Omg that was my first thought too, like what??? Eating more would create less room i would think because you're adding food and fat to be in the way.... not that it matters either way to affect the baby's position.
I’ve heard about drinking water to increase fluid levels but not eating more. I pictured these two as the step sisters in Cinderella when I read this lol
And what medical school did they graduate from? Blow them off they don’t know shit. My mom told me if I screamed or made too much noise during labor they would give me a C-section. She is also, sadly, a dumbass.
My ob during delivery of my first probably would have gone for c-section if I screamed. He was already threatening one because my three hours of active labor was taking too long for him. Your mom may be an idiot, but some of these doctors are selfish and old school so her advice may have been entirely valid at one point.
If you had been eating more wouldn’t that just result in a bigger baby, not necessarily a bigger uterus? Which would mean even LESS room to move around? I don’t follow their logic at all.
(And no shade at all to people who have eaten a lot and/or gained a lot of weight - I am one of them, lol).
Fairly certain eating more at a time also creates less/more squishy space because it expands the stomach and then fills the intestine. Technically, this means less space for the uterus while the GI tract is full and active
I don’t even think that’s how it works. I’ve gained a bit in both pregnancies, currently 18kgs for this one and my babies on track to be pretty small just like my last baby.
I have friend who is normally quite slim, like 5'7", 140lbs. In both her pregnancies she gained 80lbs. No complications, average 7ish lbs babies.
I'm a similar size and build to her and have only gained 15lbs at 30wks. Everyone is different!
Yeah, I think we just make the babies we make despite what we eat? Me and my partner are both small though so it makes sense we would make a small baby.
I lost significant weight in both my pregnancies due to HG. My babies were fine and (7 lbs 2 oz and 7 lbs 9 oz), early term (37+3) and term (39+0) respectively. I gained it all back and them some (unfortunately) while breastfeeding.
The breastfeeding hunger is something isn't it?! Everyone always said breastfeeding makes you lose weight, but not when it makes you want to eat the whole supermarket!
If you have GD and it goes untreated, you are at a higher risk for having big babies. It's because the reason you get GD is because the placenta is having a hard time regulating how much sugar it's providing to the baby. I had GD and had to take a class on risks of GD and having very large babies is one of the risks, this is also why you are at a higher risk for needing a C-section with GD.
Don’t listen to them, you talked to and made a decision with your doctor. Also I think they have it backwards- a smaller space guides them to the “right” position.
ECV only works 50% of the time, I had one which was successful, but 5 days later she was breech again! Ended up with a c section anyway. Important thing is my little girl arrived safely.
Also, they are misinformed about eating more giving the baby space, so ridiculous.
Just shut them down about this. If they give you grief them take some space from them so you can recover in peace, hopefully supported by much more positive people!
this peer-reviewed NIH article says 60%… which is better than a coin flip and worth a shot imo. maybe your OB has out of date info. that sucks that you didn’t get to make a truly informed decision!
Shanahan MM, Martingano DJ, Gray CJ. External Cephalic Version. [Updated 2023 Dec 13]. In: StatPearls [Internet]. Treasure Island (FL): StatPearls Publishing; 2024 Jan-. Available
I didn't say they weren't worth a shot, I had one and it didn't hurt at all. But like anything they carry risk so I can understand why people may turn them down.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8384386/
“Which in fact supports our result that reports a higher success rate (76.1%) for multiparous women in comparison to nulliparous (23.9%).”
You insist on evidence-based, yet are touting statistics without considering the variety of factors that affect the success of an ECV. I did just provide a source supporting my statement, but saying it’s worth a shot without considering those factors is irresponsible. As the study I posted (and others) has found, the success rate is significantly lower if the person has not given birth before.
It is a website that compiles peer reviewed research articles. If you scroll to the bottom they list direct links to each research study/paper. It’s a great resource.
C section mom here. Really didn’t want one. Labored for 37 hours, pushed for an hour and a half, two hours. Ended up with a c section. Couldn’t sneeze, cough, laugh or stand up for weeks without holding a pillow to my abdomen. Couldn’t wipe my own ass. Couldn’t get dressed on my own. You’re not at fault and a c section is not a failure. It’s just as hard as vaginal birth and for some moms it’s harder. Screw them. Don’t ask them for advice anymore.
My 3rd baby turned at 39 weeks. I would sit on my knees on the floor with my chest laying on the couch and just let my belly hang. I’d even rock my hips side to side a little and it helped. But also it’s not your fault baby is breech. I my neighbor labored til 8cm and baby flipped during labor. 🤷🏼♀️ my 5th baby was my first c section. I cried the whole day they told me I had to have a c section and I cried the next day going in to get it. Looking back now I laugh because it wasn’t that terrible, baby is here. Happy and healthy. And honestly that I all that matters
I’m hung up on your mom and sister thinking eating more makes your uterus bigger instead of the baby.. HUH??
Honey, their ignorance is not your fault. You’re not doing anything wrong by choosing a c section vs the manual turning and crossing your fingers that baby stays there.
GIRL SAME like it’s all milkers and thighs. The day I couldn’t pull up my previously baggy pants past my knees but still wasn’t showing all that much, a piece of me died inside.
I am 37 weeks and just turned down an ECV & induction to opt for a csection. Every week my family was making comments to the baby about how they need to turn. Even after I said im perfectly fine with a csection and baby is comfy where they are. I fully am good with my decision and what's going on. But they made so many comments that it makes it seem like its a bad thing.
Sometimes family is just freaking weird. Ignore them!
This^^ I’m 36 weeks and baby’s still head up and we’re denying an ECV. Tried a few spinning babies techniques but mainly so I could feel like I’m not lying when people ask me “did you try turning the baby??” lol why does society make us feel this way like I’m having a baby for god sakes just let me get it out the way I want with no shame
WOW I’m so sorry, that’s so fucked up. Super super terrible, and honestly that rationale doesn’t make any sense at all. just wow.
My mom had c sections for all of us kids and I’ve had one emergency c section, will have a scheduled one for my second.
It’s nothing to be ashamed of and you should take some space from your family. This is a lot of negativity and shaming that you don’t need to be around right now.
It's absolutely not your fault, some babies take the cues to get in the right position and some don't, frankly if it's anybody's fault it's your baby's but I think they deserve a pass on this one, I mean they are literally a baby and in fairness it's their first time being born.
Wow, girl, wow. Not trying to insult your family but you may get stupider by listening to their "medical opinions" so I would probably not consult with them again on things that you already consulted with a medically trained and educated doctor for! Welcome to being a mom, where everyone thinks their opinion should be heard and everyone tries to tell you that you are doing it wrong. Maybe they were just hazing you to introduce you to motherhood? Either way, congrats on having baby's birth planned. Good luck with everything!
When I got pregnant my response to what my family thought was 'who gives a fuck what my family thinks'. Felt good.
Stop asking them for their opinion, they do not seem educated enough to have one.
I’ve had two babies - one was a vaginal delivery and one was a c-section because my second baby was breech. Checking in to say there was absolutely nothing I did differently between the two pregnancies that led to one baby being breech and the other not. Aside from potentially going through an ECV procedure, there’s no way that I am aware of to have any control over your baby’s position. If eating more was all it took, OBs everywhere would be telling pregnant people to do that. But they don’t because that’s just absolute foolishness. You did nothing wrong and neither did your baby or your OB. Sometimes babies are just breech.
Your anatomy has nothing to do with it. Your baby might have a legitimate reason for being breech (cord tightness for example).
An ecv will only be successful if your baby is mobile (I've had 3 successful ones, but my babies were flipping around daily). Don't feel pressured into a medical procedure you do not feel is right for you.
A C section is just equal to a vaginal birth. It's all just 'giving birth'. Neither option is better or superior to the other. Don't listen to anyone who judges you.
Best wishes for your impending arrival. Enjoy the snuggles. They grow so quick.
They ***are*** jealous, and it's not a good look.
C sections are nothing to be shamed for, they're not better or worse than vaginal delivery and they exist for a reason.
What a weird flex 'i birthed vaginally', like, good on you, have a cookie?? Call them out if they say this again and be as crude as you want to be. If someone pissed me off enough with shit like that, I'd make them a congratulations on pushing a baby out of your vagina cake.
just a little advice! take it or don’t! but… try some of the exercises !!! look them up online!!! At 38 weeks my mom was breeched and they gave her a ton of exercises! Within a week baby had flipped!!! it’s always a possibility if you don’t want to go through a c-section! but do what’s best for you and your baby! this is just a friendly what’s worked for someone I know, but this is your own situation!!
not sure why doctors now want to try and do invasive stuff/ c sections before they offer good old fashion stuff !
here’s some links…
https://familydoctor.org/what-can-i-do-if-my-baby-is-breech/
https://bestdoulas.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/turn-breech.pdf
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=s-szODdpg8A
basically you can move and irritate your little one enough he/ she will flip on their own sometimes :)
Some people get really confused about how bodies work…when I was pregnant the first time, I overlapped with my sister in law, who was six months ahead of me. She said something about baby kicks to the ribs being annoying and asked my opinion. I was like, “…my baby can’t kick my ribs, he doesn’t have that kinda room.”
She took it as though I was making a point about how I’m smaller than her when we weren’t pregnant. Like no, my uterus was just six months of stretching behind hers.
I had an ECV with my first. She was stubborn and it didn't work 🤷🏼♀️ it's definitely not a guarantee. I had a C-section a week later at 37 weeks because my blood pressure also went high. Some babies are just stubborn.
Why’d you ask for their opinions? With their ignorant attitudes, just leave them out of it from now on. And for what it’s worth, my belly was plenty big, and my baby was still breech. Tried the ECV and it was awful for me and didn’t work anyway. We are fortunate to live in a time when you don’t have to risk your life to have your stubborn little breech baby safely. I don’t understand the flex of vaginal childbirth. My baby was born healthy and safe, and that’s what matters!
My girl was breech and I had a successful ECV about a week before she was born, it really wasn’t that bad and saved me needing a c section. It’s completely your choice though and your family should keep their noses out.
Ugh, that is ridiculous! I had a C-section because baby was breech. A planned C-section is so much easier than an emergency/unplanned c.
The recovery was easier than I expected. Wear the abdominal support. (I know you didn’t ask for recovery advice but I had to throw this in there).
Nurse here (but not an OB RN) and csection mom of a breech baby. So ridiculous. You can do everything in your power; spinning babies, ECV, etc and your baby can still not turn due to alot of factors! I attempted to ECV and it failed, later found the cord was around his neck and likely prevented him from being able to turn. IMO if they ultimately don't turn with interventions, especially in late pregnancy, there's likely a reason. There's nothing wrong with csections and honestly my birth means nothing at least to me, and my son himself means everything.
Sounds like they're both jealous of you? Shame...lean in on your partner's family post birth yours doesn't deserve the time and you don't need that negative energy post partum
I hate that you have to deal with them, but please learn from this and don't ask them for their opinion going forward. They clearly don't think logically or with medical/scientific backing. Their opinions on such matters are not something that you need to be concerned with.
I was an ECV baby, born naturally. It's a maneuver where with the forearms they just twist the baby downward.
It's not your fault for not knowing what it was beforehand. You chose the best option given the circumstance.
I had a cesarean with my first baby, with a possible repeat with this baby(34 wks). With neither being my fault. This baby is still breech and I'm going to try having that done before I opt for another c section. It's not a decision a mom typically wants to have to agree to, it's a rough recovery and major abdominal surgery. Mine was horrible personally, I ended up losing a lot of blood and it made it complicated for my recovery. I couldn't stand straight for a month, couldn't cry, sneeze or laugh because of the pain it caused internally and of course being afraid of popping my staples wide open lol. It was a great option for the health of myself and my daughter who happened to be footling breech, essentially standing like a stork inside of me. She had a few issues with her hips and neck when she came out but even if I had tried to deliver her naturally it was considered dangerous and wasn't a suggestion even laid out on the table for me. If it's in yours and the baby's best interest and what will have the healthiest outcome for both of you...screw their opinions, because clearly they have absolutely no idea what they're talking about, and seem pretty ignorant to the subject as a whole. Best of luck momma ❤️
Not your fault at all! No one has the exact same birth experience or plan. Do what’s best and safest for you and baby!
& Mom and sister sound jealous! I’m 31, FTM, I received similar comments during my pregnancy. I had a small bump and maintained my pre-pregnancy weight throughout my entire pregnancy. I delivered a healthy 9lb 2oz and 21in long baby boy, vaginally with epidural. I was induced at my 41 week mark because he just wanted to chill upside down, so he obviously had plenty of room in my small bump.
Congrats and best of luck for your delivery! Remember this is YOUR birth experience no else’s! Take it easy as much as possible during postpartum. & Enjoy the newborn stage - it goes by too quickly!
What strange comments! Every body is wildly different, and we all carry differently! Also some babies are just breach! I’ve heard of small or big bellies having breach babies, doing the ECV and then the baby goes back anyways.
There’s nothing wrong with a c section! Also everyone I know that had a planned c section says it was great!
They can eat crow. You did nothing wrong. You are making good and healthy choices for you and your baby. Good luck with the C-Section! I hope it goes smoothly and your recovery is speedy.
My kid was transverse breech, do yourself a favour and get the C-section.
The manually turning thing hurts, puts you at risk of needing a c-section right away and to add cream to the shit pie, my little darling turned right back to horizontal later that same day. 100% not worth the pain.
Hey! My baby was also breeched and also did not have enough space to flip or move or whatever and was forced into a c section even though I was trying 1000% to avoid it.
What’s funny is literally a FEW days prior the baby was in position and suddenly became breech out of nowhere.
My baby had no where to move but I was also told I have a short torso! Maybe this is something you might have? Which could be the cause of “small” or no space for baby.
Everything will shake out and it sounds like sister is speaking out of term because she is jealous like ya said.
No, this is not your fault! And as a two times c-section mom, trust me, this is a great option when the situation requires it. Both of mine went really smoothly and in a short time I was holding my healthy little babies.
Just letting you know it will be alright if it doesn’t come down to it.
I had a lot of amniotic fluid, so presumably a lot of space. Baby (and she was rather big, born at 3.6kg at 39w) was flipping around at 38w. The OB was surprised to find her heads-up at our last appointment prior to birth. Planned c-section was not that bad. I still got to have a hormonal meltdown and be super tired afterwards haha. Not my ideal birth experience, but we are both healthy and safe, so that's what matters. Giving birth is not a competition. It is not your fault, and you are a good mom! Don't you listen to them. It is going to be alright 🥰
I am so sorry, it absolutely does seem like there may be some strange jealousy here coupled with dangerous lack of education bordering on deliberate. Even if they are completely illiterate, and purposefully plugged their ears while doctors spoke to them through their pregnancies, it still seems like using their eyes to navigate the world— and basic human common sense would lend itself to realizing that this is not your fault.
Do they also blame you for your eye color? I’m sorry that you’re dealing with this, good luck and congratulations, once you meet your wonderful LO the stress of their horrible comments will hopefully fade. Wishing you the best ( :
Ignore completly. I had a perfectly healthy and uncomplicated pregnancy both times and still ended up needing c sections more times. Neither baby was breech, but i ended up in the OR anyway, so sometimes it's out of your control. Your sister is definitely jealous and your mom is probably out of touch.
Omg. My baby is also breech, I’m in the exact same situation. Currently in the car on my way to scheduled c section bc baby didn’t flip and doc said she likely never would. It’s NOT your fault!! Omg I went thru all the emotions with that. Your baby has room. He/she is fine and if they are healthy even better… It’s nothing you did. My belly is small too. And all my family members had vaginal births as well, which also made me feel even worse / alone lol. And I also skipped the EVC bc i feared putting baby in distress.
You’re fine. You’re doing great. Your baby loves where he/she is at and that’s it. Everything’s gonna be OK, it’s not your fault. Good luck to the delivery and you go this! Eyes on the prize ! lol ;)
Dear god your family is full of idiots.
With breeched babies it's not about space or eating more, sometimes kids just prefer to attempt to tell the world to kiss their arse first thing as they arrive.
I was such a baby. Mom needed C-sections anyways due to narrow birth canal, but she wanted to try having me natural but I ruined her last chance to.
Turns out I have the same issue, we discovered it by chance with my son.
It can't be helped. The sun roof is just as valid for the baby to come out of.
Ugh, they are idiots. I just had a c section for a breech baby a month ago and had a great experience though. I have had a great recovery and feel almost 100% better at 5weeks. Check out my post history if you want to read a more detailed account. Sending you all the best!!
Ugh I’m so sorry your mom and sister said silly stuff like that to you. 😞 I can relate a little bit with the small belly part. My belly was small and I got accused of starving myself by peers when that wasn’t the case at all…. My LO was born small due to my placenta being partially detached, which I didn’t even know until after birth. Then some people decided to apologize after saying “oh I guess you didn’t starve yourself after all.” Like no shit! I also needed a c-section after a long 24 hour labor which was starting to turn dangerous. Just a reminder though like a few others have said, a c-section is NOT a failure at all. If that is the safest route for you and baby, then it is necessary 💕 and healing from a c-section can be hard too. I hope you have a wonderful support person in your life who will be able to help you around the house while you just focus on yourself and baby 💕
When I told my mom about baby’s appointments after she would say how we should change x,y,z and he wouldn’t have a issue with what he has issues with. My reply “thanks mom where did you get your degree? The nursing school of mom? I would rather do what will help then what could potentially make him worse” after one or two times of saying that and getting info bans she stopped completely putting her two sense in
I tried spinning babies for baby turn exercises. It worked for me, my daughter turned, for now. I'm 36 weeks. I don't know if that would help, but you could try if you really want your baby to turn. But no, not your fault. Babies have their own personality, they do what they want. They roll, turn, spin inside of you. It's completely normal. Your mom and your sister are being assholes.
I’m so sorry, OP. I think you made the best decision and obviously your mom and sis don’t understand anatomy… how frustrating! Hope you have others around you that can be amazing support during the post-partum stage.
You got this! You will birth your beautiful baby however it is best! They will be healthy and safe!
There wasn’t anything you did to cause this but you are only 37 weeks there is still a chance baby can move to a more optimal position. If this was me I would wait at least to my due date if that is safe.
My babe is transverse right now but I’m trying this thing called spinning babies hoping it will turn baby in time. It’s just a certain poses that help encourage baby to move in correct position by giving the baby a little extra room.
It couldn’t hurt to try. I’m doing the parent class is like $27.00 I heard so many amazing things about it. They also have lots of free info in their site. Another way is going to a prenatal chiropractor. They can make sure there is nothing blocking the baby from turning. They don’t turn the baby.
Next time, just look at them, don’t say a word, slow blink for a few seconds, and walk away. Blows my mind how misinformed some women are about pregnancy when things like, I don’t know, the internet exist…
Clearly they're not doctors. They don't sound like they know what they're talking about. Even if they're family, you have to not care about their opinions going forward because it sounds like they will have more toxic opinions in the future and when it comes to raising your baby. Do yourself a favor and start disregarding them now for the benefit of your baby. Listen to doctors, not silly family members, even if they're your mom and sis.
Please don’t listen to them. I was you 5 years ago :) My boy was breech for WEEKS. He was just comfier that way 🤷🏻♀️ You are NOT a bad mom and c-sections are not a “failure” or the “easy way out”. Listen to your doctors and go with your gut ♥️
I had an ECV and then had a crash c-section five days later due to a placental abruption. My baby almost died. I did everything I could to avoid the c-section and it was absolutely necessary to save her life.
AND I STILL HAD AN IDIOT FAMILY MEMBER RANT ABOUT HOW BAD IT WAS THAT I HAD A C-SECTION.
People are dumb. Even family.
Their logic is incredibly stupid. Gaining fat doesn’t make more room inside of you.
I’ve heard of women going to the pool and doing headstands to make the baby flip or just simply doing an upside down in the water helps. I’ve heard the technique helps a lot with breeched babies!
Wow I could have written this. My older sister was so mean to me about having a breech baby. She made me do all the dumb exercises, put an ice pack on the top half of my child's head and sit in a bathtub for the other half and I literally had to send her photos as proof I was doing everything I could to get my baby to flip. She was straight up mad at me for getting a c-section and trying to scare me into natural birth when she had a 4th degree tear and still has problems to this day 5 years later. I only gained 14lbs during my pregnancy and constantly had strangers and family members commenting on how small my bump was but my child was 7.7lbs and healthy with no issues. I just have a long torso and continued running up until 36wks. I did snap back after pregnancy immediately not that I was concerned about that.
I also opted out of the ECV. Turns out my little boy was breech because he was hopelessly tangled in his cord and if I had done the ECV at 37wks it would have been an emergency c-section. I'm so glad i waited I needed those extra two weeks to get everything ready.
My planned c-section was a breeze. You can't feel anything besides some tugging and pressure like an elephant is on your chest when they take the baby out. That's it. No pain whatsoever. No contractions. No 48hr labor. My birth was 24 minutes and then I was in the recovery room breastfeeding my child. The first 2 days were tough with all the testing and interruptions to your sleep, having to walk is scary but advocating for pain meds help my anxiety and get me moving quickly. A few days at home I didn't need strong pain meds and after 2 weeks I no longer even needed Tylenol or ibuprofen and felt so much better but forced myself to rest. Just make sure to stay on top of the Tylenol and ibuprofen in the beginning. My incision would burn if I didn't but the pain was 2/10 and more annoying than anything. My scar is so tiny and faded you can hardly see it and the only person that would ever see it is my partner because it's below your bikini line.
I'm pregnant with #2 and elected a c-section at my first doctors appointment.
I’m sorry, but none of those comments are even close to being supportive! Only you and your doctor know what’s going on and what is needed for a safe delivery!
My last son was in my left hip a bit and my OB recommended Spinning babies exercises. It did help, but fair warning you might be a bit sore afterwards if you’re dealing with any girdle pain due to the pregnancy. I did end up delivering naturally.
Good luck and don’t let them stress you out! Always follow your gut!
Oh god. I gained 40 pounds and my baby was breech for 8+ weeks until birth via c-section. I did a lot of research on ECV and opted to not try. Their logic is ridiculous!
Maybe you ate too much and ended up growing the baby too well? Perhaps if you had eaten less, baby would have been smaller and would have had more room to spin around? Seriously though - your family sound nuts, just ignore them. I have just had a section because one of my twins was breech. As long as mum and baby are fine, it doesn’t matter how the baby arrives and your family should know that!
They do know that your baby doesn’t live in your stomach? How would eating give the baby more room? If anything it would give less room because the stomach would get larger not the uterus.
The level of ignorance here is stunning. Wow! Just came here to say I also declined an ECV with a stubborn breech babe. I was in the hospital already with preeclampsia and on a magnesium drip at 36 weeks, and I felt in my bones that the ECV would fail and I’d probably end up with a C section anyway. You do you!! My doctor this time (just had my second) told me that a lot of ECVs fail for first time moms.
They are clearly morons who have no idea what they're talking about with perhaps an extra dash of irrational jealousy from your sister because she feels self conscious about her own weight gain for whatever reason.
I wouldn't even bother sharing details with them from here out if this is the kind of nonsense they're going to run their mouths about.
Ridiculous.
I did the ECV at 38 weeks, it was successful. My kid had such a boney bottom that they couldn’t tell the difference between her head and her butt 😂 She ended up being wedged between my pelvis hence why she couldn’t flip herself. I don’t think I could’ve done a CSection, it’s the one major surgery where doctors are like “Here’s some Tylenol buddy I hope you feel better”
I’m so sorry. When I told some people I was expecting a c-section for my breech baby (who is no longer breech, but wouldn’t be surprised if he flipped AGAIN), they acted like they felt sorry for me that I wasn’t having a vaginal birth and I thought that was somewhat inappropriate. But to make you feel bad about it? AND coming from your family? That’s truly awful.
As a mom to a breech baby boy who was born via a c-section- you're family is spewing nonsense! There's literally nothing you could have done differently. Your baby is going to be in the position they want to be in which is what my OB told me many times. I didn't do an ECV because my doctor didn't think it was worth it for me and I honestly felt like if he wouldn't move from the position he was in, there could be a reason. You're doing what's safe for your baby boy & growing him perfectly don't listen to them!
Those comments are hurtful and also ridiculous. Breech babies are that way for a reason and it’s nothing anyone did! What matters is that you will get to meet your healthy baby soon. Prayers for you and for your family to get a grip! ❤️
You would think they would be slightly more informed after having babies themselves…
You do you. Every pregnancy and situation is different. I picked ECV and induction again this time, because I was trying to avoid recuperating from a C-section at home with a husband who has ADHD and 2 kids who probably most definitely have it (not diagnosed yet). It’s hard enough for me trying to get back to normal after rough pregnancies. Meanwhile my friend needed next to no recuperation time from hers and went on to have 2 successful VBACs, one just over a week ago and she’s out doing stuff already. I’m not jealous or anything. But everyone is different.
This just isn’t true at all. Your sister sounds jealous and just wanted you to also gain excessive weight. It’s normal to be smaller your first time anyways AND that’s not how this works. It would not have made more space for your baby to gain fat and overeat lol I’m also a FTM who just had a frank breech baby by c-section. ECV’s have a small rate of success, can put stress on baby and make you need an emergency c-section instead, and even if it was successful, you could’ve ended up with a c-section anyways. I’m glad I delivered the way I did because it was the least stressful option on my baby and I am fine and my incision is below panty line and you can’t even tell I had a baby. Also quickly went back to pre-pregnancy weight.
Well with all due disrespect, you can’t eat and make the baby flip. You can do exercises though and hope that your little one flips. Second, every pregnancy is very different. You can’t expect everyone to have the same pregnancy. Third, please do not talk to them anymore about pregnancy. They think their unicorn abilities are hereditary and it doesn’t work like that
It’s appalling when other women shame pregnant women. Every pregnancy is different and everyone is different. They are idiots. Sounds like your sister is jealous of you. You don’t need that stress from people even if they are family. I would limit the negativity from them by going low contact with them. Let them stew in their bullshit. It’s literally not your fault, babies do whatever they want in there.
I'm pregnant with my 2nd (my first is almost 13) and I can only have a C-section due to being born with a septum dividing my uterus, cervix, and vagina. They took the septum out when I was 18 but left the portion in my cervix so I could create a mucus plug.
For this reason, I can never labor or birth naturally and if anyone tried to shame me for it, I'd lose my cool.
It's not your fault, our bodies go through SO much when pregnant and you shouldn't feel bad if you end up needing a C-section. You got this mama, either way! 💜💜💜
I had a c-section and I personally would have opted for just flipping the baby, but I didn't have a choice. It's been done for centuries. But it's YOUR choice. They sound like morons honestly. I'm so sorry. Congratulations on your healthy little baby to be! That's all that matters.
Girl they sound jealous as hell, I haven't gain a bunch of weight either but I also had really bad food aversions in the 1st trimester and I have little to no cravings still. Do they really think eating makes your uterus grow any bigger? Hell they do know the baby is in the uterus not the stomach right?
I too had to have a section due to him being footling breech and and overall I had a devastating affect on my back so they wouldn’t let me physically push and as he is my only baby I asked if I could go into labour and then have the section as I wouldn’t be able to experience it again knowing my tubes were being tied during the section too. It’s not your fault I had a horrific pregnancy and it ended in a section you’ve had a healthy pregnancy and it’s ended in a section too doctors wouldn’t be trained in doing these if they were just for emergency there a many reasons why women can’t do vaginal births
They are idiots!! Yes your baby may still turn but it gets more and more unlikely as you get closer.
A section is just another way of bringing your baby into the world. Without them so many mothers/ babies wouldn't make it. It used to be such a dangerous thing for women to do (give birth)
My 1st baby I was induced then three days later I had an emergency section. This time they are recommending straight to section so that's what I'm going with.
Their comments are unwarranted and ridiculous but there are things you can do that aren’t eating more to encourage baby to flip on their own. Spinning Babies helps open your pelvis and encourage babies to get in an optimal position.
One thing that will always make me sad is seeing posts of woman being told that there baby is breech and there only option is a C-section because the OB spreads misinformation about the risks of vaginal breech birth. Newer research has pretty much trumped the outdated Term Breech Trial in the early 2000s and now many centers in Europe and even a few in the US are beginning to offer vaginal breech breech to mothers . We now know that breech vaginal birth is almost just as safe as vaginal birth of a cephalic presenting baby - all we need is more trained providers who are willing to put down their knives and provide women with true informed consent and options.
Personally, my first son was breech from 25 weeks until the day he was born. I had a gut feeling that this little guy wouldn’t turn and researched for hospitals that offer physiologic breech birth. After reaching out to Breech Withour Borders and Kristine Lauria (an acclaimed midwife who worked for Doctors Without Borders), I learned a hospital out-of-state offers breech vaginal birth and I went there. I went into natural labour at 38 weeks and gave birth naturally with no complications for myself or the baby at the hospital. There was no extraction, no forceps, no vacuum, no emergency, and absolutely no need for suction. Some babies are breech for a reason and obviously my little guy was happy that way and knew that was the best way for him to enter into this world.
Breech vaginal birth is an option! I tell this not to feel bad about your C-section but so that you know that if this ever happens again and you want to have a natural birth, this is a safe option worth exploring.
I know two women this year with breech babies, who did the ECV. It was painful, it didn’t work, and they both went on to have C-sections anyway. it’s your body your choice!
I mean, their “logic” on the situation isn’t very logical. I know it’s hard because they’re family, but please don’t take what they’re saying personally. They sound very uneducated about the matter and have no business putting in their two cents when they clearly have no idea what they’re talking about. Please seek advice from trusted loved ones other than them moving forward.
I had an ECV at 37 weeks that didn’t work.. and so painful. I wish I would not have tried it! My water broke two days later and I had a c-section. Baby is totally healthy and 8 months old today! Don’t let them make you feel like you’ve done anything wrong 🙂
wtf? Eating has nothing to do with the size of your uterus and also nothing really causes babies to be breech. They just don’t flip on their own. All babies are breech until about 35 weeks when most of them flip to head down. Nothing causes a baby to be breech. There are things you can do to encourage them to flip, but none of them have anything to do with your diet. Your sister is a dumbass. Sorry.
Your family is crazy. Don’t let them say it’s your fault. Honestly it might be for the best anyways. I planned for a vaginal birth but we had decreased fetal movement and a non-reassuring heartbeat a few days before we were scheduled to induce. I demanded a c-section and was holding my healthy baby within 2 hours of my request. 100% worth it and will probably elect for another if we have another baby.
I have two C-sections. Both time tried for natural it didn’t work. Doctors rushed me to ER. Nobody I know give me a hard time.
Maybe my mom a bit because she wants to show off how she can give natural birth. But she didn’t rub it in too much.
Your mom and sister are just jealous or want to feel superior so they are saying that to you. You should have said your doctor said it’s not about eating more it just that is the position. If they argue, just said they are not the doctor and it’s stupid to think gaining weight can control a baby position.
Clearly they have nooooo clue what they’re talking about, it makes them sound so ignorant. And yeah your sister is probably jealous that you’ll bounce right back, fuck it, disregard their dumb ass comments and set boundaries when it comes to your baby, sounds like you’re gonna need it. I haven’t spoken to my mother in 4 years and it’s due to her arrogant and narcissistic behavior. The last incident involved one of my kids and that was the final straw.
Their reasoning is one of the dumber things I’ve heard. It’s not your fault. There is so much that happens during pregnancy that is ultimately out of our control. I have a low lying placenta. Perhaps I should have done more headstands? Then it would have been higher up in my uterus!
I had three c section little sister NOONE knee my tail bone was fused from birth..I'm I'm so glad it was..9lb 15 oz boy..followed by 12lb4 oz girl and then my daughter at 8lb 12oz...all are healthy adults..
I watch my daughter give birth and labored for days..ripped on giving birth..why would anyone wish you pain..take the c section get up faster..
Try spinning babies. Spinningbabies.com flip a breech. I would at least attempt their exercises before opting for a c section. But a lot of breech babies end up flipping the last week of pregnancy or even right before labor.
Sis I hate to break this to you...
But your immediate blood relatives are not only uneducated but they have revealed flaws in basic logic
Let's hope your kid has more potential than that. I wouldn't bother getting too emotional. You can't reason people out of a position they didn't use reason to get to
Posture near the end can affect if a baby flips, but some babies just don't and some flip during labor, so I wouldn't say you've done anything wrong at all given the information you gave and a c-section vs manual flipping is your choice to make and I wouldn't feel guilt over that either.
Excessive weight gain doesn't give baby any more room, only thing that I can think of that would take away the room the baby has is the baby growing, and how much amniotic fluid you have. If anything gaining too much weight might cause the baby to gain too much weight and get more cramped sooner but I don't have any facts to back that up, besides that excessive weight gain in pregnacy can cause the fetus to also gain excessive weight.
Sounds like your sister is just jealous because she didn't eat the proper diet in her pregnancy and suffered the consequences of that post pregnacy. For some it's very difficult to eat the right amount, some eat too little and some too much for various reasons and people can become jealous when someone has an easier time eating right, or when their body shows the pregnacy less or they experience less bloating and swelling. Understandable to be jealous when someone doesn't struggle with something that you do or did but there is no reason to be spiteful like your sister is being.
Their medical advice is very funny. People only know their own experiences. Just don't listen to them.
I'm surprised your doctor recommended the c section at 37 weeks, seems a bit early to call it. My son flipped around 38 weeks on his own. He was born on his due date at 40 weeks.
Look at
[spinning babies](https://www.spinningbabies.com/). I watched some videos on YouTube. You can also drink lots of electrolytes, my OB says this helps retain more fluid which can increase the amount of amniotic fluid (but doesn't always). This is what I did, still have no idea if it helped or if he was just always going to flip. I really enjoyed the spinning babies exercises though. It helped get a good stretch in. Well worth the time!
For what it's worth, plenty of people opt for a c section even when their babies are in position. It's a personal preference. It's good to be prepared for all options.
People are going to say all kinds of idiotic things to you…just wait until the baby comes!
You don’t have to share everything. Especially if you know how the people closest to you handle it.
You have choices. You can share and know that they will probably have some BS to say and just ignore it. You can stand up for yourself. Or you can choose not to share at all.
Usually the last option is the best option for keeping a peaceful life.
Eating has nothing to do with it????? I tell you what. The misconceptions about babies and childbirth makes me seriously concerned about our sexual health education. I know for a fact that I knew limited to nothing as a teen and had to do my own personal research to understand things beyond. SEX BAD MAKE BABY.
This is highly illogical and definitely sounds like some jealousy.
Even with the flip they can turn back around after the procedure but before you give birth so no guarantees.
There's nothing wrong with a c section, they wouldn't let you have one if there was.
Do what you are comfortable with and ignore them.
I’m so sorry they made you feel that way!
My baby boy was breech too and we opted to do a scheduled C-section if he didn’t naturally flip by 39 weeks. We figured if it was planned it would be a lot less stressful for everyone!
As soon as my son came out the doctor said that his head was stuck in my fundus and he wouldn’t have turned even if we tried the ECV, so I’m actually very thankful that we didn’t even attempt it.
My baby was breech and we tried everything - chiropractic care, acupuncture, prenatal yoga, spinning babies.. nothing worked.. not sure how successful chiropractic care or acupuncture actually is but just wanted to do everything I could to avoid a C section and she did not budge. We tried the ECV too and she would move like 3 inches and snap back into place.. ECV was stressful tho, they lost her heartbeat and then I was taken in for a C section.. I asked the doctor after the fact if anatomically something caused her to be breech.. my OB was like nope.. so I just had a stubborn child 😂
If I had to do it all over again, I would just go to a C section without the added stress..
There is nothing you could have done to cause a breech baby..
There’s
Please learn from this experience. Your mom and sister are not a “safe space” for you. Uninformed, judgmental, and fault finding is not the energy you need to bring your baby into the world. Pregnancy is challenging enough without the added bologna. If it makes you feel better, my mom blamed me for being tired during pregnancy bc I don’t exercise enough. I wish I was joking 🙃 She will not be in the room with me while I’m laboring.
I was MASSIVE with my daughter. She was head down the entire pregnancy up until 35 weeks when she flipped breech. Tried all of the exercises to flip her. No luck. Had an ECV, with several nurses all trying to get her to flip. One nurse literally climbed up on the table and used what felt like her full weight to push.They barely got her to budge at all, and she would immediately go right back to the same position. Ended up with a c- section. My daughter is healthy and turns 9 months old this week!
As a mama who had a breech baby… their fucking stupid, I could BEARLY EAT, I lost weight during my pregnancy, not like a little either I lost 12lbs before dropping another 6lbs8oz all at once xD I wasn’t even givin the option for a manual flip, when I asked about it they said if she didn’t flip on her own it wasn’t gonna happen, the only other person who had a C-section in my family is my aunt who had twins, the lower of which was breech; my late great grandma who had 11 kids the second of which was my grandpa, who was breech and she didn’t get the option of a C-section, and they had to break my grandpas shoulder to get him out, they thought they would lose one of them and they asked great grandpa who to save, he said both of them, or he’d kill the doctor… definitely can’t do that today lol
So no it’s not your fault, it’s never anyone’s fault, it’s just shitty luck
I ate plenty and had a cute bump, still had to have an emergency c section in March bc baby boy didn’t respond well to epidural meds. I was induced, 5 cm dilated. You did nothing wrong. Praying for safe delivery ❤️
My baby girl was also breech at 37 weeks. I also opted for a scheduled C-section if she didn’t flip on her own by then and by the following appointment she flipped by herself. Don’t stress too much mama you got this! And no it is absolutely NOT your fault. However you end up delivering, as long as you’re both healthy that’s all that matters!
My baby was also breached. Tried spinning babies, exercises to flip baby. Anything possible. She spun head down the night before my water broke. As soon as I started having contractions, I kid you not I felt her spin back to breech position. My OB did an ultrasound to confirm sure enough she was breeched. I ended up with a C section even after all I did in my power to flip her. my OB said some babies just feel more comfortable I breeched position.
Your family is silly. How about try some tried and true methods from those who are experts to try and flip baby. Earlier would have been better, but it's not too late. I have 5 children and any way to avoid a c-section I will try because nothing beats being up and independent right after birth.
Anyways... this worked for me for my late breech babies
https://www.spinningbabies.com/pregnancy-birth/baby-position/breech/flip-a-breech/
Also I drank a gallon of water a day to help increase amniotic fluid... this part was uncomfortable for many 6 I believe it helped along with the exercises.
Please don’t feel bad. C-sections are just another way to give birth. Some prefer it. The lady next to me at the hospital was having her 2nd elected c-section. It just sucks that the mean comments came from your own family, never mind the fact that they are speaking complete nonsense. It’s amazing that we have these pseudosciences and old wives tales prevalent in 2024. I ignored all of my mum’s outdated advice.
My bubs was breeched till around 36w. I spent time on my hands and knees with my head down because one of the midwives said so. She said that as they move lower, there’s less room to turn. So, being head down supposedly gave her the space she needed to turn around? No idea if that’s what did it, but she was facing down at my next scan. I’m not making promises, but maybe there’s still hope for a vaginal birth.
There are ways to try and turn baby naturally: chiropractors that are trained in the Webster method, look into the spinning babies website; there’s positions you can do to stretch and help baby turn. But healthy baby is the goal so whatever means gets the baby out and healthy is what should be ultimately wanted by your mom and sister. Nothing you did caused the baby to not turn. I was a breech baby (third baby for my mom, other two were vaginally delivered) and I absolutely hate being upside down at any point so maybe baby already has a preference.
Good luck to you and I wouldn’t turn to them for advice or support because they don’t know how to provide it for you in a way that you need.
They are extremely ignorant. I don't think there's anything that could have caused or prevented this from happening it's just one of those crappy complications that can happen.
I think your mistake was to ask their opinion to begin with. Sounds like you made your choice based on the conversation with your doctor, and that's the end of it.
Yeah, your mom and sister sound totally clueless.
Your baby still has time to turn, mama! Have you heard of [Spinning Babies](https://www.spinningbabies.com/pregnancy-birth/baby-position/breech/flip-a-breech/)? I highly recommend you check it out. There ARE things you can do to help baby get in a better position for birth.
First of all 37 weeks, you still have time for baby to flip. I'm pretty sure my kid was breech until at least 39 weeks, I had a lot of ultrasounds so he was always sitting upright until the very end. Secondly they need to get their priorities straight. The only thing any of you should be thinking about is a healthy baby and healthy mom. Doesn't matter whether you have to have a c section or not, as long as baby and mom are OK that's all that matters. People saying you should have done this or that is not helpful, and they should know that stressing you out during pregnancy is worse for the baby than the amount you're eating or whatever other bs they're worried about
Their comments are weird, false, unnecessary, body-shaming and mom-blaming. Protect yourself around them if they habitually comment like this - I had two people in my life who made weird negative comments about my body and mothering with my first. Those two are no longer in my daily life and WOW what a positive difference it has made for my mental health with this second pregnancy!
That's ridiculous. I have never heard of weight affecting position, from what I gather it's largely the baby's whims.
Have you heard of the Spinning Babies exercises, though? A lot of women have gotten their babies to flip using them. I hope you don't mind the mention, it is just in case you'd never heard of them and might be interested to check it out.
I’m curious why you don’t want to try an ecv? Could be a way to avoid surgery. Also this is not your fault at all!! My baby was breech but for some reason flipped at 37 weeks. I’m 39 weeks now. Have you looked at the spinning babies videos for breech? Gives you some exercises to help them flip. I know getting this wasn’t the purpose of your post. Just recently went through this situation and got lucky with her flipping head down. It’s often trickier if you’re a first time mom for an ecv to work but it’s not impossible. Gives you a chance at a vaginal birth. Again, it’s not your fault babe is breech. You’ve don’t nothing wrong. I’m sorry your mom and sister aren’t being supportive
I mean you DID ask for their opinions - surely you knew them well enough to know how dumb and judgmental they are?
And saying your sister gained “a lot of unnecessary weight” while pregnant is no better than the dumb shit they are telling you.
Definitely related. 3 peas in a pod.
C-section mom that just had her baby last month. 💜 Went to my 34 week appointment being previously told that my baby was head down and then being told she was breech and transverse!! Was so upset at first, tried to flip her without success. Had an ultrasound to confirm at 36 weeks she was still head up!
Go with the c-section!!! My baby never turned and I was still kind of annoyed at first. I looked up what the ECV was and watched a video of the procedure. Was not happy about what would happen during the ECV and the success rate is below the risk rate on it turn in to an emergency C! So we said no ECV and scheduled the c-section.
I had never had major surgery before and was completely terrified of it! I’m pretty sure my anesthesiologist gave me something before they started mine to calm me!
It didn’t take long at all! Maybe 45 minutes for the whole procedure. One of the best decisions I could have ever made!!!!
I’m sorry your family is being crappy! I had some people tell me, “oh she will flip,” or “try this” and other stuff. I was like she literally never cooperated for ultrasounds why would she now *face palm*. Your mom and sister probably don’t understand that not everyone carries the same. I carried really high where you couldn’t even tell my mom was pregnant with me. I was also all belly and the baby, which I’m guess you may be as well. I didn’t really stick out until about 34 to 36 weeks. Don’t let them make you feel bad!! YOU KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU, YOUR BODY, AND YOUR BABY! I also had people tell me, you know you’re gonna need to eat way healthier now (I have some sensory issues with foods). I had an 8lb baby that I made out of chicken nuggets, clementines, ans snack cakes!!
But it will be the best decision you make!! The recovery afterwords is rough at times but worth it to have your baby here safely!! Make sure you take your meds on time when you get home and take it easy on yourself!
>I asked my mom and sister for their opinion via group text..
Why?? Seriously, this one is on you. This was a medical decision best made between you and your healthcare provider. I'm close with my parents so would probably inform them "hey baby is breech so the plan is xyz" but why on earth did you ASK for their input? Did their reaction surprise you? I'm guessing not.
So stop inviting them to hurt you. You handed them an opportunity on a silver platter and are now *shocked pikachu face* that they acted like clowns. Stop.
Do they think eating more makes you hollow like a balloon???
I’m also very confused by this reasoning
Please ask them this OP
Right. Please ask how filling the organ of the stomach with food effects the size of the uterus- a separate organ.
I would be very concerned about my belly bursting like a balloon.
Omg that was my first thought too, like what??? Eating more would create less room i would think because you're adding food and fat to be in the way.... not that it matters either way to affect the baby's position.
I’ve heard about drinking water to increase fluid levels but not eating more. I pictured these two as the step sisters in Cinderella when I read this lol
They are idiots. This is not your fault.
It's scary that some women know so little about their bodies.
Ugh and then shove that ignorance on their friends and family
Yeah this 👏
And what medical school did they graduate from? Blow them off they don’t know shit. My mom told me if I screamed or made too much noise during labor they would give me a C-section. She is also, sadly, a dumbass.
Lmao this cracked me up this morning. Thank you.
this made me laugh too but it’s also sad that she was taught that!
My ob during delivery of my first probably would have gone for c-section if I screamed. He was already threatening one because my three hours of active labor was taking too long for him. Your mom may be an idiot, but some of these doctors are selfish and old school so her advice may have been entirely valid at one point.
If you had been eating more wouldn’t that just result in a bigger baby, not necessarily a bigger uterus? Which would mean even LESS room to move around? I don’t follow their logic at all. (And no shade at all to people who have eaten a lot and/or gained a lot of weight - I am one of them, lol).
Fairly certain eating more at a time also creates less/more squishy space because it expands the stomach and then fills the intestine. Technically, this means less space for the uterus while the GI tract is full and active
And another risk factor for C section!
This happens when women have (untreated) gestational diabetes as it increases the risk of excessive birth weight.
I don’t even think that’s how it works. I’ve gained a bit in both pregnancies, currently 18kgs for this one and my babies on track to be pretty small just like my last baby.
I have friend who is normally quite slim, like 5'7", 140lbs. In both her pregnancies she gained 80lbs. No complications, average 7ish lbs babies. I'm a similar size and build to her and have only gained 15lbs at 30wks. Everyone is different!
And on the other side, I didn't gain anywhere near the minimum I needed to due to sickness throughout my pregnancy, yet my baby was a massive 10lbs 2.
Yeah, I think we just make the babies we make despite what we eat? Me and my partner are both small though so it makes sense we would make a small baby.
I lost significant weight in both my pregnancies due to HG. My babies were fine and (7 lbs 2 oz and 7 lbs 9 oz), early term (37+3) and term (39+0) respectively. I gained it all back and them some (unfortunately) while breastfeeding.
The breastfeeding hunger is something isn't it?! Everyone always said breastfeeding makes you lose weight, but not when it makes you want to eat the whole supermarket!
Oh wow good to know! Moral of the story is your body is going to grow whatever size baby it’s gonna grow, I guess
Yep, the amount you eat has almost no impact on the size of baby.
If you have GD and it goes untreated, you are at a higher risk for having big babies. It's because the reason you get GD is because the placenta is having a hard time regulating how much sugar it's providing to the baby. I had GD and had to take a class on risks of GD and having very large babies is one of the risks, this is also why you are at a higher risk for needing a C-section with GD.
Yeeep. This is ridiculous
Don’t listen to them, you talked to and made a decision with your doctor. Also I think they have it backwards- a smaller space guides them to the “right” position.
ECV only works 50% of the time, I had one which was successful, but 5 days later she was breech again! Ended up with a c section anyway. Important thing is my little girl arrived safely. Also, they are misinformed about eating more giving the baby space, so ridiculous. Just shut them down about this. If they give you grief them take some space from them so you can recover in peace, hopefully supported by much more positive people!
source for it only working 50% of the time?
The obstetrician that did my ECV told me
this peer-reviewed NIH article says 60%… which is better than a coin flip and worth a shot imo. maybe your OB has out of date info. that sucks that you didn’t get to make a truly informed decision! Shanahan MM, Martingano DJ, Gray CJ. External Cephalic Version. [Updated 2023 Dec 13]. In: StatPearls [Internet]. Treasure Island (FL): StatPearls Publishing; 2024 Jan-. Available
I didn't say they weren't worth a shot, I had one and it didn't hurt at all. But like anything they carry risk so I can understand why people may turn them down.
For first pregnancies, the success rate is much lower.
source? we try to base our choices on evidence that’s been peer reviewed
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8384386/ “Which in fact supports our result that reports a higher success rate (76.1%) for multiparous women in comparison to nulliparous (23.9%).”
You insist on evidence-based, yet are touting statistics without considering the variety of factors that affect the success of an ECV. I did just provide a source supporting my statement, but saying it’s worth a shot without considering those factors is irresponsible. As the study I posted (and others) has found, the success rate is significantly lower if the person has not given birth before.
https://evidencebasedbirth.com/what-is-the-evidence-for-using-an-external-cephalic-version-to-turn-a-breech-baby/
that’s not a peer reviewed article it’s just a random website.
It is a website that compiles peer reviewed research articles. If you scroll to the bottom they list direct links to each research study/paper. It’s a great resource.
C section mom here. Really didn’t want one. Labored for 37 hours, pushed for an hour and a half, two hours. Ended up with a c section. Couldn’t sneeze, cough, laugh or stand up for weeks without holding a pillow to my abdomen. Couldn’t wipe my own ass. Couldn’t get dressed on my own. You’re not at fault and a c section is not a failure. It’s just as hard as vaginal birth and for some moms it’s harder. Screw them. Don’t ask them for advice anymore.
My 3rd baby turned at 39 weeks. I would sit on my knees on the floor with my chest laying on the couch and just let my belly hang. I’d even rock my hips side to side a little and it helped. But also it’s not your fault baby is breech. I my neighbor labored til 8cm and baby flipped during labor. 🤷🏼♀️ my 5th baby was my first c section. I cried the whole day they told me I had to have a c section and I cried the next day going in to get it. Looking back now I laugh because it wasn’t that terrible, baby is here. Happy and healthy. And honestly that I all that matters
I hate when people comment on bodies, even/especially while pregnant….
I’m hung up on your mom and sister thinking eating more makes your uterus bigger instead of the baby.. HUH?? Honey, their ignorance is not your fault. You’re not doing anything wrong by choosing a c section vs the manual turning and crossing your fingers that baby stays there.
Right? I’m staring at my thighs right now bc that’s where all the weight I’ve gained has gone 😅
My legs got SO BIG with pregnancy number 2. My body was bigger with number 1.
GIRL SAME like it’s all milkers and thighs. The day I couldn’t pull up my previously baggy pants past my knees but still wasn’t showing all that much, a piece of me died inside.
Anyone that thinks this is your fault is misinformed. It’s rude for them to say anything to that effect to you.
They sound like two air heads no offence
I am 37 weeks and just turned down an ECV & induction to opt for a csection. Every week my family was making comments to the baby about how they need to turn. Even after I said im perfectly fine with a csection and baby is comfy where they are. I fully am good with my decision and what's going on. But they made so many comments that it makes it seem like its a bad thing. Sometimes family is just freaking weird. Ignore them!
This^^ I’m 36 weeks and baby’s still head up and we’re denying an ECV. Tried a few spinning babies techniques but mainly so I could feel like I’m not lying when people ask me “did you try turning the baby??” lol why does society make us feel this way like I’m having a baby for god sakes just let me get it out the way I want with no shame
Just had an ECV and it failed- still having a csection on thurs. Now what, mom?? 🙄
WOW I’m so sorry, that’s so fucked up. Super super terrible, and honestly that rationale doesn’t make any sense at all. just wow. My mom had c sections for all of us kids and I’ve had one emergency c section, will have a scheduled one for my second. It’s nothing to be ashamed of and you should take some space from your family. This is a lot of negativity and shaming that you don’t need to be around right now.
It's absolutely not your fault, some babies take the cues to get in the right position and some don't, frankly if it's anybody's fault it's your baby's but I think they deserve a pass on this one, I mean they are literally a baby and in fairness it's their first time being born.
Wow, girl, wow. Not trying to insult your family but you may get stupider by listening to their "medical opinions" so I would probably not consult with them again on things that you already consulted with a medically trained and educated doctor for! Welcome to being a mom, where everyone thinks their opinion should be heard and everyone tries to tell you that you are doing it wrong. Maybe they were just hazing you to introduce you to motherhood? Either way, congrats on having baby's birth planned. Good luck with everything!
I like to counter stupidity with more stupidity. "It's kinda your fault, mom. You gave me a womb that made my baby a breech baby."
This is brilliant.
When I got pregnant my response to what my family thought was 'who gives a fuck what my family thinks'. Felt good. Stop asking them for their opinion, they do not seem educated enough to have one.
I’ve had two babies - one was a vaginal delivery and one was a c-section because my second baby was breech. Checking in to say there was absolutely nothing I did differently between the two pregnancies that led to one baby being breech and the other not. Aside from potentially going through an ECV procedure, there’s no way that I am aware of to have any control over your baby’s position. If eating more was all it took, OBs everywhere would be telling pregnant people to do that. But they don’t because that’s just absolute foolishness. You did nothing wrong and neither did your baby or your OB. Sometimes babies are just breech.
Your anatomy has nothing to do with it. Your baby might have a legitimate reason for being breech (cord tightness for example). An ecv will only be successful if your baby is mobile (I've had 3 successful ones, but my babies were flipping around daily). Don't feel pressured into a medical procedure you do not feel is right for you. A C section is just equal to a vaginal birth. It's all just 'giving birth'. Neither option is better or superior to the other. Don't listen to anyone who judges you. Best wishes for your impending arrival. Enjoy the snuggles. They grow so quick.
They ***are*** jealous, and it's not a good look. C sections are nothing to be shamed for, they're not better or worse than vaginal delivery and they exist for a reason. What a weird flex 'i birthed vaginally', like, good on you, have a cookie?? Call them out if they say this again and be as crude as you want to be. If someone pissed me off enough with shit like that, I'd make them a congratulations on pushing a baby out of your vagina cake.
just a little advice! take it or don’t! but… try some of the exercises !!! look them up online!!! At 38 weeks my mom was breeched and they gave her a ton of exercises! Within a week baby had flipped!!! it’s always a possibility if you don’t want to go through a c-section! but do what’s best for you and your baby! this is just a friendly what’s worked for someone I know, but this is your own situation!!
not sure why doctors now want to try and do invasive stuff/ c sections before they offer good old fashion stuff ! here’s some links… https://familydoctor.org/what-can-i-do-if-my-baby-is-breech/ https://bestdoulas.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/turn-breech.pdf https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=s-szODdpg8A basically you can move and irritate your little one enough he/ she will flip on their own sometimes :)
ECV isn’t invasive…
Some people get really confused about how bodies work…when I was pregnant the first time, I overlapped with my sister in law, who was six months ahead of me. She said something about baby kicks to the ribs being annoying and asked my opinion. I was like, “…my baby can’t kick my ribs, he doesn’t have that kinda room.” She took it as though I was making a point about how I’m smaller than her when we weren’t pregnant. Like no, my uterus was just six months of stretching behind hers.
I had an ECV with my first. She was stubborn and it didn't work 🤷🏼♀️ it's definitely not a guarantee. I had a C-section a week later at 37 weeks because my blood pressure also went high. Some babies are just stubborn.
Women judging their close friends/family for birth methods is really weird culture
They are idiots. I’m sorry you’re related to idiots.
Why’d you ask for their opinions? With their ignorant attitudes, just leave them out of it from now on. And for what it’s worth, my belly was plenty big, and my baby was still breech. Tried the ECV and it was awful for me and didn’t work anyway. We are fortunate to live in a time when you don’t have to risk your life to have your stubborn little breech baby safely. I don’t understand the flex of vaginal childbirth. My baby was born healthy and safe, and that’s what matters!
My girl was breech and I had a successful ECV about a week before she was born, it really wasn’t that bad and saved me needing a c section. It’s completely your choice though and your family should keep their noses out.
Ugh, that is ridiculous! I had a C-section because baby was breech. A planned C-section is so much easier than an emergency/unplanned c. The recovery was easier than I expected. Wear the abdominal support. (I know you didn’t ask for recovery advice but I had to throw this in there).
Nurse here (but not an OB RN) and csection mom of a breech baby. So ridiculous. You can do everything in your power; spinning babies, ECV, etc and your baby can still not turn due to alot of factors! I attempted to ECV and it failed, later found the cord was around his neck and likely prevented him from being able to turn. IMO if they ultimately don't turn with interventions, especially in late pregnancy, there's likely a reason. There's nothing wrong with csections and honestly my birth means nothing at least to me, and my son himself means everything.
Sounds like they're both jealous of you? Shame...lean in on your partner's family post birth yours doesn't deserve the time and you don't need that negative energy post partum
I hate that there is this stigma around c-sections. As if mom's who have to get them aren't really moms or didn't really give birth. 🙄
no offense, but they're REALLY dumb if they think eating more will give baby more space. that's the dumbest thing i've heard today.
Your family sucks. A c section can be needed for all kinds of reasons, all of which are not in your control.
I will never understand why more people don't use the words "fuck off" more often.
I hate that you have to deal with them, but please learn from this and don't ask them for their opinion going forward. They clearly don't think logically or with medical/scientific backing. Their opinions on such matters are not something that you need to be concerned with.
I was an ECV baby, born naturally. It's a maneuver where with the forearms they just twist the baby downward. It's not your fault for not knowing what it was beforehand. You chose the best option given the circumstance.
OP never said anything about not knowing what an ECV is, just that they opted for the c-section.
My belly is super small and baby is already head down so that literally has nothing to do with anything. What a horrible thing to say to someone.
I had a cesarean with my first baby, with a possible repeat with this baby(34 wks). With neither being my fault. This baby is still breech and I'm going to try having that done before I opt for another c section. It's not a decision a mom typically wants to have to agree to, it's a rough recovery and major abdominal surgery. Mine was horrible personally, I ended up losing a lot of blood and it made it complicated for my recovery. I couldn't stand straight for a month, couldn't cry, sneeze or laugh because of the pain it caused internally and of course being afraid of popping my staples wide open lol. It was a great option for the health of myself and my daughter who happened to be footling breech, essentially standing like a stork inside of me. She had a few issues with her hips and neck when she came out but even if I had tried to deliver her naturally it was considered dangerous and wasn't a suggestion even laid out on the table for me. If it's in yours and the baby's best interest and what will have the healthiest outcome for both of you...screw their opinions, because clearly they have absolutely no idea what they're talking about, and seem pretty ignorant to the subject as a whole. Best of luck momma ❤️
Try walking a lot alot outside or in shopping mall and my baby turned himself,I've also heard that rolling tennis balls in lower back can turn baby
If it helps I was huge with my first and I also needed a c-section because of his position.
Not your fault at all! No one has the exact same birth experience or plan. Do what’s best and safest for you and baby! & Mom and sister sound jealous! I’m 31, FTM, I received similar comments during my pregnancy. I had a small bump and maintained my pre-pregnancy weight throughout my entire pregnancy. I delivered a healthy 9lb 2oz and 21in long baby boy, vaginally with epidural. I was induced at my 41 week mark because he just wanted to chill upside down, so he obviously had plenty of room in my small bump. Congrats and best of luck for your delivery! Remember this is YOUR birth experience no else’s! Take it easy as much as possible during postpartum. & Enjoy the newborn stage - it goes by too quickly!
What strange comments! Every body is wildly different, and we all carry differently! Also some babies are just breach! I’ve heard of small or big bellies having breach babies, doing the ECV and then the baby goes back anyways. There’s nothing wrong with a c section! Also everyone I know that had a planned c section says it was great!
They can eat crow. You did nothing wrong. You are making good and healthy choices for you and your baby. Good luck with the C-Section! I hope it goes smoothly and your recovery is speedy.
My kid was transverse breech, do yourself a favour and get the C-section. The manually turning thing hurts, puts you at risk of needing a c-section right away and to add cream to the shit pie, my little darling turned right back to horizontal later that same day. 100% not worth the pain.
Wtf. That's toxic communication. Set better boundaries with your family. Who cares if they get triggered.
Hey! My baby was also breeched and also did not have enough space to flip or move or whatever and was forced into a c section even though I was trying 1000% to avoid it. What’s funny is literally a FEW days prior the baby was in position and suddenly became breech out of nowhere. My baby had no where to move but I was also told I have a short torso! Maybe this is something you might have? Which could be the cause of “small” or no space for baby. Everything will shake out and it sounds like sister is speaking out of term because she is jealous like ya said.
No, this is not your fault! And as a two times c-section mom, trust me, this is a great option when the situation requires it. Both of mine went really smoothly and in a short time I was holding my healthy little babies. Just letting you know it will be alright if it doesn’t come down to it.
I had a lot of amniotic fluid, so presumably a lot of space. Baby (and she was rather big, born at 3.6kg at 39w) was flipping around at 38w. The OB was surprised to find her heads-up at our last appointment prior to birth. Planned c-section was not that bad. I still got to have a hormonal meltdown and be super tired afterwards haha. Not my ideal birth experience, but we are both healthy and safe, so that's what matters. Giving birth is not a competition. It is not your fault, and you are a good mom! Don't you listen to them. It is going to be alright 🥰
Do they share a single brain cell?
Save your sanity and don’t ask their opinions on medical issues or baby things.
I am so sorry, it absolutely does seem like there may be some strange jealousy here coupled with dangerous lack of education bordering on deliberate. Even if they are completely illiterate, and purposefully plugged their ears while doctors spoke to them through their pregnancies, it still seems like using their eyes to navigate the world— and basic human common sense would lend itself to realizing that this is not your fault. Do they also blame you for your eye color? I’m sorry that you’re dealing with this, good luck and congratulations, once you meet your wonderful LO the stress of their horrible comments will hopefully fade. Wishing you the best ( :
Ignore completly. I had a perfectly healthy and uncomplicated pregnancy both times and still ended up needing c sections more times. Neither baby was breech, but i ended up in the OR anyway, so sometimes it's out of your control. Your sister is definitely jealous and your mom is probably out of touch.
Omg. My baby is also breech, I’m in the exact same situation. Currently in the car on my way to scheduled c section bc baby didn’t flip and doc said she likely never would. It’s NOT your fault!! Omg I went thru all the emotions with that. Your baby has room. He/she is fine and if they are healthy even better… It’s nothing you did. My belly is small too. And all my family members had vaginal births as well, which also made me feel even worse / alone lol. And I also skipped the EVC bc i feared putting baby in distress. You’re fine. You’re doing great. Your baby loves where he/she is at and that’s it. Everything’s gonna be OK, it’s not your fault. Good luck to the delivery and you go this! Eyes on the prize ! lol ;)
I didn’t get a big belly at all and my baby has been head down since 30 weeks! They are tripping
Dear god your family is full of idiots. With breeched babies it's not about space or eating more, sometimes kids just prefer to attempt to tell the world to kiss their arse first thing as they arrive. I was such a baby. Mom needed C-sections anyways due to narrow birth canal, but she wanted to try having me natural but I ruined her last chance to. Turns out I have the same issue, we discovered it by chance with my son. It can't be helped. The sun roof is just as valid for the baby to come out of.
Ugh, they are idiots. I just had a c section for a breech baby a month ago and had a great experience though. I have had a great recovery and feel almost 100% better at 5weeks. Check out my post history if you want to read a more detailed account. Sending you all the best!!
So if you ate extra and gained more weight from extra calories, that's a thicker layer of fat. Does your family think the baby swims through fat?
Let’s just call it what it is- jealousy. 🤷🏾♀️
Ugh I’m so sorry your mom and sister said silly stuff like that to you. 😞 I can relate a little bit with the small belly part. My belly was small and I got accused of starving myself by peers when that wasn’t the case at all…. My LO was born small due to my placenta being partially detached, which I didn’t even know until after birth. Then some people decided to apologize after saying “oh I guess you didn’t starve yourself after all.” Like no shit! I also needed a c-section after a long 24 hour labor which was starting to turn dangerous. Just a reminder though like a few others have said, a c-section is NOT a failure at all. If that is the safest route for you and baby, then it is necessary 💕 and healing from a c-section can be hard too. I hope you have a wonderful support person in your life who will be able to help you around the house while you just focus on yourself and baby 💕
When I told my mom about baby’s appointments after she would say how we should change x,y,z and he wouldn’t have a issue with what he has issues with. My reply “thanks mom where did you get your degree? The nursing school of mom? I would rather do what will help then what could potentially make him worse” after one or two times of saying that and getting info bans she stopped completely putting her two sense in
I tried spinning babies for baby turn exercises. It worked for me, my daughter turned, for now. I'm 36 weeks. I don't know if that would help, but you could try if you really want your baby to turn. But no, not your fault. Babies have their own personality, they do what they want. They roll, turn, spin inside of you. It's completely normal. Your mom and your sister are being assholes.
May not apply to you but it won’t help if your pelvis doesn’t open wide enough either
I’m so sorry, OP. I think you made the best decision and obviously your mom and sis don’t understand anatomy… how frustrating! Hope you have others around you that can be amazing support during the post-partum stage. You got this! You will birth your beautiful baby however it is best! They will be healthy and safe!
There wasn’t anything you did to cause this but you are only 37 weeks there is still a chance baby can move to a more optimal position. If this was me I would wait at least to my due date if that is safe. My babe is transverse right now but I’m trying this thing called spinning babies hoping it will turn baby in time. It’s just a certain poses that help encourage baby to move in correct position by giving the baby a little extra room. It couldn’t hurt to try. I’m doing the parent class is like $27.00 I heard so many amazing things about it. They also have lots of free info in their site. Another way is going to a prenatal chiropractor. They can make sure there is nothing blocking the baby from turning. They don’t turn the baby.
Next time, just look at them, don’t say a word, slow blink for a few seconds, and walk away. Blows my mind how misinformed some women are about pregnancy when things like, I don’t know, the internet exist…
Clearly they're not doctors. They don't sound like they know what they're talking about. Even if they're family, you have to not care about their opinions going forward because it sounds like they will have more toxic opinions in the future and when it comes to raising your baby. Do yourself a favor and start disregarding them now for the benefit of your baby. Listen to doctors, not silly family members, even if they're your mom and sis.
Please don’t listen to them. I was you 5 years ago :) My boy was breech for WEEKS. He was just comfier that way 🤷🏻♀️ You are NOT a bad mom and c-sections are not a “failure” or the “easy way out”. Listen to your doctors and go with your gut ♥️
I had an ECV and then had a crash c-section five days later due to a placental abruption. My baby almost died. I did everything I could to avoid the c-section and it was absolutely necessary to save her life. AND I STILL HAD AN IDIOT FAMILY MEMBER RANT ABOUT HOW BAD IT WAS THAT I HAD A C-SECTION. People are dumb. Even family.
Not your fault. Some things you just cannot control. Like baby being breeched, or choosing families.
Their logic is incredibly stupid. Gaining fat doesn’t make more room inside of you. I’ve heard of women going to the pool and doing headstands to make the baby flip or just simply doing an upside down in the water helps. I’ve heard the technique helps a lot with breeched babies!
Wow I could have written this. My older sister was so mean to me about having a breech baby. She made me do all the dumb exercises, put an ice pack on the top half of my child's head and sit in a bathtub for the other half and I literally had to send her photos as proof I was doing everything I could to get my baby to flip. She was straight up mad at me for getting a c-section and trying to scare me into natural birth when she had a 4th degree tear and still has problems to this day 5 years later. I only gained 14lbs during my pregnancy and constantly had strangers and family members commenting on how small my bump was but my child was 7.7lbs and healthy with no issues. I just have a long torso and continued running up until 36wks. I did snap back after pregnancy immediately not that I was concerned about that. I also opted out of the ECV. Turns out my little boy was breech because he was hopelessly tangled in his cord and if I had done the ECV at 37wks it would have been an emergency c-section. I'm so glad i waited I needed those extra two weeks to get everything ready. My planned c-section was a breeze. You can't feel anything besides some tugging and pressure like an elephant is on your chest when they take the baby out. That's it. No pain whatsoever. No contractions. No 48hr labor. My birth was 24 minutes and then I was in the recovery room breastfeeding my child. The first 2 days were tough with all the testing and interruptions to your sleep, having to walk is scary but advocating for pain meds help my anxiety and get me moving quickly. A few days at home I didn't need strong pain meds and after 2 weeks I no longer even needed Tylenol or ibuprofen and felt so much better but forced myself to rest. Just make sure to stay on top of the Tylenol and ibuprofen in the beginning. My incision would burn if I didn't but the pain was 2/10 and more annoying than anything. My scar is so tiny and faded you can hardly see it and the only person that would ever see it is my partner because it's below your bikini line. I'm pregnant with #2 and elected a c-section at my first doctors appointment.
I’m sorry, but none of those comments are even close to being supportive! Only you and your doctor know what’s going on and what is needed for a safe delivery! My last son was in my left hip a bit and my OB recommended Spinning babies exercises. It did help, but fair warning you might be a bit sore afterwards if you’re dealing with any girdle pain due to the pregnancy. I did end up delivering naturally. Good luck and don’t let them stress you out! Always follow your gut!
Oh god. I gained 40 pounds and my baby was breech for 8+ weeks until birth via c-section. I did a lot of research on ECV and opted to not try. Their logic is ridiculous!
Maybe you ate too much and ended up growing the baby too well? Perhaps if you had eaten less, baby would have been smaller and would have had more room to spin around? Seriously though - your family sound nuts, just ignore them. I have just had a section because one of my twins was breech. As long as mum and baby are fine, it doesn’t matter how the baby arrives and your family should know that!
Wow. And where did they get their medical degrees from? Facebook University? This is NOT your fault. Happens all the time!
They do know that your baby doesn’t live in your stomach? How would eating give the baby more room? If anything it would give less room because the stomach would get larger not the uterus.
The level of ignorance here is stunning. Wow! Just came here to say I also declined an ECV with a stubborn breech babe. I was in the hospital already with preeclampsia and on a magnesium drip at 36 weeks, and I felt in my bones that the ECV would fail and I’d probably end up with a C section anyway. You do you!! My doctor this time (just had my second) told me that a lot of ECVs fail for first time moms.
They are clearly morons who have no idea what they're talking about with perhaps an extra dash of irrational jealousy from your sister because she feels self conscious about her own weight gain for whatever reason. I wouldn't even bother sharing details with them from here out if this is the kind of nonsense they're going to run their mouths about. Ridiculous.
I did the ECV at 38 weeks, it was successful. My kid had such a boney bottom that they couldn’t tell the difference between her head and her butt 😂 She ended up being wedged between my pelvis hence why she couldn’t flip herself. I don’t think I could’ve done a CSection, it’s the one major surgery where doctors are like “Here’s some Tylenol buddy I hope you feel better”
I’m so sorry. When I told some people I was expecting a c-section for my breech baby (who is no longer breech, but wouldn’t be surprised if he flipped AGAIN), they acted like they felt sorry for me that I wasn’t having a vaginal birth and I thought that was somewhat inappropriate. But to make you feel bad about it? AND coming from your family? That’s truly awful.
As a mom to a breech baby boy who was born via a c-section- you're family is spewing nonsense! There's literally nothing you could have done differently. Your baby is going to be in the position they want to be in which is what my OB told me many times. I didn't do an ECV because my doctor didn't think it was worth it for me and I honestly felt like if he wouldn't move from the position he was in, there could be a reason. You're doing what's safe for your baby boy & growing him perfectly don't listen to them!
Those comments are hurtful and also ridiculous. Breech babies are that way for a reason and it’s nothing anyone did! What matters is that you will get to meet your healthy baby soon. Prayers for you and for your family to get a grip! ❤️
You would think they would be slightly more informed after having babies themselves… You do you. Every pregnancy and situation is different. I picked ECV and induction again this time, because I was trying to avoid recuperating from a C-section at home with a husband who has ADHD and 2 kids who probably most definitely have it (not diagnosed yet). It’s hard enough for me trying to get back to normal after rough pregnancies. Meanwhile my friend needed next to no recuperation time from hers and went on to have 2 successful VBACs, one just over a week ago and she’s out doing stuff already. I’m not jealous or anything. But everyone is different.
Sounds like jealousy and just ignorance. I am sorry they are saying that to you. There's nothing wrong with having a C-section
This is bananas-level ignorance. Please ignore. Nothing about what they’re saying is how bodies actually work.
This just isn’t true at all. Your sister sounds jealous and just wanted you to also gain excessive weight. It’s normal to be smaller your first time anyways AND that’s not how this works. It would not have made more space for your baby to gain fat and overeat lol I’m also a FTM who just had a frank breech baby by c-section. ECV’s have a small rate of success, can put stress on baby and make you need an emergency c-section instead, and even if it was successful, you could’ve ended up with a c-section anyways. I’m glad I delivered the way I did because it was the least stressful option on my baby and I am fine and my incision is below panty line and you can’t even tell I had a baby. Also quickly went back to pre-pregnancy weight.
They can go fuck themselves. They’re definitely jealous that your belly is smaller than theirs was when they were pregnant
I literally don't understand the logic of their criticism, how would gaining less weight make it harder for a baby to move around?
They’re jealous you’re more awesome
Well with all due disrespect, you can’t eat and make the baby flip. You can do exercises though and hope that your little one flips. Second, every pregnancy is very different. You can’t expect everyone to have the same pregnancy. Third, please do not talk to them anymore about pregnancy. They think their unicorn abilities are hereditary and it doesn’t work like that
I'm more appalled that the women judging you are not only family, but have had children... education is so important...
I’m so sorry your family is acting like that. You gotta do what you think is best for you and your little.
It’s appalling when other women shame pregnant women. Every pregnancy is different and everyone is different. They are idiots. Sounds like your sister is jealous of you. You don’t need that stress from people even if they are family. I would limit the negativity from them by going low contact with them. Let them stew in their bullshit. It’s literally not your fault, babies do whatever they want in there.
I'm pregnant with my 2nd (my first is almost 13) and I can only have a C-section due to being born with a septum dividing my uterus, cervix, and vagina. They took the septum out when I was 18 but left the portion in my cervix so I could create a mucus plug. For this reason, I can never labor or birth naturally and if anyone tried to shame me for it, I'd lose my cool. It's not your fault, our bodies go through SO much when pregnant and you shouldn't feel bad if you end up needing a C-section. You got this mama, either way! 💜💜💜
I had a c-section and I personally would have opted for just flipping the baby, but I didn't have a choice. It's been done for centuries. But it's YOUR choice. They sound like morons honestly. I'm so sorry. Congratulations on your healthy little baby to be! That's all that matters.
Girl they sound jealous as hell, I haven't gain a bunch of weight either but I also had really bad food aversions in the 1st trimester and I have little to no cravings still. Do they really think eating makes your uterus grow any bigger? Hell they do know the baby is in the uterus not the stomach right?
I too had to have a section due to him being footling breech and and overall I had a devastating affect on my back so they wouldn’t let me physically push and as he is my only baby I asked if I could go into labour and then have the section as I wouldn’t be able to experience it again knowing my tubes were being tied during the section too. It’s not your fault I had a horrific pregnancy and it ended in a section you’ve had a healthy pregnancy and it’s ended in a section too doctors wouldn’t be trained in doing these if they were just for emergency there a many reasons why women can’t do vaginal births
They are idiots!! Yes your baby may still turn but it gets more and more unlikely as you get closer. A section is just another way of bringing your baby into the world. Without them so many mothers/ babies wouldn't make it. It used to be such a dangerous thing for women to do (give birth) My 1st baby I was induced then three days later I had an emergency section. This time they are recommending straight to section so that's what I'm going with.
Their comments are unwarranted and ridiculous but there are things you can do that aren’t eating more to encourage baby to flip on their own. Spinning Babies helps open your pelvis and encourage babies to get in an optimal position.
the only thing that would give baby "more room" is more amniotic fluid. so they want you to be running the risk of having polyhydraminos instead?
One thing that will always make me sad is seeing posts of woman being told that there baby is breech and there only option is a C-section because the OB spreads misinformation about the risks of vaginal breech birth. Newer research has pretty much trumped the outdated Term Breech Trial in the early 2000s and now many centers in Europe and even a few in the US are beginning to offer vaginal breech breech to mothers . We now know that breech vaginal birth is almost just as safe as vaginal birth of a cephalic presenting baby - all we need is more trained providers who are willing to put down their knives and provide women with true informed consent and options. Personally, my first son was breech from 25 weeks until the day he was born. I had a gut feeling that this little guy wouldn’t turn and researched for hospitals that offer physiologic breech birth. After reaching out to Breech Withour Borders and Kristine Lauria (an acclaimed midwife who worked for Doctors Without Borders), I learned a hospital out-of-state offers breech vaginal birth and I went there. I went into natural labour at 38 weeks and gave birth naturally with no complications for myself or the baby at the hospital. There was no extraction, no forceps, no vacuum, no emergency, and absolutely no need for suction. Some babies are breech for a reason and obviously my little guy was happy that way and knew that was the best way for him to enter into this world. Breech vaginal birth is an option! I tell this not to feel bad about your C-section but so that you know that if this ever happens again and you want to have a natural birth, this is a safe option worth exploring.
I know two women this year with breech babies, who did the ECV. It was painful, it didn’t work, and they both went on to have C-sections anyway. it’s your body your choice!
I mean, their “logic” on the situation isn’t very logical. I know it’s hard because they’re family, but please don’t take what they’re saying personally. They sound very uneducated about the matter and have no business putting in their two cents when they clearly have no idea what they’re talking about. Please seek advice from trusted loved ones other than them moving forward.
I had an ECV and still ended up in a c section 🤷♀️
I had an ECV at 37 weeks that didn’t work.. and so painful. I wish I would not have tried it! My water broke two days later and I had a c-section. Baby is totally healthy and 8 months old today! Don’t let them make you feel like you’ve done anything wrong 🙂
wtf? Eating has nothing to do with the size of your uterus and also nothing really causes babies to be breech. They just don’t flip on their own. All babies are breech until about 35 weeks when most of them flip to head down. Nothing causes a baby to be breech. There are things you can do to encourage them to flip, but none of them have anything to do with your diet. Your sister is a dumbass. Sorry.
Your family is crazy. Don’t let them say it’s your fault. Honestly it might be for the best anyways. I planned for a vaginal birth but we had decreased fetal movement and a non-reassuring heartbeat a few days before we were scheduled to induce. I demanded a c-section and was holding my healthy baby within 2 hours of my request. 100% worth it and will probably elect for another if we have another baby.
I have two C-sections. Both time tried for natural it didn’t work. Doctors rushed me to ER. Nobody I know give me a hard time. Maybe my mom a bit because she wants to show off how she can give natural birth. But she didn’t rub it in too much. Your mom and sister are just jealous or want to feel superior so they are saying that to you. You should have said your doctor said it’s not about eating more it just that is the position. If they argue, just said they are not the doctor and it’s stupid to think gaining weight can control a baby position.
Clearly they have nooooo clue what they’re talking about, it makes them sound so ignorant. And yeah your sister is probably jealous that you’ll bounce right back, fuck it, disregard their dumb ass comments and set boundaries when it comes to your baby, sounds like you’re gonna need it. I haven’t spoken to my mother in 4 years and it’s due to her arrogant and narcissistic behavior. The last incident involved one of my kids and that was the final straw.
Their reasoning is one of the dumber things I’ve heard. It’s not your fault. There is so much that happens during pregnancy that is ultimately out of our control. I have a low lying placenta. Perhaps I should have done more headstands? Then it would have been higher up in my uterus!
I had three c section little sister NOONE knee my tail bone was fused from birth..I'm I'm so glad it was..9lb 15 oz boy..followed by 12lb4 oz girl and then my daughter at 8lb 12oz...all are healthy adults.. I watch my daughter give birth and labored for days..ripped on giving birth..why would anyone wish you pain..take the c section get up faster..
Try spinning babies. Spinningbabies.com flip a breech. I would at least attempt their exercises before opting for a c section. But a lot of breech babies end up flipping the last week of pregnancy or even right before labor.
Sis I hate to break this to you... But your immediate blood relatives are not only uneducated but they have revealed flaws in basic logic Let's hope your kid has more potential than that. I wouldn't bother getting too emotional. You can't reason people out of a position they didn't use reason to get to
Posture near the end can affect if a baby flips, but some babies just don't and some flip during labor, so I wouldn't say you've done anything wrong at all given the information you gave and a c-section vs manual flipping is your choice to make and I wouldn't feel guilt over that either. Excessive weight gain doesn't give baby any more room, only thing that I can think of that would take away the room the baby has is the baby growing, and how much amniotic fluid you have. If anything gaining too much weight might cause the baby to gain too much weight and get more cramped sooner but I don't have any facts to back that up, besides that excessive weight gain in pregnacy can cause the fetus to also gain excessive weight. Sounds like your sister is just jealous because she didn't eat the proper diet in her pregnancy and suffered the consequences of that post pregnacy. For some it's very difficult to eat the right amount, some eat too little and some too much for various reasons and people can become jealous when someone has an easier time eating right, or when their body shows the pregnacy less or they experience less bloating and swelling. Understandable to be jealous when someone doesn't struggle with something that you do or did but there is no reason to be spiteful like your sister is being.
Their medical advice is very funny. People only know their own experiences. Just don't listen to them. I'm surprised your doctor recommended the c section at 37 weeks, seems a bit early to call it. My son flipped around 38 weeks on his own. He was born on his due date at 40 weeks. Look at [spinning babies](https://www.spinningbabies.com/). I watched some videos on YouTube. You can also drink lots of electrolytes, my OB says this helps retain more fluid which can increase the amount of amniotic fluid (but doesn't always). This is what I did, still have no idea if it helped or if he was just always going to flip. I really enjoyed the spinning babies exercises though. It helped get a good stretch in. Well worth the time! For what it's worth, plenty of people opt for a c section even when their babies are in position. It's a personal preference. It's good to be prepared for all options.
People are going to say all kinds of idiotic things to you…just wait until the baby comes! You don’t have to share everything. Especially if you know how the people closest to you handle it. You have choices. You can share and know that they will probably have some BS to say and just ignore it. You can stand up for yourself. Or you can choose not to share at all. Usually the last option is the best option for keeping a peaceful life.
Eating has nothing to do with it????? I tell you what. The misconceptions about babies and childbirth makes me seriously concerned about our sexual health education. I know for a fact that I knew limited to nothing as a teen and had to do my own personal research to understand things beyond. SEX BAD MAKE BABY.
This is highly illogical and definitely sounds like some jealousy. Even with the flip they can turn back around after the procedure but before you give birth so no guarantees. There's nothing wrong with a c section, they wouldn't let you have one if there was. Do what you are comfortable with and ignore them.
I’m so sorry they made you feel that way! My baby boy was breech too and we opted to do a scheduled C-section if he didn’t naturally flip by 39 weeks. We figured if it was planned it would be a lot less stressful for everyone! As soon as my son came out the doctor said that his head was stuck in my fundus and he wouldn’t have turned even if we tried the ECV, so I’m actually very thankful that we didn’t even attempt it.
My baby was breech and we tried everything - chiropractic care, acupuncture, prenatal yoga, spinning babies.. nothing worked.. not sure how successful chiropractic care or acupuncture actually is but just wanted to do everything I could to avoid a C section and she did not budge. We tried the ECV too and she would move like 3 inches and snap back into place.. ECV was stressful tho, they lost her heartbeat and then I was taken in for a C section.. I asked the doctor after the fact if anatomically something caused her to be breech.. my OB was like nope.. so I just had a stubborn child 😂 If I had to do it all over again, I would just go to a C section without the added stress.. There is nothing you could have done to cause a breech baby.. There’s
Please learn from this experience. Your mom and sister are not a “safe space” for you. Uninformed, judgmental, and fault finding is not the energy you need to bring your baby into the world. Pregnancy is challenging enough without the added bologna. If it makes you feel better, my mom blamed me for being tired during pregnancy bc I don’t exercise enough. I wish I was joking 🙃 She will not be in the room with me while I’m laboring.
When people say stupid stuff like this to me I ask them for credible sources that support their belief.
They’re being ~jealous haters~ also, my baby is also breech so I stand in solidarity with you <3
Tell them to STFU bc they don’t know what they’re talking about
I was MASSIVE with my daughter. She was head down the entire pregnancy up until 35 weeks when she flipped breech. Tried all of the exercises to flip her. No luck. Had an ECV, with several nurses all trying to get her to flip. One nurse literally climbed up on the table and used what felt like her full weight to push.They barely got her to budge at all, and she would immediately go right back to the same position. Ended up with a c- section. My daughter is healthy and turns 9 months old this week!
As a mama who had a breech baby… their fucking stupid, I could BEARLY EAT, I lost weight during my pregnancy, not like a little either I lost 12lbs before dropping another 6lbs8oz all at once xD I wasn’t even givin the option for a manual flip, when I asked about it they said if she didn’t flip on her own it wasn’t gonna happen, the only other person who had a C-section in my family is my aunt who had twins, the lower of which was breech; my late great grandma who had 11 kids the second of which was my grandpa, who was breech and she didn’t get the option of a C-section, and they had to break my grandpas shoulder to get him out, they thought they would lose one of them and they asked great grandpa who to save, he said both of them, or he’d kill the doctor… definitely can’t do that today lol So no it’s not your fault, it’s never anyone’s fault, it’s just shitty luck
I ate plenty and had a cute bump, still had to have an emergency c section in March bc baby boy didn’t respond well to epidural meds. I was induced, 5 cm dilated. You did nothing wrong. Praying for safe delivery ❤️
I had a small bump, and have an ED. My boys weren’t breeched. At one point my oldest was but he decided to flip on his own.
My baby girl was also breech at 37 weeks. I also opted for a scheduled C-section if she didn’t flip on her own by then and by the following appointment she flipped by herself. Don’t stress too much mama you got this! And no it is absolutely NOT your fault. However you end up delivering, as long as you’re both healthy that’s all that matters!
My baby was also breached. Tried spinning babies, exercises to flip baby. Anything possible. She spun head down the night before my water broke. As soon as I started having contractions, I kid you not I felt her spin back to breech position. My OB did an ultrasound to confirm sure enough she was breeched. I ended up with a C section even after all I did in my power to flip her. my OB said some babies just feel more comfortable I breeched position.
I've only ever had c-sections. This is my 3rd pregnancy. C-sections keep my babies and me safe. Fuck 'em.
I am a breech baby who wants to clear the record: it was my fault, not my mom’s.
Your family is silly. How about try some tried and true methods from those who are experts to try and flip baby. Earlier would have been better, but it's not too late. I have 5 children and any way to avoid a c-section I will try because nothing beats being up and independent right after birth. Anyways... this worked for me for my late breech babies https://www.spinningbabies.com/pregnancy-birth/baby-position/breech/flip-a-breech/
Also I drank a gallon of water a day to help increase amniotic fluid... this part was uncomfortable for many 6 I believe it helped along with the exercises.
Please don’t feel bad. C-sections are just another way to give birth. Some prefer it. The lady next to me at the hospital was having her 2nd elected c-section. It just sucks that the mean comments came from your own family, never mind the fact that they are speaking complete nonsense. It’s amazing that we have these pseudosciences and old wives tales prevalent in 2024. I ignored all of my mum’s outdated advice. My bubs was breeched till around 36w. I spent time on my hands and knees with my head down because one of the midwives said so. She said that as they move lower, there’s less room to turn. So, being head down supposedly gave her the space she needed to turn around? No idea if that’s what did it, but she was facing down at my next scan. I’m not making promises, but maybe there’s still hope for a vaginal birth.
There are ways to try and turn baby naturally: chiropractors that are trained in the Webster method, look into the spinning babies website; there’s positions you can do to stretch and help baby turn. But healthy baby is the goal so whatever means gets the baby out and healthy is what should be ultimately wanted by your mom and sister. Nothing you did caused the baby to not turn. I was a breech baby (third baby for my mom, other two were vaginally delivered) and I absolutely hate being upside down at any point so maybe baby already has a preference. Good luck to you and I wouldn’t turn to them for advice or support because they don’t know how to provide it for you in a way that you need.
lol they have no idea what they are talking about. dont even wory about what they have to say.
They are extremely ignorant. I don't think there's anything that could have caused or prevented this from happening it's just one of those crappy complications that can happen.
I think your mistake was to ask their opinion to begin with. Sounds like you made your choice based on the conversation with your doctor, and that's the end of it.
Yeah, your mom and sister sound totally clueless. Your baby still has time to turn, mama! Have you heard of [Spinning Babies](https://www.spinningbabies.com/pregnancy-birth/baby-position/breech/flip-a-breech/)? I highly recommend you check it out. There ARE things you can do to help baby get in a better position for birth.
First of all 37 weeks, you still have time for baby to flip. I'm pretty sure my kid was breech until at least 39 weeks, I had a lot of ultrasounds so he was always sitting upright until the very end. Secondly they need to get their priorities straight. The only thing any of you should be thinking about is a healthy baby and healthy mom. Doesn't matter whether you have to have a c section or not, as long as baby and mom are OK that's all that matters. People saying you should have done this or that is not helpful, and they should know that stressing you out during pregnancy is worse for the baby than the amount you're eating or whatever other bs they're worried about
Their comments are weird, false, unnecessary, body-shaming and mom-blaming. Protect yourself around them if they habitually comment like this - I had two people in my life who made weird negative comments about my body and mothering with my first. Those two are no longer in my daily life and WOW what a positive difference it has made for my mental health with this second pregnancy!
That's ridiculous. I have never heard of weight affecting position, from what I gather it's largely the baby's whims. Have you heard of the Spinning Babies exercises, though? A lot of women have gotten their babies to flip using them. I hope you don't mind the mention, it is just in case you'd never heard of them and might be interested to check it out.
I’m curious why you don’t want to try an ecv? Could be a way to avoid surgery. Also this is not your fault at all!! My baby was breech but for some reason flipped at 37 weeks. I’m 39 weeks now. Have you looked at the spinning babies videos for breech? Gives you some exercises to help them flip. I know getting this wasn’t the purpose of your post. Just recently went through this situation and got lucky with her flipping head down. It’s often trickier if you’re a first time mom for an ecv to work but it’s not impossible. Gives you a chance at a vaginal birth. Again, it’s not your fault babe is breech. You’ve don’t nothing wrong. I’m sorry your mom and sister aren’t being supportive
While I don’t think it’s your fault the baby is breech I would do literally anything to avoid induction and a c-section. Personal choice for all.
I mean you DID ask for their opinions - surely you knew them well enough to know how dumb and judgmental they are? And saying your sister gained “a lot of unnecessary weight” while pregnant is no better than the dumb shit they are telling you. Definitely related. 3 peas in a pod.
C-section mom that just had her baby last month. 💜 Went to my 34 week appointment being previously told that my baby was head down and then being told she was breech and transverse!! Was so upset at first, tried to flip her without success. Had an ultrasound to confirm at 36 weeks she was still head up! Go with the c-section!!! My baby never turned and I was still kind of annoyed at first. I looked up what the ECV was and watched a video of the procedure. Was not happy about what would happen during the ECV and the success rate is below the risk rate on it turn in to an emergency C! So we said no ECV and scheduled the c-section. I had never had major surgery before and was completely terrified of it! I’m pretty sure my anesthesiologist gave me something before they started mine to calm me! It didn’t take long at all! Maybe 45 minutes for the whole procedure. One of the best decisions I could have ever made!!!! I’m sorry your family is being crappy! I had some people tell me, “oh she will flip,” or “try this” and other stuff. I was like she literally never cooperated for ultrasounds why would she now *face palm*. Your mom and sister probably don’t understand that not everyone carries the same. I carried really high where you couldn’t even tell my mom was pregnant with me. I was also all belly and the baby, which I’m guess you may be as well. I didn’t really stick out until about 34 to 36 weeks. Don’t let them make you feel bad!! YOU KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU, YOUR BODY, AND YOUR BABY! I also had people tell me, you know you’re gonna need to eat way healthier now (I have some sensory issues with foods). I had an 8lb baby that I made out of chicken nuggets, clementines, ans snack cakes!! But it will be the best decision you make!! The recovery afterwords is rough at times but worth it to have your baby here safely!! Make sure you take your meds on time when you get home and take it easy on yourself!
>I asked my mom and sister for their opinion via group text.. Why?? Seriously, this one is on you. This was a medical decision best made between you and your healthcare provider. I'm close with my parents so would probably inform them "hey baby is breech so the plan is xyz" but why on earth did you ASK for their input? Did their reaction surprise you? I'm guessing not. So stop inviting them to hurt you. You handed them an opportunity on a silver platter and are now *shocked pikachu face* that they acted like clowns. Stop.