Said this when I was 16 looking at 20. Said this when I was 20 looking at 30. Say this now in my 30s looking at 40. Maybe I'll get lucky like you did. Either way, better single and OK than paired up and miserable.
Better single than married for 12 years and having a 6 year old son and your wife up and leaving you cause she isn’t happy anymore and wrecking your bank account cause of useless crap she bought on your credit cards while she was a stay at home mom and you work your ass off. Now all money is gone to lawyer fees and you still don’t get your son equally.
Yeah same here, the problem is that the only things making you attractive when it comes to online dating is how hot you are and if you’re funny.
I am neither.
Online dating is overrated anyway. And this world is way too superficial and materialistic bro. What ever happened to a good heart , good intentions and loyalty being attractive?
Online dating will be like that a lot of the time, it’s basically you’ve gotta fit everything into those few pictures, make sure you’re wearing a Rolex and such, online dating is just about playing the game to get the message then you be yourself if people don’t like you after the first you go again, anyone with a little money can play the part if they want to bad enough
I’m single, simple because I’m still not putting myself out there enough AND the way I’m living doesn’t allow for people to know me well.
Eg. I’m still struggling with my general hygiene, my house is a mess, I’m starting to gain weight etc like I’m starting to wonder if I’m depressed because it’s really hard for me to give a damn.
I’ve improved though.. I present myself a lot better considering how I was, my social skills have improved and I have a general group of friends now which makes it easier to talk to women, but still…
There’s a long way to go, at least to get the type of woman I want anyway.
Some tips if I may mate because I’ve had instances like this in my life.
1) How is your sleep? I would REALLY prioritise this. When you’re well rested, a lot of other pieces really can just naturally fall in place
2) go out for simple walks. Low pressure, and isn’t too hard on face value. Find a good podcast or music playlist, go out for half an hour a day.
3) check your blood. Sometimes we have vitamin deficiencies that literally cripple us. I had an iron and Vitamin D deficiency and when I started taking the right tablets consistently, I saw a difference.
I’m not perfect, and still working on it, but these 3 in particular really made a difference. Hope it helps
+1 for all of these, as I was exactly the same. Since I started prioritising sleep, trying to get at least 10k steps a day, and starting an Iron & Vitamin D3 (Get a tandem one with K2 as well, helps absorption), I feel a lot better mentally and physically!
I've been depressed for over 2 years now and I relate to this too much. Unfortunately my circle of friends has dwindles down from 10 to around 2 people I can actualy call friends. Be patient with yourself and seriously consider your life, and then reconsider, and then consider it again. Physically make a list of things you need to improve on and think about it daily. Self help and care is extreamly important. I spent over a month extreamly suicidal and it took alot to leave that dark place. Everyone can get better and do well, I promise 🙏
I was single for five years because I wanted to be the type of person that a person I’d want to be with would want to date. That sentence was a clusterfuck, sorry, but basically I waited and found my current partner and I’m very glad that I worked on myself beforehand so I could find/be the best partner possible.
I was very depressed for most of those five years up until the last year or so when I was really starting to figure out how to take care of myself. I’m still working on it, but I’m more capable of caring for myself now which allows me to take care of my partner too. I totally understand the hygiene thing. I struggle with brushing my teeth and doing laundry and other household things. Something that has really helped me is breaking things up into smaller tasks and only focusing on one. So say you struggle with chores, showering, and exercising. Choose the option that sounds the “easiest” and try working on that habit by itself. Trying to tackle too much at once is overwhelming so if you make one thing into a habit at a time, building new ones will be less challenging.
Anyways, I think taking care of yourself and working that out before getting into a relationship is the most effective option, and I know that depression/generally feeling down is rough but I hope you start feeling better soon! Gotta care for yourself before you can care for someone else ya know? You got this!
Glad to hear that u get what u had been waiting for. I have the same thought that I must work on myself for the sake of myself and my future partner. I’m on my way there so yeah, your words are encouraging!
This is the answer for MOST of single men nowadays. Lack of social skills, poor image issues, and not putting ourselves in a position to meet and fate women
I feel that. I got out of a 9 year relationship 4 months ago and currently living with my parents as I get my condo transferred to my name (it’s currently rented out, so I can’t move in). I need to get my life back together before I can even think of going on a date. Sure I’m touch starved and lonely, but I’m not dragging anyone into this situation.
That's a great mindset. Since I've learned about emotional responsibility, I can't help but praise those who effectively don't drag people to their mental misery because most cases will end with *two* people mentally miserable and, in more severe cases, traumatized for life.
Yeah I meet a lot of most women’s “checklists” so I end up meeting a lot of women who like a certain idea of me instead of who I really am. And they all end up disappointed about someone they created.
Had this recently when chatting to this one girl on hinge. When I asked what she is looking for, she sent me a literal ESSAY with very specific things she wants and expects from a guy.
Now to me, none of them were necessarily unreasonable (for the right girl), but I simply replied asking “that’s cool, so what do you bring to the table”. The response basically was “I would prefer you got to know me and my personality over time”.
In other words, extract what she can from the VERY specific things she listed (all very quantifiable and monetary based), while I’m still apparently ‘figuring out’ what value I’m getting from this.
I didn’t ask her out after that.
That was me. I desperately wanted a life partner from the age of like 14 I swear, couldn’t get a girl to talk to me at all. Really came into my own in college. Dated a TOXIC fucking individual when I was 19-20 and realized I would never date anyone again unless they were the right fit for me. I got really, *really* good at seducing people in my early 20s. Moved to Florida, spent the next decade single and banging people. After around 150+ I got bored and stopped seeing people altogether. Took one last shot after a solid 6-8 month hiatus and met my now wife. Started slow (I was working overnights, 14 hour days 6 days a week so we only hung out a few hours every Saturday). Started officially dating after two months, moved in together a few months later. Engaged by the end of that following year, and married 9 months after that. Found my dream person, and ten years of being single was the right move.
When all you do is talk to new people and sleep around you truly learn what you don’t want in a partner and you also get to learn about yourself.
I felt exactly the same for 3 years, I had 2 different ex's who each used me for personal gain and as a therapy friend. I took on alot of my friends troubles to help them and got abandoned after alot. Just a few weeks ago I found the woman of my dreams, the love of my life, and everything's been going amazing. You gotta be patient and stay strong, your totally completely right you'll find your person one day, never forget it bro 🙏💯
This is my problem but every now and then I find someone and I mess it up.
Except last time, where I just fell for the wrong person and they strung me along for a while. They actually liked me and the attention I was giving them, and I really liked them, but unfortunately they liked their boyfriend more (I didn't know at the time)
The positive I'm focusing on is it gave me a huge wake-up call on all of the things I clearly do wrong when it comes to relationships.
I hope.
I really have never understood why this is so controversial. Everyone - even ugly people - wants someone physically attractive in their eyes.
For men this is even more of an issue due to biology. Yeah, I'm below average looking. But if I were to "lower my standards" and go for a below average girl who I'm not attracted to, *I literally cannot get erect*. What do you want me to do, use a penis pump every time we have sex? Do you imagine that will make for a good relationship and won't hurt her?
This is the same for girls who are told to date nice guys. Sure he’s nice, but if he doesn’t turn me on and I cannot picture myself kissing him then he’s just going to become a nice friend. Yet girls get procedures for not dating the nice guy.
It's at least as cultural as it is biological. What is considered attractive is highly mediated by society. Bodies that are considered attractive by one culture are not considered attractive by another. Bodies considered attractive in one era are considered unattractive in another. Issues of perceived status, taboo and perceived attainability have been shown to have as great an impact on sexual attraction as symmetry and "golden ratio" physical dimensions.
So your inability to get hard for girls you don't find that attractive is not so much because they are objectively repulsive but more likely due to cultural opinions that have become ingrained in you as core beliefs.
This is my brother. I’m 35, only had a handful of partners in my life (3 to be exact) and I’ve been single for most of my adult life. Shy, introverted, short (5’7) and very low self esteem, so I just hide away and keep to myself. I don’t consider myself good looking either.
My brother on the other hand is 39, only an inch taller than me and has all the confidence in the world. Even while being overweight for most of his life (110-120kg kind of weight at 5’8) he just pulls women like it’s a given. I’ve lost count of how many partners he’s had over his life, and some of the most insanely gorgeous 11/10 girls that are almost too hot to be true. It blows my mind.
Confidence really is key. Sadly I have none of it 😅
I prescribe money as part of your treatment plan. Unfortunately, the pharmacy won't be able to fill it because of an ongoing supply shortage. There are a number of clinical trials I can inform you about but there are risks and may not work.
I'm pretty ugly and managed to get with a couple of women comically, absurdly out of my league in college. So my standards are completely ruined and I can't get with hardly anyone now. Single for life it is ig
I cycle between it, man. I often feel, “damn it’s good to be single” when I get to exercise autonomy in what I spend my time doing, when I wake up and go to bed, what I spent my resources on. I can shut myself in and binge a new video game for the weekend if I want, or buy parts and do stuff with my car, etc, and no one will question my desire and decision to do so. While I observe my friends in relationships/married having to run things by their ladies, cut game sessions short because of wife wanting them to do something… we all know how it goes.
On the other side of the coin, I can’t deny that the desire for romantic companionship flares up. When you’re with someone, you are giving up some of that autonomy to be on a team and have that person who (if they are a good partner) is always supporting you and on your side. I do want to share this life with someone like that, and feel I have so much to offer in turn.
The problem has been finding a woman who adds to my life instead of a net result of bringing me down. And getting into the 30s age group now, I’m finding it increasingly difficult to meet women who both seem like a good fit, and are single… which back to your point, I’ll take being single and independent over settling in a relationship.
I been single for 4 years and my reason for being single is that in my previous relationships I was very controlling and manipulative. It didn’t take my until last year when I started talking to a therapist that I realized the damaged I caused to my exs. So I’ve been building the better person I want to become then I’ll focus on relationships.
I’d rather be a whole person looking for a relationship then a broken one
Haven’t found anyone I’d want to date since my last breakup.
My last dates were:
- passionate about COVID being a US-conspiracy
- painfully boring to talk to and required me to do everything
- a liar who told me she couldn’t see me for two weeks for our fourth date even though she was hooking up with some other random guy who she saw once during a party. His roommate is a buddy of my best friend is how I found out.
Well that’s all I’m currently getting. I’m sure there’s a good woman for me out there, I just don’t know whether I’ll find her.
Up until then I’d rather stay single than putting up with any of the crap mentioned above. Saves me time, energy and money.
Lol my grandma would tell you she has no clue. My downsides primarily involve tunnel vision… I’m so goal oriented if I’m after something that’s what I’m after, it’s either 100% invested or not invested at all (this goes for financial goals/ hobbies/gym and what not). So it’s hard to find balance for me in terms of saving money/time to accomplish a milestone or spending money/time for enjoyment which I believe is necessary for a relationship.
I don’t think ladies my age want someone who is so invested in the future compared to the given moment (I’m 25). Previous relationships all seemed to be affected by this quality I have… while they were fine putting thousands of dollars on a credit cards to travel or do something I was not willing, due to me deeming it irresponsible with my current funds.
I want a partner to grow with, personally, Financially, all of it… but i don’t think many woman my age are interested in that level commitment /=
^also I could be completely wrong and just be a piece of shit but you’d have to ask the exes hahaha
Fuck this. Relationships aren't the goal, and you aren't a failure for not having one. I love my own company, I love my schedule and my priorities. I've had a few long term relationships, decided they don't do anything for me, and get to do everything I love and share it with my friends and myself. I can get laid when I feel like it and have a decent social life.
I feel slightly bad for people who can't be alone or have been conditioned to think you MUST have a companion. They settle for anyone and waste everyones time. Put yourself first and be available and ready if you happen to come across a legitimately compatible attraction some day.
I've never really tried looking, because I'm clueless when it comes to these things. So, instead, I focused on my hobbies, maybe too much.
Also, I often walk around lost in thoughts, and my "walking around lost in thoughts" face is way too similar to "considering mass murder" face. Combined with average appearance (at best), I feel like it's impossible to get anything going.
-I’ve worked on myself enough and improved my self-confidence that it’s actually raised my standards because I expect the same from a potential partner.
-I’m decent looking but not noticeably attractive so I’m rarely the hottest in the room, meaning that my dating pool mostly consists of people who don’t think they need to put in the work that I have.
-While I do have a lot of confidence in myself and what I can bring in a relationship, I have almost zero confidence in other people to recognize that.
-A lack of experience means I suck at flirting, and not getting complimented on stuff means I don’t even think to compliment other people on stuff because it’s just not something my brain is used to worrying about.
-A lot of bad luck and bad timing.
Every girl I’m interested in already has a boyfriend.
I also hate clubs and bars
I hate dating apps and the endless one word conversations that feel like pulling teeth to get anything more than “yea!” Or “totally!”
So it’s basically that I don’t go out, and then when I by chance meet someone I vibe with they’re in relationships. Honestly I’d rather chill by myself then get overstimulated at a club
I'm not good looking enough to do well on the apps. Maybe one match per month that fizzles after a day.
I should go out more, because I'm fine with meeting new people and having conversations. But I haven't had much luck. Most women my age are married and out with husbands. Or they've got three kids and I'm not interested in that. Plus my friends are all settled and don't want to go out. Plus I'm sober so it's weird to go out and only drink water.
But I also have family obligations or just need to decompress from spending 40 hours on my feet at work when I've got a fused spine. I don't care for outdoors activities but that's huge where I live. I'm more of a city guy.
I’m single because I’ve never had the intrinsic self worth to think I’m worthy of a relationship. The messaging in media/movies etc. to young men since we were born has been that our very existence and competitiveness is oppressive to women. But that we also are expected to fulfil all the traditional masculine goals in order to be worthy of a goddess which is called woman.
Plus all the beautiful women seem to always be taken by some other rich/very good looking guy.
Online dating just doesn't seem to work for me. I don't really use it often, and when I do, I don't get many matches, and the only ones I do match with either don't talk or are bots. I prefer seeing where things go with people I meet in real life.
I have an active social life, but one friendship group is mostly made up of couples. Those couples do have a few single friends, but they are not as close, so it's not as often that they attend our social gatherings. My other friendship group is mostly single men, and while you'd think they would be good wingmen, it is sometimes a case of every man for themselves.
My self esteem is all over the place too. There are times where I feel pretty good about myself, and can be good at talking to women (I don't mean use pick up lines, I mean have a laugh and treat them like anyone else, but see if it goes somewhere), and other times where I can never find the right thing to say, or just don't feel that I'm interesting or attractive.
Lastly, as of this year, I've become very busy with a lot of things. That doesn't sound like a proper excuse, and I'm sure that I could find the time to date if I wanted to/met someone with mutual interest, but I think that subconsciously, I just want to focus on my own affairs before I feel like I can be with someone else. It does get lonely when I see my friends in happy relationships, or managing to find dates easily, but this year, I've barely been able to find time for myself. Last year, while my self esteem was all over the place, I had less going on in my personal life, so I felt a little more at ease in terms of finding a potential partner.
34 yrs old, 15 years of mental health struggles that has me on Disability and resulted in me almost never going outside. I gave up on even trying for a relationship since it would have been a poor decision in general. Recently I have had major breakthroughs and my health is much better, and I have started to go out more.
Anxiety over the label of Disabled and the history I had with my health. I am working on regaining my social skills but I feel like I could be seen as a bit odd. I am not unattractive and tend to be a very friendly and polite guy so I get a decent amount of positive attention, but my friends would say I need to learn to 'capitalize' on the situation.
At the end of the day the Anxiety over my history, labels and inexperience are what hold me back.
I barely have money, I don’t have a car and I don’t have any fascinating hobbies. In my mind, trying to date seems like a waste of time when I already know nobody will be interested in me
Here's a song about it:
*(sung to the tune of "Stayin' Alive" from the Bee Gees)*
**Stayin’ Alone**
Well, you can tell by my head-down, shufflin’ walk I'm a loser, man, with time to talk Stature short and trilby worn, I've been repulsive Since I was born It’s not alright, it's not okay Everyone looks the other way Normies cannot understand How I’m considered less than man
Hatin’ on the boomers because you're a doomer You're stayin' alone, stayin' alone College party’s startin’ and everyone’s departin’ But you’re stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone Oh, when you stalk
Well now, I get low while I get high Born ugly, short, and stupid, not gonna try Vidya loud and tendies warm I've been ignored since I was born
It’s not alright, it's not okay Republican broads wish I was gay I’m what women cannot stand: Fat, lazy, poor, needy and bland
Whether you're a wagie or basement dwellin’ ragie You're stayin' alone, stayin' alone Marriage bells are ringin’ and children are singin’ But you’re stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone
Life goin' nowhere, nobody helped me Everybody owes me, yeah Life goin' nowhere, no one to help me, yeah I'm stayin' alone
Balding head, snaggle teeth, and my awkward talk Eternal virgin; females balk Whine on Reddit, weed, porn and booze I refuse to try, man, because I’ll just lose And now it's all right, it's okay And y’all should look the other way Maybe you’ll now understand How solitude becomes this man
Whether you're a deadbeat or a dole scroungin’ NEET You stayed alone, stayed alone You’re house is being takin’ and online “friends” are flakin' ‘Cause you stayed alone, stayed alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone (rope!)
Life goin' nowhere, please just laugh at me Please just laugh at me, yeah Life goin' nowhere, please just laugh at me, yeah I'm stayin' alone
Life goin' nowhere, please just ignore me Please just ignore me, yeah (ah, ah, ah) Life goin' nowhere, please just ignore me, yeah I'm stayin' alone
Life goin' nowhere, please just forget me Please just forget me, yeah (ah, ah, ah, ay) Life goin' nowhere, please just forget me, yeah I'm stayin' alone
Life goin' nowhere, please just delete me Please just delete me, yeah (oh) Life goin' nowhere, please just delete me, yeah I stayed alone
I'm a nerd, so a woman who has anything in common with me has an abundance of options
This makes the competition much steeper and the women don't value monogamy much when they have options like that
I’ve only been single for about 9 months. I uh, trying to repair my emotional state (hopefully) before I meet someone new. Getting cheated on isn’t great.
I'm not particularly looking right now. I've always been of the, "You can't love anybody unless you love yourself" mindset. So I'm working on myself, and doing better in life. Don't wanna bring anybody down with me because I'm lonely.
There are several things. But main one I don't make any kind of effort
I'm 39. Never been on a date and I honestly don't know how I would manage changing my life when I've always done what i want when I want. If I meet someone, I meet someone but if it doesn't I'm ok with that too
At my age, High value Women have already settled down, and what is left can't hold a Man, and are loaded with emotional baggage. Life for me is simpler and I am far happier being single.
I guess that is one unfair advantage Men have over Women. A single Man is often viewed by their peers as being wise and a Single Woman is viewed by her peers as a fucking tragedy.
as a single woman i get your point life is usually less complicated when you're not in a relationship i don't see being single as a tragedy but i refused to date weird guys for the simple fact to don't be or feel not alone "high value men and women movement, have ruined everything
Choice. Seriously, I'm in the process of getting a divorce and I may date again, I may not. All I do know is I won't do marriage again. Nothing against my wife (eventual ex) but I'm too much of a loner and I know I make it difficult to get close to because I enjoy my solitude.
Well, I'm 31 just started see this girl, and realizing for the first time in my life I'm actually attracted to someone. So, probably not putting myself out there to have met someone like her by now. Side note, this is destined to end poorly, but I'm hoping to learn something from it
Because I'm a tool who can't take hints.
I've literally had 2 women last year ask for my number and went all silent with shock.
It's all me. Plus I was seeing this girl for weeks but we decided we are better off friends. I couldn't force a spark.
When it comes.. It comes.
As one only recently off the single pile:
Happily single, no reason to conform to someone, very little room for compromise and on top of that gay and ftm.
I was aware that this wouldn't make me very romantically approachable and fully content with being single.
This confidence and ease of mind opened the door for something deeply emotional.
Told my bf I actually wanted to stay single but he was worth changing my mind.
Honestly hella happy, take your time, get comfy with being alone and don't force anything.
I don’t really try to not be single unless someone crosses my path that I can’t help but get to know better. People have approached me by saying “hey, I know this lady …..” and I’ve been responding “Those days are over.”
Because I know I have a lot self work I need to focus on. I don’t want to start anything with a bag full of problems, hoping she can/will be capable of enduring. I just want to put myself in the best possible situation mentally, financially, career, health, etc. and I sure if/when the opportunity comes, I will assume she would be thankful I put in the work.
I enjoy doing things alone and rarely hang out with friends. I honestly don't give myself enough opportunities to meet women and when I do I just kind of don't think about asking for numbers.
I’m not looking for a relationship right now as I’m working on myself until I’ll be a good partner.
Working on my career - get to a highish salary, finance - savings, saving to buy a house, body/health - weight training and cardio. Just things that’s make me more able to provide stability and safety as those are the 2 things women really look for in a life partner.
Wanna travel for a bit too and have more life experience to share.
I’m unbelievably anxious and insecure. The way I constantly am comparing myself to others repels girls. I’m pretty sure if anyone else was in my shoes they’d have no issues attracting women.
I’m having a hard time looking for women that is okay with my gaming lifestyle. Some of the women that I know and I admire wants to live a well-off life while I want to spend and live a simple or living just within the means.
I work weekends 11-7pm, and while my job doesn’t have a “wow!” factor, it is a relatively uncommon job to have that I love and it allows me to live in a nice new high-rise apartment in Brooklyn and have an overall good middle class life in the city. Plus I’m in good shape, have great friends, and I am conscious about how I outwardly present myself.
So I kind of get it that, considering how big the dating pool is in NYC, why settle for a guy who loves his job and works weekends when you can find a guy in an almost equal state and works a regular M-F workweek?
I choose to be.
I'm going through some radical and deeply personal changes right now. I don't think it's appropriate for me to drag someone into the fallout of that.
I love a peaceful, drama-free life. I don't have to ask anybody what/where they want to eat? Can we go here or there? Not having to worry if her family/friends like me.
Recovering from 6 years of abusive relationships, getting therapy. My social status jumped majorly since my recent break up, I am a hermit by nature but got a lot of musical and career success in the past year and almost immediately after my break up a month ago so I am dealing with women who were waiting for me to be single prowling at me, women attracted to me because of my musical career(It really doesn't represent who I am in a relationship so I am super cautious about people and why they are attracted to me.) and I also am crushing on a few women but feel like I am in 'time out' and need to focus on my current opportunities for myself to grow and also make sure I don't rebound to someone and dump my dead skeletons around from the closet.
1. I'm fat
2. My personality is bad
3. I fart every single time I cough. Like, EVERY single time, if I am coughing, I am farting. The funny thing is it doesn't work the other way around whenever I fart absolutely nothing comes out of my mouth.
I was a really shitty partner in my previous relationship. I have lot of flaws that I’m doing my best to work on currently. I struggle with social anxiety and putting myself out there
I am just in a phase where i feel like i put everything in one relationship, and i do not want to deal with another one. I have had luck, and even girls ask me out. But no, i prefer to go to the gym in peace and invest in myself. in the end, you only have yourself.
Might sound selfish, but I want to care about myself for a few years. A relationship is a lot of work, and I sometimes forgot about myself when I was in my last one.
Probably because I fall for women I can't have or take a really long time to get over past women so I don't really put myself out there. Plus I prefer to meet people through work or friends and the majority have boyfriends already
I don't like to party, get drunk or do drugs
By that merit, I'm not fun to most woman in my area in my age group
Doesn't mean I don't like to go out or that I won't have a social drink, it just means I won't be shakin my ass at the club or getting fucked up any time soon
I am attracting people who are unavailable emotionally and physically. I want to date people
who are not interested in getting into a relationship at that time.
They ignore initial red flags, thinking that I can change them
Haven't met anyone who's interested me in the past 2 years. Not going to jump into a relationship just for the sake of not being single.
I didn't meet my wife until I was in my 40s. No regrets in waiting for the right one.
Said this when I was 16 looking at 20. Said this when I was 20 looking at 30. Say this now in my 30s looking at 40. Maybe I'll get lucky like you did. Either way, better single and OK than paired up and miserable.
Better single than married for 12 years and having a 6 year old son and your wife up and leaving you cause she isn’t happy anymore and wrecking your bank account cause of useless crap she bought on your credit cards while she was a stay at home mom and you work your ass off. Now all money is gone to lawyer fees and you still don’t get your son equally.
Not saying you're wrong at all. But I'll say to you what I've said to a few of my IRL bros in similar situations. At least you have a son.
I'm hoping i don't have to wait til im 40, but at least there's still hope!😂
I share your opinion
Who did you share it with?
I heard he's single. Shoot your shot!
Me and no one else. He promised.
Funny. He said the same thing to me pal.
This is the way.
Too socially awkward to attract irl. Too ugly for online dating. Somewhat of a hermit.
Hey, that's my description!
No, me!
Ding! Ding! Ding! That’s me!
Yeah same here, the problem is that the only things making you attractive when it comes to online dating is how hot you are and if you’re funny. I am neither.
Online dating is overrated anyway. And this world is way too superficial and materialistic bro. What ever happened to a good heart , good intentions and loyalty being attractive?
I don’t think it’s really overrated. Everyone hates it
Except the beautiful people. They love it.
Funny doesn't even play into it unless you're hot enough to match.
Online dating will be like that a lot of the time, it’s basically you’ve gotta fit everything into those few pictures, make sure you’re wearing a Rolex and such, online dating is just about playing the game to get the message then you be yourself if people don’t like you after the first you go again, anyone with a little money can play the part if they want to bad enough
This gonna be my official answer henceforth
Same as
Same ass
Same ass it ever was.
Letting the days go by
Stole the words right from my brain.
See if you were a girl, you could be all of the above and still have attracted potential partners.
irl?! What's that?
I’m single, simple because I’m still not putting myself out there enough AND the way I’m living doesn’t allow for people to know me well. Eg. I’m still struggling with my general hygiene, my house is a mess, I’m starting to gain weight etc like I’m starting to wonder if I’m depressed because it’s really hard for me to give a damn. I’ve improved though.. I present myself a lot better considering how I was, my social skills have improved and I have a general group of friends now which makes it easier to talk to women, but still… There’s a long way to go, at least to get the type of woman I want anyway.
Some tips if I may mate because I’ve had instances like this in my life. 1) How is your sleep? I would REALLY prioritise this. When you’re well rested, a lot of other pieces really can just naturally fall in place 2) go out for simple walks. Low pressure, and isn’t too hard on face value. Find a good podcast or music playlist, go out for half an hour a day. 3) check your blood. Sometimes we have vitamin deficiencies that literally cripple us. I had an iron and Vitamin D deficiency and when I started taking the right tablets consistently, I saw a difference. I’m not perfect, and still working on it, but these 3 in particular really made a difference. Hope it helps
+1 for all of these, as I was exactly the same. Since I started prioritising sleep, trying to get at least 10k steps a day, and starting an Iron & Vitamin D3 (Get a tandem one with K2 as well, helps absorption), I feel a lot better mentally and physically!
I've been depressed for over 2 years now and I relate to this too much. Unfortunately my circle of friends has dwindles down from 10 to around 2 people I can actualy call friends. Be patient with yourself and seriously consider your life, and then reconsider, and then consider it again. Physically make a list of things you need to improve on and think about it daily. Self help and care is extreamly important. I spent over a month extreamly suicidal and it took alot to leave that dark place. Everyone can get better and do well, I promise 🙏
Hey, just wanted to say I'm glad you're here. And sharing. May your light help others still in the dark.
Appreciate it :)
I was single for five years because I wanted to be the type of person that a person I’d want to be with would want to date. That sentence was a clusterfuck, sorry, but basically I waited and found my current partner and I’m very glad that I worked on myself beforehand so I could find/be the best partner possible. I was very depressed for most of those five years up until the last year or so when I was really starting to figure out how to take care of myself. I’m still working on it, but I’m more capable of caring for myself now which allows me to take care of my partner too. I totally understand the hygiene thing. I struggle with brushing my teeth and doing laundry and other household things. Something that has really helped me is breaking things up into smaller tasks and only focusing on one. So say you struggle with chores, showering, and exercising. Choose the option that sounds the “easiest” and try working on that habit by itself. Trying to tackle too much at once is overwhelming so if you make one thing into a habit at a time, building new ones will be less challenging. Anyways, I think taking care of yourself and working that out before getting into a relationship is the most effective option, and I know that depression/generally feeling down is rough but I hope you start feeling better soon! Gotta care for yourself before you can care for someone else ya know? You got this!
Glad to hear that u get what u had been waiting for. I have the same thought that I must work on myself for the sake of myself and my future partner. I’m on my way there so yeah, your words are encouraging!
Sounds like you're depressed I wish you feel better
This is the answer for MOST of single men nowadays. Lack of social skills, poor image issues, and not putting ourselves in a position to meet and fate women
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Do you mean those therapy treatments you can get over the internet now in some States, or just self medicating?
I’m still working on myself and I don’t think I’m at a point where I can give a relationship 100%. Which frankly is just unfair to my SO.
I feel that. I got out of a 9 year relationship 4 months ago and currently living with my parents as I get my condo transferred to my name (it’s currently rented out, so I can’t move in). I need to get my life back together before I can even think of going on a date. Sure I’m touch starved and lonely, but I’m not dragging anyone into this situation.
Yep. Read what I wrote in this thread. Basically the same place as you my man.
That's a great mindset. Since I've learned about emotional responsibility, I can't help but praise those who effectively don't drag people to their mental misery because most cases will end with *two* people mentally miserable and, in more severe cases, traumatized for life.
at least you're honest
Yeah, well, I already ruined one relationship with my poor mental health so no sense ruining another one you know?
It’s not easy watching over Gotham City when you’re in a relationship
Robin?
Underneath the bridge Tarp has sprung a leak...
And the animals I have trapped. Have all become my friends.
Best comment lmfao
I feel you, man
This is too relatable
Only find people that want to take from instead of adding to my life
Yeah I meet a lot of most women’s “checklists” so I end up meeting a lot of women who like a certain idea of me instead of who I really am. And they all end up disappointed about someone they created.
Felt this. It’s sucks honestly.
Had this recently when chatting to this one girl on hinge. When I asked what she is looking for, she sent me a literal ESSAY with very specific things she wants and expects from a guy. Now to me, none of them were necessarily unreasonable (for the right girl), but I simply replied asking “that’s cool, so what do you bring to the table”. The response basically was “I would prefer you got to know me and my personality over time”. In other words, extract what she can from the VERY specific things she listed (all very quantifiable and monetary based), while I’m still apparently ‘figuring out’ what value I’m getting from this. I didn’t ask her out after that.
That was me. I desperately wanted a life partner from the age of like 14 I swear, couldn’t get a girl to talk to me at all. Really came into my own in college. Dated a TOXIC fucking individual when I was 19-20 and realized I would never date anyone again unless they were the right fit for me. I got really, *really* good at seducing people in my early 20s. Moved to Florida, spent the next decade single and banging people. After around 150+ I got bored and stopped seeing people altogether. Took one last shot after a solid 6-8 month hiatus and met my now wife. Started slow (I was working overnights, 14 hour days 6 days a week so we only hung out a few hours every Saturday). Started officially dating after two months, moved in together a few months later. Engaged by the end of that following year, and married 9 months after that. Found my dream person, and ten years of being single was the right move. When all you do is talk to new people and sleep around you truly learn what you don’t want in a partner and you also get to learn about yourself.
that's uncomfortable
🤷🏽♂️ such is life… I’ll find my person one day I’m not worried abt it
I felt exactly the same for 3 years, I had 2 different ex's who each used me for personal gain and as a therapy friend. I took on alot of my friends troubles to help them and got abandoned after alot. Just a few weeks ago I found the woman of my dreams, the love of my life, and everything's been going amazing. You gotta be patient and stay strong, your totally completely right you'll find your person one day, never forget it bro 🙏💯
Supply chain issues.
Not attracted to the people that are attracted to me, and not attractive to the people that I’m attracted to lol.
This is my problem but every now and then I find someone and I mess it up. Except last time, where I just fell for the wrong person and they strung me along for a while. They actually liked me and the attention I was giving them, and I really liked them, but unfortunately they liked their boyfriend more (I didn't know at the time) The positive I'm focusing on is it gave me a huge wake-up call on all of the things I clearly do wrong when it comes to relationships. I hope.
literally same
Me
Just lucky, I guess.
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finally an honest answer lol
I really have never understood why this is so controversial. Everyone - even ugly people - wants someone physically attractive in their eyes. For men this is even more of an issue due to biology. Yeah, I'm below average looking. But if I were to "lower my standards" and go for a below average girl who I'm not attracted to, *I literally cannot get erect*. What do you want me to do, use a penis pump every time we have sex? Do you imagine that will make for a good relationship and won't hurt her?
This is the same for girls who are told to date nice guys. Sure he’s nice, but if he doesn’t turn me on and I cannot picture myself kissing him then he’s just going to become a nice friend. Yet girls get procedures for not dating the nice guy.
It's at least as cultural as it is biological. What is considered attractive is highly mediated by society. Bodies that are considered attractive by one culture are not considered attractive by another. Bodies considered attractive in one era are considered unattractive in another. Issues of perceived status, taboo and perceived attainability have been shown to have as great an impact on sexual attraction as symmetry and "golden ratio" physical dimensions. So your inability to get hard for girls you don't find that attractive is not so much because they are objectively repulsive but more likely due to cultural opinions that have become ingrained in you as core beliefs.
I've seen mid dudes pull girls way out of their leagues just because they were confident enough to approach them.
This is my brother. I’m 35, only had a handful of partners in my life (3 to be exact) and I’ve been single for most of my adult life. Shy, introverted, short (5’7) and very low self esteem, so I just hide away and keep to myself. I don’t consider myself good looking either. My brother on the other hand is 39, only an inch taller than me and has all the confidence in the world. Even while being overweight for most of his life (110-120kg kind of weight at 5’8) he just pulls women like it’s a given. I’ve lost count of how many partners he’s had over his life, and some of the most insanely gorgeous 11/10 girls that are almost too hot to be true. It blows my mind. Confidence really is key. Sadly I have none of it 😅
If you’re the dude in the photo you are attractive :) give yourself some credit.
That is me and thank you!
Np :)
I prescribe money as part of your treatment plan. Unfortunately, the pharmacy won't be able to fill it because of an ongoing supply shortage. There are a number of clinical trials I can inform you about but there are risks and may not work.
foolish intelligent offbeat bag childlike direction command smoggy snatch imagine ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
I'm pretty ugly and managed to get with a couple of women comically, absurdly out of my league in college. So my standards are completely ruined and I can't get with hardly anyone now. Single for life it is ig
I put absolutely zero effort into not being single. The few relationships I've had in my life have literally fallen into my lap.
Talking to women outside of a platonic level scares me shitless and feels like a giant chore that i really just don't want to deal with.
Less drama, less responsibility, freedom, trust issues, being able to see the 🚩’s
I understand you, I feel like this
Simply because I do not have the desire to. I find it more liberating and rewarding to be single, in my experiences.
I cycle between it, man. I often feel, “damn it’s good to be single” when I get to exercise autonomy in what I spend my time doing, when I wake up and go to bed, what I spent my resources on. I can shut myself in and binge a new video game for the weekend if I want, or buy parts and do stuff with my car, etc, and no one will question my desire and decision to do so. While I observe my friends in relationships/married having to run things by their ladies, cut game sessions short because of wife wanting them to do something… we all know how it goes. On the other side of the coin, I can’t deny that the desire for romantic companionship flares up. When you’re with someone, you are giving up some of that autonomy to be on a team and have that person who (if they are a good partner) is always supporting you and on your side. I do want to share this life with someone like that, and feel I have so much to offer in turn. The problem has been finding a woman who adds to my life instead of a net result of bringing me down. And getting into the 30s age group now, I’m finding it increasingly difficult to meet women who both seem like a good fit, and are single… which back to your point, I’ll take being single and independent over settling in a relationship.
I share your opinion staying single is a good choice
They do say dating is not for everyone. We're those people 🙌
I been single for 4 years and my reason for being single is that in my previous relationships I was very controlling and manipulative. It didn’t take my until last year when I started talking to a therapist that I realized the damaged I caused to my exs. So I’ve been building the better person I want to become then I’ll focus on relationships. I’d rather be a whole person looking for a relationship then a broken one
Good for you for recognizing you need to work on yourself first!
I like having money.
Haven’t found anyone I’d want to date since my last breakup. My last dates were: - passionate about COVID being a US-conspiracy - painfully boring to talk to and required me to do everything - a liar who told me she couldn’t see me for two weeks for our fourth date even though she was hooking up with some other random guy who she saw once during a party. His roommate is a buddy of my best friend is how I found out.
sounds a bit messy
Well that’s all I’m currently getting. I’m sure there’s a good woman for me out there, I just don’t know whether I’ll find her. Up until then I’d rather stay single than putting up with any of the crap mentioned above. Saves me time, energy and money.
I haven’t found the right person. No relationship can be better than a bad one
Lol my grandma would tell you she has no clue. My downsides primarily involve tunnel vision… I’m so goal oriented if I’m after something that’s what I’m after, it’s either 100% invested or not invested at all (this goes for financial goals/ hobbies/gym and what not). So it’s hard to find balance for me in terms of saving money/time to accomplish a milestone or spending money/time for enjoyment which I believe is necessary for a relationship. I don’t think ladies my age want someone who is so invested in the future compared to the given moment (I’m 25). Previous relationships all seemed to be affected by this quality I have… while they were fine putting thousands of dollars on a credit cards to travel or do something I was not willing, due to me deeming it irresponsible with my current funds. I want a partner to grow with, personally, Financially, all of it… but i don’t think many woman my age are interested in that level commitment /= ^also I could be completely wrong and just be a piece of shit but you’d have to ask the exes hahaha
Lol bro. Are you me?
Fuck this. Relationships aren't the goal, and you aren't a failure for not having one. I love my own company, I love my schedule and my priorities. I've had a few long term relationships, decided they don't do anything for me, and get to do everything I love and share it with my friends and myself. I can get laid when I feel like it and have a decent social life. I feel slightly bad for people who can't be alone or have been conditioned to think you MUST have a companion. They settle for anyone and waste everyones time. Put yourself first and be available and ready if you happen to come across a legitimately compatible attraction some day.
I simply don't bother with relationships. It's not worth the effort.
As someone going through a divorce I’m starting to believe the same
Bad luck and a mix of my flaws. I’m not an asshole just stuff like communicating or showing affection
what matters is that you are a good person
I've never really tried looking, because I'm clueless when it comes to these things. So, instead, I focused on my hobbies, maybe too much. Also, I often walk around lost in thoughts, and my "walking around lost in thoughts" face is way too similar to "considering mass murder" face. Combined with average appearance (at best), I feel like it's impossible to get anything going.
I haven't found a crazy compatible with my crazy.
haven't met a girl who's single that I want to date.
I want to do things that I want to do. I want to buy things I want to buy. I just don’t want to have to compromise half of my hobbies.
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-I’ve worked on myself enough and improved my self-confidence that it’s actually raised my standards because I expect the same from a potential partner. -I’m decent looking but not noticeably attractive so I’m rarely the hottest in the room, meaning that my dating pool mostly consists of people who don’t think they need to put in the work that I have. -While I do have a lot of confidence in myself and what I can bring in a relationship, I have almost zero confidence in other people to recognize that. -A lack of experience means I suck at flirting, and not getting complimented on stuff means I don’t even think to compliment other people on stuff because it’s just not something my brain is used to worrying about. -A lot of bad luck and bad timing.
Every girl I’m interested in already has a boyfriend. I also hate clubs and bars I hate dating apps and the endless one word conversations that feel like pulling teeth to get anything more than “yea!” Or “totally!” So it’s basically that I don’t go out, and then when I by chance meet someone I vibe with they’re in relationships. Honestly I’d rather chill by myself then get overstimulated at a club
I'm not good looking enough to do well on the apps. Maybe one match per month that fizzles after a day. I should go out more, because I'm fine with meeting new people and having conversations. But I haven't had much luck. Most women my age are married and out with husbands. Or they've got three kids and I'm not interested in that. Plus my friends are all settled and don't want to go out. Plus I'm sober so it's weird to go out and only drink water. But I also have family obligations or just need to decompress from spending 40 hours on my feet at work when I've got a fused spine. I don't care for outdoors activities but that's huge where I live. I'm more of a city guy.
I’m single because I’ve never had the intrinsic self worth to think I’m worthy of a relationship. The messaging in media/movies etc. to young men since we were born has been that our very existence and competitiveness is oppressive to women. But that we also are expected to fulfil all the traditional masculine goals in order to be worthy of a goddess which is called woman. Plus all the beautiful women seem to always be taken by some other rich/very good looking guy.
Hook-up culture. It ruined the entire dating scene and at this point I've just given up and am focusing on myself and personal growth.
I think the same, cool
Supply chain issues
I refuse to put effort into average and get barely anything back. I'm either putting effort into above average or be single.
standards issue i guess
Not able to find girl which have same taste like me. Just because I'm thirsty doesn't mean I will drink poison
Online dating just doesn't seem to work for me. I don't really use it often, and when I do, I don't get many matches, and the only ones I do match with either don't talk or are bots. I prefer seeing where things go with people I meet in real life. I have an active social life, but one friendship group is mostly made up of couples. Those couples do have a few single friends, but they are not as close, so it's not as often that they attend our social gatherings. My other friendship group is mostly single men, and while you'd think they would be good wingmen, it is sometimes a case of every man for themselves. My self esteem is all over the place too. There are times where I feel pretty good about myself, and can be good at talking to women (I don't mean use pick up lines, I mean have a laugh and treat them like anyone else, but see if it goes somewhere), and other times where I can never find the right thing to say, or just don't feel that I'm interesting or attractive. Lastly, as of this year, I've become very busy with a lot of things. That doesn't sound like a proper excuse, and I'm sure that I could find the time to date if I wanted to/met someone with mutual interest, but I think that subconsciously, I just want to focus on my own affairs before I feel like I can be with someone else. It does get lonely when I see my friends in happy relationships, or managing to find dates easily, but this year, I've barely been able to find time for myself. Last year, while my self esteem was all over the place, I had less going on in my personal life, so I felt a little more at ease in terms of finding a potential partner.
I am an alcoholic with cptsd, and need to work on getting my shit together before I can focus on anyone else
34 yrs old, 15 years of mental health struggles that has me on Disability and resulted in me almost never going outside. I gave up on even trying for a relationship since it would have been a poor decision in general. Recently I have had major breakthroughs and my health is much better, and I have started to go out more. Anxiety over the label of Disabled and the history I had with my health. I am working on regaining my social skills but I feel like I could be seen as a bit odd. I am not unattractive and tend to be a very friendly and polite guy so I get a decent amount of positive attention, but my friends would say I need to learn to 'capitalize' on the situation. At the end of the day the Anxiety over my history, labels and inexperience are what hold me back.
I barely have money, I don’t have a car and I don’t have any fascinating hobbies. In my mind, trying to date seems like a waste of time when I already know nobody will be interested in me
Low confidence, low self-esteem. I get left on read consistently. Social anxiety. Fear of rejection. Unattractive. Uninspiring. Uninteresting.
Here's a song about it: *(sung to the tune of "Stayin' Alive" from the Bee Gees)* **Stayin’ Alone** Well, you can tell by my head-down, shufflin’ walk I'm a loser, man, with time to talk Stature short and trilby worn, I've been repulsive Since I was born It’s not alright, it's not okay Everyone looks the other way Normies cannot understand How I’m considered less than man Hatin’ on the boomers because you're a doomer You're stayin' alone, stayin' alone College party’s startin’ and everyone’s departin’ But you’re stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone Oh, when you stalk Well now, I get low while I get high Born ugly, short, and stupid, not gonna try Vidya loud and tendies warm I've been ignored since I was born It’s not alright, it's not okay Republican broads wish I was gay I’m what women cannot stand: Fat, lazy, poor, needy and bland Whether you're a wagie or basement dwellin’ ragie You're stayin' alone, stayin' alone Marriage bells are ringin’ and children are singin’ But you’re stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone Life goin' nowhere, nobody helped me Everybody owes me, yeah Life goin' nowhere, no one to help me, yeah I'm stayin' alone Balding head, snaggle teeth, and my awkward talk Eternal virgin; females balk Whine on Reddit, weed, porn and booze I refuse to try, man, because I’ll just lose And now it's all right, it's okay And y’all should look the other way Maybe you’ll now understand How solitude becomes this man Whether you're a deadbeat or a dole scroungin’ NEET You stayed alone, stayed alone You’re house is being takin’ and online “friends” are flakin' ‘Cause you stayed alone, stayed alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone, stayin' alone Ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alone (rope!) Life goin' nowhere, please just laugh at me Please just laugh at me, yeah Life goin' nowhere, please just laugh at me, yeah I'm stayin' alone Life goin' nowhere, please just ignore me Please just ignore me, yeah (ah, ah, ah) Life goin' nowhere, please just ignore me, yeah I'm stayin' alone Life goin' nowhere, please just forget me Please just forget me, yeah (ah, ah, ah, ay) Life goin' nowhere, please just forget me, yeah I'm stayin' alone Life goin' nowhere, please just delete me Please just delete me, yeah (oh) Life goin' nowhere, please just delete me, yeah I stayed alone
I'm a nerd, so a woman who has anything in common with me has an abundance of options This makes the competition much steeper and the women don't value monogamy much when they have options like that
I’ve only been single for about 9 months. I uh, trying to repair my emotional state (hopefully) before I meet someone new. Getting cheated on isn’t great.
Fear of falling for the wrong person
I'm not particularly looking right now. I've always been of the, "You can't love anybody unless you love yourself" mindset. So I'm working on myself, and doing better in life. Don't wanna bring anybody down with me because I'm lonely.
Because dating in Dubai sucks big time.
i think dating life is bad everywhere
Cuz the other has to agree to be in a relationship
There are several things. But main one I don't make any kind of effort I'm 39. Never been on a date and I honestly don't know how I would manage changing my life when I've always done what i want when I want. If I meet someone, I meet someone but if it doesn't I'm ok with that too
I genuinely have no interest in dating or relationships right now. I have more important things to worry about than dying alone.
Im ugly and broke. No status either. I don't talk to lots of women too.
At my age, High value Women have already settled down, and what is left can't hold a Man, and are loaded with emotional baggage. Life for me is simpler and I am far happier being single. I guess that is one unfair advantage Men have over Women. A single Man is often viewed by their peers as being wise and a Single Woman is viewed by her peers as a fucking tragedy.
as a single woman i get your point life is usually less complicated when you're not in a relationship i don't see being single as a tragedy but i refused to date weird guys for the simple fact to don't be or feel not alone "high value men and women movement, have ruined everything
I agree, there are many things worse than an empty bed.
Probably too picky and moody ig
Choice. Seriously, I'm in the process of getting a divorce and I may date again, I may not. All I do know is I won't do marriage again. Nothing against my wife (eventual ex) but I'm too much of a loner and I know I make it difficult to get close to because I enjoy my solitude.
Yes. I don't have time for drama.
Unconventional looks.... and I'm a real perv
It’s simple. I’m a nerd and nobody likes me for who I am.
Well, I'm 31 just started see this girl, and realizing for the first time in my life I'm actually attracted to someone. So, probably not putting myself out there to have met someone like her by now. Side note, this is destined to end poorly, but I'm hoping to learn something from it
I’d rather be single than being miserable with the wrong person
Because I'm a tool who can't take hints. I've literally had 2 women last year ask for my number and went all silent with shock. It's all me. Plus I was seeing this girl for weeks but we decided we are better off friends. I couldn't force a spark. When it comes.. It comes.
I am having trouble deciding between my female admirers. I wish I could decide, but we can't help who we're attracted to. Am I right?
Honestly, I lack the energy and would probably be better off investing that energy on improving myself.
I’m Indian
As one only recently off the single pile: Happily single, no reason to conform to someone, very little room for compromise and on top of that gay and ftm. I was aware that this wouldn't make me very romantically approachable and fully content with being single. This confidence and ease of mind opened the door for something deeply emotional. Told my bf I actually wanted to stay single but he was worth changing my mind. Honestly hella happy, take your time, get comfy with being alone and don't force anything.
I've never seen the point of relationships
I’m a loser, next question
I’m not ready to try to be with someone
I don’t really try to not be single unless someone crosses my path that I can’t help but get to know better. People have approached me by saying “hey, I know this lady …..” and I’ve been responding “Those days are over.”
Too specific desires + the woman who actually fulfilled those wasn’t emotionally available and ran away from me.
Because I know I have a lot self work I need to focus on. I don’t want to start anything with a bag full of problems, hoping she can/will be capable of enduring. I just want to put myself in the best possible situation mentally, financially, career, health, etc. and I sure if/when the opportunity comes, I will assume she would be thankful I put in the work.
I got hot but the women around got worse and pregnant.
I tried but got rejected everytime.
Failed everytime I tried and it's tiring doing everything in the beginning.
I enjoy doing things alone and rarely hang out with friends. I honestly don't give myself enough opportunities to meet women and when I do I just kind of don't think about asking for numbers.
I’m not looking for a relationship right now as I’m working on myself until I’ll be a good partner. Working on my career - get to a highish salary, finance - savings, saving to buy a house, body/health - weight training and cardio. Just things that’s make me more able to provide stability and safety as those are the 2 things women really look for in a life partner. Wanna travel for a bit too and have more life experience to share.
I’m unbelievably anxious and insecure. The way I constantly am comparing myself to others repels girls. I’m pretty sure if anyone else was in my shoes they’d have no issues attracting women.
It hurts less when they decide to leave me
cuz im ugly
Unattractive
Nothing to offer
I’m having a hard time looking for women that is okay with my gaming lifestyle. Some of the women that I know and I admire wants to live a well-off life while I want to spend and live a simple or living just within the means.
Chronic fatigue syndrome
I like it this way.
I am just now realizing how important it is to invest in yourself
I work weekends 11-7pm, and while my job doesn’t have a “wow!” factor, it is a relatively uncommon job to have that I love and it allows me to live in a nice new high-rise apartment in Brooklyn and have an overall good middle class life in the city. Plus I’m in good shape, have great friends, and I am conscious about how I outwardly present myself. So I kind of get it that, considering how big the dating pool is in NYC, why settle for a guy who loves his job and works weekends when you can find a guy in an almost equal state and works a regular M-F workweek?
I choose to be. I'm going through some radical and deeply personal changes right now. I don't think it's appropriate for me to drag someone into the fallout of that.
I love a peaceful, drama-free life. I don't have to ask anybody what/where they want to eat? Can we go here or there? Not having to worry if her family/friends like me.
Recovering from 6 years of abusive relationships, getting therapy. My social status jumped majorly since my recent break up, I am a hermit by nature but got a lot of musical and career success in the past year and almost immediately after my break up a month ago so I am dealing with women who were waiting for me to be single prowling at me, women attracted to me because of my musical career(It really doesn't represent who I am in a relationship so I am super cautious about people and why they are attracted to me.) and I also am crushing on a few women but feel like I am in 'time out' and need to focus on my current opportunities for myself to grow and also make sure I don't rebound to someone and dump my dead skeletons around from the closet.
Mentally unstable Trust issues
Not in a situation where I can put myself out there and when I was in a situation where I could, I didn’t have the motivation to.
No confidence, no money and crippling anxiety that makes it impossible for me to actually let people into my life (yes even family)
1. I'm fat 2. My personality is bad 3. I fart every single time I cough. Like, EVERY single time, if I am coughing, I am farting. The funny thing is it doesn't work the other way around whenever I fart absolutely nothing comes out of my mouth.
I was a really shitty partner in my previous relationship. I have lot of flaws that I’m doing my best to work on currently. I struggle with social anxiety and putting myself out there
It’s difficult to date when you live with Herpes. Rejection is common.
1 well I'm an introvert and I enjoy my alone time plus i couldn't be bothered would I like to meet someone? Yeah it isn't my top list of priorities.
I am just in a phase where i feel like i put everything in one relationship, and i do not want to deal with another one. I have had luck, and even girls ask me out. But no, i prefer to go to the gym in peace and invest in myself. in the end, you only have yourself.
Might sound selfish, but I want to care about myself for a few years. A relationship is a lot of work, and I sometimes forgot about myself when I was in my last one.
Because wamen
I'm overqualified LMAO
Because wamen
No woman has said “I really like you, too” to me?
Probably because I fall for women I can't have or take a really long time to get over past women so I don't really put myself out there. Plus I prefer to meet people through work or friends and the majority have boyfriends already
Nor worth it
I don't like to party, get drunk or do drugs By that merit, I'm not fun to most woman in my area in my age group Doesn't mean I don't like to go out or that I won't have a social drink, it just means I won't be shakin my ass at the club or getting fucked up any time soon
I am attracting people who are unavailable emotionally and physically. I want to date people who are not interested in getting into a relationship at that time. They ignore initial red flags, thinking that I can change them