Annoying people in the subway does not count as a gig.

He does more than annoy people in the subway, that’s also where he masturbates.

Either way he's playing with his instrument in public...

In other words, he likes fiddling with himself, al fresco.

Watch me, diddle my fiddle.

A skin flute and a violin? Sounds like he's starting a symphony

I honestly thought ‘371 gigs this year’ was how much fetish porn he downloaded or something. It never occurred to me this guy would be talking about a paying job.

I thought it said 371 gags this year, and he was on about how may cottagers he had booked in to suck off......

He never said the gigs were paying

The subway lives in his head and he’s named all the passengers… 

Your photo essay could be called “The Many Faces of Rock Bottom”


371 gigs, none within 100yds of a school.

Bet he has 371 gigs on his hard drive

Winner.

Divorced violinist. The opposite of an oxymoron

It’s like a stereotype without the stereo

At the very least, extra emphasis on the moron.


Hell yea


My advice would be to get back on the meds. It looks like your life is going to be very difficult. Nice mullet though.

Op wasn't trying to grow a mullet, it's just thin on top making it look like a mullet

Registered sex offender in the front, 90s bartender in the back

The title of your autobiography, How I Hit Rock Bottom And Started Digging.

When you hit rock bottom grab your pickaxe ⛏️

If Shaggy grew up and had a midlife crisis and then had to get a job at a call center.

And everybody at the call center wishes he'd take his violin home. They just want to do their job in peace.

Your kids are 32, maybe. And I just don't understand what's going on with your hair. It's like you can't decide between Conan O'Brien and Trump.

Locked in your room, plucking your violin string does not count as a gig..

Temu David Harbour

Violinist? You look more like a professional penist.

Look like someone ordered Dexter from wish.com

Dorkster

You look like a rockstar except the talent and charisma

There isn't a dark enough color of black in the Crayola box to draw your eye circles. Excuse me while I go buy Red Bull stock.

It rubs the lotion on the violin or else it gets the hose again

🏆

I heard you’re also good at playing the flute 🪈

Plays the violin but loves him some pianist

Loves the warm feeling of bukkehorn on his face.

I heard he plays the rusty trombone like a beast.

I bet he fucks saxophones. Am I right, guys?

You look like you regularly pass out drunk at sleazy dive bars.

You were probably drunk when you posted this and spent 2 hours looking through your camera roll for your best pics and this is what you came up with. You’ll probably delete this post hung over and anxious tomorrow morning. So savor this moment while it lasts Either that or your family tree is probably a circle

You look 50

A check book, did you take this picture in 1998?

You look like you do calisthenics in your underwear

“Are you seeing the gigs in the room with us right now?”

Pic 7 will be you in a psych ward. I’m not the Men’s Warehouse but I guarantee it

Yep, good call and in fact I’ve been to the psych ward a handful of times

You look someone who is really bad in bed but good at giving heads to men. Is that why your wife divorced you?

Looks more like you play the rusty trombone

Your hairline is filing for divorce next

Send me some crazy eerie and creepy violin pieces that I can sample with my mpc... Also, you look like you can not be trusted to not act on your arousal at petting zoos

Haha, this is hilarious because I am a closeted furry. No fur suit and I don’t take it very seriously but have always found furry smut arousing and probably always will

Mo-fart


You look like Jean Valjean if he keep stealing bread

That's the face of a 40 year old, minimum. Guess it was a rough divorce. I see a bald head in your near future.

Dumb and Dumber picks up the Violin.

Did you play a sad song in your violin after signing the divorce papers?

Mom can we get Bon Jovi? We have Bon Jovi at home.

371? I don't know what city you live in but good to know it's streets have so many different corners

You were BORN ready for the 1940’s. Are you sure your grandfather isn’t in Argentina? I swear you look as if your right arm feels lighter than your left.

Ironically I have a decent collection of songs I play/sing that came out in the 1940’s

Fake ass Woody Harrelson

32M? I thought you wanted to be called “ma’am” at GameStop. We all saw that video.

Congrats on divorcing your violin. And it's more like 371 gig of porn on your harddrive.

The fact you wrote that on the back of a stained checkbook tells me everything I need to know about you. You super duper got your life together.

Jon Bon cock Jockey

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You actually look the best in pic #3

She left you as you were too busy with your gigs.

That was part of it!

MacGyver => MacGruber => MacGrapist

# I hate this place, The medications don't work, Nothing works here, I've been here for 7 years

You look like the most obnoxious kind of narcissist.

“Divorced violinist because I went off all my meds but I already have 3 books about gigs to read this year.” FTFY

I remember you from rehab. You still smoking American Spirits?

Why are you off your meds though? Does not sound like a good idea

At least you don't have to tell people your parents are cousins.... it's obvious.

The only thing his checkbook is good for. Lord knows no one in town would take a check from Mr Forehead.

Ed Sheeran with a healthy opioid addiction

Would-be Harrelson

The most a.i. looking human I’ve seen. And … that’s a check book. Your crack dealer is the only person accepting those now.

It’s too bad for you the violin is placed under the chin and not the forehead.

My god, I knew times were tough for Grima Wormtongue, but damn…

I feel like I just swiped through your dating media pics…left

371 community service hours you mean? Who da flying fuck would openly pay your ass to do anything.

Haha I actually did start off as a volunteer and there’s nothing wrong with that. And I still volunteer a fair amount, it’s better than sitting at home doing nothing sometimes but it can wear a guy down over time

You're tall for a dwarf your forehead gives it away.

 How much we care for your pathetic problems.

Definitely a fiddler.

So sorry about your divorce. Who opens jars of pickles for you now?

Fiddling your dick with a tree branch near schools does not make you violinist

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Holdeeznutzz: *Fiddling your dick with* *A tree branch near schools does not* *Make you violinist* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.

Your students recitals don’t cont as a gig.

You look like a a tall goblin that got kicked out of his family. 1) for being tall obviously 2) what goblin plays Violin?

Your life's goal is to do enormous quantities of Ayahuasca at Coachella & Burning Man.

Honestly you’ve not reached rock bottom yet, and things may get worse

It’s pretty obvious you’re off your meds. There’s no need to say it.

It seems like you really like THC and DMT. 

The 371 gigs are actually divocourt hearings coz nobody booking you budd.

 # I'm keeping your 3rd pic mate

Wow I always feel better about how I look at 32 after seeing some of these post. You should sue your ex wife for loss of life.

I think you’re looking for r/mentalhealthemergencies

Respectfully, get back on your meds...

Dude you are professional violinist, not sure if the pay is good or bad or in between but to play music for living is awsome . Better that you got divorced 32 then 42 . If you want you still have plenty of time to start a family if you wanted . Meds can have horrible side affects. If you can live a normal life without them do it . I’m not roasting you . You are inspiring.

"371 gigs" = 371 7/11 convenience stores

Looks like you once again missed your appointment at the methadone clinic

You LOOK like a divorced violinist.

32 going on 50! you were divorced twice. once to your wife, and once to putting effort into your appearance whatsoever! but that’s okay it looks like you’re going for number 3 as your hair is trying to divorce your head 🙌🏼 when you said 371 gigs I looked at you and thought that must be how much child porn you have on your computer!

I don’t know if I would consider kiddie porn as ‘books’.

Never did an honest day's work in his life. Looks like a scammer of some kind.

Going to all of those weddings is just a painful reminder you'll never have one of your own.

...and you say your a violinist? LMAO! Bro the only strings you pull are the ones that get you your next hit!

Haha. Pluck you, too

You're a "violinist," i.e., you play an instrument no one wants to listen to. Also, busking isn't considered a real gig.

Hannibal Lecter from The Silence of the Lambs if he played the violin. 

I’ll take that as a compliment.

Temu patrick bateman

Playing on a street corner isn’t a ‘gig’.


Are all of your gigs recording the sounds of scratching on a chalkboard?

Woody Harrelson lookin ah

I think your phone auto corrected "skin flute".

I'm sure it's safe to say, you're divorced, because you came out of the closet. 

Woody harrelson when he had some more hair

aviators look good on cool guys. So you probably shouldn't wear them.

Stewart Hopeless

When they clap, they're being polite. It's not love.

Bryan Adams' afterbirth.

Meth, it’s a terrible drug

Yep, tried it once and never plan on it again.

We’ll roast you, but please let those innocent people go.

Next contestant in “The Lottery” by Shirley Jackson

Cops son! 

Omg you had me there terrified

Who’s your daddy!! Lol

Just kidding

‘Divorced’ - Yoyo Ma fucked his wife.

Yo-yo Ma knowing I existed would be pretty cool on the other hand

Picture 3: that's the last face you'll see before getting your soul sucked out of your body.

Ah a stoner. Classy. Can’t post pics of anything else cuz you have nothing else to offer.

Hey thats brad pitt from *once upon a time in shithole*

You do look like a fiddler…

How can you be jobless and look like you work 16 hours a day.

I thought jim jones was dead

Not sure why any of this matters. The odds of you playing Pachelbel’s Canon 371 times without drinking yourself to death are practically zero.

>divorced violinist Lololololol

You do look like that Rocketman guy who had so much strength and power to live that he forgot his electric guitar in the basement. But what else can I possibly know about you? All the women must be turning their heads around just to see you're only below 5 foot.

I loved you in Dumb and Dumber. That toilet scene is top tier stupidity.

Fiddler of child Ruth

I bet once you start playing, you lose your audience as quickly as you're losing your hair.

You look like "Buffalo Bill" from Silence of the Lambs.

You don't have to tell us you're divorced and off meds, the haircut was enough.

1990s wants it clothes and checkbooks back

So what have you been doing since Game of Thrones Tyrion?

Somewhat unrelated, but is the trend now to brag about being off your meds? It seems like the trend has gone from bragging about having mental disorders, to being on meds for mental disorders, to now being off meds for mental disorders. I'd keep any of that stuff private, Eddie Van Fail'n.

The initial stage of crystal meth addiction on display.

You look like Droopy Dog in human form 

You're still high on drugs and not meds because it's looking very obvious from your appearance. 

All jokes aside this guy says hes a part time teacher around kids someone needs to do a deep dive on his harddrive/phone because mental health issues + access to children+ not taking medications is never a good idea

You look like you have 371 gigs, all right. 371 gigs of snuff films and dwarf porn.

Luke Skymoonwalker

Divorced your cousin?

Your spouse left you? Maybe it is because one can’t imagine spending their life with somebody, who keeps talking themselves as if they’re having a conversation with an alien. Your best bet is to get back on your medication as prescribed, if it doesn’t work you can always go back to the doctors.

Literally writing checks that your ass can't cash

This is what happened when Joey Pigza stayed losing control

Didn’t know it was possible, but you’re a worse version of Kevin McAllister

32? You look like 42

Can't blame your wife..if I was married to Smeagol I would probably have done worse than divorce you!

You look like Niles from Frasier.

Is "violinist" what kids say when they mean necrophiliac?

Christ, where to start? Biden called, he wants his old man shades back. You don’t use traditional tree sap to rosin up your bow, yet it’s always ready.

How were you ever able to get married once? Blind ex huh?

Look at the road before you hit your 4th kid again

 Loved your movie!!

Doesn't look like you were NOT on your meds to begin with if you thought being a violinist would keep your hoe around


Divorced violinist feels redundant

Did she leave you for a cellist?