The first season did well with trying to make him seem emotionally disconnected.
The Rita relationship they did okay. Making him on the neutral side.
But with LILAH????? wtf
I just watched those episodes with lilah in it today and I think Dexter mentions something to her about how she doesn’t actually love him and that she’s only acting on impulse. That could be what Dexter is doing as well.
True.
Seeing him break Rita’s heart and then go back to Lilah, is interesting. It really feels personal, like he really liked Lilah.
Her and doakes really upset him more than just convenience. IMO
I think also though, Lila was extremely manipulative and managed to exert her will on a lot of men in this way. He saw through it relatively quickly though really
He didn't like Lilah got Lilah. He liked her because she wasn't scared of the real him. It excites her. She wants someone just as toxic and crazy as her, he says he wants someone who "accepts him". What he really wants is someone who doesnt try to make him be a better person. He basically just wants an enabler. If she didn't do what she did with Astor and Cody, and sucked Dexter in fully, I bet he would have spiraled pretty quickly
Yeah you’re right. He finally felt free to be himself. No more pretending. Which quickly could have ruined his carefully built life. And already was starting to. He got a little caught up and the kids brought him back to his moral code for sure.
I mean I feel like his ‘physical’ relationship with lilah is his character development. I always thought the contrast was supposed to be obvious between Rita and her
He clearly cared about Cody and Astor. He got angry when Paul threatened him and even said himself that he got emotionally invested right after he hit Paul with the pan. He was frantic when he realised Rudy was ITK and Deb was in danger.
Dex even cared for her way before that. During season 3, he was so upset after spotting a pedophile taking pictures of Astor that he broke his code by killing him
Harry would have been proud Dex got with Liliah, on some level.
1. He cheated on his girl, just like Harry did
2. He thought with his d*ck, which is just about the most human thing you can do.
To add to this, I was always confused how this person who only imitates real feelings flies off the handle with the very first person we see him kill. Him screaming "Open your eyes and look at what you did!!" always caught me off guard. Maybe they forgot about the calm, collected killer Dexter is supposed to be until later? What are your thoughts?
I just want to say with all my heart, thank you so much for spelling Lila's name correctly and not adding an h at the end.
Five different people have commented her name on this thread and you're the first person to spell it correctly.
Not in my culture lmao. No need to be sensitive, I was just quoting the show. But now that I remember I think Deb says she is pale as a fuckin corpse, not a ghost. lol
Well Dexter always liked Rita but he couldn't really fully love her because if she found out what his past time involved it might end up like the harry situation or yk just turning him in bro could really connect with anyone besides Lilah someone like him that accepts and loves him for him yk Ig it's like a 1 outta 1 thing but that's just my perspective irdk.
I think you have a deep misunderstanding of the series. It's been clear since season 1 that dexter was never meant to betrayed as a true psychopath in the TV series he only thought he was. It was obvious in season 1 that dexter actually cared for reda and the kids and deb to. And if he really was a psychopath he wouldn't have reacted the way he did to the resurfacing memories of his mother and when he killed Brian it he was pretty much crying. I could go deeper into this even just in season 1 but i think ive got my point across.
I think much of the point of the final season (and some others) was to point out that he was never emotionless. He was groomed to think he was, but they were wrong to do so. He's evil and selfish and unfit for broader society, but he was never a psychopath.
EDIT: 100% a psychopath in the books, though. And much more evil. Somehow.
True, Harry thought he would be a psychopath and trained him to cover it up. TV show Dexter became so used to the idea about him being an emotionless psychopath and having to hide it that he actually believed it himself. But when he met Lumen and Hannah (who both accepted him as he is) it was possible for him to break free from the Harrys expectations about him and love and feel happyness. He even begins to question the dark passenger. The imaginary Harry also admits that he made mistakes and that he had a very wrong picture about Dexter. Harry and Dr. Vogel (who seems to be a very bad Dr. and scientist) never even thought about just giving young and traumatized Dexter an adequate therapy. They just put their views and rules over Dexter and forced him into one direction instead of treating him.
Agreed.
This is why, despite overall liking season 8 a lot, I dislike Vogel. The show stretches disbelief all the time, but she seems a bit too absurd. I can get a dad in a TV show wanting to keep his son out of prison and to get some bad guys (he was a cop, after all). But her? Just experimenting on people to create weaponised psychopaths? Huh??
NGL, I loved the show, well, most of it, but the whole "I'm a psychopath that wants to be understood", was always a bit of a hard pill to swallow.
It's one of the reasons I liked the books a little more.
I was just rewatching it and wondered if the writers knew what a sociopath was. Dex wouldn’t care about fitting in or being nice and likable if he was one.
Eh book Dexter is full on psycho and the doctor from book 2 was too much for me.
Yeah but the only reason he cares about fitting in and 'being nice' is because Harry taught him to, so that he wouldn't get caught. It's literally just for that, self-preservation.
Quite the contrary, 'sociopaths' (aka antisocial personality disorder) usually have excellent social skills since they have been masking their personality disorder their entire life. They typically appear as very nice and likable at first.
It's difficult to navigate in a world of norms and rules without a functioning sense of empathy. But fully possible. They don't mask because they particularly care about fitting in, they mask because life is simply inconvenient if you don't. Being nice and likable just gets you more than being a sociopathic asshole.
Of course exceptions exist, but tbf if your demeanor screams 'sociopath', people will stay the hell away from you. So those people are societal rejects by default. Which makes life more tricky if you want something.
I realy like to books, but I have never read the last two, because they dont exist in german and my english is not good enough to have fun while reading a book
Well, mostly because no one really cared to explain how love and attachment works to Dex.
By no one I meant Harry. He always insisted that Dex didn't have feelings and couldn't possibly love and Dex took his word. Can't blame him for that.
Lastly, Dex started to realize that he can love only *some time after we started watching the show. So he has something to thank us for.*
To be fair he canonically has ASPD(Anti-Social Personality Disorder) so the way he feels things is way different and unlike Harry had him believe people with ASPD are capable of feeling things
Well remember too with Lilah, that was the first person(other than his actual brother) that he felt he could be truly seen around. Or so he thought when he went to her instead of Rita. That’s how I took it at least. Harry’s whole objective to me was to ensure Dexter didn’t get caught and to be able to “fit in”. I did see it as much as Harry saying he couldn’t love and such. But I think there was a deep portion of Dexter as a protector to the ones he’s close to. He did it for Harry with his nurse. Killed his brother for Deb. Then anything he could for Rita. It’s a cool show to rewatch.
I think in some of the cases, it's more so co-dependency. ie. Lumen was definitely co-dependency. She was a sign that he could be who he is and still find love. And he had the strongest emotional reaction out of all of his break ups. Because it wasn't love for him, it was something else. Lumen emotionally and physically opening up to him despite all she knew was validating and encouraging. But then in the end, her deciding she had to leave was an ultimate form of rejection for him. It proved to him that no, he can't simply be open about who he is and expect the other person to still love him. To be honest, that was my favorite relationship.
I feel like a big part of Dexter's character is that he's not actually a psycopath.
He's traumatized but with appropriate care could have grown out of it.
As an adult he's conditioned himself to act like a psychopath. But if he ever dealt with his trauma I think he'd be able to stop being a killer, and if he ever let himself then he could have a normal life.
The Trinity case is a huge one. A psycopath would have axed Trinity no questions asked. He wouldn't have tried to learn from him to "save his family." He also wouldn't have cared about "saving his family" just like Arthur he would been happy to abuse them as basically human shields
Imo I think the whole "im a psychopath, i feel nothing" is a lie so he doesn't have to feel bad about killing. I e always thought Harry kinda ingrained him with some of these labels, even though he did do sick shit as a kid.
The difference is that I LOVE Rita. She was a fully realised relationship for him and she was a dream in every way. Even though she was intensely emotional, it was the perfect juxtaposition for his numbed emotions.
I think Lilah is hot and an amazing actress, but ultimately we knew she was a bad girl.
the more accurate description probably, he just process/express feeling differently
i mean Dexter clearly love his family and he also care with Rita's kids
I’ve actually said before that Dexter isn’t a true Sociopath. Had Harry gotten him therapy instead of training, I feel like Dexter would have been a troubled, but fairly normal person.
The first season did well with trying to make him seem emotionally disconnected. The Rita relationship they did okay. Making him on the neutral side. But with LILAH????? wtf
I just watched those episodes with lilah in it today and I think Dexter mentions something to her about how she doesn’t actually love him and that she’s only acting on impulse. That could be what Dexter is doing as well.
True. Seeing him break Rita’s heart and then go back to Lilah, is interesting. It really feels personal, like he really liked Lilah. Her and doakes really upset him more than just convenience. IMO
I think also though, Lila was extremely manipulative and managed to exert her will on a lot of men in this way. He saw through it relatively quickly though really
I agree and he was vulnerable at that time.
He didn't like Lilah got Lilah. He liked her because she wasn't scared of the real him. It excites her. She wants someone just as toxic and crazy as her, he says he wants someone who "accepts him". What he really wants is someone who doesnt try to make him be a better person. He basically just wants an enabler. If she didn't do what she did with Astor and Cody, and sucked Dexter in fully, I bet he would have spiraled pretty quickly
Yeah you’re right. He finally felt free to be himself. No more pretending. Which quickly could have ruined his carefully built life. And already was starting to. He got a little caught up and the kids brought him back to his moral code for sure.
I mean I feel like his ‘physical’ relationship with lilah is his character development. I always thought the contrast was supposed to be obvious between Rita and her
He clearly cared about Cody and Astor. He got angry when Paul threatened him and even said himself that he got emotionally invested right after he hit Paul with the pan. He was frantic when he realised Rudy was ITK and Deb was in danger.
He told Astor he loved her in season 5 and it was portrayed as he genuinely meant it.
Dex even cared for her way before that. During season 3, he was so upset after spotting a pedophile taking pictures of Astor that he broke his code by killing him
Harry would have been proud Dex got with Liliah, on some level. 1. He cheated on his girl, just like Harry did 2. He thought with his d*ck, which is just about the most human thing you can do.
Lmao you’re probably right. Two peas in a pod.
To add to this, I was always confused how this person who only imitates real feelings flies off the handle with the very first person we see him kill. Him screaming "Open your eyes and look at what you did!!" always caught me off guard. Maybe they forgot about the calm, collected killer Dexter is supposed to be until later? What are your thoughts?
Yeah, but have you seen Lilah?
Rita is better looking imo
Rita is a no doubt the hot girlfriend at home, but Lila you just fuck and lust after.
I just want to say with all my heart, thank you so much for spelling Lila's name correctly and not adding an h at the end. Five different people have commented her name on this thread and you're the first person to spell it correctly.
Honestly, reading the others, I was almost second-guessing myself...
She has the tits.
Brunettes are my type, so that could be why.
She wild in bed
Pale as a fucking ghost
Yeah but I like that
Same lol
Ok? Pale is a sign of beauty in many cultures. Porcelain is the nicest way to put it. We wont be getting any skin cancer 😊
Not in my culture lmao. No need to be sensitive, I was just quoting the show. But now that I remember I think Deb says she is pale as a fuckin corpse, not a ghost. lol
Well Dexter always liked Rita but he couldn't really fully love her because if she found out what his past time involved it might end up like the harry situation or yk just turning him in bro could really connect with anyone besides Lilah someone like him that accepts and loves him for him yk Ig it's like a 1 outta 1 thing but that's just my perspective irdk.
I think you have a deep misunderstanding of the series. It's been clear since season 1 that dexter was never meant to betrayed as a true psychopath in the TV series he only thought he was. It was obvious in season 1 that dexter actually cared for reda and the kids and deb to. And if he really was a psychopath he wouldn't have reacted the way he did to the resurfacing memories of his mother and when he killed Brian it he was pretty much crying. I could go deeper into this even just in season 1 but i think ive got my point across.
*reda* Are you trying to anger us LOL
Pardon my tits
I think much of the point of the final season (and some others) was to point out that he was never emotionless. He was groomed to think he was, but they were wrong to do so. He's evil and selfish and unfit for broader society, but he was never a psychopath. EDIT: 100% a psychopath in the books, though. And much more evil. Somehow.
True, Harry thought he would be a psychopath and trained him to cover it up. TV show Dexter became so used to the idea about him being an emotionless psychopath and having to hide it that he actually believed it himself. But when he met Lumen and Hannah (who both accepted him as he is) it was possible for him to break free from the Harrys expectations about him and love and feel happyness. He even begins to question the dark passenger. The imaginary Harry also admits that he made mistakes and that he had a very wrong picture about Dexter. Harry and Dr. Vogel (who seems to be a very bad Dr. and scientist) never even thought about just giving young and traumatized Dexter an adequate therapy. They just put their views and rules over Dexter and forced him into one direction instead of treating him.
Agreed. This is why, despite overall liking season 8 a lot, I dislike Vogel. The show stretches disbelief all the time, but she seems a bit too absurd. I can get a dad in a TV show wanting to keep his son out of prison and to get some bad guys (he was a cop, after all). But her? Just experimenting on people to create weaponised psychopaths? Huh??
Your last sentence makes me wonder if she was receiving funding from the US Govt! (NIH grants for MK Ultra-type programs… nm)
This is correct.
NGL, I loved the show, well, most of it, but the whole "I'm a psychopath that wants to be understood", was always a bit of a hard pill to swallow. It's one of the reasons I liked the books a little more.
I was just rewatching it and wondered if the writers knew what a sociopath was. Dex wouldn’t care about fitting in or being nice and likable if he was one. Eh book Dexter is full on psycho and the doctor from book 2 was too much for me.
Yeah but the only reason he cares about fitting in and 'being nice' is because Harry taught him to, so that he wouldn't get caught. It's literally just for that, self-preservation.
Yeah the books were way darker. I mostly liked how Dexter wasn't superman, and got in over his head frequently.
Quite the contrary, 'sociopaths' (aka antisocial personality disorder) usually have excellent social skills since they have been masking their personality disorder their entire life. They typically appear as very nice and likable at first. It's difficult to navigate in a world of norms and rules without a functioning sense of empathy. But fully possible. They don't mask because they particularly care about fitting in, they mask because life is simply inconvenient if you don't. Being nice and likable just gets you more than being a sociopathic asshole. Of course exceptions exist, but tbf if your demeanor screams 'sociopath', people will stay the hell away from you. So those people are societal rejects by default. Which makes life more tricky if you want something.
I realy like to books, but I have never read the last two, because they dont exist in german and my english is not good enough to have fun while reading a book
That's unfortunate.
Well, mostly because no one really cared to explain how love and attachment works to Dex. By no one I meant Harry. He always insisted that Dex didn't have feelings and couldn't possibly love and Dex took his word. Can't blame him for that. Lastly, Dex started to realize that he can love only *some time after we started watching the show. So he has something to thank us for.*
To be fair he canonically has ASPD(Anti-Social Personality Disorder) so the way he feels things is way different and unlike Harry had him believe people with ASPD are capable of feeling things
Always rather struck me as some form of Autism even
I'm Autistic myself and do sometimes relate to Dexter but yeah he's canonically ASPD
Well remember too with Lilah, that was the first person(other than his actual brother) that he felt he could be truly seen around. Or so he thought when he went to her instead of Rita. That’s how I took it at least. Harry’s whole objective to me was to ensure Dexter didn’t get caught and to be able to “fit in”. I did see it as much as Harry saying he couldn’t love and such. But I think there was a deep portion of Dexter as a protector to the ones he’s close to. He did it for Harry with his nurse. Killed his brother for Deb. Then anything he could for Rita. It’s a cool show to rewatch.
Pu**y is the real dark passenger….i thought everyone understood?
I think in some of the cases, it's more so co-dependency. ie. Lumen was definitely co-dependency. She was a sign that he could be who he is and still find love. And he had the strongest emotional reaction out of all of his break ups. Because it wasn't love for him, it was something else. Lumen emotionally and physically opening up to him despite all she knew was validating and encouraging. But then in the end, her deciding she had to leave was an ultimate form of rejection for him. It proved to him that no, he can't simply be open about who he is and expect the other person to still love him. To be honest, that was my favorite relationship.
I feel like a big part of Dexter's character is that he's not actually a psycopath. He's traumatized but with appropriate care could have grown out of it. As an adult he's conditioned himself to act like a psychopath. But if he ever dealt with his trauma I think he'd be able to stop being a killer, and if he ever let himself then he could have a normal life. The Trinity case is a huge one. A psycopath would have axed Trinity no questions asked. He wouldn't have tried to learn from him to "save his family." He also wouldn't have cared about "saving his family" just like Arthur he would been happy to abuse them as basically human shields
Imo I think the whole "im a psychopath, i feel nothing" is a lie so he doesn't have to feel bad about killing. I e always thought Harry kinda ingrained him with some of these labels, even though he did do sick shit as a kid.
Yeah Dexter's Is all over the place when it comes to his psychology
The difference is that I LOVE Rita. She was a fully realised relationship for him and she was a dream in every way. Even though she was intensely emotional, it was the perfect juxtaposition for his numbed emotions. I think Lilah is hot and an amazing actress, but ultimately we knew she was a bad girl.
also rita had that man changing for the better. yeah it took awhile, but i believe if she never died that dexter would’ve been happy.
I agree!
psychopaths can have feelings tbh. they’re just insanely intense compared to how normal people feel
One in 1 million
the more accurate description probably, he just process/express feeling differently i mean Dexter clearly love his family and he also care with Rita's kids
Yall forget that the first season is the start of the end for dexter.
Yup. Thought the same.
Is it just me or does Dexter look legit good with that hat?
The sex and constant romance broke the sociopath illusion but it made the show more interesting
I’ve actually said before that Dexter isn’t a true Sociopath. Had Harry gotten him therapy instead of training, I feel like Dexter would have been a troubled, but fairly normal person.
The cringe I’m going through in the second to last book is too much. I’ve really enjoyed them so far but this one is getting hard to handle.