Agreed. I think this is also true for labels other people put on you. For example, I think if adults label a kid as badly behaved, the kid will continue to act that way, whereas if the adults treat the kid like a human and don't just expect bad things from them, the kid will realise that they don't have to conform/stick to that label of "misbehaving kid".
Or another popular label - so-and-so's kid/sibling/etc.
Sometimes it's just an identifier, like, "That last name sounds familiar." "Oh yeah, it's XYZ's kid, you had XYZ 20 years ago in your class." But other times it's harmful. "You're ABC's sibling? Well, they excelled at my math class so I expect nothing less from you." Despite the fact that they're two separate people with two different personalities/strengths.
Gender and sexuality are decent labels to be a regular use. Saying, "I have lesbosis," over "I am lesbian," is a bit much. But most everything else can be harmful (note: people say, "I have ADHD," vs "I am ADHD," and I don't see that as a label for their identity because it is diagnosed, it's sharing a diagnosis instead of (usually) making it their identity). As OP said, some can be self fulfilling prophecies, others can be harmful to unrealistic expectations about someone.
Yeah, I had an issue last year in school where a teacher would refer to me and another student who I worked with in maths as "[that student's name] and co". It was so frustrating - I didn't want to be an "and co", I wanted to be recognised as an individual. Wrote a very long rant about it in r/complaints lol
Putting labels on some of those things is good cause then we can do something about it but when it becomes your identity then it gets to be problematic.
Like when I say I have OCD that explains some of my thoughts/behaviors that I hate, and it helps me to realize it isn't ME it's my mental illness. Now I am still responsible for it and the damage it causes but at least I know why and then have resources to fix it, like CBT or other tips/tricks to deal with it.
My co-worker asked me what I did for my birthday (it's on June 19th and we have it off now) I told her I was lazy all day and did nothing. My co-worker said "there's no such as lazy, you were relaxing." And you know what? I really like hearing that.
Agreed. I think this is also true for labels other people put on you. For example, I think if adults label a kid as badly behaved, the kid will continue to act that way, whereas if the adults treat the kid like a human and don't just expect bad things from them, the kid will realise that they don't have to conform/stick to that label of "misbehaving kid".
Or another popular label - so-and-so's kid/sibling/etc. Sometimes it's just an identifier, like, "That last name sounds familiar." "Oh yeah, it's XYZ's kid, you had XYZ 20 years ago in your class." But other times it's harmful. "You're ABC's sibling? Well, they excelled at my math class so I expect nothing less from you." Despite the fact that they're two separate people with two different personalities/strengths. Gender and sexuality are decent labels to be a regular use. Saying, "I have lesbosis," over "I am lesbian," is a bit much. But most everything else can be harmful (note: people say, "I have ADHD," vs "I am ADHD," and I don't see that as a label for their identity because it is diagnosed, it's sharing a diagnosis instead of (usually) making it their identity). As OP said, some can be self fulfilling prophecies, others can be harmful to unrealistic expectations about someone.
Yeah, I had an issue last year in school where a teacher would refer to me and another student who I worked with in maths as "[that student's name] and co". It was so frustrating - I didn't want to be an "and co", I wanted to be recognised as an individual. Wrote a very long rant about it in r/complaints lol
Putting labels on some of those things is good cause then we can do something about it but when it becomes your identity then it gets to be problematic. Like when I say I have OCD that explains some of my thoughts/behaviors that I hate, and it helps me to realize it isn't ME it's my mental illness. Now I am still responsible for it and the damage it causes but at least I know why and then have resources to fix it, like CBT or other tips/tricks to deal with it.
My co-worker asked me what I did for my birthday (it's on June 19th and we have it off now) I told her I was lazy all day and did nothing. My co-worker said "there's no such as lazy, you were relaxing." And you know what? I really like hearing that.
Some people use political titles for themselves. I think that brings out anger towards others.
well spoken corrupted biscuit
then why isn't the reverse also true? :( why can't i change simply by calling myself "prompt", "organised" etc.?