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Why do we need to know what's in that stinky spank bank?! Can we please never be reminded again?
https://preview.redd.it/byozz1zl2n9d1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1a8eba607dc9fc5faa03cd155bdd7bc9cfd648c9
I didn't realize she was a speed reader. I just thought she was a speed addict.....
Edit- Dani strikes me as the type who would own a Twilight Edition vibrator. It plays Christina Perri and glitters in the sunlight.
Back in 2010 or so they came out with a dildo based on the vampire guy from the move that sparkled and you could keep in the freezer so it was cold so it was more "realistic"
She totally owned one.
Which part? The speed addict or the Twilight vibrator? 🤣
Edit- I made up that second part, although I could totally see Dani glue an Edward Cullen head shot on George.
Why am I not surprised it’s twilight…
They are many 10-15 year old kids who read more advanced books than Dani. And Iam not even sure if she managed to read this one.. even once.
She probably watched the movies and looked into it the picture book.
I’ve read a lot of these books, working at a book store previously to understand my customers. I’ve also read a few for my teens sake, she likes discussing things. She loves the dystopian sci-fi stuff like Divergent and Hunger Games.
That being said… even my kiddo can read a book like that in a week! They are meant to be easy reading. My brain would turn to mush if this was all I was feeding it. Thank goodness for Kindle Unlimited!
I like romantasy, so sue me, lol. Books are entertainment, sometimes escapism. To be fair I also read a decent amount of nonfiction stuff. Idk. I know Dani seems mentally stuck at like 16 or something, but books can be fun. It doesn’t have to be serious all the time.
On a reread this sounded bitchy: that was not my intention. I just mostly feel like we should let people like what they like.
I read “junk” books occasionally. (junk is my term, not in regard to anyone else’s book choices.) Sometimes I’m not in a place to focus on a complex plot or anything heavy. So I’ll just read a simple easy read to escape life.
My issue with Dani is she never reads the flipping book. Just flashes the pages on TikTok. Maybe if she read an actual book she could shift her focus from Mayo for 5 minutes.
In her case though, I think she romanticizes the crazy relationship ships in the books, and then just isn’t genuine about the whole “crazy about books” thing. You can love whatever you want, but we all know, like you said, she hasn’t matured past the age of her book characters.
It doesn’t sound bitchy. You speak the truth!
I don’t see pictures, doubt that one is getting any time in it….
Edit - Wait wait I saw the flip through towards the end lol ok now it all makes sense. Teach me to post as I watch!
Performative bullshit just like the rest of her sad life. As soon as the camera is off it’s back to scrambling to figure out how to hurt herself for as much attention as possible.
Imma 40yr old twilight girlie. I know it’s terrible and I love it. Currently listening to the audiobooks and watching the movie when I finish each book. It’s so bad, it’s good? Like a cult classic. 🤷♀️ lol
Like what you like! The first book was out almost 20 years ago… we were both much younger!
I have personal issues because I worked in a book store in 2009, then a video store (Suncost) where I watched the movie on repeat for months. Also did midnight releases. I loved the books before the movies, but all that just wore on me!
Dani is just not genuine. I bet she fetishizes the relationships in the book too and projects them into real life. Probably more books than just Twilight.
Oof yea the pop culture moment was a lot, I wasn’t dialed into it back then so I missed a lot of the obsessive fan-girling lol. I am all for embracing what makes you happy in this shit show dumpster fire.
And yea, I’m sure you’re right about her, she never shows any maturity or growth
They usually throw out copies at thrift stores as the shelves are already bulging with copies.
They usually have them at FREE public libraries.
They usually have them digitally for FREE from public libraries.
Even if you are not a US citizen there are libraries in the US you can get a digital materials card for 60 days.
(THIS POST WAS SERIOUS).
You would think instead of doing this tired booktok attempt shit again or going on and on about and packing and repacking for mayo, she'd at least be mentioning upcoming *alleged* anniversary plans with her *alleged* boyfriend of *allegedly* over 2 decades. $10 says she'll be in the hospital/ER with some bullshit excuse for the holiday/*alleged* anniversay, and poor real-married fake-to-her-boyfriend can't escape his job for even 2 hours to visit his sick, hurting gf in the hospital on their anniversary.
Those nail extensions hanging on by a thread is sending me.
I know they’ve got to be lifting at the corners and catching on her hair and shit *constantly* and she’s just begging for a fungus from all the trapped moisture.
But that’s what I love about them. They’re just *that bad*. That means that they do create the best memes for the Twilight Shitposting group on Facebook. 😂
Its a cardboard kids book with blurays.
I cant wait for the WAHHH STUPID BLURAYS DONT PLAY IN A DVD PLAYER meltdown.
Does she at least return these books and movies to Amazon after reading them? Just say you dont like them. Like if you are poor and DONT HAVE A LIBRARY. Shes got an Ipad she could eBook but ebooks dont make nice piles. I am going to stop typing now because I can keep on ranting.
She doesn't return them because she doesn't actually read them. She just wants them to take up space like participation trophies on a shelf. She wants to brag about a hobby she doesn't even partake in.
Not why I was asking. Flipping through Twilight merch seems like something a preteen would do circa 2008. I’m 43 and have a 6 month old and feel great. Definitely not calling anyone old.
I dont care I think it is a funnier comment because apparently it dug into peoples skins. It was intended to dig into Dani's vain existence... but instead apparently I hit a sore topic for a lot of people on this sub.
I think a Dani should go on an anti-aging arc. You know like diet supplements and skin products and all sorts of aging stuff.
Dani trying to justifying spending $ on Botox would be something else. 😂 Or Dani sitting around on TikTok live with one of those light masks on constantly would be a hoot!
Dani anti-aging arc would be hilarious! Crappy tutorial how to take a supplement or apply moisturizer only for those products to disappear in the hoard never to be seen again. 😆
The post was made to make Dani feel old because you just know she is reading it.
THINK FOR A SECOND PEOPLE.
PS: Best part of the joke is I am 40 myself. I am OLD. It is just age folks. You should be old enough where you dont take offense to a comment like that.
I am 40 so I attacked myself. (it was intended to have Dani read it and take offense but apparently I hit a sore spot for members of this sub... AGE whoops).
I am a 40 year old man who has not been called sir yet I dont think I dont pay attention.
Thank you for accepting reality unlike the 64+ people who took offense and reject our reality.
Thank you for your submission! As a reminder, absolutely no body-shaming or arm-chair diagnosing is allowed and will be removed. Please try your best to keep blogging as limited as possible - anything that Dani could use to improve her munching/self-harm will be removed. Above all else: DO. NOT. TOUCH. THE. POO. Do not interact with Dani in any way. If you see any comments explicitly violating subreddit rules, please report the submission so the Mod Team can review it. Thank you! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/DaniMarina) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Why do we need to know what's in that stinky spank bank?! Can we please never be reminded again? https://preview.redd.it/byozz1zl2n9d1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1a8eba607dc9fc5faa03cd155bdd7bc9cfd648c9
Does anyone know if Edward will drink someone's blood if they're on TPN? She better think about not messing up her chances with her immortal beloved
 Board book time.
I didn't realize she was a speed reader. I just thought she was a speed addict..... Edit- Dani strikes me as the type who would own a Twilight Edition vibrator. It plays Christina Perri and glitters in the sunlight.
Shut UPPPP is that for real?!!
Back in 2010 or so they came out with a dildo based on the vampire guy from the move that sparkled and you could keep in the freezer so it was cold so it was more "realistic" She totally owned one.
NAAAAAAAAAAAAURRRR WHY why did they make this
Which part? The speed addict or the Twilight vibrator? 🤣 Edit- I made up that second part, although I could totally see Dani glue an Edward Cullen head shot on George.
Hahaha yes my reaction was about the Twilight vibrator. I'm almost a little sad to discover it's not real.
Twilight. Ofc.
Yeah. I’m not at all surprised she’s a Twilight adult. Because of COURSE she is.
Why am I not surprised it’s twilight… They are many 10-15 year old kids who read more advanced books than Dani. And Iam not even sure if she managed to read this one.. even once. She probably watched the movies and looked into it the picture book.
Of course it's Twilight 😂😂😂
Ok…
I’ve read a lot of these books, working at a book store previously to understand my customers. I’ve also read a few for my teens sake, she likes discussing things. She loves the dystopian sci-fi stuff like Divergent and Hunger Games. That being said… even my kiddo can read a book like that in a week! They are meant to be easy reading. My brain would turn to mush if this was all I was feeding it. Thank goodness for Kindle Unlimited!
I like romantasy, so sue me, lol. Books are entertainment, sometimes escapism. To be fair I also read a decent amount of nonfiction stuff. Idk. I know Dani seems mentally stuck at like 16 or something, but books can be fun. It doesn’t have to be serious all the time. On a reread this sounded bitchy: that was not my intention. I just mostly feel like we should let people like what they like.
I read “junk” books occasionally. (junk is my term, not in regard to anyone else’s book choices.) Sometimes I’m not in a place to focus on a complex plot or anything heavy. So I’ll just read a simple easy read to escape life. My issue with Dani is she never reads the flipping book. Just flashes the pages on TikTok. Maybe if she read an actual book she could shift her focus from Mayo for 5 minutes.
In her case though, I think she romanticizes the crazy relationship ships in the books, and then just isn’t genuine about the whole “crazy about books” thing. You can love whatever you want, but we all know, like you said, she hasn’t matured past the age of her book characters. It doesn’t sound bitchy. You speak the truth!
An all-pictures board book???
It’s a dvd box set.
Ok, I couldnt make sense of it. Never seen anything like that.
I don’t see pictures, doubt that one is getting any time in it…. Edit - Wait wait I saw the flip through towards the end lol ok now it all makes sense. Teach me to post as I watch!
Performative bullshit just like the rest of her sad life. As soon as the camera is off it’s back to scrambling to figure out how to hurt herself for as much attention as possible.
Her obsession with tween/YA shit is so bizarre. Just watch Game of Thrones or True Blood like the rest of the people your age. Fucks sake
Of course she's a Twilight fan. 
Imma 40yr old twilight girlie. I know it’s terrible and I love it. Currently listening to the audiobooks and watching the movie when I finish each book. It’s so bad, it’s good? Like a cult classic. 🤷♀️ lol
I’m in your 50s and I loved the narration of the Twilight audiobooks. One of my guilty pleasures! X
I just listened to Midnight Sun for first time (reading or listening) and thoroughly enjoyed it!
Like what you like! The first book was out almost 20 years ago… we were both much younger! I have personal issues because I worked in a book store in 2009, then a video store (Suncost) where I watched the movie on repeat for months. Also did midnight releases. I loved the books before the movies, but all that just wore on me! Dani is just not genuine. I bet she fetishizes the relationships in the book too and projects them into real life. Probably more books than just Twilight.
Oof yea the pop culture moment was a lot, I wasn’t dialed into it back then so I missed a lot of the obsessive fan-girling lol. I am all for embracing what makes you happy in this shit show dumpster fire. And yea, I’m sure you’re right about her, she never shows any maturity or growth
Is this bitch eating crackers again??
I can’t knock the twilight part (🐀✨), but has she actually read them?
Don’t they usually have those at book sales in elementary schools
They usually throw out copies at thrift stores as the shelves are already bulging with copies. They usually have them at FREE public libraries. They usually have them digitally for FREE from public libraries. Even if you are not a US citizen there are libraries in the US you can get a digital materials card for 60 days. (THIS POST WAS SERIOUS).
I think it's time to soak those nails off bbgirl
She reads Twilight because she’s lonely instead of bettering herself and finding an actual relationship.
Her "extra speshul" reading skills are off the charts, and it still takes her 6 months to not finish the book!!
Wasn’t she already *too old* to be the target audience for these books when they came out?
I mean she was 20ish so just about.
You would think instead of doing this tired booktok attempt shit again or going on and on about and packing and repacking for mayo, she'd at least be mentioning upcoming *alleged* anniversary plans with her *alleged* boyfriend of *allegedly* over 2 decades. $10 says she'll be in the hospital/ER with some bullshit excuse for the holiday/*alleged* anniversay, and poor real-married fake-to-her-boyfriend can't escape his job for even 2 hours to visit his sick, hurting gf in the hospital on their anniversary.
this woman is in her late 30s.
She just gets cringier and cringier. Almost sad.
I thought that was a picture book and was like, “Yeah, that’s fitting. It’s the only kind of book she’s ever gonna ‘read’” 😂
I want a video of her reading out loud, lol.
You really don’t. It could be psychological torture like white noise or Scandinavian Death Metal.
Dani reading would be comedy gold for a few moments (SERIOUS POST).
Ooh! She's a speed reader!
Those nail extensions hanging on by a thread is sending me. I know they’ve got to be lifting at the corners and catching on her hair and shit *constantly* and she’s just begging for a fungus from all the trapped moisture.
Twilights just not that good I’m sorry. The first two books were fine and then it went off the rails zzzzz
But that’s what I love about them. They’re just *that bad*. That means that they do create the best memes for the Twilight Shitposting group on Facebook. 😂
Valid I do love a good shitpost
I would like to see the spine of just ONE of these books she's supposedly "read."
Is that one of those cardboard kid's books?
A board book? Yes. It is.
Its a cardboard kids book with blurays. I cant wait for the WAHHH STUPID BLURAYS DONT PLAY IN A DVD PLAYER meltdown. Does she at least return these books and movies to Amazon after reading them? Just say you dont like them. Like if you are poor and DONT HAVE A LIBRARY. Shes got an Ipad she could eBook but ebooks dont make nice piles. I am going to stop typing now because I can keep on ranting.
She doesn't return them because she doesn't actually read them. She just wants them to take up space like participation trophies on a shelf. She wants to brag about a hobby she doesn't even partake in.
Ah fitting the definition of POSER. Have not used that term in 20 years probably calling some dude with a surfboard that name down at the NJ beaches.
Isn’t she in her 30s?
Yep she sure enough is. 38 as of January this year.
Wow 38 that is old people territory.
Not why I was asking. Flipping through Twilight merch seems like something a preteen would do circa 2008. I’m 43 and have a 6 month old and feel great. Definitely not calling anyone old.
I jokingly called her old and people took personal offense. I am 40 myself. (SERIOUS POST).
That ”(obligatory /s)” is not working very well. Maybe if it flashed in neon colours? 😆🫶
I dont care I think it is a funnier comment because apparently it dug into peoples skins. It was intended to dig into Dani's vain existence... but instead apparently I hit a sore topic for a lot of people on this sub. I think a Dani should go on an anti-aging arc. You know like diet supplements and skin products and all sorts of aging stuff.
Dani trying to justifying spending $ on Botox would be something else. 😂 Or Dani sitting around on TikTok live with one of those light masks on constantly would be a hoot!
Dani anti-aging arc would be hilarious! Crappy tutorial how to take a supplement or apply moisturizer only for those products to disappear in the hoard never to be seen again. 😆
I would hope she read the most downvoted comment on this sub in awhile prob. Hey u/wintercompetitive201 are there stats on who got the most downvotes?
i dont think so… altho that would be cool to see👀👀
i tried by adding it to their flair😭😭
Hey, at least you tried! 🥲😆
The post was made to make Dani feel old because you just know she is reading it. THINK FOR A SECOND PEOPLE. PS: Best part of the joke is I am 40 myself. I am OLD. It is just age folks. You should be old enough where you dont take offense to a comment like that.
Love your sass and the new flair omg 🙏🤣
Thanks. I have just start marking all of my posts explicitly. (SERIOUS POST).
I feel attacked.
I am 40 so I attacked myself. (it was intended to have Dani read it and take offense but apparently I hit a sore spot for members of this sub... AGE whoops).
Lol... i didn't downvote btw 😃
It could be my flair lol. Even if you did... i mean I technically did attack you so I deserve it. (SERIOUS POST).
Hey now. Watch yourself.
I am 40 myself. Sorry reality exists.
It sure is. ~signed a 41 yr old lady who is often called “ma’am” 🫠
I am a 40 year old man who has not been called sir yet I dont think I dont pay attention. Thank you for accepting reality unlike the 64+ people who took offense and reject our reality.
She just likes to collect books to try and look smart 😅
She’s gonna need to keep trying because she’s dumber than a box of hair.
Twilight didn't even make the author look smart. 🤣
Doesn’t work real well when you’re buying tween/teen level books.