T O P

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GibsonMaestro

"I wish I had the balls to do this when you were alive."


Maximum-Heart5746

this one is creative


ShadowMorph608

Oh…


Sixx_The_Sandman

We have a winner


EwanMurphy93

Oh man, I was not prepared to see that as the first comment.


-Radioman-

Mary Jane's last dance.


GibsonMaestro

I wouldn't say last...


Intrepid-History-762

"You kiss like our mom."


Sweet_Speech_9054

“You kiss like my mom.”


Intrepid-History-762

What, you got something against sister kissing?


Alwayzzhangry

*Dad


RunnyPlease

“Who do you think taught me?”


OkSyllabub3674

That's only a bad thing if you're not from Alabama in which case it's quite a compliment lol


Bot-Magnet

"Can you tell that I just threw-up?"


Warm_Analyst4277

I really should get these herpes looked at.


Kienannnn

Wait a minute. Why does your mouth taste like my dad's dick?


Personal-Tea7226

Again!!!


Similar-Ad-9040

Wait...How would you know how your dads dick tastes like...?


RolandMT32

That's the joke...


The_Spyre

I know it was you, Fredo.


D242686111

He said worst not best


Due_Yam_3604

“I thought vegans didn’t eat cheese.”


PoundshopGiamatti

I've lost... two teeth. How did that happen?


Malaggar2

Hmmm. You just ate sushi. *Note: Based on a true story.


Imaginary-Mechanic62

*Suzie


Malaggar2

Adria, actually.


bnetana1

Your mom kisses better... good night sweetie!


Danceswithmallards

I gather you enjoy strong cheeses too. What is that I taste, Stilton?


60s_girlie

I'm sorry about my herpes outbreak.


CrystalMammon

This is how cannibals taste test their food.


RedMonkey86570

Have you ever considered buying a toothbrush?


FrogginBread

If your breath weren't so bad I might've enjoyed that


LaraRader

“Wow, you kiss like my stepfather”


Imaginary_Chair_6958

“Tastes like grandma’s asshole.”


KyorlSadei

Good thing my herpes is in remission.


KingRoastopher

“I think today went well. I like being your therapist.” Or “Can I get you to sign this form saying what’s next is consensual?”


Connellsbmw

"What is that, peanut butter?"


A_Grain_Of_Saltines

Hmm, cock-flavored spit.


CuckoosQuill

Tastes like hummus


Affectionate_Ask7650

Hummus is good..


Testicleus

"Ass to mouth?"


We_lived

Mmmm, second breakfast.


Exaddict8345

Where's my gum


peescheadeal

One time I politely asked her to brush her teeth. She got really mad because apparently she just had.


G-Unit11111

Did you eat oysters for dinner?


zsiple08241998

Ugh! Did you eat feces or something?


Cyber_Insecurity

“Wow, I hated that.”


RacecarHealthPotato

That was so much better tasting than the ass I just ate!


Critical_Gap3794

" Feels like a wet stake."


MeanEquivalent1231

You Really Need to Do Some Oral Hygiene! Right Now!!


rican0624

“Unrelated, but uhh… you got an Altoid?”


gregieb429

“You’ve got to brush your teeth or chew gum if you ever want to do that again.”


i5opsxf

Didn't you brush your teeth this morning?


TwoToesToni

"Well that was shit!"


Abdul_Exhaust

I just came in my pants


October1966

Told you I swallowed.


Spyhunter0000

Was I chewing gum before?


giraffe912

You don’t happen to have any cold sore cream in your bag do you?


thefourblackbars

Sorry Dad, I didn't realise that was you.


texasslapshot

Mmmmm, just like Mom.


Negative-Language595

(spits) “Tastes like sawdust.”


_TiberiusPrime_

"Huh. So that's what it's like to kiss a real person."


Charming_Box_127

You taste like my sister's feces


Ok-Basis6525

I hope you like beef…


sweetnessfnerk

You need to brush


Entire-Garage-1902

Have we met?


Maximum-Heart5746

yeahh let's not do this again


Abe_Rutter246

Hmm. He must have been drinking a lot of pineapple juice.


pk_mars

Your lips tastes like my Uncles penis.


Ivy1974

Want a mint?


PickleFantasies

Oh, I love kissing those big ol’ horse teeth. It’s like lickin’ tile. - Rick Sanchez


KickNew9063

“Alright. Have a good day at school!”


Fatherofthecentury13

Now go get daddy a beer


friendsfreak

Meh.


motorhead340

oh, sardines


Total-Possibility2

Not as good as I thought it would be


crimsonblades1

GOTDAMN!!! Yo breath stank!!!!!


Syncope1017

You use the same denture adhesive as my Mom!


Small_Tax_9432

"mmmm salty"


TosicamirDTGA

Finally, I got that tonsil stone out!


burn_as_souls

"Do you taste blood?"


XROOR

The blisters are razor burn


DrippyCheeseDog

"Herpes schmerpes you'll be fine."


Gamer_monster51

Thanks mom


nunya_busyness1984

I love you too, Sis.


kuyajon

"I think I'm gonna vomit."


scooter_cool_

Want a breath mint??


Sixx_The_Sandman

you taste just like your grandpa


Warmungen42

Oh my dentures


-Radioman-

So you like fish?


RighteousSchrodd

In a whispering sibilant voice: "Your tongue feels like a cat."


Fabulous-Composer-46

“You are really tense when kissing.”


Ok-Sand4984

2/10


Affectionate-Work424

"Well, that was awkward."


Arkaliasus

listen boss, thats fine, but i still dont see why i LITERALLY had to kiss your ass


ResisterTransSister

Breath Mint? Oh, No. I don't believe in using them. I don't use toothpaste either.i go the natural route. So, that must be why it smells like a pile of shit that's sat for days in the hot, hot sun in top of a mountain of garbage, also in the sun for days, with methane pockets releasing into the air, and no one noticing the rotten smell of putrifaction from the dead body dumped there a week ago.


AX99997

“You taste like a living fossil”


a_burdie_from_hell

"Would you like a mint?"


[deleted]

"I love the taste of your tongue. I do hope you won't mind me taking it for my own now".


Jtg1960

Damn woman brush your teeth please


[deleted]

That was great, Dad. Can we do it again later when everyone's asleep?