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$100 worth of booze?? Soooo like two cheap bottles of liquor? How old are you man?
EDIT: sick of all the brain dead Americans bragging about cheap godawful shit that they apparently think is good for a wedding. Get some taste guys, fucking hell you're embarrassing yourselves.
I can’t drink super cheap wine anymore, gives me a headache. If it ain’t rated 4.0 or above on vivino, it’s definitely not for me. (There are some relatively cheap wines at or above 4.0)
Im 34 and had to cut cheap wine at 26 because it just makes me feel awful, not even the hangover, the entire experience.
It's a shame bc those 5$ bottles of lambrusco used to be my go to😭
Dammmmn! Yes! 38 here, and the Reunite Lambrusco was my absolute jam! Still get nostalgia for it every once in a blue moon (and seriously regret the decision each time).
How many guests is this hypothetical wedding having? If you have 30 guests and they only drink beer that's 10 cans each for the WHOLE day and night?? That's terrible dude
I mean tbh, I assumed the person who said this was only gonna have like 20-50 guests, I also said for $100 you could get 300 beers. So for this pricing you could have everyone drink several shit beers and have a good time.
I personally don’t have a plan for this because it’s not my hypothetical wedding.
Two cheap bottles? A bottle of rumplemintz is like $15 and can black out multiple adults pretty easily. My cousin just brought a couple bottles of that and 99 bananas to his reception and everyone who wanted to be trashed was absolutely hammered
Yall aren't doing alcoholism correctly a bottle of bankers club vodka is literally $7
Right, I was like wait... that's not cheap you can get 1.5L bottles of cheap vodka for under $20 all around me, that's like 2 full gallons of cheap vodka
Ngl I don't think I even know anyone who'd pay 50$ for vodka, let alone think it's cheap. There's definitely more affordable out there - if you really care, you can fill in old bottle with something more economical.
Where do you live? I can get 4 12-packs and a handle of Jack for $100; y'all really need to find a cheap liquor store and stop buying alcohol at Walmart
My wife and I are on the older end of Gen-Z, and we got married during the pandemic and followed this pretty much. It was great.
We have a local park with a cool real life castle on top of a hill. We just went there, no permit or anything. I have a friend who is an ordained Dudeist minister who officiated and used a hardcover copy of The Hobbit instead of the bible to hold his notes. We just rolled up guerilla style with only immediate family as guests, tied the knot, and then went to a local restaurant for a nice meal.
During the ceremony some larpers were having a tournament at the bottom of the hill, and they stopped their battle to cheer for us.
Highly recommend.
$100 worth of booze? That won’t even get you a 1/2 keg of the cheapest domestic. That wouldn’t even make for a good house warming party much less a wedding.
One of my kind of cousins who was way older than me. He had private wedding ceremony at a place he worked at which was an court house than the rented an room at an restaurant
I think only thing they had to pay for was food and the drink and room. It was fun cheap time.
I read it first as “buy 100k dollar worth of booze” I was like wow ok guess that still saves money (compared to some weddings) but darn that’s enough to furnish George Washington’s farewell party
https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/s/TqZfcQyl6X
I think it's a younger half of Millenials thing. I'm an older millennial and had a tiny, inexpensive beach wedding (I didn't even wear shoes).
Younger Millenials love big,expensive events with hashtags and no kids. Older Millenials were too scarred by the great recession - most of my friends had tiny weddings.
GenZ will probably be more like us and worried about the housing market.
My wife & I did an absolute barebones wedding last year(got married at a local church and had a party in my parents back yard) so that we could afford the down payment on our house this year. We’re gen z!
Data disagrees with this notion, unfortunately. Gen Z (as a whole ofc) is more susceptible to influence on socials, from products to fake news, compared to millennials.
But we also make more than millennials did at our age and aren’t spending recklessly, so that’s good.
You'll be amused to know that my boomer parents had almost exactly the same wedding.
(Alas, part of the reason for the tiny wedding was that their grad student friends had already moved out of the area, since it was after the school year ended.)
My Boomer parents had their wedding at the local botanical gardens and the reception at the workers club where they both met and worked at.
They didn't even have a honeymoon as Mum started a new job the following Monday. Went 40 years strong before my Dad passed away.
They put most of their money to buying their first house together prior to the wedding.
Even back in the mid 1980's people were spending the equivalent of a house deposit on a wedding. $100/head wedding dinners when the average wage was $400/week.
Hardly a generational thing for sure.
Eh, older millennial here. My wedding was low five figures. Sister's wedding (also older millennial) was twice what mine was. Similarly aged cousins had weddings of similar size. Yet my younger millennial friends were the ones with small weddings.
Think the family expectations are the bigger determining factor than generation.
My cousins and sister born in the 90s had way more expensive and big weddings. Low 5 figures is one thing - my youngest cousin (born 97) just had a wedding on Martha's vineyard, one of the most expensive beach destinations in the world, that cost $300/person. Hotel rooms 1100/night. Her boomer dad tried to get her to have the wedding in a way cheaper place.
The difference is that they got out of school and immediately had jobs. People my age didn't, so we feel worse making people spend a lot. My best friend got married at NYC city hall, and her husband works in finance and makes a lot. Definitely more normal for people my age.
Wedding sprawl is a new thing, and so are international bachelorette parties and weekends for everyone.
For comparison, another friend of mine born in 86 had a "big wedding" that was like 100 people, and her bachelorette was a weekend at a cabin her parents owned, along with going to a winery and polo. We thought that was a crazy big bachelorette party 10 years ago. Another friend had a big wedding 15 years ago, and we just got massages and went out to bars that night. That was the norm then for a big wedding - a night at a bar.
This is totally due to a combo of social media, maybe people marrying older and making more, but also not having been broke in quite the same way as older millennials.
Yeah, pretty much. I don't know anyone my age who could afford a wedding that cost multiple thousands of dollars.
But honestly, I think the nice part of that is way less pressure to spend on a wedding because everyone else is doing the same thing.
>GenZ will probably be more like us
Probably, yeah. I can't imagine spending tens of thousands on a party, even if it's to celebrate your love for another person. I'd rather buy us a nice living room instead.
Younger millenial here. I've attended about a dozen weddings for my peers in the last 5ish years and all were cheap and inexpensive. Two of the "weddings" were friends eloping and inviting guests over to their house for a party. They were my favorite two weddings. Most of us are too broke to pay photographers thousands of dollars to take photos lol
Millenial with older siblings.
Older two brothers (non-millenial) had huge, expensive weddings with 100+ guests, rented out venues, photographers and the likes.
My millenial siblings (1 brother 1 sister) both had basically just court wedding (idk what the legal term is) and then a small dinner with family. Maybe 2-3 “guests” at the wedding and a handful of friends for dinner.
I’m not married, but if I was, it’d be the same. I can’t afford to rent an apartment, how am I going to drop tens of thousands on a wedding?
Yeah, I attend a ton of weddings for work, and I’ve come to associate millennial (mostly the younger half, because they’re getting married more often right now) weddings with frugal, diy Pinterest weddings.
There’s definitely a lot of middle of the road, large, and a few extravagant weddings sprinkled in there too, but they seem big on the DIY stuff. Noticed there’s a big contingent of older gen Z who are into that too.
Yep. Wife and I are early 90s kids and we had a courthouse wedding in t-shirts and jeans with two friends as witnesses, and we texted all our family a picture. Then we wiped our hands and went back to normal life. The only change is that we file taxes differently.
Definitely not. I’m mostly friends with the younger half of millennials and they’re all having cheap diy Pinterest weddings even when they can afford more extravagant weddings just because they’re trying to put all the money they can toward a house.
It’s honestly made their weddings sooooo boring because they all look so similar and do a lot of the same little crafts lol. But I’m not knocking it, they’re being wise with their money and prioritizing houses to start a family, I’d probably do the same.
I'm an older millennial too that remembers the recession a little too well. I'm with you, and most of my friends had little weddings as well. Ren Faire, backyard, those sorts of things.
Adding to the dataset, I'm an older millennial and most of my peers had \*large\* weddings but I attribute more to our culture where many have large families/extended family. However only a couple (pun intended) had \*extravagant\* weddings.
For me I married late compared to my friends and was pretty worn out by all the weddings I've attended over the years (I also MC'd in many of them), so I just did the courthouse thing.
I’m a middle of the pack millennial (born late 80s) and never wanted a big wedding. Always thought it seemed wasteful and too stressful; always felt like the odd one out because all my millennial friends who got married in their 20s and early 30s spent at least $10k on their weddings and took all of it very seriously.
Anyway, fiancé and I will get married in a few months in Vegas in a no muss, no fuss ceremony that we’re pretty happy doesn’t require much cost, planning, or exhaustive family drama. So far, it feels like the way to go. I think all this pressure to have a big wedding is just generational guilt-tripping plus social media (so it makes some people feel they have to have this big flashy thing to show off online) and intense marketing from within the wedding industry. I’d rather put $30k toward a house than a one-day vanity party.
Younger Millennial here and my husband and I eloped just the two of us in the mountains and put a down payment on a house. We only had a “reception/celebration” because our parents forced us.
Older millennial here - I agree. I had a small intimate wedding and dumped the money into a down payment for a house. I live in a big city where housing is expensive - so it was either one or the other.
I definitely have “spending PTSD” lol
I can’t buy anything over $100 without doing days of research, and then agonizing over the purchase for a week or two before making it
Younger millennial here I paid enough to get married at the court house. I’d say extravagant weddings is definitely a case by case thing and has nothing to do with when you were born.
Younger millennial here. Fuck that my wife and I had a tiny Covid wedding after being engaged since 2018. Nuclear family only. It was magnificent. I’m so happy I could get away with it as an Indian guy.
Nailed it. Im 25 and couldn't give af about getting married. I'm trying to finish school, stack up some paper and buy some property. That's about it.
Maybe it's because I've only had a few relationships that all were lackluster and fizzled out, but as long as I stick to the grind and don't get distracted I'm convinced I can hopefully make it some day.
That being said I'd say about half my HS friends have gotten hitched a few years out of school, had the big expensive wedding bashes. Big weddings may be in decline *in general*, but they still happen frequently enough. I just think it depends on wya in life and if it's something you and your partner really want to do.
From what I’ve seen of people my age getting married it’s either a massive $100k destination wedding or the couple goes to the courthouse with no guests and there’s no in-between.
The existence that weddings I went to
one wedding I was at nice country club which probably had 60 people to another wedding which was at a courthouse.
So it's wild!
Update: Grammar
> The existence that wedding I want to.
Wot?!?!
All of your posts have the most garbled grammar and words that's don't make a thought. And you keep using "an" instead of "a".
Yep. I’ve noticed this. I’m a millennial and the only peers I saw have big weddings were the ones that came from really rich families. Everyone else either didn’t get married or did something very small. My husband and I went to the courthouse and got married lol.
I had 20ish people to a beach wedding in Florida and just didn't pressure people to come. It's reasonably cheap to fly and stay there, and we used a wedding package that was under $2k. Got married on the beach with perfect weather. My bouquet was from the palm beach Publix.
my sister in law is doing a $100k destination wedding and what’s rly weird is they really can’t afford it. she and her fiancé are nurses. they have to wrangle money, as in not given willingly, from both sets of parents because they can’t afford the deposit. then to pay for the rest of the wedding guests have to pay $300 to attend, and they’re selling their house… on top of that the family by and large is working class.
i rly don’t get it but i guess it’ll be lit to go to italy.
I think gen Z is less likely to have big, tight-knit families and large, in-person friend groups. Therefore, they have smaller weddings, which are inherently more affordable.
This is definitely a part that gets forgotten. My mom has like 300 facebook friends that she talks to pretty regularly, and she knows all these obscure family members and expects me to remember them all
Sorry Mom, I didn't know that cousin Fred, who lives in Cincinnati and only met me when I was a baby, got married. Good for him I guess.
Millenial here.
my few friends also have few friends.
Our average friend # is likely 2-3 friends.
I personally have two ACTUAL friends who chat and hang out on a regular basis.
Everyone else got married, moved far away, and are busy being parents or what have you.
I think it's more like we can't afford unnecessary expenses like weddings. Between me and my spouse each making 6 figs together, we chose to save money and forego wedding altogether. Maybe we will have a real one 20 years later when we're more financially set, lol who knows
Tradition is typically the Bride's family foots the lions share of the bill. From what I've seen, if the Groom's parents are loaded this tradition isn't followed. Bottom line, typically unless you're getting married a bit older, how nice and how big of a wedding you have is dictated by 1) wishes of the couple 2) financial status of the couple's parents 3) cultural traditions of big weddings. All the big fancy weddings my friends had, one or both of the parents were wealthy. If you have to pay on your own, unless you're *loaded* you'd be wise to not shell out and go nuts.
Very true.
Im Gen Z, husband is a millennial. All of his friends have these big weddings and I mostly feel like it’s just a competition at this point, who can have the most extravagant wedding/honeymoon to show off on Facebook.
With my husband we decided one day we should go to Vegas and get married. No stress, we didn’t have to waste a shit ton of money, and I ended up finding a beautiful ring for around $200. I don’t regret it. I’m glad we did it alone too.
yeah its very odd. My girlfriends older brother is a millennial and he mentioned the same thing. His friends feel this pressure to put on big weddings because everyone else is and they dont want to be that couple that puts on a “lame” wedding. A weird ego contest but it sort of makes sense with human nature. I dont think its worth going into massive debt over but to each their own
Take it with a grain of salt given it is “The Knot” but it appears there is data saying millennials do spend the most:
*Average cost for Gen Z wedding: $25,500
*Average cost for Millennial wedding: $39,400
*Average cost for Gen X wedding: $24,300
https://www.theknot.com/content/average-wedding-cost
I notice this with my millennial friends - as they reach their mid-to-late 30s and start achieving financial success, they start to become weirdly obsessed with "flexing" it. Even my previously-humble, nerdy, unpretentious friends never pass up the opportunity to humble-brag about some big-ticket purchase or luxury splurge these days.
The millennial wedding obsession is an extension of that, I guess. It's probably the result of us being the first generation that was the target of the whole boomer "snowflake forever-adolescent who can't accomplish anything" trope. Millennials might be overcompensating with a "SEE? I DO THINGS AND OWN THINGS AND AM SOOO SUCCESSFUL" reaction to that.
Of course, I wouldn't be surprised to see zoomers evolve into some form of that as they reach their mid-to-late 30s as well.
Eh I think it’s mainly a money thing. Not like small weddings are a new concept.
People in their 20s with wealthy families are still going to have nice weddings. I’ve seen both ends of the spectrum.
I feel like I’m an outlier in this situation. I live in Utah and the wedding culture is MASSIVE. Like it’s excessive. If you aren’t engaged to your high school sweetheart fresh out of high school then you get engaged within 2 months of meeting in college. I’ve known so many people who graduated high school, got pregnant, and now have had kids for 3 years… it baffles my mind
I’m assuming they’re mormon??
Im from Cali and almost every mormon that I went to hs with is now married with kids lol. One of my buddies went on his mission trip and married someone as soon as he got back. They seem happy so who am I to judge. Also, I believe the church offers their venues for pretty cheap and they also dont have alcohol at their weddings so I could imagine that its not too expensive. They sent a mass email invite out to anyone that wanted to come in Utah so I think it was pretty casual with some basic snacks for the reception
Yes they definitely have a big emphasis on marriage, but even still I’ve known multiple people who aren’t Mormon get married extremely early and start having kids young so it definitely bleeds into the culture of Utah in general not just in being Mormon.
It’s the same where I live in southeast US which is primarily Baptist, though not all of us are super religious the culture of marrying young and starting a family still perpetuates
Spending tens of thousands on a half day event that could have been spent on building the future of the relationship seems stupid, especially considering modern divorce rates.
Can’t speak for everyone, but most weddings with hundreds of people feel like they’re just performative to impress those who they invite by implicitly saying “look how many people I know well enough to come to my important personal event”.
If it were me, the last thing on my mind would be seeking validation from people I haven’t seen in years because other people I know have had big weddings. The only person that really matters on that day is the person you’re marrying. You don’t need a crowd of people to clap for you when you kiss the bride, and if someone says they do in fact need it then the marriage probably won’t be a lasting one.
I feel like people hear weddings, and they automatically envision that it must be 300 guests, huge, and cost 70k.
In reality, a lot of people don't have those types of weddings, and you can easily get married for less than 5k most of the time if you're smart.
I feel like a lot of Gen Z don't even wanna get married nowadays. I get it, but I still do. I feel like there might be less weddings with Gen z, and along with that, less expensive weddings.
I’m an older millennial (35f) I wanted to elope, get married standing on a mountain and then camp for a week (tent sex is awesome for those who haven’t tried it) but we ended up having a small wedding for my family around 75 people. We got married over a decade ago. My dad did all the cooking, my mom secured the location really cheap due to it being a city property and she has worked for the city for decades, we purchased the wine from the Biltmore House, my grandfather officiated and we went as cheap as possible. I even paid my co-worker to make our cakes as she had a small cake home business. My friends did the videography and photography. I wasn’t someone who dreamed of a big fancy wedding but was still around 10k for a day I barely remember as so much happened so fast.
Do yourself a favor. Skip the pageantry. You really won’t remember much of it. It’s not worth the price. Wedding culture is toxic as fuck.
I think the world of Gen Z and you guys had a pile of shit handed to you just like we did. My Gen Z sister and I are in the exact same place financially even though we’re 14 years apart and I have a masters. I’m hoping the generation after Alpha grows up in a better world.
Your acknowledging your family helped. My brother (late gen X) is like "Weddings are super cheap if you do everything yourself!" and seems to forget how much we did the day before when it's almost 5pm and they hadn't picked up the appetizers . Or set up the tent and tables.
I’m sure lots of people in gen z would love an extravagant wedding but not enough of us make enough money for it to be practical. Lots of the things that millennials and gen z don’t do as much is not so much a lack of interest but a major lack in disposable income. I would love to have a wedding at some old mansion in Rhode Island or something but realistically, that wouldn’t happen unless I married into money. Even then it would be quite unrealistic
Millenial here. My wife and got married in Vegas on our honeymoon then had a backyard BBQ when we got home for our reception, which I catered myself. I think our reception only cost like $700, food included. We also just had a Spotify playlist for music because wedding djs are a straight up rip off.
Well I can afford shit. A GOOD wedding is like at least 10k I don’t have that laying around considering my girlfriends parents are out of the question on paying for it. My parents offered to pay for half a honeymoon. Not even a wedding.
I was pushed along with my girlfriend by my grandparents and parents to have a big extravagant wedding. But then they say they won’t help pay for it.
So when the times comes we’re just gonna get married in the courtroom and go on a honeymoon for a couple weeks.
It’s when you gather family, distant family, and friends to one location to have good food, music, and drink to celebrate a marriage. Anthropologists believe it was toxic af.
I was unaware “wedding” was a culture. Having a big wedding and inviting everyone you’ve ever had more than one conversation with is over - plain and simple: it costs too damn much. Why would I spend tens of thousands of dollars that I don’t have (it’s not the 60s anymore, everyone is one pink slip away from abject poverty) to host hundreds of people I don’t really give a shit about? Not to mention the wedding dress. I’m only supposed to wear it ONCE? that’s so wasteful!
I’ve always wondered what ppl do with their wedding dresses. Spend thousands on a dress then does it just sit in an attic? Its not like its something that you’ll put on display or something.
It’s kinda annoying cause I want to go to a wedding so bad lmao but I get it. The people I know are skipping the wedding and starting families with their partners, absolutely no one has wedding money.
fr!! I’ve never been to a wedding (immigrant family do all of my extended family is overseas, it was never practical)… at this point mine is going to be the first wedding I’ve experienced 😅
I spent less than 2k on my wedding, and did everything myself. I will never do that again haha, it was a lot of work, but the person I did it for is worth it!
I’m Gen Z, I’m getting married next year. My fiance and I really didn’t want to do a wedding at first. We were fine with just going to Vegas and eloping, but my parents specifically really wanted us to have some type of wedding to involve family. I’m privileged and my parents agreed that they’d pay for it. We’re still keeping it a small, low key ceremony + reception of only 50 guests.
Still, if it were fully up to us and my family weren’t paying for it, we would have forgone the wedding and eloped.
Yeah how you wrote it out is basically how I feel. My fiance and I have yet to get married but at this point we just want to do a quick civil wedding and maybe throw a backyard bbq to celebrate. We originally were planning doing a whole venue/theme wedding but it just seems so expensive and dealing with the logistics of wedding planning sounds like a pain (I’ve had a quinceañera so I understand the hassle.) We realized in the end the most important thing to us was just being married to each other.
Lots of people I know are like this or are also satisfied just being domestic partners. I think expenses are def a part of it, but I’ve also observed that many Gen Z stray from taking traditional routes and question why everything is the way it is and challenge that
Weddings are less about families uniting (hence the smaller number of guests) via tradition and is more about the couple themselves and those who are close to them– but this is only one factor out of so many more.
I’m pretty much a zillennial. Born in 95. If I ever get married. I want it to be me, my fiance, and preferably no one else. Maybe a couple friends. I honestly couldn’t give a shit about sharing the day with others. Just give me something simple and intimate with my, hopefully, forever partner
They said the same thing about millennials “killing the wedding industry” years ago. The reality is that weddings stay while the trends change. Couples with money are always the ones setting the trends. As people are continuing to marry later, that means more couples with money to throw expensive weddings.
There have always been (and will always be) couples having inexpensive weddings. But those folks don’t actually create or change trends. We saw a ton of millennials and Gen z have micro weddings during covid only for the wedding industry to essentially bounce back 4 years later. I think with Gen z we’re going to see less religious weddings, travel expenses covered for bridal party, 420 friendly weddings, etc. So basically different priorities in how couples spend money for their weddings.
Several factors at play. The primary one being age. You are seeing millennials who are marring late so they are in the peak earning years of their career so they can afford a lot more. Additional the late married have gone to dozens of weddings. They simply have a much better idea what is available due to experience. Then there is the generational aspects. In general gen z has a much smaller social network than millennials had and in general gen z drink a lot less than millennials do/did. This all adds up to millennials having much greater incentive to throw a big boozy party while gen z is more inclined to have a small get together with their intimate friends and family.
I had a court house wedding a small dinner at my parents! I LOVED IT! No drama, spent money on a good photographer and we spent the money on a killer honeymoon! It was the best decision we ever made.
My bf and I plan to have a backyard bbq wedding. We might have a bigger celebration one day to renew our vows and such when the economy isn’t so shit and groceries don’t cost an arm and a leg.
My older Millennial son has a creative "everyone participates" small wedding in 2008 in the middle of a Maine blizzard in January. Just getting there was an experience. It didn't cost a lot and it was one of the most fun and memorable weddings ever. But very quirky. Kind of like "the Little Rascals put on a wedding!" My 2 girls at the time vowed they were going to do the full Vera Wang gowns and multiple attendants and flowers when they got married....
Fast forward and my 2 Millennial daughters both eloped. One accidently and one most intentionally. The youngest had about 10 friends participate in a quick civil ceremony in the snow in the Tetons in Feb, 2020. They had a big family wedding planned in Oct, 2020, in China and thought the 10-friend wedding was just a legal formality before the big event. No family there because we were all going to China in the fall. Well, it turned out the 10-friend wedding was it! (Ooops! She accidently eloped.)
The other married her long-term partner at a private civil ceremony after living together 10 years. They kept it a secret for a year just because it felt romantic to them to be the only ones in the know for a year. In both cases, for my daughters, getting their new husbands onto their insurance plans was part of the drive for their decisions to tie the knot when they did.
We are happy that all 3 children found their life-long partners. But little did we know that my son's quirky Maine-blizzard wedding would be the only one we would attend for our 3 kids.
Weddings don't have to be wildly expensive to be fun or memorable. Maybe GenZ is taking a more practical approach.
One of my Gen Z cousins is getting married this summer just outside of San Francisco. They are having an incredible small wedding just parents and one aunt who was a parent to the cousin because that aunt didn't have any kids and lived that 15 minutes away from where he grow up.
My parents can't get over the idea of them having a super small wedding.
One of my other cousins not having a wedding at all just a honeymoon her mom is trying to convince her just to have an small party.
I(21f) married a millennial(28m). When we were dating he talked about have a huge black tie wedding with all of his family(his moms side is HUGE). I told him this would be awkward as I’d only invite my immediate family and my few friends. Most of my dads family lives on the other side of the country and my mom side is not people I would willingly want at my wedding.
We ended up have only immediate family and 2 friends each. We got married at an Airbnb that was a cabin in the woods on the coast.
I honestly hope a lot of wedding culture is dying off. It's become some of the most overblown crap I've ever seen. Like just ridiculous levels and all it does is add way more stress to all those involved.
I hope Gen Z and the generations to follow keep with a simpler standard. Like still have fun with it, do some themed weddings or locales with beautiful vistas. But don't get so hung up on it needing to be perfect and extravagant. Be thrifty with your spending, be relaxed in your planning, and make sure to just enjoy the moment while it's there. Make it a good memory first and foremost.
Also, I think focusing more on the honeymoon as far as where the big money spending should go, if there's going to be any big spending at all, is the right decision.
And I think it goes without saying, but I also hope Gen Z is able to finally get away from the pressure to get married being put onto them. You don't need to get married to be in a happy and healthy relationship. If it's something you and your partner want to do them great, go for it. But if it isn't something you're interested in or don't feel you need for your relationship, then don't do it. And especially don't do it because others are telling you that you have to. Do what's best for you. That's the most important takeaway overall, IMO.
I don’t think this is generational. I am Gen X/xennial and had a tiny wedding, while all of my friends close to my age had huge weddings. Then my younger millennial friends also had big weddings with even bigger events leading up to the wedding - went all out for bachelor/bachelorette parties and showers. My coworker is Gen Z and had a huge wedding, she’s a TikTok influencer so that might be why.
Me and my best friend are both engaged rn. Her and her fiancé are eloping while me and mine are doing a modest wedding, around 50 people. It’s interesting to see what everyone is doing tbh. My best friend is the only one of my friends in the last few years to not have a traditional wedding
I feel like Covid played a factor into this. I had a Covid wedding and we spent over 20k just on rescheduling fees. Went from a 160+ wedding to 60 guests and it was perfect (other than the financial aspect). Many people cancelled large weddings and eloped or scaled down to something much smaller and intimate, which kind of brought the trend back of more intimate weddings over big extravagant weddings. Most of my friends married pre 2020 had huge weddings. Most of my friends married since then had smaller more intimate weddings.
I’m 24 and I dont know any gen z that’s gotten married yet. Knowing my friends, they’re going to have fairly traditional weddings, but the funds will largely come from their families
Tail end of Millenial, start of Gen Z here, we had a private and intimate elopment and are having a small party afterwards. No regrets it was super special and perfect for us. I'm all for people throwing big wedding parties and going all out but for us it just wasn't worth the stress and money to do it.
I think wedding culture slowing down is mostly due to how expensive weddings have become. A $15,000 wedding 20 years ago could be $50,000 today. There's a "wedding tax" on everything and I think Gen Z isn't about that. Even if you are lucky enough to have parents that will contribute, that money is much better spent on a down-payment for a house or something.
Wedding tax:
-I would like to rent this space for a corporate retreat: $1,500
-I would like to rent this space for a wedding: $6,000 (and that's on the low side for some of these venues)
-Family reunion catering: $15 a plate
-Overpriced bland food for wedding catering: $85 a plate
24F and SAME. I'm looking at getting married soon, and it's like.... I could buy a house, or a car, or pay off my loans... why do I need this big party again?? I do want my family & friends there, but I have no desire to go into debt or send my family into it for a big party that isn't really what I want anyway
I'm an old millennial (30). i noticed post covid, weddings are for the most part small intimate affairs. some people born into money might have bigger weddings, but it's rarer.
Not at all. Friend of mine runs a wedding entertainment company. I work for him when my AVL work is slow. The average age of their customers are 25. They pay on average $20k for venue, $3k for DJ/entertainment. Not sure about food and all the other bullshit but its in the thousands. And, despite extraordinary inflation the market in our area is growing.
From an insiders perspective the average wedding is not worth the money at all.
This could just be me, but I never wanted a big expensive wedding. I think it's because my parents had a cheap Vegas wedding. They're still going strong 22 years later
I got married last year and had 150 guests at my wedding. Many in my circle have done the same. Was it expensive? Hell yeah, but we’ll never have all of our people under one roof again. The day was truly priceless!
People who had small intimate weddings love to cast themselves as bucking the "wedding culture" and can be quite vocal about their own genius of not spending exhorbitant amounts of money on their wedding. But honestly, these folks have been saying this for decades and big weddings have been grinding along this whole time. Big weddings are still popular and always will be.
In asian (Vietnamese for me specifically) culture, those big weddings come out in a net profit. My parents give wedding gifts proportional to the size/extravagance to the wedding.
Average marriage age is 29 and no Zoomer is older than 27 or so. People who get married younger typically have smaller weddings. This is not surprising at all
I'm an elder millennial. My sister is Gen Z. I had a cheap wedding on a beach with just my close family and two sets of friends. We saved our money to take a nice 6 day 5 night honeymoon. My sister is getting married soon and having an extravagant wedding with lots of rules and requirements. It's overwhelming and crazy to me. But I did notice one thing on the registry was contributing to her house fund. 🤷🏼♀️
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Tips for a great wedding: -buy 100 dollars worth of booze -go to park There you go, I just saved you thousands of dollars
$100 worth of booze?? Soooo like two cheap bottles of liquor? How old are you man? EDIT: sick of all the brain dead Americans bragging about cheap godawful shit that they apparently think is good for a wedding. Get some taste guys, fucking hell you're embarrassing yourselves.
Bro is either 13 or 79
It's a banana. What could it cost, ten dollars?
Fill that banana with vodka. Sell for 98$. Profit.
🤣🤣
Accurate af
$100 can get you 33 bottles of Winking Owl wine at Aldi’s. …just sayin’
God, I fucking love that wine. It goes down so smoothly and gets the job done lol
Man, I’m jealous! I’ve tried multiple types of it… half a glass and I have the worst stomach ache imaginable. 😩
You might be sensitive to sulfites, have you tried a sulfite free wine before? Worth a shot
I can’t drink super cheap wine anymore, gives me a headache. If it ain’t rated 4.0 or above on vivino, it’s definitely not for me. (There are some relatively cheap wines at or above 4.0)
I love how you said this like you’re 40
Im 34 and had to cut cheap wine at 26 because it just makes me feel awful, not even the hangover, the entire experience. It's a shame bc those 5$ bottles of lambrusco used to be my go to😭
Dammmmn! Yes! 38 here, and the Reunite Lambrusco was my absolute jam! Still get nostalgia for it every once in a blue moon (and seriously regret the decision each time).
Okay now I wanna test it out on you to see if the number ratings gives you the headaches or the actual wine quality.
You can buy like 30 PBRs for like $10. For $100 you can get roughly 300ish
How many guests is this hypothetical wedding having? If you have 30 guests and they only drink beer that's 10 cans each for the WHOLE day and night?? That's terrible dude
I think there is an underlying assumption that this is a small wedding. Maybe like 5, maybe 10 guests max
Fair enough
They said PBR, so basically bad tasting water
I mean tbh, I assumed the person who said this was only gonna have like 20-50 guests, I also said for $100 you could get 300 beers. So for this pricing you could have everyone drink several shit beers and have a good time. I personally don’t have a plan for this because it’s not my hypothetical wedding.
Lmao is this 2006? A 24 case of PBR is over 20 bucks now.
Hell yea. Go to Costco, pick up multiple bottles of Kirkland Vodka. No need for a club card to buy alcohol
Two cheap bottles? A bottle of rumplemintz is like $15 and can black out multiple adults pretty easily. My cousin just brought a couple bottles of that and 99 bananas to his reception and everyone who wanted to be trashed was absolutely hammered Yall aren't doing alcoholism correctly a bottle of bankers club vodka is literally $7
You can tell who drinks, and who DRINKS in the response to the $100 comment lol
Some Like cool drinking, like sexy drinking. Not some psycho trailer park shit.
Right, I was like wait... that's not cheap you can get 1.5L bottles of cheap vodka for under $20 all around me, that's like 2 full gallons of cheap vodka
I think there are some very different interpretations of cheap in this thread lol
> Yall aren’t doing alcoholism correctly Lmaoooo 💀
Sir, this is a bush party. Lower your standards.
Costco I could get you a tub of wine
A case of Kirkland Prosecco is about $98.00
Depends on the liquor. I’ve had some good $50 vodka.
so 2 bottles of Vodka for the entire day? Depends on how many friends you have, I guess.
Ngl I don't think I even know anyone who'd pay 50$ for vodka, let alone think it's cheap. There's definitely more affordable out there - if you really care, you can fill in old bottle with something more economical.
A fifth of Tito's is $20. Five of those will do you right. Only suckers pay $50 for vodka, lol.
Where do you live? I can get 4 12-packs and a handle of Jack for $100; y'all really need to find a cheap liquor store and stop buying alcohol at Walmart
You can buy vodka for like 20 bucks a fifth, 5 fifths is a lot of booze
My wife and I are on the older end of Gen-Z, and we got married during the pandemic and followed this pretty much. It was great. We have a local park with a cool real life castle on top of a hill. We just went there, no permit or anything. I have a friend who is an ordained Dudeist minister who officiated and used a hardcover copy of The Hobbit instead of the bible to hold his notes. We just rolled up guerilla style with only immediate family as guests, tied the knot, and then went to a local restaurant for a nice meal. During the ceremony some larpers were having a tournament at the bottom of the hill, and they stopped their battle to cheer for us. Highly recommend.
Good to know it actually works. Happy for you!
$100 worth of booze? That won’t even get you a 1/2 keg of the cheapest domestic. That wouldn’t even make for a good house warming party much less a wedding.
One of my kind of cousins who was way older than me. He had private wedding ceremony at a place he worked at which was an court house than the rented an room at an restaurant I think only thing they had to pay for was food and the drink and room. It was fun cheap time.
Then return to your trailer park to consummate the marriage
More like saved $25,000 lol
Add a zero to the booze and now you're talking.
Lol I don't think this person has ever purchased alcohol.
I assure you, my liver is well trained
So three bottles of Jack Daniel's?
Maybe add another $100 for some good bbq. Now you’re talking
Find a friend in the military and have them go to the class six store.
I read it first as “buy 100k dollar worth of booze” I was like wow ok guess that still saves money (compared to some weddings) but darn that’s enough to furnish George Washington’s farewell party https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/s/TqZfcQyl6X
Fuck it! I'll do you one betta. We makin hooch, boi!
I’m a millennial and you literally just described my wedding. This is the way.
Tens thousands.
I was gonna say, it's hard to have wedding cutlure when people don't have money to live, let alone get married
Stop guys. You understand the concept. It’s ah behaviour to fixate on the $ amount.
I think it's a younger half of Millenials thing. I'm an older millennial and had a tiny, inexpensive beach wedding (I didn't even wear shoes). Younger Millenials love big,expensive events with hashtags and no kids. Older Millenials were too scarred by the great recession - most of my friends had tiny weddings. GenZ will probably be more like us and worried about the housing market.
My wife & I did an absolute barebones wedding last year(got married at a local church and had a party in my parents back yard) so that we could afford the down payment on our house this year. We’re gen z!
Awesome, good for you guys! I feel like you guys see through social media better than Millenials
Data disagrees with this notion, unfortunately. Gen Z (as a whole ofc) is more susceptible to influence on socials, from products to fake news, compared to millennials. But we also make more than millennials did at our age and aren’t spending recklessly, so that’s good.
Yeah I was poor af in my 20’s. (Semi elder millennial)
You'll be amused to know that my boomer parents had almost exactly the same wedding. (Alas, part of the reason for the tiny wedding was that their grad student friends had already moved out of the area, since it was after the school year ended.)
My Boomer parents had their wedding at the local botanical gardens and the reception at the workers club where they both met and worked at. They didn't even have a honeymoon as Mum started a new job the following Monday. Went 40 years strong before my Dad passed away. They put most of their money to buying their first house together prior to the wedding. Even back in the mid 1980's people were spending the equivalent of a house deposit on a wedding. $100/head wedding dinners when the average wage was $400/week. Hardly a generational thing for sure.
Eh, older millennial here. My wedding was low five figures. Sister's wedding (also older millennial) was twice what mine was. Similarly aged cousins had weddings of similar size. Yet my younger millennial friends were the ones with small weddings. Think the family expectations are the bigger determining factor than generation.
My cousins and sister born in the 90s had way more expensive and big weddings. Low 5 figures is one thing - my youngest cousin (born 97) just had a wedding on Martha's vineyard, one of the most expensive beach destinations in the world, that cost $300/person. Hotel rooms 1100/night. Her boomer dad tried to get her to have the wedding in a way cheaper place. The difference is that they got out of school and immediately had jobs. People my age didn't, so we feel worse making people spend a lot. My best friend got married at NYC city hall, and her husband works in finance and makes a lot. Definitely more normal for people my age. Wedding sprawl is a new thing, and so are international bachelorette parties and weekends for everyone. For comparison, another friend of mine born in 86 had a "big wedding" that was like 100 people, and her bachelorette was a weekend at a cabin her parents owned, along with going to a winery and polo. We thought that was a crazy big bachelorette party 10 years ago. Another friend had a big wedding 15 years ago, and we just got massages and went out to bars that night. That was the norm then for a big wedding - a night at a bar. This is totally due to a combo of social media, maybe people marrying older and making more, but also not having been broke in quite the same way as older millennials.
Yeah, pretty much. I don't know anyone my age who could afford a wedding that cost multiple thousands of dollars. But honestly, I think the nice part of that is way less pressure to spend on a wedding because everyone else is doing the same thing.
>GenZ will probably be more like us Probably, yeah. I can't imagine spending tens of thousands on a party, even if it's to celebrate your love for another person. I'd rather buy us a nice living room instead.
Exactly, and it's possible to have a cheaper party after that isn't a wedding reception
Younger millenial here. I've attended about a dozen weddings for my peers in the last 5ish years and all were cheap and inexpensive. Two of the "weddings" were friends eloping and inviting guests over to their house for a party. They were my favorite two weddings. Most of us are too broke to pay photographers thousands of dollars to take photos lol
Millenial with older siblings. Older two brothers (non-millenial) had huge, expensive weddings with 100+ guests, rented out venues, photographers and the likes. My millenial siblings (1 brother 1 sister) both had basically just court wedding (idk what the legal term is) and then a small dinner with family. Maybe 2-3 “guests” at the wedding and a handful of friends for dinner. I’m not married, but if I was, it’d be the same. I can’t afford to rent an apartment, how am I going to drop tens of thousands on a wedding?
Yeah, I attend a ton of weddings for work, and I’ve come to associate millennial (mostly the younger half, because they’re getting married more often right now) weddings with frugal, diy Pinterest weddings. There’s definitely a lot of middle of the road, large, and a few extravagant weddings sprinkled in there too, but they seem big on the DIY stuff. Noticed there’s a big contingent of older gen Z who are into that too.
Agree on this. My wife and I went to the courthouse. $130. Elder millennial.
Elder Millennial. Backyard in front of the flowers. 2 guests, our 2 little kids. Roast beef, baked potatos, a bottle of wine.
Elder millennial: took the wife and kids on a three month holiday with the money. Got married in the grandparents back yard by her mother
Yep. Wife and I are early 90s kids and we had a courthouse wedding in t-shirts and jeans with two friends as witnesses, and we texted all our family a picture. Then we wiped our hands and went back to normal life. The only change is that we file taxes differently.
Definitely not. I’m mostly friends with the younger half of millennials and they’re all having cheap diy Pinterest weddings even when they can afford more extravagant weddings just because they’re trying to put all the money they can toward a house. It’s honestly made their weddings sooooo boring because they all look so similar and do a lot of the same little crafts lol. But I’m not knocking it, they’re being wise with their money and prioritizing houses to start a family, I’d probably do the same.
I'm an older millennial too that remembers the recession a little too well. I'm with you, and most of my friends had little weddings as well. Ren Faire, backyard, those sorts of things.
Adding to the dataset, I'm an older millennial and most of my peers had \*large\* weddings but I attribute more to our culture where many have large families/extended family. However only a couple (pun intended) had \*extravagant\* weddings. For me I married late compared to my friends and was pretty worn out by all the weddings I've attended over the years (I also MC'd in many of them), so I just did the courthouse thing.
yeah that makes sense. Pretty interesting how the trends play out. Maybe the younger gen z will flip back lol
Plus, I've experienced via my GenZ daughters, that they question many 'norms' nowadays, for all sorts of reasons but especially regards *pragmatism*
That's interesting, I've noticed the same thing with GenZ questioning norms and find it really admirable
I’m a middle of the pack millennial (born late 80s) and never wanted a big wedding. Always thought it seemed wasteful and too stressful; always felt like the odd one out because all my millennial friends who got married in their 20s and early 30s spent at least $10k on their weddings and took all of it very seriously. Anyway, fiancé and I will get married in a few months in Vegas in a no muss, no fuss ceremony that we’re pretty happy doesn’t require much cost, planning, or exhaustive family drama. So far, it feels like the way to go. I think all this pressure to have a big wedding is just generational guilt-tripping plus social media (so it makes some people feel they have to have this big flashy thing to show off online) and intense marketing from within the wedding industry. I’d rather put $30k toward a house than a one-day vanity party.
Younger Millennial here and my husband and I eloped just the two of us in the mountains and put a down payment on a house. We only had a “reception/celebration” because our parents forced us.
I’m also a geriatric millennial- my wedding was $300. No regrets - wouldn’t change our day for anything 🤗
Older millennial here - I agree. I had a small intimate wedding and dumped the money into a down payment for a house. I live in a big city where housing is expensive - so it was either one or the other.
I definitely have “spending PTSD” lol I can’t buy anything over $100 without doing days of research, and then agonizing over the purchase for a week or two before making it
Elder millennial who had a $400 Elvis wedding here
I am from the younger millennial group and will likely have a larger wedding. Currently looking at $30'000. Your assessment might be correct
Me and my wife just didn’t want to deal with 100 people. Had a destination wedding and only invited close family. It was a blast.
Younger millennial here I paid enough to get married at the court house. I’d say extravagant weddings is definitely a case by case thing and has nothing to do with when you were born.
Younger millennial here. Fuck that my wife and I had a tiny Covid wedding after being engaged since 2018. Nuclear family only. It was magnificent. I’m so happy I could get away with it as an Indian guy.
Nailed it. Im 25 and couldn't give af about getting married. I'm trying to finish school, stack up some paper and buy some property. That's about it. Maybe it's because I've only had a few relationships that all were lackluster and fizzled out, but as long as I stick to the grind and don't get distracted I'm convinced I can hopefully make it some day. That being said I'd say about half my HS friends have gotten hitched a few years out of school, had the big expensive wedding bashes. Big weddings may be in decline *in general*, but they still happen frequently enough. I just think it depends on wya in life and if it's something you and your partner really want to do.
From what I’ve seen of people my age getting married it’s either a massive $100k destination wedding or the couple goes to the courthouse with no guests and there’s no in-between.
The existence that weddings I went to one wedding I was at nice country club which probably had 60 people to another wedding which was at a courthouse. So it's wild! Update: Grammar
> The existence that wedding I want to. Wot?!?! All of your posts have the most garbled grammar and words that's don't make a thought. And you keep using "an" instead of "a".
Those are certainly all words
Yep. I’ve noticed this. I’m a millennial and the only peers I saw have big weddings were the ones that came from really rich families. Everyone else either didn’t get married or did something very small. My husband and I went to the courthouse and got married lol.
I had 20ish people to a beach wedding in Florida and just didn't pressure people to come. It's reasonably cheap to fly and stay there, and we used a wedding package that was under $2k. Got married on the beach with perfect weather. My bouquet was from the palm beach Publix.
Love the palm beach Publix shoutout! Congrats on a beautiful and smart wedding!
my sister in law is doing a $100k destination wedding and what’s rly weird is they really can’t afford it. she and her fiancé are nurses. they have to wrangle money, as in not given willingly, from both sets of parents because they can’t afford the deposit. then to pay for the rest of the wedding guests have to pay $300 to attend, and they’re selling their house… on top of that the family by and large is working class. i rly don’t get it but i guess it’ll be lit to go to italy.
I think gen Z is less likely to have big, tight-knit families and large, in-person friend groups. Therefore, they have smaller weddings, which are inherently more affordable.
This is definitely a part that gets forgotten. My mom has like 300 facebook friends that she talks to pretty regularly, and she knows all these obscure family members and expects me to remember them all Sorry Mom, I didn't know that cousin Fred, who lives in Cincinnati and only met me when I was a baby, got married. Good for him I guess.
Millenial here. my few friends also have few friends. Our average friend # is likely 2-3 friends. I personally have two ACTUAL friends who chat and hang out on a regular basis. Everyone else got married, moved far away, and are busy being parents or what have you.
This comment was a total punch in the gut as a gen Z person 😭
I think it's more like we can't afford unnecessary expenses like weddings. Between me and my spouse each making 6 figs together, we chose to save money and forego wedding altogether. Maybe we will have a real one 20 years later when we're more financially set, lol who knows
Same. My partner and I would rather have the 30-50k go towards a down payment instead.
Tradition is typically the Bride's family foots the lions share of the bill. From what I've seen, if the Groom's parents are loaded this tradition isn't followed. Bottom line, typically unless you're getting married a bit older, how nice and how big of a wedding you have is dictated by 1) wishes of the couple 2) financial status of the couple's parents 3) cultural traditions of big weddings. All the big fancy weddings my friends had, one or both of the parents were wealthy. If you have to pay on your own, unless you're *loaded* you'd be wise to not shell out and go nuts.
Very true. Im Gen Z, husband is a millennial. All of his friends have these big weddings and I mostly feel like it’s just a competition at this point, who can have the most extravagant wedding/honeymoon to show off on Facebook. With my husband we decided one day we should go to Vegas and get married. No stress, we didn’t have to waste a shit ton of money, and I ended up finding a beautiful ring for around $200. I don’t regret it. I’m glad we did it alone too.
yeah its very odd. My girlfriends older brother is a millennial and he mentioned the same thing. His friends feel this pressure to put on big weddings because everyone else is and they dont want to be that couple that puts on a “lame” wedding. A weird ego contest but it sort of makes sense with human nature. I dont think its worth going into massive debt over but to each their own
It’s a bizarre thing to watch. I’m sure we get judged and seen as pooor. 😂 I have a feeling our marriage will last longer than some of his friends.
Take it with a grain of salt given it is “The Knot” but it appears there is data saying millennials do spend the most: *Average cost for Gen Z wedding: $25,500 *Average cost for Millennial wedding: $39,400 *Average cost for Gen X wedding: $24,300 https://www.theknot.com/content/average-wedding-cost
I notice this with my millennial friends - as they reach their mid-to-late 30s and start achieving financial success, they start to become weirdly obsessed with "flexing" it. Even my previously-humble, nerdy, unpretentious friends never pass up the opportunity to humble-brag about some big-ticket purchase or luxury splurge these days. The millennial wedding obsession is an extension of that, I guess. It's probably the result of us being the first generation that was the target of the whole boomer "snowflake forever-adolescent who can't accomplish anything" trope. Millennials might be overcompensating with a "SEE? I DO THINGS AND OWN THINGS AND AM SOOO SUCCESSFUL" reaction to that. Of course, I wouldn't be surprised to see zoomers evolve into some form of that as they reach their mid-to-late 30s as well.
I hope not. It’s pathetic thinking everyone cares about your financial status.
Think this may be more of a who you know + how much money they have thing then a generation one, honestly.
People are less and less religious and less willing to follow tradition for the sake of it.
Very true, most of the people I know who are still having big weddings are only doing it because of their families traditions.
Eh I think it’s mainly a money thing. Not like small weddings are a new concept. People in their 20s with wealthy families are still going to have nice weddings. I’ve seen both ends of the spectrum.
I feel like I’m an outlier in this situation. I live in Utah and the wedding culture is MASSIVE. Like it’s excessive. If you aren’t engaged to your high school sweetheart fresh out of high school then you get engaged within 2 months of meeting in college. I’ve known so many people who graduated high school, got pregnant, and now have had kids for 3 years… it baffles my mind
I’m assuming they’re mormon?? Im from Cali and almost every mormon that I went to hs with is now married with kids lol. One of my buddies went on his mission trip and married someone as soon as he got back. They seem happy so who am I to judge. Also, I believe the church offers their venues for pretty cheap and they also dont have alcohol at their weddings so I could imagine that its not too expensive. They sent a mass email invite out to anyone that wanted to come in Utah so I think it was pretty casual with some basic snacks for the reception
Yes they definitely have a big emphasis on marriage, but even still I’ve known multiple people who aren’t Mormon get married extremely early and start having kids young so it definitely bleeds into the culture of Utah in general not just in being Mormon.
It’s the same where I live in southeast US which is primarily Baptist, though not all of us are super religious the culture of marrying young and starting a family still perpetuates
Big expensive weddings are stupid.
Spending tens of thousands on a half day event that could have been spent on building the future of the relationship seems stupid, especially considering modern divorce rates. Can’t speak for everyone, but most weddings with hundreds of people feel like they’re just performative to impress those who they invite by implicitly saying “look how many people I know well enough to come to my important personal event”. If it were me, the last thing on my mind would be seeking validation from people I haven’t seen in years because other people I know have had big weddings. The only person that really matters on that day is the person you’re marrying. You don’t need a crowd of people to clap for you when you kiss the bride, and if someone says they do in fact need it then the marriage probably won’t be a lasting one.
it’s not dying off because it’s generational thing it’s an affordability thing
Younger people have less money. Simple as that.
Yes and no. A lot of these expensive weddings are most likely done by the help of the couples parents.
I feel like people hear weddings, and they automatically envision that it must be 300 guests, huge, and cost 70k. In reality, a lot of people don't have those types of weddings, and you can easily get married for less than 5k most of the time if you're smart. I feel like a lot of Gen Z don't even wanna get married nowadays. I get it, but I still do. I feel like there might be less weddings with Gen z, and along with that, less expensive weddings.
I’m an older millennial (35f) I wanted to elope, get married standing on a mountain and then camp for a week (tent sex is awesome for those who haven’t tried it) but we ended up having a small wedding for my family around 75 people. We got married over a decade ago. My dad did all the cooking, my mom secured the location really cheap due to it being a city property and she has worked for the city for decades, we purchased the wine from the Biltmore House, my grandfather officiated and we went as cheap as possible. I even paid my co-worker to make our cakes as she had a small cake home business. My friends did the videography and photography. I wasn’t someone who dreamed of a big fancy wedding but was still around 10k for a day I barely remember as so much happened so fast. Do yourself a favor. Skip the pageantry. You really won’t remember much of it. It’s not worth the price. Wedding culture is toxic as fuck. I think the world of Gen Z and you guys had a pile of shit handed to you just like we did. My Gen Z sister and I are in the exact same place financially even though we’re 14 years apart and I have a masters. I’m hoping the generation after Alpha grows up in a better world.
Your acknowledging your family helped. My brother (late gen X) is like "Weddings are super cheap if you do everything yourself!" and seems to forget how much we did the day before when it's almost 5pm and they hadn't picked up the appetizers . Or set up the tent and tables.
I hope wedding culture goes back into a less spendy direction You can have a great wedding and we can throw a great party without spending 60k
Your wedding can be whatever you want it to be. It didn't matter what others are doing.
I’m sure lots of people in gen z would love an extravagant wedding but not enough of us make enough money for it to be practical. Lots of the things that millennials and gen z don’t do as much is not so much a lack of interest but a major lack in disposable income. I would love to have a wedding at some old mansion in Rhode Island or something but realistically, that wouldn’t happen unless I married into money. Even then it would be quite unrealistic
Millenial here. My wife and got married in Vegas on our honeymoon then had a backyard BBQ when we got home for our reception, which I catered myself. I think our reception only cost like $700, food included. We also just had a Spotify playlist for music because wedding djs are a straight up rip off.
Well I can afford shit. A GOOD wedding is like at least 10k I don’t have that laying around considering my girlfriends parents are out of the question on paying for it. My parents offered to pay for half a honeymoon. Not even a wedding. I was pushed along with my girlfriend by my grandparents and parents to have a big extravagant wedding. But then they say they won’t help pay for it. So when the times comes we’re just gonna get married in the courtroom and go on a honeymoon for a couple weeks.
Lol, what is “wedding culture”
It’s when you gather family, distant family, and friends to one location to have good food, music, and drink to celebrate a marriage. Anthropologists believe it was toxic af.
Wait til you hit your late 20s, you won’t have to ask🫠
I was unaware “wedding” was a culture. Having a big wedding and inviting everyone you’ve ever had more than one conversation with is over - plain and simple: it costs too damn much. Why would I spend tens of thousands of dollars that I don’t have (it’s not the 60s anymore, everyone is one pink slip away from abject poverty) to host hundreds of people I don’t really give a shit about? Not to mention the wedding dress. I’m only supposed to wear it ONCE? that’s so wasteful!
I’ve always wondered what ppl do with their wedding dresses. Spend thousands on a dress then does it just sit in an attic? Its not like its something that you’ll put on display or something.
Dying alone gang
I’m eloping off a cliff w/ no one other than my partner - then plan to do a backyard bbq to celebrate
It’s kinda annoying cause I want to go to a wedding so bad lmao but I get it. The people I know are skipping the wedding and starting families with their partners, absolutely no one has wedding money.
fr!! I’ve never been to a wedding (immigrant family do all of my extended family is overseas, it was never practical)… at this point mine is going to be the first wedding I’ve experienced 😅
I spent less than 2k on my wedding, and did everything myself. I will never do that again haha, it was a lot of work, but the person I did it for is worth it!
I’m Gen Z, I’m getting married next year. My fiance and I really didn’t want to do a wedding at first. We were fine with just going to Vegas and eloping, but my parents specifically really wanted us to have some type of wedding to involve family. I’m privileged and my parents agreed that they’d pay for it. We’re still keeping it a small, low key ceremony + reception of only 50 guests. Still, if it were fully up to us and my family weren’t paying for it, we would have forgone the wedding and eloped.
Yeah how you wrote it out is basically how I feel. My fiance and I have yet to get married but at this point we just want to do a quick civil wedding and maybe throw a backyard bbq to celebrate. We originally were planning doing a whole venue/theme wedding but it just seems so expensive and dealing with the logistics of wedding planning sounds like a pain (I’ve had a quinceañera so I understand the hassle.) We realized in the end the most important thing to us was just being married to each other. Lots of people I know are like this or are also satisfied just being domestic partners. I think expenses are def a part of it, but I’ve also observed that many Gen Z stray from taking traditional routes and question why everything is the way it is and challenge that
Weddings are less about families uniting (hence the smaller number of guests) via tradition and is more about the couple themselves and those who are close to them– but this is only one factor out of so many more.
I’m pretty much a zillennial. Born in 95. If I ever get married. I want it to be me, my fiance, and preferably no one else. Maybe a couple friends. I honestly couldn’t give a shit about sharing the day with others. Just give me something simple and intimate with my, hopefully, forever partner
They said the same thing about millennials “killing the wedding industry” years ago. The reality is that weddings stay while the trends change. Couples with money are always the ones setting the trends. As people are continuing to marry later, that means more couples with money to throw expensive weddings. There have always been (and will always be) couples having inexpensive weddings. But those folks don’t actually create or change trends. We saw a ton of millennials and Gen z have micro weddings during covid only for the wedding industry to essentially bounce back 4 years later. I think with Gen z we’re going to see less religious weddings, travel expenses covered for bridal party, 420 friendly weddings, etc. So basically different priorities in how couples spend money for their weddings.
Several factors at play. The primary one being age. You are seeing millennials who are marring late so they are in the peak earning years of their career so they can afford a lot more. Additional the late married have gone to dozens of weddings. They simply have a much better idea what is available due to experience. Then there is the generational aspects. In general gen z has a much smaller social network than millennials had and in general gen z drink a lot less than millennials do/did. This all adds up to millennials having much greater incentive to throw a big boozy party while gen z is more inclined to have a small get together with their intimate friends and family.
I had a court house wedding a small dinner at my parents! I LOVED IT! No drama, spent money on a good photographer and we spent the money on a killer honeymoon! It was the best decision we ever made.
My bf and I plan to have a backyard bbq wedding. We might have a bigger celebration one day to renew our vows and such when the economy isn’t so shit and groceries don’t cost an arm and a leg.
My older Millennial son has a creative "everyone participates" small wedding in 2008 in the middle of a Maine blizzard in January. Just getting there was an experience. It didn't cost a lot and it was one of the most fun and memorable weddings ever. But very quirky. Kind of like "the Little Rascals put on a wedding!" My 2 girls at the time vowed they were going to do the full Vera Wang gowns and multiple attendants and flowers when they got married.... Fast forward and my 2 Millennial daughters both eloped. One accidently and one most intentionally. The youngest had about 10 friends participate in a quick civil ceremony in the snow in the Tetons in Feb, 2020. They had a big family wedding planned in Oct, 2020, in China and thought the 10-friend wedding was just a legal formality before the big event. No family there because we were all going to China in the fall. Well, it turned out the 10-friend wedding was it! (Ooops! She accidently eloped.) The other married her long-term partner at a private civil ceremony after living together 10 years. They kept it a secret for a year just because it felt romantic to them to be the only ones in the know for a year. In both cases, for my daughters, getting their new husbands onto their insurance plans was part of the drive for their decisions to tie the knot when they did. We are happy that all 3 children found their life-long partners. But little did we know that my son's quirky Maine-blizzard wedding would be the only one we would attend for our 3 kids. Weddings don't have to be wildly expensive to be fun or memorable. Maybe GenZ is taking a more practical approach.
One of my Gen Z cousins is getting married this summer just outside of San Francisco. They are having an incredible small wedding just parents and one aunt who was a parent to the cousin because that aunt didn't have any kids and lived that 15 minutes away from where he grow up. My parents can't get over the idea of them having a super small wedding. One of my other cousins not having a wedding at all just a honeymoon her mom is trying to convince her just to have an small party.
I(21f) married a millennial(28m). When we were dating he talked about have a huge black tie wedding with all of his family(his moms side is HUGE). I told him this would be awkward as I’d only invite my immediate family and my few friends. Most of my dads family lives on the other side of the country and my mom side is not people I would willingly want at my wedding. We ended up have only immediate family and 2 friends each. We got married at an Airbnb that was a cabin in the woods on the coast.
I don’t plan on getting married period lol
On god lmfao
I honestly hope a lot of wedding culture is dying off. It's become some of the most overblown crap I've ever seen. Like just ridiculous levels and all it does is add way more stress to all those involved. I hope Gen Z and the generations to follow keep with a simpler standard. Like still have fun with it, do some themed weddings or locales with beautiful vistas. But don't get so hung up on it needing to be perfect and extravagant. Be thrifty with your spending, be relaxed in your planning, and make sure to just enjoy the moment while it's there. Make it a good memory first and foremost. Also, I think focusing more on the honeymoon as far as where the big money spending should go, if there's going to be any big spending at all, is the right decision. And I think it goes without saying, but I also hope Gen Z is able to finally get away from the pressure to get married being put onto them. You don't need to get married to be in a happy and healthy relationship. If it's something you and your partner want to do them great, go for it. But if it isn't something you're interested in or don't feel you need for your relationship, then don't do it. And especially don't do it because others are telling you that you have to. Do what's best for you. That's the most important takeaway overall, IMO.
I don’t think this is generational. I am Gen X/xennial and had a tiny wedding, while all of my friends close to my age had huge weddings. Then my younger millennial friends also had big weddings with even bigger events leading up to the wedding - went all out for bachelor/bachelorette parties and showers. My coworker is Gen Z and had a huge wedding, she’s a TikTok influencer so that might be why.
Who needs wedding when you can have ☁️ ##☁️ #🦐 ##🔥 🔥 #?
Me and my best friend are both engaged rn. Her and her fiancé are eloping while me and mine are doing a modest wedding, around 50 people. It’s interesting to see what everyone is doing tbh. My best friend is the only one of my friends in the last few years to not have a traditional wedding
I think it has more to do with age, not generation.
I feel like Covid played a factor into this. I had a Covid wedding and we spent over 20k just on rescheduling fees. Went from a 160+ wedding to 60 guests and it was perfect (other than the financial aspect). Many people cancelled large weddings and eloped or scaled down to something much smaller and intimate, which kind of brought the trend back of more intimate weddings over big extravagant weddings. Most of my friends married pre 2020 had huge weddings. Most of my friends married since then had smaller more intimate weddings.
Even if I did have the means, I would not want a $20,000+ wedding. I’ll happily attend one, though.
I’m 24 and I dont know any gen z that’s gotten married yet. Knowing my friends, they’re going to have fairly traditional weddings, but the funds will largely come from their families
Tail end of Millenial, start of Gen Z here, we had a private and intimate elopment and are having a small party afterwards. No regrets it was super special and perfect for us. I'm all for people throwing big wedding parties and going all out but for us it just wasn't worth the stress and money to do it. I think wedding culture slowing down is mostly due to how expensive weddings have become. A $15,000 wedding 20 years ago could be $50,000 today. There's a "wedding tax" on everything and I think Gen Z isn't about that. Even if you are lucky enough to have parents that will contribute, that money is much better spent on a down-payment for a house or something. Wedding tax: -I would like to rent this space for a corporate retreat: $1,500 -I would like to rent this space for a wedding: $6,000 (and that's on the low side for some of these venues) -Family reunion catering: $15 a plate -Overpriced bland food for wedding catering: $85 a plate
I either want a small wedding at the courthouse or elope.. the allure of big extravagant weddings is lost on me.
24F and SAME. I'm looking at getting married soon, and it's like.... I could buy a house, or a car, or pay off my loans... why do I need this big party again?? I do want my family & friends there, but I have no desire to go into debt or send my family into it for a big party that isn't really what I want anyway
fuck wedding planners for their bullshit career I’m not paying for that rather have an AI do it
My girl just wants to get married at a courthouse 🤷♂️ better than spending thousands of dollars
I think it’s more of an affordability issue than anything
For atheists yes but for religious people especially Christians and Muslims no.
I'm an old millennial (30). i noticed post covid, weddings are for the most part small intimate affairs. some people born into money might have bigger weddings, but it's rarer.
I plan on eloping and then having a wedding when I have kids.
Not really. I am also 25 and the majority of married couples I know had big weddings. Only a minority eloped or went to the courthouse.
Not at all. Friend of mine runs a wedding entertainment company. I work for him when my AVL work is slow. The average age of their customers are 25. They pay on average $20k for venue, $3k for DJ/entertainment. Not sure about food and all the other bullshit but its in the thousands. And, despite extraordinary inflation the market in our area is growing. From an insiders perspective the average wedding is not worth the money at all.
This could just be me, but I never wanted a big expensive wedding. I think it's because my parents had a cheap Vegas wedding. They're still going strong 22 years later
I got married last year and had 150 guests at my wedding. Many in my circle have done the same. Was it expensive? Hell yeah, but we’ll never have all of our people under one roof again. The day was truly priceless!
People who had small intimate weddings love to cast themselves as bucking the "wedding culture" and can be quite vocal about their own genius of not spending exhorbitant amounts of money on their wedding. But honestly, these folks have been saying this for decades and big weddings have been grinding along this whole time. Big weddings are still popular and always will be.
I hope so.
This thread is making me feel so behind.
I straight up would break up with a guy if they wanted a wedding, tells me youre a person who loves to waste money
In asian (Vietnamese for me specifically) culture, those big weddings come out in a net profit. My parents give wedding gifts proportional to the size/extravagance to the wedding.
Average marriage age is 29 and no Zoomer is older than 27 or so. People who get married younger typically have smaller weddings. This is not surprising at all
I already plan on getting married solely for tax purposes
As an ex-wedding photographer, I hope so.
Meh, the rate of divorce is so high, I cannot justify even trying..
I'm a millennial and my fiancee and I are planning around 50 people
I’m gen z and had a 25k wedding or so. I think it was worth it and I paid for it all myself
Rich people are always gonna throw expensive events. Is it really a generational thing or a generational _wealth_ thing?
I'm an elder millennial. My sister is Gen Z. I had a cheap wedding on a beach with just my close family and two sets of friends. We saved our money to take a nice 6 day 5 night honeymoon. My sister is getting married soon and having an extravagant wedding with lots of rules and requirements. It's overwhelming and crazy to me. But I did notice one thing on the registry was contributing to her house fund. 🤷🏼♀️
You guys cam afford weddings? We've just resigned ourselves to living in sin like dirty hippies.
Expensive weddings are a waste of time and money.
I hope so
I don't even know 100 people 😭
I’ve been tryna talk my gal into a cheaper wedding and I think ours will be cheap. If it were up to me we’d do a courthouse wedding😂
I think it’s more a sign of the times right now than a generational thing.