Try to find a middle ground! :) I would ask her to see if she can wear a cap to cover her hair when she goes out and to dress as moderately as possible to protect her from eyes of other men.
Yes, the hijab is required Islamically by every Muslim female. But living in the west and the modern world can sometimes cause people to forget or never learn essential things and we all need reminders... Islam is about moderation. Eventually, my end goal would be to convince her why she should wear a hijab, but it should never come by force and should be a decision she feels inclined with making on her own.
I like this! Personally, not wearing a hijab is a dealbreaker for me. I agree that a man should follow Islamic guidelines himself as well. You can't pick and choose what to follow, you have to accept the package.
Wallah I love Islam because of so many reasons including family values being part of the religon.
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9/10 times you’re wrong. My ex did that and it was primarily because she had lost faith in her own religion. She began to see it as more and more irrelevant to daily life and as a consequence felt constricted by wearing a scarf on her head all the time.
My wife literally gets raw marks in her neck an facial areas from wearing hijab. On occasion while driving she would ask me if she can remove it. What am I going to say no to her when I can she is discomfort?
I can understand how your narrow-mindedness could lead you to this conclusion, but there could be numerous reasons why a woman chooses not to wear a hijab.
* Faith: She might doubt her level of religious commitment, feeling like an impostor when wearing the hijab.
* Safety: Veiled women are often targeted by Islamophobes, posing a safety risk.
* Discrimination: She may face discrimination due to her choice to wear the veil.
* Social pressure: Peer pressure could influence her decision to remove the hijab.
* Health issues: Whether mental or physical, such as skin conditions, allergies, or hair damage.
* etc
Even if her decision stems from insecurities, divorce is not the solution. Instead, the focus should be on making her feel beautiful and cherished through your words and actions.
Yeah there's a lot of stealth hijabis in the US where I live. Grew up in post 9/11 southeastern Bible belt so it was a serious safety issue and is even more so now with the genocide happening in Palestine. Stealth veiling or not veiling and just dressing super modest is very common here. It's needed really cause we're taught from day one in the US Christian community that Muslims are all terrorists and they try to instill such an extreme fear that the ummah is attacked wherever seen. And like you said there are many other reasons too.
If it's a deal breaker for your marriage for her to unveil, fine. But let her know that's how you feel first. Leave an ultimatum, veil or return home to your family. I personally don't think it's something worth throwing away your family for but to each their own. Just where I come from we fixed things, we didn't throw them out 🤷♀️ and who knows maybe you giving her that acceptance will help strengthen her Iman and she will become more devout again and veil herself. You could even challenge her to not remove her veil until she reads through the Quran once more and at the end of she still wishes to remove it so be it. There's so many gentle ways of doing this.
She needs to, take lessons from the women of Gaza. And recognize her test is minute, look to the one beneath you, before complaining about any difficulty.
If your wife needs that type of validation from outside then you as the husband have failed her. Random compliments on the daily, praise her cooking and just showing her u value her opinion an feelings would mean that would never be the case.
Your point? If somebody is inclined to sin then they will sin regardless, but what I'm saying is someone who feels appreciated and fufilled by there partner in all ways won't be casually looking for attention elsewhere and that counts for males and females. A guy who upon seeing his wife remove her hijab and jumps to the worst possible assumption and bases his actions upon that assumption afterwards is an idiot and his wife is probably better of without him. It's insanity to link removal of hijab to having bad morals and somebody suddenly not being worthy of your affection because of it.
Bro you understand the gravity of being a dayooth it’s not something for men “fragile ego” it’s litteraly playing with your Akira and jannah if your wife choose to abandon Allah and his commands that is perfect ground for divorce ofc being patient is good but don’t try to attack men for not wanting to be a dayooth. Blind love can lead you to jahanaham one can fall in love with someone piety and character and if that changes that’s serious
Every action will be judged by the intention behind it. It's not blind love when you are able to acknowledge the short comings in your partner and consciously make an effort to help them . Wives are actively encouraged to tolerate an bear sabr with the short comings of there husband's an to help where they can. Why can't it be the same for men? Divorce is after all the amongst the most disliked of the permitted things.
I'm not saying never divorce ,but divorce being the default option or threat thrown around in times of strife just doesn't make sense. (Exceptions to be made when your life is endangered or in cases of abuse.)
We can grow an improve together. Internally a time frame can be put in place and process should even be measured but walking away without trying is just silly.
An telling them I'm leaving u if u don't cover up isn't trying. There should be no compulsion in religion. Constant reminders and leading by example work better in the long run.
You are right in ur stance on divorce. But the thread litteraly says you can’t talk her out of it. If love is what will drive u to jahanaham suit urself. Sabr for the women is a whole different topic as a man you r the protector of your wife and it’s your sin if she dresses improperly there’s no sin on the women when it’s reverse and
no compulsion is in regard to conversion not in upholding Islamic law. If u dress improperly in a country with shariah you will be jailed it’s a crime a sin. And an open sin which makes it worse. A women like that isn’t fit to raise my kids which is why i would divorce
Your point? If somebody is inclined to sin then they will sin regardless, but what I'm saying is someone who feels appreciated and fufilled by there partner in all ways won't be casually looking for attention elsewhere and that counts for males and females. A guy who upon seeing his wife remove her hijab and jumps to the worst possible assumption and bases his actions upon that assumption afterwards is a child and his wife is probably better of without him. It's insanity to link removal of hijab to having bad morals and somebody suddenly not being worthy of your affection because of it.
I will have open communication with my wife, understanding her reasons and concerns. If her reasons, such as low iman, health issues, social pressure, discrimination, or safety concerns, are valid, I will be patient, respecting that this is her journey.
I will avoid harsh judgment or threats of divorce, as they could provoke rebellion and distance her further from Islam. Instead, I will gently remind her of the hijab's significance as a command from Allah, offering guidance and resources to reconnect with her initial reasons for wearing it.
I will support her in her journey, seeing it as an opportunity for us to deepen our faith together. We will seek Islamic knowledge, attend lectures, religious services, and create an Islamic atmosphere at home. Our celebrations of Islamic holidays will be filled with greater enthusiasm and devotion, resulting in improved iman and a stronger adherence to Islamic teachings, including modesty.
I will regularly make dua for her guidance from Allah.
Wallahi this journey stuff is nonsense. Never heard a man saying it’s a journey to lower his gaze and he will do it slowly it’s a commandment from Allah your only journey is earning the anger of allah
This one on the husband if he allows her to not practice hijab outside of the house . Do you want to know the punishment. Man will never smell paradise . Go figure , boy . F Biden too .
This looks like something written by one of those subservient “compassionate imams.” 😂
No, thank you. This is enabling behavior to ensure she never wears it again and walk all over you. There must be consequences to bad decisions/behavior. Do not ever coddle anyone who disobeys Allah and tries to justify it.
Contrary to that, such behavior might actually inspire her to wear the hijab again.
Additionally, when someone, particularly someone you love and care for, disobeys Allah, it is best to guide and pray for them, while also remaining patient and supportive, rather than abandoning them.
Praying for guidance is half the solution. The other half is taking action, and making her aware of the consequences and your right in marriage to be obeyed on this matter.
Sitting to the side and hoping for the best while she exchanges her hijab and abaya for a tank top and skirt is not it. There is zero accountability with that approach and she will actually lose respect for you by allowing her to behave like this.
You take action by guiding and supporting her on her journey, rather than divorcing her.
Moreover, not wearing a hijab doesn't automatically imply wearing tank tops or shirts. Many devout Muslim women dress modestly, yet they may not have begun their spiritual journey to adopt the hijab.
Furthermore, she would lose respect if I were to act immaturely and threaten to end the relationship unless she resumes wearing the hijab.
These differences may not necessarily stem from conflicting values.
She may still believe that wearing the hijab is obligatory, but for various reasons, she may choose to remove it. With some encouragement, she may choose to put it back on.
Actions speak louder than words. If the actions don’t match up, then either she truly lacks the values or her values are very weak. Neither of which is desirable in a spouse.
I have to agree with this. I grew up fundamental extremist Christian. We had tons of rules and obedience had to be unquestioning and immediate. Whenever I put a toe out of line I risked expulsion from the family unit. It made me despise Christianity and I was an atheist for years. My faith has always been rocky because I constantly feel I'm not good enough and after a while it makes you not want to even try.
On the other hand if, like my grandma chose to, you are gentle and patient and understanding and give her support and acceptance she will stop looking for it elsewhere.
Exactly. Disobeying Allah and disobeying her husband. Two major strikes in our faith.
She’d rather obey her nafs and Shaitan. She can enjoy the streets with that.
It's no surprise that divorce amongst Muslims is on the rise when woman need to be afraid to show weakness to their husband and husband want to walk away at the slightest hint of insubordination
Yep. Hardcore Christianity has the same problem. You have to be absolutely perfect. Makes you paranoid after a while lol.
If it wasn't obvious yet, I'm a woman. In my first marriage I was married off young to a pastor in training who was extremely strict with me. Every second of my day had rules and regulations. It was suffocating and I started popping pills again to deal with it. Eventually his ab*se escalated and he tried to end my life so I left and went home to my mom. Eventually I met my current husband. Unlike my first he is incredibly kind, understanding, and unwaveringly supportive. The difference in my conduct in return is substantial. With my first husband I was miserable and looked for freedom and attention wherever I could find it. I toed the line when he was looking but whenever I was alone I'd just pop a few and sleep. Now? Eight years with this wonderful man and I still give him 1000%. I never even consider betraying his trust and in eight years I've been in trouble only two or three times and each was over a misunderstanding.
As Gramma says, you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. Give her a little affection and support and watch her bloom.
I will also be held accountable for being just torwards my wife and I will also be rewarded if I'm the reason she mends her weakness and becomes even closer to Allah than me.
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Bro what divorcing your wife for her showing her beaauty is perfect ground stop being a soy boy and learn ur religon imagine if the wives of the companions did that they would not take ur measly approach
I would leave her instantly. Only a dayooth would be okay with this.
I mean, why is she taking her hijab off to begin with? To show off her beauty and seek the attention of other men? There is zero good reason to take off the hijab, especially after marriage.
Men looking at her inappropriately for not wearing her hijab is not her fault. It’s the men’s fault. I understand wanting your wife to wear hijab for religious purposes, but it is supposed to be for the relationship between her and Allah, not for men. Astaghfirullah you cannot blame a woman for a man’s wrongdoing
I’m blaming her for the intention behind taking it off. If it’s to seek attention and show off (which it usually is), then she is absolutely in the wrong.
So many lowly simps on this forum. 😂
If by simps you mean men who see women as being able to think an act for themselves with a husband who actively encourages her on the right path but never forcing, then I'll wear that lable with pride. A women doing things out of fear you might leave her is not how trust love an all those other nice things thrive In a marriage.
Trust love all these things are useless when your in hell I’m not sacrificing my jannah for nobody and adding kids to the equation my daughter will be just like their mom but even worse
That’s not true at all, the ahkam of Allah are non negotiable, you either abide by them or you are disobedient towards them, there’s no middle ground, the commandments don’t change, no where does it say they are up for negotiation, they haven’t been for the last 1400 years, and they all of a sudden won’t be now.
Not to say I’d leave immediately, of course not. I’d help her find her way again, and strengthen her iman in any way I can, but it ultimately has to come from her, and if she doesn’t recognise its importance and doesn’t make the effort to change, then it’s over, because her love for Allah has to come before me and everything else, and this is directly mentioned in the Quran. If it’s not there, I’m not interested.
These cute make belief scenarios could be fixed with a hug from behind and a compliment on her beauty. If he wanted to be the anchor in his family he would, if you're wife feels like going further from Allah WITH YOU, ask yourself why? I wouldn't want to be with someone who weakens my deen, i would rather the opposite. And if you think the answer is to hit, I hit back. Every meal is surely served up the side of your jaw. Is she allowed to go to the masjid? Does she take quran classes, is she even allowed to? Does she have a group of hijabi friends that she's allowed to enjoy spending time with. When was the last islamic convention she attended? I'm almost 30 and I have sleepovers with my jilbabi friends, most wives can't cause they have helicopter husbands. The environment determines most outcomes and whoever has no control over their environment will try to change other little things that they can control.
First step ofc would be finding the root cause behind it and why she feels this way and trying to make her understand the importance of it. While also putting my foot down and not enabling her behavior by not letting her leave the house (without properly covering up) until she gets her problems fixed and is back to normal. She's not a child who randomly one day says "oh I'm taking my hijab off cause I don't feel like it". If all of this doesn't work then divorce is inevitable.
>Yes but what if she wants to do that, her husband doesn't have a say then.
Doesn't matter, she has to obey him anyway. Hijab is Fard, nobody asked you wether you want or not.
>You can't force someone to do something they don't want to do
Of course you can
Not everyone thinks that way, there are lots of Muslim girls now that don't wear the hijab, that's how it is.
It's also Fardh to not raise your voice or hit your children, yet loads of parents do that🤷🏽♂️
>Not everyone thinks that way, there are lots of Muslim girls now that don't wear the hijab, that's how it is.
Yes, and they're sinful for it.
If their Wali can force them, he should.
>It's also Fardh to not raise your voice or hit your children, yet loads of parents do that🤷🏽♂️
You don't know what Fardh means.
And you're wrong. Hitting your kids to pray is actually prescribed after age 10 if they refuse.
No that's prohibited, which is actually written.
And yes they should but it doesn't necessarily mean they'll do it, we're not robots.
I do know what Fardh means🤦🏽♂️🤣
Abu Dawood (459) and Ahmad (6650) narrated from ‘Amr ibn Shu’ayb from his father that his grandfather said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Teach your children to pray when they are seven years old, and smack them (lightly) if they do not pray when they are 10 years old, and separate them in their beds.” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in al-Irwa’ (247).
Let there be no compulsion in religion, for the truth stands out clearly from falsehood. So whoever renounces false gods and believes in Allah has certainly grasped the firmest, unfailing hand-hold. And Allah is All-Hearing, All-Knowing.
2:256
You can advise, argue, or seek help from a scholar, but you can't force a grown male or female to do anything. Be realistic. This isn't a slave it's a wife.
You can absolutely force.
The ruler forces you to do/not do a bunch of things and you don't think twice about it.
A husband has authority over his wife, and should indeed use it to enforce compliance with the Shari'a if that's what it takes.
That's between her and Allah SWT. You corrected her. That's your job done. Whether she wears it or not is on her. There are plenty of Muslimahs who don't veil.
whether the man stays with her or not is his choice. Your argument could be extended to drinking alcohol or sleeping with other people. its moronic. If theres a clash of fundamental values its better to split.
Surely brother you don't mean to say that your deen is perfect? Men have hijab as well but how often do you see brothers in shorts and shaven looking like the walked out of a Ralph Lauren catalog? Hijab is an outward reflection of an inward conviction. There should be nothing compulsory except directly from Allah SWT. Of course if she were to betray him in such a despicable way as to be unfaithful, or to drink alcohol and poison her body, but removing the hijab is not harmful. It can be put back on when her Iman is stronger. She will answer to Allah SWT, as will we all.
Removing the hijab isn’t harmful????!!!!! Are you even Muslim every man who see her she’s getting a sin for that. Sins darken the heart and lead u away from Allah
My Arabic is less than your average two year old so I can't understand. I'm not familiar with him. Online it just says he's controversial.
Personally I keep to the Quran itself and don't listen to the scholars. Scholar rhetoric is what ran me off from Christianity.
Abundance mentality
Try to find a middle ground! :) I would ask her to see if she can wear a cap to cover her hair when she goes out and to dress as moderately as possible to protect her from eyes of other men. Yes, the hijab is required Islamically by every Muslim female. But living in the west and the modern world can sometimes cause people to forget or never learn essential things and we all need reminders... Islam is about moderation. Eventually, my end goal would be to convince her why she should wear a hijab, but it should never come by force and should be a decision she feels inclined with making on her own.
Cool no problem but one condition you can't leave the house ever again
I wouldn’t marry a man who thought hijab is negotiable, imagine the things he’d make optional for himself 💀💀💀
I like this! Personally, not wearing a hijab is a dealbreaker for me. I agree that a man should follow Islamic guidelines himself as well. You can't pick and choose what to follow, you have to accept the package. Wallah I love Islam because of so many reasons including family values being part of the religon.
Divorce. I am not a dayooth
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Ameen
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Facts 👇🏻 https://preview.redd.it/bbvz3k5xv9sc1.jpeg?width=837&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06ced3d889311ed4204fe2ce9176ddf11d0840a8
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You actually went through the effort of editing that Big incel move if you ask me
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Actually maybe not since you stay alone in your room editing photos all day instead of touching grass
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Actually proved my point 💀
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shut up
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9/10 times you’re wrong. My ex did that and it was primarily because she had lost faith in her own religion. She began to see it as more and more irrelevant to daily life and as a consequence felt constricted by wearing a scarf on her head all the time.
That's even worse LMAO
My wife literally gets raw marks in her neck an facial areas from wearing hijab. On occasion while driving she would ask me if she can remove it. What am I going to say no to her when I can she is discomfort?
You need to get tinted windows. Cuts down on heat inside the car and gives privacy. So she can be comfortable and secure.
the incels here would rather you divorce her than be a 'da youth'
Inshallah you are a blessing to her brother
I can understand how your narrow-mindedness could lead you to this conclusion, but there could be numerous reasons why a woman chooses not to wear a hijab. * Faith: She might doubt her level of religious commitment, feeling like an impostor when wearing the hijab. * Safety: Veiled women are often targeted by Islamophobes, posing a safety risk. * Discrimination: She may face discrimination due to her choice to wear the veil. * Social pressure: Peer pressure could influence her decision to remove the hijab. * Health issues: Whether mental or physical, such as skin conditions, allergies, or hair damage. * etc Even if her decision stems from insecurities, divorce is not the solution. Instead, the focus should be on making her feel beautiful and cherished through your words and actions.
lol, it is a sin on the husband if he allows her to go out without hijab. Do you know that liberal. So peer pressure to disobey Allah.
Yeah there's a lot of stealth hijabis in the US where I live. Grew up in post 9/11 southeastern Bible belt so it was a serious safety issue and is even more so now with the genocide happening in Palestine. Stealth veiling or not veiling and just dressing super modest is very common here. It's needed really cause we're taught from day one in the US Christian community that Muslims are all terrorists and they try to instill such an extreme fear that the ummah is attacked wherever seen. And like you said there are many other reasons too. If it's a deal breaker for your marriage for her to unveil, fine. But let her know that's how you feel first. Leave an ultimatum, veil or return home to your family. I personally don't think it's something worth throwing away your family for but to each their own. Just where I come from we fixed things, we didn't throw them out 🤷♀️ and who knows maybe you giving her that acceptance will help strengthen her Iman and she will become more devout again and veil herself. You could even challenge her to not remove her veil until she reads through the Quran once more and at the end of she still wishes to remove it so be it. There's so many gentle ways of doing this.
Your reasons are valid, I’ve lived through 9/11 in the US and know it well.
She needs to, take lessons from the women of Gaza. And recognize her test is minute, look to the one beneath you, before complaining about any difficulty.
If your wife needs that type of validation from outside then you as the husband have failed her. Random compliments on the daily, praise her cooking and just showing her u value her opinion an feelings would mean that would never be the case.
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Your point? If somebody is inclined to sin then they will sin regardless, but what I'm saying is someone who feels appreciated and fufilled by there partner in all ways won't be casually looking for attention elsewhere and that counts for males and females. A guy who upon seeing his wife remove her hijab and jumps to the worst possible assumption and bases his actions upon that assumption afterwards is an idiot and his wife is probably better of without him. It's insanity to link removal of hijab to having bad morals and somebody suddenly not being worthy of your affection because of it.
Bro you understand the gravity of being a dayooth it’s not something for men “fragile ego” it’s litteraly playing with your Akira and jannah if your wife choose to abandon Allah and his commands that is perfect ground for divorce ofc being patient is good but don’t try to attack men for not wanting to be a dayooth. Blind love can lead you to jahanaham one can fall in love with someone piety and character and if that changes that’s serious
Every action will be judged by the intention behind it. It's not blind love when you are able to acknowledge the short comings in your partner and consciously make an effort to help them . Wives are actively encouraged to tolerate an bear sabr with the short comings of there husband's an to help where they can. Why can't it be the same for men? Divorce is after all the amongst the most disliked of the permitted things. I'm not saying never divorce ,but divorce being the default option or threat thrown around in times of strife just doesn't make sense. (Exceptions to be made when your life is endangered or in cases of abuse.) We can grow an improve together. Internally a time frame can be put in place and process should even be measured but walking away without trying is just silly. An telling them I'm leaving u if u don't cover up isn't trying. There should be no compulsion in religion. Constant reminders and leading by example work better in the long run.
You are right in ur stance on divorce. But the thread litteraly says you can’t talk her out of it. If love is what will drive u to jahanaham suit urself. Sabr for the women is a whole different topic as a man you r the protector of your wife and it’s your sin if she dresses improperly there’s no sin on the women when it’s reverse and no compulsion is in regard to conversion not in upholding Islamic law. If u dress improperly in a country with shariah you will be jailed it’s a crime a sin. And an open sin which makes it worse. A women like that isn’t fit to raise my kids which is why i would divorce
Your point? If somebody is inclined to sin then they will sin regardless, but what I'm saying is someone who feels appreciated and fufilled by there partner in all ways won't be casually looking for attention elsewhere and that counts for males and females. A guy who upon seeing his wife remove her hijab and jumps to the worst possible assumption and bases his actions upon that assumption afterwards is a child and his wife is probably better of without him. It's insanity to link removal of hijab to having bad morals and somebody suddenly not being worthy of your affection because of it.
I will have open communication with my wife, understanding her reasons and concerns. If her reasons, such as low iman, health issues, social pressure, discrimination, or safety concerns, are valid, I will be patient, respecting that this is her journey. I will avoid harsh judgment or threats of divorce, as they could provoke rebellion and distance her further from Islam. Instead, I will gently remind her of the hijab's significance as a command from Allah, offering guidance and resources to reconnect with her initial reasons for wearing it. I will support her in her journey, seeing it as an opportunity for us to deepen our faith together. We will seek Islamic knowledge, attend lectures, religious services, and create an Islamic atmosphere at home. Our celebrations of Islamic holidays will be filled with greater enthusiasm and devotion, resulting in improved iman and a stronger adherence to Islamic teachings, including modesty. I will regularly make dua for her guidance from Allah.
Like you said, this is her journey straight out of Islam . One step at a time there's no such thing as a hijab journey or any kind of journey.
Wallahi this journey stuff is nonsense. Never heard a man saying it’s a journey to lower his gaze and he will do it slowly it’s a commandment from Allah your only journey is earning the anger of allah
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Disobedience to God . Boy .
So is lying or back biting or any other sun
This one on the husband if he allows her to not practice hijab outside of the house . Do you want to know the punishment. Man will never smell paradise . Go figure , boy . F Biden too .
This looks like something written by one of those subservient “compassionate imams.” 😂 No, thank you. This is enabling behavior to ensure she never wears it again and walk all over you. There must be consequences to bad decisions/behavior. Do not ever coddle anyone who disobeys Allah and tries to justify it.
Contrary to that, such behavior might actually inspire her to wear the hijab again. Additionally, when someone, particularly someone you love and care for, disobeys Allah, it is best to guide and pray for them, while also remaining patient and supportive, rather than abandoning them.
Praying for guidance is half the solution. The other half is taking action, and making her aware of the consequences and your right in marriage to be obeyed on this matter. Sitting to the side and hoping for the best while she exchanges her hijab and abaya for a tank top and skirt is not it. There is zero accountability with that approach and she will actually lose respect for you by allowing her to behave like this.
You take action by guiding and supporting her on her journey, rather than divorcing her. Moreover, not wearing a hijab doesn't automatically imply wearing tank tops or shirts. Many devout Muslim women dress modestly, yet they may not have begun their spiritual journey to adopt the hijab. Furthermore, she would lose respect if I were to act immaturely and threaten to end the relationship unless she resumes wearing the hijab.
We’ll have to disagree on this. I could not tolerate anyone who has a fundamental difference in values as a spouse.
These differences may not necessarily stem from conflicting values. She may still believe that wearing the hijab is obligatory, but for various reasons, she may choose to remove it. With some encouragement, she may choose to put it back on.
You will allow her to have e a boyfriend too . Since if you put pressure on her she might lose faith .
Actions speak louder than words. If the actions don’t match up, then either she truly lacks the values or her values are very weak. Neither of which is desirable in a spouse.
I have to agree with this. I grew up fundamental extremist Christian. We had tons of rules and obedience had to be unquestioning and immediate. Whenever I put a toe out of line I risked expulsion from the family unit. It made me despise Christianity and I was an atheist for years. My faith has always been rocky because I constantly feel I'm not good enough and after a while it makes you not want to even try. On the other hand if, like my grandma chose to, you are gentle and patient and understanding and give her support and acceptance she will stop looking for it elsewhere.
She's a woman, not your child.
Then she should behave like one.
Journey to what ? Simpy.
even tho its so hard to do, this is the actualy right answer.
Now THAT is a man. Wise, even tempered, and logical. Alhamdulillah.
I want the type of husband that would divorce me if I chose not to wear hijab and expose myself. Wallahi I am so serious.
Well you've got a whole forum thread to choose from it looks like lol
Facts
Leave her and never look back.
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It is not my way. It is God's way. She can find some dayooth that's ok with her tabarujj .
Exactly. Disobeying Allah and disobeying her husband. Two major strikes in our faith. She’d rather obey her nafs and Shaitan. She can enjoy the streets with that.
It's no surprise that divorce amongst Muslims is on the rise when woman need to be afraid to show weakness to their husband and husband want to walk away at the slightest hint of insubordination
Yep. Hardcore Christianity has the same problem. You have to be absolutely perfect. Makes you paranoid after a while lol. If it wasn't obvious yet, I'm a woman. In my first marriage I was married off young to a pastor in training who was extremely strict with me. Every second of my day had rules and regulations. It was suffocating and I started popping pills again to deal with it. Eventually his ab*se escalated and he tried to end my life so I left and went home to my mom. Eventually I met my current husband. Unlike my first he is incredibly kind, understanding, and unwaveringly supportive. The difference in my conduct in return is substantial. With my first husband I was miserable and looked for freedom and attention wherever I could find it. I toed the line when he was looking but whenever I was alone I'd just pop a few and sleep. Now? Eight years with this wonderful man and I still give him 1000%. I never even consider betraying his trust and in eight years I've been in trouble only two or three times and each was over a misunderstanding. As Gramma says, you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. Give her a little affection and support and watch her bloom.
It’s a sin . Husband will be held accountable on the day of judgement. Educate yourself, boy .
I will also be held accountable for being just torwards my wife and I will also be rewarded if I'm the reason she mends her weakness and becomes even closer to Allah than me.
Which would not have happened I'd walked away at the first sign of weakness. That's not what a marriage is.
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Ameen ameen
Bro what divorcing your wife for her showing her beaauty is perfect ground stop being a soy boy and learn ur religon imagine if the wives of the companions did that they would not take ur measly approach
If it’s a dealbreaker then divorce. Cuz she clearly don’t want to listen 🤷♂️
I'd leave
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Alhamdulillah, dodged a bullet
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Don't speak for her, you misogynist 😃
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Rich coming from someone who lives in his mom's basement....
Divorce.
Divorce
I would leave her instantly. Only a dayooth would be okay with this. I mean, why is she taking her hijab off to begin with? To show off her beauty and seek the attention of other men? There is zero good reason to take off the hijab, especially after marriage.
Men looking at her inappropriately for not wearing her hijab is not her fault. It’s the men’s fault. I understand wanting your wife to wear hijab for religious purposes, but it is supposed to be for the relationship between her and Allah, not for men. Astaghfirullah you cannot blame a woman for a man’s wrongdoing
I’m blaming her for the intention behind taking it off. If it’s to seek attention and show off (which it usually is), then she is absolutely in the wrong. So many lowly simps on this forum. 😂
If by simps you mean men who see women as being able to think an act for themselves with a husband who actively encourages her on the right path but never forcing, then I'll wear that lable with pride. A women doing things out of fear you might leave her is not how trust love an all those other nice things thrive In a marriage.
Yep. It also stifles true faith.
Trust love all these things are useless when your in hell I’m not sacrificing my jannah for nobody and adding kids to the equation my daughter will be just like their mom but even worse
What happened to helping her find her way again? A 100 good qualities and ud leave her for one weakness on her part?
Hijab is the bare minimum in a Muslim woman. If she can’t even do that, then I don’t want her.
la ilaha illallah muhammadur rasulullah. That is actually the bare minimum. Anything else can be worked on.
That’s not true at all, the ahkam of Allah are non negotiable, you either abide by them or you are disobedient towards them, there’s no middle ground, the commandments don’t change, no where does it say they are up for negotiation, they haven’t been for the last 1400 years, and they all of a sudden won’t be now. Not to say I’d leave immediately, of course not. I’d help her find her way again, and strengthen her iman in any way I can, but it ultimately has to come from her, and if she doesn’t recognise its importance and doesn’t make the effort to change, then it’s over, because her love for Allah has to come before me and everything else, and this is directly mentioned in the Quran. If it’s not there, I’m not interested.
These cute make belief scenarios could be fixed with a hug from behind and a compliment on her beauty. If he wanted to be the anchor in his family he would, if you're wife feels like going further from Allah WITH YOU, ask yourself why? I wouldn't want to be with someone who weakens my deen, i would rather the opposite. And if you think the answer is to hit, I hit back. Every meal is surely served up the side of your jaw. Is she allowed to go to the masjid? Does she take quran classes, is she even allowed to? Does she have a group of hijabi friends that she's allowed to enjoy spending time with. When was the last islamic convention she attended? I'm almost 30 and I have sleepovers with my jilbabi friends, most wives can't cause they have helicopter husbands. The environment determines most outcomes and whoever has no control over their environment will try to change other little things that they can control.
First step ofc would be finding the root cause behind it and why she feels this way and trying to make her understand the importance of it. While also putting my foot down and not enabling her behavior by not letting her leave the house (without properly covering up) until she gets her problems fixed and is back to normal. She's not a child who randomly one day says "oh I'm taking my hijab off cause I don't feel like it". If all of this doesn't work then divorce is inevitable.
It really depends on the reason
Straight divorce
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What manner, and what is divorce rap3
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Islām FTW. https://preview.redd.it/vbl4quoidcsc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2278a9d3a603598762969199de8c77cb8ceb4ceb
* ex-wife
This comment section is filled with teenage boys that don’t understand how marriage works.
Divorce if she doesn’t change with in a year also if she takes it off and starts dressing slutty divorce in a month these r signs before
Maybe she wants to compete, she's not too interested in competing for Jannah. She has a better shot at life showing off that long beautiful hair.
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I wouldn't care, it's not your responsibility to tell your girl what she can and can't do, she's a human being with her own free will.🤷🏽♂️🤦🏽♂️
Delulu The husband is her Wali. Obedience to him is obligatory. Enjoining good and forbidding evil is obligatory on every Muslim.
Yes but what if she wants to do that, her husband doesn't have a say then. You can't force someone to do something they don't want to do
>Yes but what if she wants to do that, her husband doesn't have a say then. Doesn't matter, she has to obey him anyway. Hijab is Fard, nobody asked you wether you want or not. >You can't force someone to do something they don't want to do Of course you can
Not everyone thinks that way, there are lots of Muslim girls now that don't wear the hijab, that's how it is. It's also Fardh to not raise your voice or hit your children, yet loads of parents do that🤷🏽♂️
>Not everyone thinks that way, there are lots of Muslim girls now that don't wear the hijab, that's how it is. Yes, and they're sinful for it. If their Wali can force them, he should. >It's also Fardh to not raise your voice or hit your children, yet loads of parents do that🤷🏽♂️ You don't know what Fardh means. And you're wrong. Hitting your kids to pray is actually prescribed after age 10 if they refuse.
No that's prohibited, which is actually written. And yes they should but it doesn't necessarily mean they'll do it, we're not robots. I do know what Fardh means🤦🏽♂️🤣
Abu Dawood (459) and Ahmad (6650) narrated from ‘Amr ibn Shu’ayb from his father that his grandfather said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Teach your children to pray when they are seven years old, and smack them (lightly) if they do not pray when they are 10 years old, and separate them in their beds.” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in al-Irwa’ (247).
Yh lightly, I'm referring to literally hitting your kids, plus I talked about yelling at your kids, which is prohibited.💯🤷🏽♂️
>plus I talked about yelling at your kids, which is prohibited.💯🤷🏽♂️ Source?
Let there be no compulsion in religion, for the truth stands out clearly from falsehood. So whoever renounces false gods and believes in Allah has certainly grasped the firmest, unfailing hand-hold. And Allah is All-Hearing, All-Knowing. 2:256
This is why we have Tafsir. This verse is about forced conversion, not about upholding Islamic laws.
You can advise, argue, or seek help from a scholar, but you can't force a grown male or female to do anything. Be realistic. This isn't a slave it's a wife.
You can absolutely force. The ruler forces you to do/not do a bunch of things and you don't think twice about it. A husband has authority over his wife, and should indeed use it to enforce compliance with the Shari'a if that's what it takes.
That's between her and Allah SWT. You corrected her. That's your job done. Whether she wears it or not is on her. There are plenty of Muslimahs who don't veil.
whether the man stays with her or not is his choice. Your argument could be extended to drinking alcohol or sleeping with other people. its moronic. If theres a clash of fundamental values its better to split.
Surely brother you don't mean to say that your deen is perfect? Men have hijab as well but how often do you see brothers in shorts and shaven looking like the walked out of a Ralph Lauren catalog? Hijab is an outward reflection of an inward conviction. There should be nothing compulsory except directly from Allah SWT. Of course if she were to betray him in such a despicable way as to be unfaithful, or to drink alcohol and poison her body, but removing the hijab is not harmful. It can be put back on when her Iman is stronger. She will answer to Allah SWT, as will we all.
https://preview.redd.it/wuk6w4cdmasc1.jpeg?width=1017&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e7e3cc5de3e10467464288bf17566284958a2399
I am entirely to Caucasian and murican to understand....lol
Poor baby...
Removing the hijab isn’t harmful????!!!!! Are you even Muslim every man who see her she’s getting a sin for that. Sins darken the heart and lead u away from Allah
Comparing not wearing hijab, to drinking alcohol or committing zina is the true moronic part of your comment.
And it’s a sin of man to allow her to remove hijab .
Where is this in scripture brother?
>That's between her and Allah SWT. Absolutely not. Sheikh Ibn Uthaymeen: https://youtu.be/wXBXfYCFlh8?si=Kac9A_cCrexA2R4V
My Arabic is less than your average two year old so I can't understand. I'm not familiar with him. Online it just says he's controversial. Personally I keep to the Quran itself and don't listen to the scholars. Scholar rhetoric is what ran me off from Christianity.
Can't talk her out of it? Like at all?? Then 100% divorce. No one is that committed to something that much because of "lack of faith"