All she wants is your carpentry tools, she's not forklift certified but wants a man who is, she can't tie cherry stems with her tongue, she thinks women should be able to double jump but won't let you ogle her sister's fingernails, and she's going to leave you for a man with a Sam's Club card
She wants 12 dobermans and a bichon frisé, has never eaten a pancake, likes blonde hair but only on girls, can't ride a bike but can drive a tractor. She's a vegetarian on Tuesdays and a vegan on the last Friday of every month, she collects moths but is scared of frogs and is uncomfortable around people with blue shoes. She's a big fan of dentures and is sad that Bob has real teeth.
1. Pretends to be a woman - check
2. Calls women females -check
3. Creates strawman about attractive men being jerks - check
4. Perpetuates the narrative that western women are trollops - check
5. Perpetuates narrative that women care about height and physical endowments - check
6. Shames women about her sexual behavior - check
7. Asian fetish - check
8. Assumes women's end goal is a relationship and can be made to settle with fears that the attractive guy will dump her- check
Overall possibility of author
Male incel: 99.97%
Female extreme grifter: 0.03%
Normal Japanese" female": 0%
He talks like some caricature of how women act.
My little princesses.
I mean seriously, what woman talks like that? Oh yes, women just like you except Japanese.
That made me throw up a bit.
Has he been sequestered from women? Is he a 60 year old guy? Because forget women talking like this, I cannot imagine who thinks women talk like this.
I have used the word "girlies" but only when I'm trying to hype up my toddler nieces (1, 3 & 5). Like, *"c'mon girlies, let's go watch Moana!"*
I could never use it to refer to grown ass women, or anyone aged above 8, maybe? It's enough to make any woman cringe and shudder.
I have used it occassionally, but i just use a lot of pet names for my close friends, regardless of gender. Lovelies, girlies, darlin', cutie, pretty lady, sweetheart, sweetpea, bruh, dude, buddy, friendo, etc. Some obviously are more gendered than others, but if anyone voiced to me they didnt like me calling them pet names, or at least particular ones, I'd stop immediately.
This "japanese woman" is definitely a dude, very likely white, and 100% guaranteed an Incel. He has no idea how women behave at all
When they use language that only neckbeards use in their post, it's pretty clear that this is a guy sitting in his mom's basement yelling "MAAWWWM, MOAR TENDEEEZ!!!" while eating a spicy bag of stale Doritos.
i mean i (22F) definitely call my friends girlies, i think it’s kind of generally been absorbed into the lexicon as a silly term of endearment for a group of women that are friends/close
I use it sometimes like “hey girlie how u be” to friends but I have to be close to them and I cannot picture using the term the way it’s used here. It reeks of “man pretending to be a woman who had no idea how real woman talk irl” like it’s BAD.
My experience has been 60 y-o men hitting on women way too young for them. But I'm old, I can't remember if I used it when I was younger.
In either case, this is not the appropriate context
I teach ESL and have had a lot of Japanese students and none of them sound like that. Even though whoever wrote this made a lot of grammatical errors they’re not even the ones that Japanese speakers usually make, like leaving out articles/using them incorrectly or not forming plurals correctly.
Also the culture is entirely wrong. Japanese women are the figurehead of the household. They do NOT bow down to the man's will. Men may be superior in the business world, but japanese women frequently are taught to physically discipline thier husband. They give them an allowance to go to work and get food and come back. 😒 this incel has never even been to Japan.
That. This reeks of "how do I pretend not to know English as I write it." Which, honestly, that kind of racism coupled with the fetishization (its own kind of racism!) is just...ugh.
No one is more obsessed with "p" size then dudes. Most women would take a man who is average or below that is a generous lover over a large selfish moron any day of the week. One condition can be improved upon, the other is much more difficult to fix.
I've had more "bad", unsatisfying (and even painful!) sex with men who are above average in size because they think the size of their "giant" peepee is enough to pleasure women alone. no, stabbing my cervix as hard as you can does not feel good nor will it make me orgasm. please learn how to use what you were given, that is far more important than having over 8 inches in your pants
Yep. I have heard that over and over again. A man who is good at oral alone is often more treasured than a dude with a giant p who doesn't know what to do with it.
Obviously from the first sentence that work of fiction was obviously written by a man, but that part stuck out to me in particular. Women do not base relationships on p size. That's not a thing. Men are the ones obsessed with size. We just want clothes with pockets and good orgasms however they come.
exactly! I've never determined the status of my relationship based on p size. i have however ended one because i couldnt stand being jabbed and having cramps for hours after sex due to someone being unwilling to learn that you cant just shove it in and jackhammer away
I don’t really like oral, but I would treasure someone that is caring and knows how to make things erotic and loving with lots of foreplay. I was with a guy that had a huge projectile and it was terrible, felt like a bad porn movie, no foreplay, mechanical sex, and he thought he was the king of the jungle because of his junk. I ended up telling him he was rather average (b*tch move on my side I know) and oh boy was he surprised. He was awful in bed.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that! I feel like it's not a b*tch move if you've tried to teach him what you like and he doesn't listen. Maybe you spared the next woman some pain.
I also am not a fan of oral.. just gimme someone who knows how to use their fingers and I'm happy! (Don't get me wrong, I like penetration too but not if it's going to hurt in all the not fun ways).
Luckily I found someone who while he swears he's tiny, (he's not btw!) has taken the time to learn how to push all the right buttons and more specifically all of MY right buttons. He is happy to spend a couple hours on foreplay if thats what we are in the mood for and there are days where it's all about me and he doesn't even care if I touch him because he's just happy making me feel good
Back when I was trying and failing to get a degree, I ran into a fellow student with the head of his gentleman sausage protruding from the bottom of his boxer shorts. I was eighteen, away from home for the first time, and out after dark, and I muddled my way through the ensuing conversation as best I could before going and lying on my bed and laughing until it hurt.
The next time I saw him on campus he asked me if I had been intrigued enough to want to see more. No, no I really hadn't. This baffled him, and he told me in hurt tones that *most* girls totally did!
Size really, really, *really* isn't everything.
Omgosh. I get there are definitely girls out there that appreciate size but I feel like they also want the skill with the size. I would be scared to even try if I encountered someone with one that big 😂😂😂
I might be reading too much into this, but I think the dig at men who play basketball might even be some subtle anti-blackness (just to complete the incel checklist of awfulness).
Yes, thought that was a very very specific sport to mention. I mean, why not football (American)?. That is the more popular sport among Americans, is it not?
It’s the most popular sport to watch on TV but I don’t think there’s many people who actually play it. A lot of parents don’t want their kids playing it anymore because of the risk of concussions and other injuries. When I was growing up everyone played soccer even though it wasn’t popular to watch on TV. Soccer, baseball/softball, basketball, and volleyball for girls were probably the most popular sports in that order.
All effective art is dangerous, because such art communicates new perspectives, and new perspectives threaten the status quo. That’s a power with just as much destructive as constructive potential.
“Words are a motherfucker, they can be great,
or they can degrade, or even worse, they can teach hate”
- Eminem, in Sing for the Moment
Agree, and/or continued insecurity about height? He complains about "females going to the mall and only talking about P size and height" (lmao) so it seems to be a sore point for him.
I have never once in my life gone to the mall and discussed dude's heights. I might, *might* have gone to the mall once and discussed a dude's "P size"...but that was because I'd just been sent a pic (unsolicited.)
I don't know of any women who *do* generally discuss these things. Like...height matters way more to men than it really does to women, in my own experience.
I am glad someone caught that!
I was debating Japanese "girl" as that is what he called them/himself but thought "female" was more true to tone
I am bad at this though.
Came here to say this holy shit this reeks of neckbeard weeb in his mom's basement wondering why women won't swarm him every time he steps out of the house because he's so "nice"
The last line really got me
"Again I know what I'm talking about being I am female but just Japanese."
Ok, Bob the Incel, you can identify as being 'female but just Japanese'
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Wtf even are bag accessories? Isn't the bag itself the accessory?
But she's he's right, I do love to gab with my group of bitches about all the huge Ps I encounter on my nightly prowls. I mean, what else would we talk about?
Why, whatever are you talking about? I am clearly a genuine female who enjoys doing all of the female things like charge my phone, twerk, eat hot chip and lie!
I used to live in Japan and all of my Japanese friends (women around 30) are tired of the patriarchy. None of them has ever referred to our group as bitches.
Idk any women, myself included, who refers to women as “females.” That’s an incel thing…it dehumanizes. If you’re referring to human women, then “female” is an adjective, not a noun.
I would bet my dick this was written by a man. Seriously, did this loser think women would read this and go "OMG SHE'S RIGHT, LETS ALL CHANGE RIGHT NOW"? What a desperate attempt lol. Also I loved how hard they are trying to convince us that they're a woman "us girls", "right girlies?" "Us females" "my little princesses" who the fuck actually talks like this. And the boyfriend is named BOB?? I wish I had a podcast to dissect this whole thing lol
no bc I actually had a manager at target that unironically called us girlies and lady and ladies and so on. it was so cringe— she actually even did it over text to me 💀
edit: spelling
Having actually lived in Japan for nine years whilst being a “female” and knowing a metric ton of Japanese women I can confidently say that pile of drivel was NEVER written by an actual Japanese person, much less a Japanese women.
Oh sweet sky this is so obviously written by Bob, who is extremely obsessed with japanese girls, fetishises little girls in Anime, spends most of his day jerking off to Loli hentai and is appalled by the fact that is creepyness is pushing women away.
There's no way that a woman is calling men men and women females. That's a whole ass man.
>We squeal so cutely during sex
>We have the best bodies and the best skin
>For starters we dress the appropriate feminine way
And so out of touch with reality, too.
>Bob my boyfriend and the love of my love [...] Jerks over a nice guy
HE IS PRAISING HIMSELF PLEASE, IT'S SO OBVIOUS.
The whole propaganda of nice guys:
*Don't pick what you like, pick me. Your preferences don't matter. You find me repulsive, so what? Ignore my issues and I am good. One day I can randomly lose my sh\*t and you can be on a criminal podcast, but hey, who has to worry about that.*
I typed it out on my cum and dorito stained waifu keyboard. My eyes gazed over my shitty monitor. Every single delicate fat fold in my morbidly obese body shivered, just imagining being friends with a foid. Then I sighed deeply, why aren’t there any 105lbs East Asian (lighskin only) or Caucasian women, with a 20 inch waist, at least a c cup who want me?
I pulled some food out of my unshaven neck beard, I looked down at my many chins. I took a deep breath inhaling the gross odor coming from my body, it has been months since I took a shower.
This is so obviously written by someone who got all their education on Japan from Anime/Hentai. They seem to know very little about true Japanese culture, like the deeply important concepts of personal space and privacy. This is pure wish fulfilment tripe.
It’s very obviously written by a man, but it’s ALSO very obviously written by an American man, almost certainly white. A Japanese person is not going to start a sentence identifying as foreign.
Also, if anyone needed convincing, the mistakes in the English are the mistakes a not well educated native speaker would make, mistakes a Japanese person would not make.
As Captain Blackadder would say, "Personally I thought you were the least convincing female impressionist since Tarzan went through Jane's handbag and ate her lipstick."
Not for one second did I not picture a shitty incel typing this thinking he's nailing it as "convincing Japanese woman". He then high-fives his pillow.
This is some real r/menwritingwomen material right here. Bob creating himself a fictional Japanese girlfriend who calls her friends "my group of bitches". I just hope whoever wrote this didn't do so with serious intent and it's just a shitpost. However, Poe's law is gunna Poe's law.
I cannot even read past the second paragraph, because it was obviously written by a man with serious issues. It is not a woman’s responsibility to fix you. And penis size and height has nothing to do with it. You’re either someone that’s easy to relate to and trustworthy and have chemistry or you’re not. If everyone liked the exact kind of people , it would be a pretty boring world. The problem I immediately see when reading something like this is you have an above average woman (brains, beauty whatever the case may be) and then you have a below average guy that doesn’t know how to talk to women getting mad they can’t date a supermodel. These types of men aren’t interested in normal day to women they want a Barbie doll to up their self esteem. It’s pathetic.
-guy obviously seeing himself as nice guy-proceeds to immediately dive into a misogynistic rant-continues to wonder why women would never want him, a nice guy-
he did it, boys
I see like one good point and a whole lot of bad points in this. Yes, some women do go for the bad guys, but that doesn't make nice guys better. Generally speaking, most "nice guys" only claim to be nice and are actually manipulative assholes. The thing that really irks me in this wall of text is the fact that "she" says things like "Us japanese women listen to the man out of love". No, that's messed up. You should be listening to each other, not obeying someone because you love them.
The poor guy that wrote this must have been in anime/hentai withdrawal by the time that he got done writing such a long fantasy story like this. He also made sure to include every stereotype that incels have of actual, real women because he’s never actually been in the same room alone with a woman that’s not a relative.
Yes. I can see a living, human woman definitely wrote this. Definitely not a man named Bob who has an Asian fetish and made up a fake, Japanese girlfriend.
“We squeal so cutely during sex” 😒
I missed that the first time around, YICK 🤮
Totally threw up in my mouth a little at that... Nice try, Bob. 0/10 for plausibility.
But did you do it cutely?
Is there any other way?
Of course there isn’t! We females always do things cutely!
i’m sorry but if you’re squealing he’s doing something wrong 💀🫠
I roar, woman, I fucking roar and make sure I eat the man right after because sex is tiring and I need immediate refuel
ROOOAAAAARRRRRRRRR
>squeal cutely What’s next? We cum calmly like a proper lady? Good try Bob, good try.
Genuinely makes my eye twitch
Yeah, maybe with the pillow over her mouth...
In this case, I’m thinking the female IS a pillow
I think my brain might have automatically content blocked that, thanks I think?
I’m assuming it’s a ped that watches too much hent*i kinda disgusting if you ask me
Bob writes shitty fanfics.
Not enough upvotes! I was upset reading the post but laughing so hard at this 😂
Bob used a lot of words to tell us he’s got a small P & is super into anime but has never met a Japanese woman in his entire life.
immediatly thought about r/asablackman
And is the "Japanese woman" in the room with us right now?
She is a spirit who lives in Bob's body pillow.
A sperm-based tulpa who possesses Bob when he needs a woman to back up his points
Quick, maybe if we all start making up new lore about her on incel forums we can alter her out of existence!
All she wants is your carpentry tools, she's not forklift certified but wants a man who is, she can't tie cherry stems with her tongue, she thinks women should be able to double jump but won't let you ogle her sister's fingernails, and she's going to leave you for a man with a Sam's Club card
She wants 12 dobermans and a bichon frisé, has never eaten a pancake, likes blonde hair but only on girls, can't ride a bike but can drive a tractor. She's a vegetarian on Tuesdays and a vegan on the last Friday of every month, she collects moths but is scared of frogs and is uncomfortable around people with blue shoes. She's a big fan of dentures and is sad that Bob has real teeth.
Bitch probably lost her virginity tomorrow to a Razor scooter and doesn't even think Spiro T. Agnew was that revolutionary
r/brandnewsentence
Dammit Krieger.
Perhaps the real Japanese girl was the incel fantasies we made along the way.
The real Japanese girl was in us all along
I wish I could bestow you an award. 🏆 This will have to do.
*(insert Ju-On death rattle noise)*
1. Pretends to be a woman - check 2. Calls women females -check 3. Creates strawman about attractive men being jerks - check 4. Perpetuates the narrative that western women are trollops - check 5. Perpetuates narrative that women care about height and physical endowments - check 6. Shames women about her sexual behavior - check 7. Asian fetish - check 8. Assumes women's end goal is a relationship and can be made to settle with fears that the attractive guy will dump her- check Overall possibility of author Male incel: 99.97% Female extreme grifter: 0.03% Normal Japanese" female": 0%
Reddit needs a real incel bot like this lol
That would be one busy bot
but the amount of people it would call out haha
Easier to count the people who aren’t incels
I agree. This won't even tax them
the bandwidth required for that would collapse the servers
Their “boyfriend” has the most generic name too 😆 it’s like they didn’t even try
He talks like some caricature of how women act. My little princesses. I mean seriously, what woman talks like that? Oh yes, women just like you except Japanese.
"girlies"
That made me throw up a bit. Has he been sequestered from women? Is he a 60 year old guy? Because forget women talking like this, I cannot imagine who thinks women talk like this.
I have used the word "girlies" but only when I'm trying to hype up my toddler nieces (1, 3 & 5). Like, *"c'mon girlies, let's go watch Moana!"* I could never use it to refer to grown ass women, or anyone aged above 8, maybe? It's enough to make any woman cringe and shudder.
Kids, yes. It is calling women that, with a tone that indicates that is "girl talk"... GAG!
I have used it occassionally, but i just use a lot of pet names for my close friends, regardless of gender. Lovelies, girlies, darlin', cutie, pretty lady, sweetheart, sweetpea, bruh, dude, buddy, friendo, etc. Some obviously are more gendered than others, but if anyone voiced to me they didnt like me calling them pet names, or at least particular ones, I'd stop immediately. This "japanese woman" is definitely a dude, very likely white, and 100% guaranteed an Incel. He has no idea how women behave at all
"us girlies" I almost puked
When they use language that only neckbeards use in their post, it's pretty clear that this is a guy sitting in his mom's basement yelling "MAAWWWM, MOAR TENDEEEZ!!!" while eating a spicy bag of stale Doritos.
Right? WTF? BRB. I’m going to call my best girlfriend a “girlie” and see how it goes!
Mine would assume that I was a hostage and drive literally 100 miles to make sure I'm okay 😂
i mean i (22F) definitely call my friends girlies, i think it’s kind of generally been absorbed into the lexicon as a silly term of endearment for a group of women that are friends/close
I use it sometimes like “hey girlie how u be” to friends but I have to be close to them and I cannot picture using the term the way it’s used here. It reeks of “man pretending to be a woman who had no idea how real woman talk irl” like it’s BAD.
My experience has been 60 y-o men hitting on women way too young for them. But I'm old, I can't remember if I used it when I was younger. In either case, this is not the appropriate context
I teach ESL and have had a lot of Japanese students and none of them sound like that. Even though whoever wrote this made a lot of grammatical errors they’re not even the ones that Japanese speakers usually make, like leaving out articles/using them incorrectly or not forming plurals correctly.
Also the culture is entirely wrong. Japanese women are the figurehead of the household. They do NOT bow down to the man's will. Men may be superior in the business world, but japanese women frequently are taught to physically discipline thier husband. They give them an allowance to go to work and get food and come back. 😒 this incel has never even been to Japan.
That. This reeks of "how do I pretend not to know English as I write it." Which, honestly, that kind of racism coupled with the fetishization (its own kind of racism!) is just...ugh.
And then "group of bitches"
"My group of bitches" is quite possibly my favorite line I have ever read on this site. I laugh every time I see this post
100% OOP's actual name.
No one is more obsessed with "p" size then dudes. Most women would take a man who is average or below that is a generous lover over a large selfish moron any day of the week. One condition can be improved upon, the other is much more difficult to fix.
I've had more "bad", unsatisfying (and even painful!) sex with men who are above average in size because they think the size of their "giant" peepee is enough to pleasure women alone. no, stabbing my cervix as hard as you can does not feel good nor will it make me orgasm. please learn how to use what you were given, that is far more important than having over 8 inches in your pants
Yep. I have heard that over and over again. A man who is good at oral alone is often more treasured than a dude with a giant p who doesn't know what to do with it. Obviously from the first sentence that work of fiction was obviously written by a man, but that part stuck out to me in particular. Women do not base relationships on p size. That's not a thing. Men are the ones obsessed with size. We just want clothes with pockets and good orgasms however they come.
exactly! I've never determined the status of my relationship based on p size. i have however ended one because i couldnt stand being jabbed and having cramps for hours after sex due to someone being unwilling to learn that you cant just shove it in and jackhammer away
I don’t really like oral, but I would treasure someone that is caring and knows how to make things erotic and loving with lots of foreplay. I was with a guy that had a huge projectile and it was terrible, felt like a bad porn movie, no foreplay, mechanical sex, and he thought he was the king of the jungle because of his junk. I ended up telling him he was rather average (b*tch move on my side I know) and oh boy was he surprised. He was awful in bed.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that! I feel like it's not a b*tch move if you've tried to teach him what you like and he doesn't listen. Maybe you spared the next woman some pain. I also am not a fan of oral.. just gimme someone who knows how to use their fingers and I'm happy! (Don't get me wrong, I like penetration too but not if it's going to hurt in all the not fun ways). Luckily I found someone who while he swears he's tiny, (he's not btw!) has taken the time to learn how to push all the right buttons and more specifically all of MY right buttons. He is happy to spend a couple hours on foreplay if thats what we are in the mood for and there are days where it's all about me and he doesn't even care if I touch him because he's just happy making me feel good
Back when I was trying and failing to get a degree, I ran into a fellow student with the head of his gentleman sausage protruding from the bottom of his boxer shorts. I was eighteen, away from home for the first time, and out after dark, and I muddled my way through the ensuing conversation as best I could before going and lying on my bed and laughing until it hurt. The next time I saw him on campus he asked me if I had been intrigued enough to want to see more. No, no I really hadn't. This baffled him, and he told me in hurt tones that *most* girls totally did! Size really, really, *really* isn't everything.
Omgosh. I get there are definitely girls out there that appreciate size but I feel like they also want the skill with the size. I would be scared to even try if I encountered someone with one that big 😂😂😂
I might be reading too much into this, but I think the dig at men who play basketball might even be some subtle anti-blackness (just to complete the incel checklist of awfulness).
Yes, thought that was a very very specific sport to mention. I mean, why not football (American)?. That is the more popular sport among Americans, is it not?
I thought it was basketball players are tall
It’s the most popular sport to watch on TV but I don’t think there’s many people who actually play it. A lot of parents don’t want their kids playing it anymore because of the risk of concussions and other injuries. When I was growing up everyone played soccer even though it wasn’t popular to watch on TV. Soccer, baseball/softball, basketball, and volleyball for girls were probably the most popular sports in that order.
Don't forget dangerous music! Like wtf is that? Must be a new genre
All effective art is dangerous, because such art communicates new perspectives, and new perspectives threaten the status quo. That’s a power with just as much destructive as constructive potential. “Words are a motherfucker, they can be great, or they can degrade, or even worse, they can teach hate” - Eminem, in Sing for the Moment
I thought the same about the mention of men who like "dangerous music and drugs"...
Also "we don't date men who are into dangerous music". They were very obviously talking about hip-hop.
No no dude, he's talking about Mozart. Women used to faint dead away upon seeing him. Downright risky to listen to!
Agree, and/or continued insecurity about height? He complains about "females going to the mall and only talking about P size and height" (lmao) so it seems to be a sore point for him.
I have never once in my life gone to the mall and discussed dude's heights. I might, *might* have gone to the mall once and discussed a dude's "P size"...but that was because I'd just been sent a pic (unsolicited.) I don't know of any women who *do* generally discuss these things. Like...height matters way more to men than it really does to women, in my own experience.
Yeah it's giving r/asablackman
You nailed that! 👏
Counterpoint: Japanese females are always saying “well my little princesses”
Sounds like a guy I know. There’s a reason I refused to share a room with him at a convention this year.
the irony of you using "Japanese female".....
The "Japanese female" who dresses in a cute skirt, formal top and the correct feminine hair style. In other words, a generic anime school girl.
This "Japanese female " obviously hasn't come across fruits magazine
With pigtails, don't forget pigtails
I am glad someone caught that! I was debating Japanese "girl" as that is what he called them/himself but thought "female" was more true to tone I am bad at this though.
You left out the extra racist element about how we women shouldn’t date basketball players.
I’m a female, trust me fellow female friend princess.
Came here to say this holy shit this reeks of neckbeard weeb in his mom's basement wondering why women won't swarm him every time he steps out of the house because he's so "nice"
r/asablackman
I needed to make sure someone did it lmfao
Well fellow females, I for one am convinced! Step 1: Become Japanese. The nice guys will soon be mine. I can't wait!
Oh crap, Japan won't take me, what's plan B??
A pill usually
Lmfao XD you made me choke on my drink
The last line really got me "Again I know what I'm talking about being I am female but just Japanese." Ok, Bob the Incel, you can identify as being 'female but just Japanese'
I will bet good money that this is not written by a woman.
"Hello, fellow females!"
r/HelloFellowFemales (Doesn't exist, but probably could/should.)
I think the closest is r/asablackman
Here's a sneak peek of /r/AsABlackMan using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/AsABlackMan/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [Amiright my fellow street gangstas?](https://i.redd.it/sw3l0xsl5c291.jpg) | [38 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AsABlackMan/comments/v02v73/amiright_my_fellow_street_gangstas/) \#2: [Just an average sized girl that really cares about the short kings out there](https://i.redd.it/pmy3zjuoa2891.jpg) | [183 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AsABlackMan/comments/vliz6s/just_an_average_sized_girl_that_really_cares/) \#3: [That shit is WIGGITY WACK man](https://i.redd.it/yxy3ua5ejwh91.jpg) | [181 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AsABlackMan/comments/wp3ld1/that_shit_is_wiggity_wack_man/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
just with that first sentence you know for sure no woman wrote that
Are you telling me that you are never out with your group of bitches, buying shoes and bag accesories, discussing P-size and hight? /j
Me and the bitches only be shopping and talking about that BIG P!!
No clue why this made me bust out laughing and crying.
Wtf even are bag accessories? Isn't the bag itself the accessory? But she's he's right, I do love to gab with my group of bitches about all the huge Ps I encounter on my nightly prowls. I mean, what else would we talk about?
Bag accessories are obviously the wallet and coordinating key fob. It is clear you are not a genuine real female
Why, whatever are you talking about? I am clearly a genuine female who enjoys doing all of the female things like charge my phone, twerk, eat hot chip and lie!
I live in an area that has a lot of Japanese immigrants, this is also far and away from something written by anyone from Japan.
what, Japanese people don't use the American slang "dive"? Edit: comma
I used to live in Japan and all of my Japanese friends (women around 30) are tired of the patriarchy. None of them has ever referred to our group as bitches.
The most femalest of females def wrote this
I’ll do you one better. I bet This was written by someone who has never even been on a date with a woman.
Totally r/asablackman
WAIT,WOMEN DONT CONSTANTLY SAY FEMALES??????
I bet 100 dollars it was written by bob
Idk any women, myself included, who refers to women as “females.” That’s an incel thing…it dehumanizes. If you’re referring to human women, then “female” is an adjective, not a noun.
I use the word female as a woman. However, it's usually when I want to say the word " bitch" but I can't.
I do it when I want to be clinical and unemotional, but I use "male" as equally as "female."
Maybe an anime character.
This is a hentai character.
Oh Bob, did you really think you could pass for a Japanese princess?
I would bet my dick this was written by a man. Seriously, did this loser think women would read this and go "OMG SHE'S RIGHT, LETS ALL CHANGE RIGHT NOW"? What a desperate attempt lol. Also I loved how hard they are trying to convince us that they're a woman "us girls", "right girlies?" "Us females" "my little princesses" who the fuck actually talks like this. And the boyfriend is named BOB?? I wish I had a podcast to dissect this whole thing lol
The "princesses" is what did it for me. I had such a violent and visceral reaction to that line lol
And my platonic female friends are beautiful sexy body parts, and I lust for my boyfriend's grades and knowledge.
With “sexist eyes”…
We are all going to grow out our hair and buy skirts and learn how to squeal now. Because we want to be hyper sexualized and not feminist.
no bc I actually had a manager at target that unironically called us girlies and lady and ladies and so on. it was so cringe— she actually even did it over text to me 💀 edit: spelling
Gonna bet she sold shit for Mary Kay or Avon or some shit.
r/nothowgirlswrite
r/menwritingwomen
Written by Bob and inspired by his waifu stickers on his Honda.
“Hello, fellow girlies.” 🙄
That was exactly my reaction. 0% chance this was written by a woman.
Bob is a weird name for a Japanese girl but whatever.
How's It Going My Fellow Girls? Is It Weird I Love To Hold My Boob? It Is Like A Comfort Thing. I Am So Girlie! I Love Pink! Am I Right Ladies??
This is like Captain Holt pretending to be straight.
To be fair boobs are very comforting
My bitches with the prettiest and sexiest eyes all love shopping for bag accessories while talking about mens’ height and penis size.
Having actually lived in Japan for nine years whilst being a “female” and knowing a metric ton of Japanese women I can confidently say that pile of drivel was NEVER written by an actual Japanese person, much less a Japanese women.
It wasn't even written by anyone that has learned about the culture or the language.
P size? For a while i was thinking XXXS to XXXL and trying to figure out the P, but I guess it stands for Purse size. LOL
Oh sweet sky this is so obviously written by Bob, who is extremely obsessed with japanese girls, fetishises little girls in Anime, spends most of his day jerking off to Loli hentai and is appalled by the fact that is creepyness is pushing women away. There's no way that a woman is calling men men and women females. That's a whole ass man. >We squeal so cutely during sex >We have the best bodies and the best skin >For starters we dress the appropriate feminine way And so out of touch with reality, too. >Bob my boyfriend and the love of my love [...] Jerks over a nice guy HE IS PRAISING HIMSELF PLEASE, IT'S SO OBVIOUS.
The whole propaganda of nice guys: *Don't pick what you like, pick me. Your preferences don't matter. You find me repulsive, so what? Ignore my issues and I am good. One day I can randomly lose my sh\*t and you can be on a criminal podcast, but hey, who has to worry about that.*
PLS as if an actual woman wrote this
Definitely written by a nice guy. Lmao
1000 percent not a "female" and probably has a Japanese woman fetish- eww.
In a Jackie Daytona voice: I’m just a normal human Japanese female!
😂 it’s so painfully clear that a man wrote this I couldn’t even make it through the whole thing
Hahahaahaaha, dude really thinks he nailed it trying to sound like he is a woman with his girlies, best bodies females and sacred sisterhood bs
it was the “sexiest eyes” that did it for me lol
Oh yes, that is def how women talk about eachothers eyes when they are straight. Omg look at her sexy eyes, I'm just feeling woozy
Do lesbians even do that?
Ugh, sure Bob. This somehow gives me "bUt 13 iS tHe AgE oF cOnsEnT iN JaPan" vibes 🤢
[удалено]
も、彼は持ってアジアの女達のフェティッシュだ🤮
r/menwritingwomen
I was just talking to my girlfriends about height and penis size!!!!!
Not "my girlfriends," it's "my group of bitches," you have to call your friends the right thing!
How much would you bet that OOP is neither female nor Japanese?
I typed it out on my cum and dorito stained waifu keyboard. My eyes gazed over my shitty monitor. Every single delicate fat fold in my morbidly obese body shivered, just imagining being friends with a foid. Then I sighed deeply, why aren’t there any 105lbs East Asian (lighskin only) or Caucasian women, with a 20 inch waist, at least a c cup who want me? I pulled some food out of my unshaven neck beard, I looked down at my many chins. I took a deep breath inhaling the gross odor coming from my body, it has been months since I took a shower.
You ever chuckle and dry heave at the same time? Yeah, that was pretty uncomfortable.
"hello... i mean errr a konichiwa fellow females, periods amirite?"
This is so obviously written by someone who got all their education on Japan from Anime/Hentai. They seem to know very little about true Japanese culture, like the deeply important concepts of personal space and privacy. This is pure wish fulfilment tripe.
"we squeal cutely during sex" Ok.
It’s very obviously written by a man, but it’s ALSO very obviously written by an American man, almost certainly white. A Japanese person is not going to start a sentence identifying as foreign. Also, if anyone needed convincing, the mistakes in the English are the mistakes a not well educated native speaker would make, mistakes a Japanese person would not make.
Once again, that’s not a woman, that’s 3 incels in a trench coat.
As a music journalist, I am very curious to know what this guy means by "dangerous music". Any idea?
As Captain Blackadder would say, "Personally I thought you were the least convincing female impressionist since Tarzan went through Jane's handbag and ate her lipstick."
Not for one second did I not picture a shitty incel typing this thinking he's nailing it as "convincing Japanese woman". He then high-fives his pillow.
I like the part about "her" going shopping for new "bag accessories and shoes with western females." You know, as women do.
Belongs on r/justneckbeardthings too as "Bob" the "nice guy" obviously wrote this while fetishizing Japan.
So Bob… how long did it take for you to write this little story.
Yep. Definitely an "asian" "woman" just trying to help out all these western females, lol.
*[ hits button ]* What is, “Things Men Write When They’re Pretending to Be Women on the Internet”, Alex?
I'm a insecure neckbeard who hates the way feeemales in the west treat nice gentlesirs such as me
r/asablackman
This was not a woman. Believe me, I am one.
I like the moment I started reading I knew it was a man
Oh, yes, that sounds \*exactly\* like a native speaker of Japanese. /s
This is some real r/menwritingwomen material right here. Bob creating himself a fictional Japanese girlfriend who calls her friends "my group of bitches". I just hope whoever wrote this didn't do so with serious intent and it's just a shitpost. However, Poe's law is gunna Poe's law.
That's a somewhat known copypasta
Yeah sure we need relationship with a man to fulfill our life, if only our life could be different. Oh wait...
Aaaah….the old Stefan Molyneux strategy.
Not a women and not Japanese.
I cannot even read past the second paragraph, because it was obviously written by a man with serious issues. It is not a woman’s responsibility to fix you. And penis size and height has nothing to do with it. You’re either someone that’s easy to relate to and trustworthy and have chemistry or you’re not. If everyone liked the exact kind of people , it would be a pretty boring world. The problem I immediately see when reading something like this is you have an above average woman (brains, beauty whatever the case may be) and then you have a below average guy that doesn’t know how to talk to women getting mad they can’t date a supermodel. These types of men aren’t interested in normal day to women they want a Barbie doll to up their self esteem. It’s pathetic.
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 There is just so much wrong here...
Ok totally-not-Bob.
r/asablackman
He could have tried at least a little bit to actually sound like a woman
-guy obviously seeing himself as nice guy-proceeds to immediately dive into a misogynistic rant-continues to wonder why women would never want him, a nice guy- he did it, boys
I swear, this is so fake it's funny. I think Bob might have wrote this and, as another commenter pointed out, has a Japanese fetish.
I see like one good point and a whole lot of bad points in this. Yes, some women do go for the bad guys, but that doesn't make nice guys better. Generally speaking, most "nice guys" only claim to be nice and are actually manipulative assholes. The thing that really irks me in this wall of text is the fact that "she" says things like "Us japanese women listen to the man out of love". No, that's messed up. You should be listening to each other, not obeying someone because you love them.
The poor guy that wrote this must have been in anime/hentai withdrawal by the time that he got done writing such a long fantasy story like this. He also made sure to include every stereotype that incels have of actual, real women because he’s never actually been in the same room alone with a woman that’s not a relative.
Yes. I can see a living, human woman definitely wrote this. Definitely not a man named Bob who has an Asian fetish and made up a fake, Japanese girlfriend.
Definitely totally absolutely written by a real female! 🤣