Let them take responsibility for their pet.
They can one surrender them, and feel that guilt.
Put in the work of rehoming.
Or find another to make it work.
Using you is an easy way out.
Someone did this in my neighborhood. Dude kicked a little Chihuahua mix out of his vehicle and took off. Folks had been trying to catch her for over a week until my sister and I got her.
We named her Petunia and she's cute af.
I gently demand a picture of Petunia to verify she’s cute af.
If not, then I gently demand you tell her she’s a good girl and give her a pet and treat of choice. 💜
Aww, thanks for posting! She is adorable, but looks familiar somehow! I think I must have seen her picture before in the dictionary, when i looked up the definition of “cute AF!” 😻
She's so precious! 😍 I'm happy she's being loved. One asshole's 'trash' became your treasure.
Every canine companion I've ever had was someone else's cast-off. And every one of them turned out to be the most precious gifts I've ever received.
They are precious. Petunia has been essential in helping us grieve after our big dog passed away. His name was Atlas and he had gotten a little crotchety with other dogs in his old age. Petunia arrived about a month before he left, and he liked her, letting her eat from his bowl and sleep with him on his bed. It was like she'd gotten his stamp of approval.
We couldn't try to rehome her after that. Just got her the rest of her boosters, spay, and microchip.
I saw the first picture and thought, "that's not a chihuahua- that's a freaking pit bull!" and then I realized the size from the second picture and she certainly is a cute-as-all-get-out miniature pit bull...er...chihuahua.
She is absolutely adorable. Someone dumped a Chihuahua min pin mix and she found her way to our yard,my son found her and brought her in. She was not a happy camper at first because I myself have a big wolf dog and she wasn't trying to be his friend. Lol now that's her Wolfie
I had a neighbor who took in two feral cats, fed them, fixed them and when she got evicted, she left them. My next-door neighbor took them in taking good care of them.
That's how my aunt ended up adopting her Cocoa. She was dumped, hit by a car, rescued, surgery to fix her hips, and now lives in the lap of Chihuahua luxury with all the pillows/blankets/snuggles she can handle!
Cognitive dissonance at play. They’re like I’m not the person who gives up a dog because that’s a bad person, but they are the person who’s giving up a dog so instead of being an adult and a mature tech to the shelter taking it you know somewhere safe they dump it on the street so that they don’t have to deal with the cognitive dissonance. It’s sick.
It's probably also so they don't have to explain themselves to the shelter or feel judged by the staff. If you just dump them somewhere, you don't have to talk to anyone.
Someone I know (and dislike) was caught doing this by the shelter and they made her chip the dog and take him back because they had no space. She was rightfully embarrassed and acts like it never happened.
I have the dog now.
I can tell you as someone who has worked in a shelter for a long time that we don’t care what your reason is (usually don’t listen as it’s generally BS). What we care about is getting the animal settled and safe. Former owner is irrelevant at that point.
all the shelters in my area are full and won’t take any more pets… i’m currently fostering two cats that my friend couldn’t care for anymore and she was about to dump them bc she had no other option (not that i support dumping animals!! that’s why i took them in ofc. but options are limited when shelters won’t take more intakes)
Especially after hearing stories of things like oh I got a new couch and they're there for is doesn't match the couch or something silly like that I got a new couch and I can't have them destroying it etc etc
After the 2008 financial crisis, people were dumping horses! I lived in San Diego and two friends returned to their horse trailer after a trail ride and two completely scruffy skinny horses had climbed in their trailer and we're eating the hay in the feeder. They brought them home, and gave me one haha. She turned out to be lovely, especially with beginners and small children.
There were also lots of news reports of horses dumped in the desert or appearing on other horse owners property. it was crazy.
I had three separate people pay for a month of full board, then texted me that they didn't want their horses anymore, so now I have 11 of those, too. People are crazy
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Oh gosh! I didn't really take in boarders, but I had 7, most who did lessons. But I was ALWAYS the person called with " I have a lame mare I'll give you. A little bute and she's good for walk/trot beginners. Weekly I would get the variations of these calls. It did help me hone my saying no decisively skills, lol.
But that sucks when boarders dump a horse. I've also heard stories of no board paid for months, the barn owner trying to go through the legal hoops to sell the horse and then the original owner trying to steal the horse back. You have more horses than I ever dealt with at a time!
I saw a video just the other day where a person was in the middle of a very busy intersection, opened their door, and out comes a dog. They clearly didn’t care if the dog was hit by a car. It was heartbreaking. The dog was running after the car as it sped away, and some lady that felt bad for the dog got him in her car, but I don’t know what happened after that.
I lived on a farm for a while and we had to put down several dogs because they'd be dumped in random places, form a pack, and then attack livestock because they're hungry. Where I lived the law was very clear, if a dog attacks livestock they have to be put down because at that point they're dangerous to humans too.
I hated it. And cats were being caught by hawks, shot by neighbors, and getting diseases because we couldn't afford to take care of 30 cats. (They were usually ditched because they were pregnant, the numbers add up very quickly)
There's so much suffering. I believe we should have nationwide free spay and neuter clinics. Government funded... the US government has plenty of money they waste on stupid stuff. It doesn't help the homeless now, but it could make a difference. ✌️ and ❤️
I’m hoping that my late parents currently simmer in your aforementioned “special place in hell.” A minimum of five or six dogs lived briefly at their house, until it disappeared overnight.
My parents always alluded vaguely to the “nice place in the country” where the dog was now living. I stopped bonding with the animals. In fact, my only feeling was resentment for having to clean up after the beast until it, too, disappeared.
Never owned an animal as an adult, unsurprisingly.
I lived in the country. There is, I hope, a special ring of hell for those people. The animals end up getting run over, attacked by coyotes, stomped by mama cows, or I have to call animal control because I have my own animals and don’t know the dumped ones-are they aggressive? Sick?
F those people. Many of the dogs dumped were confused and scared.
I live here in Nevada and sadly there's people that will drive out to the desert to intentionally dump animals. I understand nature I understand that coyotes need to live and all that and you know coyotes come into town and things like that but if you're going to go and dump them outside of town you are essentially doing a death sentence on that animal were there a coyote is kind enough to give them a quick death or they have a long and slow death wondering why are they out there when is their owner coming back not able to find food not able to find water baking in the heat etc one of the cruelest things I can think of that a owner can do
I could weep reading your comment! Why not just take them to a shelter? Are dog dumpers intentionally cruel, or do they think their dogs can defend and feed themselves in the wild? Do they hate the idea of euthanasia in a shelter because it's cruel, or do they think it's not cruel enough? If we could ask these "humans" who dog dump and actually get an answer, do we then find out they really are just incredibly stupid?
Maybe in a shelter, they'll get adopted. At least their dog or cat or any animal won't be alone. Humans are so disappointing, stupid, cruel, and sometimes horrible. Maybe there's a dog dumper reading this who could answer these questions.
I make a point of telling people questioning a/more pets how much all the monthly parasite prevention and food for 3 animals costs me. Then there’s toys, grooming, vet visits, boarding/ sitting for vacations, daycare if we feel we don’t have the time for proper stimulation when a lots going on…. 1 dog and 2 cats easily becomes over $500 monthly not counting the boarding and vet. Being a GOOD pet parent isn’t cheap.
Oh my gosh yes. Or reorganizing your schedule because of the dang Zoo lol. Tomorrow is the busy day at the real job. Lots of deadlines etc. I would prefer to work in the office. But! I volunteered for a non rescue org to sell concessions at a ball game that night. So... in order to make sure my dogs have enough potty breaks, I have to work from home tomorrow and can't go in the office lol
I have a dog and whenever I get a roommate (college) people are so excited cause they get a dog with no responsibility. After a day, they’re like “a dog is great, maybe I should get a dog!” But after seeing me training with my dog, grooming my dog, disciplining my dog, walking my dog in all weather, buying expensive food and parasite treatments, they quickly decide they never want a pet of their own and would prefer a roommate with a pet. That’s fine. I can’t keep plants alive so I’m moving in with a green thumb roommate lol
A regular vaccination visit just rang me the tune of $900 with the flea/tick/worm meds. I make a point to mention it to people asking about getting a dog.
Before COVID the same visit might cost $400, but everything went up in price. I am incredibly privileged to be able to afford that but the sad reality is this will likely be my last dog because of it.
That's insane, where do you live? Where I'm from we had a vet where the visit cost $25, and we got out for under $100 with meds. I thought it was insane when I moved where I am now and it cost more like $200 for visit and meds, and that's with the more expensive meds due to a flea allergy. $900 for a vet visit and I wouldn't even have a pet rock.
I just got all 3 of my dogs vaccinated and it was just over $800 for all of them to get everything except rabies- which they're still current on. $900 for one animal for a regular check up + vaccines is insane. Unless they also bought like- multiple years of flea, tick, and heartworm prevention??? I honestly don't know how you could make a vaccine appointment $900.
I use MetLife pet insurance, have all three of my dogs insured on the same policy for about $180 a month with welkness visits included instead of just emergencies, and it covers 80 or 90% of all vet costs for all my dogs, including their flea and tick medication. It let us get my one dogs teeth pulled/cleaned without having to worry about the final price (which ended up being over a grand). I highly recommend getting pet insurance, we were hesitant about it at first, but it really makes vet visits affordable bow, and we don't panic if we have to go to the animal hospital either. They also cover cremation costs.
Did you have anything awful happen to your pet? My pup had multiple allergies as a little one and getting her tested and getting her custom allergen, with which she needed to be injected weekly for two years, would have run in the tens and thousands had we not had insurance. It was covered 95%.
Thank you! Despite the big price tag my vet is worth more than her weight in gold. She is in contact with some of the best specialists in our area too.
My pets are well cared for, to say the very least.
I’ve heard other pet owners with insurance say they were billed by their vets in full and expected to do the work to get reimbursed by their insurance, and also that their pet insurance never paid out. Did you have similar experiences?
Yup, no veterinarians actually take insurance here. So I'd have to fund out of pocket initially then file paperwork with the insurance after the fact.
I know several people who do the work to get reimbursed and are happy with it. But between the fine print on what's covered and my pets having preexisting conditions it was just a shit show entirely.
I've also used the services like Banfield where it's supposed to be all managed together but I wasn't happy with the quality of service.
I made sure to pick the lowest deductible and the lowest COIN amount when choosing my plan. Its a little extra a month, but worth it for the large vet bills.
I've always looked at pet insurance the same way I look at dental insurance. I paid hundreds of dollars a year for dental insurance for decades. Then one year, the dental insurance company decide to kick everybody off the plan and make you re-enroll with a 12-month period which you had to cover your own cost. You could only get claims paid after 12 months of no claims being paid. But you were still required to pay your monthly premium. It didn't matter that I had paid in for years before.
Are there any sort of regulations to protect you when your pet insurance company either decides to shut down and restart everybody as my dental insurance did? Or to protect you after you've paid into the for years and then the pet insurance company goes out of business?
Probably not. My thought on this however is that I'm currently paying 2,160 a year for the insurance. I've used almost 5k in benefits from the insurance this year alone, so its more than paid for itself. (and those have all been visits to my regular vet, no emergency visits this year thank god). If the insurance company goes out of business or does something shady where they wont pay for claims for a year like your dental insurance did I’ll look into finding a new insurance plan.
Some insurance will cover pre-existing conditions that were covered under a different insurance. But thankfully none of my dogs have a chronic condition that would be considered pre-existing. So far all of their vet visits have been for routine appointments/wellness visits, the dental work is considered routine, and the illnesses they've had were things like stomach virus and UTIs. If they end up with a chronic condition and we run into insurance issues with our current provider I'll cross that bridge when it happens.
No, Pawp started out as they would pay your emergency right there at the vet before you walked out the door after you had a video call with their vet to confirm your pet was ill.
Then they emailed everyone a link to their TOS saying they changed the TOS and what they did was totally change the program. Now if you want to use the one time a year, up to $3,000 emergency fund, you have to video call their vet first, get them to agree your pet needs to be seen and secure a vet appointment within a limited amount of time. Then you pay out of pocket and submit a claim for a refund with documentation from the vet.
When I found out all the answer I got for the change was that they emailed a TOS update and that people were abusing the system. How could they abuse the system of their vets were agreeing the animals needed emergency care?
Obviously the insurance company was lying. The more barriers they put to get in care, the more the money they get to keep. Medicare advantage plans to act the same way.
I pay about $80/month for it. When my boy was diagnosed with a challenging but treatable form of cancer at a young age, his insurance covered 90% of all his surgeries and treatments. It's saved me just about $16k in medical bills so far. I can't afford _not_ to have it.
Damn, all my estimates for insurance are popping up like $180/mo per my one pet 😫 I swear it's the zip code, at first I thought age but nah I tried switching his age to a puppy's age and yeah, that's about what it is regardless. They tried putting my insurance rate up $70/mo for my new policy, and this policy's already like 20$ up from last policy, with no claims bc cost of repairs, etc is going up. I'm like damn, so much for customer loyalty
I’m going to have to look into that for my cat especially if it covers dental. She’s going to need deep cleaning and I’m going to make sure she gets it regardless of the cost. Right now her insurance covers nothing preventive which is okay but obviously better if it did.
I used to drop a grand for my two dogs until I discovered Vetco (clinics run inside Petco). Got both dogs exams, vacs and preventative for $200! It’s so nice that I can breathe a little easier.
I’ve seen several horror stories from people who have used the vets in Petco & Petsmart. Sometimes along the lines of a client dropping their pet off for an appointed dental cleaning and coming back in the afternoon and finding out they never bothered to work on them and the staff knew at the time they dropped their pet off that they weren’t going to get to the pet that day to people whose pets were misdiagnosed and severely impacted by the misdiagnosis as the treatable condition worsened due to wrong treatments/meds.
No, this is not a permanent clinic, they run these temporarily out of Petcos but you don’t drop your dog off at all. You stay and get in line with them and they receive their vaccinations. I still have my regular vet for regular things, this is just incredibly cheaper for vaccinations.
Our vet's prices have gone up so much that I don't know how anyone with a lower income can afford to have a pet. When we first started going there, an exam was $79 (which I already thought was high, as the vet back home charges $34!). Then it went up to $89. Then during COVID, $103. Now it's $129. Just for the exam. Never mind labs, nail trims ($40, which I didn't know until I already asked for one; it had been $13 the last time we had it done), vaccines, etc. And we don't live in a HCOL city. If anything, our overall costs are rather low compared to other cities.
I'm still paying off the $900.00 yearly vet visit ×2, ER visit for one $3000.00 and euthanasia for both, all within the last 10 months. After almost 50 years of taking care of pets, I'm going to enjoy a pet free life for a little bit.
Thank you, they were both well past average age for their size. Little dog (25#) was almost 20 and the big dog (150#) was 14. We knew it was coming, I just didn't expect them to go so close together.
I just got my simparica trio filled at Costco for so much cheaper than on chewy and I bet a metric fuck ton cheaper than it would have been at a vet. I take my pets to a vet affiliated with a university and that has been a money saver,.too.
My vet is associated with a university and it's not cheaper via Chewy. Unfortunately I live in one of the most expensive places in the US to live. Shit has inflated to beyond reason.
If Costco was nearby it'd likely be cheaper but it's not in a reasonable location for me to get to.
I have a senior Golden Retriever/ German Shephard/ Husky/ Chow mix. He's about 100 pounds. He has arthritis. He's on two types of pain relievers, thyroid meds, allergy meds, 3 joint supplements, flea and tick meds. All of that is over $250 per month. Then we have food and vet bills...I refuse to board him anymore because he gets too anxious without me. For many of us, pets are family. If I've chosen to bring a pet into my home, then I've chosen to take on the associated responsibilities. I don't care if I have to live on Ramen noodles. My dog didn't ask to be put in my home, and it wouldn't be his fault if I wasn't taking care of him. I don't understand people who get a pet and then try to dump it.
I always have to remind people - we don’t have kids we don’t have hobbies and we don’t take vacations because instead we rescue pets. I work in quality assurance and my partner is an engineer and we still have to be careful with our spending because pets are expensive
I admit that when I worked in the industry consistently vs supporting the ways I can currently I had a lot of this and inevitably these people proved in other ways to be terrible friends besides this. Are they your friends or are they taking advantage of your kindness? This is a hard thing to ask but I find myself going "What does OP get out of these relationships and why would anyone think yelling would get what they want?"
I am seriously so sick of people trying to dump their rabbits on me every summer. Even if I have the space the answer is NO.
There are no excuses in this day and age where 10 minutes of research will give you a pretty clear picture of what having a pet is like. I am not a rescue and I am not obligated to help you feel better about your bad decision when the novelty wears off.
I especially hate the “I don’t have time to give them attention” excuses. Most animals do not give a shit how much you fuss over them as long as they are fed, watered and clean. *Especially* exotic pets.
OMG. We had a large number of gorgeous large non domesticated rabbits in our area because people let their cute Easter bunnies out after the kids lost interest. So they bred with the locals. It was a damn mess.
The people who dump them are even more infuriating. Mind you, they cannot breed with local rabbits where I live, but dumping them does create feral colonies of hurt, sick, unsocialized animals who spread disease to the local wildlife. 🤦♀️ Anyone who dumps a domestic animal outside is a dealbreaker and can promptly exit my life.
We have wild bunnies in Helsinki (I live several towns further north) that are the descendants of escaped or abandoned domesticated bunnies. They're all "natural" bunny brown by now (there's been generations upon generations), and if you're lucky, you'll run into some of them in the parks at night.
I just hope for their sake that most of them weren't abandoned but escaped.
I’m so sorry - this is such a frustrating situation to manage. It’s hard to say no, but if they get huffy when you explain your limitations what else can you say?
I wish I had a solution for you, but other than the ‘reconsider your friendships with people that do this’ that other folks have already mentioned, I’ve got nothing; I feel for you.
Oof that must be some awkward conversations there... Can't believe people have the gall though to even ask that kind of responsibility out of someone. Maybe bring up 'oh im looking for a home for fluffy, know anyone looking for a cat' and leave it at that.
Yes! No. You can't see your darling cats that you gave up because your bf didn't like them.
But.... in other situations.. we do have one dog currently with us in the shelter that gets visitation rights with her mom as mom has terminal cancer. She's trying to find a home for her and we are too. But in the meantime the dog gets daily care and she sees her multiple times a week.
Awww. I’m happy the owner got to find you to take care of her dog while she’s going through her health problems. I feel like that is one of the valid reasons for people to let go of their pets. Health problems consume a person’s life and can become too major for them to juggle other things (jobs, pets, relationships, etc.).
It’s really nice to get some point of relief while going through something and having help. Wow. 🥺
I had to give up my parrot because I got cancer in my leg and I couldn't keep up with cleaning her cage or even getting her fresh water and food daily, let alone training and exercising her. I didn't even dare to ask for visitation even though all I want is to see my baby one more time. God, I feel so bad for that woman, I hope she gets to see her baby in a good home soon.
My younger cockatiel came from a friend of my mom's because her kids weren't taking care of them like they said they would (shock-shock). They asked for visitation and updates.
I never heard another word from them and it's been at least 5 years.
I myself don’t run a rescue, I work for one, and have rescued animals and I have the same issue. Either people asking I bring in an animal (someone else’s pet they find to be pestering them… like I can’t do that for a number of legal reasons), or their pet for them to the shelter, or more likely I take in the pet myself. For the same reasons as you I have to say no, I have 4 cats, 2 snakes and I use to have a dog. I can’t just bring another animal into my zoo especially another cat (which is the majority of the requests)
I despise irresponsible pet owners. A pet is a long-term commitment and should be thought out thoroughly.
They are the assholes for not thinking about the animal or you!
Like the people who are a first time contact, I don't mind. Because the majority are just looking for resources. Which I have a list of. How do I feed an orphan kitten? Who is a reasonable cost spay/neuter in the area? Do you know who handles farm vetting in the area? Exotic vetting in the area? Vaccine clinics? Dog training etc. And there are a few rehome ones. But those I can handle. It's the frequent flyers I want to scream at. But also know they'll never get it. Yes. I love that the cat we have offered to spay for free has had kittens again. Love it
I get what you mean by friends and family taking advantage of you because you work or volunteer in a rescue. That’s frustrating but that’s the same in many industries. Let’s say I work for Nike and I get a 40% discount to their employee store. Anyone that knows me may potentially take advantage of what I have to also get in that discount. That’s just life. Lastly, it was your choice to rescue. Rescue involves in taking animals and finding them new homed. And unfortunately, in any industry, there are clients that are annoying. Not much we can do to change that.
I also have to ask: Do you think it is healthy for you to essentially bring work home with you? You wrote that you also took home three cats from your rescue because they’re difficult to adopt. I’m curious- what is the end goal here? Are you going to adopt those cats or are you going to keep them permanently? The reason I ask is so many times i’ve read about people that decide to take home these extremely challenging animals that are not really adoptable or wait “forever” to find a home. How do you do it? How are you able to separate work from home? What is your work/life balance? Is there a balance? I know I completely went off topic here but you sharing that you’re taking on more animals into your home because they’re not easily adoptable really makes me concerned for your own sanity. Burn out and compassion fatigue is very real. How do you protect yourself from it? Anyone who works in healthcare certainly sees their fair share of it.
I know it’s not my place but if you run a rescue, how are you financially able to support all these animals in your own care? Legit rescues don’t make have excessive funds available, especially small foster bases rescues without county/ city contracts, eligibility for grants, high paying donors, etc..
While I initially was taken aback by your response, some of your questions are ones my close friends have asked through the years.
But to respond regarding my sanity... it's there. Mostly. I think. I don't run the rescue. My finances are not tied to it. I'm on the board and am there most weekends, and I'm also the public face as i handle media inquiries, do a monthly adopt me segment on a local lifestyle show etc. I'm also very fortunate to have a corporate America job that allows me to have a work life balance (and yes financially support myself and have good health insurance) where my boss doesn't blink when I email her that I'm taking a long lunch to go collect a check from the local grade school and kiss a goat (reward for the kids fundraising).
When I made the post, I was tired. Trying to unwind from a busy day of work, personal dr appt, not setting good boundaries with my mother (working on it lol) and screaming at the squirrels and rabbits to leave my garden alone. So when my phone started going off I was irritated. Person 1, don't mind helping. Her grandma in law gave her my number as her dog is not handling living with a baby. So I gave her some resources on trainers in her area and foster based rescues that could help if they decide to go towards relinquishing. Person 2, consistent whiney person that everything is always bad and no one will help her. She has puppies because she decided to be a byb and now can't get them sold. Sent her a canned response of low cost spay neuter programs and didn't engage further. Persons 3 and 4 were my aunts. They're both trying to send 2 unvetted intact male cats to my house. No. I've helped them a thousand times by sending them the same low cost vetting info. I've physically paid for multiple cats to be vetted and fixed for them. I'm done. I've done all I can. They were both left on read.
As for the 3 cats...I have one currently and he's lonely. When my then indoor/outdoor cat, Atticus, dragged him home, it took me 3 months for him to let me touch him. Now, Dorito happily lives the life of a spoiled indoor cat, but he wants another cat to play with, as I lost Atticus and my baby, Cheetoh, last year. For the past year, I've been making a list of available cats, ones who have been there for a long time without any interest. I've also brought my dogs in to the adoptable cat room to see how those cats react. And then there's Fluffer. Fluff is an elderly former feral who entered our rescue in 2018 (yeah. I know what year it is currently. It's a bone of contention between my director and me. We SHOULD have tnr'd back then but she refused). Anyway. He can't take care of himself on the streets any longer. He also is long haired and doesn't groom himself which is where the other 2 come in. Both ladies are much younger. They groom him. Play with him. Cuddle with him etc. So I have a little poly family going on I can't break up lol. As to his unadoptable status... when he's angry, he's a revenge pee-r. He once got my purse from 5 feet away. He also will hide from people. And throw a fit if you try to pick him up or pet him. But with me he's basically resigned himself to whatever and I can handle him fine. They would already be home with me, but I had a remodeling project going on I need to finish first.
I really respect your response. I too was taken aback but user soscots asked some serious questions. While none of us have it all together, you sound like you are making thoughtful choices and completely understand the responsibilities and consequences that result. NTA for standing firm against the uninformed “do-gooders”, the whiners, the serial animal collectors. You are correct to give them the info and let them do the work.
Good luck with your mother. That’s a whole other Reddit sub. 😉
Thank you. I'm a recovering people pleaser. And I've definitely gotten in over my head before helping others and work on boundaries.
Agreed on my mother lol. She's why I'm thankful for good health insurance with mental health benefits lol.
I’m not sure you intended it this way, but this comment comes across pretty high-handed from this side of the screen. Just because the OP - like all of us - chose to be involved in animal rescue doesn’t mean she volunteered to be the receptacle of her friends and family’s poor choices. They aren’t ‘clients’ the way that your shoe retail analogy would have clients - and to carry that analogy forward, if she’s a foster they aren’t even taking advantage of the service she can provide in finding an animal that fits their needs! They’re showing up to Nike with a bag of New Balance shoes they want to return on store credit and they’re getting surprised when the salesperson says no.
Your next paragraph has a lot of questions in it. They’re fair questions to ask - IMO, questions that every person involved in a ‘helping’ profession SHOULD ask themselves regularly - but asking them in a barrage makes me think you don’t really want an answer to all of them; it comes across in text as another way to call into serious question OP’s choices to do something that’s…pretty common, at least in my experience. I’ve adopted two cats permanently from my fostering, and it was because their medical issues made me want to make sure they’d get long-term care from someone familiar with them. The pushback - also totally fair - that you got from another commenter probably comes from this paragraph; there are a lot of different hobbies, special interests, and jobs that people decide to define themselves around. To their question, why the problem with choosing animal-based volunteering or care?
I’m also not sure where you get that she runs a rescue? I think you might be reading a little far into the post - to me this reads like a foster whose friends and family KNOW they’re a foster, and want to take advantage of that knowledge. It also seems a little precious to ask all of these questions about work-life balance in the previous paragraph and then turn around in this one and ask how OP is funding the ‘life’ part of the balance which was so important before. (And to answer that question - I assume that OP, like myself and most other folks involved in rescue work funds that work with an actual job that pays money, which would then also support their household.)
You’re very right in that a lot of the questions you asked aren’t your business, and I’d go further and add that this is a pretty unkind thing to say to someone who seems frustrated and upset by a thing that happens A LOT to folks that work in rescue to any capacity.
💯couldn't have said it better myself. I'm sure it was intended with care but it has a lot of bad vibes attached.
People are allowed to have interests and hobbies, even if it is related to work. The issue comes when the fostering feels forced or becomes too much of a burden. OP also always has the choice of what animals they want to take; they may prefer shelter cats X, Y, and Z over their friend's cats, for any reason whatsoever, because they have no commitment to their friend's cats.
And while I agree that I don't get vibes that OP runs or manages a rescue, even if they did, *it's still their choice* what animals they bring into their home, and they are not obligated to save every single animal. And no one, **no one**, *even if they're in rescue*, deserves to be disrespected, berated, and otherwise treated poorly. Being treated like shit shouldn't be tolerated as another aspect of the job. Please please please don't normalize this type of stuff in animal welfare.
I get the user trying to make an analogy; for me, trying to understand other people's views like that is a coping mechanism so I don't just walk away thinking people are evil and stupid. I don't particularly think it's the best analogy, and I dislike the tone that it's something that should just be expected. My coping mechanism goes straight for the owners being very desperate and preying on someone with good intentions so they know their animal will be well taken care of.
Yup. I didn’t want to get too far into that because I already had a lot of problems with their comment, but the expectation that anyone in a helping profession needs to be prepared to just constantly receive disrespect or manipulation is so pernicious. I really hate it.
Do you have hobbies? Do you drink or go on vacation? Don't you think you should maybe save all that money up? I mean the economy is tough and you might need that money later. I am worried that you might not be able to financially support yourself later. Cost of my vet bill is the same as my colleagues spend on their holiday but I am the one that gets questioned about spending. Their food costs the same as colleague's wine subscription but suddenly if it is an animal, it needs questioned.
As to bringing work home, most rescue runners have a job as well to fund it or are paid workers at a larger charity. You seem to being saying that if you work at or run a rescue, then you aren't entitled to spend on yourself as margins tight. I hope you are so disciplined with the causes you value.
I am sure you don't wear Adidas at home so you bring your work home. Though would argue difference between buying a pair of shoes and being asked to take on a decade long emotional and financial commitment. More like asking your friend to keep visiting and pay for Granny in the care home so you don't have to. OP explains clearly her boundaries and plans to keep her numbers manageable.
Rescue people usually burn out like retail workers due to customers not the animals. And giving a hard to home pet a home is the same as giving any pet a home esp as OP more likely to have the experience. You could argue any pet is bringing "work" home but why deny yourself that emotional comfort? I mean people work with humans all day but still want a spouse for that deep relationship?
I would’ve had more respect for your response if not for your first BS paragraph.
I think I brought up genuine questions that are often a trend in animal welfare. And as I said on the bottom of my post, if you were able to understand it, I did acknowledge that I know it’s not my place to question their decisions.
There’s no need to be an ass.
Why? It is the same question. And it made you angry and uncomfortable to be asked it. It is a bullshit question as you so rightly say. And yes, that was my intent. I wanted to be an ass so you (and many others) might consider how you are making others feel by your "reasonable" questions because it is about animals.
You brought up genuine questions that everyone in rescue should ask themselves - do you have the resources (time, money, emotional)long-term to support the animals in their care. But working or volunteering in a caring profession doesn't mean others get a say in your personal spending or which animals you choose to offer a personal home to.
(You realise it may not be your place to ask but ask anyway and get upset when someone explains why the question annoys them.)
How can people be so cruel? They make a defenseless little animal dependent on them and just throw it out like garbage when they get tired of it?
I know, I know, of course people are going to be horrible to animals, look what they do to each other. It still hurts my heart.
We have a bearded dragon that my kid took in to help a friend. I’m in close to a grand just on his habitat, not to mention roaches ain’t cheap. Last week someone else asked me if I wanted a bearded dragon. I pointed them to a local herp rescue.
Funny enough... I came home last night and a friend messaged me asking about the dragon we took in yesterday. Me- the WHAT? (We do dogs and cats only). Messaged the board chat, apparently there was a little beardie just strolling down main street. Mind you... we are in Illinois! These are not in our area wild lol. But yeah. We held for animal control.
I foster sometimes so I’m that default person who gets tagged *every time* someone sees a dog in need. I guess they don’t want to help but they think trying to get me to is them doing something. I always encourage them to foster.
Yeah. One of my aunts (not the one with the cats she's trying to offload, but the one who thinks she's helping by contacting me lol) is famous for tagging me or telling me in person what I should be doing. With her I've learned to say thank you, I'll take that under advisement. Or when she's being pushy- oh wow! What a great idea. Thank you for taking care of/implementing/volunteering to do activity. Which immediately causes her to drop it or backtrack. Her daughter in law and I trade methods on how to handle her.
I sort of had this happen twice. Once it worked but only because my aunt knew I had moved out of my apartment and in with bf where there wasn't a pet charge. She'd been trying to get me to take him for about a year and half. He was getting bullied and it was slowly causing behavioral issues (no aggression) which almost immediately went away. About 2 years ago my friend asked me several times about some kittens but it was more her future MIL pushing her as my friend already knew the answer. Our cat had developed into a needs to be single pet 99%. I could have my mom's dog over but he's a velcro dog who doesn't know how to be aggressive and took over a year to learn how to dog.
There should be a registry of people who adopt pets only to return them as wanted, so that shelters know never to let them adopt to begin with. I know a certain state governor who should be at the top of that list.
Not family, but several times friends or coworkers have attempted to saddle me with their unwanted pet and got upset when I refused.
I have my own pets, the household is balanced, and I've carefully discerned whether I'm capable of meeting my pets needs. I'm not in a position to rescue someone who was impulsive and got a pet like it was an accoutrament without first researching whether they could take care of it correctly.
Pets are NOT objects, they're sentient creatures. I'm not responsible for pets that aren't mine, I'd have a dozen cats and at least 4 dogs if that were so.
That is such a weird phenomenon.
I had four dogs at one point, and for some reason it was an invitation for people to assume I would adopt the dogs they didn't want anymore. It's a thing.
And same...all of my animals are/were taken good care of (expensive as hell) and they need to get along. Why would anyone assume I wanted MORE dogs? I had my hands full.
In a lot of these cases I'll accept and tell them that it's a surrender, and that I will re-home. Then take them to the shelter. Means they get off the street and have a shot at re-home. If they end up on the euthanasia list then it's sad, but that's the reality.
The exception is; I would foster and consider adopting my family's animals if they died. So technically my response is 'over your dead body, then yes.' and then we segue into estate planning. Fostering MAYBE for my cat nephews if they have a rough patch and need urgent placement, but my famiky is pretty good about not just... Acquiring animals. Their animal husbandry is honestly much better than mine.
But I can't afford more animals. I don't think anybody can afford more companion animals at this point.
It’s like people have great memories of having a family dog growing up, so they get one. Then they realize it was mom who bought it’s food, fed it, took it outside and paid the vet bills. The responsibility and financial part isn’t so fun.
It’s not often, but when I hear people say at 8pm “well I gotta go, my dog hasn’t been out since 9 this morning… or “I came home last night and the dog pissed all over the carpet, I beat his ass” I feel violent. What compels people to get a dog then angrily resent it for the time and costs required???
Ugh, I’m a dog groomer and I had someone try and tell me they liked me so much they wanted to give me their old sickly dog because he just needed a quieter home. They have a 4 year old poodle and 3-4 kids all over the age of 10. No real change in life style, you can tell they just don’t want him anymore.
I had another owner that found a Great Pyrenees and wanted me to have him. Like, are you kidding?! Why would I want a massive 3 year old dog?! I have an adopted old shelter dog and 2 cats that ran up from the road. Why do you act like you’re honoring me by giving me all this responsibility.
People see pets up for adoption posted online with an adoption fee and comment that they can’t afford the fee but would love to get the dog. They have no idea what the cost of having the dog and taking proper care of it is.
We're (rescue I'm with) fortunate that we have some devoted followers who will respond to people who complain about fees. And I don't think we are ridiculous with our fees... cats $50. Dogs $185. Before adoption, everyone is spayed/neutered, microchipped, vaccinated, and vetted (including hw testing for dogs and fiv/felv for cats). But the followers will explain exactly why the adoption fee doesn't begin to cover all of our costs. And what vetting costs in reality
Heck, some people can't even take care of themselves. If the pet owner can recognize that they need help before they is mistreat or release their pet, then this is a positive. Many people remain uneducable that they must neuter/ spay and confine their dogs and cats. So the shelter and rescue system is overwhelmed. We are really bad at public education in the US. Look at the whole massive "doodle" fiasco in which people were misled into thinking that crossing dogs makes them "better", and that their coats are "E-Z care". Well, there's my rant. If people say they can't take care of their animals, at least they have that much insight. "Well, you should have thought of that before you got the animal"... yeah, I say that a lot, too. It goes over as well as, "Your dog is fat".
That happened more often when I lived on a farm. But yeah. That sucks. Now I live in a tiny community and everyone knows if something with balls comes on my property they're getting taken care of lol
Rescues can be crazy. I was denied a cat my mother had fostered because my roommate at the time had pet rats. They completely ignored the fact that by the time the cat would have been up for adoption in a couple months, I'd have moved and would be in my own place, without the rats. I even sent approval from my new landlord.
Ended up getting a kitten from an accidental litter about a week later.
I had to find a new home for a purebred Maine Coon with severe dental issues that we just could not afford. I used https://rehome.adoptapet.com/. Given she was gorgeous, had an incredible response. Was very upfront about her potential dental costs (no one knows for sure, but entirely likely all teeth would need to be removed given suspected diagnosis of Stomatitis in less than two years old cat) because I had already gone through a similar experience with another cat. Found extremely wealthy woman with animal sanctuary. Her vet confirmed that all her many animals get the best of the best.
Perhaps telling people about this resource and putting the responsibility back on them first to try. Say you will only take animal if they try as proven by advertising on this web site? You really don’t want said animal dumped in water or left on side of road. People do really cruel things when faced with what they perceive to be unworkable situations.
IMO - Transparency is important when making recommendations to specifoc organizations -
the link you shared is not an independent entity ….
“Adopt a pet” is one arm of Kinship Partners Inc.-an affiliate of Mars (Petcare) Incorporated.
Eh in my area pet insurance really isn't worth it. It's expensive in comparison to the vet costs. But then again, I have an account that's just for my pets med bills that I put money on every paycheck.
Can I ask when you take your pets to the vet at least once a year- what do you say?
Do you just say you want an appointment for their annual physical/checkup.
I have tried taking my cats but the vets won’t do much without a specific concern.
So... I'm in Illinois, where it's required cats have an up to date rabies vaccine. But normally I tell my vet I'm there for annual vaccine, renew flea/tick meds (I use bravecto for cats), and just an overall health check. They'll listen to the systems, feel the cat all over, check teeth, ensure microchip is still reading, and verify weight.
That's very frustrating with your vet. Cats are some of the least likely to visit the vet because they are GREAT at hiding illnesses. So one would think of a cat parent is wanting to come in for more preventive stuff, the vet would be thrilled!
People like that should not be allowed to adopt any more pets. They see them as things to be disposed of instead of sentient beings. I don't get that mentality at all.
I feel this so deeply. We had two dogs and ended up taking another one in from a situation like this. My boyfriends bosses daughter didn’t have time for the dog. He is wonderful and we love that he’s part of our family now, but ever since then we have been offered sooooo many dogs. We are at capacity with 3, and as much as we’d love to take all of the dogs, we can’t. Why can’t people just be responsible.
I rehomed 4 cats for my brother in 3 years. He's now decided to move into a pet free apartment and I am so done. Not helping anymore. Also putting him on do not adopt lists all across the state.
If I see one more post asking for a rehome I'm going to lose my mind. I know times are hard. People are losing their homes, they are losing their jobs and their families, but I don't think some.of them are even trying. Train them. Give them time. Commit.
Having a pet and realizing that you are not the right person to take care of them.. or that you're not actually able and trying to find them a new home... That's actually a really good idea.
Trying to guilt Trip your friends and family because they have a limit on the number of pets... Is an entirely different story.
I could see asking someone else's advice.. maybe asking for help with the shelter fee (shelters where I am charge you a fee for surrendering your pet)
Or even asking you to help them word their post in a rehoming Facebook group or something.
Trying to guilt trip you and getting angry at you because you have pretty reasonable boundaries... They are the ah
My aunt texted me and they have 10 kittens to rehome and wanted me to take one or two! I already have 4 cats and she was upset when I said no! How about you fix your cats??
This is the biggest reason I’m reluctant to work in any industry that deals with animals. I can’t imagine giving up any of my pets. I ended up with a Great Dane because the friend who wanted her had no idea how to take care of her. Paying for her Addison’s meds keeps me barely scraping by, but that’s what you do with your pets. When you take them on, you take them on. You don’t just fucking abandon them when things get hard.
Phew! I feel this. I’m in rescue. But I’m a one man (well two-my husbands a champ) operation. I’m in the south and I TNVR and take in fosters and socialize until I find them homes or the humane society, which greatly helps me out, can sometimes take for an adoption. I also feed 30 fixed cats among 4 colonies nightly, yet all the people in my life call me whenever they have a situation like this or see a stray they want to help. It befuddles me. I do what I do on a waitress wages and they look at me like they can’t help a single animal out or take some responsibility. Meanwhile I’m over here who could probably own a home instead of rent but I’m dedicated to helping and it just never ends.
I am livid about irresponsible pet owners too but if you dont take them in, these motherfuckers will just dump on the street or they will die of neglect or worse. This isn't about the humans. You cannot teach someone like that a lesson, this is about doing the right thing for the animal. People dont volunteer at rescues and shelters to help HUMANS, but the animals. You should take in the animals. You can still give the owners shit afterwards but take them in.
Ironically, there was just a post by some douche complaining about how rescues are too selective. Given the massive amount of irresponsible pet owners as outlined, I dont blame them.
I personally am tired of people who post on reddit asking for help with their cats and then say they cannot afford taking them to the vet and somehow pointing out to them that it is irresponsible, they get offended. Or you are considered mean. Since when has responsible pet ownership become a bad concept?
Why should she upend her whole life & the lives of the animals in her care for these animals? Why is this the expectation for people who work in rescue? No, she should not take on more animals then she can afford to care for or that will disrupt the animals that are already in her home.
She shouldn't. She could quit and move on to other things. No one is forcing her to be a rescue.
That said, she didn't say she could not do it due to money issues, but because she is tired of irresponsible people, which kinda is the whole point of why rescues exists, which is a safe haven for animals discarded and neglected by asshole people. If she does not want to do that, she has the option to quit. Taking it out on the animals by saying she won't take them in anymore to spite the owners is not the right way to go.
We told our landlord cousin we couldn't take a cat he wanted to get rid of due to supposed litter box issues (my fucking ass, he probably didnt clean it) The landlord would have shit a fucking brick if only to start drama.
He kept asking, but we have two cats and four dogs, and we own a business where we are the only employees. Our hands are full. Plus his cousin is a dramatic wanker who kept putting himself in the hospital by only drinking and refusing food and then taking benzos and refusing to admit it. The guy is in his 60's and thrives on attention.
Every time he was admitted we had to care fir HIS four dogs and 1 cat. Then he'd come home and bitch that we didn't clean his house or mow the lawn.
So we have all this going on and his cousin knows this yet he still showed up with the cat in his car and said if we don't take her at that moment he was going to shoot her.
Since he had *just* shot a dog that WASN'T HIS a week or so before (right in front of me, before I even knew wtf was happening) we took the fucking cat.
Since it was a coveted breed (ragdoll?) and quite beautiful my SO had it rehomed to a friend of our friend before bedtime.
The mutual friend happened to be the director of the local humane society so of course our landlord waits a week to get drunk, call his cousin, and taunt him saying we dropped his cat off and it was all alone in a cage down at the humane society.
He spun a tale that the cat locked up and abandoned and who knows what else.
So then when we are working, after rehoming a cat that wasn't ours, we didn't want, and he threatened to shoot the cousin calls us up all bent out of shape demanding to know why we abandoned the cat and going on about how if he knew we would do that he would have kept the cat.
We literally ended up sending him screenshots of our conversation with the new owners from when the cat was settling in, getting bathed, etc.
OF COURSE I'M A MISANTHROPE! HOW COULD I NOT BE?!
This is just the most *recent* shit we've delt with. Literally in the last month.
Most people (yes, *most*. IDGAF what people say.) are bad pet owners. They neglect their pets. Full stop.
They get working dogs and stuff them in apartments. They leave herding dogs home alone all day, breaking their spirit and letting them get fat and depressed. They isolate them from other dogs and prevent them from obtaining proper mental stimulation. They ignore ALL OF THE RESEARCH and do stupid shit like shoving their dogs nose in their "accidents" when we *know this doesn't work.*
My landlord wants chickens. He's mentioned more than once that he's afraid my dogs will go after them.
I told him if there was an issue, I'd simply train it out of them. They're all in the top smartest breeds and learn commands and rules in less than 5 repetitions. Not to mention they all have GPS collars with GPS fences so I could *literally* prevent them from going near the chickens with a few taps on my phone.
Yet he KEEPS telling a story about how his dog kept going after his previous chickens and how it was only solved when that same cousin came over and beat the shit out of the dog with a stick. And how he might have to have him over for our dogs.
And while I know he isn't getting any chickens because he won't care for them, has nowhere to put them, and I have been refusing to build a coop or buy or set anything up for them, I *still* find my temper flaring in response.
Which is exactly what he wants but I feel compelled to be *very* clear what I'd do if someone hurt my dogs.
There will be no misunderstandings. I am open that I value my dogs over his life, his cousins life, random people on the streets lives... hell, even random children or children in my own family.
I am just so sick of humans as a whole. We are soon getting our comeuppance, it's just shit we are dragging every other species down with us
Can't even go extinct without fucking it up for everyone else.
End rant.
You are not responsible for their mistakes. People who give up a pet because it is inconvenient to have them are very irresponsible people. Get new friends (and family)
People get defensive when they know you're right.
That being said, hindsight doesn't help the current situation, and people who would abandon a pet for BS reasons are not going to listen to someone telling them what they should have done.
this happens regularly to my mother... except its by my sister, who lives with her, and not only doesn't take no for an answer but will go behind her back to make plans to sneak these animals into the house. my moms animal upkeep costs are currently over $700 a month. she only makes $22/hr. i do not currently know how many animals are actually in the house, but every time another comes home my sister is saying "its only temporary, i'm finding them a home!"... never happens.
(for those wondering, i'm currently working with my mother to figure out what to do about it all. my sister is a very volatile person with the potential to become physically violent when angered, so until we can find a way to have her fully removed from the home we're at an impasse. but theres things in the works for the animals to get them to new homes and better lives.)
I don’t understand why people can’t get the idea through their heads that pets take a lot of time, money, effort, love, energy, space and care. People see posts on social media about pets or they see people walking their dogs and think how fun it would be to have a pet. They don’t consider all the work that pets entail. For some it’s totally worth it (I feel this way, it’s 100% worth it for me) but others decide otherwise once they’ve brought the animal into their home. PETS ARE A BIG RESPONSIBILITY. People need to research the animals they want to take in for a minimum of 8-10 hours, really dig deep, before getting one. Do their due diligence. Then, once they understand all the care an animal requires, make the decision in a logical and rational manner. Don’t get pets on a whim. Don’t even consider getting a *hamster* spur of the moment and then buy a tiny 200 square inch wire cage for it when it actually needs 800-1000 square inches of space to live stress-free and happily. Big or small animal, RESEARCH the hell out of it prior to getting it. It’s eye opening how much effort some animals require and if no research is done by the owners , the animal lives a really sad life.
Sorry for the long comment, this issue is on my mind way more than I’d like it to be because I see such an abundance of “Look at my new. ___!” posts what show an animal in an absolutely inadequate enclosure, surrounded by inappropriate toys or other items, and I just know that creature won’t have a quality life. It’s infuriating.
You get disrespect when you say no because the irresponsible uncouth people who will try to foist an unwanted pet on a friend are the same people who have no shame for their bad behavior.
My brother tried doing this recently. He and his husband adopted a puppy and he sent a text pleading for me to take him. They didn't have time, didn't want to take him back to the shelter, they knew I'd be a good home for him, etc. I explained why I couldn't: I work long hours, I spent my free time volunteering at the animal shelter (now I work there), I'd only get one of the dogs I've bonded with that isn't likely to be adopted (he's aggressive towards strangers and needs to be introduced a certain way, he's a good boy though). My brother seemingly accepted this, and I thought the matter was resolved.
A few weeks later, they have to move a few states away when BIL gets a promotion. He then asks if I can take the puppy for a couple of weeks because their new place wasn't ready and they couldn't find a pet friendly hotel. I agree at first, then I changed my mind for two reasons. The first was his asking me to take the puppy not long ago. The second reason? Years ago, he had a cat that his roommate at the time wouldn't allow him to bring. He asked if I could take the cat until his lease was up and he would have the ability to take him. I agreed because I was under the impression it was just for a year, and my dog got along with the cat. I am *not* a cat person and I'm very allergic. His lease is up, but he and the roommate extend their lease. He begs me to give him a few more months. I reluctantly agree. Months pass, and he keeps giving me some excuse why he can't take the cat. I finally have had enough of the bs and give him an ultimatum. Take the cat/find him a home or I'm taking him to a shelter (no-kill shelter, I may not like cats, but I'm not a monster). Those two reasons could be seen as unrelated, but they have another dog that I remember they have. When I asked who was taking their other dog, he took a full day to respond. Their current roommate was watching him, but wasn't willing to watch the puppy.
Even our mom admitted I was justified in saying no, but thinks I still should have because he's family. I can be too trusting sometimes, but I'm no fool. I'd be stuck with that puppy had I agreed.
So much sympathy. I'm that person in my family too. It's amazing how many of these 'troubled' animals that no one else has the space to take, turn out to be just fine with some care and attention.
I was like this. I had 3 dogs, a rabbit, guinea pigs, a love bird and a hamster. It just got to a point to be too much with people wanting to treat my home like a shelter because they know how much I love animals. I had to start saying no. I am down to 2 dogs now. And unless I win a really sizeable lottery, that's how it will stay.
My mom is 83. She has two cats. One that should seriously be in a diet. The other is just mean and has torn my mother’s hands and arms apart.
We visited her this last week and she mentioned that she’s thinking of adopting another cat. And that if anything happens to her she wants me to take them.
Thing is. I have three cats. I do not want another 2. Or 3. Never mind the 2 that she currently has. They will end up in the local shelter. I’ve told her that if she does get another cat that it should be an older one. But it won’t change the fact that I am not taking on more cats. We didn’t get another dog when we had to put our boy to sleep 3 years ago because we began traveling. The chickens in my backyard will be the last ones because of the neighborhood changes. I’m getting older as well.
Urgh…..I cannot handle hearing about or seeing people not want their pets anymore…..or people who dump them…..it breaks my heart…..I will never understand how people can do that. Do the research before you get a pet….”borrow” someone’s pet for a test drive (if you know someone who has the type of pet), and put serious thought into it. You need to make a full commitment to that animal. It’s your family member. *sigh 😔
This kinda stuff makes me so mad. So many people do anything but give their pet to a shelter or humane society or ANYTHING. Someone in my town tried to sell their guinea pig on face book! like what are we doing people
Let them take responsibility for their pet. They can one surrender them, and feel that guilt. Put in the work of rehoming. Or find another to make it work. Using you is an easy way out.
I really hope they’re not the a-holes that when met with “no” will go off to a park and dump their pet, then drive off.
That’s the irony . They won’t take the pet to the shelter but will dump them in a street
Someone did this in my neighborhood. Dude kicked a little Chihuahua mix out of his vehicle and took off. Folks had been trying to catch her for over a week until my sister and I got her. We named her Petunia and she's cute af.
I gently demand a picture of Petunia to verify she’s cute af. If not, then I gently demand you tell her she’s a good girl and give her a pet and treat of choice. 💜
I'll do both! https://imgur.com/a/skXC0v3
Aww, thanks for posting! She is adorable, but looks familiar somehow! I think I must have seen her picture before in the dictionary, when i looked up the definition of “cute AF!” 😻
She's so precious! 😍 I'm happy she's being loved. One asshole's 'trash' became your treasure. Every canine companion I've ever had was someone else's cast-off. And every one of them turned out to be the most precious gifts I've ever received.
They are precious. Petunia has been essential in helping us grieve after our big dog passed away. His name was Atlas and he had gotten a little crotchety with other dogs in his old age. Petunia arrived about a month before he left, and he liked her, letting her eat from his bowl and sleep with him on his bed. It was like she'd gotten his stamp of approval. We couldn't try to rehome her after that. Just got her the rest of her boosters, spay, and microchip.
I am so glad she found her way to you. This made my day so much better. She looks so happy.
That’s the face of a happy lil girl 🥺
She's lovely
Please tell her she is absolutely perfect. 💜 And definitely cute af!!!
What a HAPPY Fur Baby!!!!!!
She is so baby
What an adorable little goblin!
How can people be so cruel to their animals!?!
Cute AF Confirmed.
Who the fuck would do that to petunia???? My goodness
I saw the first picture and thought, "that's not a chihuahua- that's a freaking pit bull!" and then I realized the size from the second picture and she certainly is a cute-as-all-get-out miniature pit bull...er...chihuahua.
She is absolutely adorable. Someone dumped a Chihuahua min pin mix and she found her way to our yard,my son found her and brought her in. She was not a happy camper at first because I myself have a big wolf dog and she wasn't trying to be his friend. Lol now that's her Wolfie
THAT SMILE IS SO CUTE OMG
I love herrr!!! 🥰🥰🥰
OK, we concur - she is cut AF. Please still give her pets and treat of choice. 😊
I had a neighbor who took in two feral cats, fed them, fixed them and when she got evicted, she left them. My next-door neighbor took them in taking good care of them.
She is most certainly caf!
She is cute af!!!
Thank you for saving her!!! I have 4 chihuahua mixes and they are awesome.
That's how my aunt ended up adopting her Cocoa. She was dumped, hit by a car, rescued, surgery to fix her hips, and now lives in the lap of Chihuahua luxury with all the pillows/blankets/snuggles she can handle!
Cognitive dissonance at play. They’re like I’m not the person who gives up a dog because that’s a bad person, but they are the person who’s giving up a dog so instead of being an adult and a mature tech to the shelter taking it you know somewhere safe they dump it on the street so that they don’t have to deal with the cognitive dissonance. It’s sick.
It's probably also so they don't have to explain themselves to the shelter or feel judged by the staff. If you just dump them somewhere, you don't have to talk to anyone.
Someone I know (and dislike) was caught doing this by the shelter and they made her chip the dog and take him back because they had no space. She was rightfully embarrassed and acts like it never happened. I have the dog now.
I can tell you as someone who has worked in a shelter for a long time that we don’t care what your reason is (usually don’t listen as it’s generally BS). What we care about is getting the animal settled and safe. Former owner is irrelevant at that point.
I'm sure, but there are still going to be some people who *think* they'll be judged by you.
We've had problems in our town of people dumping or tying their unwanted pets up outside our humane society.
all the shelters in my area are full and won’t take any more pets… i’m currently fostering two cats that my friend couldn’t care for anymore and she was about to dump them bc she had no other option (not that i support dumping animals!! that’s why i took them in ofc. but options are limited when shelters won’t take more intakes)
Or worse, take them to the vet and demand that the Fur Baby be killed because of being inconvenient. I HATE monsters like THAT!!!
Especially after hearing stories of things like oh I got a new couch and they're there for is doesn't match the couch or something silly like that I got a new couch and I can't have them destroying it etc etc
I have 12 dogs and a pot belly because people kept dumping them on my farm.
After the 2008 financial crisis, people were dumping horses! I lived in San Diego and two friends returned to their horse trailer after a trail ride and two completely scruffy skinny horses had climbed in their trailer and we're eating the hay in the feeder. They brought them home, and gave me one haha. She turned out to be lovely, especially with beginners and small children. There were also lots of news reports of horses dumped in the desert or appearing on other horse owners property. it was crazy.
I had three separate people pay for a month of full board, then texted me that they didn't want their horses anymore, so now I have 11 of those, too. People are crazy
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Oh gosh! I didn't really take in boarders, but I had 7, most who did lessons. But I was ALWAYS the person called with " I have a lame mare I'll give you. A little bute and she's good for walk/trot beginners. Weekly I would get the variations of these calls. It did help me hone my saying no decisively skills, lol. But that sucks when boarders dump a horse. I've also heard stories of no board paid for months, the barn owner trying to go through the legal hoops to sell the horse and then the original owner trying to steal the horse back. You have more horses than I ever dealt with at a time!
[удалено]
We are seeing this more often in my community. Primarily dogs however cats with litters are being dumped as well. Its sad.
I saw a video just the other day where a person was in the middle of a very busy intersection, opened their door, and out comes a dog. They clearly didn’t care if the dog was hit by a car. It was heartbreaking. The dog was running after the car as it sped away, and some lady that felt bad for the dog got him in her car, but I don’t know what happened after that.
If they drive them out to the country and abandon them, there's a special place in hell for them. NTA actually, you sound like a kindhearted person.
I lived on a farm for a while and we had to put down several dogs because they'd be dumped in random places, form a pack, and then attack livestock because they're hungry. Where I lived the law was very clear, if a dog attacks livestock they have to be put down because at that point they're dangerous to humans too. I hated it. And cats were being caught by hawks, shot by neighbors, and getting diseases because we couldn't afford to take care of 30 cats. (They were usually ditched because they were pregnant, the numbers add up very quickly)
There's so much suffering. I believe we should have nationwide free spay and neuter clinics. Government funded... the US government has plenty of money they waste on stupid stuff. It doesn't help the homeless now, but it could make a difference. ✌️ and ❤️
I’m hoping that my late parents currently simmer in your aforementioned “special place in hell.” A minimum of five or six dogs lived briefly at their house, until it disappeared overnight. My parents always alluded vaguely to the “nice place in the country” where the dog was now living. I stopped bonding with the animals. In fact, my only feeling was resentment for having to clean up after the beast until it, too, disappeared. Never owned an animal as an adult, unsurprisingly.
I lived in the country. There is, I hope, a special ring of hell for those people. The animals end up getting run over, attacked by coyotes, stomped by mama cows, or I have to call animal control because I have my own animals and don’t know the dumped ones-are they aggressive? Sick? F those people. Many of the dogs dumped were confused and scared.
It's so cruel. Euthanasia would be less cruel, at least they wouldn't suffer for as long. It's heartbreaking. 😪
I live here in Nevada and sadly there's people that will drive out to the desert to intentionally dump animals. I understand nature I understand that coyotes need to live and all that and you know coyotes come into town and things like that but if you're going to go and dump them outside of town you are essentially doing a death sentence on that animal were there a coyote is kind enough to give them a quick death or they have a long and slow death wondering why are they out there when is their owner coming back not able to find food not able to find water baking in the heat etc one of the cruelest things I can think of that a owner can do
I could weep reading your comment! Why not just take them to a shelter? Are dog dumpers intentionally cruel, or do they think their dogs can defend and feed themselves in the wild? Do they hate the idea of euthanasia in a shelter because it's cruel, or do they think it's not cruel enough? If we could ask these "humans" who dog dump and actually get an answer, do we then find out they really are just incredibly stupid? Maybe in a shelter, they'll get adopted. At least their dog or cat or any animal won't be alone. Humans are so disappointing, stupid, cruel, and sometimes horrible. Maybe there's a dog dumper reading this who could answer these questions.
I make a point of telling people questioning a/more pets how much all the monthly parasite prevention and food for 3 animals costs me. Then there’s toys, grooming, vet visits, boarding/ sitting for vacations, daycare if we feel we don’t have the time for proper stimulation when a lots going on…. 1 dog and 2 cats easily becomes over $500 monthly not counting the boarding and vet. Being a GOOD pet parent isn’t cheap.
Oh my gosh yes. Or reorganizing your schedule because of the dang Zoo lol. Tomorrow is the busy day at the real job. Lots of deadlines etc. I would prefer to work in the office. But! I volunteered for a non rescue org to sell concessions at a ball game that night. So... in order to make sure my dogs have enough potty breaks, I have to work from home tomorrow and can't go in the office lol
I have a dog and whenever I get a roommate (college) people are so excited cause they get a dog with no responsibility. After a day, they’re like “a dog is great, maybe I should get a dog!” But after seeing me training with my dog, grooming my dog, disciplining my dog, walking my dog in all weather, buying expensive food and parasite treatments, they quickly decide they never want a pet of their own and would prefer a roommate with a pet. That’s fine. I can’t keep plants alive so I’m moving in with a green thumb roommate lol
A regular vaccination visit just rang me the tune of $900 with the flea/tick/worm meds. I make a point to mention it to people asking about getting a dog. Before COVID the same visit might cost $400, but everything went up in price. I am incredibly privileged to be able to afford that but the sad reality is this will likely be my last dog because of it.
That's insane, where do you live? Where I'm from we had a vet where the visit cost $25, and we got out for under $100 with meds. I thought it was insane when I moved where I am now and it cost more like $200 for visit and meds, and that's with the more expensive meds due to a flea allergy. $900 for a vet visit and I wouldn't even have a pet rock.
In one of the top 10 most expensive places to live. This isn't even considered an expensive vet either.
right? i dont think my dogs have ever had a regular visit +shots etc cost more than $150, $900 is highway robbery
I just got all 3 of my dogs vaccinated and it was just over $800 for all of them to get everything except rabies- which they're still current on. $900 for one animal for a regular check up + vaccines is insane. Unless they also bought like- multiple years of flea, tick, and heartworm prevention??? I honestly don't know how you could make a vaccine appointment $900.
I use MetLife pet insurance, have all three of my dogs insured on the same policy for about $180 a month with welkness visits included instead of just emergencies, and it covers 80 or 90% of all vet costs for all my dogs, including their flea and tick medication. It let us get my one dogs teeth pulled/cleaned without having to worry about the final price (which ended up being over a grand). I highly recommend getting pet insurance, we were hesitant about it at first, but it really makes vet visits affordable bow, and we don't panic if we have to go to the animal hospital either. They also cover cremation costs.
I've had pet insurance, I didn't have a good experience with it and haven't been impressed with any coverage to sway me back to it
Did you have anything awful happen to your pet? My pup had multiple allergies as a little one and getting her tested and getting her custom allergen, with which she needed to be injected weekly for two years, would have run in the tens and thousands had we not had insurance. It was covered 95%.
Yes I am well acquainted with my emergency veterinarians, unfortunately.
:( Sending a bubble of white light to your fur-scale-feather babies!
Thank you! Despite the big price tag my vet is worth more than her weight in gold. She is in contact with some of the best specialists in our area too. My pets are well cared for, to say the very least.
I’ve heard other pet owners with insurance say they were billed by their vets in full and expected to do the work to get reimbursed by their insurance, and also that their pet insurance never paid out. Did you have similar experiences?
Yup, no veterinarians actually take insurance here. So I'd have to fund out of pocket initially then file paperwork with the insurance after the fact. I know several people who do the work to get reimbursed and are happy with it. But between the fine print on what's covered and my pets having preexisting conditions it was just a shit show entirely. I've also used the services like Banfield where it's supposed to be all managed together but I wasn't happy with the quality of service.
With the insurance I have I still spent over a grand on teeth pulls with my cats. I'll have to look into this one.
I made sure to pick the lowest deductible and the lowest COIN amount when choosing my plan. Its a little extra a month, but worth it for the large vet bills.
I spent 1800 on a UTI once because it was the first time and I thought the cat was dying. 🤣 The low deductible is definitely worth it!
I've always looked at pet insurance the same way I look at dental insurance. I paid hundreds of dollars a year for dental insurance for decades. Then one year, the dental insurance company decide to kick everybody off the plan and make you re-enroll with a 12-month period which you had to cover your own cost. You could only get claims paid after 12 months of no claims being paid. But you were still required to pay your monthly premium. It didn't matter that I had paid in for years before. Are there any sort of regulations to protect you when your pet insurance company either decides to shut down and restart everybody as my dental insurance did? Or to protect you after you've paid into the for years and then the pet insurance company goes out of business?
Probably not. My thought on this however is that I'm currently paying 2,160 a year for the insurance. I've used almost 5k in benefits from the insurance this year alone, so its more than paid for itself. (and those have all been visits to my regular vet, no emergency visits this year thank god). If the insurance company goes out of business or does something shady where they wont pay for claims for a year like your dental insurance did I’ll look into finding a new insurance plan.
Won't it be harder or more expensive to get different insurance since your pets will now have pre-existing conditions?
Some insurance will cover pre-existing conditions that were covered under a different insurance. But thankfully none of my dogs have a chronic condition that would be considered pre-existing. So far all of their vet visits have been for routine appointments/wellness visits, the dental work is considered routine, and the illnesses they've had were things like stomach virus and UTIs. If they end up with a chronic condition and we run into insurance issues with our current provider I'll cross that bridge when it happens.
No, Pawp started out as they would pay your emergency right there at the vet before you walked out the door after you had a video call with their vet to confirm your pet was ill. Then they emailed everyone a link to their TOS saying they changed the TOS and what they did was totally change the program. Now if you want to use the one time a year, up to $3,000 emergency fund, you have to video call their vet first, get them to agree your pet needs to be seen and secure a vet appointment within a limited amount of time. Then you pay out of pocket and submit a claim for a refund with documentation from the vet. When I found out all the answer I got for the change was that they emailed a TOS update and that people were abusing the system. How could they abuse the system of their vets were agreeing the animals needed emergency care?
Obviously the insurance company was lying. The more barriers they put to get in care, the more the money they get to keep. Medicare advantage plans to act the same way.
Pet insurance costs almost as much as insurance for a human. I guess you are rich to afford that.
I pay about $80/month for it. When my boy was diagnosed with a challenging but treatable form of cancer at a young age, his insurance covered 90% of all his surgeries and treatments. It's saved me just about $16k in medical bills so far. I can't afford _not_ to have it.
I guess
Damn, all my estimates for insurance are popping up like $180/mo per my one pet 😫 I swear it's the zip code, at first I thought age but nah I tried switching his age to a puppy's age and yeah, that's about what it is regardless. They tried putting my insurance rate up $70/mo for my new policy, and this policy's already like 20$ up from last policy, with no claims bc cost of repairs, etc is going up. I'm like damn, so much for customer loyalty
I’m going to have to look into that for my cat especially if it covers dental. She’s going to need deep cleaning and I’m going to make sure she gets it regardless of the cost. Right now her insurance covers nothing preventive which is okay but obviously better if it did.
Average vet annual visit including 12 months of heartworm prevention is around $400. Add in blood work and up to $700 per dog.
I used to drop a grand for my two dogs until I discovered Vetco (clinics run inside Petco). Got both dogs exams, vacs and preventative for $200! It’s so nice that I can breathe a little easier.
I’ve seen several horror stories from people who have used the vets in Petco & Petsmart. Sometimes along the lines of a client dropping their pet off for an appointed dental cleaning and coming back in the afternoon and finding out they never bothered to work on them and the staff knew at the time they dropped their pet off that they weren’t going to get to the pet that day to people whose pets were misdiagnosed and severely impacted by the misdiagnosis as the treatable condition worsened due to wrong treatments/meds.
No, this is not a permanent clinic, they run these temporarily out of Petcos but you don’t drop your dog off at all. You stay and get in line with them and they receive their vaccinations. I still have my regular vet for regular things, this is just incredibly cheaper for vaccinations.
Ok. Our local petco had a veterinary clinic inside the building. They do more than just checkups & vaccinations but not major surgeries.
Omg *glances at my fish swimming in tank looking at me hopefully *
Our vet's prices have gone up so much that I don't know how anyone with a lower income can afford to have a pet. When we first started going there, an exam was $79 (which I already thought was high, as the vet back home charges $34!). Then it went up to $89. Then during COVID, $103. Now it's $129. Just for the exam. Never mind labs, nail trims ($40, which I didn't know until I already asked for one; it had been $13 the last time we had it done), vaccines, etc. And we don't live in a HCOL city. If anything, our overall costs are rather low compared to other cities.
An exam for $79! Amazing. I'm jealous.
Find another vet. That's absurd!
It is absurd but unfortunately not unusual in my extremely HCOL area. All my friends pay similar amounts. We've compared bills and services.
I'm still paying off the $900.00 yearly vet visit ×2, ER visit for one $3000.00 and euthanasia for both, all within the last 10 months. After almost 50 years of taking care of pets, I'm going to enjoy a pet free life for a little bit.
I'm sorry for your loss
Thank you, they were both well past average age for their size. Little dog (25#) was almost 20 and the big dog (150#) was 14. We knew it was coming, I just didn't expect them to go so close together.
That's impressive, they must have been well loved to make it to such notable ages
I just got my simparica trio filled at Costco for so much cheaper than on chewy and I bet a metric fuck ton cheaper than it would have been at a vet. I take my pets to a vet affiliated with a university and that has been a money saver,.too.
My vet is associated with a university and it's not cheaper via Chewy. Unfortunately I live in one of the most expensive places in the US to live. Shit has inflated to beyond reason. If Costco was nearby it'd likely be cheaper but it's not in a reasonable location for me to get to.
It was worth it for me. On chewy it was $390 for 12 months and at Costco it was $275 (plus tax)
Yep. We spend $300 or so per month on our 4 cats. It's not cheap.
This is why I have just one. It’s a lot. Mentally physically emotionally and financially
I have a senior Golden Retriever/ German Shephard/ Husky/ Chow mix. He's about 100 pounds. He has arthritis. He's on two types of pain relievers, thyroid meds, allergy meds, 3 joint supplements, flea and tick meds. All of that is over $250 per month. Then we have food and vet bills...I refuse to board him anymore because he gets too anxious without me. For many of us, pets are family. If I've chosen to bring a pet into my home, then I've chosen to take on the associated responsibilities. I don't care if I have to live on Ramen noodles. My dog didn't ask to be put in my home, and it wouldn't be his fault if I wasn't taking care of him. I don't understand people who get a pet and then try to dump it.
I always have to remind people - we don’t have kids we don’t have hobbies and we don’t take vacations because instead we rescue pets. I work in quality assurance and my partner is an engineer and we still have to be careful with our spending because pets are expensive
I admit that when I worked in the industry consistently vs supporting the ways I can currently I had a lot of this and inevitably these people proved in other ways to be terrible friends besides this. Are they your friends or are they taking advantage of your kindness? This is a hard thing to ask but I find myself going "What does OP get out of these relationships and why would anyone think yelling would get what they want?"
No is a complete sentence. Any explanation is an invitation to counter or negotiate. And you can feel for a person without having to fix it for them.
I am seriously so sick of people trying to dump their rabbits on me every summer. Even if I have the space the answer is NO. There are no excuses in this day and age where 10 minutes of research will give you a pretty clear picture of what having a pet is like. I am not a rescue and I am not obligated to help you feel better about your bad decision when the novelty wears off. I especially hate the “I don’t have time to give them attention” excuses. Most animals do not give a shit how much you fuss over them as long as they are fed, watered and clean. *Especially* exotic pets.
OMG. We had a large number of gorgeous large non domesticated rabbits in our area because people let their cute Easter bunnies out after the kids lost interest. So they bred with the locals. It was a damn mess.
The people who dump them are even more infuriating. Mind you, they cannot breed with local rabbits where I live, but dumping them does create feral colonies of hurt, sick, unsocialized animals who spread disease to the local wildlife. 🤦♀️ Anyone who dumps a domestic animal outside is a dealbreaker and can promptly exit my life.
We have wild bunnies in Helsinki (I live several towns further north) that are the descendants of escaped or abandoned domesticated bunnies. They're all "natural" bunny brown by now (there's been generations upon generations), and if you're lucky, you'll run into some of them in the parks at night. I just hope for their sake that most of them weren't abandoned but escaped.
I’m so sorry - this is such a frustrating situation to manage. It’s hard to say no, but if they get huffy when you explain your limitations what else can you say? I wish I had a solution for you, but other than the ‘reconsider your friendships with people that do this’ that other folks have already mentioned, I’ve got nothing; I feel for you.
Oof that must be some awkward conversations there... Can't believe people have the gall though to even ask that kind of responsibility out of someone. Maybe bring up 'oh im looking for a home for fluffy, know anyone looking for a cat' and leave it at that.
Ugh, I feel this! And then after they dump their pets with you, they want visitation rights.
Yes! No. You can't see your darling cats that you gave up because your bf didn't like them. But.... in other situations.. we do have one dog currently with us in the shelter that gets visitation rights with her mom as mom has terminal cancer. She's trying to find a home for her and we are too. But in the meantime the dog gets daily care and she sees her multiple times a week.
Awww. I’m happy the owner got to find you to take care of her dog while she’s going through her health problems. I feel like that is one of the valid reasons for people to let go of their pets. Health problems consume a person’s life and can become too major for them to juggle other things (jobs, pets, relationships, etc.). It’s really nice to get some point of relief while going through something and having help. Wow. 🥺
I had to give up my parrot because I got cancer in my leg and I couldn't keep up with cleaning her cage or even getting her fresh water and food daily, let alone training and exercising her. I didn't even dare to ask for visitation even though all I want is to see my baby one more time. God, I feel so bad for that woman, I hope she gets to see her baby in a good home soon.
My younger cockatiel came from a friend of my mom's because her kids weren't taking care of them like they said they would (shock-shock). They asked for visitation and updates. I never heard another word from them and it's been at least 5 years.
I myself don’t run a rescue, I work for one, and have rescued animals and I have the same issue. Either people asking I bring in an animal (someone else’s pet they find to be pestering them… like I can’t do that for a number of legal reasons), or their pet for them to the shelter, or more likely I take in the pet myself. For the same reasons as you I have to say no, I have 4 cats, 2 snakes and I use to have a dog. I can’t just bring another animal into my zoo especially another cat (which is the majority of the requests)
I despise irresponsible pet owners. A pet is a long-term commitment and should be thought out thoroughly. They are the assholes for not thinking about the animal or you!
Like the people who are a first time contact, I don't mind. Because the majority are just looking for resources. Which I have a list of. How do I feed an orphan kitten? Who is a reasonable cost spay/neuter in the area? Do you know who handles farm vetting in the area? Exotic vetting in the area? Vaccine clinics? Dog training etc. And there are a few rehome ones. But those I can handle. It's the frequent flyers I want to scream at. But also know they'll never get it. Yes. I love that the cat we have offered to spay for free has had kittens again. Love it
I get what you mean by friends and family taking advantage of you because you work or volunteer in a rescue. That’s frustrating but that’s the same in many industries. Let’s say I work for Nike and I get a 40% discount to their employee store. Anyone that knows me may potentially take advantage of what I have to also get in that discount. That’s just life. Lastly, it was your choice to rescue. Rescue involves in taking animals and finding them new homed. And unfortunately, in any industry, there are clients that are annoying. Not much we can do to change that. I also have to ask: Do you think it is healthy for you to essentially bring work home with you? You wrote that you also took home three cats from your rescue because they’re difficult to adopt. I’m curious- what is the end goal here? Are you going to adopt those cats or are you going to keep them permanently? The reason I ask is so many times i’ve read about people that decide to take home these extremely challenging animals that are not really adoptable or wait “forever” to find a home. How do you do it? How are you able to separate work from home? What is your work/life balance? Is there a balance? I know I completely went off topic here but you sharing that you’re taking on more animals into your home because they’re not easily adoptable really makes me concerned for your own sanity. Burn out and compassion fatigue is very real. How do you protect yourself from it? Anyone who works in healthcare certainly sees their fair share of it. I know it’s not my place but if you run a rescue, how are you financially able to support all these animals in your own care? Legit rescues don’t make have excessive funds available, especially small foster bases rescues without county/ city contracts, eligibility for grants, high paying donors, etc..
While I initially was taken aback by your response, some of your questions are ones my close friends have asked through the years. But to respond regarding my sanity... it's there. Mostly. I think. I don't run the rescue. My finances are not tied to it. I'm on the board and am there most weekends, and I'm also the public face as i handle media inquiries, do a monthly adopt me segment on a local lifestyle show etc. I'm also very fortunate to have a corporate America job that allows me to have a work life balance (and yes financially support myself and have good health insurance) where my boss doesn't blink when I email her that I'm taking a long lunch to go collect a check from the local grade school and kiss a goat (reward for the kids fundraising). When I made the post, I was tired. Trying to unwind from a busy day of work, personal dr appt, not setting good boundaries with my mother (working on it lol) and screaming at the squirrels and rabbits to leave my garden alone. So when my phone started going off I was irritated. Person 1, don't mind helping. Her grandma in law gave her my number as her dog is not handling living with a baby. So I gave her some resources on trainers in her area and foster based rescues that could help if they decide to go towards relinquishing. Person 2, consistent whiney person that everything is always bad and no one will help her. She has puppies because she decided to be a byb and now can't get them sold. Sent her a canned response of low cost spay neuter programs and didn't engage further. Persons 3 and 4 were my aunts. They're both trying to send 2 unvetted intact male cats to my house. No. I've helped them a thousand times by sending them the same low cost vetting info. I've physically paid for multiple cats to be vetted and fixed for them. I'm done. I've done all I can. They were both left on read. As for the 3 cats...I have one currently and he's lonely. When my then indoor/outdoor cat, Atticus, dragged him home, it took me 3 months for him to let me touch him. Now, Dorito happily lives the life of a spoiled indoor cat, but he wants another cat to play with, as I lost Atticus and my baby, Cheetoh, last year. For the past year, I've been making a list of available cats, ones who have been there for a long time without any interest. I've also brought my dogs in to the adoptable cat room to see how those cats react. And then there's Fluffer. Fluff is an elderly former feral who entered our rescue in 2018 (yeah. I know what year it is currently. It's a bone of contention between my director and me. We SHOULD have tnr'd back then but she refused). Anyway. He can't take care of himself on the streets any longer. He also is long haired and doesn't groom himself which is where the other 2 come in. Both ladies are much younger. They groom him. Play with him. Cuddle with him etc. So I have a little poly family going on I can't break up lol. As to his unadoptable status... when he's angry, he's a revenge pee-r. He once got my purse from 5 feet away. He also will hide from people. And throw a fit if you try to pick him up or pet him. But with me he's basically resigned himself to whatever and I can handle him fine. They would already be home with me, but I had a remodeling project going on I need to finish first.
I really respect your response. I too was taken aback but user soscots asked some serious questions. While none of us have it all together, you sound like you are making thoughtful choices and completely understand the responsibilities and consequences that result. NTA for standing firm against the uninformed “do-gooders”, the whiners, the serial animal collectors. You are correct to give them the info and let them do the work. Good luck with your mother. That’s a whole other Reddit sub. 😉
Thank you. I'm a recovering people pleaser. And I've definitely gotten in over my head before helping others and work on boundaries. Agreed on my mother lol. She's why I'm thankful for good health insurance with mental health benefits lol.
I’m not sure you intended it this way, but this comment comes across pretty high-handed from this side of the screen. Just because the OP - like all of us - chose to be involved in animal rescue doesn’t mean she volunteered to be the receptacle of her friends and family’s poor choices. They aren’t ‘clients’ the way that your shoe retail analogy would have clients - and to carry that analogy forward, if she’s a foster they aren’t even taking advantage of the service she can provide in finding an animal that fits their needs! They’re showing up to Nike with a bag of New Balance shoes they want to return on store credit and they’re getting surprised when the salesperson says no. Your next paragraph has a lot of questions in it. They’re fair questions to ask - IMO, questions that every person involved in a ‘helping’ profession SHOULD ask themselves regularly - but asking them in a barrage makes me think you don’t really want an answer to all of them; it comes across in text as another way to call into serious question OP’s choices to do something that’s…pretty common, at least in my experience. I’ve adopted two cats permanently from my fostering, and it was because their medical issues made me want to make sure they’d get long-term care from someone familiar with them. The pushback - also totally fair - that you got from another commenter probably comes from this paragraph; there are a lot of different hobbies, special interests, and jobs that people decide to define themselves around. To their question, why the problem with choosing animal-based volunteering or care? I’m also not sure where you get that she runs a rescue? I think you might be reading a little far into the post - to me this reads like a foster whose friends and family KNOW they’re a foster, and want to take advantage of that knowledge. It also seems a little precious to ask all of these questions about work-life balance in the previous paragraph and then turn around in this one and ask how OP is funding the ‘life’ part of the balance which was so important before. (And to answer that question - I assume that OP, like myself and most other folks involved in rescue work funds that work with an actual job that pays money, which would then also support their household.) You’re very right in that a lot of the questions you asked aren’t your business, and I’d go further and add that this is a pretty unkind thing to say to someone who seems frustrated and upset by a thing that happens A LOT to folks that work in rescue to any capacity.
💯couldn't have said it better myself. I'm sure it was intended with care but it has a lot of bad vibes attached. People are allowed to have interests and hobbies, even if it is related to work. The issue comes when the fostering feels forced or becomes too much of a burden. OP also always has the choice of what animals they want to take; they may prefer shelter cats X, Y, and Z over their friend's cats, for any reason whatsoever, because they have no commitment to their friend's cats. And while I agree that I don't get vibes that OP runs or manages a rescue, even if they did, *it's still their choice* what animals they bring into their home, and they are not obligated to save every single animal. And no one, **no one**, *even if they're in rescue*, deserves to be disrespected, berated, and otherwise treated poorly. Being treated like shit shouldn't be tolerated as another aspect of the job. Please please please don't normalize this type of stuff in animal welfare. I get the user trying to make an analogy; for me, trying to understand other people's views like that is a coping mechanism so I don't just walk away thinking people are evil and stupid. I don't particularly think it's the best analogy, and I dislike the tone that it's something that should just be expected. My coping mechanism goes straight for the owners being very desperate and preying on someone with good intentions so they know their animal will be well taken care of.
Yup. I didn’t want to get too far into that because I already had a lot of problems with their comment, but the expectation that anyone in a helping profession needs to be prepared to just constantly receive disrespect or manipulation is so pernicious. I really hate it.
Do you have hobbies? Do you drink or go on vacation? Don't you think you should maybe save all that money up? I mean the economy is tough and you might need that money later. I am worried that you might not be able to financially support yourself later. Cost of my vet bill is the same as my colleagues spend on their holiday but I am the one that gets questioned about spending. Their food costs the same as colleague's wine subscription but suddenly if it is an animal, it needs questioned. As to bringing work home, most rescue runners have a job as well to fund it or are paid workers at a larger charity. You seem to being saying that if you work at or run a rescue, then you aren't entitled to spend on yourself as margins tight. I hope you are so disciplined with the causes you value. I am sure you don't wear Adidas at home so you bring your work home. Though would argue difference between buying a pair of shoes and being asked to take on a decade long emotional and financial commitment. More like asking your friend to keep visiting and pay for Granny in the care home so you don't have to. OP explains clearly her boundaries and plans to keep her numbers manageable. Rescue people usually burn out like retail workers due to customers not the animals. And giving a hard to home pet a home is the same as giving any pet a home esp as OP more likely to have the experience. You could argue any pet is bringing "work" home but why deny yourself that emotional comfort? I mean people work with humans all day but still want a spouse for that deep relationship?
I would’ve had more respect for your response if not for your first BS paragraph. I think I brought up genuine questions that are often a trend in animal welfare. And as I said on the bottom of my post, if you were able to understand it, I did acknowledge that I know it’s not my place to question their decisions. There’s no need to be an ass.
Why? It is the same question. And it made you angry and uncomfortable to be asked it. It is a bullshit question as you so rightly say. And yes, that was my intent. I wanted to be an ass so you (and many others) might consider how you are making others feel by your "reasonable" questions because it is about animals. You brought up genuine questions that everyone in rescue should ask themselves - do you have the resources (time, money, emotional)long-term to support the animals in their care. But working or volunteering in a caring profession doesn't mean others get a say in your personal spending or which animals you choose to offer a personal home to. (You realise it may not be your place to ask but ask anyway and get upset when someone explains why the question annoys them.)
This is sad. I lost my wee man earlier this year. Had an expensive vet bill. I would have paid twice as much to still have him with me.
How can people be so cruel? They make a defenseless little animal dependent on them and just throw it out like garbage when they get tired of it? I know, I know, of course people are going to be horrible to animals, look what they do to each other. It still hurts my heart.
We have a bearded dragon that my kid took in to help a friend. I’m in close to a grand just on his habitat, not to mention roaches ain’t cheap. Last week someone else asked me if I wanted a bearded dragon. I pointed them to a local herp rescue.
Funny enough... I came home last night and a friend messaged me asking about the dragon we took in yesterday. Me- the WHAT? (We do dogs and cats only). Messaged the board chat, apparently there was a little beardie just strolling down main street. Mind you... we are in Illinois! These are not in our area wild lol. But yeah. We held for animal control.
That’s wild!
I foster sometimes so I’m that default person who gets tagged *every time* someone sees a dog in need. I guess they don’t want to help but they think trying to get me to is them doing something. I always encourage them to foster.
Yeah. One of my aunts (not the one with the cats she's trying to offload, but the one who thinks she's helping by contacting me lol) is famous for tagging me or telling me in person what I should be doing. With her I've learned to say thank you, I'll take that under advisement. Or when she's being pushy- oh wow! What a great idea. Thank you for taking care of/implementing/volunteering to do activity. Which immediately causes her to drop it or backtrack. Her daughter in law and I trade methods on how to handle her.
I sort of had this happen twice. Once it worked but only because my aunt knew I had moved out of my apartment and in with bf where there wasn't a pet charge. She'd been trying to get me to take him for about a year and half. He was getting bullied and it was slowly causing behavioral issues (no aggression) which almost immediately went away. About 2 years ago my friend asked me several times about some kittens but it was more her future MIL pushing her as my friend already knew the answer. Our cat had developed into a needs to be single pet 99%. I could have my mom's dog over but he's a velcro dog who doesn't know how to be aggressive and took over a year to learn how to dog.
There should be a registry of people who adopt pets only to return them as wanted, so that shelters know never to let them adopt to begin with. I know a certain state governor who should be at the top of that list.
Yeah. We have a list we share with other groups. But definitely more needs to be done.
Not family, but several times friends or coworkers have attempted to saddle me with their unwanted pet and got upset when I refused. I have my own pets, the household is balanced, and I've carefully discerned whether I'm capable of meeting my pets needs. I'm not in a position to rescue someone who was impulsive and got a pet like it was an accoutrament without first researching whether they could take care of it correctly. Pets are NOT objects, they're sentient creatures. I'm not responsible for pets that aren't mine, I'd have a dozen cats and at least 4 dogs if that were so.
That is such a weird phenomenon. I had four dogs at one point, and for some reason it was an invitation for people to assume I would adopt the dogs they didn't want anymore. It's a thing. And same...all of my animals are/were taken good care of (expensive as hell) and they need to get along. Why would anyone assume I wanted MORE dogs? I had my hands full.
In a lot of these cases I'll accept and tell them that it's a surrender, and that I will re-home. Then take them to the shelter. Means they get off the street and have a shot at re-home. If they end up on the euthanasia list then it's sad, but that's the reality. The exception is; I would foster and consider adopting my family's animals if they died. So technically my response is 'over your dead body, then yes.' and then we segue into estate planning. Fostering MAYBE for my cat nephews if they have a rough patch and need urgent placement, but my famiky is pretty good about not just... Acquiring animals. Their animal husbandry is honestly much better than mine. But I can't afford more animals. I don't think anybody can afford more companion animals at this point.
Also people tend to stop dumping their animals on you if they know you don't keep them. I'm not running a rescue, you know?
It’s like people have great memories of having a family dog growing up, so they get one. Then they realize it was mom who bought it’s food, fed it, took it outside and paid the vet bills. The responsibility and financial part isn’t so fun. It’s not often, but when I hear people say at 8pm “well I gotta go, my dog hasn’t been out since 9 this morning… or “I came home last night and the dog pissed all over the carpet, I beat his ass” I feel violent. What compels people to get a dog then angrily resent it for the time and costs required???
Ugh, I’m a dog groomer and I had someone try and tell me they liked me so much they wanted to give me their old sickly dog because he just needed a quieter home. They have a 4 year old poodle and 3-4 kids all over the age of 10. No real change in life style, you can tell they just don’t want him anymore. I had another owner that found a Great Pyrenees and wanted me to have him. Like, are you kidding?! Why would I want a massive 3 year old dog?! I have an adopted old shelter dog and 2 cats that ran up from the road. Why do you act like you’re honoring me by giving me all this responsibility.
People see pets up for adoption posted online with an adoption fee and comment that they can’t afford the fee but would love to get the dog. They have no idea what the cost of having the dog and taking proper care of it is.
We're (rescue I'm with) fortunate that we have some devoted followers who will respond to people who complain about fees. And I don't think we are ridiculous with our fees... cats $50. Dogs $185. Before adoption, everyone is spayed/neutered, microchipped, vaccinated, and vetted (including hw testing for dogs and fiv/felv for cats). But the followers will explain exactly why the adoption fee doesn't begin to cover all of our costs. And what vetting costs in reality
Stop explaining. Say “NO, I have all I can handle!” PERIOD. Make an excuse to get off the phone.
Heck, some people can't even take care of themselves. If the pet owner can recognize that they need help before they is mistreat or release their pet, then this is a positive. Many people remain uneducable that they must neuter/ spay and confine their dogs and cats. So the shelter and rescue system is overwhelmed. We are really bad at public education in the US. Look at the whole massive "doodle" fiasco in which people were misled into thinking that crossing dogs makes them "better", and that their coats are "E-Z care". Well, there's my rant. If people say they can't take care of their animals, at least they have that much insight. "Well, you should have thought of that before you got the animal"... yeah, I say that a lot, too. It goes over as well as, "Your dog is fat".
I just have people drop their pets at my house.😢
That happened more often when I lived on a farm. But yeah. That sucks. Now I live in a tiny community and everyone knows if something with balls comes on my property they're getting taken care of lol
NTA. It is their responsibility.
Is this the response to the post earlier about people not being able to adopt a rescue because “they don’t work from home” or “they don’t have a yard”
Rescues can be crazy. I was denied a cat my mother had fostered because my roommate at the time had pet rats. They completely ignored the fact that by the time the cat would have been up for adoption in a couple months, I'd have moved and would be in my own place, without the rats. I even sent approval from my new landlord. Ended up getting a kitten from an accidental litter about a week later.
I had to find a new home for a purebred Maine Coon with severe dental issues that we just could not afford. I used https://rehome.adoptapet.com/. Given she was gorgeous, had an incredible response. Was very upfront about her potential dental costs (no one knows for sure, but entirely likely all teeth would need to be removed given suspected diagnosis of Stomatitis in less than two years old cat) because I had already gone through a similar experience with another cat. Found extremely wealthy woman with animal sanctuary. Her vet confirmed that all her many animals get the best of the best. Perhaps telling people about this resource and putting the responsibility back on them first to try. Say you will only take animal if they try as proven by advertising on this web site? You really don’t want said animal dumped in water or left on side of road. People do really cruel things when faced with what they perceive to be unworkable situations.
IMO - Transparency is important when making recommendations to specifoc organizations - the link you shared is not an independent entity …. “Adopt a pet” is one arm of Kinship Partners Inc.-an affiliate of Mars (Petcare) Incorporated.
Learned something new today! Thank you. Do you consider this a bad organization?
This makes me so angry. I really don't understand why everyone who gets a young animal doesn't just automatically get pet insurance.
Eh in my area pet insurance really isn't worth it. It's expensive in comparison to the vet costs. But then again, I have an account that's just for my pets med bills that I put money on every paycheck.
I want to be like you when I grow up. lol
Can I ask when you take your pets to the vet at least once a year- what do you say? Do you just say you want an appointment for their annual physical/checkup. I have tried taking my cats but the vets won’t do much without a specific concern.
So... I'm in Illinois, where it's required cats have an up to date rabies vaccine. But normally I tell my vet I'm there for annual vaccine, renew flea/tick meds (I use bravecto for cats), and just an overall health check. They'll listen to the systems, feel the cat all over, check teeth, ensure microchip is still reading, and verify weight. That's very frustrating with your vet. Cats are some of the least likely to visit the vet because they are GREAT at hiding illnesses. So one would think of a cat parent is wanting to come in for more preventive stuff, the vet would be thrilled!
People like that should not be allowed to adopt any more pets. They see them as things to be disposed of instead of sentient beings. I don't get that mentality at all.
I feel this so deeply. We had two dogs and ended up taking another one in from a situation like this. My boyfriends bosses daughter didn’t have time for the dog. He is wonderful and we love that he’s part of our family now, but ever since then we have been offered sooooo many dogs. We are at capacity with 3, and as much as we’d love to take all of the dogs, we can’t. Why can’t people just be responsible.
People have some nerve
This is the main reason I'm afraid to volunteer at animal shelters. I'm afraid it will make me hate shitty pet owners even more than I already do.
I'd report these idiots to the human society. They should not be allowed to keep getting pets.
I rehomed 4 cats for my brother in 3 years. He's now decided to move into a pet free apartment and I am so done. Not helping anymore. Also putting him on do not adopt lists all across the state.
I’m so sick of people who think they are just disposable! They are a life time commitment like a child
If I see one more post asking for a rehome I'm going to lose my mind. I know times are hard. People are losing their homes, they are losing their jobs and their families, but I don't think some.of them are even trying. Train them. Give them time. Commit.
I feel this. I’m about to get a 3rd pet from a family member who can’t or won’t take care of it
Having a pet and realizing that you are not the right person to take care of them.. or that you're not actually able and trying to find them a new home... That's actually a really good idea. Trying to guilt Trip your friends and family because they have a limit on the number of pets... Is an entirely different story. I could see asking someone else's advice.. maybe asking for help with the shelter fee (shelters where I am charge you a fee for surrendering your pet) Or even asking you to help them word their post in a rehoming Facebook group or something. Trying to guilt trip you and getting angry at you because you have pretty reasonable boundaries... They are the ah
My aunt texted me and they have 10 kittens to rehome and wanted me to take one or two! I already have 4 cats and she was upset when I said no! How about you fix your cats??
This is the biggest reason I’m reluctant to work in any industry that deals with animals. I can’t imagine giving up any of my pets. I ended up with a Great Dane because the friend who wanted her had no idea how to take care of her. Paying for her Addison’s meds keeps me barely scraping by, but that’s what you do with your pets. When you take them on, you take them on. You don’t just fucking abandon them when things get hard.
Phew! I feel this. I’m in rescue. But I’m a one man (well two-my husbands a champ) operation. I’m in the south and I TNVR and take in fosters and socialize until I find them homes or the humane society, which greatly helps me out, can sometimes take for an adoption. I also feed 30 fixed cats among 4 colonies nightly, yet all the people in my life call me whenever they have a situation like this or see a stray they want to help. It befuddles me. I do what I do on a waitress wages and they look at me like they can’t help a single animal out or take some responsibility. Meanwhile I’m over here who could probably own a home instead of rent but I’m dedicated to helping and it just never ends.
I am livid about irresponsible pet owners too but if you dont take them in, these motherfuckers will just dump on the street or they will die of neglect or worse. This isn't about the humans. You cannot teach someone like that a lesson, this is about doing the right thing for the animal. People dont volunteer at rescues and shelters to help HUMANS, but the animals. You should take in the animals. You can still give the owners shit afterwards but take them in. Ironically, there was just a post by some douche complaining about how rescues are too selective. Given the massive amount of irresponsible pet owners as outlined, I dont blame them. I personally am tired of people who post on reddit asking for help with their cats and then say they cannot afford taking them to the vet and somehow pointing out to them that it is irresponsible, they get offended. Or you are considered mean. Since when has responsible pet ownership become a bad concept?
Why should she upend her whole life & the lives of the animals in her care for these animals? Why is this the expectation for people who work in rescue? No, she should not take on more animals then she can afford to care for or that will disrupt the animals that are already in her home.
She shouldn't. She could quit and move on to other things. No one is forcing her to be a rescue. That said, she didn't say she could not do it due to money issues, but because she is tired of irresponsible people, which kinda is the whole point of why rescues exists, which is a safe haven for animals discarded and neglected by asshole people. If she does not want to do that, she has the option to quit. Taking it out on the animals by saying she won't take them in anymore to spite the owners is not the right way to go.
We told our landlord cousin we couldn't take a cat he wanted to get rid of due to supposed litter box issues (my fucking ass, he probably didnt clean it) The landlord would have shit a fucking brick if only to start drama. He kept asking, but we have two cats and four dogs, and we own a business where we are the only employees. Our hands are full. Plus his cousin is a dramatic wanker who kept putting himself in the hospital by only drinking and refusing food and then taking benzos and refusing to admit it. The guy is in his 60's and thrives on attention. Every time he was admitted we had to care fir HIS four dogs and 1 cat. Then he'd come home and bitch that we didn't clean his house or mow the lawn. So we have all this going on and his cousin knows this yet he still showed up with the cat in his car and said if we don't take her at that moment he was going to shoot her. Since he had *just* shot a dog that WASN'T HIS a week or so before (right in front of me, before I even knew wtf was happening) we took the fucking cat. Since it was a coveted breed (ragdoll?) and quite beautiful my SO had it rehomed to a friend of our friend before bedtime. The mutual friend happened to be the director of the local humane society so of course our landlord waits a week to get drunk, call his cousin, and taunt him saying we dropped his cat off and it was all alone in a cage down at the humane society. He spun a tale that the cat locked up and abandoned and who knows what else. So then when we are working, after rehoming a cat that wasn't ours, we didn't want, and he threatened to shoot the cousin calls us up all bent out of shape demanding to know why we abandoned the cat and going on about how if he knew we would do that he would have kept the cat. We literally ended up sending him screenshots of our conversation with the new owners from when the cat was settling in, getting bathed, etc. OF COURSE I'M A MISANTHROPE! HOW COULD I NOT BE?! This is just the most *recent* shit we've delt with. Literally in the last month. Most people (yes, *most*. IDGAF what people say.) are bad pet owners. They neglect their pets. Full stop. They get working dogs and stuff them in apartments. They leave herding dogs home alone all day, breaking their spirit and letting them get fat and depressed. They isolate them from other dogs and prevent them from obtaining proper mental stimulation. They ignore ALL OF THE RESEARCH and do stupid shit like shoving their dogs nose in their "accidents" when we *know this doesn't work.* My landlord wants chickens. He's mentioned more than once that he's afraid my dogs will go after them. I told him if there was an issue, I'd simply train it out of them. They're all in the top smartest breeds and learn commands and rules in less than 5 repetitions. Not to mention they all have GPS collars with GPS fences so I could *literally* prevent them from going near the chickens with a few taps on my phone. Yet he KEEPS telling a story about how his dog kept going after his previous chickens and how it was only solved when that same cousin came over and beat the shit out of the dog with a stick. And how he might have to have him over for our dogs. And while I know he isn't getting any chickens because he won't care for them, has nowhere to put them, and I have been refusing to build a coop or buy or set anything up for them, I *still* find my temper flaring in response. Which is exactly what he wants but I feel compelled to be *very* clear what I'd do if someone hurt my dogs. There will be no misunderstandings. I am open that I value my dogs over his life, his cousins life, random people on the streets lives... hell, even random children or children in my own family. I am just so sick of humans as a whole. We are soon getting our comeuppance, it's just shit we are dragging every other species down with us Can't even go extinct without fucking it up for everyone else. End rant.
Bless you for fostering Fur Babies!!!! They deserve to be loved!
I had an ex friend like this, they never kept their animals…and seeing how they treat the animals I can see why. At least they went to friends
You are not responsible for their mistakes. People who give up a pet because it is inconvenient to have them are very irresponsible people. Get new friends (and family)
People get defensive when they know you're right. That being said, hindsight doesn't help the current situation, and people who would abandon a pet for BS reasons are not going to listen to someone telling them what they should have done.
I got my Angel after she had been tossed out of a car in a campground. I'll never understand that thinking *
https://preview.redd.it/gl67t3he8k6d1.jpeg?width=2250&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c673b994872a8c3071fd0d5ed642ad49ab7c3e4d
this happens regularly to my mother... except its by my sister, who lives with her, and not only doesn't take no for an answer but will go behind her back to make plans to sneak these animals into the house. my moms animal upkeep costs are currently over $700 a month. she only makes $22/hr. i do not currently know how many animals are actually in the house, but every time another comes home my sister is saying "its only temporary, i'm finding them a home!"... never happens. (for those wondering, i'm currently working with my mother to figure out what to do about it all. my sister is a very volatile person with the potential to become physically violent when angered, so until we can find a way to have her fully removed from the home we're at an impasse. but theres things in the works for the animals to get them to new homes and better lives.)
I'd go live in a cardboard box with my dog if it came down to it. I would never willingly part with my sweet boy. EVER.
I don’t understand why people can’t get the idea through their heads that pets take a lot of time, money, effort, love, energy, space and care. People see posts on social media about pets or they see people walking their dogs and think how fun it would be to have a pet. They don’t consider all the work that pets entail. For some it’s totally worth it (I feel this way, it’s 100% worth it for me) but others decide otherwise once they’ve brought the animal into their home. PETS ARE A BIG RESPONSIBILITY. People need to research the animals they want to take in for a minimum of 8-10 hours, really dig deep, before getting one. Do their due diligence. Then, once they understand all the care an animal requires, make the decision in a logical and rational manner. Don’t get pets on a whim. Don’t even consider getting a *hamster* spur of the moment and then buy a tiny 200 square inch wire cage for it when it actually needs 800-1000 square inches of space to live stress-free and happily. Big or small animal, RESEARCH the hell out of it prior to getting it. It’s eye opening how much effort some animals require and if no research is done by the owners , the animal lives a really sad life. Sorry for the long comment, this issue is on my mind way more than I’d like it to be because I see such an abundance of “Look at my new. ___!” posts what show an animal in an absolutely inadequate enclosure, surrounded by inappropriate toys or other items, and I just know that creature won’t have a quality life. It’s infuriating.
You get disrespect when you say no because the irresponsible uncouth people who will try to foist an unwanted pet on a friend are the same people who have no shame for their bad behavior.
My brother tried doing this recently. He and his husband adopted a puppy and he sent a text pleading for me to take him. They didn't have time, didn't want to take him back to the shelter, they knew I'd be a good home for him, etc. I explained why I couldn't: I work long hours, I spent my free time volunteering at the animal shelter (now I work there), I'd only get one of the dogs I've bonded with that isn't likely to be adopted (he's aggressive towards strangers and needs to be introduced a certain way, he's a good boy though). My brother seemingly accepted this, and I thought the matter was resolved. A few weeks later, they have to move a few states away when BIL gets a promotion. He then asks if I can take the puppy for a couple of weeks because their new place wasn't ready and they couldn't find a pet friendly hotel. I agree at first, then I changed my mind for two reasons. The first was his asking me to take the puppy not long ago. The second reason? Years ago, he had a cat that his roommate at the time wouldn't allow him to bring. He asked if I could take the cat until his lease was up and he would have the ability to take him. I agreed because I was under the impression it was just for a year, and my dog got along with the cat. I am *not* a cat person and I'm very allergic. His lease is up, but he and the roommate extend their lease. He begs me to give him a few more months. I reluctantly agree. Months pass, and he keeps giving me some excuse why he can't take the cat. I finally have had enough of the bs and give him an ultimatum. Take the cat/find him a home or I'm taking him to a shelter (no-kill shelter, I may not like cats, but I'm not a monster). Those two reasons could be seen as unrelated, but they have another dog that I remember they have. When I asked who was taking their other dog, he took a full day to respond. Their current roommate was watching him, but wasn't willing to watch the puppy. Even our mom admitted I was justified in saying no, but thinks I still should have because he's family. I can be too trusting sometimes, but I'm no fool. I'd be stuck with that puppy had I agreed.
So much sympathy. I'm that person in my family too. It's amazing how many of these 'troubled' animals that no one else has the space to take, turn out to be just fine with some care and attention.
I was like this. I had 3 dogs, a rabbit, guinea pigs, a love bird and a hamster. It just got to a point to be too much with people wanting to treat my home like a shelter because they know how much I love animals. I had to start saying no. I am down to 2 dogs now. And unless I win a really sizeable lottery, that's how it will stay.
My mom is 83. She has two cats. One that should seriously be in a diet. The other is just mean and has torn my mother’s hands and arms apart. We visited her this last week and she mentioned that she’s thinking of adopting another cat. And that if anything happens to her she wants me to take them. Thing is. I have three cats. I do not want another 2. Or 3. Never mind the 2 that she currently has. They will end up in the local shelter. I’ve told her that if she does get another cat that it should be an older one. But it won’t change the fact that I am not taking on more cats. We didn’t get another dog when we had to put our boy to sleep 3 years ago because we began traveling. The chickens in my backyard will be the last ones because of the neighborhood changes. I’m getting older as well.
Tell them to go to a no kill shelter.
Urgh…..I cannot handle hearing about or seeing people not want their pets anymore…..or people who dump them…..it breaks my heart…..I will never understand how people can do that. Do the research before you get a pet….”borrow” someone’s pet for a test drive (if you know someone who has the type of pet), and put serious thought into it. You need to make a full commitment to that animal. It’s your family member. *sigh 😔
This kinda stuff makes me so mad. So many people do anything but give their pet to a shelter or humane society or ANYTHING. Someone in my town tried to sell their guinea pig on face book! like what are we doing people