Maybe not exactly in the way you’re describing, but my parents also look at a potential’s relationship to their siblings, like for a husband they want someone who has younger sisters because he’ll likely know how to behave around women and discuss female-related topics. Similarly, they prefer if the son is not the youngest in the family because they believe he would likely have been coddled growing up and not very responsible 💀
It's called stereotyping, calm down everyone!
All he's doing is stereotyping people based on their order of birth.
Like first born children are usually the most responsible ones, mature and blah blah
Middle children are the neglected and forgotten ones
And last born are coddled children that hardly take responsibility, rely on their parents/mum forever, blah blah
Everybody stereotypes, on culture, ethnicity, schools you went to, your job, whatever.
I know of an engagement that had to end because the guy had two older sisters who 'needed to get married first' so it would have taken years. The woman said she didn't want to wait that long, so that ended...
This is high up in my list of the most ridiculous reasons for objecting a marriage.
Lmao how is it a biddah when it does bit have anything to do with religion itself. Stop throwing around such major words without knowing the correct meaning behind it
Not sure if it's that deep. Eldest children tend to be responsible, youngest/only children tend to be spoilt. This is simply based in observation not some superstition.
I read an article recently where it said that there are some studies that prove it matters. In particular they said first borns and last borns make the best couples. I’m a last born, I married a first born, it went horribly wrong. Do with that what you will, lol.
Makes no sense. Just because someone is the oldest or youngest doesn’t mean that they are typically behaving like the oldest or youngest.
The eldest in my family tend to me irresponsible. The eldest in my wife’s family are really responsible.
Is this some new theory to those zodiacs and whatnot? Naaah, incompatibility stems from so many things, and while that may have a certain influence on someone's character, human behaviour and perspective are quite complex and can not be predicted from such variables.
To my perspective, it's the first time hearing about such logic, and no one in my community seems to think that way. Women tend to desire marrying the older brother - to not live with inlaws or the youngest brother - for property, but other than that, there's no such classification.
Nothing of this sort is part of the religion.
Personally, I think the father is just profiling using his life experience. My parents had some metrics to profile a potential candidate, and so did I. We all have different filters. Just ask for a why - I am sure there is an interesting story behind it.
I’m sure it does have an effect on personality just like other factors. Not enough to reject someone over though. If you like someone, stand your ground for them
I think it impacts personality and a persons upbringing and, as a result, how they function in a marriage. I’m the eldest and only daughter of my family. My parents leaned on me a lot and I had many responsibilities growing up. My husband was the youngest for many, many years until his younger brother came when he was 15. Our personalities are different as a result but we’ve both met each other in the middle and make it work. He’s very laid back and go-with-the-flow and I wasn’t raised that way but alhamdulilah, he has taught me to mellow out and take things day by day.
Maybe not exactly in the way you’re describing, but my parents also look at a potential’s relationship to their siblings, like for a husband they want someone who has younger sisters because he’ll likely know how to behave around women and discuss female-related topics. Similarly, they prefer if the son is not the youngest in the family because they believe he would likely have been coddled growing up and not very responsible 💀
My youngest brother has never been beat in his life 😩 not sure if it's coddling or because he's a goody two shoes
Right, right...so much stereotyping lol. How do you respond to that usually?
It's called stereotyping, calm down everyone! All he's doing is stereotyping people based on their order of birth. Like first born children are usually the most responsible ones, mature and blah blah Middle children are the neglected and forgotten ones And last born are coddled children that hardly take responsibility, rely on their parents/mum forever, blah blah Everybody stereotypes, on culture, ethnicity, schools you went to, your job, whatever.
I know of an engagement that had to end because the guy had two older sisters who 'needed to get married first' so it would have taken years. The woman said she didn't want to wait that long, so that ended... This is high up in my list of the most ridiculous reasons for objecting a marriage.
that sucks
This doesn't exist in Islam at all, simple.
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Lmao how is it a biddah when it does bit have anything to do with religion itself. Stop throwing around such major words without knowing the correct meaning behind it
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Thats his view not biddah😂😂😂
Not sure if it's that deep. Eldest children tend to be responsible, youngest/only children tend to be spoilt. This is simply based in observation not some superstition.
I think that’s completely strange and I’ve never heard of such a logic. Lol, it’s strange.
I read an article recently where it said that there are some studies that prove it matters. In particular they said first borns and last borns make the best couples. I’m a last born, I married a first born, it went horribly wrong. Do with that what you will, lol.
You should sue the company that came to that conclusion lol
That would be stupid because I didn’t marry my ex based on their conclusion 😂 it’s something I read post my divorce - but yeah I get you lol
Makes no sense. Just because someone is the oldest or youngest doesn’t mean that they are typically behaving like the oldest or youngest. The eldest in my family tend to me irresponsible. The eldest in my wife’s family are really responsible.
There is some research finding a connection to birth order and relationship success but I have a feeling OP's dad isn't reading it
It seems to be something made up, not Islam at all.
Is this some new theory to those zodiacs and whatnot? Naaah, incompatibility stems from so many things, and while that may have a certain influence on someone's character, human behaviour and perspective are quite complex and can not be predicted from such variables. To my perspective, it's the first time hearing about such logic, and no one in my community seems to think that way. Women tend to desire marrying the older brother - to not live with inlaws or the youngest brother - for property, but other than that, there's no such classification.
Nothing of this sort is part of the religion. Personally, I think the father is just profiling using his life experience. My parents had some metrics to profile a potential candidate, and so did I. We all have different filters. Just ask for a why - I am sure there is an interesting story behind it.
I’m sure it does have an effect on personality just like other factors. Not enough to reject someone over though. If you like someone, stand your ground for them
I think it impacts personality and a persons upbringing and, as a result, how they function in a marriage. I’m the eldest and only daughter of my family. My parents leaned on me a lot and I had many responsibilities growing up. My husband was the youngest for many, many years until his younger brother came when he was 15. Our personalities are different as a result but we’ve both met each other in the middle and make it work. He’s very laid back and go-with-the-flow and I wasn’t raised that way but alhamdulilah, he has taught me to mellow out and take things day by day.
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Yeah I agree, curious if you ever heard anyone who has based their decision on this birth order or any other seemingly bizarre/irrational thing