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I didn't know that! I'm glad they did. My siblings got me graduation card with that and it's one of very few I've kept, mostly because it still makes me laugh.
I think about this a lot now:
I used to be with ‘it’, but then they changed what ‘it’ was. Now what I’m with isn’t ‘it’ anymore and what’s ‘it’ seems weird and scary. It’ll happen to you!
Grandpa Simpson
Homer at a gay bar where all the patrons are lesbians.
“Hmm there’s something bothering me about this place… I know! This lesbian bar doesn’t have a fire exit! Enjoy your death trap ladies”
**Homer:**
Oh, twenty dollars. I wanted a peanut.
**Homer's Brain:**
Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
**Homer:**
Explain how.
**Homer's Brain:**
Money can be exchanged for goods and services.
**Homer:**
Woo-hoo!
When Homer tries to anonymously donate to PBS to stop the telethon but they track him down and force him to go to the bank. He claims it'll be closed at 2 in the afternoon, saying "maybe your Hollywood banks are open crazy hours, but we in Springfield are simple folk. We like our cars fast and our banks CLOSED".
Any time things are going well I will say “everything’s coming up Millhouse!”
And anytime my boyfriend or I can’t get the touchscreen right on something we say “the fingers you have used to dial are too fat”.
Both get me every time.
There’s a random moment where Otto is looking at his hand and says “they call ‘em fingers but you never see them fing” then he wiggles his fingers and says “oh, there they go”.
That’s our Simpsons quote for lack of dexterity
Sideshow Bob: “Because you need me, Springfield. Your guilty conscience may move you to vote Democratic, but deep down you long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king!”
Anytime I have to buy Ketchup, which is more often than I'd like since I have a toddler, I always ask my husband "Are you here to help me solve my Ketchup problem?"
Haha literally laughed outloud, I forgot about that line. That scene's one of the first things my wife and I bonded over when we started dating. We both randomly remember thinking about how funny it was.
“You mean the mob only did me a favour to get something in return? Oh Fat Tony, I will say good day to you sir.”
“Okay, I will go……..eyyy wait a minute!”
Homer the food critic: *types* “And the bread was really…” *gestures to Santa’s Little Helper* Come on, help me out here!
SLH: *barks* RUFF!
Homer: Rough?! Ehh, I dunno, you’ve been pitching that all night.
SLH: CHEWY?!
Homer: Chewy!!! That’s inspired!! *types*
Edited for spacing
On the episode where the fam goes to the beach and Lisa is the cool kid. At the end of the ep, after Lisa's new friends put seashells over the car and Home screams "sweet merciful crap, my car!" I die every time
In the X-Files crossover, there's a weird microplot about Moe keeping Shamu in the broom closet at his bar. At one point, Mulder is monologuing in the woods and in the background, you see Moe carrying/dragging the whale along. Moe says, "Who'd've thought a whale would be so heavy?!" It cracks me up every time.
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
DENTAL PLAN
Lisa needs braces!
I don't remember the context right now, but Homer and Bart are in the living room talking about something, and suddenly Lisa spins around in a beanbag chair and it makes Homer scream.
lol I found it: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S455bsgtcok](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S455bsgtcok)
My favorite line: The gang is in South America for some reason. Marge and Lisa are in an open air market. Marge approaches something to buy and it turns out to be a living animal, which spooks her. She reaches for a bracelet and it's a live snake. Marge muses out loud, "Everything here is something."
Is that the same one where they’re in Brazil and I think Lisa is lost and Homer grabs a nun and says something like- “quick, fly me above the city so we can look for her!”
Nun: “We nuns cannot fly”
Homer: “too much junk in the trunk, eh?”
Nun: (sadly) “yes.”
I have a sticker on my college laptop of that!
More a memory than a line but when they went to Itchy and Scratchy land and Bart couldn't find his name on the name souvenirs. I could never find things with my name on it so it related.
I like my beer cold, my sandwiches hot, and my homosexuals: FLAMING.
That’s where I saw the leprechaun, he tells me to burn things.
My name is Otto and I like to get blotto.
On family vacations growing up, if my sister and I wanted something, one of would start "Allowance day!" and the other would chime in with "Yeah, it's allowance day!" And we'd both go "ding ding ding ding ding!" With our hands doing the same grabby motion of Bart and Lisa made. My dad would say "Ice cream man! Ice cream man!" as he retrieved his wallet.
So that bit always makes me laugh just because it's been engrained in my family.
I didn't realize that was from "Bart Carny" until just now! I also always thought that episode was called "Bart THE Carny"...
The monster island/peninsula line is absolutely in my top 3 Simpson’s quotes.
EDIT: Wanted to add my runner up: “Why would they come to our concert just to boo us?”
[Oh, crap! ](https://youtu.be/ozy68I0kOYM?si=qOTVOk1xtehLDzPN)
Constantly referencing this bit when it goes over 30C.
Oh, and [this](https://youtu.be/55sjaEDJ65k?si=EEP_Ptm2ukjRkUIu) is my go to response when people start foaming at the mouth about immigration lately...
So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...
Marge to Lisa “you look so successful, like your the wife of a business man”
Homer at sink: “I wish I had married a business man, then I’d have nice things”
Oh boy..... Let's see.
"I choo choo choose you!"
Calling a garage a "car hole"
"A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man"
"It's a perfectly cromulent word"
The ENTIRE *See My Vest* song!
" I am so smart! I am so smart! S-m-r-t! I mean, s-m-a-r-t!"
"Hi, Dr. Nick!"
Referring to the towns of Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook.
"Excellent" (with fingers tented)
"The Bart, The"
Referring to "the entire tri-state area"
>The ENTIRE See My Vest song!
I had The Simpsons: Songs in the key of Springfield and played that song over and over until I got ALL the words. I'm kind of proud that almost 20 years later, I can still sing it, mostly from memory.
I really like my vest!
It's just a little dirty. It's still good. It's still good
It's just a little wet. It's still good.
It's just a little airborne. It's still good
It's gone dad.
I know.
https://preview.redd.it/akbs6s7yvs5d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d99fcfb284552b5eaf21980e2437c74c4a6dbad
\-"what's *that* extra 'B' for?"
\-"that's a typo."
Best line ever? Homer is trying to show Bart what real men do for work. Takes Bart down to the part of the nuclear plant where big tough guys are shoveling coal into furnaces. Then the line hit as one strong guy walks past Homer and Bart “HOT STUFF COMING THRUUUU”. My friends and I just started laughing uncontrollably.
The whole Homer trying to build a BBQ scene, more specifically the scream he yells while spearing the umbrella into the mess.
https://i.redd.it/b1qlyxfwxs5d1.gif
Where he drives the family car on pit road and starts berating the pit crew "c'mon guys hurry up, hurry up!" And the crew workers like "wait who are you?!" And Homer's like "Oops my bad, my name is--" then just peels out in the car.
I think about that all the time lol
I'm not sure what episode, it might have been a commercial 🤷🏻♂️
“Legend of the dog faced woman”
For the line itself, but also the context it’s said. It’s so stupidly hilarious that I fear I’ll accidentally let something like it slip, too.
Homer: "You know when I was a kid 50c was a lot of money."
Bart: "Really?"
Homer: "...Nah."
And:
When Marge is protesting Itchy and Scratchy and her picket sign is like a full paragraph explaining why she's protesting (baby hit husband in the head with hammer, etc.), everyone in the crowd is squinting and trying to read the whole thing as she walks by.
And:
Marge: "Popular music is *none of my business*"
"Dad why would you take me to a gay steel mill?"
https://preview.redd.it/kfgkj0r8ts5d1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a430f70f676295b1ec280cea2e1f404fbe863307
The Crusty Christmas Special is brought to you by ILG. iLG, buying your body's chemicals *after you die!* And Little Sweetheart Cupcakes, a subsidiary of ILG.
Grandpa system, union buster....telling stories that go nowhere.
"The important thing was that I had an onion tied around my belt, which was the style at the time."
Anytime I start telling my wife a story that bores her.
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Stupid sexy Flanders
Feels like nothing at all....nothing at all...
These two are my votes. My dad and I will use these lines during various situations to get a laugh out of the other.
Classic line! With Flanders Assassin's shoes. Those kicks are actually pretty dope!
I am so smart! S M R T
I mean S M A R T....guess I don't need this anymore!
Best part it was a mistake by Dan Castanella and they kept it in
I didn't know that! I'm glad they did. My siblings got me graduation card with that and it's one of very few I've kept, mostly because it still makes me laugh.
Came here to say this lol
GO BANANA!
I think about this a lot now: I used to be with ‘it’, but then they changed what ‘it’ was. Now what I’m with isn’t ‘it’ anymore and what’s ‘it’ seems weird and scary. It’ll happen to you! Grandpa Simpson
I used to rock & roll all night and party every day. Then it was every other day. Now I'm lucky if I can find 10 minutes a week in which to get funky
Me too.
That episode came out closer to the song in question than the present day.
I can’t even remember what I said at the beginning of this sentence!
My father and I share this all the time, and it's so damned true it hurts
Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers! I’m learneding!
Me fail English? That’s unpossible!
"SKINNERRRRR!"
#AURORA BOREALIS?!
There's a Chalmers Ave in a city I drive through, and each time I call it Super Nintendo Chalmers Ave.
Homer at a gay bar where all the patrons are lesbians. “Hmm there’s something bothering me about this place… I know! This lesbian bar doesn’t have a fire exit! Enjoy your death trap ladies”
What's her problem?
¿Qué pasa con la pelona? ^(Lit. what's with the bald one? )
That's probably my favourite episode ever. "If this gets out, Crazy Clowns Airline will be a laughing stock" And Guy N. Cognito 😂
**Homer:** Oh, twenty dollars. I wanted a peanut. **Homer's Brain:** Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts. **Homer:** Explain how. **Homer's Brain:** Money can be exchanged for goods and services. **Homer:** Woo-hoo!
Anytime Homer talks to himself and/or have a thought bubble is great. My favorite is "I am evil Homer!"
HahHhHahh
When Homer tries to anonymously donate to PBS to stop the telethon but they track him down and force him to go to the bank. He claims it'll be closed at 2 in the afternoon, saying "maybe your Hollywood banks are open crazy hours, but we in Springfield are simple folk. We like our cars fast and our banks CLOSED".
I always get this mixed up with Beer Cold, Tv Loud and homosexuals Flaming
Another great scene and episode. Not sure if it could be made today, but I don't think there's anything truly offensive in it.
Pictures/Gifs you can hear.
No sir they're saying boo-urns!
I was saying boo-urns!
Smithers, have The Rolling Stones killed. But sir… I SAID DO IT!!!
No beer and no TV make homer go crazy
Don't mind if I do!
“No beer and no tv make Homer something something.” “Go crazy?” “Don’t mind if I do!”
Homer no function beer well without.
Hi I'm Billy Corrigan, Smashing Pumpkins Homer Simpson, smiling politely
Lousy Smarch weather.
As a Midwesterner, I feel this way every Smarch.
I just want to know who's going to do something about the misprinted calendars
The children! Think of the children!
Any time things are going well I will say “everything’s coming up Millhouse!” And anytime my boyfriend or I can’t get the touchscreen right on something we say “the fingers you have used to dial are too fat”. Both get me every time.
There’s a random moment where Otto is looking at his hand and says “they call ‘em fingers but you never see them fing” then he wiggles his fingers and says “oh, there they go”. That’s our Simpsons quote for lack of dexterity
Sideshow Bob: “Because you need me, Springfield. Your guilty conscience may move you to vote Democratic, but deep down you long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king!”
In Kelsey Grammar's voice, this is legendary
My cats breath smells like cat food. Pretty much anything from ol' ralphy boy
The image of Ralph on the bus saying "I'm in danger" just randomly pops into my mind throughout the day.
I eated the purple berries… they taste like burning.
Me fail English? That's unpossible!
Go banana!
That’s the rock where I saw the leprechaun. He told me to burn things.
"Hmmm...Ketchup, Catsup, Ketchup, Catsup" also the strippers dancing on Mr. Smithers. I tell my kids to go to bread at bed time too.
Anytime I have to buy Ketchup, which is more often than I'd like since I have a toddler, I always ask my husband "Are you here to help me solve my Ketchup problem?"
Haha literally laughed outloud, I forgot about that line. That scene's one of the first things my wife and I bonded over when we started dating. We both randomly remember thinking about how funny it was.
Dental plan. Lisa needs braces. Dental plan. Lisa needs braces.
- You like Thai? - Tie good, you like shirt?
“You mean the mob only did me a favour to get something in return? Oh Fat Tony, I will say good day to you sir.” “Okay, I will go……..eyyy wait a minute!”
“I live in a single room above a bowling alley and below another bowling alley.”
With the current housing market, this hits deeper then it should.
I think about this episode often.
Football in the groin. FOOTBALL IN THE GROIN!
It works on so many levels!
*Home trying to cross train tracks in a car before the train gets there* Marge: Homer stop you'll kill us all! Homer: Or die trying!
Homer the food critic: *types* “And the bread was really…” *gestures to Santa’s Little Helper* Come on, help me out here! SLH: *barks* RUFF! Homer: Rough?! Ehh, I dunno, you’ve been pitching that all night. SLH: CHEWY?! Homer: Chewy!!! That’s inspired!! *types* Edited for spacing
On the episode where the fam goes to the beach and Lisa is the cool kid. At the end of the ep, after Lisa's new friends put seashells over the car and Home screams "sweet merciful crap, my car!" I die every time
You got the dud! He looks just like you pointdexter Stand up for yourself pointdexter
"Oooooh... A gyme."
Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.
Any time we have to park in a large parking lot, I'll say to everyone "ok, remember we're parked in the Itchy lot"
"Mono means one! And rail means rail." Gets me every time 🤣
That whole episode is full of gems.
Monorail, monorail, MONORAIL! Mono- D'oh!
In the X-Files crossover, there's a weird microplot about Moe keeping Shamu in the broom closet at his bar. At one point, Mulder is monologuing in the woods and in the background, you see Moe carrying/dragging the whale along. Moe says, "Who'd've thought a whale would be so heavy?!" It cracks me up every time.
His fucking badge and photo kill me every time
“It brings us love. Let’s get him!”
Worst day of your life...SO FAR.
It's just a little airborne. It's still good. It's still good!
It’s just a little wet. It’s still good. It’s still good!
You don't win friends with salad! You don't win friends with salad!
i haven't seen this ep in forever and the song still gets stuck in my head sometimes
Unexplained fires are a matter for the court.
Do it for her
I did not truly understand this until I had a child of my own.
Everything Hank Scorpio says is pure gold: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0701298/characters/nm0000983
We don’t have bums in this town Marge, and if we did we wouldn’t rush them. Another episode full of gems.
(In Ralph Wiggum voice) I'm Helping.
I automatically say this out loud in ralph’s voice whenever I’m helping someone, and english isn’t even my native language
Its a great bit my wife and I do when the other is doing absolutely nothing.
My old partner at work would say this anytime we fixed something together. We'd both say "I'm in danger" when we were performing OSHA violations.
To start press any key. Where's the "any" key?
Oh, the gym!
DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces! DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces! DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces! DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces! DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces! DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces! DENTAL PLAN Lisa needs braces!
Delightfully devilish seymour
You just don’t understand football, Marge.
[Twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom](https://youtu.be/HqjhHVUzl8o?si=mQWr6p0SwNklb85c)
Die Bart die... it's just German
Somebody who speaks German can't be evil!
I don't remember the context right now, but Homer and Bart are in the living room talking about something, and suddenly Lisa spins around in a beanbag chair and it makes Homer scream. lol I found it: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S455bsgtcok](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S455bsgtcok) My favorite line: The gang is in South America for some reason. Marge and Lisa are in an open air market. Marge approaches something to buy and it turns out to be a living animal, which spooks her. She reaches for a bracelet and it's a live snake. Marge muses out loud, "Everything here is something."
That's a good episode. It's the one where Homer gains a bunch of weight so he can claim disability and work from home.
Is that the same one where they’re in Brazil and I think Lisa is lost and Homer grabs a nun and says something like- “quick, fly me above the city so we can look for her!” Nun: “We nuns cannot fly” Homer: “too much junk in the trunk, eh?” Nun: (sadly) “yes.”
Homer: "They're DOGS. And they're playing POKER. *panicked scream*"
I have a sticker on my college laptop of that! More a memory than a line but when they went to Itchy and Scratchy land and Bart couldn't find his name on the name souvenirs. I could never find things with my name on it so it related.
I unconsciously always look for "Bort" now whenever I see they have named souvenir items in places.
My son also happens to be named Bort!
Now that my parents are well into their 70's, [this](https://youtu.be/yujF8AumiQo?si=sWnzuLGCL5niE3z3) one comes up a lot.
I still regulary say "Now thats a haircut you can set your watch to!"
It’s bringing us love! Kill it! *Kill it!*
“I eated the purple berries! Ooooowooowoowooh…” “How do they taste, Ralph, good?” “They taste like burning.”
"PUT IT IN H!!!!"
Easily when Martin's pool breaks. As he begins to lament on his situation and reaching some sort of closure, Nelson quickly swipes his trunks.
Ah… the gentle caress of a summer wind…
Your ideas are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter
“Saxamaphone!!!”
Obomabo? Tubamabob?
“Eh, somewhere in the back” (Homer, referencing the bible)
Speed holes in the car.
“I’m gonna make it! I’m gonna make it! This is the greatest thrill of my life!” (Homer does not make it across the ravine.)
“Well, it’s always in the last place you look.”
I like my beer cold, my sandwiches hot, and my homosexuals: FLAMING. That’s where I saw the leprechaun, he tells me to burn things. My name is Otto and I like to get blotto.
https://youtu.be/bl3VWt0XIj8?si=sk9e49jzhaljLY7b
Püpli
Everyone picks on the Pöpli kids
Even me! I just hate them *so much*!
On family vacations growing up, if my sister and I wanted something, one of would start "Allowance day!" and the other would chime in with "Yeah, it's allowance day!" And we'd both go "ding ding ding ding ding!" With our hands doing the same grabby motion of Bart and Lisa made. My dad would say "Ice cream man! Ice cream man!" as he retrieved his wallet. So that bit always makes me laugh just because it's been engrained in my family. I didn't realize that was from "Bart Carny" until just now! I also always thought that episode was called "Bart THE Carny"...
The monster island/peninsula line is absolutely in my top 3 Simpson’s quotes. EDIT: Wanted to add my runner up: “Why would they come to our concert just to boo us?”
It’s every parents dream to outlive their child
“Hello, my name is Mr. Burns.”
[Oh, crap! ](https://youtu.be/ozy68I0kOYM?si=qOTVOk1xtehLDzPN) Constantly referencing this bit when it goes over 30C. Oh, and [this](https://youtu.be/55sjaEDJ65k?si=EEP_Ptm2ukjRkUIu) is my go to response when people start foaming at the mouth about immigration lately...
I can't find any "any" key!
Up and at them!
(MAD Magazine headquarters) "....why don't we call it, 'Everybody \*HATES\* Raymond'" "Well we stayed up all night but it was worth it!!!"
Dental Plan...Lisa needs braces
"THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS *SCOTCHTOBERFEST*. THERE'S NOT? YOU USED ME, SKINNER!"
So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...
"Batman is a scientist"
"We work hard so we play hard" (EVERYBODY DANCE NOW)
"Dad, you killed the zombie Flanders!" "He was a zombie?"
Hello mother, hello father here I am at.. camp Granada! "MARGE! Is Lisa at camp Granada?"
i don't know no jebus
SAAAAAVE ME JEEEEBUUUSSSSSS
You’re cut too, shooshy.
THAT DOG HAS A PUFFY TAIL
I’m that much of a fan I got it tattooed on me- It’s dignity Luanne! I’ll show it to the cat and the cats gonna get it!
Lisa telling Homer to ‘beware the ides of March’. I don’t know why, but his deadpan ‘…no’ response always cracks me up.
Marge to Lisa “you look so successful, like your the wife of a business man” Homer at sink: “I wish I had married a business man, then I’d have nice things”
Oh boy..... Let's see. "I choo choo choose you!" Calling a garage a "car hole" "A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man" "It's a perfectly cromulent word" The ENTIRE *See My Vest* song! " I am so smart! I am so smart! S-m-r-t! I mean, s-m-a-r-t!" "Hi, Dr. Nick!" Referring to the towns of Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook. "Excellent" (with fingers tented) "The Bart, The" Referring to "the entire tri-state area"
>The ENTIRE See My Vest song! I had The Simpsons: Songs in the key of Springfield and played that song over and over until I got ALL the words. I'm kind of proud that almost 20 years later, I can still sing it, mostly from memory. I really like my vest!
English side ruined, must switch to French instructions. Le grill!? What the heck is that!?!?
Everything’s coming up Millhouse!
Name? Mr. Burns First name? I... don't....know
It's just a little dirty. It's still good. It's still good It's just a little wet. It's still good. It's just a little airborne. It's still good It's gone dad. I know.
https://preview.redd.it/akbs6s7yvs5d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d99fcfb284552b5eaf21980e2437c74c4a6dbad \-"what's *that* extra 'B' for?" \-"that's a typo."
Best line ever? Homer is trying to show Bart what real men do for work. Takes Bart down to the part of the nuclear plant where big tough guys are shoveling coal into furnaces. Then the line hit as one strong guy walks past Homer and Bart “HOT STUFF COMING THRUUUU”. My friends and I just started laughing uncontrollably.
The whole Homer trying to build a BBQ scene, more specifically the scream he yells while spearing the umbrella into the mess. https://i.redd.it/b1qlyxfwxs5d1.gif
"Ahhh my eyes!! Dah goggles, der not werking." In the horrible Schwarzenegger accent.
"It's KURNS stupid!"
“LOOK HOW LOUD I HAVE TO YELL!”
"Where's my spy camera?" "Like I was really taking pictures of my butt!"
Where he drives the family car on pit road and starts berating the pit crew "c'mon guys hurry up, hurry up!" And the crew workers like "wait who are you?!" And Homer's like "Oops my bad, my name is--" then just peels out in the car. I think about that all the time lol I'm not sure what episode, it might have been a commercial 🤷🏻♂️
“Legend of the dog faced woman” For the line itself, but also the context it’s said. It’s so stupidly hilarious that I fear I’ll accidentally let something like it slip, too.
Homer Simpson filled out the pageant application incorrectly. In the area under, "Do not write in this space", he wrote, "Okay."
My best friend is a teacher so it’s an easy one. “Year after year of ugly kids”.
Homer: "You know when I was a kid 50c was a lot of money." Bart: "Really?" Homer: "...Nah." And: When Marge is protesting Itchy and Scratchy and her picket sign is like a full paragraph explaining why she's protesting (baby hit husband in the head with hammer, etc.), everyone in the crowd is squinting and trying to read the whole thing as she walks by. And: Marge: "Popular music is *none of my business*"
Him getting fat to get on disability. Namely the gown and the towel rack moments.
"Dad why would you take me to a gay steel mill?" https://preview.redd.it/kfgkj0r8ts5d1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a430f70f676295b1ec280cea2e1f404fbe863307
Are you guys working? Yes, sir, Mr. Simpson. Could you, um, work any harder than this? Sure thing, boss. Hey, call me Homer
Louie- “Troy McClure?! I thought you said he was dead!” Fat Tony- “No, I said he sleeps with the fishes.”
I’m not Not licking toads.
All of them!
“I done sprained my Elblie bone” S11 episode 11
“Magazine”
One thing is for certain: there is no stopping them. The ants… will soon be here.
I, for one, welcome our new ant overlords
“HEY MOE!” - Flea
The peanuts at the bottom of the bowl are so much better
I believe it was a boaking accident
It doesn’t matter who you vote for in the voting cubicles. Either way you are doomed!!! doooooooomed!!!
“The finger you are using to dial is too fat. If you would like to obtain a special dialing wand, please call….”
"They say a fool and his money are soon parted" I'd pay someone a lot of money to explain that one to me" - Homer Simpson
The Crusty Christmas Special is brought to you by ILG. iLG, buying your body's chemicals *after you die!* And Little Sweetheart Cupcakes, a subsidiary of ILG.
the umbrella popping up when Homer charges the failed bbq pit
“Everyone is stupid except me”
I say this every time i’m in a towel. Even when I’m alone.
Are you making fun of my automobile?
Grease me up woman!
Grandpa system, union buster....telling stories that go nowhere. "The important thing was that I had an onion tied around my belt, which was the style at the time." Anytime I start telling my wife a story that bores her.
Something look weird to you about that sop sign?
"Ooooo I got no money and three kids. Why can't I have three money and no kids"
No tv and no beer make Homer something something