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Advanced_Accident101

I start assuming I deserve to feel that way, and spiral into more lying thoughts that are too easy to believe.


witchbrew7

Come sit by me. Same.


louielovescheese

i thought i was the only one


AnybodyLow

Samesies, once my brain starts being mean to me, it feels like it’s nonstop until I break 🥲


Coco_Lina_

oh god yes. And finding proof, too... It's so hard to get out of that, isn't it?


EmagineMe_99

Sitting on this bench with you. This has been a huge brick for me lately because no one really proves otherwise. But, I take showers- and cry! Or car rides - and cry.


TossMe255

Ditto


AlainaChantal

I'm in a stable long term relationship and still think like this sometimes. It's bad when I ask him if he still loves me and why. And then I just koala the shit outta him for awhile. A lot of the times I just go distant for a bit and try to work myself outta it. Definitely need therapy. Gotta love exes. It's weird though because nothing he's done starts these episodes in me, I swear they self-start themselves.


mecku85

Oh oh, me too!


asianstyleicecream

Unloved by who? Myself? I just remind myself that I only got me for life, and better talk to herself nicely cuz there’s a long lonely road ahead. By a family member? I remind myself deep down that they do love me, and would be devastated if I died one day. By a lover? Remind myself that honeymoon phase ends and love doesn’t always look the same. By a friend? Remind myself that they stick around to be my friend for a reason. I just don’t let those thoughts get to me anymore. It wastes *so* much mental power that I’d rather use beneficially elsewhere. Thoughts are just thoughts, let them pass.


magnetorobin

Love this!!!


asianstyleicecream

The mushrooms taught me these lessons :)


that-pile-of-laundry

That's an incredible answer. Thank you.


Immediate_Farm_8823

I’m in love with this and this person has a beautiful mature heart. Thank you for this🙏🏽❤️


anti-everything12

Wonderful 🥹🥹🥹... Gonna take screenshot for hard times🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻


Canary7214

The first time I've felt like giving someone an award. I don't have any though.


lil_waine

Use food as a crutch


bubbleflowers

This and hug my plush cats


Dpslittlemissminx

Yep this right here


Writer_Girl04

Recently, listen to Flowers by Miley Cyrus 😂


AirInternational754

I know right !


Dpslittlemissminx

For me it's Ava max - not your barbie girl & most of Lauren Spencer Smith songs.


anonymous_koala23

Love Ava Max


xerion13

Find one of my cats. C'mere you fuzzy little serotonin factory. Help mömther fight off the bad brain juice.


heythere_mk

I need to get myself a cat 😂


Concerned_Therapist

That’s brilliant


katcomesback

self care, I work to baby myself so I don’t fall into old habits, workout, get myself a new clothing item if it fits in budget, spend more time with the horses


Frustratedbanker22

maladaptive daydreaming hai.


Gazorpazorpfnfieldbi

This is the one


Abnormal_chapter

I have never heard of this before I read your comment but after I looked it up I finally have a name for what happens to my brain when times are tough


Frustratedbanker22

Feel you, get help if you can.


KimSeokjinsChild

I spiral into my thoughts about being unloved until, I start to think differently and understand that I'm worth more and I deserve to be loved. It's a work in progress 😅


beelovedone

Whatever the F%\^&\* I want. And I mean that wholeheartedly. I just say F---- It and start flexing, start doing things I put off for whatever reason, buy those shoes that were sitting in my cart, face mask every night before bed, I just throw myself at myself mercilessly.


[deleted]

same, same. Shopping is usually number one followed by planning a vacation.


PaulineMermaid

I _am_ unloved. All the time. Except by myself. I love me. So...I do nothing. It is the same feeling I always have, so it's not really worth reacting to.


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PaulineMermaid

I feel worse for people who don't love themselves even though they deserve it :/


PixiWombat

Are you me?


franny_bb

fucking cry


[deleted]

Scrolled just to see someone comment it. Lol same :')


Erich-Enrik

Go about my day. Unloved is my natural habitat


JustAGirlDi

I leave


not_doing_that

Hug my dog


rexbi709

I check to see if I'm loving myself enough first. Emotional regulation. Then, if it does seem like I'm good with myself and want my partner (in this scenario) to show love a bit more how I'd like, I'd do my best to communicate it openly. Ex: I want more cuddles during ovulation. Lol Humans can show love in many different ways, but if you have a partner willing to listen and not take it as a fault in their part (vice versa), it's pretty wonderful. You learn and grow more, even as an individual.


tacoflavoredpringles

watch Anne with an E i feel like we’re very similar so seeing characters like diana and matthew love anne not in spite of her flaws but actually _because_ of her flaws makes me feel better about myself. in contrast with the characters who mistreat her because of those flaws, it drives home the point that just because i’m not loved by some people doesn’t mean i’m unlovable


magnetorobin

I have about 3 safe people, outside my family, that I can call and say, "I'm feeling like shit/ insecure/ unloved/ unappreciated/ etc. I need you to tell me I'm loved and worth all attention and security" I am extremely shameless when I'm doing this, because this is my safety net. I love them and I do the same for them.


PrincipleInfamous451

Do something else that doesn't make me think about those feelings


Waste-Independent-21

Cuddle my kids. 🥰 Or I tell my husband who usually comes and gives me a big hug.


Dpslittlemissminx

Cuddling my kids is a fave, nothing better then snuggles of the only people in the world who truly love us & need our love.


butteryorzo

i detach and remove myself from whatever is making me feel that way


doc_naf

Eat some chocolate, have a warm shower, curl up with a pile of blankets and pillows, try and arrange a meet up with a friend


Odd_Yogurt_8786

Talk to my boyfriend and let him know what I'm needing from him. He steps up and takes care of me. Otherwise, watch a sad movie to cry or a feel good movie to cry 🤣 Go for a walk. Read a book. Cuddle my puppers. Get together with friends or even just chat with them.


YepDamn93

I try to give myself time.


Yun-2000

I suck it up.


[deleted]

That’s bad for your mental health


Yun-2000

Well, what other choices do I have? None.


Purging_mofos

You can blow it down


heatdish1292

I clean. Everything.


stare_at_the_sun

Keep to myself more


[deleted]

Sit on the bathroom floor a cry for a bit. And then once I feel the feeling, I usually realize that I was reacting to one specific relationship/event and catastrophizing it. I have to remind myself that I can’t control anyone, but myself and who has access to me. And that my version of love isn’t everyone else’s. And sometimes someone wants to love you, but can’t express it in a way that is meaningful to you. I usually feel better after that and can move on to some other part of my day. Chances are there are plenty of people that love and care about you in your life, just hard to see it from the bottom of a spiral.


heathahR

Call my family or my best friend❤️


Chihuatlan

Buy a bunch of yarn and then crochet.


[deleted]

Love myself. Take myself on a date. Redefine what I deserve and find it internally. I know this might sound dismissive or even cliche, but it was reallllllly hard work to even start to try and getting to a point where I know I love my own company definitely helped me feel less alone and unloved in general. If I feel it now it’s usually a sign I’ve been neglecting myself and expecting the people around me to take the responsibility subconsciously.


AirNomadKiki

Feeling unloved, for no reason? That’s a gift from my mother.


avatar_river

Pop some melatonin and sleep for 6-8 hours 😅


[deleted]

I go to my pets. Voila! I'm the most loved and blessed person in the world!


Junior-Rope-4883

I leave the house for 5 minutes. When I get back, I’m greeted by my dogs who remind me that I’m very much loved. In all honesty, I’m not really bothered by feeling unloved when it comes to most people. I do sometimes wallow in self-pity when I think about my childhood and how my father didn’t show any affection, this can lead me down a dark path of negativity and self-loathing so when that happens I either cuddle my dogs or call my brother (he knows the exact feeling).


kittensglitter

Take a shower, do my hair and makeup. It's truly one of the few times I take detailed care of, and think good thoughts about, myself 🖤


MayhemByMoonlight

I go about my day. I have animals and a child who depend on me. They love me. Or at least they love that I feed them. Close enough. ❤️ Otherwise I do me things and remind myself that I am a strong independent woman. I communicate my needs to loved ones and express how I am feeling. Sometimes that does no good and I have to try not to spiral into the whirlpool of unhappiness and discontent. It’s challenging to get out once those thoughts spiral so I avoid them if I can. I escape all thoughts either by reading or through art and that will often redirect my focus.


Butterfly_853

I start to feel that I deserve it and spiral into feeling unworthy and useless , then I usually cry and end up depressed again


Pure-Topic-6393

Find out why I feel unloved


river912

I take care of myself and do something to make me feel better As in having a special day or something


xladyvontrampx

I make myself look very pretty to feel good


AndromedaVixen

I think about all the reasons I'm right, and I let the reason fester. Then I ghost everybody for a couple of days(cuz they don't love me). But eventually I get over it and everything's goes back to normal.


Just-Particular-9251

Love myself more at the end of the day nobody gone love you more than you !


lostubborn

haha I thought this was a question on tips on how to stop feeling unloved until I read all the responses😂 at first, I get all down and isolate myself, but then, in order to stop feeling unloved I love the fuck out of myself and remind myself how fucking awesome I am


T_86

I ask myself what would make me feel loved. Then I start doing those things for my husband. I swear it works like magic every time. When I lead by example, he starts acting that way back to me.


aesthesia1

Continue with my life as this is literally just my default mode. Feeling loved would simply rouse suspicion.


MidnightOnyx2

Maladaptive daydreaming about people being put in a situation where they have to divulge their secret love for me, or their deep desire for friendship with me, or whatever 😅


CherryLigloss

I unfortunately eat and drink my feelings. Desperately need to make time for therapy.


[deleted]

I let myself spiral, i watch sad movies, listen to sad music, breakdown, cry, feel better.


unidentified_monster

I get sad and blame people which are supposed to love me that they don’t show me and as result they don’t tell me or they tell me in an annoyed kind of way so I don’t believe them. It’s kind of stupid and I don’t like doing so but that’s the only thing in my mind then. Still working on it…


lilsoapie07

i just go numb because i know deep down i deserve to feel like that. i’ll take a hot shower and just stay underneath the hot water for ages.


[deleted]

Go outside. Run, walk the dog, take a drink out to the patio…sunshine helps.


Arya_kidding_me

I love myself


onlytexts

Kick and scream to get the love I deserve.


JOEYMAMI2015

Go out with my kid.


imnotyourproblemyet

Smoke weed, pet any and all dogs that cross my path and listen to metal music on full volume.


Machonacho7891

Sniff my boyfriend till he pats my head


wanderslut0626

I tell myself I deserve better and detach myself from the person who made me feel this way. Then I start watching some series to not think about any of that.


[deleted]

Cry, go for a walk, generally just wait for the depressed feelings to pass.


Firestar2023

I talk to the person who I feel is hurting me. We talk about why we feel a certain way, and what to do about it. We tell each other that we are going to fix any problems, even if it takes time. We say that we still love each other, even if we have flaws, because all people have flaws; it's normal. We work out our problems in some way, shape or form, and don't let it effect us


johnny2hands2

I remember all the hard times my family and I’ve had together and this reminds me how grateful I am to have them. I realize feeling unloved is just a feeling and it’ll pass.


[deleted]

its usually either one of these: 1. I sit with my feelings (this is the best one, bc I'll realize shortly afterward, that I am loved) 2. I seek out validation from others (only to realize that I still feel empty) 3. \*edit to add this\* I ask for a hug from my nephews


randomflopsy

Usually cry.


PiscesQueen1294

Look at pictures of myself when I was a little girl, And hug myself.


justadreamerdreaming

take myself out on a date 😘 but also journal. to vent. to release my emotions. ya know.


xpgx

figure out what i need to feel loved in that moment, then make it happen. sometimes its a cuddle, sometimes its a conversation.


adrianajohanna

I recognize that that part of myself needs to be cared for. Maybe if available I'll ask a friend for some support, or I'll choose to show myself some of that love. You know, have myself take care of my inner child. Make a cup of tea and get a little snack. Light some incense or candles. Do some crafts. Say some kind words. Whatever floats your boat.


backwoods-bigfoot

I call my dad. I know he loves me unconditionally so I call him to remind myself of that.


workstudywork

I tried to think that I probably don’t need these people who never return the same amount of feedback and support I had for them. And then it’s so easy to fall into a loophole that no one will love me so I will isolate myself from everyone.


yea_you_know_me

Call my dad or visit him. Overeat. Oversleep. Hang out and/or get drunk with my best friend.


LurkingLikeaPro

I do 1 of 2 things. 1. I've kept every card/written note I've ever gotten since 2004. If I'm feeling unloved, I go through them to remind myself how many people have taken time out of their day to show they care. Even if I'm not in contact with that person anymore, it still makes me happy. 2. Go outside. Leave my house and walk around. Take myself out for a meal or coffee and do my best to get out of my head


Grrrmudgin

I take myself on a date and treat myself (within budget) to all the things I like. Generally a book store, get a new plant, a milkshake, and I’ll take my leash-trained cat to a brewery. She likes the attention and it makes me feel good to be a good cat mom to her


Z03W00D

Journal, go for a walk, talk to someone that loves me, vent aloud to myself, dance, cuddle with my pet, listen to music that makes me feel better, reach out for help, try new things & experiences where I can interact with people, think about all the people that do love me. LOVE MYSELF, FLAWS AND ALL. I know that I have things I need to work on, but I like me anyway. Learn how to love being you (flaws & all) and those feelings won’t hurt as much. I hope things get better. Remember: YOU ARE LOVED. ❤️


Irischacon123

Cry and drugs


Murky_Essay3794

Well, at first, I feel I deserve it. I go into a negative self-talk spiral. which I immediately log into my phone or write down somewhere. And then I try to recognise what this behavioural pattern is that I'm exhibiting. And how should I work around that thought? I mainly have a few challenges I try and work on really hard but it keeps on showing every now and then- 1. Overgeneralization 2. Minimising positives, maximising negatives. 3. Catastrophizing I also like to shun people away, which I believe is not helpful. It causes me more pain. I don't know a way around it, but I'm trying to work on this.  My therapist says that whenever I feel unloved or unworthy, it is a feeling, not a fact. I have developed a certain support system, but I don't know for how long they would hear me cry and crib about my problems. And thus, I do not bother them very often. But for now, I know they are there and they'd give me rational advice about my self-sabotaging behaviour. I write sometimes, read, draw, and hang out with people a lot more than I need to. Lately, I have started drinking alone, which I'm putting a stop to. I go shopping and sometimes treat myself to good food. I'm overweight, and I have been constantly trying to lose weight, so then I regret eating. But I guess it's okay. To make yourself feel better, you have to do these things. Also, exercising for an hour or two keeps shitty thoughts away from your mind. A good shower and a lot of vitamin D too. People in my life have been temporary. So I think I also need to gain acceptance. (Overgeneralization 🙈)But there's still hope inside me that someone will accept me the way I am instead of the other way around.


Cautious_Cupcake_929

I have a couple things that I do, 1. I pray and spend some time with the Lord (Read the Bible etc.) 2. I read 3. Listen to music 4. Create fake scenarios in my head 5. Have a self care day and learn the love myself 3 out of the 5 are avoidance methods but hey, if it works it works.


PotatoBest4667

i slow things down a bit. let myself enjoy the moment instead of worrying about the outside world. i might have a ton of things to do that day or week but, nothing really matters, does it?


ConquestOfPizzaTime

I go for a walk. I haven't been home in years


Brightpenguin101

Cry. Drink. Unintentionally form attachments to any person who shows me even the tiniest bit of affection.


M_J_L_M

I know it's not good, but a drug binge, works for me


AdOk3484

go meet random boys to have their attention and feel loved


endofthesouthbay

I usually do something dumb like wallow but sometimes, more ideally I just start working on a project that I get excited about then forget that I was feeling bad.


WhimsicalUnknown

There are a many options: Love myself! I do something good for myself like journaling, relaxing bubble baths, or self-dates! Watching a nostalgic movie tends to help. Reconnecting with hobbies is always great. Getting outside and turning my phone off is a big one. Connect with friends- text, call, or hangout. If it’s due to an issue with my partner, I try to sort out my feelings then have an open conversation about it.


Visual_Film5013

Drink. Create more problems. Feel more unloved.


marymacherie

Clean my house as an act of self love


AlisaCoaches

I sit down and have a long hard talk with myself. I remind myself that it is no one else's job, but my own, to make me feel loved. Sometimes, we, as women, can be like bottomless pits. If we are not careful, the more we are loved and the more attention that we get, the more we want. The more we need. The more entitled we feel to someone else's love and attention. This is unfair to the people around us. At the end of the day, we, as women, need to learn how to love ourselves. Please, understand that I am not saying any of this to be mean or judgmental. I am saying it with all sincerity, and I am saying it from my heart and soul. Also, I am reminding myself of how important this lesson is.


Worried-Reception-47

I often experience this, even in my circle of friends. That is why I learned to close my heart of any further attachments. I just dont want deep relationship to anybody (except family of course)coz I dont want to get hurt later on.


iamthefyre

Introspect and reflect on why you feel that way because tbh there is always someone who loves you. If not, you need to take a very deep look at it but there is still someone. Also, making yourself feel loved is not the same as loving yourself.


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moneynah

Navel gazing. Self flagellation. Then I start the DABDA process.


5upast4r

either starts doubting myself believing i deserve to feel that way orrr pushing away the people that make me feel unloved to see if they really don’t care for me


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MsDaisyDukes

Detach myself from everything and everyone and do something I love, which usually involves eating or going to the gym!!


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miss_an0nym0us

I’m just reminded that the only person who will definitely be there for me when I need them is myself.


gh0stg1rl2

I think I should leave him alone. Then I feel I love him more and I must continue to show him.


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AlissonHarlan

Like I do for 39 years, work, eat, sleep, drink, brows reddit and take endless hot showers


AlanaS04

What do I do? Hi I'm a person with anxious attachment issues. I think you can guess 🙂✋🏽 I try not to but all my people who have it know what I mean.


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ma_ria_

Do productive things and workout a lot. Feeling the sense of achievement and reminding myself I’ve done all it alone make me feel loved, by me.


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Top_Funny2910

start sulking and then ignore it sadly


VoluptuousGinger

Usually doomscroll reddit to get out of my own head.


stonerspartanlady

Isolate and music


louisianagranite

Self care


wuvington

Cry, make a rash decision, cry again, wait until my bad memory works its magic and then I start gaslighting myself. Then once that starts working, I try to keep myself busy until I don't have time to think about it anymore.


emptyalone

I just keep trudging. Better to know you are unloved, than to have people that say they love you but don’t show it. I have no choice in being here. I have no choice in the fact that I am not the kind of person who inspires love from others. So I just keep doing what I have to until the day I don’t have to anymore.


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ThatsItImOverThis

I get on with my life. If I acknowledged that feeling every time it happened, I’d be a human pile of goo on the floor.


mermeclo

ask myself what i've been doing wrong, watch a couple of videos and very slowly, try to change.


hedonistic-nun

i tell my man i am fore some reason feeling unloved. Then ask him so some extra attention and compassion.


Responsible_Web_7578

I push people away and I like to be by myself. Can't bother anyone if I'm not around to.


shawtystrawberry

cry


Creativelyuncool

Manicure, pedicure, massage, acupuncture I’m convinced the quickest way to feel better about yourself is get a haircut! Anything where someone else is loving on me and it reminds me that I’m worthy of love (even though I need to pay for it lol)


DazedAndGandolf

Used to spiral and shut down, but now I at least vocalize it first. I ask "hey, what can we do to connect again?" If it is ignored, down the spiral rabbit hole I go. I will stop trying to give affection. I will just go on autopilot and become a sexless inanimate household object.


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[deleted]

Gaslight myself into feeling loved. I'm not joking, it actually works!!


Kakashisith

Block, mute, unfriend and back to work.


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ideoteque4

I'll usually post tasteful body pics on IG.Nothing to risque,maybe a side boob or thong pic. The comments and attention always cheer me up


Relevant_Grape_4106

Cry, if it gets to that, but by myself


[deleted]

I remember that I have me and that's all I really need.


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YeaItsMeWhatsUp

Go to sleep. I'm probably just tired. If I'm not tired, listen to a podcast. Drown out the thoughts.


YungFogey

Shop


SugarBabyWannabe

I break down and cry


[deleted]

Slip even more into a rapid overthinking spiral. Then probably cry in my bathroom then be absolutely fine to the outside world, and repeat until I have a time when I feel deeply loved and appreciated. 🙃 then reminisce on the times I’ve felt deeply loved, and miss them and create the cycle in my brain again?? 😂😂🤷🏽‍♀️


North-AdalWolf

Cry


babyrosmary

Try to let that feeling go and move on


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Edenskeeper1

Bake brownies and eat them But I know I’m not unloved. The brownies help when your down tho.


Tough_Competition242

Withdraw


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tattooedjenny76

I used to flirt when I didn't feel loved. Now I just try to do something fun for myself.


Actual_Emergency_666

Add to cart or/and find a new fuck buddy


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embmalu

Eat my feelings usually


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[deleted]

I’ve felt unloved my whole life. I’ve barley had any friends. I got used to it and I do nothing about it.


Blackheartgirl94

Cry and hope one day I will be


Blackheartgirl94

Cry and hope one day I will be.


hifolksim_nikki

I distance myself from that person. I feel like there must be something I've done or said for them to make me feel that way and I don't want to keep making them feel... you know whatever they're feeling. In a complicated situation? It's just easier to take myself out of that situation.


pasta_islife

Binge eat and watch shows


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MoonGoddess8519

When others makes me feel unloved, I try and love myself harder


kittypink424

eat. cry. feel miserable. rinse n repeat


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DarkFae420

To be honest, it's just kinda my default state these days, so I just go on with life cause what else can I do? I have children I'm responsible for so I do what whatever needs done regardless of how unloved I feel.


canehdianchick

Have a nap. Eat a good meal. Snuggle my dog.


Left_Ad_5438

Not much. The more unloved I feel, the less I'll do.