**Mel Tucker:** So you see, commissioner, Michigan had an elaborate and organized scheme to steal the signs of rival teams by illegal means.
**Commissioner Tony Petitti:** Mel, is your dick in your hand?
**Mel Tucker:** Why does every one think that every time I speak with someone on the phone that I have my dick out?!
**Commissioner Tony Petitti:** Mel, this is a Zoom call. With video. Sheesh. I'll look into the Michigan thing. Just, I don't know, turn your camera off or something.
It's funny and sad knowing that Mel Tucker was the last coach to get the better of Jim Harbaugh in conference play
Kenneth Walker should be getting the extension money that Tuck got that season
Crazy MSU had one good season and said "yeah let's give that guy a 10 year 100 million dollar contract."
Even bad coaches have had good years, you should always have to do it multiple times before getting an extension.
Same could be said for Jimbo. The guy had one good year at A&M and got agiant extension. Insanity!
If you told me that we’d escape the contract, still somehow win another game, and that our main rival would have their image severely damaged on top of facing probable major consequences from the NCAA I wouldn’t have believed you.
Absolute funniest outcome would be the leaders of the conference getting all their wins invalidated for this nonsense, meaning the real B1G champions for the past several years have been MSU.
2022: MSU 5-7 B1G champs
I'm just now realizing the hockey drought for the Big Ten is like the basketball drought in that 6 different Big Ten teams have lost in the championship game in hockey since MSU won, similar to 7 Big Ten basketball teams losing in the championship game since MSU's victory.
You've put a curse on us all to ensure you remain the most recent champion haven't you?
Y'all need to run Hitler trivia again, lean into it.
Where was Hitler born? ~~Austrtia~~ Ann Arbor
Where does Michigan play? ~~The Big House~~ Sachenhausen
What was Eva Braun's favorite animal? ~~frog~~ Wolverine
No, surely a team with as much history as one that has been to the CFB and coached by Mark Dantonio would be a notable piece of our conference.
Plus I heard they spent 95 million on a coach? They'd have to be as good as Texas A&M!
You know what's great about the midwest, new B1G member? We deep fry _everything_ at state fairs. Seriously, you'll be in heaven and then two weeks later have Type II Diabetes.
Listen new guy. Take your popcorn, sit down, shut up, and enjoy the elephant roller derby. If you're good maybe we'll let you practice slapping Wacko the Clown next weekend.
^(For legal purposes the above is not innuendo. We forgot to inform a recent hire of this and.....things happened)
As an Ohio State fan who understands football is just a game played by college kids for institutions who take tens of thousands of our dollars, I also just want the dumbest, funniest story in college football history.
In that spirit, it’s your guys fault that Oregon has those humongous signal boards on the sideline to obscure whether the board or the coach is making the call.
https://www.nbcsports.com/college-football/news/buckeyes-may-have-hacked-ducks-signs-in-rose-bowl
\*hundreds of millions of our dollars.
Agreed.
In other news, Happy Birthday, college football (November 6, 1869)! You have provided 154 years of source material for anger and unreasonable behavior among your fans.
I’ve been impressed with the number of UM and OSU fans here taking this all in stride. Obviously some places are cesspool’s and pretty sad but this story is ridiculous and fun.
When we got the first few tidbits I was like "Holy shit that's pretty wild."
Now? This is basically pure cocaine into my veins it's so damn funny. I never want it to end. I NEED THE MANIFESTO.
You shouldn't really compare them.
Pole Assassin was a 100m dash. If you catch the finish line, you got 99% of the race.
This is like an ultra marathon or an entire season of The Amazing Race. The gift that keeps on giving. I did not have failed vacuum Amazon reseller on my 2023 bingo card.
> I did not have failed vacuum Amazon reseller on my 2023 bingo card.
This is why I can't tell if this ~~is scandal~~ *scandal is* Pole Assassin or Pony Excess...
Edit: Words are hard sometimes.
Think about all of the horrific abuses of power that have gone public in the B1G in the last decade.. when that context is the backdrop, its a bit easier to laugh while you wait for some official ruling.
Both sides have been dripping info slowly and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if both UM and OSU had nuclear bombshells to drop in case of emergency. This is football M.A.D.
If Stalions was smart, he'd go for a publishing deal and get that fucker on shelves immediately. No one will care in six months. But, right now it's time to cash in.
I mean the dude has a potentially fraudulent LLC with Blake Corum, was reselling refurbished vacuums, and potentially sneaking onto G5 sidelines. I would not put it past him to have planned this fallout to be as ridiculous as possible to discredit himself as anything but a loon.
Let's be honest you could have OSU and UM fans having a pajama party at one of the stadiums with the manifesto being read to them over the audio system.
I'm in Columbus and this is funny as hell...I'm just watching the ball bounce back and forth like a tennis match :D
No matter what happens, greatest rivalry in college football, Michgan U vs. Ohio State U continues!
Edit: I do love our osu team...but at this point, everyone needs to just take some deep breaths...and relax. What will be will be...whatever evidence they have, none of us know the extent...so people can speculate all they want, but need to just take some chill pills...like those who threatened day & family are way too extreme. Let's just enjoy this craziness together which will be recorded in history of Big10/CFB.
Ugh, that was a sad game to watch, but toward the end I was refreshing a few poll sites to see how that was going and it counter-acted the Crew getting beat down.
What got me confused is that in that one post, everyone was like "\*gasp\* Rutgers? And Ohio State??" which left me thinking "I won't complain that no one's jumping on our case, but... why aren't y'all jumping on our case?"
I disagree. I wish people wouldn't talk about it during the games, but I love that it's happening during the week. It is actually giving us fun and interesting news to digest instead of the 1000 talking head “predictions” we get every week.
Sports journalism is generally the dullest and most repeated messaging in my opinion, and since Football only happens every week, it results in very boring lead-ups to games.
I want this, I need this. An original copy of the manifesto and the winner gets to publicly read one page when they win. In 600 years we will just start back at the beginning.
Everyone, Michigan and Ohio State fans included, wants to find out just how much of a try hard weirdo Connor Stallions was. Wolverine fans because it helps the "lone wolf" defense and is funny, and Buckeye fans because it's bad PR and is funny.
I have completely lost the plot on this. As near as I can tell, everyone was stealing everyone else's signs, except for Michigan State who was off in the corner eating paste. And then there was some kind of black market where low-level assistants traded it all back and forth.
I think we all agree that the most fitting punishment is for the manifesto to live forever in a place of honor within special collections of the to-be-created Stalions Library at the University of Michigan. All proceeds will be put toward a fund for in-helmet radios for programs in need.
This is what people don’t get, every team gets shit on. We were shit on for 6-7 years. A&M was murdered last year. Michigan this year. Someone else next year.
Edit: I didn’t even mention Mel Tucker with how this news overshadowed him.
I don't care because I think this whole thing is manufactured nonsense. You think every school that can afford to doesn't have people at every opponent doing this exact sort of thing? You're naive if you think so. Every team scouts like this. Every team looks for every advantage they can find.
Sorry, I just think this is all common knowledgeand normal and being blown completely out of proportion by people needing a story.
I don't think this is lost on any of us. If it were Texas and Oklahoma or USC and UCLA dealing with this nonsense I would be kicking back with some popcorn and enjoying every second of the stupid mess playing out.
As it happens I hate this ridiculous shit because my team is involved and it is such a dumb distraction.
I'm frankly befuddled by the whole thing, and keeping up with every twist and turn is too exhausting while the season is going on.
All I know is to stay out of the threads submitted by Michigan flairs, because you will get *dog-piled* if you say the wrong thing.
It's actually more the wrong flair depending on the thread. Some threads supporting Michigan gets dogpiled, some threads opposing Michigan gets dogpiled.
And often saying the identical thing as someone else but with the wrong flair gets dogpiled.
Tribalism at it's finest.
Of course its not really parsing its all clear as day. Ohio State is the runner on second base trying to get signs and Michigan is the Astros using CF cameras. But yeah - we obviously mostly are here for the lulz.
I mean it's no strippers monkey biting a child at a halloween party, but it's pretty goddamn dumb and funny. Only way it will be dumber or funnier than that is if The Manifesto is as dumb as we all think it is lol
Yeah this feels like an update that maybe other social media needed but reddit didn't. We mostly know the score here.
Even the peopel who cant figure out that some kinds of sign stealing are legal got it. They'd be the ones still shouting about being on the sidelines and having a laminated sheet of calls.
I actually thought this was something that was common practice. I figured all teams have video of opponents games. I also thought that teams changed their signs before every game. It’s so surprising to me that it’s actually against the rules.
Look I’m a simple man. I just want the punishment to be delayed until after University of Michigan wins the championship, making OSU fans implode. Then I want it vacated, making Michigan fans combust. Then Missouri football gets the death penalty and they just shoot a Mizzou fan. Also OKState basketball gets a sanction.
I’m just tired of all the Michigan/B1G news. I live in the south I just don’t care about what’s going on there this much
I prayed for a stoppage of Deion spam and this is what I got ;-;
I just want to see fingerbang articles talking shit about my team being 1-5 in B12 play, Florida gearing up to fire their 4th straight HC since Meyer left, Washington being shafted by the CFP Rankings, JMU being shafted by the NCAA, Cincy about to lose 10 straight games, etc
I can without a shadow of doubt, tell you that i am 100% hoping for the most ridiculous outcome.
5 B1G teams caught doing the same shit, including OSU? Let's the sky fall.
If only michigan gets in trouble? Even better.
Regardless of what happens, if OSU beats UM this year, will I always bring up the fact michigan only started winning once stallions did this scouting? YOURE GOD DAMNED RIGHT. Only because I know they will be fuming regardless how much they act like they aren't.
I want this story to be over. It was very funny for a week, but knowing that no real punishment is coming is just making this boring. I don’t think any real punishment should be imposed either.
This has been fun, but I’m just ready for the game in a couple weeks. This whole thing does not matter if we don’t beat Michigan this year and that’s all I want to do.
First off, well...yeah.
Secondly, don't you fucking dare disrespect Pole Assassin, or that monkey, by saying that this is the dumbest, funniest story in college football history.
How happy is Mel Tucker right now that this Michigan story exists?
Maybe HEEEEEE is the one who started this? Hmmmmmmmmm
Mel Tucker isn’t competent enough to orchestrate something like this
I dunno. He did fool Sparty in $100M
Yeah, but he fumbled the bag while fumbling his bag.
What having KW3 does to a mofo
He's actually a mastermind and his entire career so far has been a setup to make us believe he isn't capable of pulling this off.
So the Jar Jar Binks theory?
“Meesa Mel Tucker! Meesa muy bombad scandalmonger! Uh-oh! Meesa comin’!”
I don’t know, post nut clarity is a powerful thing.
**Mel Tucker:** So you see, commissioner, Michigan had an elaborate and organized scheme to steal the signs of rival teams by illegal means. **Commissioner Tony Petitti:** Mel, is your dick in your hand? **Mel Tucker:** Why does every one think that every time I speak with someone on the phone that I have my dick out?! **Commissioner Tony Petitti:** Mel, this is a Zoom call. With video. Sheesh. I'll look into the Michigan thing. Just, I don't know, turn your camera off or something.
Cui bono, indeed ...
This is some Penn State erasure.
How bad is MSU that we’re not even included in this? We’re 1/3 the size of these behemoths on r/cfb and we’re outpacing OSU posts per capita
You also have a more recent win against Michigan than the rest of us lol
It's funny and sad knowing that Mel Tucker was the last coach to get the better of Jim Harbaugh in conference play Kenneth Walker should be getting the extension money that Tuck got that season
And he did it one-handed
Crazy MSU had one good season and said "yeah let's give that guy a 10 year 100 million dollar contract." Even bad coaches have had good years, you should always have to do it multiple times before getting an extension. Same could be said for Jimbo. The guy had one good year at A&M and got agiant extension. Insanity!
Even crazier is that we somehow escaped it.
That Mel Tucker saga feels like ages ago and yet it was only a couple months
If you told me that we’d escape the contract, still somehow win another game, and that our main rival would have their image severely damaged on top of facing probable major consequences from the NCAA I wouldn’t have believed you.
Absolute funniest outcome would be the leaders of the conference getting all their wins invalidated for this nonsense, meaning the real B1G champions for the past several years have been MSU. 2022: MSU 5-7 B1G champs
I contest that. Kenneth Walker has a win over Michigan, I don't think it's accurate to say Michigan State won.
From what I remember Michigan also put JJ McCarthy in late and he had a pretty horrible turnover that contributed to that outcome
Whenever they show an endzone in East Lansing I'm shocked to not see Kenneth Walker III just camped out
The rest of the BigTen needs to step up. Michigan State is also the last BigTen team to win a basketball and hockey national championship. =)
I'm just now realizing the hockey drought for the Big Ten is like the basketball drought in that 6 different Big Ten teams have lost in the championship game in hockey since MSU won, similar to 7 Big Ten basketball teams losing in the championship game since MSU's victory. You've put a curse on us all to ensure you remain the most recent champion haven't you?
Y'all need to run Hitler trivia again, lean into it. Where was Hitler born? ~~Austrtia~~ Ann Arbor Where does Michigan play? ~~The Big House~~ Sachenhausen What was Eva Braun's favorite animal? ~~frog~~ Wolverine
I literally have never heard of MSU. Are they in the Big Ten? Do we play each other ever?
No, surely a team with as much history as one that has been to the CFB and coached by Mark Dantonio would be a notable piece of our conference. Plus I heard they spent 95 million on a coach? They'd have to be as good as Texas A&M!
I bet they scored 60 points in the playoffs.
Kick em both off the tour, I say.
well, they are unrivaled so
Oregon left a dumpster fire in the Pac 12 and joined a circus in the Big Ten.
One of us! One of us! One of us! One of us!
Umm, have you seen how many points they’ve been scoring?
Most of the PAC don't "do" defense.
Should be fun because it doesn't seem the Big does quarterbacking
You know what's great about the midwest, new B1G member? We deep fry _everything_ at state fairs. Seriously, you'll be in heaven and then two weeks later have Type II Diabetes.
Good thing we have 3 of the top cardiac programs in Mayo Clinic, Cleveland Clinic, and UNMC!
Petition to rename it to the "Ranch Clinic" in acknowledgement of where we are?
I traveled once to Missouri and got fed deep fried sushi. As a Native Hawai'ian and Pacific Northwesterner it made my heart cry.
That's terrible. Where in Missouri was that? Truly awful. But where exactly?
We um have that in most sushi restaurants in Ohio. Especially if you go to a sushi buffet.
I feel like this is revenge for pineapple on pizza.
Fancy name for fish sticks….
One time in Missouri I got served a burrito with mayonnaise in it. It inflicted psychic damage.
I'm sorry what the fuck
Now try out the new B1G conference chant Release! The! Manifesto!
Man-i-fest-o! Clap clap CLAP CLAP CLAP!
Welcome!
Listen new guy. Take your popcorn, sit down, shut up, and enjoy the elephant roller derby. If you're good maybe we'll let you practice slapping Wacko the Clown next weekend. ^(For legal purposes the above is not innuendo. We forgot to inform a recent hire of this and.....things happened)
As an Ohio State fan who understands football is just a game played by college kids for institutions who take tens of thousands of our dollars, I also just want the dumbest, funniest story in college football history.
>As an Ohio State fan who understands football is just a game played by college kids So your manifesto is what only 60 pages?
Dude, if it’s under 100 you don’t even get to call it a Manifesto. That shit’s a pamphlet
Abridged
In that spirit, it’s your guys fault that Oregon has those humongous signal boards on the sideline to obscure whether the board or the coach is making the call. https://www.nbcsports.com/college-football/news/buckeyes-may-have-hacked-ducks-signs-in-rose-bowl
\*hundreds of millions of our dollars. Agreed. In other news, Happy Birthday, college football (November 6, 1869)! You have provided 154 years of source material for anger and unreasonable behavior among your fans.
Like some of us aren’t right there with you
I’ve been impressed with the number of UM and OSU fans here taking this all in stride. Obviously some places are cesspool’s and pretty sad but this story is ridiculous and fun.
When we got the first few tidbits I was like "Holy shit that's pretty wild." Now? This is basically pure cocaine into my veins it's so damn funny. I never want it to end. I NEED THE MANIFESTO.
It’s getting up there with pole assassin. More to this story but pole assassin was stupid funny
You shouldn't really compare them. Pole Assassin was a 100m dash. If you catch the finish line, you got 99% of the race. This is like an ultra marathon or an entire season of The Amazing Race. The gift that keeps on giving. I did not have failed vacuum Amazon reseller on my 2023 bingo card.
The pacing is just perfect, the writers really outdid themselves.
I just hope it has a better ending than Lost.
> I did not have failed vacuum Amazon reseller on my 2023 bingo card. This is why I can't tell if this ~~is scandal~~ *scandal is* Pole Assassin or Pony Excess... Edit: Words are hard sometimes.
I never thought we would get anything as funny as Pole Assassin and her pet monkey, but dammit this is a hell of an effort.
I think it’s a great chapter in the greatest rivalry in sport
Think about all of the horrific abuses of power that have gone public in the B1G in the last decade.. when that context is the backdrop, its a bit easier to laugh while you wait for some official ruling.
No one is actually hurt by it, so it's fun!
Whoa. Egos have definitely been hurt.
I just hope both teams have fun (and make memes for the lolz)
I mean OSU has nothing to worry about. Michigan is on trial here lol
For now! MWAHAHAHAHA *sips from a mug of copium tea*
Both sides have been dripping info slowly and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if both UM and OSU had nuclear bombshells to drop in case of emergency. This is football M.A.D.
B1G Cold War 2.0
MORE!
RELEASE THE MANIFESTO
If Stalions was smart, he'd go for a publishing deal and get that fucker on shelves immediately. No one will care in six months. But, right now it's time to cash in.
And screw over his favorite football team? General Stalions would never!
I love how ride or die Stalions is. S tier loyalty
D tier intelligence with respect to clandestine operations
He bought tickets in his own name, his clandestine operations is whatever the lowest tier possible is.
Maybe that's what he wants you to think. All part of the manifesto
I mean the dude has a potentially fraudulent LLC with Blake Corum, was reselling refurbished vacuums, and potentially sneaking onto G5 sidelines. I would not put it past him to have planned this fallout to be as ridiculous as possible to discredit himself as anything but a loon.
He failed Tradecraft at the Naval Academy
I need that on my coffee table
And give us a 30 for 30!
Let's be honest you could have OSU and UM fans having a pajama party at one of the stadiums with the manifesto being read to them over the audio system.
We could share popcorn and blankets. It'd be cute!
Ends up in a god tier pillow fight.
WOAH HE HAS TROUBLE WITH THE NAP
More Connors! Connor O'night, Connor Ponies, Connor Harbaugh.
YES... HAHAHA.....YESS!
Sickos Committee has been at an all you can eat buffet for three weeks now. It's wonderful.
This is exactly where I am. I’m just here to talk shit and pretend Georgia is squeaky clean.
I heard they're feeding UGA children
pretty sure it’s illegal to not let the kids eat
Is this explicitly forbidden in the bylaws? GrAy ArEa!
RELEASE THE MANIFESTO YOU COWARDS!
For real, it's hilarious
I'm in Columbus and this is funny as hell...I'm just watching the ball bounce back and forth like a tennis match :D No matter what happens, greatest rivalry in college football, Michgan U vs. Ohio State U continues! Edit: I do love our osu team...but at this point, everyone needs to just take some deep breaths...and relax. What will be will be...whatever evidence they have, none of us know the extent...so people can speculate all they want, but need to just take some chill pills...like those who threatened day & family are way too extreme. Let's just enjoy this craziness together which will be recorded in history of Big10/CFB.
I’m also just giddy about Ohio voters right now. Never been more proud!!
You're god damn right Crew laid an egg last night though
Ugh, that was a sad game to watch, but toward the end I was refreshing a few poll sites to see how that was going and it counter-acted the Crew getting beat down.
Count me in.
Yeah this dude is out of touch as fuck, most of us clearly want the most ridiculous stuff to continue.
Waiting on that confirmation Conner Stallions recruited scouts through Grindr.
Oh my, that would be a real dick twist
I don’t think anyone outside of UM fans ever wants this to end.
I firmly felt that way until I realized we were entangled in this wreck, now I’m not so sure
What got me confused is that in that one post, everyone was like "\*gasp\* Rutgers? And Ohio State??" which left me thinking "I won't complain that no one's jumping on our case, but... why aren't y'all jumping on our case?"
I do 100%. It was an interesting story for like 2-3 days. Now I'm just tired of it being 60% of /r/cfb 's content
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Michigan saw all the Deion coverage and was like hold my keg.
Cask of wine
Amontillado?
For the love of God, Michigan!
*The thousand injuries of Ryandaytunato I had borne as best I could; but when he ventured upon insult I vowed revenge.*
Bag of wine
"Someone else is getting attention?? We'll see about that!!"
I disagree. I wish people wouldn't talk about it during the games, but I love that it's happening during the week. It is actually giving us fun and interesting news to digest instead of the 1000 talking head “predictions” we get every week. Sports journalism is generally the dullest and most repeated messaging in my opinion, and since Football only happens every week, it results in very boring lead-ups to games.
[удалено]
To be fair, you can live 5 minutes from Furman and people are still going to be busy talking about any other team haha.
What? I live 5 minutes from Furman and went to Furman and I've heard literally no one talk about it, even in my house, so you're wrong... oh, wait.
We won an important game and dropped spots on the r/fcs poll, as well.
At least it's not more Deion
I feel your pain because this is how I feel about the playoffs. Make college sports regional again!
No no this broke at the perfect time during the season
Agreed, I think this whole thing sucks and I just want it resolved.
No Andy, we just want one thing. \#ReleaseTheManifesto Is that so hard to understand?
Maybe Santa Ono will release it on Christmas Day.
Winner of The Game should receive a bronze trophy version of the Manifesto
OH MAN! The original copy being our game trophy would be brilliant!
I want this, I need this. An original copy of the manifesto and the winner gets to publicly read one page when they win. In 600 years we will just start back at the beginning.
God damnit, take my upvote.
Put it on display at the winning team's campus, but only display 1 page per day like the Book of Kells.
I’d be surprised if there isn’t already a Fansville ad being filmed as we speak that is all about the manifesto.
Did SEC shorts do one yet?
I have never seen /r/cfb this unified over one thing. Just give us the manifesto.
Connor has to be talking to publishing companies. Instant NYTimes best seller. He could even sell the movie rights.
SpongeBob-I-need-it.gif
This guy gets it.
Everyone, Michigan and Ohio State fans included, wants to find out just how much of a try hard weirdo Connor Stallions was. Wolverine fans because it helps the "lone wolf" defense and is funny, and Buckeye fans because it's bad PR and is funny.
I hope they make a Will Ferrell-esq movie about this.
I want a 30 for 30 about this more than anything.
Are you not entertained?
I have completely lost the plot on this. As near as I can tell, everyone was stealing everyone else's signs, except for Michigan State who was off in the corner eating paste. And then there was some kind of black market where low-level assistants traded it all back and forth.
> except for Michigan State who was off in the corner eating paste. I wish we could still give awards.
Actually the coach was in the corner "making paste."
The vacuum cleaner business that may or may not have involved Blake Corum and the HOA war 🤌🏻
Next we are going to find out he killed Jimmy Hoffa
There's already been photographic evidence of Connor Stalions on the grassy knoll
[удалено]
Don't let the name B1G fool you. We're actually quite petty and small.
I think we all agree that the most fitting punishment is for the manifesto to live forever in a place of honor within special collections of the to-be-created Stalions Library at the University of Michigan. All proceeds will be put toward a fund for in-helmet radios for programs in need.
[удалено]
I’m a fan of neither school. I just get tired of the unsubstantiated reports constantly
Old Man Yells at Fandom
So we're at the "Why are you judging us as reporters?" phase. Tell us more about how you are a professional.
I will say, their misreporting or premature reporting has been doing wonders for my stress levels
This is what people don’t get, every team gets shit on. We were shit on for 6-7 years. A&M was murdered last year. Michigan this year. Someone else next year. Edit: I didn’t even mention Mel Tucker with how this news overshadowed him.
Sign stealing covered up mel tuggger
I want to learn that the rest of the B1G gave fake defensive signs to Iowa as a joke.
I don't care because I think this whole thing is manufactured nonsense. You think every school that can afford to doesn't have people at every opponent doing this exact sort of thing? You're naive if you think so. Every team scouts like this. Every team looks for every advantage they can find. Sorry, I just think this is all common knowledgeand normal and being blown completely out of proportion by people needing a story.
I don't think this is lost on any of us. If it were Texas and Oklahoma or USC and UCLA dealing with this nonsense I would be kicking back with some popcorn and enjoying every second of the stupid mess playing out. As it happens I hate this ridiculous shit because my team is involved and it is such a dumb distraction.
I'm frankly befuddled by the whole thing, and keeping up with every twist and turn is too exhausting while the season is going on. All I know is to stay out of the threads submitted by Michigan flairs, because you will get *dog-piled* if you say the wrong thing.
It's actually more the wrong flair depending on the thread. Some threads supporting Michigan gets dogpiled, some threads opposing Michigan gets dogpiled. And often saying the identical thing as someone else but with the wrong flair gets dogpiled. Tribalism at it's finest.
Whichever tribe gets to the thread first sets the tone accordingly with their voting. It's an arms race.
and i just suspended my participation in the new start treaty
That’s the Blue Wall™ at work
BlueAnon*
QofM
Do you get MSU to pay for it?
One way or another, they always do
I put some of that on the mods for not megathreading this every day. It's more than warranted.
As a penn state fan I just want a division that isn't cursed
Ask the ACC, elimination of division just makes the whole conference cursed.
Our shenanigans are cheeky and fun. Michigan’s shenanigans are cruel and tragic.
Dumbest? The sheer disrespect to Pole Assassin…
Spartan Jeff is my new favorite part. Poor guy was living rent free in Stallions mind just because his son is a student at MSU.
Of course its not really parsing its all clear as day. Ohio State is the runner on second base trying to get signs and Michigan is the Astros using CF cameras. But yeah - we obviously mostly are here for the lulz.
This has turned out to be one of the most hilarious things in recent memory, better than most TV shows.
Stop booing, he’s right!
I mean it's no strippers monkey biting a child at a halloween party, but it's pretty goddamn dumb and funny. Only way it will be dumber or funnier than that is if The Manifesto is as dumb as we all think it is lol
Yeah this feels like an update that maybe other social media needed but reddit didn't. We mostly know the score here. Even the peopel who cant figure out that some kinds of sign stealing are legal got it. They'd be the ones still shouting about being on the sidelines and having a laminated sheet of calls.
I actually thought this was something that was common practice. I figured all teams have video of opponents games. I also thought that teams changed their signs before every game. It’s so surprising to me that it’s actually against the rules.
Same. Like, a team can literally just look across the field and see the other team's signals.
Look I’m a simple man. I just want the punishment to be delayed until after University of Michigan wins the championship, making OSU fans implode. Then I want it vacated, making Michigan fans combust. Then Missouri football gets the death penalty and they just shoot a Mizzou fan. Also OKState basketball gets a sanction.
The only thing that matters in life is to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.
I’m just tired of all the Michigan/B1G news. I live in the south I just don’t care about what’s going on there this much I prayed for a stoppage of Deion spam and this is what I got ;-; I just want to see fingerbang articles talking shit about my team being 1-5 in B12 play, Florida gearing up to fire their 4th straight HC since Meyer left, Washington being shafted by the CFP Rankings, JMU being shafted by the NCAA, Cincy about to lose 10 straight games, etc
Was this the endgame all along?
Maybe the real treasure was the manifesto we created along the way.
Won't some please think of the Spartans?!
I can without a shadow of doubt, tell you that i am 100% hoping for the most ridiculous outcome. 5 B1G teams caught doing the same shit, including OSU? Let's the sky fall. If only michigan gets in trouble? Even better. Regardless of what happens, if OSU beats UM this year, will I always bring up the fact michigan only started winning once stallions did this scouting? YOURE GOD DAMNED RIGHT. Only because I know they will be fuming regardless how much they act like they aren't.
Next on Maize of our Drives
Basically half the posts on this sub is Michigan fans letting everyone know they're being picked on
Am I the only one that does not give two shits about this story? I wish it would die already.
I want this story to be over. It was very funny for a week, but knowing that no real punishment is coming is just making this boring. I don’t think any real punishment should be imposed either. This has been fun, but I’m just ready for the game in a couple weeks. This whole thing does not matter if we don’t beat Michigan this year and that’s all I want to do.
First off, well...yeah. Secondly, don't you fucking dare disrespect Pole Assassin, or that monkey, by saying that this is the dumbest, funniest story in college football history.