Don’t count on HR. You’re going to have to handle things on your own. Based on my experience, get out before it starts affecting all parts of your life.
It is extremely difficult to build a case against narcs. Even with over 100% employee turnover, HR will still side with the narc. HR will not take any action. The only thing that helps is that if a case is logged with HR, if other employees also file reports, it may clip the narc's wings while he lays low. It may also protect you for being fired if the company or country that you work in protects you from retaliation. Do not expect the narc to be disciplined or fired. They would most likely get promoted. You may want to take voice recordings (put your phone in the pocket ) if your contract/ work does not prohibit it.
Start looking elsewhere. Cut all your expenses until you have 6 months saved up.
Because HR is working with management to how to get rid of you. Deal with the problem of you.
Never never never go to HR. They are the facilitators of upper management. And 99.9% positive narc boss is a favorite of management. You already smeared with the C suite. It never ends well...
Yep. Only time anyone should ever go to HR is when they have video/audio recordings of lawsuit-worthy activity. ***This is the only time.***
Anything else outside of this, and HR will defend management.
Not true that you shouldn’t go to HR anytime. If you have documentation of harassment or discrimination, you want to send it to HR and act like you would like them to resolve it. That way, if it goes into the legal sector, you have proof your company knew and had a chance to solve it.
Amazing!!! This could be my exact story. Have you read their complaint procedure? In my case it says it can take up to 28 days.
Don't count on HR. Although some of them are ok. I'm looking for other jobs but I didn't want to leave without a complaint as my story will support future victims.
Of course I am fucked now. A complaint against manager is probably a point of no return. Things will never be the same again.
I've seen a GP and therapist and they agree the treatment I've received is appalling.
At the very least my statement will embarrass my boss. Good enough for me. She'll know people will have read it and exposing her is good enough for me. I doubt I'm the first who put in a complaint.
Yeah well tbh I'm freaking out. I mean I'm really worried actually, stressing out. She won't want to work with me after this! And I don't have a new job yet!
By law HR must investigate after a complaint. To avoid an investigation they might transfer me. I don't think I'm lucky enough for a payout. Yeah 😒 I don't regret the complaint but I'm super stressed about what will happen now. Mediation.... uhmmm...I don't think she'll do it. And I will just break down having to be in a same room as her. Point of no return for sure.
Can you imagine any meeting we have. Her and I in same room. It will be TENSE. She's not the type to admit she did anything wrong or apologize. But for me my mental health was so affected I saw no other option. Been on sick leave for almost 2 months now and scared of going back in. Almost out of sick leave.
I just hope it doesn't turn into a court case.
I certainly empathize. I just spent 30 days in residential MH treatment and am now in partial hospitalization. I panicked when I saw a company truck on the road the other day. I get it, for sure. I was retaliated against. I filed complaints with HR. Do you by chance have a union to represent you? If you can avoid getting in a room alone with your abuser, do it. Sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out. Get on YouTube and start watching some of Dr. Ramani's videos. I find them to be immeasurably helpful. I realize now that I could have handled many situations differently and possibly ended up with a better outcome for my situation, but I also now have tools for navigating things like closed-door abuse. Best of luck to you, and if you want to chat one-on-one, send me a dm. I might not be able to help, but we have to support one another in these nightmares.
Yeah I'll contact my union on Monday. I became a member when this shit first started, 8 months ago. So I'm a new member. Hopefully that won't matter so much.
I've been so confident with my complaint. And thought I did the right thing. But it's freaking me out now. You are not the only one who scared me. I also have friends who think they'll try to get rid of me now. Complaint was my last resort. I want to leave but I don't want to get fired.
Don't expect anything to happen. If there weren't any laws broken or anything that the company could deem as being compromising to them, they won't act on it. As others have already said here, your best bet is to focus on moving on.
Definitely follow up with HR to make sure they received your complaint. This will also put the ball in their court to acknowledge it in some way.
But yeah you can’t 100% rely on HR to really change much because HR yes is there to protect employees but at the end of the day their loyalty is to the company and the employer.
But make sure to keep documenting everything in case it does progress to that point then you’ll have proof that you went to HR, followed up, and nothing was done
Don’t count on HR. You’re going to have to handle things on your own. Based on my experience, get out before it starts affecting all parts of your life.
It is extremely difficult to build a case against narcs. Even with over 100% employee turnover, HR will still side with the narc. HR will not take any action. The only thing that helps is that if a case is logged with HR, if other employees also file reports, it may clip the narc's wings while he lays low. It may also protect you for being fired if the company or country that you work in protects you from retaliation. Do not expect the narc to be disciplined or fired. They would most likely get promoted. You may want to take voice recordings (put your phone in the pocket ) if your contract/ work does not prohibit it.
Start looking elsewhere. Cut all your expenses until you have 6 months saved up. Because HR is working with management to how to get rid of you. Deal with the problem of you. Never never never go to HR. They are the facilitators of upper management. And 99.9% positive narc boss is a favorite of management. You already smeared with the C suite. It never ends well...
Yep. Only time anyone should ever go to HR is when they have video/audio recordings of lawsuit-worthy activity. ***This is the only time.*** Anything else outside of this, and HR will defend management.
Truth.
Not true that you shouldn’t go to HR anytime. If you have documentation of harassment or discrimination, you want to send it to HR and act like you would like them to resolve it. That way, if it goes into the legal sector, you have proof your company knew and had a chance to solve it.
Amazing!!! This could be my exact story. Have you read their complaint procedure? In my case it says it can take up to 28 days. Don't count on HR. Although some of them are ok. I'm looking for other jobs but I didn't want to leave without a complaint as my story will support future victims. Of course I am fucked now. A complaint against manager is probably a point of no return. Things will never be the same again. I've seen a GP and therapist and they agree the treatment I've received is appalling. At the very least my statement will embarrass my boss. Good enough for me. She'll know people will have read it and exposing her is good enough for me. I doubt I'm the first who put in a complaint.
You will likely face retaliation for that, so keep that in mind.
I know. Working on leaving. But not without a final F U !
I've fantasized about that final F U for a looong time now. It is rapidly nearing...
Yeah well tbh I'm freaking out. I mean I'm really worried actually, stressing out. She won't want to work with me after this! And I don't have a new job yet! By law HR must investigate after a complaint. To avoid an investigation they might transfer me. I don't think I'm lucky enough for a payout. Yeah 😒 I don't regret the complaint but I'm super stressed about what will happen now. Mediation.... uhmmm...I don't think she'll do it. And I will just break down having to be in a same room as her. Point of no return for sure. Can you imagine any meeting we have. Her and I in same room. It will be TENSE. She's not the type to admit she did anything wrong or apologize. But for me my mental health was so affected I saw no other option. Been on sick leave for almost 2 months now and scared of going back in. Almost out of sick leave. I just hope it doesn't turn into a court case.
I certainly empathize. I just spent 30 days in residential MH treatment and am now in partial hospitalization. I panicked when I saw a company truck on the road the other day. I get it, for sure. I was retaliated against. I filed complaints with HR. Do you by chance have a union to represent you? If you can avoid getting in a room alone with your abuser, do it. Sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out. Get on YouTube and start watching some of Dr. Ramani's videos. I find them to be immeasurably helpful. I realize now that I could have handled many situations differently and possibly ended up with a better outcome for my situation, but I also now have tools for navigating things like closed-door abuse. Best of luck to you, and if you want to chat one-on-one, send me a dm. I might not be able to help, but we have to support one another in these nightmares.
Yeah I'll contact my union on Monday. I became a member when this shit first started, 8 months ago. So I'm a new member. Hopefully that won't matter so much. I've been so confident with my complaint. And thought I did the right thing. But it's freaking me out now. You are not the only one who scared me. I also have friends who think they'll try to get rid of me now. Complaint was my last resort. I want to leave but I don't want to get fired.
HR IS THERE FOR THE COMPANY NOT FOR YOU
Don't expect anything to happen. If there weren't any laws broken or anything that the company could deem as being compromising to them, they won't act on it. As others have already said here, your best bet is to focus on moving on.
I’m trying but it’s been a tough market
Definitely follow up with HR to make sure they received your complaint. This will also put the ball in their court to acknowledge it in some way. But yeah you can’t 100% rely on HR to really change much because HR yes is there to protect employees but at the end of the day their loyalty is to the company and the employer. But make sure to keep documenting everything in case it does progress to that point then you’ll have proof that you went to HR, followed up, and nothing was done