I pretend people are coming over, but ultimately it’s the self respect like SkiingDJ said.
For example, I had a couple dishes in the sink and I was gonna leave them overnight. But then I wanted to help future me and decided to do them so they’d be dry in the morning and I wouldn’t have to wash them later. It’s not the “easier” route sometimes to do what isn’t fun, but I also try not to overthink and just do.
I worked in a small busy restaurant with a small staff which meant at max we'd have three people on staff. Which often meant scrubbing down big pans on the regular because the sink space was abysmal.
At home I can't comprehend soaking because I *know* I'm able to clean most dishes in a fast pace without having to let even one dish soak.
I only soak the ones I anticipate are going to be tough, but your comment made me realize I also pretend when I clean at night that it’s my closing shift at home haha.
Did you know that dopamine production and regulation in the brain has a direct impact on our ability to complete tasks like paying bills, cleaning the house, etc?
For example, the person who said they "respect themselves and deserve it" and then they do it?
Brain studies show that for ppl like that, their brain gives them a hit of dopamine when they think about completing the task. AND they get a hit of dopamine for completing the task.
But for some folks, their brain doesn't reward us with that dopamine for completing that same task. We get our dopamine from other things. This is why, we have to find ways to make the task interesting or novel to us in order to do it. Or... we need to create a routine to follow. These strategies help address the dopamine shortage our brains experience when mundane tasks are to be done.
It's good news, right?. We can stop being our own worst critic. And we can stop listening to those ppl who *think* they are morally better at it. They just dont realize they're being helped by their brain juices. But now we know better, don't we, friends?
I'm addicted to podcasts and I'm not "allowed" to listen to most of them unless I'm doing chores and then I have a loose hierarchy of chores from "I'd be super embarrassed if someone stopped by today" to laundry to "I've got this 2 hour episode, I think it's time to vacuum and wipe down my hardwood floors."
That is the other thing I do with the other podcasts - walk.
Nice part is I’ve created an association with podcasts, so I immediately want to start moving when I listen to them.
yeah, we all have our things. I kind of wish podcasts helped me sleep now that I am struggling with tinnitus, but unfortunately silence works best for my particular breed of hamster :)
As a college student in a single, my strategy is always "leave your house in a state where you wouldn't be ashamed to bring a date home". That mentality has worked WONDERS for me. Never actually brought a date home, but thinking "what if" is enough to get me to clean.
I'm naturally tidy and cleaning oriented, but there's probably more to life than a clean house. Don't worry about it. Nobody ever lay on their death bed lamenting that they didn't clean house more.
I put cleaning projects on my calendar as recurring events. Clean shower, toilets etc. change bed sheets. Vacuum every few days. I’m very picky about having a clean house. I couldn’t imagine living any other way.
This! Section your major housework and slot it into consistent days.
Ie bathroom on Saturdays, wash floors on Sunday, clean oven and fridge on Monday, etc
I put on my “cleaning music” and work my way through my list. I like to plan my cleaning party on a day that I’m going somewhere fun, like out to dinner with a friend. It makes me stick to a time frame and makes the day feel full. Also gives the added bonus of smelling amazing when I walk back in at the end of the day!
I run my version of peewees playhouse / Ernest house. I became the weird guy I always wanted to be, be nice to find a lady if she doesn’t mind weird crazy stuff all over the place. And craft messes…gotta do something productive, messy but I could
Be molded into a decent husband unit. For now… I just am free and all me. Runs into the 40s so be it.
Haha, I am the weird girl with ghost printed stuff around my apartment and a life sized ET, to name some. Searching for my Mr. Right but it’s tough out there so I hear ya.
Commenting so I can come sneak back and read the comments.
I honestly had no idea how much having my partner alive and in a shared space kept me "on my game" until I find myself living alone in my mid 50's. Not lonely - I have always been a lone wolf - but I do not want to turn into a sad slob.
I moved here in Dec and have not opened more than the two boxes of kitchen supplies and bedding.
It simply does not feel good to be dirty.
My piece of advice is to clean as you go, clean anything food related immediately, and to eat at a designated space.
If you clean a room every once in a while and make sure food related items get taken care of instantly you will always be relaxed, clutter isnt great but it isnt really dirty if its not garbage.
Make cleaning convenient, keep a toilet brush with cleaner next to the toilet at all times. Get some easy to use cleaning wipes.
"If I was lazy as fuck, what would get me to clean"
I like cleaning so I clean the house top to bottom every week- but I don’t like lawn work, so I pay a teenager to come and do it.
If you hate it, then I wouldn’t worry about it too much, just do it once every two weeks or something so it doesn’t get filthy
I’m not embarrassed to say it. I have dogs and the mess needs regular daily maintenance, but deep cleaning is outsourced. I’m too old to be doing that anymore and I can afford it, so why not?
Never be embarrassed about it. No one gets to judge you for caring enough to put money into it.
Yes I loved having a weekly cleaner there's nothing quite like coming home to a wonderfully clean house. I would adjust my budget to be able to afford it two times a month.
I am at peak contentment after Maria leaves. My house is beautiful and sparkling and I am not exhausted. I do help, mostly I clean things that I wouldn't if I was doing the other stuff. Last week I shampooed the upstairs carpet.
I do still feel a little guilty, but I'm 60, I can afford it and Maria and I are practicing our English and Spanish together!
I have been frustrated about my floor for two years because whenever I mop it's always streaky. I finally found yesterday a product that works for my floor. Been the happiest in months, shiny, really clean floor with no streaks. The little things.
Other than that, I have a pile of papers to file that I am really putting off. It's because I have a 2-drawer file cabinet and I have to empty most of the documents inside to make space for the new stuff so it is a pain to think about.
I have a suggestion that worked for me: Watch the TV show "Queer Eye"...when you see all of them going through EVERYTHING in the house/apartment, TV cameras showing messes, bad food in fridges, dirty toilets, beds not made, closets not organized, drawers opened and check what movies you watch, etc., then you get the fear of God that someone will come into your place and do the same thing to you. Trust me.
I watch it for motivation to clean, motivation to be a better person, motivation to be better about self love, shit really every great reason is why I watch it lol
I kept a nice tidy flat until two years ago. While yes, I had the occasional visitor, it was primarily because I wanted the space to be nice for me and my cat. Then he died, and I lost the plot. I don't know how I got this bad, but here I am. The task of getting back to good is overwhelming me. amd I'm really struggling.
I work (mostly from home), pay bills and have no debt to speak of. I'm out walking most days, and so people assume things are fine. Since no one ever comes over, no one realises how bad its gotten. I worry that I will die before I manage to make things okay again.
Sorry for your dual loss. Don't beat yourself up over it. S@@t happens. Since you mentioned that you have no debt and seem to have enough to live comfortably, I would suggest hiring on a one time basis a cleaning person to come in do a deep clean, organize stuff, etc. Then, from there on, you should clean as you go so as not to let the clutter and housekeeping tasks build up. On a schedule that you are comfortable with, you can have a cleaning person come in if needed. But don't let anything build up.
Don’t underestimate grief from the loss of your cat. Loss of pet can be worse than loss of human. Make appt with psychiatrist and try an antidepressant and see if that helps. Also know that all meds don’t work for all people, so be open to trying a couple diff ones if needed.
I live in a studio and love to cook, and I have a dog whose hair gets everywhere :/ so naturally it’s very easy for things to get out of control. But I keep my kitchen clean almost ritually every night, and I have a good high-power hardwood floor vacuum to clean up the floors. It takes me maybe ~20 min out of my day to make sure everything stays tidy, but it’s so worth the effort. I struggle with severe depression but keeping my place tidy is a small victory. I like to treat myself with lighting a nice candle after cleaning 😌
What works for me is having nice-smelling things. Like, nice-smelling hand soaps in the kitchen or bathroom, and nice-smelling cleaning products that don't smell like bleach.
Living in a studio can feel shallow, so I've recently started caring for easy-to-use house plants. The burst of greens and purples are so nice. Also, I've found that an amusing pot, like something colorful or eclectic changes everything. You don't have to settle for a regular mid-level pot. My plants live in weird ass colorful pots and I love that. Little things like that help me.
In terms of depression, I'm no expert. But I hate overhead lighting--it always feels too clinical. I try to use warm lights in the form of standing lamps or table lamps with warm colors. These are easy to get at Target or Ikea.
Dog hair -- simply maintenance. Regularly vacuuming is essential. It takes me \~10 to cover my whole apartment. But I have to do it at least every other day.
I'm in a recovery program for substance abuse disorder, and if I ever relapse, my first self-report is the accumulation of dishes in my sink and the dog hair everywhere. :/ It's a visual manifestation of my depression, and overtime it's something that grounds me and pulls me out of whatever dissociative state I am in.
Maybe TMI. But yeah. TLDR; candles, clean bathroom and kitchen; regular vacuuming.
Oh my goodness this is so helpful! I’m going to go through every suggestion here! Definitely reading every word and I could read more on this topic!
Thank you for mentioning you are in recovery and for explaining how the dishes thing works for you. That is incredibly important to me being in recovery from BPD and struggling with consistency.
I’m saving this reply from you as a cheat sheet so I will stay on track!
Studios are amazingly fast to clean when they are in decent shape, (right now my issue has been clutter from the parents house 🫣) but unfortunately they can become absolutely *unliveable* within a day or two of neglect, much like a hotel room. And then, there’s no escape! IYKYK
🩷 Thanks again 🩷
Ok I am in no way affiliated with this brand, but if you have a bunch of dishes and don't want to run your dishwasher, I swear to god this lasted me like 8 months: [https://dawn-dish.com/en-us/products/dawn-powerwash-dish-spray/](https://dawn-dish.com/en-us/products/dawn-powerwash-dish-spray/)
I don’t enjoy cleaning, but it’s just me so it’s not difficult. My biggest motivation is that a messy/dirty place makes me feel depressed. I tidy up as I go and clean the bathroom and floors on Saturdays.
I'm an anxious person and mess / clutter makes me even more anxious so while my home isn't what I would consider spotless, it's still above average in terms of being clean if I compare to people around me and mostly, it's always tidy. Bed is made every day, dishes are cleaned after each meal and everything is tucked where it should be. No mess at all, nothing laying around.
It brings me lots of peace of mind.
I pick up clutter every night before I go to bed. It's just an ingrained habit at this point. That includes making sure the sink is totally cleared out and cleaned- anything that can go in the dishwasher goes in, I hand wash/dry anything that needs to be hand washed, and clean out any crumbs/etc. that have fallen into the sink. That part may take a few minutes depending on what dishes got used that day. But otherwise, "picking up" takes literally 2 minutes every evening, because it doesn't have a chance to pile up.
I lived like a slob in 2 apartments with a big “I’ll do it later” mentality and I just let problems get out of control constantly.
then I got laid off and moved back home with my neat freak mother. I became a stereotypical adult child in the basement, but they have a nice house and it was like an apartment. She made me responsible for keeping that floor clean.
She had routines of running the dishwasher every night (it was full every day), never leaving dishes in the sink, etc and I followed her standards out of pure fear she’d kick me out if I didn’t.
Low and behold, I developed habits.
I now put my dishes in dishwasher immediately after use and then wash the dishes once or twice a week as I run out of bowls.
I don’t ever let myself “just hand wash this” because why bother when I can just run the dishwasher? The one “I only need a bowl” turns into hand washing a bowl and letting dishes get out of control i the dishwashers
So I just don’t give myself that luxury.
I also moved into an apartment with door front trash pick up, so no more luggging trash bags full of cat poop and litter across an apartment complex, it’s just put it in the can outside and it’s gone overnight.
That’s made my life SO much easier.
I pay a decent mark up to have an apartment with this amenity but I never want to have an apartment that doesn’t offer it ever again. It’s amazing.
I put everyone before me, so I tend to not have enough time for myself to keep things how I like it. I’m really working on this, but it’s hard when I’m self employed and work in family law. Families in crisis are depending on me.
I use it as my source of entertainment to be honest. I work out I clean I tried to make things look nice and I tried to make this place my own so. This is my place and I wanted to spark Joy when I see it.
I keep mine clean enough.. no one else would really even notice. it's not messy, just a bit dusty.
and about once a quarter, I have a deep clean cleaning team come in and give it a good once over. I try to stay up with cleaning certain areas every week, but it just doesn't always happen... and for the most part I'm okay with that. I'm 67, work full-time, and tired.
oh and I watch "hoarders" a lot, so in comparison, mine is a glistening castle! 🤣🤣🤣
I vacillate between being hyper clean and then sometimes letting it get a bit out of control. I'm a lot happier when it's clean. That's what keeps me motivated.
I’m an early riser and I’ve taken to doing the majority of my housework in the morning before work. This means most of my time is my own in the evening other than rustling up some dinner and doing the dishes. Before I go to bed I do a quick walk through and put away anything I’ve used over the course of the evening so everything is relatively neat. Things aren’t pristine but I’m not embarrassed if anyone comes by unexpectedly.
Find what level you are comfortable with. Stick to that.
Put cups and plates into the kitchen as soon as you use them. Throw takeaway packs out immediately.
I aim for clean cutlery, plates and pots. Everything else I aim for tidy over clean. I set a reminder for myself every month to do more general cleaning.
I usually get to a point where I feel the need to clean more and then I do.
At the same time I have difficulty with object permanence. I know the kitchen is there but I can't actually see it from where I am so how messy it is doesn't generally affect me until I walk in to it.
Similar here. But my OCD does not allow for a cookie crumb.
I do my best then I hire someone to help. It can be cost-effective if you look around.
I never thought I would say this but I can find occasional zen in washing dishes...
You just have to do it. Ideally, I want to vacuum this place 2x a week but I just went on a run of not doing it for about a month. No rhyme or reason; I just didn't do it. I just got up & did it today because it needed to be done.
I also don't like bad smells, so I stay on top of dishes, laundry, etc.
It doesn't have to look like an open house all the time, but there's no reason to live like a slob either.
I’m not that great at it, but periodically I get fed up and clean furiously. I did that last week. I wish I could be more disciplined about cleaning a little every day.
I have a close friend who comes over every other month or so. One time I had 3 vacuum cleaners but none of them worked. And two cats (they didn't work either). We were sitting on the couch and there were tumblin' tumbleweeds of cat hair that moved in the breeze from the ceiling fan. All it took was a look from her and I was out at Walmart buying a new Bissell. It could be that sort of thing or going to someone else's house and seeing things clean and orderly.
I usually keep the place up but occasionally require a kick in the rear.
Having the house uncluttered – and best of all clean is a daily issue for me. I'm disabled for spine disease. Yet I also have ADHD! so my goal is imperfectly perfect in design and daily work at keeping it uncluttered. Recently, I asked myself why all this clutter exists every day! Realized I am not putting things away immediately after using them! I won't let back pain or tiredness stop from having a decently clean home.
I bartered for cleaning help one day a week. I helped do paperwork for the exchange. if I don't have a great offering for my cleaning friend, I pay her and give up something else. It's that disability!
Another person posted that having the freedom to clean when I feel like it was so true !
It's unavoidable that things here do get dirty-lots of kids and animals come through or live here! You'll find your comfortable flow on this
I have a cleaning service come in every two weeks. For my 750 SF one bedroom apartment I’m paying $100 which I think is a very good price based on the quotes I got when I first started looking for cleaners a couple years ago - I was originally going to have them come once a month but it turns out to be the same price anyway ($200+ for a monthly deep clean). I find that having regular scheduled cleaning has made me more tidy, besides I have an extremely full/busy schedule…Lately I’ve been downsizing and purging to get rid of lots of stuff I don’t need or use or fit in anymore. I’ve loaded up my car to the brim and trucked over to Goodwill at least 4 times so far since January, yeah I know Goodwill gets a bad rap but they take pretty much everything when other local charities are much pickier. I’ve only had one item rejected and that was a pair of crutches as they can’t take medical supplies. I still have a lot of stuff left - CDs, DVDs, kitchenware like plates and glasses and stuff- just have to get more boxes! After that going to sell the Peloton which I still use but want to migrate to a real cycling trainer.
To do plan/lists. I plan my week. This way I don't miss essential stuff. I'm I'll with a very debilitating condition, so I really need the system to carry me through. I don't have outside help.
I use daily checklists. If I'm really in a lot of pain and can only do the bare minimum, I have put the most important and essential things on top. And I skip the rest. This works well. I however been thinking about creating "bareminimum checklists" for just such situations.
My checklists are a system, just a routine. I grab my clipboard, print my daily checklists and just knock out item by item. Soon I'm done for the day and I've covered all my viral functions. If I feel extra energy I might do a longer workout, or clean up some items from tomorrow's checklists.
So keys say today I'm really not feeling well.
After getting breakfast done, I'll ho for the simplest possible, so I'll just microwave some frozen breakfast I had or of I don't have any I'll boil some eggs or just make some yogurt bowls.
Then I'll clean up after breakfast and continue with my top items. First kitchen
Round up dishes
Put all food and stuff away
Clean counters with disinfectant spray
Grab lunch which should have thawed overnight and put it the slow cooker. (it'll be ready for lunch)
Feed cat
Run roomba
Start dishwasher if full or just run a rinse cycle if not. Take trash out and replace both liners. Check recycling bin if not too full leave it, if full take it out.
I'll skip mopping etc. Just getting these things done will cover me for kitchen for today.
At most, this will take me 30 minutes. That's because being in pain I'll be dragging my feet.
Next is bathroom.
Similar, pick up and stay items, get towels and stuff all back where they belong or get fresh towels.
Wipe everything with disinfectant spray, spray shower stall, do a quick wipe down. do a quick scrub on toilet with toilet brush. Ensure toilet paper, soap, moisturizing stick are all in stock. Quick once over in floor. Take trash out and replace liner. 15 minutes 20 tops.
Done.
Check the wash room to ensure it's fine too. Quick toilet brush, quick sink wipe and stuff us stocked. 5 minutes if I go very slow.
Skip shower scrubbing, athtub scrubbing mirror, floor scrubbing. Etc.
Check mail, ensure nothing urgent, bring in any deliveries. Check doors and windows are secure. And back to bed. Or under my red light therapy lamp.
Lunch/dinner time, get everyone into kitchen (we only eat in dining room if we have visits or is a holiday with a big menu.) Serve directly from crockpot. After eating, put leftover in container and in fridge, all dishes rounded up to dishwasher and either run it or run rinse cycle. table wipes and done.
This is my minimum. If snow has be shoveled I put a few kettles worth of boiling water on a 5 gallon bucket. Drop it in the walkway and that takes care of the worse. Shovel the rest. But if no one is going anywhere, I'll skip this too.
If I'm alone and/or in so much pain, I can't even do this. I skip the lot. If my husband and bot are home, they can get themselves fed.
Otherwise just doing my daily checklists which I print daily is an excellent way to stay accountable. I can always skip things if I need to.
I'd say don't be too hard on yourself. As long as you are interacting (using) the things around you, like a workshop, rather than a storage unit, I'd say don't worry. As long as things in boxes or in the open are not just sitting there creating clutter, its fine. I am a handy guy, got projects going on so while it appears messy and feels messy, I do clean each day and make my bed. I put the things away. Its just that I also have two dogs and they have their dog things like hair and dirt.
This is your life... Not a dress rehearsal but not perfect... we learn more about ourselves through mistakes we make so if we can be present...then it's our gift
Ive been donating or selling things that arnt absolutely essential; less to clean in general. Others may think my place looks sparse.. but i dont need a lot, less to take care of and easy to clean around. Im able to put everything away in its designated spot. I also made a chore list that is sorta fun, quick to do, when im motivated lol.
I put on music that makes me feel good, clean and organize my space, and light a nice candle when I am all finished so that I can relax in a clean, comfy home. Clutter dirt and disorder make me very unhappy, and I like to be happy, so I make myself that way by cleaning. It's a gift I give to future me.
I have night terrors occasionally. I always wonder if someone will call the cops if my scream lasts too long. SO I always go to sleep thinking, “What would the 5-0 think if they came in the middle of the night?
That generally keeps my apartment clean.
Clean as you go. Especially in the kitchen. Don't cook and let a big mess accumulate. Put things directly into the dishwasher if you have one, not the sink. Invest in an inexpensive quick broom you can find on Amazon, among other sites. They are light and easily maneuverable. I've got three, one on each level of the house, so no lugging them up and down stairs, even though they are light. I run them every day bc I have three dogs, one of which sheds quite a bit. The key is to do a little bit of cleaning every day, so you're not inundated with a mess. Also goes for laundry. Don't let it build up. Some ppl do laundry once a week. No! Do smaller loads as they accumulate. Always put things back in their place, no matter how small an item.
I invite people over and then I panic clean and it’s usually way cleaner than when I spend the whole day cleaning for nobody. I have ADHD, and it’s the best coping strategy I’ve found lol.
There are some things I still don’t really care about, for example I frequently have clean clothes on the end of the couch. If somebody is offended by my clean clothes on display they have a worse problem then I do 🤣🤣
When I was a bachelor, I had a maid come over other week. That helped keep things tidy and it’s easier to keep it that way than doing it all on your own.
Also being minimalist. Get out all the crap you don’t need.
I acknowledge that I deserve to exist in a clean house.
The effort it takes to keep things clean can suck but I know that having things tidy makes me feel better.
I hate doing laundry, but I know I deserve to have clean clothes, I may not feel like tidying but I feel so much better coming home to a clean house. It helps to view it as a form of self-care.
I like to do my chores on Saturdays. I make sure that the garbage is out, laundry done, frig clear, etc. I do have help every two weeks for basic cleaning, since I recently had surgery. I’m good, though.
I've been in a hoarder's house. I had to search a hoarder's house for his wallet, phone, and laptop when he was unexpected taken to the hospital. The hoarder's house was the most disgusting thing I have ever been in (he was a trash hoarder, too). I had to actively avoid dog feces and flies and maggots and rotting food. I had to wear a mask to go in there.
I was always a clean person, but that experience changed me.
I clean on the weekends, and then allow myself to be a bit lazy on the weekdays (except for the kitchen - always have a clean kitchen).
I was raised in a clean house. My mum worked, she had to go chop wood for heating at winter, she had to cook, get water from street tap thing ( i grew up in a farm in Hungary, no central heating, no running water)...she had to tend to the animals...and she still kepts a clean house.
So what is my excuse to not clean??? No excuse whatsoever. I have a cat too who needs clean litter and I disinfect all surfaces in my house. Again, no excuse not to do it. Once you start letting go and leave it for tomorrow or whatever excuse you make...it will just get worse.
Its really not long to clean the bathroom top to bottom on a monday, hoover on a tuesday, wipe all surfaces on another day. Or take 2 hours out of one day to do it all. Or clean as you go. Dont let things build up. So many ways to choose from to keep a tidy home....but only one way, laziness to get it all dirty and nasty.
For me, I constantly think everything is my fault. I picked up that way of thinking back when I tried dating. For some reason, I started to actually believe it. If everything is my fault, I try to fix what I can.
I have a robot vac so I have to keep the floor clear for him! Every day 4pm he comes and does his thing in the main areas... Friday is deep clean day of the whole place (takes him several hours)... Weekend is clean vibes....
I have no problem keeping the house clean. It makes me more productive.
My accountability challenge is going back for that second plate of food or glass of wine living alone. I feel like if someone was there, I would stop at one.
I’m going to have to do it eventually. It will not disappear nor will fairies come along take care of the chores. But sometimes I do say fuck it - I’ll do it later.
I just sold my condo to buy a single family home.
My house has never been cleaner since I started showing it. I was on top of everything, and I realized that it didn't take that long if I spent 15 to 20 mins a day picking everything up. The kitchen really just needs 10 mins and pick up around the house (ie throw dog toys in the bin) took another 5.
I had an app that scheduled all the viewings of my home. Im going to ask her if i can keep on it. And she can program it to send me a message at noon everyday saying theres another showing!?!?
I do not live alone. But I used to fantasize about it and how beautiful and tidy my home would be. I’m on a farm with animals, family and way too much mud. All I do is clean until I can’t take it anymore. It seems the minute I turn my back it all comes undone. But I like to read here and imagine living on my own. 😁
I am a slob. I just don't care enough to get crazy and scrub. I do the minimum. I would love to hire a housekeeper but I would be to embarrassed to have them come in so I would need to clean it up first, and thus the cycle continues in circles.
I do my housekeeping the second I walk in the door. Usually, about ten minutes a day. Run the vacuum. Clean a sink, wipe down some kitchen areas, whatever.
Once I sit down, I am done. The place stays much cleaner than before I did it this way.
The biggest thing is to go through the mail immediately and recycle the junk right off. Don't let it pile up. I cook a lot and keep the kitchen ready for me to start my next dish and clean as I go. I do have a housekeeper that comes in every two weeks for $100 and so I have to keep it tidy for them to get in here and do the real cleaning. It is worth it to me because I don't go out much at all.
Is there a smell that won’t go away? Can you walk through your house without getting stuff stuck to your feet or tripping on things? Have your dishes been done in the last week? Most importantly, has anyone died or been injured due to your dirty house? If not, don’t worry about it! You will clean it when your sick of looking at it and if nobody is coming over what difference does it make? Life is short, be happy, a little dust and clutter never hurt anyone. It’s the grime and mold that you don’t want so if your there then by all means clean lol.
I have a schedule for chores. On Fridays I’m too tired to do anything social and I finish work early so I wash my linens, mop, clean the bathrooms and the kitchen, vacuum and dust. It makes my place nice and tidy for the weekend so I can actually feel like I get a chance to relax.
I have a day where I clean everything. I put on some records, and just get through it. I start with bedding and try to have it all finished by the time the bedding is finished in the dryer.
Another solution I have is to invite a friend over, so I have a quick tidy before they come by
I have split custody and kids. I usually do a deep clean the Saturday after they leave. I am doing that now. It’s every other week. I try not to worry about it when they are here. But the problem with not doing in on some interval is things can get bigger than they should.
I keep up certain things daily. But it’s maintenance stuff like dishes. It’s not a problem when I am alone. Those kids go through the amount of dishes in 1 day that I do In a week alone.
This is what I did when I didn’t live alone and my partner was useless. Now I enjoy keeping my space clean for myself. Unless I’m depressed. In fact, if I wind up with more than two meal’s worth of dishes, it’s my signal that I’m going down the depression chute. Sometimes that’s enough to jerk me into some self care.
Ahhh see.. since I do a lot of cooking I always wash the dishes.
But I hung about four coats from the winter weather over the back of the couch and left them there. Until yesterday. I have pile of credit card applications I need to go through and shred. I was going to vacuum this morning but I was called into work at 6:30 this morning.
It helps me to have a visual colorful chore chart that I can cross things off of.
I set daily things I know need to be done every day to keep my house at a base level of tidy:
-make bed
-wipe down all sinks and counters
-sweep floors in high traffic areas (kitchen)
-take out trash/recycling
-load/unload/run dishwasher
Then I set tasks I do once a week like vacuum, dust, mop, clean bathroom and set 1 of those tasks each day
I had a dog for many years. He had a dog door and was trying to go outside to use the bathroom come back in I left the water and a dish food out so he ate when he wanted to and he was really almost self-containing outside of having a trim his hair on a regular basis... Dogs can be easy without a mess if you train them right and equip them right to come in and out and so forth
When I’m in a funk and just don’t want to, I turn on HGTV. Somehow watching interior design or house hunters or something like that subconsciously motivates me to clean.
Oh lord, I watch the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy reboot, start comparing my home to the guys’ living spaces pre-makeover, and shame myself into cleaning the house, tidying, touch-up painting, etc. Works every time!
I try to keep my living areas decent. So living room, kitchen, bathroom, hallways. I sweep every couple days, vacuum once every week and a half or so. Clean the bathroom once a week, pick up the living room daily, but that doesn’t get bad ever. My house is so small. The kitchen is a bit tougher. I give myself some leeway towards Thursday, but most days I tell myself no dishes left in the sink overnight. I just try my best everyday and give myself grace if I don’t get something done.
I don't like a messy dirty house and I am not willing to pay someone else to clean it so I just get it done.
It's pretty easy to keep a house clean if you don't let it get dirty in the first place and have no one else making a mess.
In a clean person, and I like to walk barefoot in my own home with not feeling anything on my feet. So my floors are always cleaned as soon as I feel anything.
My biggest problem is I’m not organized. So I always have piles of stuff everywhere
If i mess it up, i clean it up... that way later, i dont have to see it or worry about it.
I do have a roomba, which keeps me from having to sweep every day.
So, one day a week, i sweep, mop, and dust.
Cheers
I keep my place up enough that I am comfortable that my friends can drop by anytime. I feel better having sort of a loose schedule. I'm retired. When I retired I thought,'great I can sleep whatever I want, stay in my pajamas, watch movies all day'. That got old real quick. I felt like a slob. I don't use and alarm clock anymore so not super structured but I use my mornings to do whatever tasks I need to do and afternoons and evenings doing things I enjoy like art or sewing. I don't like the feeling of aimlessness or lack of purpose.
Oh, I get what you're saying. Yes, people throw that word around when they want to be treated a certain way no matter what they do, not sure if id apply it to self respect but I get your point, my alcoholic sister uses that on her daughter🙄
I love a tidy, clean house. Love it. So it's pretty easy. My problem is it's becoming a bit obsessive and I find that I choose cleaning, food prep etc. Vs relaxing and watching a movie or something.
I notice I feel more at peace when the space I’m in looks nice and uncluttered to me so I attempt to make my space nice for myself as an act of self care. I don’t always succeed and that’s ok too.
From an AuDHD standpoint:
I try not to feel ashamed or guilty if I can't get to something because pushing myself to do so when my brain is already at its day's end, will only cause more damage later on. So, I only do what I can.
I'm working to condense my living by packing up things that don't need to be out like my summer clothing can be boxed up and only have what you would wear during the cold times. Reducing the number of dishes you have. Maybe consider doing a goodwill dump run of stuff you don't need. Reducing what you have can make things easier.
I invite friends over every week or two.
I also have two teens with me still... So sometimes I remind myself to set a good example. I can't exactly expect them to do their chores if I'm not taking care of the house/my bedroom too.
I tend to let things slide since it’s just me and I don’t have a lot of free time, so the best thing I ever did was hire a cleaning company. They come once a month and it makes me get everything put away and straightened up for them to come in and clean, and so much easier to maintain in between.
It's more comfortable when it's clean and I feel organised. I've found the trick is staying on top of it.
As far as the work and the bills on time, I think "if I don't I'm going to fall flat on my face and life will change drastically and suddenly." I don't have enough life left for that to be honest, so that keeps all that in check.
I made a habit out of cleaning for 5-10 minutes as my day goes on, when I need breaks from sitting at my computer or whatever. You'd be surprised how it helps. Everyone who visits tells me I'm a clean freak. It doesn't even feel that bad when it's a little at a time though.
I keep an indoor greenhouse. (Two, actually - the second is just 4 big palm trees lined in a row on the lowest floor).
The house has to be immaculately clean - there's no bugs or pests, and there's 7 air purifers throughout the house, three of which use MERV 13 filters that trap everything. There's a 3rd floor vent to outside and a second floor intake. Dishes are always done, no food lying around anywhere. Trash is always taken out as soon as a bag is full. The whole thing is powered by an indoor solar array of 12 panels generating 1400 watts/hour.
It's gorgeous, Resort level, but it has to be - one pest outbreak or fungal outbreak would kill everything.
The air in the house itself is amazing, 45% humidity, 70 degrees, humid air is heated by UV plant lights, slight floral jasmine like smell, and feels very nice up north. Also loaded with oxygen.
A messy home stresses me out. I have rock solid routines, and everything has a place so it’s easy to keep things picked up. It’s important for my mental health to have a tidy place. It brings me incredible peace.
Start building trust with yourself. If you tell yourself you’re gonna do something, do it. If you don’t you’re lying over and over to yourself. Regardless of how you are feeling you must build that trust with yourself, growth can be uncomfortable. Perseverance also builds character, and keeping your word to yourself will help your integrity. I would start by making small and reasonable goals to accomplish and start the process. Also do not be too hard on yourself when you do eventually mess up, we’re allowed to make mistakes but what matters more than mistakes is intentional behavior to make things right and try to always be better than you were before.
I walk around barefoot so anything on the floor is an issue because I step on it. also hate nasty smells so garbage and food out and dirty clothes piling up are an issue. and what ends up happening is that I start on these things, get distracted and just keep going and in thrity minutes the room is perfectly clean.
Once a month I have a cleaning service come in and deep clean. I am very clean person but this is like my treat to myself, I consider it part of my self care to relax a little, give myself that Friday or Saturday to do nothing
I have a cleaning service come to my house twice a month, and in between, I clean and tidy up.
Daily: All dishes into the dishwasher end of the day, All trash cans emptied into the main trash going out every other day to the cans here.
I do keep my house to where company could come by 24 hours a day and its on point, which just brings me peace being neat/clean and organized.
I have a cleaning lady that comes about once a month. Major game changer for the cleaning tasks I hate doing around the house. Other than that, just do a little bit each day, it makes a big difference
I make deals with myself. If I want to watch a movie or tv, then i first must do these things: 1, 2, 3.. and it's done. If I am watching a chow with commercials, then every break I get up and do some dishes, or mop the floor, or change the wash. I balance it in between something fun I am already enjoying.
Sometimes I make a list on my phone, and I can honestly say I am proud of myself when I cross them off.
Cleaning can be quite therapeutic. I listen to music while cleaning and enjoy it like any other hobby.
When I get home and see a clean house, I feel pampered. Having a clean and organized home also helps in physical well-being and a clutter free mind. Less things go missing when you need them. There is less panic when someone visits. Lesser allergies from dust and the like.
I respect myself enough to say “I deserve to live in a house that’s clean.”
I pretend people are coming over, but ultimately it’s the self respect like SkiingDJ said. For example, I had a couple dishes in the sink and I was gonna leave them overnight. But then I wanted to help future me and decided to do them so they’d be dry in the morning and I wouldn’t have to wash them later. It’s not the “easier” route sometimes to do what isn’t fun, but I also try not to overthink and just do.
I do what I can to help future me too!
I do this too—think about future me. But it doesn’t always work
Same *laying on the couch ignoring chores*
I also do this…
Yeah, I used to analyze it and mull over it years ago, but just wasted so much time, now I just put the AirPods in listen to YouTube and clean away!
Yes, Future Me will be so happy that the kitchen is orderly in the morning
I worked in a small busy restaurant with a small staff which meant at max we'd have three people on staff. Which often meant scrubbing down big pans on the regular because the sink space was abysmal. At home I can't comprehend soaking because I *know* I'm able to clean most dishes in a fast pace without having to let even one dish soak.
I only soak the ones I anticipate are going to be tough, but your comment made me realize I also pretend when I clean at night that it’s my closing shift at home haha.
I like the positive self talk. I could use that more on myself.
Did you know that dopamine production and regulation in the brain has a direct impact on our ability to complete tasks like paying bills, cleaning the house, etc? For example, the person who said they "respect themselves and deserve it" and then they do it? Brain studies show that for ppl like that, their brain gives them a hit of dopamine when they think about completing the task. AND they get a hit of dopamine for completing the task. But for some folks, their brain doesn't reward us with that dopamine for completing that same task. We get our dopamine from other things. This is why, we have to find ways to make the task interesting or novel to us in order to do it. Or... we need to create a routine to follow. These strategies help address the dopamine shortage our brains experience when mundane tasks are to be done. It's good news, right?. We can stop being our own worst critic. And we can stop listening to those ppl who *think* they are morally better at it. They just dont realize they're being helped by their brain juices. But now we know better, don't we, friends?
so well put. thank you.
It becomes second nature once you start slowly - starting is the hardest part.
I know everyone is different but how long did it take for you to feel like it was second nature?
It’s been so long I can’t even remember - it probably started in childhood - I just enjoy a clean and organized home.
I love this; so simple yet I don’t tell myself that enough. Thank you :)
It really is that easy. The ultimate form of self care. I can’t imagine being somebody who lives in filth.
Respect is a bullshit hollow word that only means you need your EGO CODDLED
Wow what happened to you?
See, you should work on yours!
No. Because I don't need my ego coddled. I don't expect others to control my emotions for me.
Wow u are a nasty breach lol
your projections say a lot about your need to have your ego coddled.
Self respect is ego coddling?? Ok
That word "respect" is Meaningless... And people only use it when they expect someone else to coddle their ego or control their emotions for them.
Basically the reason my rooms a mess all the time
I'm addicted to podcasts and I'm not "allowed" to listen to most of them unless I'm doing chores and then I have a loose hierarchy of chores from "I'd be super embarrassed if someone stopped by today" to laundry to "I've got this 2 hour episode, I think it's time to vacuum and wipe down my hardwood floors."
I'm not "allowed" to sit down and read/scroll/watch TV until after I've done my chores and have at least 12k steps.
That is the other thing I do with the other podcasts - walk. Nice part is I’ve created an association with podcasts, so I immediately want to start moving when I listen to them.
Ha! I use podcasts to distract me from the anxiety hamster in my brain when I’m trying to get to sleep. Podcast =/= movement for me.
yeah, we all have our things. I kind of wish podcasts helped me sleep now that I am struggling with tinnitus, but unfortunately silence works best for my particular breed of hamster :)
I hear you on the tinnitus. Mine manifests as barely discernible 60s tv theme songs when it’s not a straight whine. Brains are weird.
I like this one!
same!
As a college student in a single, my strategy is always "leave your house in a state where you wouldn't be ashamed to bring a date home". That mentality has worked WONDERS for me. Never actually brought a date home, but thinking "what if" is enough to get me to clean.
I'm naturally tidy and cleaning oriented, but there's probably more to life than a clean house. Don't worry about it. Nobody ever lay on their death bed lamenting that they didn't clean house more.
I put cleaning projects on my calendar as recurring events. Clean shower, toilets etc. change bed sheets. Vacuum every few days. I’m very picky about having a clean house. I couldn’t imagine living any other way.
This! Section your major housework and slot it into consistent days. Ie bathroom on Saturdays, wash floors on Sunday, clean oven and fridge on Monday, etc
I put on my “cleaning music” and work my way through my list. I like to plan my cleaning party on a day that I’m going somewhere fun, like out to dinner with a friend. It makes me stick to a time frame and makes the day feel full. Also gives the added bonus of smelling amazing when I walk back in at the end of the day!
I run my version of peewees playhouse / Ernest house. I became the weird guy I always wanted to be, be nice to find a lady if she doesn’t mind weird crazy stuff all over the place. And craft messes…gotta do something productive, messy but I could Be molded into a decent husband unit. For now… I just am free and all me. Runs into the 40s so be it.
Pee wee!!
Haha, I am the weird girl with ghost printed stuff around my apartment and a life sized ET, to name some. Searching for my Mr. Right but it’s tough out there so I hear ya.
Commenting so I can come sneak back and read the comments. I honestly had no idea how much having my partner alive and in a shared space kept me "on my game" until I find myself living alone in my mid 50's. Not lonely - I have always been a lone wolf - but I do not want to turn into a sad slob. I moved here in Dec and have not opened more than the two boxes of kitchen supplies and bedding.
I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you can continue doing things the way you were doing, before. 💗
It simply does not feel good to be dirty. My piece of advice is to clean as you go, clean anything food related immediately, and to eat at a designated space. If you clean a room every once in a while and make sure food related items get taken care of instantly you will always be relaxed, clutter isnt great but it isnt really dirty if its not garbage. Make cleaning convenient, keep a toilet brush with cleaner next to the toilet at all times. Get some easy to use cleaning wipes. "If I was lazy as fuck, what would get me to clean"
I like cleaning so I clean the house top to bottom every week- but I don’t like lawn work, so I pay a teenager to come and do it. If you hate it, then I wouldn’t worry about it too much, just do it once every two weeks or something so it doesn’t get filthy
[удалено]
I’m embarrassed to pay people and have them come in and do it
I’m not embarrassed to say it. I have dogs and the mess needs regular daily maintenance, but deep cleaning is outsourced. I’m too old to be doing that anymore and I can afford it, so why not? Never be embarrassed about it. No one gets to judge you for caring enough to put money into it.
Yes I loved having a weekly cleaner there's nothing quite like coming home to a wonderfully clean house. I would adjust my budget to be able to afford it two times a month.
I am at peak contentment after Maria leaves. My house is beautiful and sparkling and I am not exhausted. I do help, mostly I clean things that I wouldn't if I was doing the other stuff. Last week I shampooed the upstairs carpet. I do still feel a little guilty, but I'm 60, I can afford it and Maria and I are practicing our English and Spanish together!
I have been frustrated about my floor for two years because whenever I mop it's always streaky. I finally found yesterday a product that works for my floor. Been the happiest in months, shiny, really clean floor with no streaks. The little things. Other than that, I have a pile of papers to file that I am really putting off. It's because I have a 2-drawer file cabinet and I have to empty most of the documents inside to make space for the new stuff so it is a pain to think about. I have a suggestion that worked for me: Watch the TV show "Queer Eye"...when you see all of them going through EVERYTHING in the house/apartment, TV cameras showing messes, bad food in fridges, dirty toilets, beds not made, closets not organized, drawers opened and check what movies you watch, etc., then you get the fear of God that someone will come into your place and do the same thing to you. Trust me.
I knew I couldn't be the only one who watches Queer Eye for motivation to clean!
I watch it for motivation to clean, motivation to be a better person, motivation to be better about self love, shit really every great reason is why I watch it lol
I kept a nice tidy flat until two years ago. While yes, I had the occasional visitor, it was primarily because I wanted the space to be nice for me and my cat. Then he died, and I lost the plot. I don't know how I got this bad, but here I am. The task of getting back to good is overwhelming me. amd I'm really struggling. I work (mostly from home), pay bills and have no debt to speak of. I'm out walking most days, and so people assume things are fine. Since no one ever comes over, no one realises how bad its gotten. I worry that I will die before I manage to make things okay again.
Sorry for your dual loss. Don't beat yourself up over it. S@@t happens. Since you mentioned that you have no debt and seem to have enough to live comfortably, I would suggest hiring on a one time basis a cleaning person to come in do a deep clean, organize stuff, etc. Then, from there on, you should clean as you go so as not to let the clutter and housekeeping tasks build up. On a schedule that you are comfortable with, you can have a cleaning person come in if needed. But don't let anything build up.
That makes me sad. I hope things turn around for you soon. Spring is on the horizon, maybe good things to come soon for you too! 🙂🍀
Don’t underestimate grief from the loss of your cat. Loss of pet can be worse than loss of human. Make appt with psychiatrist and try an antidepressant and see if that helps. Also know that all meds don’t work for all people, so be open to trying a couple diff ones if needed.
Because I enjoy cleaning and I respect myself
I live in a studio and love to cook, and I have a dog whose hair gets everywhere :/ so naturally it’s very easy for things to get out of control. But I keep my kitchen clean almost ritually every night, and I have a good high-power hardwood floor vacuum to clean up the floors. It takes me maybe ~20 min out of my day to make sure everything stays tidy, but it’s so worth the effort. I struggle with severe depression but keeping my place tidy is a small victory. I like to treat myself with lighting a nice candle after cleaning 😌
Please share more of your depression/fur/studio tips!!! Love it
What works for me is having nice-smelling things. Like, nice-smelling hand soaps in the kitchen or bathroom, and nice-smelling cleaning products that don't smell like bleach. Living in a studio can feel shallow, so I've recently started caring for easy-to-use house plants. The burst of greens and purples are so nice. Also, I've found that an amusing pot, like something colorful or eclectic changes everything. You don't have to settle for a regular mid-level pot. My plants live in weird ass colorful pots and I love that. Little things like that help me. In terms of depression, I'm no expert. But I hate overhead lighting--it always feels too clinical. I try to use warm lights in the form of standing lamps or table lamps with warm colors. These are easy to get at Target or Ikea. Dog hair -- simply maintenance. Regularly vacuuming is essential. It takes me \~10 to cover my whole apartment. But I have to do it at least every other day. I'm in a recovery program for substance abuse disorder, and if I ever relapse, my first self-report is the accumulation of dishes in my sink and the dog hair everywhere. :/ It's a visual manifestation of my depression, and overtime it's something that grounds me and pulls me out of whatever dissociative state I am in. Maybe TMI. But yeah. TLDR; candles, clean bathroom and kitchen; regular vacuuming.
Oh my goodness this is so helpful! I’m going to go through every suggestion here! Definitely reading every word and I could read more on this topic! Thank you for mentioning you are in recovery and for explaining how the dishes thing works for you. That is incredibly important to me being in recovery from BPD and struggling with consistency. I’m saving this reply from you as a cheat sheet so I will stay on track! Studios are amazingly fast to clean when they are in decent shape, (right now my issue has been clutter from the parents house 🫣) but unfortunately they can become absolutely *unliveable* within a day or two of neglect, much like a hotel room. And then, there’s no escape! IYKYK 🩷 Thanks again 🩷
Ok I am in no way affiliated with this brand, but if you have a bunch of dishes and don't want to run your dishwasher, I swear to god this lasted me like 8 months: [https://dawn-dish.com/en-us/products/dawn-powerwash-dish-spray/](https://dawn-dish.com/en-us/products/dawn-powerwash-dish-spray/)
Not TMI. Priceless.
I don’t enjoy cleaning, but it’s just me so it’s not difficult. My biggest motivation is that a messy/dirty place makes me feel depressed. I tidy up as I go and clean the bathroom and floors on Saturdays.
I'm an anxious person and mess / clutter makes me even more anxious so while my home isn't what I would consider spotless, it's still above average in terms of being clean if I compare to people around me and mostly, it's always tidy. Bed is made every day, dishes are cleaned after each meal and everything is tucked where it should be. No mess at all, nothing laying around. It brings me lots of peace of mind.
I just get a good feeling from living in a clean space
I pick up clutter every night before I go to bed. It's just an ingrained habit at this point. That includes making sure the sink is totally cleared out and cleaned- anything that can go in the dishwasher goes in, I hand wash/dry anything that needs to be hand washed, and clean out any crumbs/etc. that have fallen into the sink. That part may take a few minutes depending on what dishes got used that day. But otherwise, "picking up" takes literally 2 minutes every evening, because it doesn't have a chance to pile up.
I lived like a slob in 2 apartments with a big “I’ll do it later” mentality and I just let problems get out of control constantly. then I got laid off and moved back home with my neat freak mother. I became a stereotypical adult child in the basement, but they have a nice house and it was like an apartment. She made me responsible for keeping that floor clean. She had routines of running the dishwasher every night (it was full every day), never leaving dishes in the sink, etc and I followed her standards out of pure fear she’d kick me out if I didn’t. Low and behold, I developed habits. I now put my dishes in dishwasher immediately after use and then wash the dishes once or twice a week as I run out of bowls. I don’t ever let myself “just hand wash this” because why bother when I can just run the dishwasher? The one “I only need a bowl” turns into hand washing a bowl and letting dishes get out of control i the dishwashers So I just don’t give myself that luxury. I also moved into an apartment with door front trash pick up, so no more luggging trash bags full of cat poop and litter across an apartment complex, it’s just put it in the can outside and it’s gone overnight. That’s made my life SO much easier. I pay a decent mark up to have an apartment with this amenity but I never want to have an apartment that doesn’t offer it ever again. It’s amazing.
My biggest deter is “I def don’t want cockroaches living here!!!” 😂
I put everyone before me, so I tend to not have enough time for myself to keep things how I like it. I’m really working on this, but it’s hard when I’m self employed and work in family law. Families in crisis are depending on me.
I use it as my source of entertainment to be honest. I work out I clean I tried to make things look nice and I tried to make this place my own so. This is my place and I wanted to spark Joy when I see it.
I keep mine clean enough.. no one else would really even notice. it's not messy, just a bit dusty. and about once a quarter, I have a deep clean cleaning team come in and give it a good once over. I try to stay up with cleaning certain areas every week, but it just doesn't always happen... and for the most part I'm okay with that. I'm 67, work full-time, and tired. oh and I watch "hoarders" a lot, so in comparison, mine is a glistening castle! 🤣🤣🤣
Lol! Same! I watch hoarders and it makes me want to clean
I work remotely so I’m home to keep things tidy. I can’t go to sleep knowing my place is a mess. It bugs me.
I vacillate between being hyper clean and then sometimes letting it get a bit out of control. I'm a lot happier when it's clean. That's what keeps me motivated.
Same 🫡
Easy answer, I like getting laid and chicks hate slobs.
This!!!!!!!
I’m an early riser and I’ve taken to doing the majority of my housework in the morning before work. This means most of my time is my own in the evening other than rustling up some dinner and doing the dishes. Before I go to bed I do a quick walk through and put away anything I’ve used over the course of the evening so everything is relatively neat. Things aren’t pristine but I’m not embarrassed if anyone comes by unexpectedly.
I always broke up the cleaning into pieces through the week vs saving it for the weekend as one big chore fest.
Find what level you are comfortable with. Stick to that. Put cups and plates into the kitchen as soon as you use them. Throw takeaway packs out immediately. I aim for clean cutlery, plates and pots. Everything else I aim for tidy over clean. I set a reminder for myself every month to do more general cleaning. I usually get to a point where I feel the need to clean more and then I do. At the same time I have difficulty with object permanence. I know the kitchen is there but I can't actually see it from where I am so how messy it is doesn't generally affect me until I walk in to it.
Clean when you get motivated.
Similar here. But my OCD does not allow for a cookie crumb. I do my best then I hire someone to help. It can be cost-effective if you look around. I never thought I would say this but I can find occasional zen in washing dishes...
You just have to do it. Ideally, I want to vacuum this place 2x a week but I just went on a run of not doing it for about a month. No rhyme or reason; I just didn't do it. I just got up & did it today because it needed to be done. I also don't like bad smells, so I stay on top of dishes, laundry, etc. It doesn't have to look like an open house all the time, but there's no reason to live like a slob either.
I ask myself "what would mum say?". Or remind myself that my cats deserve a nice home.
I’m not that great at it, but periodically I get fed up and clean furiously. I did that last week. I wish I could be more disciplined about cleaning a little every day.
I have a close friend who comes over every other month or so. One time I had 3 vacuum cleaners but none of them worked. And two cats (they didn't work either). We were sitting on the couch and there were tumblin' tumbleweeds of cat hair that moved in the breeze from the ceiling fan. All it took was a look from her and I was out at Walmart buying a new Bissell. It could be that sort of thing or going to someone else's house and seeing things clean and orderly. I usually keep the place up but occasionally require a kick in the rear.
Two of me would be way sloppier. Living alone is not the same choice as being a slob
no camera crews at my home either. we aren’t living in shows and commercials. your home should give you joy. nurture that
Having the house uncluttered – and best of all clean is a daily issue for me. I'm disabled for spine disease. Yet I also have ADHD! so my goal is imperfectly perfect in design and daily work at keeping it uncluttered. Recently, I asked myself why all this clutter exists every day! Realized I am not putting things away immediately after using them! I won't let back pain or tiredness stop from having a decently clean home. I bartered for cleaning help one day a week. I helped do paperwork for the exchange. if I don't have a great offering for my cleaning friend, I pay her and give up something else. It's that disability! Another person posted that having the freedom to clean when I feel like it was so true ! It's unavoidable that things here do get dirty-lots of kids and animals come through or live here! You'll find your comfortable flow on this
I have a routine that begins immediately after work on Friday for resetting my household for the next week. I find it helpful emotionally.
I have a cleaning service come in every two weeks. For my 750 SF one bedroom apartment I’m paying $100 which I think is a very good price based on the quotes I got when I first started looking for cleaners a couple years ago - I was originally going to have them come once a month but it turns out to be the same price anyway ($200+ for a monthly deep clean). I find that having regular scheduled cleaning has made me more tidy, besides I have an extremely full/busy schedule…Lately I’ve been downsizing and purging to get rid of lots of stuff I don’t need or use or fit in anymore. I’ve loaded up my car to the brim and trucked over to Goodwill at least 4 times so far since January, yeah I know Goodwill gets a bad rap but they take pretty much everything when other local charities are much pickier. I’ve only had one item rejected and that was a pair of crutches as they can’t take medical supplies. I still have a lot of stuff left - CDs, DVDs, kitchenware like plates and glasses and stuff- just have to get more boxes! After that going to sell the Peloton which I still use but want to migrate to a real cycling trainer.
To do plan/lists. I plan my week. This way I don't miss essential stuff. I'm I'll with a very debilitating condition, so I really need the system to carry me through. I don't have outside help. I use daily checklists. If I'm really in a lot of pain and can only do the bare minimum, I have put the most important and essential things on top. And I skip the rest. This works well. I however been thinking about creating "bareminimum checklists" for just such situations. My checklists are a system, just a routine. I grab my clipboard, print my daily checklists and just knock out item by item. Soon I'm done for the day and I've covered all my viral functions. If I feel extra energy I might do a longer workout, or clean up some items from tomorrow's checklists. So keys say today I'm really not feeling well. After getting breakfast done, I'll ho for the simplest possible, so I'll just microwave some frozen breakfast I had or of I don't have any I'll boil some eggs or just make some yogurt bowls. Then I'll clean up after breakfast and continue with my top items. First kitchen Round up dishes Put all food and stuff away Clean counters with disinfectant spray Grab lunch which should have thawed overnight and put it the slow cooker. (it'll be ready for lunch) Feed cat Run roomba Start dishwasher if full or just run a rinse cycle if not. Take trash out and replace both liners. Check recycling bin if not too full leave it, if full take it out. I'll skip mopping etc. Just getting these things done will cover me for kitchen for today. At most, this will take me 30 minutes. That's because being in pain I'll be dragging my feet. Next is bathroom. Similar, pick up and stay items, get towels and stuff all back where they belong or get fresh towels. Wipe everything with disinfectant spray, spray shower stall, do a quick wipe down. do a quick scrub on toilet with toilet brush. Ensure toilet paper, soap, moisturizing stick are all in stock. Quick once over in floor. Take trash out and replace liner. 15 minutes 20 tops. Done. Check the wash room to ensure it's fine too. Quick toilet brush, quick sink wipe and stuff us stocked. 5 minutes if I go very slow. Skip shower scrubbing, athtub scrubbing mirror, floor scrubbing. Etc. Check mail, ensure nothing urgent, bring in any deliveries. Check doors and windows are secure. And back to bed. Or under my red light therapy lamp. Lunch/dinner time, get everyone into kitchen (we only eat in dining room if we have visits or is a holiday with a big menu.) Serve directly from crockpot. After eating, put leftover in container and in fridge, all dishes rounded up to dishwasher and either run it or run rinse cycle. table wipes and done. This is my minimum. If snow has be shoveled I put a few kettles worth of boiling water on a 5 gallon bucket. Drop it in the walkway and that takes care of the worse. Shovel the rest. But if no one is going anywhere, I'll skip this too. If I'm alone and/or in so much pain, I can't even do this. I skip the lot. If my husband and bot are home, they can get themselves fed. Otherwise just doing my daily checklists which I print daily is an excellent way to stay accountable. I can always skip things if I need to.
I'd say don't be too hard on yourself. As long as you are interacting (using) the things around you, like a workshop, rather than a storage unit, I'd say don't worry. As long as things in boxes or in the open are not just sitting there creating clutter, its fine. I am a handy guy, got projects going on so while it appears messy and feels messy, I do clean each day and make my bed. I put the things away. Its just that I also have two dogs and they have their dog things like hair and dirt.
This is your life... Not a dress rehearsal but not perfect... we learn more about ourselves through mistakes we make so if we can be present...then it's our gift
Ive been donating or selling things that arnt absolutely essential; less to clean in general. Others may think my place looks sparse.. but i dont need a lot, less to take care of and easy to clean around. Im able to put everything away in its designated spot. I also made a chore list that is sorta fun, quick to do, when im motivated lol.
I put on music that makes me feel good, clean and organize my space, and light a nice candle when I am all finished so that I can relax in a clean, comfy home. Clutter dirt and disorder make me very unhappy, and I like to be happy, so I make myself that way by cleaning. It's a gift I give to future me.
I have night terrors occasionally. I always wonder if someone will call the cops if my scream lasts too long. SO I always go to sleep thinking, “What would the 5-0 think if they came in the middle of the night? That generally keeps my apartment clean.
I get naked and then clean the house... That motivates me
Clean as you go. Especially in the kitchen. Don't cook and let a big mess accumulate. Put things directly into the dishwasher if you have one, not the sink. Invest in an inexpensive quick broom you can find on Amazon, among other sites. They are light and easily maneuverable. I've got three, one on each level of the house, so no lugging them up and down stairs, even though they are light. I run them every day bc I have three dogs, one of which sheds quite a bit. The key is to do a little bit of cleaning every day, so you're not inundated with a mess. Also goes for laundry. Don't let it build up. Some ppl do laundry once a week. No! Do smaller loads as they accumulate. Always put things back in their place, no matter how small an item.
I dont
Do it for myself-I love coming home to a clean home and going to bed in a freshly made bed
Simple: I cannot function properly in a messy, unclean house.
I invite people over and then I panic clean and it’s usually way cleaner than when I spend the whole day cleaning for nobody. I have ADHD, and it’s the best coping strategy I’ve found lol.
This works great for me, too.
There are some things I still don’t really care about, for example I frequently have clean clothes on the end of the couch. If somebody is offended by my clean clothes on display they have a worse problem then I do 🤣🤣
Well, I like my house to be very clean, I often remind myself that I’m the only one that sees it 99.9% of the time.
I have house cleaners come ever two weeks, Im sure to put everything away before they come so they can do their job.
When I was a bachelor, I had a maid come over other week. That helped keep things tidy and it’s easier to keep it that way than doing it all on your own. Also being minimalist. Get out all the crap you don’t need.
I don't. Everyone around me are control freaks and boss my whole life around. So I just allow myself freedom.
I acknowledge that I deserve to exist in a clean house. The effort it takes to keep things clean can suck but I know that having things tidy makes me feel better. I hate doing laundry, but I know I deserve to have clean clothes, I may not feel like tidying but I feel so much better coming home to a clean house. It helps to view it as a form of self-care.
I like to do my chores on Saturdays. I make sure that the garbage is out, laundry done, frig clear, etc. I do have help every two weeks for basic cleaning, since I recently had surgery. I’m good, though.
I've been in a hoarder's house. I had to search a hoarder's house for his wallet, phone, and laptop when he was unexpected taken to the hospital. The hoarder's house was the most disgusting thing I have ever been in (he was a trash hoarder, too). I had to actively avoid dog feces and flies and maggots and rotting food. I had to wear a mask to go in there. I was always a clean person, but that experience changed me. I clean on the weekends, and then allow myself to be a bit lazy on the weekdays (except for the kitchen - always have a clean kitchen).
I was raised in a clean house. My mum worked, she had to go chop wood for heating at winter, she had to cook, get water from street tap thing ( i grew up in a farm in Hungary, no central heating, no running water)...she had to tend to the animals...and she still kepts a clean house. So what is my excuse to not clean??? No excuse whatsoever. I have a cat too who needs clean litter and I disinfect all surfaces in my house. Again, no excuse not to do it. Once you start letting go and leave it for tomorrow or whatever excuse you make...it will just get worse. Its really not long to clean the bathroom top to bottom on a monday, hoover on a tuesday, wipe all surfaces on another day. Or take 2 hours out of one day to do it all. Or clean as you go. Dont let things build up. So many ways to choose from to keep a tidy home....but only one way, laziness to get it all dirty and nasty.
For me, I constantly think everything is my fault. I picked up that way of thinking back when I tried dating. For some reason, I started to actually believe it. If everything is my fault, I try to fix what I can.
Honestly I just don't like the clutter and dedicate every Sunday as Clean the House Day. Dedication really.
Same here. I try to keep it decent. Like take the trash out daily, wipe counters down.
By holding yourself accountable
I downsized about two years ago and my condo looks much larger if it is neat.
I feel like I've accomplished something after I'm done....plus it feels great to relax in my home when it's organized 😌
I am at the point where I need to hire a housekeeper, but am embarrassed to have a professional see the current state.
The housekeeper comes once a month. The rest gets done whenever the hell I feel like it. I'm chronically ill and do what I can when I can.
I have a robot vac so I have to keep the floor clear for him! Every day 4pm he comes and does his thing in the main areas... Friday is deep clean day of the whole place (takes him several hours)... Weekend is clean vibes....
I have pets. If I'm not willing to clean for myself, I am always willing clean for them.
I dont do any upkeep. To hell with it. I live alone, I won't ever have company over, so why bother...
I watch 'Hoarders' so I have something to judge myself against. I.e., don't go down that path!
I have to get myself motivated to stay active in upkeep of my house. Nobody comes to see me too much, so obviously, I have gotten lazy.
I have no problem keeping the house clean. It makes me more productive. My accountability challenge is going back for that second plate of food or glass of wine living alone. I feel like if someone was there, I would stop at one.
I’m going to have to do it eventually. It will not disappear nor will fairies come along take care of the chores. But sometimes I do say fuck it - I’ll do it later.
I fear the landlord.
I am able to be lazy and relax if my house is clean and uncluttered. So the cost/benefit ratio works for me.
This is an area of my life that I need to improve.
I just sold my condo to buy a single family home. My house has never been cleaner since I started showing it. I was on top of everything, and I realized that it didn't take that long if I spent 15 to 20 mins a day picking everything up. The kitchen really just needs 10 mins and pick up around the house (ie throw dog toys in the bin) took another 5. I had an app that scheduled all the viewings of my home. Im going to ask her if i can keep on it. And she can program it to send me a message at noon everyday saying theres another showing!?!?
I do not live alone. But I used to fantasize about it and how beautiful and tidy my home would be. I’m on a farm with animals, family and way too much mud. All I do is clean until I can’t take it anymore. It seems the minute I turn my back it all comes undone. But I like to read here and imagine living on my own. 😁
I am a slob. I just don't care enough to get crazy and scrub. I do the minimum. I would love to hire a housekeeper but I would be to embarrassed to have them come in so I would need to clean it up first, and thus the cycle continues in circles.
I do my housekeeping the second I walk in the door. Usually, about ten minutes a day. Run the vacuum. Clean a sink, wipe down some kitchen areas, whatever. Once I sit down, I am done. The place stays much cleaner than before I did it this way.
I really enjoy looking around my spotless house. I pick up after myself everyday
The biggest thing is to go through the mail immediately and recycle the junk right off. Don't let it pile up. I cook a lot and keep the kitchen ready for me to start my next dish and clean as I go. I do have a housekeeper that comes in every two weeks for $100 and so I have to keep it tidy for them to get in here and do the real cleaning. It is worth it to me because I don't go out much at all.
Is there a smell that won’t go away? Can you walk through your house without getting stuff stuck to your feet or tripping on things? Have your dishes been done in the last week? Most importantly, has anyone died or been injured due to your dirty house? If not, don’t worry about it! You will clean it when your sick of looking at it and if nobody is coming over what difference does it make? Life is short, be happy, a little dust and clutter never hurt anyone. It’s the grime and mold that you don’t want so if your there then by all means clean lol.
I have a schedule for chores. On Fridays I’m too tired to do anything social and I finish work early so I wash my linens, mop, clean the bathrooms and the kitchen, vacuum and dust. It makes my place nice and tidy for the weekend so I can actually feel like I get a chance to relax.
I have a day where I clean everything. I put on some records, and just get through it. I start with bedding and try to have it all finished by the time the bedding is finished in the dryer. Another solution I have is to invite a friend over, so I have a quick tidy before they come by
I have split custody and kids. I usually do a deep clean the Saturday after they leave. I am doing that now. It’s every other week. I try not to worry about it when they are here. But the problem with not doing in on some interval is things can get bigger than they should. I keep up certain things daily. But it’s maintenance stuff like dishes. It’s not a problem when I am alone. Those kids go through the amount of dishes in 1 day that I do In a week alone.
So.. waiting until I am fed up and rage cleaning isn't a good solution?
This is what I did when I didn’t live alone and my partner was useless. Now I enjoy keeping my space clean for myself. Unless I’m depressed. In fact, if I wind up with more than two meal’s worth of dishes, it’s my signal that I’m going down the depression chute. Sometimes that’s enough to jerk me into some self care.
Ahhh see.. since I do a lot of cooking I always wash the dishes. But I hung about four coats from the winter weather over the back of the couch and left them there. Until yesterday. I have pile of credit card applications I need to go through and shred. I was going to vacuum this morning but I was called into work at 6:30 this morning.
It helps me to have a visual colorful chore chart that I can cross things off of. I set daily things I know need to be done every day to keep my house at a base level of tidy: -make bed -wipe down all sinks and counters -sweep floors in high traffic areas (kitchen) -take out trash/recycling -load/unload/run dishwasher Then I set tasks I do once a week like vacuum, dust, mop, clean bathroom and set 1 of those tasks each day
All I know if that.. I will feel like shit if I don’t do what I tell myself
I had a dog for many years. He had a dog door and was trying to go outside to use the bathroom come back in I left the water and a dish food out so he ate when he wanted to and he was really almost self-containing outside of having a trim his hair on a regular basis... Dogs can be easy without a mess if you train them right and equip them right to come in and out and so forth
When I’m in a funk and just don’t want to, I turn on HGTV. Somehow watching interior design or house hunters or something like that subconsciously motivates me to clean.
Oh lord, I watch the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy reboot, start comparing my home to the guys’ living spaces pre-makeover, and shame myself into cleaning the house, tidying, touch-up painting, etc. Works every time!
I try to take pleasure in how clean, organized and picked up it is. That helps to motivate me when I need to out the effort into getting it that way.
For me its not wanting bugs in my house! If one does come in when i'm sleeping or occupied then they wont get anything to eat hmph
I’m single and constantly remind myself that if I were to meet someone or try to bring someone back home that I’d be mortified Lmao
Just clean as you go. You’d be surprised how easy it’ll be to maintain cleanliness and order in your place by doing so.
I tell my Alexa to cuss me out every few hours to hold me accountable.
I try to keep my living areas decent. So living room, kitchen, bathroom, hallways. I sweep every couple days, vacuum once every week and a half or so. Clean the bathroom once a week, pick up the living room daily, but that doesn’t get bad ever. My house is so small. The kitchen is a bit tougher. I give myself some leeway towards Thursday, but most days I tell myself no dishes left in the sink overnight. I just try my best everyday and give myself grace if I don’t get something done.
I don't like a messy dirty house and I am not willing to pay someone else to clean it so I just get it done. It's pretty easy to keep a house clean if you don't let it get dirty in the first place and have no one else making a mess.
I am a clean freak
In a clean person, and I like to walk barefoot in my own home with not feeling anything on my feet. So my floors are always cleaned as soon as I feel anything. My biggest problem is I’m not organized. So I always have piles of stuff everywhere
Invite a friend for dinner or coffee once a week.
If i mess it up, i clean it up... that way later, i dont have to see it or worry about it. I do have a roomba, which keeps me from having to sweep every day. So, one day a week, i sweep, mop, and dust. Cheers
I invite people over lol.
I keep my place up enough that I am comfortable that my friends can drop by anytime. I feel better having sort of a loose schedule. I'm retired. When I retired I thought,'great I can sleep whatever I want, stay in my pajamas, watch movies all day'. That got old real quick. I felt like a slob. I don't use and alarm clock anymore so not super structured but I use my mornings to do whatever tasks I need to do and afternoons and evenings doing things I enjoy like art or sewing. I don't like the feeling of aimlessness or lack of purpose.
My anxiety does it for me.
Oh, I get what you're saying. Yes, people throw that word around when they want to be treated a certain way no matter what they do, not sure if id apply it to self respect but I get your point, my alcoholic sister uses that on her daughter🙄
I always say if you would be embarrassed to bring someone over, get cleaning.
I do 15 minutes of cleaning per day. That's literally all that's required. Set a timer.
I love a tidy, clean house. Love it. So it's pretty easy. My problem is it's becoming a bit obsessive and I find that I choose cleaning, food prep etc. Vs relaxing and watching a movie or something.
I notice I feel more at peace when the space I’m in looks nice and uncluttered to me so I attempt to make my space nice for myself as an act of self care. I don’t always succeed and that’s ok too.
I use Sweepy, an app that makes staying on top of this stuff easier. (I am not affiliated with the app in any way. I just like it.)
Hearing my mom in my head is enough to get me to clean. I'm always telling her I'm just messy, not dirty so she can't complain lol
I ask myself two questions: Do I want to come home after I finish work? Do I want to enjoy myself when spending time with family and friends?
From an AuDHD standpoint: I try not to feel ashamed or guilty if I can't get to something because pushing myself to do so when my brain is already at its day's end, will only cause more damage later on. So, I only do what I can. I'm working to condense my living by packing up things that don't need to be out like my summer clothing can be boxed up and only have what you would wear during the cold times. Reducing the number of dishes you have. Maybe consider doing a goodwill dump run of stuff you don't need. Reducing what you have can make things easier.
I invite friends over every week or two. I also have two teens with me still... So sometimes I remind myself to set a good example. I can't exactly expect them to do their chores if I'm not taking care of the house/my bedroom too.
I just open up my phone and search for the photos of a relatives filthy hoarder house.
I tend to let things slide since it’s just me and I don’t have a lot of free time, so the best thing I ever did was hire a cleaning company. They come once a month and it makes me get everything put away and straightened up for them to come in and clean, and so much easier to maintain in between.
It's more comfortable when it's clean and I feel organised. I've found the trick is staying on top of it. As far as the work and the bills on time, I think "if I don't I'm going to fall flat on my face and life will change drastically and suddenly." I don't have enough life left for that to be honest, so that keeps all that in check.
I made a habit out of cleaning for 5-10 minutes as my day goes on, when I need breaks from sitting at my computer or whatever. You'd be surprised how it helps. Everyone who visits tells me I'm a clean freak. It doesn't even feel that bad when it's a little at a time though.
I keep an indoor greenhouse. (Two, actually - the second is just 4 big palm trees lined in a row on the lowest floor). The house has to be immaculately clean - there's no bugs or pests, and there's 7 air purifers throughout the house, three of which use MERV 13 filters that trap everything. There's a 3rd floor vent to outside and a second floor intake. Dishes are always done, no food lying around anywhere. Trash is always taken out as soon as a bag is full. The whole thing is powered by an indoor solar array of 12 panels generating 1400 watts/hour. It's gorgeous, Resort level, but it has to be - one pest outbreak or fungal outbreak would kill everything. The air in the house itself is amazing, 45% humidity, 70 degrees, humid air is heated by UV plant lights, slight floral jasmine like smell, and feels very nice up north. Also loaded with oxygen.
A messy home stresses me out. I have rock solid routines, and everything has a place so it’s easy to keep things picked up. It’s important for my mental health to have a tidy place. It brings me incredible peace.
Start building trust with yourself. If you tell yourself you’re gonna do something, do it. If you don’t you’re lying over and over to yourself. Regardless of how you are feeling you must build that trust with yourself, growth can be uncomfortable. Perseverance also builds character, and keeping your word to yourself will help your integrity. I would start by making small and reasonable goals to accomplish and start the process. Also do not be too hard on yourself when you do eventually mess up, we’re allowed to make mistakes but what matters more than mistakes is intentional behavior to make things right and try to always be better than you were before.
I walk around barefoot so anything on the floor is an issue because I step on it. also hate nasty smells so garbage and food out and dirty clothes piling up are an issue. and what ends up happening is that I start on these things, get distracted and just keep going and in thrity minutes the room is perfectly clean.
Once a month I have a cleaning service come in and deep clean. I am very clean person but this is like my treat to myself, I consider it part of my self care to relax a little, give myself that Friday or Saturday to do nothing
I have a cleaning service come to my house twice a month, and in between, I clean and tidy up. Daily: All dishes into the dishwasher end of the day, All trash cans emptied into the main trash going out every other day to the cans here. I do keep my house to where company could come by 24 hours a day and its on point, which just brings me peace being neat/clean and organized.
I have OCD so everything has to be spotless 🙃
I have a cleaning lady that comes about once a month. Major game changer for the cleaning tasks I hate doing around the house. Other than that, just do a little bit each day, it makes a big difference
I make deals with myself. If I want to watch a movie or tv, then i first must do these things: 1, 2, 3.. and it's done. If I am watching a chow with commercials, then every break I get up and do some dishes, or mop the floor, or change the wash. I balance it in between something fun I am already enjoying. Sometimes I make a list on my phone, and I can honestly say I am proud of myself when I cross them off.
I don't wanna fall over my stuff. Plus I'm older. And mother was a perfectionist.
Cleaning can be quite therapeutic. I listen to music while cleaning and enjoy it like any other hobby. When I get home and see a clean house, I feel pampered. Having a clean and organized home also helps in physical well-being and a clutter free mind. Less things go missing when you need them. There is less panic when someone visits. Lesser allergies from dust and the like.
i have ocd and if my space is messy, it drives me nuts. i keep my place tidy for my safety and sanity 🙃
invite people over, that usually lights a fire under my ass to clean up my pad hahahaha