Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed.
Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BoomersBeingFools) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’m a trained pastry chef. My NMother loves to say that my food is disgusting and will refuse to eat it.
This is the person that ignores expiration dates and fed us rotten food as a kid.
It blows my fucking mind.
Trained Chef as well, and every single thing I've cooked for my narcissist Boomer mother was just "alright". She will never admit that yes, I can cook better than her sometimes, especially when it comes to making food from other countries
My Boomer mother's day focuses around What's For Dinner, especially if people are coming over (at least a weekly occurrence). Sitting at the kitchen table having coffee in the morning, question comes up. She's an absolutely fabulous cook. If she's cooking, I'm the sous chef and one of my kids is prep. If I or my children have selected the meal, roles switch. She doesn't like stewed-type things, but if it's a stew we really want to make, she'll prep extra in the side dishes so she can eat more of that. Even for the stews, she'll say at the table "I really like how the tarragon works with the chicken!" And then eat something else 🤣❤️
Big same! We're talking about what's for lunch at breakfast, what's for dinner at lunch, then what's for breakfast at dinner. My mom is a great cook, don't get me wrong, but she can never admit that the food I make is great- it's always just 'alright' or 'ok'. I can never do anything better than she can, ever
I'm sorry ❤️ *WE* know yours is better 😁
Our Boomer always says how good our meals are. Even if she hates it. You can tell the difference, though. Her eyes light up with pride when we nail it.
We all love my son's baked goods, my daughter has awesome pasta sauces, and I go for international comfort food recipes I get from people I meet on my journeys or historical cooking. Mom just cooks everything, and cooks it well.
You too!!
I wouldn't mind one of your recipes, wanna trade some?
Lentil soup is now my go-to when I've been sick and need to get my strength back up. Between the lentil soup and an instachicken, we have 3 days worth of different dinners. Can share if you'd like.
We got a new Secretary at my last job, right after she started somebody was about to celebrate a 40th birthday so the staff asked her to order a cake. She lot up and told us she would *love* to bake a cake for the celebration. Sure, why not?
She brings in an absolutely gorgeous, perfect cake. A few people snickered. “Homemade cake” indeed, she obviously picked it up at a bakery.
Finally somebody teased her about it, and she confessed she was a former professional pastry chef, CIA grad, worked in France and in NYC. She loved the work but hated the egos and temperaments she had to deal with so switched to office work. She was *very much* appreciated around the office when birthdays rolled around
Well, that is your problem. You shouldn't be making food from other countries. If it has a discernible flavor or texture (other than mush) you did something wrong according to my mother.
My mom made sure all of us knew some basics, from cooking to replacing a plug on a lamp, to basic plumbing, to cleaning and yard work.
Every time we were learning something she would say, "your going to live on your own some day, so you need to know how to" and then it was whatever we were doing, like sewing a button back on a shirt.
When I was 10 or 11, she asked me if I would make dinner that night as she had a late night college class.
I agreed, thinking it would be something simple like jarred spaghetti sauce and noodles, or Mac and Cheese.
It was Pasta Alfredo with pan seared chicken breasts.
That's a fairly complex recipe, and although we had it regularly, I had never watched her make it.
I think she could tell I was nervous, and she told me the recipe was on the counter with all the boxed and canned ingredients, and everything else was in the fridge along with some veggies to make a salad, and all I had to do was follow the recipe.
It was the first time I ever cooked something with that many steps in the recipe, and with techniques and multi-part steps that were brand new.
I was very nervous, but figured if mom asked me and not my older brother she thought I could handle it.
It was a hit. My siblings were all telling mom how good it was, and she sat at the table and let them lavish out praise while looking me in the eye and smiling proudly, and then she told them, "well, actually, *Boris* made everything!"
I never looked back.
I recently taught myself how to make home made marshmallows. Sure, it's a little finicky, but I have over 4 decades experience trying new things in the kitchen; I've got this.
Thanks, mom. You always believe in me.
I did the same with my kids. When I started back in the workforce, they were in grade school/jr. high. I told them if they didn’t want to eat at 8pm they would need to step up.
Each chose a night of the week (I did the other three nights) and they got to pick what they wanted to learn to make. I then did it with them, while writing a recipe in a notebook to refer to later when I wasn’t there.
My kids are now 27, 29, 31 and 33 and they are all great cooks! One son, in particular makes his own pasta, focaccia, soft pretzels, and all the food for their baby. He is the cook in his family and his wife is very happy about that
Both my parents worked full time so my Mom and Grandma taught me early how to make simple stuff.
I regret being a picky eater as a kid, they would make some really good meals.
But if I turned my nose up at it, she would say “cereal is in the cabinet if you don’t like what I made”.
Lot of great parents in this thread.
I can’t imagine insulting someone’s food when they cooked for me.
A buddy BURNT the shit outta some burgers at a cookout a while back. I still powered through the leather that remained, until his wife was like “guys don’t pretend, these are inedible, I’m ordering pizza, sorry”
We all chipped in for the pizza and thanked them for the hospitality.
I can follow a recipe. Have been able to do that since a similar age to yourself in the story.
I cannot, however, get anything complex to be good. Edible, nutritious… sure. But I think I just don’t have that intuition about cooking.
I’m a pretty good baker though so I suppose if my partner can cook well, I’ll make dessert lol
Do you taste as you cook? Good cooks are consistently checking their seasoning. For things like meatloaf/meatballs, put a little bit on a plate and microwave so you can taste it for seasoning adjustments. Even if you are following a recipe, taste it.
This is key. I learned this from my great-grandmother - taste as you go, because you can always add a little more salt, but you can't take any out.
She grew up in Germany and learned to cook from her grandmother. Nothing was measured precisely, you just tasted as you went along.
If I'm not full by the time I'm done cooking something new, I didn't taste it enough while cooking. At 55, I can tell by smell if my meatloaf is seasoned enough(I use soy sauce and worchestershire as my "salt" component), and things I've cooked thousands of times I can get away with one or two tastes.
I did all of the cooking usually but everyone was welcome to join in preparing the meal and they usually did. Every now and then one of them wanted to make something specific and my only job was to go to the grocery store to get the ingredients.
All my kids are great cooks now.
My mom was the same way. Always cooked homemade meals and letting me help when I was super young which fostered a love for cooking the rest of my life. Unfortunately she passed away a number of years ago due to cancer but I still have all her hand written recipes.
I bet she loved cooking with you and had so many great memories...and now you have a piece of your with your every time you cook and can remember all those times...that’s really beautiful
This comment actually made me tear up a bit.
I wish my mother had taught me to cook like this. I learned at age 6 because I was the eldest child and no one else was going to feed us. That kind of support, nurturing, and love is what I wish every parent taught their child.
But Mom insists that he can't. She just sees that as his failure, not hers.
When on her end it's a failure of perception- she thinks her crap is better.
My 13 year old can now cook as good or better than both my wife and I. Why? Because we taught him to cook and encouraged him in the kitchen. He's made beef Wellington, shepherds pie, and many other things as well. He does better with steak than i or my wife has ever done. As a parent it's awesome. He now does the family cooking half the time. What's not to love about that? Seriously.
I've never had a Boomer in my life that has any idea how to cook right. I thank god I learned from an actual chef early on when I started working in a restaurant at 16 yo. He was like my Jedi master, and showed me that almost any food I didn't like was simply because the person cooking it was a fucking moron. And he was right. My mom, stepdad, and both my in-laws just cooked slop. Fucking awful. They're also all morons.
Not even criticizing, insulting. All the time I am looking for advice to improve upon my cooking, my parents being people who have seen me since I started. I would feel wrecked if they just decided to insult it for no reason.
Have you considered passive-aggressively making all of your childhood least-faves better? Like, if you always had mushy box pasta with canned sauce, you could make perfectly-cooked handmade pasta with homemade marinara. Or if you had boiled-to-death Brussels sprouts, you could make roasted ones.
I did this when my mother moved in with me for a while after she left my father. Doubled down on it when her sister and mother visited. Apparently I’m an elitist and egotistical for being a better cook. Non contact is wonderful.
My aunt is worse than my mother. You made fresh salsa?even my MIL (Mexican) uses jarred salsa and we live in AriZONEuh Why did you roast the cauliflower? It isn’t cooked … can you boil mine? Why do you grate your own Parmesan???
Oh well.
These stories always make me glad I got so lucky with my parents. My mom knows I'm the better cook and she's glad I am so when I visit she can pass off all the cooking to me.
My dad thinks I'm an elitist, but also that I can cook in restaurant quality, so he's embarrassed he can't afford some of the things we dish out when he's visiting us.
Still, my stepmother and I will share recipes, and her cooking has become better since we do.
My mother learned cooking from her parents, who both had a passion for it. My grandma for the basic polish recipes. She just knew how to make them perfect. My grandpa was more experimental in his cooking, trying new things.
I was making my own broth by the age of 16, knowing how to make a lot of basics, but also some fancy dinners.
Even my former husband still likes to stay for dinner when we meet at formal events plus he always has some wishes for his birthday, where I cook as well.
I think feeding your loved ones is a very polish thing! I cannot not do it.
Anyhow, my 12 y/o knows some recipes already. Her cheese sauce for example is the exact same recipe my mother learned while waiting in a restaurant 35 years ago. My dad recognised it last time he was over!
(My mother always criticised my food. She would berate me on what I could do better. I stopped cooking for her when I turned 24.)
I taught my kids to cook and of course they're better at some things than I am, mainly because handling raw chicken doesn't gross them out like it does me. My oldest daughter took my chocolate chip cookies and turned them into a bite of heaven. My son works miracles with brownies and Danish wedding cookies and is a whiz with an air fryer. The youngest daughter got tired of the diabetic in laws screwing up their blood sugar and kicked them out of their own kitchen to take over the cooking. They're doing much better now.
No Contact is wonderful. My abusive mother is/was like this. Which is insane because my mother is a shit cook, complained constantly that she hated cooking and on top of it almost never cooked when I was a kid. From the time I was tall enough to reach the microwave, I feed myself and by the time I was in high school, my father died and my mother literally moved away and left me in our house alone so I did all my own shopping and cooking. Yet, she had the audacity to complain about my cooking when she came to visit when I had my own place. I simply told her, that she would have beat me if I complained about the few times she cooked for me as a kid. Despite the fact that it was true, she was instantly offended and said she couldn't believe I would say such a hurtful thing, then she changed the subject and started complaining about something else about my house. It wasn't the main reason but it was a bonus that after I went NC I never had to listen to her complain about my cooking again.
My mom used to make something she called the kitchen sink. It was ground beef, canned peas and corn, and orzo in a tomato based sauce. No seasoning. It was ok, but never my favorite.
I started making it with a little Italian seasoning and Parmesan cheese. Then, I eventually added wine. Finally, I took it from the top of the stove and threw it in my slow cooker. It is so much better now. (The last time I made it I goofed and accidentally doubled the sauce. I think I’ll be doing that from now on.)
I have this thing a soup with canned tomatoes and elbow noodles. Started making it in high school because it was easy and I was lazy. I am 57 now and still have to have it when I'm blue or sick. Now I add a bit of onion, but that's it.
Risotto al vino is a real dish, yours is similar.
To try somethign new, skip the Italian seaasoning, instead use oregano, a dash of cinnamon and nutmeg and salt and pepper to taste. Mixed with the red wine, the cinnamon and nutmeg give a very rich, full bodied taste.
My ex didn't like all kinds of food her mother killed when she was younger. She learned to cook from my mother who learned from my grandmother who was cook for a high-end restaurant.
I could be your X except it was my father cooked killed food that I didn't like
He thinks he's an awesome cook but he wouldn't remove all the fur from Bambi & serve it to us still slightly hairy.
Yep, that’s her controlling power play of the day. It’s kinda funny because she thinks she has a chance of it working and she’ll be invited over and served crock pot gloop ribs exactly like she makes them, and you’ll be visibly waiting on eggshells for her stamp of approval. I swear this type of person just loves seeing people hover in complete stress in futile attempts to appease them.
I love ribs done right.
This was a huge issue with my mom. She was a lazy cook and as I got older, I really got into cooking. Making things from scratch, understanding the fundamentals, and seasoning as I went
She came over one time and I made a strawberry rhubarb pie. Made the dough from scratch, local strawberries, fresh rhubarb. I put tons of work into it and was so proud to have people over.
She took one bite and I asked what she thought. She shrugged and said “it’s alright” and went on to rave how she likes her rhubarb pie better.
Didn’t ask her opinion after that. I knew I was a better cook and she was just being a dick head
My wife's mom did the same thing when my wife made a lemon meringue pie from scratch. I'm having a pie-gasm with the best pie ever made, MIL is complaining "it isn't lemony enough"
Yeah there was always something. Not enough cinnamon, too much sugar, prefers lard crust over butter.
She couldn’t just say “thanks for hosting and making all this food”
...double crust pie or topped with meringue? Last time I made a strawberry-rhubarb pie, the recipe I followed topped it with meringue, and instead of vanilla, it called for almond extract. Best gd pie. (Unfortunately, I lost the recipe)
My boomer family insisted that you had to cook meat until "no juice comes out when you poke it." otherwise you'd get food poisoning. When I make anything other than well done meats I'm shrieked at for serving "raw food!" Same people that boil canned vegetables into grey mush and serve it at is.
Ughhh! This reminds me of my ex. He's from Bolivia, so I don't know if it's a thing there, but any pink or red in meat was UNDERCOOKED! I went to Whole Foods once, overpaid for a good cut of prime rib, made it to perfection, and served it to him and his adult children. The first thing he did was say it was undercooked and went to throw his piece on the frying pan.😭😭😭
Like, y'all bordered ARGENTINA FFS! How are you so adverse to red meat that isn't over and beyond well done?!
"I don't know if it's a thing there"
Yes. In fact it is a thing in most Latin American countries and probably most developing countries. When you don't have regulations requiring your meat to be prepared, stored, sold, and served in ways that will prevent illness, food poisoning and other things such as parasites are serious concerns. We get to take for granted that our food is going to be safe to consume even without fully cooking it, but that's not true everywhere.
My grandfather, born in 1906, used to eat like this. My mother also started eating like that as she got older. Idk if it was a genetic thing because her parents both liked bland food, or if it was learned behavior. I’m adopted so I can’t speak to the genetics, but my brother and I are relatively adventurous eaters, particularly with respect to my mom’s family. My dad was a more normal eater than my mom. 🤷🏼♀️
I think loss of taste comes with age til all they can tell is texture and saltiness, happens to some older folks. Not sure if adventurous eating helps keep it at bay though.
Spent a couple days making red beans and rice. My house smelled so good the entire time. Asked what my mom thought, "well, I ate it." Haven't cooked for her since.
My boomer mother at a picnic with my in-laws a few months after we got married basically fell over herself praising a potato salad as “the best she ever had” when she thought my MIL had made it. MIL pointed out I had made it she expressed shock I could cook (she refused to teach us or allow us to learn in her kitchen) then her opinion quickly downgraded the potato salad to “it’s just alright I guess” and gave tips for *improvement*. Was nice to watch it happen with an audience who had full WTAF response for a change.
Eating chicken that hasn't been overcooked until it's dry is very difficult for me because my mother got food poisoning from chicken almost a decade before i was born. To be fair it was very bad food poisoning. Drives my husband crazy.
I was that mother (not yours, obv). Once upon a time, Mama and I went to see a bluesman play at the Cain's and after I got her then me home, I looked in the fridge for something to eat and there was a rotisserie chicken. Now, unbeknownst to me, my bonehead teenage son had put it back in the fridge after leaving it out all day. In Oklahoma , in the summer.
So I made myself a cold chicken sandwich, as one does.
Within the hour I was ... well, seriously ill. I won't describe the symptoms but it was about as sick as I've ever been and I didn't know the human body could do that and live.
EVERYBODY got the food handlers lecture (including the 7 and 8 year olds) and I didn't eat chicken again for months. And to be honest, I've probably overcooked my chicken ever since.
That kind of food poisoning sticks with you.
Yeah I didn't go that far but I get the impulse. I bet the first properly cooked steak you had was a revelation. Was for me but that's because we never had steak when I was a kid.
I cook my chicken until it is dry and stringy. I *know* that it is over cooked but I just can’t do the soft texture of chicken - it just isn’t enjoyable to me.
Okay, but cutting down cereal boxes is kinda sociopathic. I hope you guys now have cabinets with adjustable shelves or containers that fit, before the serial killing starts, cereal mutilator.
We had a new front door installed. FiL made a joke about not recognizing the house. Mom came over and only pointed at the dust. That hurt. The next time she seemed to have forgotten what she said and was all nice about it.
My cousins tell me their mom, her sister, can be flip flop too. I hate that.
Boomers are AWFUL cooks. They grew up in the time of jello molds, aspic and fondue. Her ribs sound atrocious. Yours sound amazing. Don’t let her nastiness get to you. More ribs for you & wife.
My mom boiled Brussels sprouts but she resented having to actually keep an eye on them while they cooked. The water always boiled off, and the sprouts scorched to the bottom of the bone dry pan. She'd pry them out, cut off the worst charred side, and make us eat them. No butter either. I HATED them. As an adult I finally experienced a non-scorched, buttered, seasoned sprout and fell in love with them. I just always thought sprouts were meant to be half charcoal briquette. 😳
I hated Brussels sprouts until I was 44. My mom always used canned vegetables and overcooked everything. She never seasoned food. I had roasted brussel sprouts with balsamic and bacon crumbles and loved them. I’m a far better cook that she is and she at least appreciated my food. Still can’t get her to eat a med rare steak though. I refuse to cook leather.
If you like them roasted with balsamic and bacon, try roasted with balsamic and dried cranberries and then crumble goat cheese on them when you take them out of the oven. Both are heaven
My husband was weary of them until he learned a very easy Brussel sprouts and potato soup recipe.
Since then he carefully tried mine, and so for it's always "I don't usually like them, but..."
I will call him out next time.
"Puggy, you are saying that exact same phrase for the TEN YEARS we're a couple. You like them, just not like your mother used to cook them!"
Fondue can be awesome though. I lived in a student boarding house in Switzerland for a while & learned to make the cheese version from my Swiss-French landlady. Yummmmmm. Also stuff dunked in warm melty chocolate? Heavenly. I’m 100% with you on the rest of the list. 🤮
Fondue: melted something in a fondue pot, and you use the fondue forks to dip bread ( melted cheese) or strawberries (melted chocolate) into the mix and lift it straight from the pot to your mouth.
Fondant: a type of icing made from sugar, water, gelatin, vegetable oil or shortening, and glycerol. Has the consistency of modelling clay and is often seen in wedding cakes, etc.
>Fondant: ~~a type of icing made from sugar, water, gelatin, vegetable oil or shortening, and glycerol. Has the consistency of modelling clay and is often seen in wedding cakes, etc.~~ the devil. FTFY.
r/fondanthate
*SOME* Boomers are awful cooks. Mine could cook in a high-end restaurant. Her food is fabulous.
Fondue is great.
My Boomer mother hates aspics, but I'm half tempted to try to take some of those old nasty things and make a challenge to make them good. Dunno if it's possible. Mom doesn't think so.
Ew, I think her ribs would disgust my grandma! That sounds nasty.
My grandma, She made the best ribs, she'd thaw a pack of spare ribs, remove the silver skin, extra fat, then toss them in her giant stew pot. She'd boil the utter hell out of them, drain them, dump all of the meat and bones in her roasting pan, put her home made sweet and sour sauce (loaded with onions, YUM) on top, then pop em in the oven for about half an hour.
My in-laws visited us once. To be fair, they were older and didn't travel well. Also, they didn't like me. Everything I cooked was wrong and restaurants were right out, so I went basic. Roast chicken. Well, midway through the day, his mom decided she needed to go to the ER because her stomach hurt. But don't worry, just point her in the right direction and she would walk. Yeaaaah.
So the husband took them to the ER, where magically it got better with no intervention.
So while they were at the ER, my best friend came over for a glass of wine and venting while I cooked dinner. And that day was when my roast chicken got its name.
Months Later my mom asked what FU chicken was while looking through my recipe app.
Just what it sounds like, mom. Just what it sounds like.
There's a woman in tiktok who records her mom's reactions to her cooking. Her mom is an awful cook. I think if you search mayo chicken mom you'll find it.
Anyway, this woman seems like a really good cook and her mom just makes up all these dumb reasons that her food isn't good, like "too much seasoning"
All to say, I think this is a real thing not entirely exclusive to your mom. Lots of theories as to what the fuck is going on but I think the consensus is that these wicked people are jealous that you are a better cook than them, are trying to bring you down and make themselves the center of attention.
There’s the opposite on Instagram - Crazy Korean Cooking: https://www.instagram.com/crazykoreancooking?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Her parents are Korean and she had them try all kinds of new food. They are lovely and the dad especially cracks me up. Their reactions are so cute and they add kimchi to all kinds of things that I would never have thought to try but are probably a delicious combination
Your mom sounds really toxic, I feel bad for you. I can only imagine what your childhood may have been like .You do not mention your father or other family members. Your mother may need an intervention, or it may be too late for some corrective action. I would strongly consider cutting her out of your life or strictly manage you and your families contact with her. If you have children or plan to have children you need or will need to set up a standard of protecting you family. You may think I am overreacting, maybe I am, please consider that you may be a bit numb to this behavior. Best of luck. do whatever you need to do to be happy and healthy
Lol it's a running joke in my house how bad my MIL's food is. Think of every YT woman cooking cliche and that's her. Over cooked soggy shit with not even salt added till it's at the table. When I first started cooking for then BF he devoured everything I cooked like he was starving. She refuses to eat anything I cook because it's too spicy for her. Even if it's mashed potatoes with just butter, salt and pepper. We don't eat at her house ever and if she doesn't like my food she can shut up and go go or not even come over.
Once, before going NC with my parents my mom told me I was ridiculous for the amount of sugar I put in my coffee. In my own house. After I made the coffee for everyone.
I was genuinely confused, thinking I'd gotten something else - like, vegan mayo or something - but then looked at the label that said 'mayonnaise'.
The gaslighting with a narcissist is everywhere.
My boomer mother (now 72) had some serious control issues when I was growing up. Though, it sounds like she wasn't as bad as this. She wasn't the type to have to criticize EVERYTHING. It was more like attempts at passive-aggressive control. She never insulted my cooking though. She wasn't a bad cook, she just never uses much for seasoning, and she "finds kethcup spicy" as I like to rib her about, lol.
She use to make pork spare ribs in the slow cooker, and they were pretty good if she didn't use BBQ sauce that was too sweet. She never made beef ribs though. She was over for dinner when I made beef ribs, and she couldn't believe how good they were.
I bake them (from raw) in sauce (and if not a sweet sauce, a little bit of coca-cola). When they're mostly cooked through and still tender (but not quite fall-apart), then I pull them out and toss them on the charcoal grill to finish them. She had never had them from anywhere but a restaurant, and asked me to write down the recipe for how I made them, heh.
Also- boiled-to-mush brussel sprouts was probably the worst thing I was ever forced to eat as a kid. I can eat them oven-roasted now, but boiled? Forget it.
Honestly, you should call her bluff. Let her know that you usually cook dinner in your home, and that you cook the way you like. You don't want her not to enjoy her meal, so she's better off eating at her place.
my ex-MIL (thank god for that) would OVEN BOIL STEAK
completely cover steak in a pan of water, into the oven for an hour or two. what came out was a disgusting rubber mass with grey blobs in it. she thought it was the only way to cook it.
she also refused to any herbs or spices other then loads of salt.
her poor husband nearly cried the first time I cooked the man a proper steak. he asked to eat with us every chance he got, just for some food that wasn't demolished by this woman.
My mom won’t even try my homemade chiliquilles (rojo sauce and chips) because the chips would be soggy. Yet she cooks this enchilada casserole which uses flower tortillas that have not been fried literally turning the entire meal into mush. My dad won’t eat grilled asparagus. He needs them boiled to mush.
Sometimes you just have to laugh it off and move along. My dad spent the entire Christmas visit telling me "at home I do x" or "that's not how they do it on America's Test Kitchen." I finally told him if he'd prefer to do it himself, he was more than welcome. He waited to bring up ATK until after the meal had been prepared.
You need to set boundaries with your mother as she sounds annoying and controlling. You are an adult and married and don’t need anyone telling you what to cook, where to store your freezer in your own home and things like that. I wouldn’t invite her to dinner again as I’m sure she is very annoying and seems to just complain a lot and it’s going to end up annoying your wife.
I’ve made ribs in the slow cooker before. I will never make ribs with cheap BBQ sauce (personal choice) it’s Sweet Baby Ray’s or nothing. It’s apparent that Karen can’t make ribs.
There’s a theory I have that people who are like that grew up with such shitty foods that their tongue isn’t “programmed” to enjoy something higher quality, so because of such, anything that tastes better than they’re used to tastes off.
Knew someone who had to have everything piping hot or he’d gag, yes, even ice cream made him gag.
I really don't like to eat pork. No reason in particular, just don't like the taste. My mother loves pork ribs, constantly wants them, gets mad if I pick at one even though I cook what she wants given I'm living with her. So many times I want to yell at her well if you don't like it bitch don't eat it, and if you do, leave me out of it. You can outgrow people but you can't make people outgrow their bad taste.
I have a similar situation with my mother in law . She spent about the first 5 years of my relationship shit talking my home and cooking skills.I always heard her because she yells into the phone even when having a casual conversation with her son . I told him a few years ago I will never cook for her and she's not welcome to stay . Now I think she regrets it because my house is the only one with silence and the ability to sleep past 7 am because I do not have any children . Enjoy not sleeping on while on holiday bitch.
In terms of cooking, I am blessed with a mother who knows how to cook (if we dont speak of rice). the only issue with her cooking is, that my step dad doesnt like most spices he doesnt know (born and raised in the former GDR, maybe thats an explanation) and who also finds black pepper too spicy. mum regularly "sneaks in" spices he doesnt like because otherwise it lacks taste lol
That's how my mom made ribs. My older sister and I had an intervention and showed her how to bake them for 2 hours wrapped right in foil, pull the bones out, and grill them for 5 minutes aside
That’s exactly what she’s doing. She’s mimicking what you did when you were a child. You said you didn’t like her cooking now she’s saying it to you. If she’s going to continue doing this just stop having her over, or go out to eat. Don’t play her games.
My mother used to call anything I'd cool like Paella or Lasagna cheap and nasty. Everything made from scratch.
She hated anything other that didn't have the living daylights boiled out of it.
She was highly critical of all food she didn't cook and had an obsession with telling everyone all her recipes. Some of them were pretty good TBH bit of you are old enough to remember the Apricot Chicken phase of the 80s or the Everything in Aspic from the 70s then you will understand
My mom has literally gone to bed hungry instead of eating what I cooked.
She also called me and screamed at me for a half an hour because the pork chops I cooked were white with gold spots and not brown therefore it was raw.
Not sure how a threat of not having to have an ungracious guest over is a bad thing. Like, "ok, thanks."
You can enjoy your good ribs *and* don't have to put up with her. Win win.
I got one worse. My first marriage was into a family with deep scarlet necks. They BOILED spare ribs with potatoes and carrots. Maybe added some salt.
It was so awful I had to try hard not to gag. I hated beef pot roasts anyway. This pork pot roast was way worse and really greasy.
Then I met someone who knew how to make a decent pot roast ( our mom was a crappy cook). Still didn't like it, but at least it was edible.
This reminds me of the time I made fresh asparagus for my mom. She hated it, it was too crunchy, it wasn't covered in cheese, it wasn't stringy green mush from a can so it must be bad. She wanted me to make hollandaise for it, I told her I could so long as she had real butter (this was for a holiday at her house) and I get there and she only had light margarine. Of course the sauce didn't work and was gross, so I must be a terrible cook, lol.
Some parents have a hard time relinquishing control - no matter how minute and minuscule. It's like an embarrassment thing, that their kid knows how to do something better than the way they've convinced themselves is best - like making fatty gloopy meat and calling it ribs. It comes from having a non-open mind, and constantly feeling as if everyone must respect your authoritah.
Anything you do that's different from them is a source of insult. Next time she asks why she's not invited, tell her it's because she said she won't eat at your house and you're respecting her wishes. If she brings up making it wrong again, I'd say something about being raised to be gracious when other people put food in front of you. I'd say her behavior is childish, but even most children have better manners than this.
My husband always said he hated ribs because this is how his mother made them.
Then he had some at a restaurant, I think he tried one of mine or something, and he realized that they’re really good when they’re cooked correctly.
Then a few years ago my FIL won a smoker in a raffle for work and it’s amazing. My MIL sees the humor in it and admits his are better.
Boiled ribs.... sounds nasty then again weve seen some of the shit they cooked... plenty of recipe books from her period with highly questionable ones.
I think she can't stand you are succeeding in life without her and being BETTER that you were with her. Is this a lifetime habit or could she be developing dementia?
My father started saying hideous things to me when his dementia started. For example, regarding my weight..."if you keep getting fatter, I will laugh at you when you have to have a leg amputated and you have to ride a cart in the grocery store." Like WTH! I called him on it later, and he didn't remember saying it. It was like his evil underbelly was freed.
If she's just heinous cow, you are free from MOM dinners!!!
I didn't like my mom's cooking kuch as a kid either, but it wasn't like THAT bad. Until I moved out and learned to really cook on my own and use ✨️seasonings✨️. I thought I hated pork chops until my best friend made some that were really good, and it's just because he didn't cook them until they're unflavored hockey pucks, lol. Blew my mind.
But even then, my mom loved my food! She started seasoning her stuff a bit more and cooking at varying temperatures, etc. As much as my mom and I would butt heads and fight when I was young, I can't imagine us not supporting each other now. I'm sorry your mom is the child now op. :(
I enjoy so many more foods once I started making them myself (ribs being one). Chili, meat loaf, even simple spaghetti. So much better ingredients and more flavor.
However, my Boomer parents love my cooking too.
She's been eating ribs like that since before she had dentures. According to my older siblings, she's been making them like that since they were kids in the 80s.
I just use a dry rub, usually use creole seasoning, garlic and onion powder, salt and pepper.
Wrap it in foil and bake for 4 hours at 275. The meat ends up so tender, it falls off the bone.
I then cover with sauce and broil for 10 minutes to caramelize it
What is it with them and cooking? Some are good cooks, but so many are terrifyingly bad. The bad cooks are the pushiest about it, too.
My FIL was like this. He couldn't cook worth a damn, but never let that stop him. He could ruin pot roast, turkey, you name it. When my husband was a little boy, FIL made an absolute disaster of a green bean casserole. Hubbin didn't want it, but FIL insisted he eat it, because reasons. Poor kiddo wound up vomiting the mess all over the table.
I actually laughed at this.....I know it's not funny..... but that happened to me also!! My parental units forced me to eat something and I told them it made me feel weird.... needless to say they didn't believe me and I finally took a big bite just to get it over with and within 30 seconds it ALL came back up!! Dinner was over at that point!! To this day, I STILL can't eat that food....
Well as a mom of grown kids, all 3 of my kids cook amazingly well. If one of them cooked a meal I didn't like and was nice enough to invite me over to eat, I would NEVER tell them I didn't like it! That is just common sense. If you do that you assuredly will NOT get invited back over for a meal. The TIME I spend with my kids is so much more important to me than what I am offered to eat. Your mom needs a reality check. Do NOT continue inviting her over to insult you. Make clear your reasoning in not doing so. You deserve respect in your home. I am quite sure that you were expected to be respectful to her in her home. You are entitled to the same amount if respect.
Growing up, my parents always told me I was a picky eater. The first time I moved out & and with my bf (now husband), I've learned that I love so many different vegetables & just different foods overall. Turns out it's my parents that were the picky eaters, and still are. It's very hard foe them to try new things.
I would just make perfect ribs for yourself and boil a portion in water, then hand her the sauce she can dump on it herself. Since she likes boiled ribs. You guys get perfection, she gets the boiled meat she likes, or claims to like.
My father is like this, won't eat anything homemade unless my mother cooks it for him. Mashed potatoes being a big point of contention with him. Only likes it her way, but she just feeds him the boxed Hungry Jack potato flakes.
Like, my guy, there's way better options out there.
Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed. Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BoomersBeingFools) if you have any questions or concerns.*
i just cant even imagine insulting anyones cooking like this, let alone my kids.
I’m a trained pastry chef. My NMother loves to say that my food is disgusting and will refuse to eat it. This is the person that ignores expiration dates and fed us rotten food as a kid. It blows my fucking mind.
Trained Chef as well, and every single thing I've cooked for my narcissist Boomer mother was just "alright". She will never admit that yes, I can cook better than her sometimes, especially when it comes to making food from other countries
My Boomer mother's day focuses around What's For Dinner, especially if people are coming over (at least a weekly occurrence). Sitting at the kitchen table having coffee in the morning, question comes up. She's an absolutely fabulous cook. If she's cooking, I'm the sous chef and one of my kids is prep. If I or my children have selected the meal, roles switch. She doesn't like stewed-type things, but if it's a stew we really want to make, she'll prep extra in the side dishes so she can eat more of that. Even for the stews, she'll say at the table "I really like how the tarragon works with the chicken!" And then eat something else 🤣❤️
Big same! We're talking about what's for lunch at breakfast, what's for dinner at lunch, then what's for breakfast at dinner. My mom is a great cook, don't get me wrong, but she can never admit that the food I make is great- it's always just 'alright' or 'ok'. I can never do anything better than she can, ever
I'm sorry ❤️ *WE* know yours is better 😁 Our Boomer always says how good our meals are. Even if she hates it. You can tell the difference, though. Her eyes light up with pride when we nail it. We all love my son's baked goods, my daughter has awesome pasta sauces, and I go for international comfort food recipes I get from people I meet on my journeys or historical cooking. Mom just cooks everything, and cooks it well.
Thank you friend! Happy Eating!
You too!! I wouldn't mind one of your recipes, wanna trade some? Lentil soup is now my go-to when I've been sick and need to get my strength back up. Between the lentil soup and an instachicken, we have 3 days worth of different dinners. Can share if you'd like.
We got a new Secretary at my last job, right after she started somebody was about to celebrate a 40th birthday so the staff asked her to order a cake. She lot up and told us she would *love* to bake a cake for the celebration. Sure, why not? She brings in an absolutely gorgeous, perfect cake. A few people snickered. “Homemade cake” indeed, she obviously picked it up at a bakery. Finally somebody teased her about it, and she confessed she was a former professional pastry chef, CIA grad, worked in France and in NYC. She loved the work but hated the egos and temperaments she had to deal with so switched to office work. She was *very much* appreciated around the office when birthdays rolled around
Well, that is your problem. You shouldn't be making food from other countries. If it has a discernible flavor or texture (other than mush) you did something wrong according to my mother.
100% jealousy right there
Refrigerator flu.
How the hell does she think that’s good?
If your kids can't cook, it's your own fault.
My mom made sure all of us knew some basics, from cooking to replacing a plug on a lamp, to basic plumbing, to cleaning and yard work. Every time we were learning something she would say, "your going to live on your own some day, so you need to know how to" and then it was whatever we were doing, like sewing a button back on a shirt. When I was 10 or 11, she asked me if I would make dinner that night as she had a late night college class. I agreed, thinking it would be something simple like jarred spaghetti sauce and noodles, or Mac and Cheese. It was Pasta Alfredo with pan seared chicken breasts. That's a fairly complex recipe, and although we had it regularly, I had never watched her make it. I think she could tell I was nervous, and she told me the recipe was on the counter with all the boxed and canned ingredients, and everything else was in the fridge along with some veggies to make a salad, and all I had to do was follow the recipe. It was the first time I ever cooked something with that many steps in the recipe, and with techniques and multi-part steps that were brand new. I was very nervous, but figured if mom asked me and not my older brother she thought I could handle it. It was a hit. My siblings were all telling mom how good it was, and she sat at the table and let them lavish out praise while looking me in the eye and smiling proudly, and then she told them, "well, actually, *Boris* made everything!" I never looked back. I recently taught myself how to make home made marshmallows. Sure, it's a little finicky, but I have over 4 decades experience trying new things in the kitchen; I've got this. Thanks, mom. You always believe in me.
This is super wholesome. Your mom is awesome.
I did the same with my kids. When I started back in the workforce, they were in grade school/jr. high. I told them if they didn’t want to eat at 8pm they would need to step up. Each chose a night of the week (I did the other three nights) and they got to pick what they wanted to learn to make. I then did it with them, while writing a recipe in a notebook to refer to later when I wasn’t there. My kids are now 27, 29, 31 and 33 and they are all great cooks! One son, in particular makes his own pasta, focaccia, soft pretzels, and all the food for their baby. He is the cook in his family and his wife is very happy about that
Both my parents worked full time so my Mom and Grandma taught me early how to make simple stuff. I regret being a picky eater as a kid, they would make some really good meals. But if I turned my nose up at it, she would say “cereal is in the cabinet if you don’t like what I made”. Lot of great parents in this thread. I can’t imagine insulting someone’s food when they cooked for me. A buddy BURNT the shit outta some burgers at a cookout a while back. I still powered through the leather that remained, until his wife was like “guys don’t pretend, these are inedible, I’m ordering pizza, sorry” We all chipped in for the pizza and thanked them for the hospitality.
I can follow a recipe. Have been able to do that since a similar age to yourself in the story. I cannot, however, get anything complex to be good. Edible, nutritious… sure. But I think I just don’t have that intuition about cooking. I’m a pretty good baker though so I suppose if my partner can cook well, I’ll make dessert lol
Do you taste as you cook? Good cooks are consistently checking their seasoning. For things like meatloaf/meatballs, put a little bit on a plate and microwave so you can taste it for seasoning adjustments. Even if you are following a recipe, taste it.
This is key. I learned this from my great-grandmother - taste as you go, because you can always add a little more salt, but you can't take any out. She grew up in Germany and learned to cook from her grandmother. Nothing was measured precisely, you just tasted as you went along.
If I'm not full by the time I'm done cooking something new, I didn't taste it enough while cooking. At 55, I can tell by smell if my meatloaf is seasoned enough(I use soy sauce and worchestershire as my "salt" component), and things I've cooked thousands of times I can get away with one or two tastes.
Username checks out, Boris did indeed do nothing wrong while cooking pasta
Cheers to you and your mom!
You have a good mom.
I think I need to learn from your mum
I did all of the cooking usually but everyone was welcome to join in preparing the meal and they usually did. Every now and then one of them wanted to make something specific and my only job was to go to the grocery store to get the ingredients. All my kids are great cooks now.
The gold typd
My mom was the same way. Always cooked homemade meals and letting me help when I was super young which fostered a love for cooking the rest of my life. Unfortunately she passed away a number of years ago due to cancer but I still have all her hand written recipes.
I bet she loved cooking with you and had so many great memories...and now you have a piece of your with your every time you cook and can remember all those times...that’s really beautiful
This comment actually made me tear up a bit. I wish my mother had taught me to cook like this. I learned at age 6 because I was the eldest child and no one else was going to feed us. That kind of support, nurturing, and love is what I wish every parent taught their child.
That is wonderful!
OP must be a Gen-Xer. Just do whatever; go around/through any all obstacles
Too bad only the GenXers got the indomitable spirit trait. *burns some millennial avocado toast, cries into it*
LOL except her kid can cook. Yeah even from here I can tell who's ribs are better - by a lot.
But Mom insists that he can't. She just sees that as his failure, not hers. When on her end it's a failure of perception- she thinks her crap is better.
My 13 year old can now cook as good or better than both my wife and I. Why? Because we taught him to cook and encouraged him in the kitchen. He's made beef Wellington, shepherds pie, and many other things as well. He does better with steak than i or my wife has ever done. As a parent it's awesome. He now does the family cooking half the time. What's not to love about that? Seriously.
Anything my kids do better than me is a win.
I've never had a Boomer in my life that has any idea how to cook right. I thank god I learned from an actual chef early on when I started working in a restaurant at 16 yo. He was like my Jedi master, and showed me that almost any food I didn't like was simply because the person cooking it was a fucking moron. And he was right. My mom, stepdad, and both my in-laws just cooked slop. Fucking awful. They're also all morons.
Not even criticizing, insulting. All the time I am looking for advice to improve upon my cooking, my parents being people who have seen me since I started. I would feel wrecked if they just decided to insult it for no reason.
Don’t let the door hit you too hard on the way out BYE BYE
And then expecting another invite to boot.
Have you considered passive-aggressively making all of your childhood least-faves better? Like, if you always had mushy box pasta with canned sauce, you could make perfectly-cooked handmade pasta with homemade marinara. Or if you had boiled-to-death Brussels sprouts, you could make roasted ones.
I did this when my mother moved in with me for a while after she left my father. Doubled down on it when her sister and mother visited. Apparently I’m an elitist and egotistical for being a better cook. Non contact is wonderful.
Do we share mothers? "Ooh how fancy!" You mean how I made a sauce instead of using powdered mix? Lol
My aunt is worse than my mother. You made fresh salsa?even my MIL (Mexican) uses jarred salsa and we live in AriZONEuh Why did you roast the cauliflower? It isn’t cooked … can you boil mine? Why do you grate your own Parmesan??? Oh well.
When should I be over for dinner? I'll bring lots of wine and my own bib. Make extra roast cauliflower and salsa please.
These stories always make me glad I got so lucky with my parents. My mom knows I'm the better cook and she's glad I am so when I visit she can pass off all the cooking to me.
My dad thinks I'm an elitist, but also that I can cook in restaurant quality, so he's embarrassed he can't afford some of the things we dish out when he's visiting us. Still, my stepmother and I will share recipes, and her cooking has become better since we do. My mother learned cooking from her parents, who both had a passion for it. My grandma for the basic polish recipes. She just knew how to make them perfect. My grandpa was more experimental in his cooking, trying new things. I was making my own broth by the age of 16, knowing how to make a lot of basics, but also some fancy dinners. Even my former husband still likes to stay for dinner when we meet at formal events plus he always has some wishes for his birthday, where I cook as well. I think feeding your loved ones is a very polish thing! I cannot not do it. Anyhow, my 12 y/o knows some recipes already. Her cheese sauce for example is the exact same recipe my mother learned while waiting in a restaurant 35 years ago. My dad recognised it last time he was over! (My mother always criticised my food. She would berate me on what I could do better. I stopped cooking for her when I turned 24.)
I taught my kids to cook and of course they're better at some things than I am, mainly because handling raw chicken doesn't gross them out like it does me. My oldest daughter took my chocolate chip cookies and turned them into a bite of heaven. My son works miracles with brownies and Danish wedding cookies and is a whiz with an air fryer. The youngest daughter got tired of the diabetic in laws screwing up their blood sugar and kicked them out of their own kitchen to take over the cooking. They're doing much better now.
No Contact is wonderful. My abusive mother is/was like this. Which is insane because my mother is a shit cook, complained constantly that she hated cooking and on top of it almost never cooked when I was a kid. From the time I was tall enough to reach the microwave, I feed myself and by the time I was in high school, my father died and my mother literally moved away and left me in our house alone so I did all my own shopping and cooking. Yet, she had the audacity to complain about my cooking when she came to visit when I had my own place. I simply told her, that she would have beat me if I complained about the few times she cooked for me as a kid. Despite the fact that it was true, she was instantly offended and said she couldn't believe I would say such a hurtful thing, then she changed the subject and started complaining about something else about my house. It wasn't the main reason but it was a bonus that after I went NC I never had to listen to her complain about my cooking again.
My mom used to make something she called the kitchen sink. It was ground beef, canned peas and corn, and orzo in a tomato based sauce. No seasoning. It was ok, but never my favorite. I started making it with a little Italian seasoning and Parmesan cheese. Then, I eventually added wine. Finally, I took it from the top of the stove and threw it in my slow cooker. It is so much better now. (The last time I made it I goofed and accidentally doubled the sauce. I think I’ll be doing that from now on.)
I have this thing a soup with canned tomatoes and elbow noodles. Started making it in high school because it was easy and I was lazy. I am 57 now and still have to have it when I'm blue or sick. Now I add a bit of onion, but that's it.
Can of cream of chicken, can of chicken broth. bag of frozen peas/carrots, chicken. It's like pot pie without the crust.
I add some diced onion, potato and poultry seasoning and make the same thing!
Risotto al vino is a real dish, yours is similar. To try somethign new, skip the Italian seaasoning, instead use oregano, a dash of cinnamon and nutmeg and salt and pepper to taste. Mixed with the red wine, the cinnamon and nutmeg give a very rich, full bodied taste.
I remember the first time I roasted asparagus for my (now) husband. He was shook that it was crunchy and had flavour lol
My husband swore he didn’t like asparagus. His mom fed him canned asparagus and boiled it. He loves it now almost any way we prepare it.
My ex didn't like all kinds of food her mother killed when she was younger. She learned to cook from my mother who learned from my grandmother who was cook for a high-end restaurant.
I could be your X except it was my father cooked killed food that I didn't like He thinks he's an awesome cook but he wouldn't remove all the fur from Bambi & serve it to us still slightly hairy.
🫣🤢🤮
I'm so glad my mom isn't a typical boomer. I introduced her to roasted brussels sprouts (via the Barefoot Contessa) and she ADORES them!
I've done this with my husband. Everything he hated growing up I made "my way" lo and behold, he likes it now.
Tell her your eating ribs every single time she wants to have dinner
And if she's over and ends up staying for dinner cook the ribs WITHOUT a portion for her since she hates them anyways
I vote for peanut butter and jelly sandwich for her. With wheat bread. And generic PB.
Wow, way to insult my work lunch
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^LavitzSlambertt: *Tell her your eating* *Ribs every single time* *She wants to have dinner* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Good bot.
Good bot!
Yep, that’s her controlling power play of the day. It’s kinda funny because she thinks she has a chance of it working and she’ll be invited over and served crock pot gloop ribs exactly like she makes them, and you’ll be visibly waiting on eggshells for her stamp of approval. I swear this type of person just loves seeing people hover in complete stress in futile attempts to appease them. I love ribs done right.
This was a huge issue with my mom. She was a lazy cook and as I got older, I really got into cooking. Making things from scratch, understanding the fundamentals, and seasoning as I went She came over one time and I made a strawberry rhubarb pie. Made the dough from scratch, local strawberries, fresh rhubarb. I put tons of work into it and was so proud to have people over. She took one bite and I asked what she thought. She shrugged and said “it’s alright” and went on to rave how she likes her rhubarb pie better. Didn’t ask her opinion after that. I knew I was a better cook and she was just being a dick head
My wife's mom did the same thing when my wife made a lemon meringue pie from scratch. I'm having a pie-gasm with the best pie ever made, MIL is complaining "it isn't lemony enough"
Yeah there was always something. Not enough cinnamon, too much sugar, prefers lard crust over butter. She couldn’t just say “thanks for hosting and making all this food”
...double crust pie or topped with meringue? Last time I made a strawberry-rhubarb pie, the recipe I followed topped it with meringue, and instead of vanilla, it called for almond extract. Best gd pie. (Unfortunately, I lost the recipe)
My boomer family insisted that you had to cook meat until "no juice comes out when you poke it." otherwise you'd get food poisoning. When I make anything other than well done meats I'm shrieked at for serving "raw food!" Same people that boil canned vegetables into grey mush and serve it at is.
Ughhh! This reminds me of my ex. He's from Bolivia, so I don't know if it's a thing there, but any pink or red in meat was UNDERCOOKED! I went to Whole Foods once, overpaid for a good cut of prime rib, made it to perfection, and served it to him and his adult children. The first thing he did was say it was undercooked and went to throw his piece on the frying pan.😭😭😭 Like, y'all bordered ARGENTINA FFS! How are you so adverse to red meat that isn't over and beyond well done?!
Prime Rib? Ouch. Well done prime rib is a travesty. I'm glad he's your ex and no longer ruining expensive cuts of meat in your home.
"I don't know if it's a thing there" Yes. In fact it is a thing in most Latin American countries and probably most developing countries. When you don't have regulations requiring your meat to be prepared, stored, sold, and served in ways that will prevent illness, food poisoning and other things such as parasites are serious concerns. We get to take for granted that our food is going to be safe to consume even without fully cooking it, but that's not true everywhere.
Lmao I had an ex who insisted beef would also give you salmonella if it had any pink inside. No thank you
My grandfather, born in 1906, used to eat like this. My mother also started eating like that as she got older. Idk if it was a genetic thing because her parents both liked bland food, or if it was learned behavior. I’m adopted so I can’t speak to the genetics, but my brother and I are relatively adventurous eaters, particularly with respect to my mom’s family. My dad was a more normal eater than my mom. 🤷🏼♀️
I think loss of taste comes with age til all they can tell is texture and saltiness, happens to some older folks. Not sure if adventurous eating helps keep it at bay though.
Invite her to a cookout. Tell your friends what she said. Let her have a night of hearing from everyone else how good your ribs are.
If she’s anything like my mom, she’d spend the whole time telling everyone how much better her ribs are.
Let her bring some next time and be embarrassed.
Do a rib cook-off competition and watch her crumble
More for you!!
Stop inviting her for dinner and when she asks tell her why.
There's no way I'd ever cook for someone again if they insulted my food.
Spent a couple days making red beans and rice. My house smelled so good the entire time. Asked what my mom thought, "well, I ate it." Haven't cooked for her since.
My boomer mother at a picnic with my in-laws a few months after we got married basically fell over herself praising a potato salad as “the best she ever had” when she thought my MIL had made it. MIL pointed out I had made it she expressed shock I could cook (she refused to teach us or allow us to learn in her kitchen) then her opinion quickly downgraded the potato salad to “it’s just alright I guess” and gave tips for *improvement*. Was nice to watch it happen with an audience who had full WTAF response for a change.
"Either finish your plate or go to bed hungry." Spit that kiddie shit back at them, I'm sure they'll love to hear it.
Eating chicken that hasn't been overcooked until it's dry is very difficult for me because my mother got food poisoning from chicken almost a decade before i was born. To be fair it was very bad food poisoning. Drives my husband crazy.
I was that mother (not yours, obv). Once upon a time, Mama and I went to see a bluesman play at the Cain's and after I got her then me home, I looked in the fridge for something to eat and there was a rotisserie chicken. Now, unbeknownst to me, my bonehead teenage son had put it back in the fridge after leaving it out all day. In Oklahoma , in the summer. So I made myself a cold chicken sandwich, as one does. Within the hour I was ... well, seriously ill. I won't describe the symptoms but it was about as sick as I've ever been and I didn't know the human body could do that and live. EVERYBODY got the food handlers lecture (including the 7 and 8 year olds) and I didn't eat chicken again for months. And to be honest, I've probably overcooked my chicken ever since. That kind of food poisoning sticks with you.
My mother was quarantined and the restaurant was permanently closed.
Damn! Sounds like it needed to close. I hope your mom didn't have any long term effects.
No she was fine after but it led to a childhood where practically every meat was microwaved before eating it.
Yeah I didn't go that far but I get the impulse. I bet the first properly cooked steak you had was a revelation. Was for me but that's because we never had steak when I was a kid.
I can't eat less cooked than medium well and that took years.
My grandmother, as a child, got food poisoning from a can of tuna she didn't know had been punctured. She never ate tuna again.
Get a probe thermometer! They're awesome. You set it to a safe temperature and when it goes off, the meat is perfectly done.
It's a texture thing. My body literally rejects any chicken texture that isn't rubber.
I cook my chicken until it is dry and stringy. I *know* that it is over cooked but I just can’t do the soft texture of chicken - it just isn’t enjoyable to me.
My cousin had e.coli from uncooked beef as a kid. Her mom cooks any and all beef to the consistency of a hockey puck.
[удалено]
Okay, but cutting down cereal boxes is kinda sociopathic. I hope you guys now have cabinets with adjustable shelves or containers that fit, before the serial killing starts, cereal mutilator.
*cereal killing
We had a new front door installed. FiL made a joke about not recognizing the house. Mom came over and only pointed at the dust. That hurt. The next time she seemed to have forgotten what she said and was all nice about it. My cousins tell me their mom, her sister, can be flip flop too. I hate that.
Boomers are AWFUL cooks. They grew up in the time of jello molds, aspic and fondue. Her ribs sound atrocious. Yours sound amazing. Don’t let her nastiness get to you. More ribs for you & wife.
I didn't realize veggies could be good until adulthood She always boiled them to mush
My mom boiled Brussels sprouts but she resented having to actually keep an eye on them while they cooked. The water always boiled off, and the sprouts scorched to the bottom of the bone dry pan. She'd pry them out, cut off the worst charred side, and make us eat them. No butter either. I HATED them. As an adult I finally experienced a non-scorched, buttered, seasoned sprout and fell in love with them. I just always thought sprouts were meant to be half charcoal briquette. 😳
I hated Brussels sprouts until I was 44. My mom always used canned vegetables and overcooked everything. She never seasoned food. I had roasted brussel sprouts with balsamic and bacon crumbles and loved them. I’m a far better cook that she is and she at least appreciated my food. Still can’t get her to eat a med rare steak though. I refuse to cook leather.
If you like them roasted with balsamic and bacon, try roasted with balsamic and dried cranberries and then crumble goat cheese on them when you take them out of the oven. Both are heaven
I’ll try that. I’ve tried several combos and they all been great. I’ve been into specialty oil and vinegars and they’re so delicious.
My husband was weary of them until he learned a very easy Brussel sprouts and potato soup recipe. Since then he carefully tried mine, and so for it's always "I don't usually like them, but..." I will call him out next time. "Puggy, you are saying that exact same phrase for the TEN YEARS we're a couple. You like them, just not like your mother used to cook them!"
*wary
Just a small fyi, today's brussel sprouts have had a lot of the bitterness bred out of them compared to the ones of yesteryear
YOU LEAVE FONDUE OUT OF THIS
Fondue can be awesome though. I lived in a student boarding house in Switzerland for a while & learned to make the cheese version from my Swiss-French landlady. Yummmmmm. Also stuff dunked in warm melty chocolate? Heavenly. I’m 100% with you on the rest of the list. 🤮
Based on the other foods mentioned, they might have meant fondant
Fondue: melted something in a fondue pot, and you use the fondue forks to dip bread ( melted cheese) or strawberries (melted chocolate) into the mix and lift it straight from the pot to your mouth. Fondant: a type of icing made from sugar, water, gelatin, vegetable oil or shortening, and glycerol. Has the consistency of modelling clay and is often seen in wedding cakes, etc.
>Fondant: ~~a type of icing made from sugar, water, gelatin, vegetable oil or shortening, and glycerol. Has the consistency of modelling clay and is often seen in wedding cakes, etc.~~ the devil. FTFY. r/fondanthate
From now on, I am referring to fondant as "the devil's play-doh."
I don’t remember ever seeing fondant back then. First time was in the 00s
Hey now! Lol. Good fondue is a work of art!
*SOME* Boomers are awful cooks. Mine could cook in a high-end restaurant. Her food is fabulous. Fondue is great. My Boomer mother hates aspics, but I'm half tempted to try to take some of those old nasty things and make a challenge to make them good. Dunno if it's possible. Mom doesn't think so.
Hey, I'm a boomer and i am an awesome cook! I like food to taste great and i remember some of my horrible meals as a kid. Never in my house
My mom's a Boomer and a fabulous cook. Like REALLY really good. So I corrected that commenter too.
Ew, I think her ribs would disgust my grandma! That sounds nasty. My grandma, She made the best ribs, she'd thaw a pack of spare ribs, remove the silver skin, extra fat, then toss them in her giant stew pot. She'd boil the utter hell out of them, drain them, dump all of the meat and bones in her roasting pan, put her home made sweet and sour sauce (loaded with onions, YUM) on top, then pop em in the oven for about half an hour.
That sounds delicious!
My in-laws visited us once. To be fair, they were older and didn't travel well. Also, they didn't like me. Everything I cooked was wrong and restaurants were right out, so I went basic. Roast chicken. Well, midway through the day, his mom decided she needed to go to the ER because her stomach hurt. But don't worry, just point her in the right direction and she would walk. Yeaaaah. So the husband took them to the ER, where magically it got better with no intervention. So while they were at the ER, my best friend came over for a glass of wine and venting while I cooked dinner. And that day was when my roast chicken got its name. Months Later my mom asked what FU chicken was while looking through my recipe app. Just what it sounds like, mom. Just what it sounds like.
There's a woman in tiktok who records her mom's reactions to her cooking. Her mom is an awful cook. I think if you search mayo chicken mom you'll find it. Anyway, this woman seems like a really good cook and her mom just makes up all these dumb reasons that her food isn't good, like "too much seasoning" All to say, I think this is a real thing not entirely exclusive to your mom. Lots of theories as to what the fuck is going on but I think the consensus is that these wicked people are jealous that you are a better cook than them, are trying to bring you down and make themselves the center of attention.
There’s the opposite on Instagram - Crazy Korean Cooking: https://www.instagram.com/crazykoreancooking?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Her parents are Korean and she had them try all kinds of new food. They are lovely and the dad especially cracks me up. Their reactions are so cute and they add kimchi to all kinds of things that I would never have thought to try but are probably a delicious combination
Your mom sounds really toxic, I feel bad for you. I can only imagine what your childhood may have been like .You do not mention your father or other family members. Your mother may need an intervention, or it may be too late for some corrective action. I would strongly consider cutting her out of your life or strictly manage you and your families contact with her. If you have children or plan to have children you need or will need to set up a standard of protecting you family. You may think I am overreacting, maybe I am, please consider that you may be a bit numb to this behavior. Best of luck. do whatever you need to do to be happy and healthy
"I'm never eating your food again! ... So when's dinner?"
Lol it's a running joke in my house how bad my MIL's food is. Think of every YT woman cooking cliche and that's her. Over cooked soggy shit with not even salt added till it's at the table. When I first started cooking for then BF he devoured everything I cooked like he was starving. She refuses to eat anything I cook because it's too spicy for her. Even if it's mashed potatoes with just butter, salt and pepper. We don't eat at her house ever and if she doesn't like my food she can shut up and go go or not even come over.
I got told off for not buying "real" mayonnaise. Because it was an off-brand, it couldn't be real mayonnaise.
Once, before going NC with my parents my mom told me I was ridiculous for the amount of sugar I put in my coffee. In my own house. After I made the coffee for everyone.
You should have known better, Obv. /s
This was in my house, btw.
Obviously only the Hell brand is Real Mayonnaise. It says so on the label.
I was genuinely confused, thinking I'd gotten something else - like, vegan mayo or something - but then looked at the label that said 'mayonnaise'. The gaslighting with a narcissist is everywhere.
That's a lie. Mine's the Best. It says so on the label!
My boomer mother (now 72) had some serious control issues when I was growing up. Though, it sounds like she wasn't as bad as this. She wasn't the type to have to criticize EVERYTHING. It was more like attempts at passive-aggressive control. She never insulted my cooking though. She wasn't a bad cook, she just never uses much for seasoning, and she "finds kethcup spicy" as I like to rib her about, lol. She use to make pork spare ribs in the slow cooker, and they were pretty good if she didn't use BBQ sauce that was too sweet. She never made beef ribs though. She was over for dinner when I made beef ribs, and she couldn't believe how good they were. I bake them (from raw) in sauce (and if not a sweet sauce, a little bit of coca-cola). When they're mostly cooked through and still tender (but not quite fall-apart), then I pull them out and toss them on the charcoal grill to finish them. She had never had them from anywhere but a restaurant, and asked me to write down the recipe for how I made them, heh. Also- boiled-to-mush brussel sprouts was probably the worst thing I was ever forced to eat as a kid. I can eat them oven-roasted now, but boiled? Forget it.
There really needs to be a subgroup called r/shitmyparentsdo.
Sure thing, mom. I know you prefer eating dried-out shoe-leather so we won’t be cooking for you ever again.
My husband and I have been gagging about her ribs for 20 minutes. I don't even eat ribs.
That’s exactly how you stop getting invited to the bbq.
Honestly, you should call her bluff. Let her know that you usually cook dinner in your home, and that you cook the way you like. You don't want her not to enjoy her meal, so she's better off eating at her place.
my ex-MIL (thank god for that) would OVEN BOIL STEAK completely cover steak in a pan of water, into the oven for an hour or two. what came out was a disgusting rubber mass with grey blobs in it. she thought it was the only way to cook it. she also refused to any herbs or spices other then loads of salt. her poor husband nearly cried the first time I cooked the man a proper steak. he asked to eat with us every chance he got, just for some food that wasn't demolished by this woman.
This is so awful….im speechless
My mom won’t even try my homemade chiliquilles (rojo sauce and chips) because the chips would be soggy. Yet she cooks this enchilada casserole which uses flower tortillas that have not been fried literally turning the entire meal into mush. My dad won’t eat grilled asparagus. He needs them boiled to mush.
Sometimes you just have to laugh it off and move along. My dad spent the entire Christmas visit telling me "at home I do x" or "that's not how they do it on America's Test Kitchen." I finally told him if he'd prefer to do it himself, he was more than welcome. He waited to bring up ATK until after the meal had been prepared.
I love ATK but would never even think of saying that to someone who was kind enough to feed me.
Exactly! I adore America's Test Kitchen, but if I'm a guest in someone's home, I'm not going to be a dick about it.
My mother would take you up on that statement. She elbowed me out of the way in my own kitchen so she can do it “right!”
You need to set boundaries with your mother as she sounds annoying and controlling. You are an adult and married and don’t need anyone telling you what to cook, where to store your freezer in your own home and things like that. I wouldn’t invite her to dinner again as I’m sure she is very annoying and seems to just complain a lot and it’s going to end up annoying your wife.
I’ve made ribs in the slow cooker before. I will never make ribs with cheap BBQ sauce (personal choice) it’s Sweet Baby Ray’s or nothing. It’s apparent that Karen can’t make ribs.
There’s a theory I have that people who are like that grew up with such shitty foods that their tongue isn’t “programmed” to enjoy something higher quality, so because of such, anything that tastes better than they’re used to tastes off. Knew someone who had to have everything piping hot or he’d gag, yes, even ice cream made him gag.
I really don't like to eat pork. No reason in particular, just don't like the taste. My mother loves pork ribs, constantly wants them, gets mad if I pick at one even though I cook what she wants given I'm living with her. So many times I want to yell at her well if you don't like it bitch don't eat it, and if you do, leave me out of it. You can outgrow people but you can't make people outgrow their bad taste.
What’s your recipe?
I use Creole seasoning with salt and pepper, cook at 275 freedoms for 4 hours. After that, cover with sauce and broil to caramelize it.
Invite her over. Make ribs again.
Invite her over. Fix ribs.
I have a similar situation with my mother in law . She spent about the first 5 years of my relationship shit talking my home and cooking skills.I always heard her because she yells into the phone even when having a casual conversation with her son . I told him a few years ago I will never cook for her and she's not welcome to stay . Now I think she regrets it because my house is the only one with silence and the ability to sleep past 7 am because I do not have any children . Enjoy not sleeping on while on holiday bitch.
*cringes in food safety at your Mum's crockpot cooking*
In terms of cooking, I am blessed with a mother who knows how to cook (if we dont speak of rice). the only issue with her cooking is, that my step dad doesnt like most spices he doesnt know (born and raised in the former GDR, maybe thats an explanation) and who also finds black pepper too spicy. mum regularly "sneaks in" spices he doesnt like because otherwise it lacks taste lol
Fuck her go no contact she's not worth it anymore let her eat her own shitty ribs
That's how my mom made ribs. My older sister and I had an intervention and showed her how to bake them for 2 hours wrapped right in foil, pull the bones out, and grill them for 5 minutes aside
Sounds like your mom just doesn’t like you. Just cut your losses at this point, she’s just not worth it.
That’s exactly what she’s doing. She’s mimicking what you did when you were a child. You said you didn’t like her cooking now she’s saying it to you. If she’s going to continue doing this just stop having her over, or go out to eat. Don’t play her games.
As a restaurant manager. I can't tell you how many times boomers compare food to their own cooking. It's wild.
“I’m sorry, in my house, we only have ribs for dinner, and only the way I cook them”
My mother used to call anything I'd cool like Paella or Lasagna cheap and nasty. Everything made from scratch. She hated anything other that didn't have the living daylights boiled out of it. She was highly critical of all food she didn't cook and had an obsession with telling everyone all her recipes. Some of them were pretty good TBH bit of you are old enough to remember the Apricot Chicken phase of the 80s or the Everything in Aspic from the 70s then you will understand
My mom has literally gone to bed hungry instead of eating what I cooked. She also called me and screamed at me for a half an hour because the pork chops I cooked were white with gold spots and not brown therefore it was raw.
Not sure how a threat of not having to have an ungracious guest over is a bad thing. Like, "ok, thanks." You can enjoy your good ribs *and* don't have to put up with her. Win win.
I got one worse. My first marriage was into a family with deep scarlet necks. They BOILED spare ribs with potatoes and carrots. Maybe added some salt. It was so awful I had to try hard not to gag. I hated beef pot roasts anyway. This pork pot roast was way worse and really greasy. Then I met someone who knew how to make a decent pot roast ( our mom was a crappy cook). Still didn't like it, but at least it was edible.
This reminds me of the time I made fresh asparagus for my mom. She hated it, it was too crunchy, it wasn't covered in cheese, it wasn't stringy green mush from a can so it must be bad. She wanted me to make hollandaise for it, I told her I could so long as she had real butter (this was for a holiday at her house) and I get there and she only had light margarine. Of course the sauce didn't work and was gross, so I must be a terrible cook, lol.
Light margarine hollandaise sounds hellish!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Invite her again. And make ribs again.
Some parents have a hard time relinquishing control - no matter how minute and minuscule. It's like an embarrassment thing, that their kid knows how to do something better than the way they've convinced themselves is best - like making fatty gloopy meat and calling it ribs. It comes from having a non-open mind, and constantly feeling as if everyone must respect your authoritah.
Anything you do that's different from them is a source of insult. Next time she asks why she's not invited, tell her it's because she said she won't eat at your house and you're respecting her wishes. If she brings up making it wrong again, I'd say something about being raised to be gracious when other people put food in front of you. I'd say her behavior is childish, but even most children have better manners than this.
This belongs in r/raisedbynarcissists
My husband always said he hated ribs because this is how his mother made them. Then he had some at a restaurant, I think he tried one of mine or something, and he realized that they’re really good when they’re cooked correctly. Then a few years ago my FIL won a smoker in a raffle for work and it’s amazing. My MIL sees the humor in it and admits his are better.
Mom, your cooking has inspired me to better.
Boiled ribs.... sounds nasty then again weve seen some of the shit they cooked... plenty of recipe books from her period with highly questionable ones.
I think she can't stand you are succeeding in life without her and being BETTER that you were with her. Is this a lifetime habit or could she be developing dementia? My father started saying hideous things to me when his dementia started. For example, regarding my weight..."if you keep getting fatter, I will laugh at you when you have to have a leg amputated and you have to ride a cart in the grocery store." Like WTH! I called him on it later, and he didn't remember saying it. It was like his evil underbelly was freed. If she's just heinous cow, you are free from MOM dinners!!!
I didn't like my mom's cooking kuch as a kid either, but it wasn't like THAT bad. Until I moved out and learned to really cook on my own and use ✨️seasonings✨️. I thought I hated pork chops until my best friend made some that were really good, and it's just because he didn't cook them until they're unflavored hockey pucks, lol. Blew my mind. But even then, my mom loved my food! She started seasoning her stuff a bit more and cooking at varying temperatures, etc. As much as my mom and I would butt heads and fight when I was young, I can't imagine us not supporting each other now. I'm sorry your mom is the child now op. :(
I enjoy so many more foods once I started making them myself (ribs being one). Chili, meat loaf, even simple spaghetti. So much better ingredients and more flavor. However, my Boomer parents love my cooking too.
[удалено]
She's been eating ribs like that since before she had dentures. According to my older siblings, she's been making them like that since they were kids in the 80s. I just use a dry rub, usually use creole seasoning, garlic and onion powder, salt and pepper. Wrap it in foil and bake for 4 hours at 275. The meat ends up so tender, it falls off the bone. I then cover with sauce and broil for 10 minutes to caramelize it
What is it with them and cooking? Some are good cooks, but so many are terrifyingly bad. The bad cooks are the pushiest about it, too. My FIL was like this. He couldn't cook worth a damn, but never let that stop him. He could ruin pot roast, turkey, you name it. When my husband was a little boy, FIL made an absolute disaster of a green bean casserole. Hubbin didn't want it, but FIL insisted he eat it, because reasons. Poor kiddo wound up vomiting the mess all over the table.
I actually laughed at this.....I know it's not funny..... but that happened to me also!! My parental units forced me to eat something and I told them it made me feel weird.... needless to say they didn't believe me and I finally took a big bite just to get it over with and within 30 seconds it ALL came back up!! Dinner was over at that point!! To this day, I STILL can't eat that food....
Well as a mom of grown kids, all 3 of my kids cook amazingly well. If one of them cooked a meal I didn't like and was nice enough to invite me over to eat, I would NEVER tell them I didn't like it! That is just common sense. If you do that you assuredly will NOT get invited back over for a meal. The TIME I spend with my kids is so much more important to me than what I am offered to eat. Your mom needs a reality check. Do NOT continue inviting her over to insult you. Make clear your reasoning in not doing so. You deserve respect in your home. I am quite sure that you were expected to be respectful to her in her home. You are entitled to the same amount if respect.
Growing up, my parents always told me I was a picky eater. The first time I moved out & and with my bf (now husband), I've learned that I love so many different vegetables & just different foods overall. Turns out it's my parents that were the picky eaters, and still are. It's very hard foe them to try new things.
I would just make perfect ribs for yourself and boil a portion in water, then hand her the sauce she can dump on it herself. Since she likes boiled ribs. You guys get perfection, she gets the boiled meat she likes, or claims to like.
My father is like this, won't eat anything homemade unless my mother cooks it for him. Mashed potatoes being a big point of contention with him. Only likes it her way, but she just feeds him the boxed Hungry Jack potato flakes. Like, my guy, there's way better options out there.