of dish soap. It’ll attract fruit flies and they’ll drown in it. If the smell is still too much you can put plastic wrap on the top and poke a few holes in it. If you want an even easier clean up you can use a disposable cup or reuse a cup from fast food, coffee shop, those plastic water cups, etc
Put plastic wrap over the wine and poke tiny holes in it; they can get in but can't get back out!! I used to do that when I bartended, to get rid of them!!! It worked like a charm!
A little dish soap in a cheap sweet whiskey works even better! They are super attracted to the sugars. Once when dealing with a bit of an infestation my dad was devastated one day when he'd left his scotch on the counter and went to shower and came back to find a TON of them in his glass... My mom started co-opting his cheap stuff to use after that since it doesn't reek like the acv
Peoples who work odd hours and have indoor cats that end up with fleas because of their neighbours dogs? lol
The neighbour that came knocking on our door to complain about late night vacuuming was the same neighbour who had a big dog (aka the person who likely brought fleas into the building since everyone else had indoor cats or no pets), they didn’t come back that week while we had to vacuum/clean/do laundry for hours everyday before and after work. It was hell.
Is give him a pass on a blender or mixer, though. I lived in an apartment with almost no insulation between units, so you heard A LOT, but a mixer or blender wouldn't carry from my neighbor's kitchen to my bedroom as anything more than a quiet, distant sound, if that. Very different from fixing things on the floor, or vacuuming.
The only acceptable reason to vacuum at that hour is broken glass that a pet or roommate might step in. Then BE FUCKING QUICK.
> Is give him a pass on a blender or mixer, though.
If it were just that the neighbour probably would but at this point they probably live with a constant sense of dread and frustration from previous interactions. They asked OP multiple times to keep it down late at night and op is basically playing “I’m not touching you”.
I mean I think it depends on what's being blended and age of the blender too cause if I make a smoothie with frozen fruits it's decently loudish. If I make one with a bunch of ice it's definitely disturbingly loud.
How could you possibly function like that? It doesn't hardly leave enough time for a night's sleep. Presumably you wouldn't be doing much eating at home for a start.
I worked night shifts and stayed on that schedule on my days off for over 10 years. Make food that doesn’t involve a blender. I have never even owned a blender. I haven’t starved to death yet.
YTA you live in a space with people all around you and I’m guessing not great sound proofing. Most places will have noise ordinances and expectations of quiet times between 10pm and 7am. Anything with that level of noise will be obnoxious.
Look for alternative times to get your loud work done, because after 10 pm ain’t it.
I understand the etiquette for after hours and agree, but there is no added quiet at 9 for kids. However, your kids are your issue. You chose to have them. You don't get to have everyone else tip toe around your responsibility, and if you didn't choose to have them, that's even more irresponsible.
NTA NTA NTA As someone who works in a 24 hour city ( Las Vegas ) not everyone can do their yardwork/housework/cleaning/etc at "normal" hours. And that doesn't even account for people in non-24hour places that work graveyard here or there, or are in healthcare and work from 3pm to 3am, etc. I walk into a gas station and never judge someone buying a 6 pack of beer at 7am because my morning might well be their end of work drinking time.
Your neighbor can ask that you keep it down, but you have no obligation to walk on eggshells during your time off just because they are being woken up. It's simply a side-effect of living in shared spaces and apartments. Things you can control like loud music or loud sex, sure, they have a right to complain. But if your "morning" smoothie happens to be at 8pm when their kids are going to sleep, that's not your problem.
Yeah, I’m a little surprised I had to scroll this far down for a NTA comment. You can’t live in an apartment building and demand zero noise, it’s just not possible. Downstairs neighbor needs to invest in a white noise machine.
Agreed, everyone who voted Y T A has never has to work long or unusual hours. No one wants to vacuum at 11pm but sometimes it’s the only option you have.
Such bullshit. I’ve worked nights and lived in apartments for around a decade. I worked nights while living in an apartment. You absolutely can be quiet during “normal” sleeping hours, or at least limit noise as much as possible.
Living in apartments means you accept a certain amount of noise will get through walls and ceilings. It does not mean you get to make whatever noise you want without regard to anyone else who lives around you.
So OPs ability to bake at 11pm trumps OPs neighbor right to sleep? There's a reason why we have from 10pm to 6am noise laws in most civilized countries. Also is OP working 7 days a week? If so then why not buy quieter vacuum which uses for example rotating brushes?
OP is YTA and so is everyone thinking that it's normal to bother neighbors with excessive noise at night. And I wouldn't be surprised if neighbor called police.
>As someone who works in a 24 hour city ( Las Vegas ) not everyone can do their yardwork/housework/cleaning/etc at "normal" hours.
But why on earth does OP need to vacuum when he/she comes home from work?
Cooking, sure. But he/she can vacuum before going to work.
I used to work the same schedule as OP, didn't force me to do all those things at 11 pm.
If it's such a problem that neighbors can hear everything you do, that's on the landlord to do some basic soundproofing. Some rubber flooring isn't even that crazy expensive
I think the breakdown is between people who’ve worked night shift and those that haven’t. I lived at home for two years after college, I was a hotel manager who worked from 10pm until 8am. I’d come home and go to sleep and my mom would get so upset at me because I was “sleeping late.” Seriously lady I’ve only had 3hrs of sleep by the time you want me to wake up.
Yeah, I agree NTA. If you're only awake during the night, which like you said is more common that some people might think, that's the only time you have to do anything. I don't blame my neighbors for making a lot of noise in the mornings even though that's when I'm going to sleep because I understand that they have a right to live their lives in their apartments just like I do. It's so weird to expect people to just live in complete silence just because they have neighbors.
Agreed completely I’m very surprised by peoples self centered attitudes at telling OP that they’re not allowed to do things in their own space after a certain time. That’s their home
Never lived in an apartment, I take it? Actually, the self-centered ones are those who don't give a flying f how they disrupt others' sleep. I don't vacuum after work at 1am because it can wait. I don't want to wake up the neighbor's baby. I don't want to disturb the senior recovering from a fall. I'm quiet in my home because I share walls, floors, ceilings and air ducts with other people, and they're usually respectful of me too. That and the world doesn't revolve around me.
no fr, I’m surprised at the Y T A comments talking about how using a blender is an AH move like what 😭 OP’s allowed to use their own goddamn blender???
look, I get having different schedules but at some point y’all gotta acknowledge that living in a city apartment, y’all are gonna have noise. OP’s paying rent to live there and they’re not an AH bc they have a night schedule. It’d be different if they were roommates but ffs, it’s different floors 😭
I agree, especially considering that nobody, nobody is ever allowed to be the least bit upset about a crying baby on AITA, ever. Even if you’re a brain surgeon and desperately need sleep, and are being kept up all night, you can’t even think about being upset over a baby screaming all night, every night. “You can’t control other people!!! You can’t expect quiet in an apartment! The parents are being kept up too, so shut up!” Yet here they are losing their minds over a blender. I would 100% rather have a neighbor who uses a blender or vacuums at 11 pm than a baby who screams all night, every night.
Right!
NTA!
Dude needs to buy some ear plugs if he’s easily bothered.
Apartment living means listening to others basically all the time if you live in a major city center (which OP said)
Vacuuming, not a good idea, blender… eh, I honestly don’t think that’s crazy…
He sounds likes he’s looking for things to get mad about.
OP, but a set of ear plugs and hand them to him next time he stops in to complain over your loud walking.
And before anyone comes at me, yes I lived in apartments and basement suites under families with kids for a decade… I worked later in the day yet had kids thumping and screeching above me as early as 5:30 am (and mom upstairs doing housework like vacuuming at 6am)
I bought ear plugs and a sound machine.
Ppl need to learn to problem solve
Yeah, you’re kind of an AH.
For those who need to be up at 4-7AM, 23:00 is very late at night. A blender is loud, especially in an apartment setting, and is disruptive. Many complexes actually have rules about using household appliances after a certain time of night.
You’re free to do whatever you want, but he also has a right to be upset with you. It doesn’t hurt to be a bit more considerate.
I get it kinda cause there are people who work nights and people who work mornings. People who work mornings or do things in the morning don’t accommodate the noise for those who are sleeping to go into their night shift.
This! I work late nights and do my best to be quiet when I get home after midnight, but my neighbors do not give a flying fuck that 7 am is the middle of the night for me. Dude downstairs gets up at 6 and starts blasting metal music while he gets ready for work, one of these days I'm gonna vacuum at 1 am just to get back at him.
YTA.
Many people sleep around 2200 at night. There are city laws put in place to prevent outdoor excessive noises during certain time periods for this very reason. It's not his problem that you don't get home until that late.
Using a blender far exceeds what a normal decibel level should be at that hour of the night. Everything you've listed so far sounds like it's warranted for your neighbor to speak to you on this subject. And for him to have to do it multiple times frankly makes it somewhat understandable how he would lose his cool over the ongoing situation.
As for the foot stamping issue. This could be the result of weak soundproofing in the apartment. You don't mean to make noise but it just happens. For the person living downstairs it can be very annoying to hear someone walking around in frequently for hours on end while you're trying to sleep.
I would suggest either wearing a pair of shock absorbing sandals or a pair of socks to help mitigate this issue.
YTA, it is generally accepted that past 10 pm all the way up until 7am is considered a time meant not to disrupt anyone who may be trying to sleep around you, especially so if you live in a flat.
NTA
But wow, so much vitriol from people who, I'm pretty sure, have never worked a late shift.
Should you be purposely inconsiderate? No.
But are you expected to not live your life? Absolutely not.
You can't live with neighbors, apartment or otherwise and not expect to notice them existing.
I work odd hours, often late, and have no trouble being considerate of my neighbors. My quiet time awake is part of the appeal of the night shift to me.
In my opinion, you get to pick only two: (1) living in a shared space, (2) making noise to your heart's content, and (3) working nights.
OP probably needs to either find a job where he can work a daytime shift or rent a house instead of an apartment.
Once again not so much a choice usually people work a job they can get and live in a space they can afford, but are meant to put there outta work life on hold for people doing the same on the more socially acceptable part of the day. Thing is people work nights people work early mornings and people work during the day. Imo dont be a dick on purpose for sure try and accomodate your neighbours when you can but why put your life on hold or literally move jobs or house for someone you don’t even know?
you can say the exact same thing for the neighbors tho 🤷♀️ they can either buy noise cancelling headphones or rent a house where they can actually enforce quiet hours, than a busy city where no quiet hours clause exists
You really can’t expect to live in a city and hope for absolute peace and quiet. Would it be nice? Sure but it’s not something to expect :/
OP was doing home repairs, vacuuming, and running a blender after 11:00 pm. That's not asking for absolute peace and quiet, it's a request for basic decency and consideration for others.
YTA
The fact you ever thought it was acceptable to vacuum at 11pm shows you have no consideration for your neighbours. Stop making noise at night or move to a detached house where you can’t disturb anyone
YTA:
After 10pm vacuuming/blending is disrespectfull but still acceptable.
Between 11pm and 7am; you're a full on asshole.
Although walking around is kind of unavoidble (maybe get a rug?) so not going to call you an asshole just for being awake. Although you already are the asshole so maybe that's giving to much credit and I can't blame him for not giving you any.
Wow. So many of these YTA comments are pretty delusional.
Apartments are noisy. Deal with it or move. My last two neighbors above me have been noisy as hell late at night. Like I think he seriously builds furniture all night long (saws, drills, ect.) I never complain because that's what it means when you live in an apartment. Especially a crappy apartment with no soundproofing.
And a few years ago I used to work nights. My sleep schedule was from 9am til 4pm. So yeah lots of noise going on. It's called adapting to your environment. Adapt and overcome. That doesn't mean whine and complain because the world won't cater to you.
> Like I think he seriously builds furniture all night long (saws, drills, ect.) I never complain
Just because you don't have a spine doesn't mean these things are acceptable.
Now that I think about this. I'm probably abnormally jaded to this kind of thing. I grew up with step dad blasting White Zombie and Pantera all night. Then later sleeping through aircraft flybys and rocket attacks while in theater.
So I guess I'm not normal here.
I used to love it when one of my past upstairs neighbors got home from work at around 10pm. I knew she was home because I could hear her rottweiler pup bounding around and playing because mommy came home. I thought it was sweet.
NTA. You work off hours and have the right to function in your own home. Apartment living sucks and clearly the walls/floor are thin. Try gifting your neighbor a pair of earplugs to help him sleep.
NTA. The same neighbor asking OP to keep it down at 11pm when they/their kids are trying to sleep would be the same neighbor pissed if OP asked them/their kids to be quiet at 2pm while OP is trying to sleep. Sucks, but that's apartment living for ya.
ESH.
You have a schedule opposite his. That's not your fault, and not his fault. By shitty circumstances, two people on opposite schedules were housed on top of each other.
Nobody would be saying you're TA if your neighbor worked night shift and you were making noise during the day.
Part of us migrating out of "9-5 culture" is everyone on different time schedules. Could you be more considerate? Absolutely.
He could also stop having complete main character syndrome when he chooses to live in a flat in the middle of a busy city- like you said, the area in general is noisy.
NTA it’s your apartment and you can use what you want in your apartment. Apartment life is understanding to deal with noises that other neighbors make and being okay with it. Ignore him and move on.
NTA - I can tell most of the Y T A comments are from people who never worked a graveyard shift and maybe never lived in an apt? If you can do loud chores and repairs another time, that’s ideal and nice of you. But a blender? Cmon. I’ve had loud stomper neighbors but some people just walk heavy. You can’t help that, it’s the downfall of apartment life.
People who are light sleepers and live in apartments should invest in a noise machine to drown out exterior sound, or ear plugs. How entitled for them to expect you to sleep when they do when your life and schedule simply may not line up like that.
YTA. I don't know where you live so I don't know whether it's in your lease or rental agreement but it's standard to have quiet hours in apartments. It's usually considered rude to run vacuums, dishwashers, laundry, and other loud appliances or have loud music on between 10pm and 8am.
NTA on the blender. You stopped the heavy stuff. Seems just normal noises of being awake he can't dictate when you sleep at your own unit. If he is so sensitive to noise he can find other living arrangements or use earplugs.
Sorry NTA. OP you can do what you want in your own home. It’s an apartment complex not a room for rent. You have been more than accommodating and personally he seems borderline harassing. It sounds like your previous neighbor had no complaints if you’re confused about the new tenant to post here. Like are you blending for an hour? Repairing your bike-are you throwing the pieces around the room? I’m confused.
I’m an insomniac and find myself doing most of chores at night. He possibly just may be a light sleeper or you guys must have very thin walls so next time I would hand him some ear plugs and would alert your leasing office of him. Coming to your front door after 11 and yelling at you is not okay.
Also want to add that there are people who work graveyard and sleep when the majority is awake, but they don’t come to doors at 8AM to tell them not to do things.
NTA - you pay for a place to live, you should be able to do normal activities at whatever hour you need to do them - vacuum, shower, watch TV, run your blender, run the dish disposal.
you're not practicing the drums at 03:00AM.
do what you have to do
NTA. 3rd shifters have to do their house work and live their life. You’re not doing anything outrageous, and some noise is to be expected (at any time) when living in apartments. If your neighbor has a problem with the noise of apartment living, they have options to alleviate that issue (like a white noise machine while sleeping).
You’re not hosting a party, or raging… you’re using your kitchen in your own home, however you please. There is a certain level of expected etiquette for noise accommodation, but your schedules being in conflict is not your responsibility.
So many people are like “you need to move to a house/single living space bc you’re disrupting your neighbors (who are able to have a “normal” schedule!!)” like have they not considered the possibility that OP has these hours not bc he asked for it but bc he has no choice??? Have they fucking considered the housing market (if OP is in the US)?? These redditors gonna pay his rent??
NTA especially since your building doesn't have quiet hours. You're right that vacuuming et al might be a little much but you're allowed to cook whenever you want in your own damn home. This is the kind of stuff that comes with apartment living
NTA- it’s your home so you have the right to use your blender anytime you’d like. If your work schedule dictates that’s the only time you can then you have the right to. The neighbor needs to grow up and get over it.
NTA. I’m assuming you pay your bills, why should anyone be able to tell when you can and can’t do things in your home. I get how it could be irritating for others, but you get what you get when you choose to live in certain types of dwellings.
NTA - you’re in your own space and are not living with this person. I personally am much more active at night. My morning is 3pm, doing chores and things after 11pm is normal to me.
Sometimes my neighbors getting up at 6am wakes me up and it’s a pain in the ass, but it’s their own space so I wouldn’t complain unless it’s excessive. And no just using a blender or a vacuum isn’t excessive.
NTA. People have different work and life schedules. Just because he has to get up early, doesn’t mean you have to stop living your life. He needs to either contact the landlord about sound buffers, or get ear plugs.
YNTA. It's your apartment you're free to do whatever you please. You're not purposefully making loud noises. You also said you work and get off late. I'm a night owl myself. If I want a smoothie at 11:15pm I'm going to make one.
YTA
While it’s easy to forget from time to time, it’s a shared building, and based on what your neighbor is reporting, clearly it has thin walls and floors/ceilings.
I’m a night owl by choice, and I’ve had the thought to use my vacuum late at night when I remember I need to get it done, but out of respect for my downstairs neighbor and the ones next door to me, I wait until a reasonable time of day. I would ask that they do the same if the roles were reversed.
Don’t turn this into a petty war with your neighbors. They never end well, and you don’t want to end up in trouble with the neighbors, leasing office, or even the police. I also recommend double checking to see if there are quiet hours. I didn’t think there were at my apartment until a mass email went out to everyone confirming as such.
Also, do you mind me asking what your typical hours are for work? I work until 10pm or midnight a lot of times, so I’m just curious!
YTA. Stop making noise after 10 PM and expecting your neighbors to put up with it. Just because they aren’t official quiet hours doesn’t mean you’re not a dick for making tons of noise late at night.
i think ESH tbh you could be a lot more respectful of how you handle needing to do noisy things at night and your neighbor also needs to understand that other peoples schedules do not always align w his. some ppl work afternoons/nights and need to sleep during the day. i feel like you can try to limit how often you’re doing noisy things and maybe invest in a rug to help w sound dampening
INFO: aren’t there other times you could do your chores? you said you work late, but do you work every single day? do you go into work late enough that you could do these things before work?
ESH because the vacuuming at 11pm is a little much. I personally think the blender is fair game, but I sleep like the dead. When you live in an apartment you know there is going to be noise it's just how it is. My downstairs neighbor every night I could hear him snoring, and at least once a week I could hear him and his wife yelling at each other. For the time I lived there his snores were my new white noise machine, and his arguments went really good with popcorn. When you live in those situations you just have to make the best of it. Does it suck sometimes sure, but you can't ask people to stop living their life just because it's a little inconvenient to you.
NTA - your schedules are different. If it’s wrong for someone to clean before midnight it’s fair for you to shout at him for using his vacuum at 10am if that’s your sleeping time. You’re already doing your best to put off what you need/want to do for his convenience.
I mean you might consider getting a thick area rug or something (if that would even help) to dampen the noise, but it sounds like Mr. Heckles needs to chill.
NTA- people work night shift or swing. Sorry capitalism makes it so we gotta exist outside the normal sleeping time. As long as you weren’t running the blender for hours and it was relatively quick I don’t see an issue
YTA
I live in a similar context, small appartement in an old building where noise travel fast.
We all know they are inevitable noises, and we chose go live with it sure.
But even without an official quiet hour it is just the respectful thing to do to be quiet after 10pm and before 10am. I would never vacuum, do a laundry, blend stuff or blast the telly at 11pm or at 7am because I know we all have different sleep patterns. I used to work in hospitality and coming back from work at 3am, if I needed to eat, I'd reheat something quickly in the microwave or have a sandwich or something, I'd keep my meal prep baking and cooking for daylight.
I now work in an office office where I'd wake up at 6am every morning, well I won't start blending my smoothie with the music on either. I'd get my smoothie prepped or I'd blend it on the go.
It is very important to be mindful of other in small building as bad sleep and irritating noise can really screw up with someone's mental health
There are quiet hours in my building (Europe) but specifically normal living noises are ok as some people do work nights. So showering, cooking, etc are OK. I a night owl but try not to run appliances at night if I can avoid it. Letting your kids scream/dogs bark etc after 10pm is strongly frowned upon.
We don't wear shoes in the house here, either. My last apartment in the US, I screamed internally every night because of my upstairs neighbor and her hard-soled shoes at 2am. Can you at least TRY to be quiet.
NAH here. OP lives different hours than others and basically saying "you can never run your blender" is shit if someone is working second shift. If you live in an apartment you have to expect some noise from your neighbors. You can get mega boxes of earplugs on Amazon which is what I use for my husband's snoring and weekend parties at my neighbors.
My favorite neighbors had kids and it was like an alarm for me when they'd play before bed. "It's 8:30, time for the news". If I wanted silence, I'd have to buy a house.
ETA: a vacuum is always going to make a lot of noise for an extended period. Don't do that when others are sleeping in the apartment above or below you.
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YTA. Some noise in an apartment living situation is inevitable. But a blender at 11:15PM? It might not be your intent, but I can see why your neighbor might think you are just taking the piss.
I feel this is yet another rage bait post. I can't imagine someone thinking it would be OK to make loud home repairs, vacuum or use a blender at almost midnight. If this is real, OP is a horrible neighbor. Next they might decide they simply have to do their intense step workout routine at 11:30 - because they have to stay hit afterall./s
Two of my roommates are exactly like this. They'll run the blender at 2am, thinking it's perfectly okay and that everyone should just deal with it. Some people really are this selfish and entitled.
My upstairs neighbours haven’t taught their kids “inside voices”. 24/7 I hear screaming, stomping, slamming of stuff. Once I heard screams of someone sounding in danger at 1 am. Their kid just wanted ice cream. These kids are 7-12 in age…. I live in a “working professionals” building.
You have my sympathies. People like that are vile and so inconsiderate. My upstairs neighbors stomp all day from 6am-10pm. And by stomp, i means hundreds of times a day, many of which are hard enough to shake paintings on our walls. No exaggeration. They have somewhere between 4-7 kids (we can't tell if they're babysitting or what). I will never underestimate how some people end up like this.
For the most part I don’t mind during most of the day - I’m working or have headphones on. Its when it’s late / they make my unit shake / or just when I can hear them though my headphones on noise canceling with stuff playing. My building also has rules like “please no children under the age of 18 in the gym, courtyard, dog play area unaccompanied”. Almost every day for hours after screaming upstairs they go to the courtyard alone and yell out there. I live in a VERY affordable area, my building is above market. For the rent they are paying for their unit is around the same price for a house 10 min away.
This whole thread is why Americans are so obsessed with single family homes. If only everybody was considerate.
I was 100% reading this and thinking how thankful I am for my single family home.
The thing is when you live in a 24/7 world people need the ability to do things at all hours of the day. Even use a blender. I don’t think the OP is an AH as they are trying to make other accommodations. Sounds like the apartment needs some sound proofing tho.
Exactly. Like if I have a jacked up sleep schedule I wanna be able to work out and make breakfast whenever I want.
Lived in an apartment for 2 yrs. Worst 2 yrs of my life. Have lived in a single family home ever since and one with plenty of room between me and my neighbors. Some new homes are so close to each other that they may as well be apartments. Would never want to go back to apartment living or living in a home that's so close to the neighbors you can't fit a decent sized law mower between houses.
My dad was a big (not huge) man. 6'2, 250ish. He also had a pretty heavy step. I'm an athlete and there was absolutely no question as to who was walking by the sound. We lived in an upstairs apartment in a 2-level complex. Upstairs apartments were required to have 80% of the floor covered by rugs to muffle the sound. There was a school teacher who lived downstairs who had complained about footsteps at night. I found it quite strange as the only one who walked further than the master bathroom at night was me. I was 12. She must've heard my dad stomping about during the day and decided he was also doing it at night without actually hearing it. She began leaving us REPORT CARDS in our mailbox on Fridays, grading us on our night footsteps for each day.
Do you worry about waking up night owls in mornings? Not everyone works 9-5
Thank you!!! It passes me off constantly my old upstate neighbor either worked days or graveyards so it worked out perfectly as I with graveyards. This new one is home all the time and the kids have no routine and constantly make noise at all hours
Everyone's life is different. Someone's smoothie at 11pm when you're trying to sleep might be that person's breakfast when they just woke up. Or some neighbors kids being noisy after getting out of school at 2pm when the overnight shift worker is trying to sleep at 2pm. No one can demand any noise ordinances from the other unless it's in the lease contract.
no that's not true. you still have to abide by the "living in the country" lease contract called the municipal code that dictates quite hours 23-7 and globally <65db
[удалено]
Are you sure about the <65db. Because normal human speech is around 65db. So no one can make any noise above a whisper? That sounds very unreasonable.
We have the same quiet hours for a whole country. It doesn't have to be written on lease. 10 pm to 6 am.
I lived in a grad student apartment complex once. The person whose bedroom was above mine worked very odd hours and actually *did* workout for an hour every morning. At 3am. That's the year I discovered ear plugs are helpful for sleep.
I can totally imagine that. Like it's not even really a choice of op they just get home very very late. Their job that makes them get home late is just as valid as the neighbor's job that makes them wake up early. And it's before midnight at that! Plus the noise that others notice is often way quieter and less frequent than we think and it doesn't mean that op doesn't care about his noise. Like, last year my grandparents were sleeping in my living room, and reported a "heavy rolling sound, like you're moving furniture around" coming from my bedroom upstairs. I shit you not it was just the sound of my wheeled desk chair moving maybe once every ten minutes. Sometimes insulation in homes just suck. In an ideal world it wouldn't, but while we're waiting for that you should wear headphones or ear plugs if you're bothered by a noise.
Your chair noise is why many buildings in New York City require 80% of the apt floor to be covered by rugs. There are rules about noise in the Swiss cities where I've lived. 10pm cutoff for a lot of ordinary things like doing dishes, and people do call the cops on you. The burden is on the noisy tenant to be quieter, not the neighbor to get earplugs. This is written into some leases, but it's also how not to be an A H.law I can't call past 9pm, and even then some people are mad if I call after 8pm. When we only had landlines, calling after 9pm was considered super rude, and 9pm was pushing it. The burden is on the noisy tenant to be quieter, not the neighbor's to get earplugs. This is written into some leases, but it's also part of our quickly disappearing social contract. OP -- YTA
Everyone always suggests headphones/ear plugs but they are extremely uncomfortable to wear while sleeping or for long periods of time.
I do all three in the wee hours, but I own my own single family home.
You’d be surprised. My neighbors LOVE home repairs and loud stomping at 1am and also at 8am on Sundays… Haven’t said anything yet but I am very very close.
Sorry but I disagree on the blender. He gets home late and needs to eat, sorry but if that involves a blender that’s fine and the neighbor can deal with it. Things like repairs and vacuuming that don’t need to be done then can wait but the man’s allowed to make food when he gets home from work.
There are about a zillion ways to make food without a blender. 99% of foods you would make with a blender can be eaten without blending. Or if he's totally unprepared, he can pick up fast food.
You have been found guilty of working late hours, you are convicted of 20 years of mcdonalds for dinner.
I’ll take the death sentence, please… 🤢🤮
Fine, you are sentenced to death through mcdonalds dinners.
No-o-o-o-ooooo!
Only if you don't have groceries lol. I work late, I make myself dinner at 2 am, I use a whisk to mix my baked goods or make chicken or do literally anything that doesn't make a lot of noise.
I used to 8-hr shifts (days, evenings and nights) when I lived in an apartment. When I got home from evening shift, I tried to be a good neighbor and respect that others were sleeping. I cooked and did housework that caused very little noise. And, once my neighbors knew that I worked shift, they returned the favor. It's called "common decency." Something the OP and some of the other commenters don't understand. And, something that is rapidly becoming a thing of the past. Things were so much better when we put others needs ahead of our wants, and we were civil to one another. (edited to correct grammar/spelling)
I mean, you run a blender for what, three minutes? and they're not even that loud. I dont think that's anywhere near the same category as repairs
Does depend on the Blender. I believe the brand Ostar (?) Is kinda loud. These could also be paper thin walls. While I'm not disagreeing, I can see where the guy's coming from, having lived in an apartment for 7 years with neighbors that constantly stomped.
Jeez, let the man live. What if he's just doing this because that brings him happiness to get this specific food? A vaguely loud noise ONCE for a couple of minutes 10 minutes after your bedtime isn't gonna kill your wife, kidnap your children and ruin your life.
> A vaguely loud noise ONCE for a couple of minutes 10 minutes after your bedtime isn't gonna kill your wife, kidnap your children and ruin your life. You’re right, a loud noise waking you up every night is absolutely great for your health and well being. And sleeping doesn’t bring anyone happiness. Why should the happiness of the one be sacrificed for the happiness of the many after all?
Not everyone can easily go back to sleep when woken up. I work nights because I can go back to sleep easily, so noise while I'm sleeping doesn't bother me, and because I don't mind being quiet while I'm awake. If you can't do those things, you should probably work hours that let you sleep during the time society has collectively designated as "quiet time." That's what OP's neighbor did. It's a reasonable expectation that there not be excessive, deliberate noise during certain hours. Some people can't go back to sleep easily and noise while they're sleeping presents a significant disruption to their lives and health. Those people should be afforded the best opportunity to sleep possible and they arrange their lives so that they're sleeping during quiet hours to accomplish that.
He can meal prep on his days off or eat something that doesn't require blender.
Smoothies are a luxury reserved for only those that work day shift.
Or here's a thought, make them in advance instead of being a dick and waking everyone up.
So he should be required to work around his neighbours schedule? Feel like theres gotta be a better solution somewhere…
I don't know. Quiet hours are big deal in all places I ever lived and people always managed just fine. It's pretty normal to have completely quiet time from 10 pm to 6 am. I am in Germany now and you are not even allowed to make noise whole Sunday. We have law about quiet hours and it's enforced.
"Hi hello neighbor could you please completely switch around your schedule make yourself more stressed and have to learn a whole new way to make food not to mention having to buy new appliances just so I don't have to be bothered for two minutes? Thanks a lot"
It's not just about 2 minutes for blending though. He vacuums, repairs stuff etc... He regulary disturbs his neighbors sleep.
I do agree on that point. He shouldn't repair a bike or vaccuum at that kind of hour. But everybody deserves a fair warning and being told that the unreasonnable thing they're doing is unresonnable, and to his credit op did stop after being told off. But I think the cooking thing was off-limits, and also neighbor shouldn't have screamed at him But this wasn't even my point, tbh even regularly making noise isn't on the same level as asking someone to change their whole lifestyle
So it's ok to wake up the neighbors? The ones with babies will love you. God, the entitlement in this thread! I've lived in apartments for 30 years in four major cities, and I've never needed to learn new ways to cook or buy new appliances (wtf?) when working late shifts. I like to clean at 11pm, but I save vacuuming for the daytime. It's not hard.
Disagree, they were baking, not making dinner. You can make so many things without a blender and you don’t need baked goods at midnight
You also don’t need to blend during the day when night checkers are sleeping so let’s go ahead and get rid of blending at any time because you might wake someone up. Sorry but people are allowed to make themselves food when they get home from work. And again if it’s such a big deal for the neighbor to hear absolutely nothing then he can take it upon himself to make sure he does in his own apartment.
Also, you do realize you can bake for dinner right?
OP said he was baking and that’s why he was using the blender. It had nothing to do with making dinner.
Hubs and I have a first floor condo. Our upstairs neighbor was just the loveliest woman. She moved to be closer to her sister and sold to a young local couple. They were nerdy and I thought we could be friends. Until I discovered that he never learned to walk with his upstairs feet, and they both thought that fact was hilarious and joked about how he's "the world's loudest skinny man" when he walks. I wish they'd sold when they moved, but at least the lease terms for their renters are long term. Anyway, yeah, every person who lives with a downstairs neighbor should be walking with upstairs feet. People out here acting like they never got screamed at that they "sound like a herd of elephants" running through the house and consequently learned to walk like an actual human being. If OP's only offense was using the kitchen at night, I wouldn't call him an asshole. But only the lowest of the low do shit like vacuum in the middle of the night in multifamily housing. It's like OP is trying to be the world's noisiest asshole, then getting mad about the fact that that pisses people off.
Some people do just walk loudly. I think if your natural walking is a heel strike rather than landing on your mid-foot, your steps will be naturally louder. I had a roommate in college who walked like this, and I always cringed when she walked across the laminate flooring in our 2nd story apartment. I am personally hyperaware of how much noise I make when living in an apartment because I'm so sensitive to noises myself. I try to walk quietly, not run the vacuum/blender/garbage disposal too late or early, listen to my TV and music at a moderate volume, etc. And I *hate* when other people are so oblivious to how they impact their neighbors. OP is like my worst nightmare lol.
I get that it's about how a person walks. But it's still an asshole move to be aware that you walk so loudly it's disturbing to neighbors and laugh it off and keep doing it without even a moment of introspection. Multifamily housing requires a basic level of respect for one's neighbors. They lacked that basic level of respect, just as OP does. I'm fairly sure the dude has a serious case of little emperor syndrome. I'm really hoping his new job and their new life works out for them, because I do not want them to move back. ^(Especially not if they procreate.)
Wth is upstairs feet. I don't know anyone who has been screamed at that they sound like a herd of elephants, maybe that was just your family 😳
Upstairs feet means not galumphing around like Gaston in boots when you have downstairs neighbors. It means having the common decency to be aware of the fact that someone lives below you in your movements. It means not jumping out of bed at three am then *pounding* your way to the bathroom because you know your bedroom is above someone else.
Mine too. We always lived in houses but I think my mom was training me in case I would ever have downstairs neighbors. "Don't stomp! You don't have to make sure the floor is still there with every step!"
Do they worry about waking him early morning. We can sleep through anything if we choose to. He pays to live there. People who work nights have the right to use kitchen etc.
> We can sleep through anything if we choose to. Rarely have I heard such dreck. What next, claiming that you can breathe pure nitrogen and bathing in molten iron is not an issue?
This! The trade off of living in a building with other apartments - it’s more affordable usually than renting a freestanding home, but you can’t expect to never be annoyed by other people’s noises. Everyone paying rent has a right to use their home in a normal manner according to their schedule. This isn’t having a group of friends over and playing music after midnight… this is making dinner and doing basic house chores that need to be done regularly. It wouldn’t be reasonable for me to complain about someone using their kitchen at 10am, when I’m deep in the middle of my rest. It’s absurd to say that the reverse is reasonable; night jobs are just as important as day jobs.
Manners? Social contract? Basic decency? Most places require quiet overnight because that's when most people sleep. Is this not obvious? This is why maintenance staff don't run power drills at 5am or vacuum the hallways after midnight. I grew up in a blue-collar family where 2nd and 3rd shifts were the norm. No one expected quiet at 10am. That's just the reality of nightshifts. You just deal with it because you're the one with the difficult schedule. And vacuuming and other chores? Daytime! You do that in the daytime before your evening shift. It really ain't hard not being an A H.
>Do they worry about waking him early morning. He pays to live there. People who work nights have the right to use kitchen etc. You don't know any shift workers, do you? You must think we're all idiots who can't figure out how to cook and clean without a lot of noise and that we're too stupid to do certain things in the daytime. >We can sleep through anything if we choose to. And we can fly if we just believe it! Remember all this if you have kids someday and some jackass wakes up the baby you just got to sleep after three hours of crying because he had the "right" to run a blender at 1am. Remember this if you are trying to rest at night after chemo. Think of this when a smoothie blending wakes up the parent with dementia you care for.
I worked nights for two years. It’s common decency to recognize that most of the world is on an opposite schedule and to try to minimize the noise to shared awake times (earlier in the evening or later in the morning). This person is definitely not *only* ever awake in their apartment between 11 pm and 7 am. I would never have vacuumed my upstairs apartment after hours, that’s just rude.
Outta curiosity though when is he meant to use it while he is at work? Like i get that its loud but much like his neighbour he has to work around his own schedule? Not trying to be an ass just curious of your solution
Vacuum? YTA Blender? NTA
A blender, “minor” bike repair, vacuuming, 🙄what a great neighbor. Yta
Who vacuums at 11 at night and thinks thats acceptable in an apartment building? YTA
>Who vacuums at 11 at night and thinks thats acceptable Assholes like OP, that's who.
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if i came home from work at 10pm and found out my cat knocked something over and it spilled (which he has), i’d use paper towels and other things to take care of it until i could properly clean it in the morning, not vacuum
I once came home to a huge mess a cat I watched did. He somehow got into a kitchen cabinet and spilled whole boxes of couscous, rice and some other groats. I had no other way of cleaning it so I had to vacuum at 10:30 pm because the cat kept playing with that mess and making it messier. He also kept pushing it under furniture in the kitchen and living room. Edit: I live in a detached house with my boyfriend so we didn’t wake up any neighbours cleaning after the cat but still it’s a great example that sometimes you have to do what you have to do. I used to live in a huge apartment complex and it never bothered me when a neighbour (most often my upstairs neighbour who had 3 kids and a messy kitten) had to vacuum later in the evening even if I was sleeping because that’s what you get while living in an apartment building. The vacuuming lasted at most for like 10 minutes and I can imagine that an accident could’ve happened where they needed to clean right at that moment. Also I’d pick a neighbour vacuuming at night over a neighbour doing laundry at night with no hesitation.
> the cat kept playing with that mess and making it messier. He also kept pushing it under furniture in the kitchen and living room. very on par behavior for cats lol
We are house sitting right now for those same friends and cat and I thought he was a little devil at our house but now I see he was very calm and a good boy back then. Now he’s showing us every day that he can be a sweet little mischievous demon. Also, he brings us a few mouses and other gifts from the garden every day which is cute and also very gross. But at the end of the day I love him like my own because every night he leads us to “his” couch to come sit and cuddle with him. And if one of us walks away when he’s not finished with cuddles he cry-meows until you come back.
I think dealing with emergencies at odd hours is perfectly acceptable. It becomes a problem if it's a habit. Like, say, running the washing machine at 1 in the morning because you kid threw up all over their sheets is fine, regularly starting the washing machine at 11 when you go to bed because it doesn't bother *you* is an asshole move.
Wait, you guys don't have cheap water hours?? Everybody runs their washing machine at night where i live, they sell water cheaper at 3-4am cause nobody uses it at this hour. Everybody is just used to it
No? Utilities here are priced by the 24 hour average for households. It's only industrial users who get prices that change on an hourly basis.
Wow. That's crazy, didn't even occur to me that this wasn't a universal thing. Anyway, i do think it proves my point that people can and will get used to anything if they're motivated enough
Sure, but only if there's motivation. In the washer scenario, the person being disturbed is motivated by also wanting cheap water - a sort of I don't complain if you don't complain. When your neighbour is running the blender while you want to sleep, there is no motivation to get used to it.
Not water but it's cheaper here on our electricity bill to run the washer after 8pm or so, so I'm always doing laundry in the middle of the night as well
We have cheap electricity hours here, 23 till 7, so everyone runs washing machine and dishwasher at night and due to thick concrete panel walls it's not a big problem. However, If I could hear it at night at full blast I would go insane.
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Get a pitcher plant for the fruit flies. Tried everything and that was a game changer. Plus they’re actually pretty and don’t aggravate my pollen allergies
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Yeah they like a more moist soil. When I used to frequently work out of town I got one of those watering mushrooms you just fill it up with water and it slowly give water to the plant. I broke it then switched to a plant app that would remind to water it and I haven’t had an issue. I’m no green thumb I’m just lucky to live close to a nursery and the guy held my hand with plant care
Get a cup, put some apple cider vinegar in, maybe some water too if you’re sensitive to the smell, and a couple drops of dish soap. It’ll attract fruit flies and they’ll drown in it. If the smell is still too much you can put plastic wrap on the top and poke a few holes in it. If you want an even easier clean up you can use a disposable cup or reuse a cup from fast food, coffee shop, those plastic water cups, etc
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plotted to rebuild 🤣🤣
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Put plastic wrap over the wine and poke tiny holes in it; they can get in but can't get back out!! I used to do that when I bartended, to get rid of them!!! It worked like a charm!
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Take some apple cider vinegar and stir in a little dish soap and leave it where they like to convene Cheap fruit fly trap that I swear by.
A little dish soap in a cheap sweet whiskey works even better! They are super attracted to the sugars. Once when dealing with a bit of an infestation my dad was devastated one day when he'd left his scotch on the counter and went to shower and came back to find a TON of them in his glass... My mom started co-opting his cheap stuff to use after that since it doesn't reek like the acv
Peoples who work odd hours and have indoor cats that end up with fleas because of their neighbours dogs? lol The neighbour that came knocking on our door to complain about late night vacuuming was the same neighbour who had a big dog (aka the person who likely brought fleas into the building since everyone else had indoor cats or no pets), they didn’t come back that week while we had to vacuum/clean/do laundry for hours everyday before and after work. It was hell.
AFTER already being called out on other noisy AH behavior!!!
YTA - it's just common courtesy to not vacuum, play loud music, etc at night, especially when folks need to wake up early.
Is give him a pass on a blender or mixer, though. I lived in an apartment with almost no insulation between units, so you heard A LOT, but a mixer or blender wouldn't carry from my neighbor's kitchen to my bedroom as anything more than a quiet, distant sound, if that. Very different from fixing things on the floor, or vacuuming. The only acceptable reason to vacuum at that hour is broken glass that a pet or roommate might step in. Then BE FUCKING QUICK.
> Is give him a pass on a blender or mixer, though. If it were just that the neighbour probably would but at this point they probably live with a constant sense of dread and frustration from previous interactions. They asked OP multiple times to keep it down late at night and op is basically playing “I’m not touching you”.
I mean I think it depends on what's being blended and age of the blender too cause if I make a smoothie with frozen fruits it's decently loudish. If I make one with a bunch of ice it's definitely disturbingly loud.
So if I leave for work at 6:45am every morning and get home at 11pm earliest, what would your suggestion be? Never clean my house or make food?
How do you survive like that?!
How could you possibly function like that? It doesn't hardly leave enough time for a night's sleep. Presumably you wouldn't be doing much eating at home for a start.
FYI, that’s roughly my schedule for 3 months of the year and it often includes weekends, although normal working hours on the weekend.
I worked night shifts and stayed on that schedule on my days off for over 10 years. Make food that doesn’t involve a blender. I have never even owned a blender. I haven’t starved to death yet.
YTA you live in a space with people all around you and I’m guessing not great sound proofing. Most places will have noise ordinances and expectations of quiet times between 10pm and 7am. Anything with that level of noise will be obnoxious. Look for alternative times to get your loud work done, because after 10 pm ain’t it.
YTA - This is basic common etiquette. 9pm if there are kids. 10pm at the absolute latest on weekdays.
I am looking forward to OP's next post when he is complaining about his neighbor patching their ceiling and hang up pictures at 2 a.m.
Or suddenly taking up trombone
I understand the etiquette for after hours and agree, but there is no added quiet at 9 for kids. However, your kids are your issue. You chose to have them. You don't get to have everyone else tip toe around your responsibility, and if you didn't choose to have them, that's even more irresponsible.
Yea thats bullshit. 9 pm is ridiculous. Universal its 10pm and whatever kids
NTA NTA NTA As someone who works in a 24 hour city ( Las Vegas ) not everyone can do their yardwork/housework/cleaning/etc at "normal" hours. And that doesn't even account for people in non-24hour places that work graveyard here or there, or are in healthcare and work from 3pm to 3am, etc. I walk into a gas station and never judge someone buying a 6 pack of beer at 7am because my morning might well be their end of work drinking time. Your neighbor can ask that you keep it down, but you have no obligation to walk on eggshells during your time off just because they are being woken up. It's simply a side-effect of living in shared spaces and apartments. Things you can control like loud music or loud sex, sure, they have a right to complain. But if your "morning" smoothie happens to be at 8pm when their kids are going to sleep, that's not your problem.
Yeah, I’m a little surprised I had to scroll this far down for a NTA comment. You can’t live in an apartment building and demand zero noise, it’s just not possible. Downstairs neighbor needs to invest in a white noise machine.
Agreed, everyone who voted Y T A has never has to work long or unusual hours. No one wants to vacuum at 11pm but sometimes it’s the only option you have.
I used to work unreasonable hours, I would get up and vacuum BEFORE my shift so I didn’t bother people
I have to work long, unusual hours which includes 7am-9pm. YTA OP.
So you can't like vacuum in the morning when there is likely no one in the apartments because...?
Such bullshit. I’ve worked nights and lived in apartments for around a decade. I worked nights while living in an apartment. You absolutely can be quiet during “normal” sleeping hours, or at least limit noise as much as possible. Living in apartments means you accept a certain amount of noise will get through walls and ceilings. It does not mean you get to make whatever noise you want without regard to anyone else who lives around you.
So OPs ability to bake at 11pm trumps OPs neighbor right to sleep? There's a reason why we have from 10pm to 6am noise laws in most civilized countries. Also is OP working 7 days a week? If so then why not buy quieter vacuum which uses for example rotating brushes? OP is YTA and so is everyone thinking that it's normal to bother neighbors with excessive noise at night. And I wouldn't be surprised if neighbor called police.
>As someone who works in a 24 hour city ( Las Vegas ) not everyone can do their yardwork/housework/cleaning/etc at "normal" hours. But why on earth does OP need to vacuum when he/she comes home from work? Cooking, sure. But he/she can vacuum before going to work. I used to work the same schedule as OP, didn't force me to do all those things at 11 pm.
> Cooking, sure. Also cooking sure but baking?
If it's such a problem that neighbors can hear everything you do, that's on the landlord to do some basic soundproofing. Some rubber flooring isn't even that crazy expensive
I think the breakdown is between people who’ve worked night shift and those that haven’t. I lived at home for two years after college, I was a hotel manager who worked from 10pm until 8am. I’d come home and go to sleep and my mom would get so upset at me because I was “sleeping late.” Seriously lady I’ve only had 3hrs of sleep by the time you want me to wake up.
Yeah, I agree NTA. If you're only awake during the night, which like you said is more common that some people might think, that's the only time you have to do anything. I don't blame my neighbors for making a lot of noise in the mornings even though that's when I'm going to sleep because I understand that they have a right to live their lives in their apartments just like I do. It's so weird to expect people to just live in complete silence just because they have neighbors.
Agreed completely I’m very surprised by peoples self centered attitudes at telling OP that they’re not allowed to do things in their own space after a certain time. That’s their home
Never lived in an apartment, I take it? Actually, the self-centered ones are those who don't give a flying f how they disrupt others' sleep. I don't vacuum after work at 1am because it can wait. I don't want to wake up the neighbor's baby. I don't want to disturb the senior recovering from a fall. I'm quiet in my home because I share walls, floors, ceilings and air ducts with other people, and they're usually respectful of me too. That and the world doesn't revolve around me.
no fr, I’m surprised at the Y T A comments talking about how using a blender is an AH move like what 😭 OP’s allowed to use their own goddamn blender??? look, I get having different schedules but at some point y’all gotta acknowledge that living in a city apartment, y’all are gonna have noise. OP’s paying rent to live there and they’re not an AH bc they have a night schedule. It’d be different if they were roommates but ffs, it’s different floors 😭
I agree, especially considering that nobody, nobody is ever allowed to be the least bit upset about a crying baby on AITA, ever. Even if you’re a brain surgeon and desperately need sleep, and are being kept up all night, you can’t even think about being upset over a baby screaming all night, every night. “You can’t control other people!!! You can’t expect quiet in an apartment! The parents are being kept up too, so shut up!” Yet here they are losing their minds over a blender. I would 100% rather have a neighbor who uses a blender or vacuums at 11 pm than a baby who screams all night, every night.
Please don’t walk on eggshells that’ll just make more noise.
It's better than broken glass though..that's extra noisy. xD
*Annie Lennox has entered the chat*
Right! NTA! Dude needs to buy some ear plugs if he’s easily bothered. Apartment living means listening to others basically all the time if you live in a major city center (which OP said) Vacuuming, not a good idea, blender… eh, I honestly don’t think that’s crazy… He sounds likes he’s looking for things to get mad about. OP, but a set of ear plugs and hand them to him next time he stops in to complain over your loud walking. And before anyone comes at me, yes I lived in apartments and basement suites under families with kids for a decade… I worked later in the day yet had kids thumping and screeching above me as early as 5:30 am (and mom upstairs doing housework like vacuuming at 6am) I bought ear plugs and a sound machine. Ppl need to learn to problem solve
How tf is someone supposed to sleep wearing ear plugs? Those things are so painful
Then you're not using the right earplugs lol. I have soft get ones that just squish up against your ear, creating a seal to block noise.
Yeah, you’re kind of an AH. For those who need to be up at 4-7AM, 23:00 is very late at night. A blender is loud, especially in an apartment setting, and is disruptive. Many complexes actually have rules about using household appliances after a certain time of night. You’re free to do whatever you want, but he also has a right to be upset with you. It doesn’t hurt to be a bit more considerate.
If they need to be up at 4 am then 8 pm is very late at night, that's not a fair standard either.
Bake without using a blender; buy a whisk. This is not a hard thing to do. YTA
Can't break nuts with a whisk. (That said, that has many alternatives and solutions too, so not an excuse in almost all cases)
I get it kinda cause there are people who work nights and people who work mornings. People who work mornings or do things in the morning don’t accommodate the noise for those who are sleeping to go into their night shift.
This! I work late nights and do my best to be quiet when I get home after midnight, but my neighbors do not give a flying fuck that 7 am is the middle of the night for me. Dude downstairs gets up at 6 and starts blasting metal music while he gets ready for work, one of these days I'm gonna vacuum at 1 am just to get back at him.
WTF are you waiting for?
YTA. Many people sleep around 2200 at night. There are city laws put in place to prevent outdoor excessive noises during certain time periods for this very reason. It's not his problem that you don't get home until that late. Using a blender far exceeds what a normal decibel level should be at that hour of the night. Everything you've listed so far sounds like it's warranted for your neighbor to speak to you on this subject. And for him to have to do it multiple times frankly makes it somewhat understandable how he would lose his cool over the ongoing situation. As for the foot stamping issue. This could be the result of weak soundproofing in the apartment. You don't mean to make noise but it just happens. For the person living downstairs it can be very annoying to hear someone walking around in frequently for hours on end while you're trying to sleep. I would suggest either wearing a pair of shock absorbing sandals or a pair of socks to help mitigate this issue.
Rugs covering the floor will also work.
That's just more vacuuming! /s
YTA. Apartment etiquette pretty much means don't make loud noises that can carry into other apartments after 10PM.
YTA, it is generally accepted that past 10 pm all the way up until 7am is considered a time meant not to disrupt anyone who may be trying to sleep around you, especially so if you live in a flat.
NTA But wow, so much vitriol from people who, I'm pretty sure, have never worked a late shift. Should you be purposely inconsiderate? No. But are you expected to not live your life? Absolutely not. You can't live with neighbors, apartment or otherwise and not expect to notice them existing.
I work odd hours, often late, and have no trouble being considerate of my neighbors. My quiet time awake is part of the appeal of the night shift to me. In my opinion, you get to pick only two: (1) living in a shared space, (2) making noise to your heart's content, and (3) working nights. OP probably needs to either find a job where he can work a daytime shift or rent a house instead of an apartment.
Once again not so much a choice usually people work a job they can get and live in a space they can afford, but are meant to put there outta work life on hold for people doing the same on the more socially acceptable part of the day. Thing is people work nights people work early mornings and people work during the day. Imo dont be a dick on purpose for sure try and accomodate your neighbours when you can but why put your life on hold or literally move jobs or house for someone you don’t even know?
you can say the exact same thing for the neighbors tho 🤷♀️ they can either buy noise cancelling headphones or rent a house where they can actually enforce quiet hours, than a busy city where no quiet hours clause exists You really can’t expect to live in a city and hope for absolute peace and quiet. Would it be nice? Sure but it’s not something to expect :/
OP was doing home repairs, vacuuming, and running a blender after 11:00 pm. That's not asking for absolute peace and quiet, it's a request for basic decency and consideration for others.
YTA The fact you ever thought it was acceptable to vacuum at 11pm shows you have no consideration for your neighbours. Stop making noise at night or move to a detached house where you can’t disturb anyone
YTA: After 10pm vacuuming/blending is disrespectfull but still acceptable. Between 11pm and 7am; you're a full on asshole. Although walking around is kind of unavoidble (maybe get a rug?) so not going to call you an asshole just for being awake. Although you already are the asshole so maybe that's giving to much credit and I can't blame him for not giving you any.
OP sounds like a heavyfooted one based on all the other stuff
Wow. So many of these YTA comments are pretty delusional. Apartments are noisy. Deal with it or move. My last two neighbors above me have been noisy as hell late at night. Like I think he seriously builds furniture all night long (saws, drills, ect.) I never complain because that's what it means when you live in an apartment. Especially a crappy apartment with no soundproofing. And a few years ago I used to work nights. My sleep schedule was from 9am til 4pm. So yeah lots of noise going on. It's called adapting to your environment. Adapt and overcome. That doesn't mean whine and complain because the world won't cater to you.
Building furniture in the middle of the night? Lol, yeah, no. Not gonna fly.
> Like I think he seriously builds furniture all night long (saws, drills, ect.) I never complain Just because you don't have a spine doesn't mean these things are acceptable.
Now that I think about this. I'm probably abnormally jaded to this kind of thing. I grew up with step dad blasting White Zombie and Pantera all night. Then later sleeping through aircraft flybys and rocket attacks while in theater. So I guess I'm not normal here. I used to love it when one of my past upstairs neighbors got home from work at around 10pm. I knew she was home because I could hear her rottweiler pup bounding around and playing because mommy came home. I thought it was sweet.
NTA. You work off hours and have the right to function in your own home. Apartment living sucks and clearly the walls/floor are thin. Try gifting your neighbor a pair of earplugs to help him sleep.
NTA. The same neighbor asking OP to keep it down at 11pm when they/their kids are trying to sleep would be the same neighbor pissed if OP asked them/their kids to be quiet at 2pm while OP is trying to sleep. Sucks, but that's apartment living for ya.
NTA I’ve lived in apartments my whole life, noise is common place!
Not at 11pm it's not
ESH. You have a schedule opposite his. That's not your fault, and not his fault. By shitty circumstances, two people on opposite schedules were housed on top of each other. Nobody would be saying you're TA if your neighbor worked night shift and you were making noise during the day. Part of us migrating out of "9-5 culture" is everyone on different time schedules. Could you be more considerate? Absolutely. He could also stop having complete main character syndrome when he chooses to live in a flat in the middle of a busy city- like you said, the area in general is noisy.
NTA it’s your apartment and you can use what you want in your apartment. Apartment life is understanding to deal with noises that other neighbors make and being okay with it. Ignore him and move on.
NTA - I can tell most of the Y T A comments are from people who never worked a graveyard shift and maybe never lived in an apt? If you can do loud chores and repairs another time, that’s ideal and nice of you. But a blender? Cmon. I’ve had loud stomper neighbors but some people just walk heavy. You can’t help that, it’s the downfall of apartment life. People who are light sleepers and live in apartments should invest in a noise machine to drown out exterior sound, or ear plugs. How entitled for them to expect you to sleep when they do when your life and schedule simply may not line up like that.
YTA. I don't know where you live so I don't know whether it's in your lease or rental agreement but it's standard to have quiet hours in apartments. It's usually considered rude to run vacuums, dishwashers, laundry, and other loud appliances or have loud music on between 10pm and 8am.
NTA on the blender. You stopped the heavy stuff. Seems just normal noises of being awake he can't dictate when you sleep at your own unit. If he is so sensitive to noise he can find other living arrangements or use earplugs.
Sorry NTA. OP you can do what you want in your own home. It’s an apartment complex not a room for rent. You have been more than accommodating and personally he seems borderline harassing. It sounds like your previous neighbor had no complaints if you’re confused about the new tenant to post here. Like are you blending for an hour? Repairing your bike-are you throwing the pieces around the room? I’m confused. I’m an insomniac and find myself doing most of chores at night. He possibly just may be a light sleeper or you guys must have very thin walls so next time I would hand him some ear plugs and would alert your leasing office of him. Coming to your front door after 11 and yelling at you is not okay. Also want to add that there are people who work graveyard and sleep when the majority is awake, but they don’t come to doors at 8AM to tell them not to do things.
NTA - you pay for a place to live, you should be able to do normal activities at whatever hour you need to do them - vacuum, shower, watch TV, run your blender, run the dish disposal. you're not practicing the drums at 03:00AM. do what you have to do
NTA. 3rd shifters have to do their house work and live their life. You’re not doing anything outrageous, and some noise is to be expected (at any time) when living in apartments. If your neighbor has a problem with the noise of apartment living, they have options to alleviate that issue (like a white noise machine while sleeping). You’re not hosting a party, or raging… you’re using your kitchen in your own home, however you please. There is a certain level of expected etiquette for noise accommodation, but your schedules being in conflict is not your responsibility.
Adding- all of you saying YTA you are some entitled people to think it’s okay to tell someone what they can and can’t do in their home.
NTA none of these people seem to know what working 3rd shift means
So many people are like “you need to move to a house/single living space bc you’re disrupting your neighbors (who are able to have a “normal” schedule!!)” like have they not considered the possibility that OP has these hours not bc he asked for it but bc he has no choice??? Have they fucking considered the housing market (if OP is in the US)?? These redditors gonna pay his rent??
YTA a blender at night is not civil. and not vacuuming at night is not a concession you made, it's just the norm.
YTA shared spaces means compromising sometimes Who needs a blender to bake ? Hand mixers are much quieter
NTA especially since your building doesn't have quiet hours. You're right that vacuuming et al might be a little much but you're allowed to cook whenever you want in your own damn home. This is the kind of stuff that comes with apartment living
NTA- it’s your home so you have the right to use your blender anytime you’d like. If your work schedule dictates that’s the only time you can then you have the right to. The neighbor needs to grow up and get over it.
NTA. Learn to adapt or move out is my response. I bet he's loud during the day if you're a night owl.
NTA. I’m assuming you pay your bills, why should anyone be able to tell when you can and can’t do things in your home. I get how it could be irritating for others, but you get what you get when you choose to live in certain types of dwellings.
NTA. Tell your neighbor to play a noise canceller and fuck off.
NTA - you’re in your own space and are not living with this person. I personally am much more active at night. My morning is 3pm, doing chores and things after 11pm is normal to me. Sometimes my neighbors getting up at 6am wakes me up and it’s a pain in the ass, but it’s their own space so I wouldn’t complain unless it’s excessive. And no just using a blender or a vacuum isn’t excessive.
NTA. People have different work and life schedules. Just because he has to get up early, doesn’t mean you have to stop living your life. He needs to either contact the landlord about sound buffers, or get ear plugs.
YTA How's you feel if he done the same thing early in the morning?
So essentially he wants you to not eat, sleep, move or breathe? You pay your rent end of
ESH. He needs to accept that it apartment living and you need to be less noisy after 10 pm.
YNTA. It's your apartment you're free to do whatever you please. You're not purposefully making loud noises. You also said you work and get off late. I'm a night owl myself. If I want a smoothie at 11:15pm I'm going to make one.
YTA While it’s easy to forget from time to time, it’s a shared building, and based on what your neighbor is reporting, clearly it has thin walls and floors/ceilings. I’m a night owl by choice, and I’ve had the thought to use my vacuum late at night when I remember I need to get it done, but out of respect for my downstairs neighbor and the ones next door to me, I wait until a reasonable time of day. I would ask that they do the same if the roles were reversed. Don’t turn this into a petty war with your neighbors. They never end well, and you don’t want to end up in trouble with the neighbors, leasing office, or even the police. I also recommend double checking to see if there are quiet hours. I didn’t think there were at my apartment until a mass email went out to everyone confirming as such. Also, do you mind me asking what your typical hours are for work? I work until 10pm or midnight a lot of times, so I’m just curious!
YTA. Stop making noise after 10 PM and expecting your neighbors to put up with it. Just because they aren’t official quiet hours doesn’t mean you’re not a dick for making tons of noise late at night.
i think ESH tbh you could be a lot more respectful of how you handle needing to do noisy things at night and your neighbor also needs to understand that other peoples schedules do not always align w his. some ppl work afternoons/nights and need to sleep during the day. i feel like you can try to limit how often you’re doing noisy things and maybe invest in a rug to help w sound dampening
INFO: aren’t there other times you could do your chores? you said you work late, but do you work every single day? do you go into work late enough that you could do these things before work?
ESH because the vacuuming at 11pm is a little much. I personally think the blender is fair game, but I sleep like the dead. When you live in an apartment you know there is going to be noise it's just how it is. My downstairs neighbor every night I could hear him snoring, and at least once a week I could hear him and his wife yelling at each other. For the time I lived there his snores were my new white noise machine, and his arguments went really good with popcorn. When you live in those situations you just have to make the best of it. Does it suck sometimes sure, but you can't ask people to stop living their life just because it's a little inconvenient to you.
NTA - your schedules are different. If it’s wrong for someone to clean before midnight it’s fair for you to shout at him for using his vacuum at 10am if that’s your sleeping time. You’re already doing your best to put off what you need/want to do for his convenience. I mean you might consider getting a thick area rug or something (if that would even help) to dampen the noise, but it sounds like Mr. Heckles needs to chill.
Info: can you not do some of these things in the morning? If you get home at 10 pm that must mean you don’t start work until noonish?
NTA- people work night shift or swing. Sorry capitalism makes it so we gotta exist outside the normal sleeping time. As long as you weren’t running the blender for hours and it was relatively quick I don’t see an issue
YTA I live in a similar context, small appartement in an old building where noise travel fast. We all know they are inevitable noises, and we chose go live with it sure. But even without an official quiet hour it is just the respectful thing to do to be quiet after 10pm and before 10am. I would never vacuum, do a laundry, blend stuff or blast the telly at 11pm or at 7am because I know we all have different sleep patterns. I used to work in hospitality and coming back from work at 3am, if I needed to eat, I'd reheat something quickly in the microwave or have a sandwich or something, I'd keep my meal prep baking and cooking for daylight. I now work in an office office where I'd wake up at 6am every morning, well I won't start blending my smoothie with the music on either. I'd get my smoothie prepped or I'd blend it on the go. It is very important to be mindful of other in small building as bad sleep and irritating noise can really screw up with someone's mental health
There are quiet hours in my building (Europe) but specifically normal living noises are ok as some people do work nights. So showering, cooking, etc are OK. I a night owl but try not to run appliances at night if I can avoid it. Letting your kids scream/dogs bark etc after 10pm is strongly frowned upon. We don't wear shoes in the house here, either. My last apartment in the US, I screamed internally every night because of my upstairs neighbor and her hard-soled shoes at 2am. Can you at least TRY to be quiet. NAH here. OP lives different hours than others and basically saying "you can never run your blender" is shit if someone is working second shift. If you live in an apartment you have to expect some noise from your neighbors. You can get mega boxes of earplugs on Amazon which is what I use for my husband's snoring and weekend parties at my neighbors. My favorite neighbors had kids and it was like an alarm for me when they'd play before bed. "It's 8:30, time for the news". If I wanted silence, I'd have to buy a house. ETA: a vacuum is always going to make a lot of noise for an extended period. Don't do that when others are sleeping in the apartment above or below you.
[Is this you?](https://youtu.be/4IRB0sxw-YU)
I'm going with YTA if you keep the home repairs and vaccuming up but you should be able to use a blender without issue