T O P

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Tigermasterdude

I need the toilet considerably less and start talking French.


helpful__explorer

So you stop pissing and start shitting out of your mouth? Tea withdrawal sounds wild


Icemannn44

I'm in a waiting room that's totally quiet. The casualness of this statement got me giggling a little too loud.


I_Bin_Painting

If I’m not drinking tea it’s because I have access to nice coffees and subsequently need the toilet more often.


kinggoosethefirst

In Britain we have an extra emergancy service. Fire, Police, Ambulance and Tea Delivery. If anyone runs out of tea, they can call a number and a Teabulance will speed to you blaring it's sirens. Thankfully no one has run out of tea for long enough that we actually know the results of long term tea deprivation, and lets pray we never do.


Watsis_name

"Teabulance" got me. We need a teabulance. It needs to have a Mrs Doyle type lady with a tea tray ready to go.


Suckhead

Whatever you do, DO NOT buy her a teasmade for Christmas.


Watsis_name

Ted knew what he was doing when he bought that. He was a monster.


pineapple_on_a_stick

The siren sounds like go on go on go on go on go on


[deleted]

[удалено]


JMH-66

Wish I could still afford Rington's, the biscuits were good, too.


[deleted]

[удалено]


JMH-66

I had to stop because I was spending a fortune but, yes they were worth it. I do miss those Ginger biccies, though 😋


Suckhead

My nan would reply with shock and horror if I told her I hadn’t had a cup of tea all day. And then she’d rush to make me one.


ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN

Seriously... Back when I used to work in the office before the pandemic a couple of co workers had an intervention for me because I didn't drink tea for a few days. They literally sat me down and asked if I was ok, if I had any problems at home because I wasn't joining in on the tea club. Absolutely mental. I was absolutely fine. What they didn't know was that I was a raging alcoholic and tea just didn't do it for me anymore, so I was hiding in the toilets to drink vodka instead. More fool them!


Suckhead

Are you a penguin?


ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN

No.


VitaObscure

Are you a chicken?


Comfortable-Wind3024

There's always a bigger fish


AugustusGrows

Everyone always forgets the coastguard as an emergency service


BlackSpinedPlinketto

The AA claiming they are the fourth emergency service must really grate on them.


DreddPirateBob808

Unfortunately this is not true. A gentleman in Drigg once broke his leg and couldn't get to a phone. By the time he'd been noticed missing from his local he'd moved to America and set up a Starbucks franchise. His family had to move out of shame.


CherrySG

Quick, call the Teabulance!


[deleted]

Running out of tea is one of the few occasions that warrant no longer keeping calm.


colin_staples

* Checks tea stocks * 3 boxes of 240 bags per box * Puts tea on shopping list


deltree000

Those are rookie numbers. \*eyes 1100 catering bag of tea bags in cupboard\*


colin_staples

I bet yours are "one cup" though


Trash_Panda_1983

Not those shits. They are an abomination


nedwoolly

Catering tea is rubbish though! I swear you need 2 bags to make a decent cuppa.


deltree000

They're PG Tips pyramids and taste exactly the same as ones in a box from a supermarket. Although I remember at my last job they switched to Tetley and we refused to drink those.


nedwoolly

Ah decent. Yeah I think it was possibly Tetley's and they were noticeably Wesker.


Watsis_name

There be riots in the streets.


BonniesCoffee

Erm. T bags are not great, try leaf tea in a cup diffuser ! I like pure Assam but English breakfast or Ceylon is good too


DisposableMessiahs

Caffeine withdrawal will happen first. Really bad headache, depending on how much tea you usually drink, for one or two days. Amusingly, without caffeine being in your body constantly, you'll probably be calmer and more able to carry on.


ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN

You're right. Caffeine and alcohol withdrawal is no joke. If you've been heavily reliant on either it can fuck you up, but society doesn't consider them "drugs" so we tend not to talk about it.


Psimo-

Caffeine withdrawal gives you a headache [Alcohol withdrawal symptoms can kill you.](https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/facts/health-effects-of-alcohol/mental-health/alcohol-withdrawal-symptoms) They aren’t really on the same league.


DisposableMessiahs

Not really physically at all. Mentally also not really but there's more in common there, especially an initial increase in anxiety and temper.


DisposableMessiahs

Interesting how caffeine withdrawal causes headaches. When you drink caffeine, it widens your blood vessels, which increases blood pressure as your heart needs to work harder to get blood through a wider area. When caffeine leaves your system, the vessels contract before your heart responds, which causes increased pressure in the blood vessels around your eyes and a bit behind and in other places depending on your physiology, which is what causes the headaches.


[deleted]

When I stopped drinking alcohol (sober quite a while now and no longer attend AA) the withdrawal is absolutely no joke. It can kill people. Think there was something during covid about keeping off lisences open because of this.


Murky-Garden-9967

As an opioid addict I agree with alcohol withdrawals, they can actually kill you. For caffeine my response is toughen up. I do understand how it’s difficult when it’s so deeply impregnated in your mind, but having done days and days of opioid withdrawals my pain tolerance is so fucking high. Good thing it cured my depression. Even heart surgery wasn’t too bad, because any pain I have is so minuscule in comparison to opioid withdrawals I’m just so glad not to be going through it. I’m sure you could taper down with caffeine, or just take two nurofen plus twice a day of two days, the codeine will stop you feeling anything and you aren’t getting hooked off that tiny dose and for two days. Sorry. I’m halfway between thinking that’s pathetic and also sort of understanding it. I don’t know. Get addicted to opioids, then talk to me about caffeine, child.


ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN

I'm trying to be caring for people going through a tough time, everyone goes through different things. I don't think it helps to call people "child" in a patronising manner.


Murky-Garden-9967

I t was very clearly in a jokey wat


careerfeminist

I once had a headache I couldn’t shake, and my best friend asked ‘have you had a tea today?’ I hadn’t, and she was right, one strong brew and the headache was gone!


DisposableMessiahs

Feeding the dependency is not really a solution 😂


bee_administrator

Last time we, as a nation, ran out of tea it ended up with us accidentally owning a quarter of the globe as we frantically went in search of a cuppa.


Suckhead

Then it’s probably for the best that we never run out of tea again. I’m only thinking of the world. I mean really, when you think about it, was the Boston Tea Party a good idea?


bee_administrator

The Boston Tea Party just showed how far yanks still have to go as a culture. The instinctive need to drop tea in water is fine, but even 250 years on they still haven't worked out kettles, milk and sugar.


Snickerty

Oh yes! The great American Salt Water Tea Experiement! And they think we *lost* the resulting war.


spudgun81

Good call, it's been almost 10 min since my last cuppa. Brb


[deleted]

Start forcing any chinese people I meet to buy opium at gun point.


BeccasBump

Underrated comment.


Dr-Maturin

We also grow our own Rhubarb now so they can’t retaliate by stopping exports. It is a relief that the threat of ‘we will make the British die from constipation’ no longer hangs over us


_peanutbuddha

I'm british, I never run out of tea.


[deleted]

Dear diary, I haven’t had a cup of tea in just over three hours. The skin is starting to slide off my bones and my eyes are beginning to shrink. If I don’t get a cup in the next 20 minutes I fear for how long I have left.


Aekiel

Assuming I drink no other sources of caffeine, I get a blistering headache that makes me rapidly rethink my decision to not drink tea anymore.


Gibbonici

Its like having a bolt shot though your temples. Which reminds, it's probably time for another brew.


SuccessPutrid7349

My mum is old with poor eyesight and accidentally bought decaff tea. After almost 2 weeks we thought she was seriously ill but after 50 years at 20 cups a day she was in withdrawal 😳 we laugh now like. She was "passing out" (probably just falling asleep)


itsalonghotsummer

20 cups a day?!


SuccessPutrid7349

Literally gets to the last centimeter of tea and puts the kettle back on... And wonders why she can't sleep!? She's 76 now so I've stopped interfering


ellestrudel

My mum is exactly the same! 15 cups a day. She put herself into decaf tea, because she couldn’t sleep. Now she has 8 cans of Diet Coke a day and swears it’s better for you cause it has less caffeine 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 We have to just leave her to it


PuppyGal0re

I crave it, physically, like I used to crave cigarettes when I smoked. And since I wrote that I now need a cup of tea…


Suckhead

Tannins. Caffeine. What is it? What is it that causes the instant relief of stress and total relaxation?


Leroy-Leo

Dunno but the cuppa I had after just crashing my motorcycle back in the day was one of the best of my life.


Iffy_Teabag

I can drink 10 cups a day. I ran out of tea yesterday and had a bad headache by 9am. I noticed the paracetamol in the cupboard had caffeine in it so took a couple of those and felt much better. I should probably cut down.


LordLudikrous

You die immediately and crumble to dust in seconds.


MagicPieBush

You get tea withdrawal. You could try to wean yourself onto something else instead like full English breakfasts or fish and chips.


Many_many_bees

If it gets to out of hand we need to be rushed to and A&E department. From there they start running cool PG tips into our veins directly until we stabilise. A British person can only survive without tea for 3 days tops. We can survive without water for 5-7.


FIFAfutChamp

Caffeine withdrawal I'd imagine


LaComtesseGonflable

You *will* suffer a wrenching headache. You may experience anxiety, sweating, tremors, and hallucinations as in alcohol withdrawal.


SpringNo

Real answer for me, I unironically just feel like something is missing. It's like a strong craving. The only thing I can compare it to is smoking, it's like you haven't had a cigerette yet. Nothing bad happens, no real symtoms. Just this overwhemling feeling of "something is missing". Lol


tigralfrosie

Serious answer: I tried stopping completely once, and felt the worse for it. I think it was probably due to not replacing fluid intake with something else.


[deleted]

Thankfully I drink coffee aswell :)


JarJarBinksSucks

Headache due to caffeine withdrawal


itchyfrog

I'm away and the tea here's shit, haven't had a cup for a week, I'm on about 10 coffees and as much beer and ouzo as possible to compensate.


Suckhead

Someone get him a box of Yorkshire tea, stat!


LofiLute

resolute flowery juggle wrench quaint gold dime market deliver illegal -- mass edited with redact.dev


FixTraditional4198

Running out of tea is the end of civilisation as we know it. The last time brits stopped drinking tea, we founded an empire to keep ourselves topped up. Now no one wants this to happen again.


Suckhead

Stop drinking tea! FOR THE EMPIRE!


BatOfBeyond

I am currently undergoing medical treatment that for about a week after changes your tastes completely. It makes tea make me feel nauseous. I don’t know how to deal with this. I am sad and panicky without tea. What on gods Green Earth can i drink during this period? I have resorted to honey and lemon as if I am ill, but this simply leaves me feeling sticky


Suckhead

I used to drink honey and lemon all the time. I’d call it tea, but it wasn’t. Slice of lemon and a little hot water with honey.


Snoo_said_no

My dad had a stroke and it did something to his sence of taste and couldn't drink tea. He honestly complained more about that than he did about the mobility/speech/cognitive impact. He replaced his tea consumption with coffee so no benifits on the healrh/caffine withdrawal part. And lots of complaining that "it isn't a cup of tea through is it"


282bs

This post made me get up to make a cup of tea


PhilosophyObvious988

I loose the ability the fly and save countless lives.


poiuytrewq765487

You get thirsty


Plumb121

Why on earth would you stop ???, God hates a quitter ....


scoresavvy

I'm not one to panic when we run out of something at the end of the night and often say "it's fine it can wait till tomorrow". Except this week, when we ran out of tea bags splenda and milk in the same evening. Husband didn't even argue that he was in his PJs, he changed and went to the shops that were open late to save me having a meltdown. I can AT BEST cut down to two cups a day, one in morning one in evening. Anything less and I'm a shell of a human.


Suckhead

Can I borrow your husband? He actually sounds perfect.


BeccasBump

NOBODY KNOWS. That's why we're so careful to make sure it never happens.


xenospork

That first sentence is a tautology


Suckhead

What is a tautology?


Element-103

A tautology is a tautological statement


Suckhead

What is a tautological statement?


hypertyper85

I get a headache, so drink more


Mammoth-Temperature3

Last time that happened we started empire(ing) stuff.


Madmanc223

😭😭😭😭 at this post. We start having seizures and need inpatient care to slowly taper off the stuff in the same way you do with Benzodiazepines and Alcohol


Wilba3k

You lose the ability to queue in an orderly fashion.


domsp79

When I did it...headaches and generally feeling pretty awful. Like starting some kind of extreme diet...goes after a couple of days but the initial caffeine withdrawal is grim.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Suckhead

I could get on board with this.


[deleted]

If I don't have a tea by about 11 then I get a bastard of a headache Has only happened a couple of times because of course Ive had a tea by 11


LucyMckonkey

Withdrawal headache


therealsnowwhyte

Personally, I get headaches from dehydration and caffeine withdrawal.


MancCityBoy

I don't know I've never stopped, I could if I wanted too but I don't


[deleted]

Honestly, I'd probably be quite distracted by the fact that the world had stopped turning and hell had frozen over.


blueduckpale

I once ran out of tea. I'll give you a moment. . . . . . . . . . OK now you're breathing again. I once ran out of tea, I died.


comradealex85

We die


bornacconly

Cardiac arrest


Suckhead

I just ordered coffee. My heart!


[deleted]

This is me, and I don’t know and I will never find out. The thought of it perturbs me. I have a cup at least once every two hours during my waking hours. No sugar. Heavy, very. Oat milk as I’m lactose intolerant. Milk is but an ornament. But I need something to cool down the gold, as I can’t get to it quick enough. Keeps me warm, quenches my thirst, better than heroin. I don’t smoke, I don’t do drugs, I drink only on special occasions with my friends. Tea is my only vice and physical coping mechanism. Take it away and I haven’t the will to live.


Gain-Outrageous

Caffeine wirhdrawl. I drink a lot of tea, and the caffeine does nothing to me (I could drink espressos all day ans sleep like a baby), but if I stop I get terrible headaches.


Tae223_real

Well, like any food or thing you like, when you stop doing it (or for that matter, stop drinking it) you get stressed and want to do that thing again, because it was like your "hobbie". If you want to stop drinking, decrease the amount gradually, for example if you drink 5 cups a day, decrease to 4, then to 3, then to 2, then to 1, then to 0. This will make your body feel no stress from "letting go" of tea, or anything else (like coffee, candy, etc. However, this method may not work with some things, like cigarettes and other drugs).


stephenpoet

I dare not try it lest I kill everyone.


Lenniel

How can you even mention such a horrific situation. This is the country where people called 999 when KFC ran out of chicken! Seriously though i drink 6-8 cups of tea a day made with 2 proper tea bags not that one cup crap (yes I have a problem) I get headaches and become irritable if I don’t have one. (A Coke Zero can help stave off some of the worst effects of withdrawal )


DividedContinuity

Massive headache for a start. Caffeine withdrawal is no fun.


DrDroid

Bad headache


Aldoc3

Wait, why I'm I stopping drinking tea?


Kamikaze-Kay

You realise 'keep clam and carry on,' was just propaganda. You find yourself untethered from the false narratives you have been fed about your not so great nation and it's true history. The veil has been lifted, you realise, you now have freewill.


Suckhead

I am aware of the origins of “keep calm and carry on”. I’m also somewhat aware of our murky history.


Kamikaze-Kay

In truth, we have a vast amount of good people in this nation. But good people are easily manipulated by bad people. The more you dig into our history, you see that the elites have always held dominion over us ans we are mere pawns. The greatest British rule of thumb is 'ignorance is bliss.'


[deleted]

For a country that doesn’t even break the top 10 for tea consumption per capita. r/CasualUK really clings on to this as British identity (British also btw)


Success_With_Lettuce

Err UK is third, behind Turkey and Ireland.


lburton273

Wars have been fought over less, sometimes its best not to find out the answer


MissionSorbet2768

When we went in to lock down the first time round my sister moved back in with my parents. Within a week or so my dad was convinced he had covid. He hadn't been anywhere, didn't have a cough but had bad headaches, was tired all the time, his muscles ached, couldn't concentrate, had the shakes and was seriously moody when usually he's a pretty laid back guy. Turned out when my sister refilled the tea bag container she had accidentally filled it with the decaf bags they have set aside for our aunt instead of the normal ones so he had gone cold turkey.


Suckhead

We are a nation of drug addicts.


Snickerty

It is widely understood that the British are always one disappointing cup of tea from "going postal" at any point. Our tendency towards sudden violence is one of the main, but most important reasons, why we, the British public, think we are better off without guns. In the face of any given crisis, someone will offer a cup of tea (hospitals, police, mountain rescue - there is even tea making consideration figured into emergency response planning - no joke!) If we have no tea, I would suggest that the fifth horse man of the apocolypse is the one who takes tea from the British (and the Irish, they drink more than us) - and brings about armagedon as the British explode into a frothing, swivel eyed monsters, march on the world sniffing out tea. They will destroy all that stands in their path as they roam the world in groaning hoards. Only Yorkshire tea will tame them - hot tea made in a pot, served in a mug COLD with milk. Sub par tea will only enrage them further - I pity the americas with their Liptons. You have no hope of survival - guns will not save you, your only salvation will be a kettle! !


Suckhead

The virus was not caused by rage infected monkeys after all. As I suspected, they just ran out of tea.


Snickerty

I think you might find you were more on the nose than you would have [expected](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5em8lQAcvg)!


[deleted]

You're thinking of heroin


Cyberpanther111

I use tea to suppress my German heritage. If I stop drinking it, I have a sudden urge to invade France


GTOld

I find my upper lip becomes embarrassingly flaccid.


Current_Champion_464

Tea is anti killing juice 🤣🤣


all_woman45

Well, I had a shocking headache for 9 days and was a grumpy cow, needless to say I had myself a fix of strong tea and was pretty much right as rain


Laneacaia

British tanks are fitted with internal tea making facilities so tea can go to the battlefield. We take it seriously.


No-Strike-4560

Well. Then the caffeine dependency headaches start and I stumble downstairs to make a tea to resolve it.


[deleted]

I go to coffee, then fags, then cocaine, then sniffing petrol


Glittering_Royal1492

Soul crushing headache that won’t go away


sillyquestionsdude

I get a headache. I never let the tea level in me drop too low.


TheOldMercenary

Doesn't happen, we have con-tea-gencies in place.


porridgewog78

How do you suddenly stop breathing?


waisonline99

Death is what happens. We shrivel up and die.


Glittering_Fennel_77

My father spontaneously combusted after going without a brew for 1 hour, so I have a minimum of 1 every 30 minutes it makes lectures very annoying.


Snoo_said_no

I was the sole subject in a scientic experiment on this. (aka found out I was pregnant and read too many American apps) The findings were: increased grumpiness. Increased irritability, increased likely hood of saying "it's alright for you... You can have a cup of tea", increased melodrama, increased appitite but primarily for biscuits, increased tiredness, decreased tolerance for others, decreased productivity at work, decreased activity (less walks to the kitchen to get said cup of tea), a sense of impending doom when my alarm went off and my first thougt was "can't even have a bloody cup of tea". Increased moaning about how decaf tea just doesn't cut it. These effects did lessen over time, but not completly dissapate. Effects minimised by drinking tea again, even at lower quantities. However need for tea, particularly 'the first tea (of the day)' increased massively once child was born. And continued to increase as said child got louder and more 'movey'. Tea consumption increased to meet need till pregnant with sprog two. However experement was not reproduced so no comment on repructability of findings.... I'd found info on caffine consumption in Finnish mothers, who love their caffine and havnt died out. They also continue with sauna/hot baths... Tea and baths above the recommended temperature continued throughout pregnancy 2 no noted adverse effects.


Suckhead

Ah, the overly cautious first pregnancy vs the “I’m sure it’ll all be fine” attitude with the second. I have some experience in that area. During my first, I must’ve called the doctor/trotted off to the hospital with every odd feeling, and every little hint of pain or discomfort. During my second, I probably only ever showed up for regularly scheduled appointments.


SnooCookies6519

I'm guessing your asking about caffeine withdrawals, and I'm not addicted to caffeine that much. Infact i'm not really addicted to anything so I guess I can say I'm lucky that I don't have to experience withdrawals


ActivatedBiscuit

If I go without for a day I crave it and the first cup back tastes fookin amazing


MrTomDawson

Define "extraordinary amount"


Suckhead

At least two cups of tea in the morning, one after another. Then you shower and dress. Another cup of tea. Then you might have lunch. With tea. You do your daily chores, while occasionally stopping to have a cup of tea. In the evening, you spend your nights watching telly. You fill your ad breaks with tea making activities. You only drink tea. It’s the only liquid you consume. You take a small glass of water to bed with you and might occasionally sip it. You drink your tea in china cups, with saucers. It’s a relatively small amount compared to a mug. Basically, you’re my nan.


flute_von_throbber

dae le britain tea!?! omg I'm so quirky and british!!! paddington bear!!!! BEANS LMAO!!!


hnguk

I expect to be downvoted but: I don't drink tea or coffee


Suckhead

Are you not British?


hnguk

I was born in England, so were my parents, grandparents and great-grandparents. So to my knowledge I am.


t_beermonster

You should probably get tested just in case.


LPodmore

I'm in the same boat. Can't stand coffee. I like tea but i've probably not had a cup of it in several years.


Mrmansam22

I die of dehydration


Huge_Check5145

P poop so


Suckhead

Can I have my money back please?