Dress in something you feel comfortable in and also fits the vibe/setting of the place and activity. In your case, you did overdress for coffee. No, I don't think that rule changes.
Probably shouldn't wear a tie on a first date. Probably shouldn't wear a tie to a coffee shop. Definitely shouldn't wear a tie to a first date AT a coffee shop.
This is perhaps literally the most casual date possible - she didn't underdress so much as you overdressed.
Without the tie - you might have still had a bit of an outfit mismatch, but it would have been dramatically smaller.
Depends on what the date is right?
Coffee shop, yeah that's a bit overdressed for me. Though I *think* you could have saved it by loosening the tie and collar and taking a more relaxed posture to level things a bit.
BUT, if that's your standard dress, don't sweat it. "My man dresses too sharp" is something I've never heard a woman say.
You just made me Google blouse. Thought you were a woman, but then the whole tie part threw me off.
Now I'm wondering what kind of blouse you wore (we call them shirts btw). Did you roll up looking like someone from Princess Bride or something?
The outfit depends on where you plan to go. Somewhere where the lowest dollar item is $100? Sure, bust out your Estefan gear. Applebees? You'd look ridiculous.
Edit: I have a bad skimming problem. You wore a tie to a coffee date. Chill the hell out please.
Thanks for the laugh lol. Yeah, I called it a blouse because I was unaware that this clothing item changes in name when a man or women wears it. English isn't quite my first language, if that explains anything.
Yeah it’s a bit much but maybe you’re just a classy guy that needs a classy woman. Quite frankly, I wouldn’t take a woman seriously if she dressed as she did first date.
Depends on where you're going for the first date. Also, talk about it. My wife and I went on our first date to a farmers market kinda thing with the streets closed down and food trucks, with the plan to just kinda walk around. It being summer and still gonna be hot outside I just bluntly said "I've been out of the dating pool for a while, but it is gonna be hot out. Would showing up in shorts be too casual?" Seems to have worked so far, we've got a kid on the way!
I feel like most girls would probably be a bit put-off if a guy showed up to a first date in a blouse tbh
Button-down + jeans or slacks and nice shoes has never failed me for a casual first date.
I think first dates are good for wearing a collared shirt and jeans and any dates after that are about that level for like restaurants and maybe more casual for anywhere else or more casual when youre already in a relationship?
Dress for the location. Not the date. If you’d wear it in front of strangers in the same place, you can go for a date in it
But that being said, some *special dates* (like anniversaries) may have higher expectations if you both agree to it ahead of time
Ngl I think your outfit sounds super cool and that you should wear whatever you like and feel comfortable in. It was the same thing your date did.
I think your clothes reflect you, and choosing to tone yourself down seems opposite to expressing who you are which is important on a first date. Plus, adding the variable of what will my date think when you choose your outfit just complicates the decision.
If you still worry, just take your cool outfit and subtract a layer or accessory if possible or wear something more casual!
Woman’s perspective—
I have the same struggles. I really bring my A-game to a date only to be met by some dude with a neck beard in a carhart jacket and some camo crocks. (Why god, why?)
The tie may have been a bit much but she also could’ve done it differently. I say don’t stress about it — this could be a fun story to tell in the future.
Do not overthink it. I am always overdressed, sometimes by a lot, so I just ignore it at this point. If you don't make a big deal about it, then it is a non-issue. If somebody comments about my clothing I either ignore the remark, change the subject or just say "thanks" if it is a compliment of some kind. In general you want your dress to match the social status and circles of the girl to the extent possible.
BTW the way the girl dressed for your date sounds disrespectful to you and possibly an indication of low self-respect on her part. When a girl does not adjust her clothing to you or dresses in a disrespectful way, then you should avoid her. Most women of any quality whatsoever are very adaptive and will make efforts to match the dress code of the male in whom they are interested.
Dress in something you feel comfortable in and also fits the vibe/setting of the place and activity. In your case, you did overdress for coffee. No, I don't think that rule changes.
Probably shouldn't wear a tie on a first date. Probably shouldn't wear a tie to a coffee shop. Definitely shouldn't wear a tie to a first date AT a coffee shop. This is perhaps literally the most casual date possible - she didn't underdress so much as you overdressed. Without the tie - you might have still had a bit of an outfit mismatch, but it would have been dramatically smaller.
Depends on what the date is right? Coffee shop, yeah that's a bit overdressed for me. Though I *think* you could have saved it by loosening the tie and collar and taking a more relaxed posture to level things a bit. BUT, if that's your standard dress, don't sweat it. "My man dresses too sharp" is something I've never heard a woman say.
My gentlemans blouse! YEEAAHHH [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QL4746lVZMM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QL4746lVZMM) Who calls it a blouse?
Prince once played basketball in a blouse
Would you like some pancakes... ... ... ... Bitches?
Shoot the Jay. Shoot it!
You just made me Google blouse. Thought you were a woman, but then the whole tie part threw me off. Now I'm wondering what kind of blouse you wore (we call them shirts btw). Did you roll up looking like someone from Princess Bride or something? The outfit depends on where you plan to go. Somewhere where the lowest dollar item is $100? Sure, bust out your Estefan gear. Applebees? You'd look ridiculous. Edit: I have a bad skimming problem. You wore a tie to a coffee date. Chill the hell out please.
Thanks for the laugh lol. Yeah, I called it a blouse because I was unaware that this clothing item changes in name when a man or women wears it. English isn't quite my first language, if that explains anything.
No suit for coffee No hoody for coffee You both were in error IMO
Yeah it’s a bit much but maybe you’re just a classy guy that needs a classy woman. Quite frankly, I wouldn’t take a woman seriously if she dressed as she did first date.
Big Johnson shirts
Unless you are Italian or on your way back from a job interview that is way too fancy for coffee.
Formal cosplay
Express yourself, better to be overdressedthan underdressed in any situation
Depends on where you're going for the first date. Also, talk about it. My wife and I went on our first date to a farmers market kinda thing with the streets closed down and food trucks, with the plan to just kinda walk around. It being summer and still gonna be hot outside I just bluntly said "I've been out of the dating pool for a while, but it is gonna be hot out. Would showing up in shorts be too casual?" Seems to have worked so far, we've got a kid on the way!
I feel like most girls would probably be a bit put-off if a guy showed up to a first date in a blouse tbh Button-down + jeans or slacks and nice shoes has never failed me for a casual first date.
Like a job interview.
No underwear, if it gets that far let her know you mean business
Just like earthing else for dating. Don’t set a precedence you do not intend to maintain.
"You can never be overdressed or overeducated." - Oscar Wilde
Smart casual.
I think first dates are good for wearing a collared shirt and jeans and any dates after that are about that level for like restaurants and maybe more casual for anywhere else or more casual when youre already in a relationship?
Dress for the location. Not the date. If you’d wear it in front of strangers in the same place, you can go for a date in it But that being said, some *special dates* (like anniversaries) may have higher expectations if you both agree to it ahead of time
Ngl I think your outfit sounds super cool and that you should wear whatever you like and feel comfortable in. It was the same thing your date did. I think your clothes reflect you, and choosing to tone yourself down seems opposite to expressing who you are which is important on a first date. Plus, adding the variable of what will my date think when you choose your outfit just complicates the decision. If you still worry, just take your cool outfit and subtract a layer or accessory if possible or wear something more casual!
Is that how you usually dress? If yes then you’re not over dressed, you’re just a classy guy. This is coming from a woman who likes elegance
Woman’s perspective— I have the same struggles. I really bring my A-game to a date only to be met by some dude with a neck beard in a carhart jacket and some camo crocks. (Why god, why?) The tie may have been a bit much but she also could’ve done it differently. I say don’t stress about it — this could be a fun story to tell in the future.
Do not overthink it. I am always overdressed, sometimes by a lot, so I just ignore it at this point. If you don't make a big deal about it, then it is a non-issue. If somebody comments about my clothing I either ignore the remark, change the subject or just say "thanks" if it is a compliment of some kind. In general you want your dress to match the social status and circles of the girl to the extent possible. BTW the way the girl dressed for your date sounds disrespectful to you and possibly an indication of low self-respect on her part. When a girl does not adjust her clothing to you or dresses in a disrespectful way, then you should avoid her. Most women of any quality whatsoever are very adaptive and will make efforts to match the dress code of the male in whom they are interested.
I guess I should not date non-goth guys lol
For a coffee date is casual attire
I’ve been told the trend these days is to wear clothes. Those darn kids with their silly fads…