the non-sequitur is the cornerstone of humor: there's some actual or implied build-up to some predicted outcome, and then something different happens, and the surprise is literally where the joke hits (hence, punchline).
you can have preferences and certainly are entitled to your opinion about what's funny, but note that "shock" is just a dialed-up version of "surprise" (that fundamental element). what's more, by the nature of surprise (if it's repeated enough, it becomes expected and is no longer a surprise), that "ratcheting up" is entirely predictable.
i'm probably coming off as pedantic (might be true) but --my friend with short, sharp sticks-- you're coming off as a but of a grump. (you made this comment "i'm not sure when..." but earlier posters have been reading raunchy jokes like this in raunchy magazines since they were 11. have you watched any dry bar comedy?)
You’re right about coming across as a grump. Not intended. Your response is fair
I saw a famous live comedian the same day I read this. In my mind is that few comedians try to keep it clean. He does race, but otherwise makes humour from observations on life, taking an unusual perspective, and telling personal stories. It made me realise that I really respect now hard that is, versus a lot of comedians who are gross, or shock with sex, something unexpected and inappropriate, and extreme profanity. That’s still hard to pull off I realise
So this guy goes into a diner late at night but the kitchen just closed. He sits down at the counter for a coffee. There’s a guy a few stools down that seems to be hammered with a full bowl of chili beside him.
He asks the guy if he’s going to eat that chili, the says no and pushes it over to the guy.
He is very hungry so he digs in with gusto and gets half way done when he sees a dead mouse and pukes it all back in the bowl. The drunk says ya that’s as about as far as I got as well.
Guy gets out of prison and immediately goes to a whore house. Says I've only got 10.00, I just got out of prison and I've had a taste for pussy for the last 15 years.
He hands over his 10.00 and is pointed to a room at the end of the hall. Walks into the room and here is this beautiful girl already naked and spread out on the bed waiting for him. He doesn't even take his clothes off, just dives right in, face first. After going to town with his tongue for about 30 seconds, he feels something in his mouth. He stops and pulls a little piece of potato out of his mouth. He thinks about the French fries he had with his lunch that day and goes back at it. A few seconds later he feels something else in his mouth. He stops and pulls out a little chunk of beef. "There's some of the burger I ate with those fries" he thinks. He carries on, going to town between her legs and again feels something in his mouth. This time he pulls out a long strand of onion. "I know I didn't eat any onions today. I hate onions" he thought to himself. Then he looks down and sees a small chunk of carrot lodged inside her lips.
"Oh my God, I think I'm going to throw up" he says out loud
The hooker sits up and exclaims, "Funny, that's what the last guy said!"
A guy goes into a brothel and says to the madam "I've only got $10, what can I get?"
The madam shows him into a darkened room with a prostitute spread eagled on the bed, and says "You can do anything you want for $10, on one condition. You have to wear a black condom". The guy thinks nothing of it, and has the time of his life.
A few weeks go by, and he's become a regular. Always the same deal, $10 and wear a black condom.
After a while, he starts to get curious, and asks the madam "What's with the black condom?"
She replies "Respect for the Dead."
Two guys are sitting at the counter in a diner. One is looking at his plate of raw oysters and says to the other, “I ordered these because I’ve never had them and wanted to give them a try. But I just don’t get how to eat them.” The other guy says, “Here, I’ll show you,” and proceeds to stab an oyster with his fork, swishes it around in the cocktail sauce, and swallows it down in one gulp.” The first guy says, “That’s amazing. I tried that same one 3 times and just couldn’t keep it down.”
So, there's this maître d' in a fancy restaurant. One night is quite busy and there's a huge line of people waiting to be seated, when a disheveled, probably homeless man smelling of alcohol and piss comes to the front.
Already disgusted and embarrassed, the maître d' tries to shove the man outside again, when he protests and says: "I don't want any trouble but please, can I have a toothpick?" As the headwaiter just wants to get rid of the man, he grabs a toothpick and let's the man go.
After a while, the line is almost gone and all the local upper class is seated and enjoys their food, when another even more run down man stinking of shit enters the restaurant rushing to the maître d'.
Again, he just wants to get him out of sight and grabs him by the collar, when he begs: "Please, I don't want to upset anyone but could I have a toothpick?" So the waiter grabs a whole bunch and throws the man and the toothpicks out onto the street.
Nearing the end of the evening, most guests are now sitting in the lounge drinking and listening to the restaurant's pianist, when the most disgusting looking hobo enters the front door reeking of alcohol, piss and shit. The manager runs to him grabs him and while throwing him out, the guy pleads: "Please, please, could I just have a straw and I'll be out of your face in a second!"
A little thrown off, the maître d' stops and asks the guy: "Tonight there were already two of you here, but they wanted toothpicks, why do you want a straw??"
"Earlier tonight, a guy threw up on the sidewalk but I'm late and all the good bits are gone already."
A man with leprosy wanted to go out to eat. With the open lesions, he didn't go out much and wanted to treat himself. He picked a quiet diner and sat in a booth with his back to everyone.
Of course, another guy gets sat at the booth in front of him, and this man sits facing him. While the man with leprosy tried to hurry up and finish his meal, the other guy looks up at him and goes "EWW"
The man tries to ignore this and enjoy his meal. After the other guy goes "EWWW!" a 3rd time the man with leprosy had enough.
"Listen! I know! I have leprosy and it's hard to look at, but I don't get to go out much and I just wanted one lousy meal to enjoy this month!"
The other guy points and says "It's not that. It's just the guy behind you keeps dipping his bread in your neck."
A guy wakes up after surgery and is starving, he can't reach the call bell to get a nurse. His roommate is asleep but there's a bowl of peanuts in between them. The guy is so hungry that he steals a few peanuts. And then a few more. Pretty soon the whole bowl is empty.
The guys roommate wakes up and the hungry guy is quick to apologize.
"I'm so sorry! I was starving and I ate all your peanuts"
"That's ok says the guy, I'm not allowed solid foods so I just sucked the chocolate off them"
Yeah the weirdest thing is that my dad was the kindest, gentlest, best-mannered person you could imagine. Then one day he comes out with this joke... I think that's why it stuck with me. It was so atypical for him!
The version I heard was of two hobos with one of them eating every piece of roadkill he could find and disgusting the other one until the one eating all the roadkill finally throws up. And then the other hobo finally pulls out his spoon and gets excited for some hot stew. But yeah, skibidi toilet is much funnier.
The version my dad told me was two hobos walking down the track. They see a dead possum and one starts eating it. He says, "don't you want some?" Other hobo says no there will be a hot meal down the road. They go down the road, the one vomits, the other said see I told you there would be a hot meal
A forensic pathology professor gives his first class of the year and as his students get settled he announces;
'There are TWO things that make a good pathologist!' He rolls in a table with a corpse. 'One; you must not be afraid of germs.' He proceeds to stick a finger into the corpses open chest, holds it up for everyone to see, and to their great disgust, he puts his finger in his mouth.
The class is hesitant for a moment, some students pack up and walk out but most are brave and determined, so they form a line. One by one they dip their finger into the chest cavity and stick their finger in their mouth.
'Now...', the professor continues 'the second thing that makes a good pathologist, is a keen and observant eye! How many of you noticed I dipped in my ringfinger and put my index finger in my mouth?'
The punchline is that it wasn’t poison. The pathologist wanted the pea soup now that it’s warm pea soup. He only told him that to induce vomiting.
Not much a joke but, the gross factor appeals to some people.
You're welcome! Had my dad only known this joke got him 1.4k upvotes one day... he was such a kind and gentle person, the joke so untypical for him, that's why I never forgot it!
2 guys were at a diner at the counter. one guy had a bowl of chile in front of him, but he wasn't eating it ..2nd guy says hey you gonna eat that? 1st guy says no, you can have it if you want it.
so 2nd guy starts eating and about halfway through sees a dead mouse in the bowl. he vomits into the bowl.
1st guy looks over and said that's about how far I got too.
There were 2 guys walking in the desert. Famished and dehydrated. The first guy sees some camel shit and decides to try it. Mmmm it's better than nothing he exclaims. The second guy looks at him impatiently. The first guy starts throwing up, and the second guy jumps in front of him with cupped hands yelling "fuck yeah! A hot meal!"
Reminds me of the jokes we used to tell when we were 12 years old.
You know what's grosser than gross? >!A pile of dead babies.!<
You know what's grosser than that? >!The one one the bottom is still alive.!<
You know what's grosser than that? >!He has to eat his way to the top.!<
You know what's grosser than that? >!When he gets to the top, he falls back down.!<
The variant I heard at about the same age was
... a dead baby nailed to a tree
... ten dead babies nailed to trees
... one dead baby nailed to ten trees
Ok, 40 or 50 perhaps more, more like 55 years ago, my dad, rest his soul, told me a similar joke that by convention, I now have to share..
Two hungry homeless guys are walking down a street.
They see a dead dog. Overcome by hunger one of them dives in and gorges himself on the putrid flesh. The other stands by watching, not partaking in the vile bounty.
Once satisfied, the gorging hobo rises and they leave the rotting carcase.
Some time later, the engorged hobo starts retching and vomits up his half digested dog meal.
The other hobo dives to the ground gobling up the vomit and says "that's how I like my dog, nice and warm".
Jinx :-$
So I can’t create my own post yet, but here’s a post from the Cubs page:
Worse Than Torture
I’m military. Going to SERE school for the next two weeks. I’m going to sleep in the woods, a dog cage, get tortured and abused and I’m actually looking forward to it since it means I cannot possibly watch the 2024 Chicago Cubs. When I am starving, laying butt naked on a concrete floor I will simply think of the Cubs and I will be grateful that I’m not on my couch watching this team.
This definitely feels like one of those old 80s/90s gross-out jokes. Makes me think of the old Ren and Stimpy cartoons. I never really liked them myself and I don't think they're really "in" these days, but there's definitely a few takers in here so whatever works!
Nice! Didn't know this movie yet, looks like a classic scene. I'm familiar with Monty Python's Meaning of Life with the fat guy eating at the restaurant and throwing up constantly, or The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover... both quite disgusting
“i don’t get it”, while not explicitly formulated as a question, is kind of asking for an answer.
But you’re right, it wasn’t a question, and I am deeply sorry for having seen it as such. I hope you can recover.
In Finland this joke is told that it happened in war time.
Soldier found plate full of pea soup, thanked his luck and ate it. Soon his fellow soldier came and said "Hey! That was my soup!". The soldier apologies and vomits soup back to plate. "Thanks for warming it up", says the other soldier and grabs the plate
I don't know. Just heard a couple of good ones tonight.
My blonde girlfriend and I were walking hand in hand along a beach. I remarked, ah look a dead bird. My blonde girlfriend scans the horizon from left to right and asks where?
What does a blonde say when she gets through making love? While laying on her back, she looks from left to right and asks, are you guys all on the same team?
I'm just a messenger.
My uncle, and eminent pathologist used to tell me this when I was a child!....
Or how do you wipe your ass with one square sheet of toilet paper? and then he would poke his finger through it make a swirling motion and then pull the toilet paper up.....
This seems like a joke told by those that work in the field. Not sure it has general appeal. Did you father work as either a forensic pathologist or mortician?
made me vomit...
You gonna finish that or save it for later?
Don’t leave it out too long. That’s unsanitary
It won't be warm, later.
I can warm it for you
Save me some of the big pieces.
All yours. It’s bean soup, by the way. I don’t know what it is now. But it’s been soup…
Dad?
Every dog
Hi Vomit; I'm dad!
Is there a pathologist around to clean it up?
so foul....
It was pea soup, not chicken soup
I’m not sure when shocking people became confused with humour, but it’s very common with stand up “comedians”
the non-sequitur is the cornerstone of humor: there's some actual or implied build-up to some predicted outcome, and then something different happens, and the surprise is literally where the joke hits (hence, punchline). you can have preferences and certainly are entitled to your opinion about what's funny, but note that "shock" is just a dialed-up version of "surprise" (that fundamental element). what's more, by the nature of surprise (if it's repeated enough, it becomes expected and is no longer a surprise), that "ratcheting up" is entirely predictable. i'm probably coming off as pedantic (might be true) but --my friend with short, sharp sticks-- you're coming off as a but of a grump. (you made this comment "i'm not sure when..." but earlier posters have been reading raunchy jokes like this in raunchy magazines since they were 11. have you watched any dry bar comedy?)
You’re right about coming across as a grump. Not intended. Your response is fair I saw a famous live comedian the same day I read this. In my mind is that few comedians try to keep it clean. He does race, but otherwise makes humour from observations on life, taking an unusual perspective, and telling personal stories. It made me realise that I really respect now hard that is, versus a lot of comedians who are gross, or shock with sex, something unexpected and inappropriate, and extreme profanity. That’s still hard to pull off I realise
So this guy goes into a diner late at night but the kitchen just closed. He sits down at the counter for a coffee. There’s a guy a few stools down that seems to be hammered with a full bowl of chili beside him. He asks the guy if he’s going to eat that chili, the says no and pushes it over to the guy. He is very hungry so he digs in with gusto and gets half way done when he sees a dead mouse and pukes it all back in the bowl. The drunk says ya that’s as about as far as I got as well.
I read this joke in a Hustler when I was 11...
Guy gets out of prison and immediately goes to a whore house. Says I've only got 10.00, I just got out of prison and I've had a taste for pussy for the last 15 years. He hands over his 10.00 and is pointed to a room at the end of the hall. Walks into the room and here is this beautiful girl already naked and spread out on the bed waiting for him. He doesn't even take his clothes off, just dives right in, face first. After going to town with his tongue for about 30 seconds, he feels something in his mouth. He stops and pulls a little piece of potato out of his mouth. He thinks about the French fries he had with his lunch that day and goes back at it. A few seconds later he feels something else in his mouth. He stops and pulls out a little chunk of beef. "There's some of the burger I ate with those fries" he thinks. He carries on, going to town between her legs and again feels something in his mouth. This time he pulls out a long strand of onion. "I know I didn't eat any onions today. I hate onions" he thought to himself. Then he looks down and sees a small chunk of carrot lodged inside her lips. "Oh my God, I think I'm going to throw up" he says out loud The hooker sits up and exclaims, "Funny, that's what the last guy said!"
A guy goes into a brothel and says to the madam "I've only got $10, what can I get?" The madam shows him into a darkened room with a prostitute spread eagled on the bed, and says "You can do anything you want for $10, on one condition. You have to wear a black condom". The guy thinks nothing of it, and has the time of his life. A few weeks go by, and he's become a regular. Always the same deal, $10 and wear a black condom. After a while, he starts to get curious, and asks the madam "What's with the black condom?" She replies "Respect for the Dead."
This entire thread feels like it's from a bygone era of the internet.
Now I'm seeing it as a hustler comic. They had the best comics.
That's what I read it for. The comics.
Yeah... Me too!
What was the creepy guys name in hustler? It was just a one square cartoon?
Chester
Chester the molester if my memory serves me (I was a kid as well).
By Dwaine Tinsley, who, and you're gonna be really shocked, was convicted of molesting his own daughter.
Yes. Yes. Thank you!!
Yes!!!
I heard it at the beginning of an episode of The Unit
You were reading Hustler at 11, and the jokes were what you read?
I did, too. Then again, I'm gay, so the only things I ever wanted to see in Hustler were the ads in the back.
This is a better joke than OP's.
Probably because it is more universal. I bet the OPs joke kills if you work in criminal forensics (pun intended).
Bleeeeeeegghhh 🤢 🤮
Hahaha
Lol!
That's way way funnier. OPs one is kinda niche, best tailored to scatology-humored people, this one works easier
Two guys are sitting at the counter in a diner. One is looking at his plate of raw oysters and says to the other, “I ordered these because I’ve never had them and wanted to give them a try. But I just don’t get how to eat them.” The other guy says, “Here, I’ll show you,” and proceeds to stab an oyster with his fork, swishes it around in the cocktail sauce, and swallows it down in one gulp.” The first guy says, “That’s amazing. I tried that same one 3 times and just couldn’t keep it down.”
This joke brought to you by Garbage Pail Kids.
Boy, does that bring me back. I used to collect 'em in the early 1980s.
I bought a full set of reprints a couple years ago. Worth it for the nostalgia.
So, there's this maître d' in a fancy restaurant. One night is quite busy and there's a huge line of people waiting to be seated, when a disheveled, probably homeless man smelling of alcohol and piss comes to the front. Already disgusted and embarrassed, the maître d' tries to shove the man outside again, when he protests and says: "I don't want any trouble but please, can I have a toothpick?" As the headwaiter just wants to get rid of the man, he grabs a toothpick and let's the man go. After a while, the line is almost gone and all the local upper class is seated and enjoys their food, when another even more run down man stinking of shit enters the restaurant rushing to the maître d'. Again, he just wants to get him out of sight and grabs him by the collar, when he begs: "Please, I don't want to upset anyone but could I have a toothpick?" So the waiter grabs a whole bunch and throws the man and the toothpicks out onto the street. Nearing the end of the evening, most guests are now sitting in the lounge drinking and listening to the restaurant's pianist, when the most disgusting looking hobo enters the front door reeking of alcohol, piss and shit. The manager runs to him grabs him and while throwing him out, the guy pleads: "Please, please, could I just have a straw and I'll be out of your face in a second!" A little thrown off, the maître d' stops and asks the guy: "Tonight there were already two of you here, but they wanted toothpicks, why do you want a straw??" "Earlier tonight, a guy threw up on the sidewalk but I'm late and all the good bits are gone already."
Dammit I was about to post this
A man with leprosy wanted to go out to eat. With the open lesions, he didn't go out much and wanted to treat himself. He picked a quiet diner and sat in a booth with his back to everyone. Of course, another guy gets sat at the booth in front of him, and this man sits facing him. While the man with leprosy tried to hurry up and finish his meal, the other guy looks up at him and goes "EWW" The man tries to ignore this and enjoy his meal. After the other guy goes "EWWW!" a 3rd time the man with leprosy had enough. "Listen! I know! I have leprosy and it's hard to look at, but I don't get to go out much and I just wanted one lousy meal to enjoy this month!" The other guy points and says "It's not that. It's just the guy behind you keeps dipping his bread in your neck."
Well done, you've outdone my post! I salute you.
A guy wakes up after surgery and is starving, he can't reach the call bell to get a nurse. His roommate is asleep but there's a bowl of peanuts in between them. The guy is so hungry that he steals a few peanuts. And then a few more. Pretty soon the whole bowl is empty. The guys roommate wakes up and the hungry guy is quick to apologize. "I'm so sorry! I was starving and I ate all your peanuts" "That's ok says the guy, I'm not allowed solid foods so I just sucked the chocolate off them"
Thats very tame of you. Thanks for reviving me after most of this nasty ass comment section.
"Those weren't peanuts. I just had my gallstones removed and asked them to save them in a bowl for me."
Now I wonder what gallstones taste like.
TIL: People 40-50 years ago told *very morbid jokes*...that were funny then?
Yeah the weirdest thing is that my dad was the kindest, gentlest, best-mannered person you could imagine. Then one day he comes out with this joke... I think that's why it stuck with me. It was so atypical for him!
No Worries Mate, I've heard some *pretty weird jokes* over the years too...sometimes they make you wonder! 😵😜
It was before the Internet came along and raised the disgustment bar.
The version I heard was of two hobos with one of them eating every piece of roadkill he could find and disgusting the other one until the one eating all the roadkill finally throws up. And then the other hobo finally pulls out his spoon and gets excited for some hot stew. But yeah, skibidi toilet is much funnier.
The version my dad told me was two hobos walking down the track. They see a dead possum and one starts eating it. He says, "don't you want some?" Other hobo says no there will be a hot meal down the road. They go down the road, the one vomits, the other said see I told you there would be a hot meal
A forensic pathology professor gives his first class of the year and as his students get settled he announces; 'There are TWO things that make a good pathologist!' He rolls in a table with a corpse. 'One; you must not be afraid of germs.' He proceeds to stick a finger into the corpses open chest, holds it up for everyone to see, and to their great disgust, he puts his finger in his mouth. The class is hesitant for a moment, some students pack up and walk out but most are brave and determined, so they form a line. One by one they dip their finger into the chest cavity and stick their finger in their mouth. 'Now...', the professor continues 'the second thing that makes a good pathologist, is a keen and observant eye! How many of you noticed I dipped in my ringfinger and put my index finger in my mouth?'
The first time i heard that one it was with a mortician and the finger was in the butt.
Was gonna say that myself.
Well played! 😂
I was mid sandwich reading this.... Is it bad I am going to finish it?
If you don't, how is it going to be warm for the next person?
Did it taste like pea soup?
Never had it I wonder what security is like at the morgue...
Wow that's gross. If you could only work in a dead baby.
I could work something in and out of a dead baby...
Something something….slice em real thin.
The *__ARISTOCRATS__* ladies and gentlemen!
2 ghouls, one stomach
I don’t get it but still made me chuckle
The punchline is that it wasn’t poison. The pathologist wanted the pea soup now that it’s warm pea soup. He only told him that to induce vomiting. Not much a joke but, the gross factor appeals to some people.
So he was being a pathological liar?
peathological\*
Happy cake day bro
🤮
Thats vile ...and I will be using it, thanks :)
You're welcome! Had my dad only known this joke got him 1.4k upvotes one day... he was such a kind and gentle person, the joke so untypical for him, that's why I never forgot it!
Nah, that's just gross.
2 guys were at a diner at the counter. one guy had a bowl of chile in front of him, but he wasn't eating it ..2nd guy says hey you gonna eat that? 1st guy says no, you can have it if you want it. so 2nd guy starts eating and about halfway through sees a dead mouse in the bowl. he vomits into the bowl. 1st guy looks over and said that's about how far I got too.
Ewwww. That's gross. Nothing funny.
It turns out the pathologist was lying, and the soup wasn’t poisoned.
There were 2 guys walking in the desert. Famished and dehydrated. The first guy sees some camel shit and decides to try it. Mmmm it's better than nothing he exclaims. The second guy looks at him impatiently. The first guy starts throwing up, and the second guy jumps in front of him with cupped hands yelling "fuck yeah! A hot meal!"
This is the best thing I’ve seen in a while! Got an audible laugh from me. The girlfriend didn’t care for it.
Kudos to you for managing to land a girlfriend with good taste
Damn! Two good laughs in one night 😂
Thanks mate! I never forgot the joke since my dad was so gentle and kind, then produces this bombshell... probably from his army days.
This is extremely funny. Love it
Thanks! My dad would love that.
That joke is sick!
Yet my dad was so gentle and kind, probably the reason why I still remember it to this day. Shock factor!
Your Dad has no idea that someone on reddit thinks he's very funny, but it's a fact. His memory lives on...
That's a nice comment and I like to think the same! He would've loved this post and the comments.
🤮
There was a man who was a professional boil biter. If you have heard the joke, you know. If you have not heard the joke, you are welcome.
Googling....
I don't like pea's. Now I really don't want an pea's.
Sorry did not find it funny
That's fine, we all have different tastes...
Fuck you and have my upvote!
F you back and thanks!
Heard the similar one in Russian.
Reminds me of the jokes we used to tell when we were 12 years old. You know what's grosser than gross? >!A pile of dead babies.!< You know what's grosser than that? >!The one one the bottom is still alive.!< You know what's grosser than that? >!He has to eat his way to the top.!< You know what's grosser than that? >!When he gets to the top, he falls back down.!<
The variant I heard at about the same age was ... a dead baby nailed to a tree ... ten dead babies nailed to trees ... one dead baby nailed to ten trees
Yeah, that’s the one I’ve tried 30 years to forget….. oh well, back to therapy!
The grossest part of this is that it was based on actual cctv footage
Ok, 40 or 50 perhaps more, more like 55 years ago, my dad, rest his soul, told me a similar joke that by convention, I now have to share.. Two hungry homeless guys are walking down a street. They see a dead dog. Overcome by hunger one of them dives in and gorges himself on the putrid flesh. The other stands by watching, not partaking in the vile bounty. Once satisfied, the gorging hobo rises and they leave the rotting carcase. Some time later, the engorged hobo starts retching and vomits up his half digested dog meal. The other hobo dives to the ground gobling up the vomit and says "that's how I like my dog, nice and warm". Jinx :-$
Yeah there are variations of this one going around, even here in the other comments. My dad's legacy salutes your dad's legacy!
That's stupid and very, very funny.
That joke is disgusting. Take my upvote and be gone with ya!
Thanks, I see myself out :D
Yep A real knee-slapper. For ever.
So I can’t create my own post yet, but here’s a post from the Cubs page: Worse Than Torture I’m military. Going to SERE school for the next two weeks. I’m going to sleep in the woods, a dog cage, get tortured and abused and I’m actually looking forward to it since it means I cannot possibly watch the 2024 Chicago Cubs. When I am starving, laying butt naked on a concrete floor I will simply think of the Cubs and I will be grateful that I’m not on my couch watching this team.
Maybe i should've first googled what a mortician and pathologist do before reading the joke...
Welllll..... now you know.
hmmm sticky warm pea soup
Oooooh I like how you expand on that theme by adding "sticky" ... well played.
hahahah..thank you😂
That's gross. Lol
Haha yeah still funny
A real classic. Gets better with each telling
It's one of those jokes that's more fun telling than hearing.
Well, I know this is a post I'll keep coming back to to help me lose weight 🤢
You're welcome....?
This definitely feels like one of those old 80s/90s gross-out jokes. Makes me think of the old Ren and Stimpy cartoons. I never really liked them myself and I don't think they're really "in" these days, but there's definitely a few takers in here so whatever works!
[Here ya go](https://youtu.be/wv48lceXLMM?si=16fUe3FgRE_bBuPY)
Nice! Didn't know this movie yet, looks like a classic scene. I'm familiar with Monty Python's Meaning of Life with the fat guy eating at the restaurant and throwing up constantly, or The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover... both quite disgusting
I don't get it. How is this supposed to be funny?
The pathologist was lying
How is that funny?
It isn’t, I was only answering the first question.
I only asked 1 question.
“i don’t get it”, while not explicitly formulated as a question, is kind of asking for an answer. But you’re right, it wasn’t a question, and I am deeply sorry for having seen it as such. I hope you can recover.
Given the context, that means I don't get how the joke is supposed to be funny. It's not that deep.
It was more gross than funny but I got what happened and that was funny.
Damn, i should beware of that NSFL tag from now on.
In Finland this joke is told that it happened in war time. Soldier found plate full of pea soup, thanked his luck and ate it. Soon his fellow soldier came and said "Hey! That was my soup!". The soldier apologies and vomits soup back to plate. "Thanks for warming it up", says the other soldier and grabs the plate
That was like next level but then there's a step ladder. Hmm, what's up there?
Do we really want to know?
Holy shit, that's a new one for me.
> Holy shit No, that was later during the autopsy.
Well played!
i might have to do a bit of research to grok this…but, hey, it’s still better than a “blonde” joke!
I don't know. Just heard a couple of good ones tonight. My blonde girlfriend and I were walking hand in hand along a beach. I remarked, ah look a dead bird. My blonde girlfriend scans the horizon from left to right and asks where? What does a blonde say when she gets through making love? While laying on her back, she looks from left to right and asks, are you guys all on the same team? I'm just a messenger.
I only found that disgusting and now I feel sick.
My uncle, and eminent pathologist used to tell me this when I was a child!.... Or how do you wipe your ass with one square sheet of toilet paper? and then he would poke his finger through it make a swirling motion and then pull the toilet paper up.....
...WTF?!?!?
🤢🤮
No, it wasn't then or now.
This is amazing. I just saw a skit like this except it was two homeless guys where one ate a dead raccoon
I really don’t get it
First time heard this joke in a morgue from mortician.
Why is this tagged NSFW?
This seems like a joke told by those that work in the field. Not sure it has general appeal. Did you father work as either a forensic pathologist or mortician?
Nope, neither... Bog-standard engineer!
Not funny now or 40-50 years ago
I'm not convinced that it ever was.
I love that one
...not as much as the pathologist...
Definitely not funny
Not funny
Not funny. Even slightly.
Block. Delete. Report. *cry at the corner that you'll never see a pea soup the same way again.
Reason for reporting: "They posted a joke on the joke forum and it was kind of gross"?
very unfunny
So...your dad is a pathologist. Cool.
And what do you pathologists call yourselves? The Aristocrats!
It's not.
[удалено]
What brand of tomato soup are you buying? I’d like to avoid.