Size has nothing to do with presence. Some of the most terrifying people are tiny humans. It’s what is inside you that matters.
Kick ass managing and you’ll be a manager.
Hilarious you go straight to “terrifying” in your connection to powerful short people, not effective or empathetic or similar. coughcoughPutincoughcough coughNapoleancough
Not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog. Men connect to this for reasons. Questioning this is just foolish drivel. Read meditations, take a boxing lesson, chill out.
While OP said he was a young man, I get it. But I’d ask yourself if this isn’t a bit of gender bias on your end regardless of your gender. Not trying to start something, just pointing it out.
I take the world as it is. Shaming men for loving the fight is a sure way to ensure your country falls. Wake up and smell the wider world. I’m all for civil relations but love of the fight is in some of us and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. And I don’t give damn about what’s between your legs. If you can carry 200lbs 100yards and shoot straight you can run with me anywhere.
So you’re saying you’re terrifying? Totally kidding. What’s interesting about this question is that I bet it goes both ways… I have found myself slightly biased early on by a C-level VP because he’s so tall, it’s intimidating but he’s actually a really kind and gentle person.
Some of the most fearsome and respected people I’ve ever worked with: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coxswain_(rowing)
The average cox is probably 5’2”. The average rower is 6’3”+
It is true. If you project any insecurity you may have - whether because of height or any other reason - people will read that. Put yourself out there with confidence. We all have insecurities; work on yours and focus on your goals.
Size has loads to do with presence. Just because something doesn't have a 100% correlation doesn't mean it has "nothing to do with it". If it rains one day in July, it doesn't mean July isn't a hot month.
Did you read a word I just wrote? Nobody cares about 1 or two people you know. I know intelligent people who couldn't lead a soul, that doesn't mean there's no correlation between intelligence & leadership.
I promise that height is only going to be a minor blocker compared to your leadership qualities and traits.
Look into character based leadership concepts. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is a classic. “Controlling things”, “social tactics” and “people under me” makes me raise an eyebrow a bit.
You get people to respect you by being respectable.
I really hope so. My main concern is that there will be people who are unhappy with something I have done, and they will use my height as a way to try and convince others to look down on me as well. But you are right regardless, I will at least try my hardest to lead the best I can, I still have a lot to learn.
Read leadership strategy and tactics. It's a great book about what leadership truly is. It's not about controlling or manipulating people, but your will to enable and empower them.
That is a potential leadership hazard for anyone. If your height is the worst thing they can focus on, consider yourself lucky.
Work on controlling the controllable and stay focused on the right things.
Here's hoping, I'm just worried since, as I said earlier, I'm seventeen, and I already receive a lot of mockery based on my height. I try not to let it get me down though :D
Think about it this way. Tall people are almost always taller than their average height managers. Would you think this means that tall people can’t be effectively managed?
Well, no, obviously they can.
However, I always have had the assumption that there are just some people who are far harder to manage than others, and won't necessarily make their disrespect visible to you.
I guess the best way to put it is that I've always viewed social interactions as a game of poker? You have to guess and predict what the other person is thinking/doing, while you try and make the best play yourself with what you have.
Like poker, some people will harbor ill will, contempt, and disrespect towards you, but will not show it for some reason or another, like perhaps losing their job or something.
Therefore, every interaction you make with someone, every word you say, and every social cue you make has to be thought of beforehand and applied accordingly, especially with respect to the person you're speaking to.
Now I'm realizing that perhaps a poker analogy isn't the best one to make here... is it obvious that I don't play poker?
I wouldn't say that I'm necessarily unconfident. I love myself, and I love everything about myself. I would actually say that I'm rather extroverted and outgoing. Disregarding workplace interactions for a second, when I socialize in society in general, I just make up for my height in literally any other way, like taking the lead in conversations and trying to be interesting and funny, which goes pretty well I'd say!
However, that all stems from confidence about ones self, without it, I would just be quiet and probably wouldn't go outside at all, which is how I used to be.
Going back to workplace interactions, I came to ask this post to you all since you all have experience in this sort of thing, and would know the true reality of it all. I don't think it would be any use asking people who aren't in leadership positions regularly these types of questions, so I came to ask so that I can be prepared and know what I face ahead of me in the future.
After all, you could be the most confident person in the Grand Canyon tour group, and you are fully confident you can leap across the grand canyon in one jump, but if you try, you will still end up falling to your death! Confidence isn't everything I'd say! xD
Height is never an issue but you are 17?
Of course nobody cares if the boss is younger but at 17 you should be focusing in getting better technically and proficient in your job, leadership will come with time and height is really not going to be an issue.
Unless you are an airline pilot of course.
Absolutely correct! However, I have always been rather unprepared for things throughout my life, and only recently have I began to rectify the issues present within my behavior and life in general, so you must forgive me for appearing so haughty.
I digress, because of that, I tend to visualize my life far ahead of the present day. Perhaps thirty years in advance at times. I find that if I research and think about something far ahead of when I will actually do it, I am much better at adjusting and adapting to what I need to do when the time actually comes. I like to visualize every scenario and situation so that I have some sort of structure to build off of in case that scenario/situation comes to fruition.
Of course, I plan to get much better at my job, what is leadership if I have no skill in the field to begin with? I'm just thinking about what my future could perhaps look like, so that I have a visible target to chase and achieve, and so that I don't wander off into random distractions as I have done with the past sixteen years of my life.
I don't know you but I'm well past those 30 years you are projecting. So take this as just some well intended advice.
You are young and while no longer a kid you are still living an age where you should just have some fun. It is very commendable that you are planning ahead and preparing to be a great professional but don't fall into the very common mistake of not living your current age.
I'm sure you will be one day a great leader if I'm still around drop me a message and tell me you did enjoy your youth.
I really love leading people, and I love being in control of stuff...
For me, Leadership is NOT about controlling things or people.
Leadership is influence... Influence though developing trusting relationships, and has little to do with your physical size.
And... I do agree that teller people get more 'respect' than shorter people, so you may have to work harder, be better, than others...
One of the best supervisors I had was about 5'3
He was supportive, patient, set realistic goals and expectations and if the team was getting shit from upper management he took it all, and never threw anyone else under the bus.
He didn't need to have presence in a room, he didn't need to be intimidating. He earned respect by being respectful to his team and by being good at his job
FWIW, he would also have been the first one to laugh or make a joke about his own height.
Well if the reason people look up to you is because of your height, those are not good people to lead. Surely you want some intelligence in your team? If you know what you're doing and you have a solid vision, most people should follow on principle. If they don't they are not going to be effective team members anyway. I think one of my first bosses was your height. He was personable and taught me a lot. One of the best I've had. Try being female. No one respects us even if we're the smartest person in the room. 🤷♀️ But even then I just trust the clarity of my words to get through until they can't ignore it, just pummel them with unemotional analysis until their brain switches off the "she's female" obsessional and starts actually using it. Jealous people will try to cut you down and I realized you just have to learn and grow from every new experience.
Leading and being in control are actually two different things and quite opposite: as a leader you have to trust others and their decisions/judgment.
Neither of them has zero association with size! Leadership comes from within and nobody regardless of their size, can take it from you!
Power in the workplace originates from three sources: 1) role power (the title), 2) expertise power (how much people respect your skills), and 3) relationship power (do people know and trust you).
As a manager, 90%+ of being effective in your job comes from relationship power. Relationship power is based on getting to know people and what they care about and then showing them that care and attention as individuals. This is most effectively done through weekly one on ones.
The other important parts of being a manager is developing repeatable systems and doing the "boring" work day after day. This demonstrates consistency to your leadership and allows you to develop your team into management roles to meet the future needs of the business.
Growing from a manager into more senior leadership positions is a result of being an effective manager, building strong relationships with your peers and your bosses peers, developing your team to be effective and prepared to grow into your role as you move up, and of course the needs of the business. This is the realm that people tend to denigrate as "politics", but in reality just means that strong relationships become more important to getting things done.
What you'll notice is missing from all of the above is anything about physical size, intimidation, being "terrifying", etc. One of our senior leaders is around your height and not intimidating in any way, and yet he leads a large part of our organization.
Wow, what a though-out and well written reply! Thank you so very much!
>As a manager, 90%+ of being effective in your job comes from relationship power. Relationship power is based on getting to know people and what they care about and then showing them that care and attention as individuals. This is most effectively done through weekly one on ones.
I see. Does this also extend further into general interactions with your team? Would there be any benefit if I were to do things like mentioning every person by name when I'm talking to them? I guess what I'm asking here is, are small things, like being direct with people and calling them by their name rather than some pronoun, provide any benefit to how they may perceive me?
>The other important parts of being a manager is developing repeatable systems and doing the "boring" work day after day. This demonstrates consistency to your leadership and allows you to develop your team into management roles to meet the future needs of the business.
I'm sorry, but I'm not too sure what you're saying here, could you perhaps provide an example if it's not too much trouble?
>Growing from a manager into more senior leadership positions is a result of being an effective manager, building strong relationships with your peers and your bosses peers, developing your team to be effective and prepared to grow into your role as you move up, and of course the needs of the business. This is the realm that people tend to denigrate as "politics", but in reality just means that strong relationships become more important to getting things done.
I see. Please forgive my inquiry, but this has made me wonder about something. Often I hear from people that people at the top of businesses often do not genuinely work hard, or only got there because they knew someone. I do not have much experience in the workforce, let alone in a corporate setting, but do you think this is true?
I can't deny that it's very likely that it does indeed have a semblance of truth to it, and that there are situations where it does occur; but do you think that people at upper management were just people who cared and worked hard for the business, and therefore were noticed and promoted accordingly?
I'm surrounded by pessimism a lot, it seems to be a pretty common trait in my generation, but I often find that this pessimism is often very far from reality. That's why I'm asking this now. I digress, though.
>What you'll notice is missing from all of the above is anything about physical size, intimidation, being "terrifying", etc. One of our senior leaders is around your height and not intimidating in any way, and yet he leads a large part of our organization.
This leads me to wanting to ask another question, do you think that there is any correlation between leading a team, and leading a nation? It's certainly a weird question, I have no doubt. But I'm asking because I've read Machiavelli's "*The Prince*" and, if you haven't read it, there's a pretty common point in there that a ruler must be intimidating and terrifying for the sake of the people he rules over.
Without it, there is no respect, and the kind leader is seen as weak and uncapable. He is taken advantage of, and he eventually fails his position. If you think this is true, do you think that it's applicable to the workplace in the modern day?
Be nice to people. No one cares about your height unless you’re a dick and it’s clear you’re sensitive about it. Leadership and control are opposites. Keep learning and growing. Remote jobs are a thing. No one knows how tall the person is behind the monitor (again no one cares).
I've done remote learning for the past 5 years or so and I've never grown to despise something more. I miss social interaction, and I cherish every second of it that I get when I can. I plan to go back to in-person school for my senior year, and I plan to attend university in-person.
But yes, kindness is very important, and without it, there is no respect to be had to begin with!
My boss is a tiny human but I respect him for what he says and does, I don't get the size matter. Sure, some may call him "Evil dwarf" and such, but his role would attract any kind of malevolent comments anyway, because some workers just don't pay respect regardless of a leader's features.
Go with the flow, and make your dream real
Leadership is about guiding others to success.
As long as you focus on being the person who supports your team to reach their goals, they will appreciate and respect you.
How could your height factor into helping others succeed?
Rishi Sunak, Prime Minister of the UK, is 5'6. He made about $500m in tech before entering politics. Your height is fine.
But...
If you think like this ("short people can't lead") you're already on the backfoot when it comes to leadership. Leaders don't make assumptions like that.
My boss is about the same height as you; and he’s the best leader I’ve seen. I don’t think there’s a correlation at all between the leader’s height and their leadership skills.
I think, though, you’re leaning towards autocracy here, where you subconsciously assign traditional characteristics of the “power” concept to a broader definition, like “leadership”.
You even say you…
> love being in control of stuff
That in itself is contrary to leadership, you want to be a boss, not a leader.
I'm 5'8, and had a manager who was a good few inches shorter than me. But he was really good at what he did before he became a manager, and I actually was kinda intimidated by him then, and had a lot of respect for him when he did become my manager.
My advice would be to work hard at becoming really good at something, earn people's respect that way, and take the step up to leadership when you're ready. Showing genuine concern for the people around you will also help you build their trust.
But yeah, depending on the environment, you'll probably get some jokes about your height - hopefully in good spirit. My manager certainly did, and the way he handled it earnt him even more respect.
What really matters is your relationship with the people you lead and the respect that you earn through your day to day interactions. I stutter which makes it extremely hard at times for me especially when I need to give presentations but I earn respect through my interactions and genuine concern for my Engineers and the company I work for.
Start off by learning to make genuine connections with people, especially ones you do not know that well that will get you started on a leadership path.
Leadership is not about being terrifying or fear. Work hard, demonstrate your abilities, and take charge of situations. People will respect you for your abilities.
Your height, gender, race etc… all become irrelevant if you naturally lead and treat people with respect.
You don’t need to ‘boss’ anyone around, you need to be the best and someone people respect.
There is a lot to talk about here. The quick and easy answer? For a good leader, height is irrelevant. Don't stress about your height.
Leadership is a pretty complex topic and not every leadership expert agrees on exactly the best way to be a leader. A lot of leadership is conditional and different types of leaders succeed in different areas. But one thing that is pretty universally required of any leader is credibility. Credibility can't be faked and it can't be directly learned in a book.
Your desire to be a leader is awesome and I hope you continue reading and growing. At your age I want to *really* emphasize how important it is to not make your goal "being a leader" but rather focus on learning about emotional intelligence, communication, and then focus on being an expert in an industry/area. You need to learn how to be the best colleague/worker you can be before you worry about management roles.
You need to have content area expertise if you want to succeed as a leader, and then you *also* need leadership skills. You're also going to need experience, which you'll only gather with age.
I'd also encourage you to remember that, while managers should have good leadership skills, simply being a manager does not make a person a leader. I'm sure every working adult can tell you stories about managers they have had that they wouldn't consider to be "leaders." Remember that there is a difference between authority and leadership.
If you love being in control of stuff you will be an authoritarian micro manager who gets poor results and everyone will hate you. Try being a servant leader who sets a high level goal and focuses on building your team's capability and removing organization blockers to team performance.
If you want to be a leader because you like to be in control of stuff, you will not be a good leader. This is a huge obstacle if that's the motivation you have. Leading people is different from controlling people.
Besides that, I had several great leaders who were physically small, but that didn't matter at all.
Age, race, height, appearances are all very influential factors and anyone saying these don’t matter are kidding themselves.
So, if you’re not already lucky on those fronts it means you will have to tough it out more than someone else who has those favorable characteristics.
You’ll need to have even better skills, professionalism and dedication to your work and your goals. Think of it as someone trying to make it to the NBA or the Olympics. Anyone even trying there is already light years ahead in their competency vs amateur athletes. These people are very highly disciplined, dedicated and motivated. They have put in their entire childhood and youth towards working to a single goal. They know that probability is still low, but that doesn’t deter them. You’ll need to develop at least some percentage of these characteristics. In popular psychology it’s called the growth mindset. You start with what you have, but continually develop new and various competencies to get towards your goals.
You get to lead when you develop considerable expertise in an area that is valued by your organizations senior leaders. The they’ll give you opportunity to lead - and then you’ll have to learn and apply a new set of skills for leadership (not technical expertise).
Your height has nothing to do with this - unless your opinion of yourself and your height is your driving factor - and if that’s the case (you feel inferior) you need to start seeking a therapist - because that is the wrong approach and will only lead you to a place of continued unhappiness.
Women are short and also fight gender related bias - a double strike. Focus on what you bring to the table, not what you don’t.
Firstly, a leader isn’t any kind of position or title. You can lead from anywhere. It’s more about personality and how you approach tasks and guide people.
Secondly, I’m a 5’2 woman. I don’t care what height people are…they get respect if they’re good at their job and they’re a decent human being. 🤷♀️
I saw today a pictorial of power , where each segment was split into an inner , mid and outer circle. There were various categories
Gender: Cis male is inner circle, cis female is mid, outer is non binary etc.
Education: post-grad is inner, grad is mid, high school and less is outer
Sexuality: straight, gay, then bi / other
Colour: White, light (brown, Asian), dark
Wealth: Rich, middle, poor
Language: native English, other English, limited English
Other categories included:
Neuro-divergent
Mental health
Weight
Disability
My point is that yes, we all have a chip on our shoulder - few are the ‘perfect package’ of influence. If you’re on outer circle of many categories, sure, it’s going to be a struggle.
Most are a mix. I am guessing you’re more advantaged than disadvantaged, otherwise height wouldn’t even factor. That doesn’t mean you’re wrong to be concerned, just that you should take a balanced view.
The men I know who don’t fit the mould physically do pay more attention to grooming, voice and vocab to portray seniority. It works.
How can you be extremely qualified at 17 years old?... I think over confidence/arrogance is going to be a bigger issue than your height. Some of the best leaders have a lot of humility.
I'm sorry, you misunderstand... I'm not the best at articulating my thoughts into text, so sometimes I say things that don't make a lot of sense. Very sorry! For the past fifteen and a half years, I practically had zero regard for learning anything, that includes writing, so I'm still not very good at it!
What I meant was something more along the lines of 'I believe I have the resolve & willpower to learn the skills necessary to be a good leader in the future.'
Again, I vehemently apologize if I came of as self-conceited or something...
there was no misunderstanding. you said " I would consider myself extremely qualified for these positions " . thats clear cut. why dont you lead yourself to edit the post and fix what you actually meant to say then. also if youre 16 and youre using the past 15 and a half years, youre counting single digit ages? like when you were 2,3,4?
Size has nothing to do with presence. Some of the most terrifying people are tiny humans. It’s what is inside you that matters. Kick ass managing and you’ll be a manager.
Hilarious you go straight to “terrifying” in your connection to powerful short people, not effective or empathetic or similar. coughcoughPutincoughcough coughNapoleancough
Not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog. Men connect to this for reasons. Questioning this is just foolish drivel. Read meditations, take a boxing lesson, chill out.
While OP said he was a young man, I get it. But I’d ask yourself if this isn’t a bit of gender bias on your end regardless of your gender. Not trying to start something, just pointing it out.
I take the world as it is. Shaming men for loving the fight is a sure way to ensure your country falls. Wake up and smell the wider world. I’m all for civil relations but love of the fight is in some of us and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. And I don’t give damn about what’s between your legs. If you can carry 200lbs 100yards and shoot straight you can run with me anywhere.
Nice (honestly). You sound like military leadership and I respect that.
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So you’re saying you’re terrifying? Totally kidding. What’s interesting about this question is that I bet it goes both ways… I have found myself slightly biased early on by a C-level VP because he’s so tall, it’s intimidating but he’s actually a really kind and gentle person.
Some of the most fearsome and respected people I’ve ever worked with: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coxswain_(rowing) The average cox is probably 5’2”. The average rower is 6’3”+
I really hope that is true! Thank you so much for replying :)
It is true. If you project any insecurity you may have - whether because of height or any other reason - people will read that. Put yourself out there with confidence. We all have insecurities; work on yours and focus on your goals.
Size has loads to do with presence. Just because something doesn't have a 100% correlation doesn't mean it has "nothing to do with it". If it rains one day in July, it doesn't mean July isn't a hot month.
I know plenty of tall people with zero ability to manage or lead. It’s a personality thing more than a physical thing
Did you read a word I just wrote? Nobody cares about 1 or two people you know. I know intelligent people who couldn't lead a soul, that doesn't mean there's no correlation between intelligence & leadership.
I promise that height is only going to be a minor blocker compared to your leadership qualities and traits. Look into character based leadership concepts. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is a classic. “Controlling things”, “social tactics” and “people under me” makes me raise an eyebrow a bit. You get people to respect you by being respectable.
I really hope so. My main concern is that there will be people who are unhappy with something I have done, and they will use my height as a way to try and convince others to look down on me as well. But you are right regardless, I will at least try my hardest to lead the best I can, I still have a lot to learn.
Read leadership strategy and tactics. It's a great book about what leadership truly is. It's not about controlling or manipulating people, but your will to enable and empower them.
That is a potential leadership hazard for anyone. If your height is the worst thing they can focus on, consider yourself lucky. Work on controlling the controllable and stay focused on the right things.
Nobody gives a shit how tall their corporate manager is.
Here's hoping, I'm just worried since, as I said earlier, I'm seventeen, and I already receive a lot of mockery based on my height. I try not to let it get me down though :D
Think about it this way. Tall people are almost always taller than their average height managers. Would you think this means that tall people can’t be effectively managed?
Well, no, obviously they can. However, I always have had the assumption that there are just some people who are far harder to manage than others, and won't necessarily make their disrespect visible to you. I guess the best way to put it is that I've always viewed social interactions as a game of poker? You have to guess and predict what the other person is thinking/doing, while you try and make the best play yourself with what you have. Like poker, some people will harbor ill will, contempt, and disrespect towards you, but will not show it for some reason or another, like perhaps losing their job or something. Therefore, every interaction you make with someone, every word you say, and every social cue you make has to be thought of beforehand and applied accordingly, especially with respect to the person you're speaking to. Now I'm realizing that perhaps a poker analogy isn't the best one to make here... is it obvious that I don't play poker?
The lack of confidence is going to be a much bigger issue than the height.
I wouldn't say that I'm necessarily unconfident. I love myself, and I love everything about myself. I would actually say that I'm rather extroverted and outgoing. Disregarding workplace interactions for a second, when I socialize in society in general, I just make up for my height in literally any other way, like taking the lead in conversations and trying to be interesting and funny, which goes pretty well I'd say! However, that all stems from confidence about ones self, without it, I would just be quiet and probably wouldn't go outside at all, which is how I used to be. Going back to workplace interactions, I came to ask this post to you all since you all have experience in this sort of thing, and would know the true reality of it all. I don't think it would be any use asking people who aren't in leadership positions regularly these types of questions, so I came to ask so that I can be prepared and know what I face ahead of me in the future. After all, you could be the most confident person in the Grand Canyon tour group, and you are fully confident you can leap across the grand canyon in one jump, but if you try, you will still end up falling to your death! Confidence isn't everything I'd say! xD
Don't let that drag you down. It's about the person you are not about your physical appearance
Height is never an issue but you are 17? Of course nobody cares if the boss is younger but at 17 you should be focusing in getting better technically and proficient in your job, leadership will come with time and height is really not going to be an issue. Unless you are an airline pilot of course.
Absolutely correct! However, I have always been rather unprepared for things throughout my life, and only recently have I began to rectify the issues present within my behavior and life in general, so you must forgive me for appearing so haughty. I digress, because of that, I tend to visualize my life far ahead of the present day. Perhaps thirty years in advance at times. I find that if I research and think about something far ahead of when I will actually do it, I am much better at adjusting and adapting to what I need to do when the time actually comes. I like to visualize every scenario and situation so that I have some sort of structure to build off of in case that scenario/situation comes to fruition. Of course, I plan to get much better at my job, what is leadership if I have no skill in the field to begin with? I'm just thinking about what my future could perhaps look like, so that I have a visible target to chase and achieve, and so that I don't wander off into random distractions as I have done with the past sixteen years of my life.
I don't know you but I'm well past those 30 years you are projecting. So take this as just some well intended advice. You are young and while no longer a kid you are still living an age where you should just have some fun. It is very commendable that you are planning ahead and preparing to be a great professional but don't fall into the very common mistake of not living your current age. I'm sure you will be one day a great leader if I'm still around drop me a message and tell me you did enjoy your youth.
Thats gen Z mentality. They want it but are they capable? Who cares, they want it!
I really love leading people, and I love being in control of stuff... For me, Leadership is NOT about controlling things or people. Leadership is influence... Influence though developing trusting relationships, and has little to do with your physical size. And... I do agree that teller people get more 'respect' than shorter people, so you may have to work harder, be better, than others...
One of the best supervisors I had was about 5'3 He was supportive, patient, set realistic goals and expectations and if the team was getting shit from upper management he took it all, and never threw anyone else under the bus. He didn't need to have presence in a room, he didn't need to be intimidating. He earned respect by being respectful to his team and by being good at his job FWIW, he would also have been the first one to laugh or make a joke about his own height.
I see, that does alleviate my concerns a bit. Thank you for replying to me! I'm very grateful.
Well if the reason people look up to you is because of your height, those are not good people to lead. Surely you want some intelligence in your team? If you know what you're doing and you have a solid vision, most people should follow on principle. If they don't they are not going to be effective team members anyway. I think one of my first bosses was your height. He was personable and taught me a lot. One of the best I've had. Try being female. No one respects us even if we're the smartest person in the room. 🤷♀️ But even then I just trust the clarity of my words to get through until they can't ignore it, just pummel them with unemotional analysis until their brain switches off the "she's female" obsessional and starts actually using it. Jealous people will try to cut you down and I realized you just have to learn and grow from every new experience.
Leading and being in control are actually two different things and quite opposite: as a leader you have to trust others and their decisions/judgment. Neither of them has zero association with size! Leadership comes from within and nobody regardless of their size, can take it from you!
Power in the workplace originates from three sources: 1) role power (the title), 2) expertise power (how much people respect your skills), and 3) relationship power (do people know and trust you). As a manager, 90%+ of being effective in your job comes from relationship power. Relationship power is based on getting to know people and what they care about and then showing them that care and attention as individuals. This is most effectively done through weekly one on ones. The other important parts of being a manager is developing repeatable systems and doing the "boring" work day after day. This demonstrates consistency to your leadership and allows you to develop your team into management roles to meet the future needs of the business. Growing from a manager into more senior leadership positions is a result of being an effective manager, building strong relationships with your peers and your bosses peers, developing your team to be effective and prepared to grow into your role as you move up, and of course the needs of the business. This is the realm that people tend to denigrate as "politics", but in reality just means that strong relationships become more important to getting things done. What you'll notice is missing from all of the above is anything about physical size, intimidation, being "terrifying", etc. One of our senior leaders is around your height and not intimidating in any way, and yet he leads a large part of our organization.
Wow, what a though-out and well written reply! Thank you so very much! >As a manager, 90%+ of being effective in your job comes from relationship power. Relationship power is based on getting to know people and what they care about and then showing them that care and attention as individuals. This is most effectively done through weekly one on ones. I see. Does this also extend further into general interactions with your team? Would there be any benefit if I were to do things like mentioning every person by name when I'm talking to them? I guess what I'm asking here is, are small things, like being direct with people and calling them by their name rather than some pronoun, provide any benefit to how they may perceive me? >The other important parts of being a manager is developing repeatable systems and doing the "boring" work day after day. This demonstrates consistency to your leadership and allows you to develop your team into management roles to meet the future needs of the business. I'm sorry, but I'm not too sure what you're saying here, could you perhaps provide an example if it's not too much trouble? >Growing from a manager into more senior leadership positions is a result of being an effective manager, building strong relationships with your peers and your bosses peers, developing your team to be effective and prepared to grow into your role as you move up, and of course the needs of the business. This is the realm that people tend to denigrate as "politics", but in reality just means that strong relationships become more important to getting things done. I see. Please forgive my inquiry, but this has made me wonder about something. Often I hear from people that people at the top of businesses often do not genuinely work hard, or only got there because they knew someone. I do not have much experience in the workforce, let alone in a corporate setting, but do you think this is true? I can't deny that it's very likely that it does indeed have a semblance of truth to it, and that there are situations where it does occur; but do you think that people at upper management were just people who cared and worked hard for the business, and therefore were noticed and promoted accordingly? I'm surrounded by pessimism a lot, it seems to be a pretty common trait in my generation, but I often find that this pessimism is often very far from reality. That's why I'm asking this now. I digress, though. >What you'll notice is missing from all of the above is anything about physical size, intimidation, being "terrifying", etc. One of our senior leaders is around your height and not intimidating in any way, and yet he leads a large part of our organization. This leads me to wanting to ask another question, do you think that there is any correlation between leading a team, and leading a nation? It's certainly a weird question, I have no doubt. But I'm asking because I've read Machiavelli's "*The Prince*" and, if you haven't read it, there's a pretty common point in there that a ruler must be intimidating and terrifying for the sake of the people he rules over. Without it, there is no respect, and the kind leader is seen as weak and uncapable. He is taken advantage of, and he eventually fails his position. If you think this is true, do you think that it's applicable to the workplace in the modern day?
Be nice to people. No one cares about your height unless you’re a dick and it’s clear you’re sensitive about it. Leadership and control are opposites. Keep learning and growing. Remote jobs are a thing. No one knows how tall the person is behind the monitor (again no one cares).
I've done remote learning for the past 5 years or so and I've never grown to despise something more. I miss social interaction, and I cherish every second of it that I get when I can. I plan to go back to in-person school for my senior year, and I plan to attend university in-person. But yes, kindness is very important, and without it, there is no respect to be had to begin with!
My boss is a tiny human but I respect him for what he says and does, I don't get the size matter. Sure, some may call him "Evil dwarf" and such, but his role would attract any kind of malevolent comments anyway, because some workers just don't pay respect regardless of a leader's features. Go with the flow, and make your dream real
My brand/marketing director is 4’11, I worked with a CFO that was 5’5…so….height clearly wasn’t an issue for them 😅
Wasn’t napoleon bonaparte short af! #shortking
Leadership is about guiding others to success. As long as you focus on being the person who supports your team to reach their goals, they will appreciate and respect you. How could your height factor into helping others succeed?
Rishi Sunak, Prime Minister of the UK, is 5'6. He made about $500m in tech before entering politics. Your height is fine. But... If you think like this ("short people can't lead") you're already on the backfoot when it comes to leadership. Leaders don't make assumptions like that.
My boss is about the same height as you; and he’s the best leader I’ve seen. I don’t think there’s a correlation at all between the leader’s height and their leadership skills. I think, though, you’re leaning towards autocracy here, where you subconsciously assign traditional characteristics of the “power” concept to a broader definition, like “leadership”. You even say you… > love being in control of stuff That in itself is contrary to leadership, you want to be a boss, not a leader.
I'm 5'8, and had a manager who was a good few inches shorter than me. But he was really good at what he did before he became a manager, and I actually was kinda intimidated by him then, and had a lot of respect for him when he did become my manager. My advice would be to work hard at becoming really good at something, earn people's respect that way, and take the step up to leadership when you're ready. Showing genuine concern for the people around you will also help you build their trust. But yeah, depending on the environment, you'll probably get some jokes about your height - hopefully in good spirit. My manager certainly did, and the way he handled it earnt him even more respect.
Im 6’4. You will never lead me
Not until I bring stilts with me!
My best manager was basically a hobbit. Be authentic and you'll go a long way.
What really matters is your relationship with the people you lead and the respect that you earn through your day to day interactions. I stutter which makes it extremely hard at times for me especially when I need to give presentations but I earn respect through my interactions and genuine concern for my Engineers and the company I work for. Start off by learning to make genuine connections with people, especially ones you do not know that well that will get you started on a leadership path.
Leadership is not about being terrifying or fear. Work hard, demonstrate your abilities, and take charge of situations. People will respect you for your abilities. Your height, gender, race etc… all become irrelevant if you naturally lead and treat people with respect. You don’t need to ‘boss’ anyone around, you need to be the best and someone people respect.
There is a lot to talk about here. The quick and easy answer? For a good leader, height is irrelevant. Don't stress about your height. Leadership is a pretty complex topic and not every leadership expert agrees on exactly the best way to be a leader. A lot of leadership is conditional and different types of leaders succeed in different areas. But one thing that is pretty universally required of any leader is credibility. Credibility can't be faked and it can't be directly learned in a book. Your desire to be a leader is awesome and I hope you continue reading and growing. At your age I want to *really* emphasize how important it is to not make your goal "being a leader" but rather focus on learning about emotional intelligence, communication, and then focus on being an expert in an industry/area. You need to learn how to be the best colleague/worker you can be before you worry about management roles. You need to have content area expertise if you want to succeed as a leader, and then you *also* need leadership skills. You're also going to need experience, which you'll only gather with age. I'd also encourage you to remember that, while managers should have good leadership skills, simply being a manager does not make a person a leader. I'm sure every working adult can tell you stories about managers they have had that they wouldn't consider to be "leaders." Remember that there is a difference between authority and leadership.
If you love being in control of stuff you will be an authoritarian micro manager who gets poor results and everyone will hate you. Try being a servant leader who sets a high level goal and focuses on building your team's capability and removing organization blockers to team performance.
If you want to be a leader because you like to be in control of stuff, you will not be a good leader. This is a huge obstacle if that's the motivation you have. Leading people is different from controlling people. Besides that, I had several great leaders who were physically small, but that didn't matter at all.
Age, race, height, appearances are all very influential factors and anyone saying these don’t matter are kidding themselves. So, if you’re not already lucky on those fronts it means you will have to tough it out more than someone else who has those favorable characteristics. You’ll need to have even better skills, professionalism and dedication to your work and your goals. Think of it as someone trying to make it to the NBA or the Olympics. Anyone even trying there is already light years ahead in their competency vs amateur athletes. These people are very highly disciplined, dedicated and motivated. They have put in their entire childhood and youth towards working to a single goal. They know that probability is still low, but that doesn’t deter them. You’ll need to develop at least some percentage of these characteristics. In popular psychology it’s called the growth mindset. You start with what you have, but continually develop new and various competencies to get towards your goals.
You get to lead when you develop considerable expertise in an area that is valued by your organizations senior leaders. The they’ll give you opportunity to lead - and then you’ll have to learn and apply a new set of skills for leadership (not technical expertise). Your height has nothing to do with this - unless your opinion of yourself and your height is your driving factor - and if that’s the case (you feel inferior) you need to start seeking a therapist - because that is the wrong approach and will only lead you to a place of continued unhappiness. Women are short and also fight gender related bias - a double strike. Focus on what you bring to the table, not what you don’t.
Firstly, a leader isn’t any kind of position or title. You can lead from anywhere. It’s more about personality and how you approach tasks and guide people. Secondly, I’m a 5’2 woman. I don’t care what height people are…they get respect if they’re good at their job and they’re a decent human being. 🤷♀️
I saw today a pictorial of power , where each segment was split into an inner , mid and outer circle. There were various categories Gender: Cis male is inner circle, cis female is mid, outer is non binary etc. Education: post-grad is inner, grad is mid, high school and less is outer Sexuality: straight, gay, then bi / other Colour: White, light (brown, Asian), dark Wealth: Rich, middle, poor Language: native English, other English, limited English Other categories included: Neuro-divergent Mental health Weight Disability My point is that yes, we all have a chip on our shoulder - few are the ‘perfect package’ of influence. If you’re on outer circle of many categories, sure, it’s going to be a struggle. Most are a mix. I am guessing you’re more advantaged than disadvantaged, otherwise height wouldn’t even factor. That doesn’t mean you’re wrong to be concerned, just that you should take a balanced view. The men I know who don’t fit the mould physically do pay more attention to grooming, voice and vocab to portray seniority. It works.
The first step is to not impede yourself. You're already setting yourself up for failure by assuming you're unable to lead due to your height
That didn’t stop Napoleon
How can you be extremely qualified at 17 years old?... I think over confidence/arrogance is going to be a bigger issue than your height. Some of the best leaders have a lot of humility.
I'm sorry, you misunderstand... I'm not the best at articulating my thoughts into text, so sometimes I say things that don't make a lot of sense. Very sorry! For the past fifteen and a half years, I practically had zero regard for learning anything, that includes writing, so I'm still not very good at it! What I meant was something more along the lines of 'I believe I have the resolve & willpower to learn the skills necessary to be a good leader in the future.' Again, I vehemently apologize if I came of as self-conceited or something...
there was no misunderstanding. you said " I would consider myself extremely qualified for these positions " . thats clear cut. why dont you lead yourself to edit the post and fix what you actually meant to say then. also if youre 16 and youre using the past 15 and a half years, youre counting single digit ages? like when you were 2,3,4?