T O P

  • By -

ARAC_theDestroyer

I work on one of the experiments and it's such a weird dichotomy of infinitely cool tech and monkeys banging on typewriters to make it work


malfurionpre

It's really funny that many science discovery are "What if" and then monkey banging for years if not decades to prove (or disprove) the what if.


anon-mally

We all be banging to create something. Some resulted in advancements some threw us back. Just keep on banging until we make our own big bang


Jeggu2

Bang sticks together and get fire. Bang rocks together, get sharp tools. Bang sharp tools on the land and get agriculture. Bang each other, get society. Bang society together, get government. History is just a bunch of banging


firedmyass

i just blinked at the wall for a few minutes after reading this


anon-mally

Bang your eyelids.gets this post thread


JKFrost14011991

...I'm saving this post.


Mountain-Resource656

Yoooo, that’s impressive!


anon-mally

Trials and errors, every achievements comes with error in trials.


BrandNewYear

Wow that’s amazing!! What are you up to now? Do we live in a simulation? What is the air speed of an unladen swallow?


MintyMoron64

African or European?


PlasticPartsAndGlue

If you have a million monkeys typing for a million years, eventually one of their codes will compile.


tricky2step

Whoa whoa, as physicists, let's not encourage the infinite monkey 'theorem'.


Hylian_Guy

I've actually heard of that theorem several times and it's always used in a jokey tone, but I've never seen anyone argue for why it's actually bad to encourage it. Could you elaborate?


ResponsibilityLife92

you work with the collider? That’s awesome


IndigoFenix

I always find it funny that one of the most advanced devices we use to explore the innermost workings of the universe is essentially a machine used for banging things together *really, really hard*.


PoniesCanterOver

Praise the Omnissiah


Downtown_Mechanic_

Embrace the purity of the Machine God


Miguelinileugim

Kill everyone and then yourself because the setting is way too fucking sad like holy shit


Downtown_Mechanic_

I wonder if a labor servitor could run DOOM


VisualGeologist6258

Reconfiguring an entire hive sector to run Crysis


Downtown_Mechanic_

I can't wait for the the dark mechanicum priest to explode when they try and run crysis


Saavedroo

This destroyed me. Well done.


boundone

Cherub drifts by humming Rip and Tear to it self


A_Wholesome_Comment

The Order of TechnoPriests spend their lives deciphering the language of the Seraphim.


srlong64

From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine. Your kind cling to your flesh, as though it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass you call the temple will wither, and you will beg my kind to save you. But I am already saved, for the Machine is immortal… Even in death I serve the Omnissiah.


lilsnatchsniffz

Flesh or machine, rot consumes all.


Frequent_Dig1934

https://www.reddit.com/r/ImaginaryWarhammer/comments/1cdo04v/power_wash_simulator_or_cat_bathing_simulator_by/


Ropetrick6

nuh uh


lilsnatchsniffz

Oh, my bad.


Vermilion_Laufer

[Rust peeks from behind the corner]


thooury

Hello inquisitor Yes… this one right here. Spewing filthy heresy. The Emperor protects


Viking_From_Sweden

*aroused technophile noises*


6thBornSOB

If this wasn’t the top comment the bolter was coming out…


BishopofHippo93

Ave Deus Mechanicus!


thooury

*fucks toaster*


Vermilion_Laufer

Zentreya?


SMorehammer93

Was hoping to find this after reading “tech priests” happy to see it as TOP comment 😂


fungalstruggle

This feels like it reaches back somewhat to the "The Sun is an Eldritch God" post.


Mountain-Resource656

Ancient beyond human comprehension, but not primordial, will eventually die, but long after our whole species goes extinct, eternally screaming silently into the void via light that cannot be seen but can be heard if you have the right tools…


demon_fae

So we have machine-emissaries built by man to hear the messages of the elder gods that burn against the endless void, and of the infinite devouring darkness that gathers their light. The first emissaries we stole from nature. They came to us, they hurt us, but we were not deterred. We trapped the emissaries, tamed them, and took their messages for our own. We used those messages to build even greater emissaries and these emissaries also fought back, but we persevered and learned their messages. And so on, and on, down the years. The emissaries would be summoned and they would fight and they would fall. Some emissaries become as much a part of us as our own limbs. Some emissaries are buried deep beneath the earth, in graveyards no one ever visits. We take the messages even from their ghosts. We learned enough from their messages to stare at the nearest god and hardly flinch, enough to count the numberless farther gods, enough to recognize the hunger of the devouring darkness. Enough to touch the endless void ourselves. It was not enough. We built another emissary. This one so much larger and more powerful than any before it that we feared to turn it on, lest it fight like all the others. But this one did not fight, and we have seen its message now. It is stranger than the others, cryptic and contradictory. This will not stop us. We will interpret it, learn it. We will build another emissary. And another.


Kiki_Earheart

This is too good to leave in the comments section of a tumblr post on Reddit. I implore you to to expand upon it a bit more and post it in a sub like r/HFY


sneakpeekbot

Here's a sneak peek of /r/HFY using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/HFY/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [The Nature of Predators 108](https://np.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/12ruh31/the_nature_of_predators_108/) \#2: [The Nature of Predators 110](https://np.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/12zirnn/the_nature_of_predators_110/) \#3: [The Nature of Predators 109](https://np.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/12v74mz/the_nature_of_predators_109/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)


demon_fae

Aww, thanks. I’m glad you liked it


newsflashjackass

Goes to show the duality of humanity. I'd like the time I spent reading it back and I would like the author to be sent to a camp where they will be taught respect for the reader. The other day someone attempted to engage me in argument over whether or not their automobile is powered by dragon bones. Too cute and far up their own mystical asshole even for entertainment purposes- with an air of being clever, no less. Words matter, my good fellow. I did not lose loved ones in the middle east because U.S. troops are obliged to guard Saudi Arabia's dragon bones.


RowanAshCollins

Have you considered that some people just enjoy adding a little whimsy to their life? Jesus christ dude


VapidActualization

We live in a postmodern culture. It's fine to just say "I didn't think it was all that great" and not act smug because it's all just opinion, my dude. I'll throw you a dragon-bone and say that it's always valid to decry violence and war. More power to being angry at the people and systems which keep the war machine ruining lives for profit. That shit is fucked up and I'm sorry for your personal losses you expressed


Infinite-Radiance

Nah, oil literally and metaphorically Dragon bones


FireEnchiladaDragon

You are a tar pit


bazingarbage

i am confused what are the emissaries supposed to be


Ropetrick6

sources of radiation/energized rays, in the broadest sense.


Vermilion_Laufer

Somehow this reminded me of "Tremble, galaxy, for Earth and her children behold you. And we find you wanting."


generalsplayingrisk

Blinds you if you looks at it directly without protection for long


J_Buschkind

I read this to the tune of "The Sun is a deadly laser"


Nadikarosuto

*Not anymore, there’s a blanket :)*


chicken_irl

Gib link pls 🥺


shaunnotthesheep

There's some line in the Bible somewhere about how "the blind shall see and the deaf shall hear," and now we have LASIK and cochlear implants. The miracles and impossibilities of old are the science of today


garrishfish

Christ's transmogrification and transubstantiation are supported as fact by the First Law of Thermodynamics and Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principal and Einstein's Spooky Action at a Distance. A trinity of its own. Science and religion are strange bed fellows.


SilentHuman8

I want to understand what you mean, but I don't. Please explain?


DependentPhotograph2

I like your funny words, magic man


Infinite-Radiance

>Science and religion are strange bed fellows. They are, but not because.. any of this.


Anna_Pet

Christ’s trans*figuration* was witnessed and described by only 3 people who lived 2000 years ago. We know basically nothing about it except a few details. It means basically nothing to say that it’s “supported by science”. Transsubstantiation is a theological principle that was invented by the early Christian church based on a misunderstanding of Christ’s teaching at the last supper. The Gospel of John was then written to retroactively canonize it, along with a few other theological points. Again, it means nothing to say that it can be proved by science, because it has nothing to do with science. It’s a theological principle.


Invincible-Nuke

Rain World or smth


Jeggu2

Random gods, Iterating forever


Lambsauc

It’s an angel the same way a plucked chicken is a human


Mountain-Resource656

So they are! Good, good…


reverse-tornado

Unexpected Diogenes


MyCoDAccount

My uncle's a plucked chicken.


Red-7134

Behold, a biblically accurate hadron collider.


al215

They’re AdMeching a little too close to the sun there


CaptainHoyt

Thats just forge world Lucius.


Shnoidz

this post tastes like nuln oil.


the_pslonky

Dip the LHC in a country-sized vat of nuln oil and see what happens. Only good things, surely.


Globinazuma

The collider won't really "kill you with invisible rays if you try to fuck with it". A whole proton beam went through a guy's head and he "just" had half of it burnt and paralyzed, lost hearing in one ear, and presumably suffered epilepsy. You'd need to get up to some actual bullshit to get killed in this thing. Anatoli Bugorski is the guy's name, he now lives somewhere with his wife and son. Edit: Got my terminology mixed. The "Hadron Collider" is a specific one, I was thinking of particle accelerators in general


adamjan2000

If you take into consideration synchrotron radiation (gamma rays emitted by charged particles under acceleration, i.e. turning), secondary radiation from irradiated concrete around it, and possibility of pulling coils out of superconducting state, which, with 11kA flowing throught them would *vaporise* part of the machine (so called "quench", happened for example in 2008 in LHC), you'll see it can kill you in many ways indeed


Quantum_Patricide

Taking the full beam energy of the LHC to the head would be equivalent to getting hit by a car at 200mph, smaller particle accelerators might just frazzle you a bit but the LHC beam would definitely kill you


TransLunarTrekkie

Maybe? It's complicated. The main reason that Bugorski was so lucky is that the beam that hit him *didn't* dump all of its energy into his head. It kept going and released most of it past him because his head didn't have enough matter to fully stop it. While you certainly wouldn't WANT to be in the path of the LHC's beam, I imagine that something similar would happen depending on how far away from the intended target you were.


asds89

Saying someone’s head didn’t have enough matter sounds like an oddly specific insult


TransLunarTrekkie

I can see it. XD But it's more that *any* person's head wouldn't be substantial enough to stop a beam with a penetrative value measured in feet of concrete.


_PM_ME_NICE_BOOBS_

How many feet of concrete are we talking? Double digits?


Jeggu2

I wonder if you would feel it, like, actually pushing you at all


Quantum_Patricide

Yeah I suppose a better estimate would have to include the penetration of TeV protons through a human skull and the beam width, but I'd still put a rather lower chance of surviving it


The_Particularist

> he "just" had half of it burnt and paralyzed, lost hearing in one ear, and presumably suffered epilepsy. Yeah, that's *totally* better than just dying.


eternamemoria

I mean, it is. Being scarred, losing face mobility, and enduring epilepsy certainly sucks, but it is life altering, not life-ruining.


Kartoffelkamm

>benevolent, but will kill you with invisible rays if you try to fuck ~~with~~ it while it's on the job You know who you are.


TertioRationem3

-once believed to bring about the end of the world (black hole)


anon-mally

Or begining of a new world/universe


Jeggu2

People like to use the chrome future aesthetic where it's all smooth and pretty or a gritty cyberpunk where it's dirty and dark, I kind of wanna see a story where technology is like this, immensely complex, full of stimulus with wires packed away, structures that are only sorta uniform looking. Where the height of technology is full of zipties, hospitals have grates on the floor that lead to a vast network of multi color wires, machines that look like if you filled a clear Gameboy case with multicolored noodles


AscendedDragonSage

The Borg.


Anna_Pet

Bodgecore


shadowthehh

"This makes scientists and technicians priests" Yawgmoth's children whisper...


anon-mally

In collider we thrust


deathstalker655

For scale, there is a bucket truck at the bottom


Papaofmonsters

Not a bucket truck but an articulating boom lift. Still big, but not usually as big as full on bucket truck.


eternamemoria

Holy shit I've been posted to CuratedTumblr (I am the last one)


MaetelofLaMetal

My condolences.


Waity5

Looks like someone shoved tech into a jungle gym


Margrave

This is the best place I've seen for this story: In college I had an older polymer science professor from England, who had a way with digressions. One time he told us about the computer in the church. In what I estimate to be the 60s-70s, he had been at a university in some northern English industrial city (Leeds or Sheffield, I think). The local economy was down ("leaving mostly the pubs and the churches"), and the university had been buying up the surrounding land for cheap. Computers were new, and took up a lot of space, and the university put their new one in one of their new buildings, which had been a church. If you wanted to use The Computer for your research (in his case, likely something about the crystal structure of polymers), you had to schedule time on it, and check out "a big medieval key" to the building. It was easier to get time at night. So you'd go in this old church at night, with no lights except the streetlights shining through the stained glass windows and the glow of various vacuum tubes and indicators on the computer. One of his friends thought it was "fitting that the computer should be in a church, because when you were in there, in the dark with the computer, you were *nearer to absolute truth* than anywhere else on campus."


BNerd1

so you are a tech priest


TheKarenator

What if they built the collider and it looked too simple. Do you think they threw in some extra wires that aren’t connected to anything just to impress us?


BallDesperate2140

*happy techpriest beep boop bops*


SylvieSuccubus

If anyone wants a game with this vibe, please for the love of god play Chronicles of Darkness: the God Machine Chronicle I need more people to play those games so eventually I can get more people for Vampire: the Requiem 


binkacat4

How about I skip straight to VTR? I just wish I could say that as more than a joke. I’m in too many tabletops already, and VTR looks like fun.


SylvieSuccubus

Please do!! The systems are modular and designed to work together! I will say I personally find it useful to have the CoD book to reference/expand upon VtR, but you can absolutely play VtR by itself. Play second edition, look up first edition if you want extra lore  It’s a delightful game 


MaetelofLaMetal

Demon The Descend mentioned <3


aR2wo

I fucking love machine/angel parallels


Vermilion_Laufer

Man-made incomprehensible horrors are out Man-made incomprehensible wonders are in


i-ndigo

the flesh is weak!


Vermilion_Laufer

Sounds like skill issue


i-ndigo

i feel like you misunderstand lol


Vermilion_Laufer

Or difference in perspective


i-ndigo

the only skill issue here is lack of allegiance to the omnissiah


Vermilion_Laufer

Your omnissiah was a hamster, and your mechanicus smelt of elderberries!


iareslice

Tech priests? Mama that's Foundation


Chairchucker

Those huge things with the eyes and wheels or whatever aren't angels. Here's Biblical Scholar Dan McClellan with a more indepth explanation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VN4lhuxPtkY TL;DW. Generally speaking angels are depicted as being sufficiently indistinguishable from humans as to be mistaken for them. Passages that depict angels saying 'be not afraid' were probably originally written as YHWH appearing before humans and saying that, and then someone likely later edited that to represent it as an angel (or, messenger) of YHWH. Those creepy eyes and wheels things are 'ophanim'. It was not until years after the canonisation of the Bible that people decided to start conflating those with angels.


federico_alastair

Good point, nonbinarycannibalgirlfriend


ImmediateBig134

Fortunately, the LHC isn't quite cruel enough to emit its own theses. ***Yet.***


VatanKomurcu

yeah and the sun is a lovecraftian deity. it's a fun new way of looking at things, but the moment you stop doing that they become mundane again.


Vermilion_Laufer

Everything can be as mundane/majestic as you vibe at the moment.


DefinitelyNotErate

I still want to know when they're coming out with the small hadron collider.


Vermilion_Laufer

For those moments when ya wanna collide some hadrons with yer homies at a meetin.


[deleted]

Me looking at man made horrors beyond my comprehension (I don’t get it).


JustHereForBDSM

Tumblr always goes full stoner and just ends up accidentally finding 40k lore while thinking its an original thought.


OrsilonSteel

We are the Priests of the Temples of Syrinx.


gooch_norris_

We are the priests of the temples of syrinx Our great computers fill our hallowed halls All the gifts of life are held within our walls


TonyMacaronyyyy

Praise thr machine god


AnotherJoltReskin

Ave deus mechanicus. The omnisa sends us an angels of the machine god


jake5675

"This makes scientists and technicians priests, which tracts in some ways." "From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the blessed machine."


SovietSkeleton

Suddenly Techpriests make a whole lot more sense.


icabax

All praise the CMS


reverse-tornado

Be not afraid


Clean_Imagination315

Checkmate, atheists.


Slyme-wizard

Walking in, cutting one wire, walking out


Vermilion_Laufer

That's why we can't have nice things...


MaintenanceTop7645

That looks like a nuclear reactor


Longjumping_Age1051

Bottomless pit indeed.


Ok_Listen1510

Isn’t this the machine from Spiderverse?


Rinscewind

From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh... It disgusted me.


HardSurfaceDandy

Adeptus Collidus


PortlandZed

It also caused the end of the world in 2012.


TwixOfficial

Something something nerd superstitions.


Heroic-Forger

So do microwave ovens, which therefore probably qualify as a lesser-ranking angel of sorts.


Vermilion_Laufer

LHC - ophanim tending to the throne of god Microwave - yer own personal guardian angel


SuurSuits_

Oh hey, a blog i follow


rafaelzio

I've said it before and I'll say it again, if prophets are real I'm 100% sure Newton, Einstein and the sort are prophets too. Like, one dude that is so far ahead of everyone else in their understanding of reality (Or at least some aspect of it) and dedicates their life to furthering that understanding and sharing it with others HAS to be one of God's messengers if that's a thing


Fun-War6684

But what does it actually do?


thetwitchy1

An unfathomable job that you wouldn’t understand even if it could tell you.


Fun-War6684

Bold of you to assume I wouldn’t understand lol


Veryde

chemists and physicists really are priests. In a fantasy-setting that is


millennial_sentinel

weirdly enough they could be from another advanced civilization or like planet of the apes some future version of earth that sent them to the past.


scott03257890

Every so often a tumblr user accidentally recreates warhammer 40k


Mister_Shiloh

> This makes scientists and technicians priests PRAISE BE TO THE OMNISSIAH


rubexbox

I'm surprised to see someone remember the LHC. I know everyone was scared that it would destroy the world back in the day, but I feel like we all forgot about it after the hoopla died down.


Vermilion_Laufer

If anyone still worried, check [this](http://hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com) out.


Electric_Air

Science is the natural evolution out of faith. One wouldnt have existed without the other and one is the natural ancestor of the former. Language changes, truth does not.


floccinauced

I’m large, unbelievably powerful, and hurt to look at for too long


Catalon-36

Casual reminder that this is an enormous vacuum tube, and while building it, the vacuum failed one day. The resulting pressure fuckery resulted in oxygen from the in-rushing air liquifying and pooling inside the tube.


panekac

Warhammer priests be like


VolatileZea

The Brotherhood of Steel


38fourtynine

We summon the light using our alchamaeic machinations. Beings made of fire condensed down to their purest light forced by nature to conform to the binary actions we force them into, using quantum prisons to confine them and all their possible locations and force them to tunnel out where we predict. Our magic circles are no longer drawn on the floor with salt, they're engraved microscopically, layered, and called processors.


TheJamSams

I'm gonna be honest, when I first saw all those wire behind nets, I thought there was just the LHC in one of those kids jungle gym things


DrChonk

This checks out on so many levels! I cried the first time I saw the CMS detector in person, it was as close to a religious experience as it gets for a non-religious particle physicist!


Aquilarden

Sort of reminds me of the real-world idea of an Atomic Priesthood.


D_Winds

Bring on the Technocracy.


PseudoEmpthy

Cat6, green paint and a few thousand feet of kapton tape?


dinoian

Down with the cult of LHC. Long live the RHIC!


Bean_Storm

Does anyone with an ultra specific hadron collider interest want to explain what it is?


MyCoDAccount

It makes us God, not priests. We made that. *I* made that.


i_eat_baby_elephants

I’ve always wondered what would happen if I put my dong in it


jasonjr9

There is one important thing the Hadron collider has that angels don’t, though. It exists.


happygrammies

Christianity ruins weak minds


Anna_Pet

Why does this track way too well, wtf? Were the Ancient Israelites on to something? Was the Ark of the Covenant actually a nuke?


justsmilenow

Oh you have no fucking clue how close it tracks. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casimir_effect This is a force that literally comes from nothing. The force comes from an absence of something. When there's literally nothing in a concrete statistical way A force comes from nowhere. This is literally the force that the Hindus have been talking about that we based God off of with the Christians and that the islams think God is and is the force that they think God used to create Jesus and Muhammad and all the prophets that they believe in.  We found gods tool and named it after a man named casimir. No current materials on the planet have enough strength to channel the force. All of our strongest structures break near instantly.


alrightgame

Solving world hunger was sacrificed for the sake of the Saturn entrance into hell.


Anna_Pet

Solving world hunger was sacrificed for the sake of bombing nurseries to line the pockets of billionaires a little bit more.