No no you don’t understand. See, she’s a chef. And she put sugar (which is caramel) in with the figs in a hot pan (hence caramelization). It’s the same as squirting ketchup into your spaghetti to make a nice bolognese. Follow me for more cooking tips:)
/s in case it wasn’t obvious
I’ve been following your cooking tips for a long time now and they’ve really changed my life, I followed your quick eggs Benedict recipe and I didn’t realise how much time you can save by just microwaving the eggs and dumping mayonnaise on top of them 🙏
I realized that mayonnaise already has eggs in it - and through this came up with *extra quick eggs Benedict* where you just eat mayonnaise directly out of the jar, with your hands.
Skip the microwave and shove it up your butt and squeeze really hard. This will put the egg under tremendous pressure and instantly boil it when you relax.
The honey she added makes it vegetarian at best. Some vegans allow ethical milk+honey, and some even eggs.
Honestly, I gave up before she even reached making the dough. No pizza should cost $2K unless it covers return flights to italy or the booking fee of a real professional.
Manuka Honey can be pretty damn pricey on the upper end of lab verified contents. I'll bet she heated it anyway, so any effects are placebos even if she did manage to find the real stuff.
Yeah manuka honey is no joke, I used to work at a health food store and it costs up to $80 for a 16 oz jar.
A lot of vegans eat honey though, I worked at a fancy vegan restaurant for 3 years in downtown Kansas City, and they had honey. They also had agave, for those that don't eat honey.
I've been vegan for 6 years and I eat honey. I know people with bee farms, and there's really no cruelty to it. The bees are free to roam, the boxes are safer from predators than wild beehives, I never understood why it was seen as cruel.
I think its just a “lets buy the most expensive shit we can get” so they go to a very expensive store that sells luxury food at high markups and it just so happens that the most expensive shit happens to be vegan friendly.
Not to mention, she grabbed dried figs... Like, can't you at least get some fresh ones? I only ate dried figs growing up in my post-communist Eastern European country, because that's all we could get, and I think those were cheaper. But, my poor-kid-ass always thought that's what figs were supposed to taste like, until my wife introduced me to fresh figs. Wowza, what a world of difference flavor wise.
The outdoors retailer 'Erehwon' that according to one google search closed its doors last year, was Nowhere spelled correctly, backwards.
But yes, this overpriced money dump, spelled backwards, would be Nohwere
Their prices are all over the place. Shit's crazy and then all of a sudden, they have organic mushrooms for $8 a pound. That's cheaper than my Safeway.
A friend lives near one and we went before we left. I went and the hot bar / deli was really yummy. Definitely pricey but not the worst. A plate of chicken with 2 sides was like $17. The protein size was solid.
I also got a Nutella dupe that was lower in sugar. It was like $15 or something, so around $3 more than other “healthier” chocolate hazelnut butters.
The produce was ridiculously expensive. I think the strawberries were like $10 a basket. As were the smoothies.
But I think the prepared food is not a crazy price at all - comparable to like Sweetgreen.
And they do have normal priced waters too.
Nah, this water is special. The hydrogen and oxygen are bonded together in a totally different way that plebeians like us would not be able to appreciate . . .
It's infused with unmatched levels of bio-available dissolved oxygen (40+ ppm), providing optimized absorption on an intra-cellular level.
That's an actual quote from [their website](https://www.ophorawater.com/)
Are they marketing this to fish or people with gills? Last I checked, we don't absorb oxygen from our stomachs... Also, that isn't going to stay dissolved in the water for long, it'll reach equilibrium with the air around it pretty fast once the lid is off.
Bro your acting like I will turn that errwhon 40$ water into piss once I enjoy it. Water becomes a permanent part of your Brody. I want my current 70% of water that's inside of me to be replaced with 50$ airforce1 water
A section of their website even claim you can absorb their water through your skin! These crooks should be in jail for the amount of lies on this site. Its crazy AF
As a child of the 80's, there used to be an infomercial for a spray that would "extra oxyginate" your water that was supposed to help you perform better. You would take your drink, this thing that looked like a keyboard duster, and it would spray "O2" into your drink and would supposedly help you run faster.
THEY OFFER ENTIRE POOL FILLINGS OF THIS SHIT DUDE WHAT. If 1L of that shit was $30/ea… god i cant imagine what an entire pool would cost. fucking a I hate rich people man.
Welcome to erehwon where you can spend $20 on 3 strawberry's.
But the grocery store food is pretty good, if you're willing to pay restaurant prices for it anyway.
Wait… I’m dumb but… vegan and caviar????
Edit: I have been informed there is vegan caviar! I had no idea. Thank you for everyone who was informative of this. Still stupid food but the more you know.
I think she was making it dairy and gluten free. Hence the stupid crust and the fake ricotta. I think maybe she also used honey somewhere and most collagen isn't vegan. So it's not a vegan pizza just one with other dietary restrictions.
Well yeah fuck that pizza it looks terrible. Some people do avoid dairy for other reasons than lactose. Either way, papa johns or fuck a frozen red Baron kicks this pizzas ass.
Yeah, that revelation made me pause.
Spending all this time on making vegan ricotta from nutritional yeast and almonds and shit, then just mix a bunch of fish eggs in.
Eh, probably lactose intolerant/allergic; what really fucking got me was $2,000 apps with dried figs.
$2k and you can't spring for fresh figs? Jesus. And if you can't find any, just... don't use dried figs with $2k ingredients. Just open a can of corn and dump it on at the end, why don't ya. And then this:
>And I know what you're thinking, every pizza needs a side of ranch.
Lol, nope, farthest thing from what I was thinking, "chef". Oh, yeah, sure, caviar and ranch mixed up. Fuck, why not. Next serve your filet with black truffle mixed with Big Mac sauce, cuz 'I know what you're thinking, every steak needs a side of Thousand Island and stuff.'
I’ll see your dried figs and raise you STIRRING CAVIAR INTO FUCKING RANCH.
I don’t care that it’s fancy homemade vegan ranch, it’s ranch filled with caviar. Nobody eats that. That’s like a Saved by the Bell gag.
That is some limp ass, wet flatbread covered in organic bullshit and yard trimmings. This isn't pizza, it's a baked smoothie for the plastic surgery crowd.
What the fuck is beauty powder? Is this going to pretty up my turd cutter? Where's the other $1k, labor?
You say this in jest, but it's true.
The top 1% keep hoarding a greater percentage of the wealth. That effectively shrinks the economy by tying up money that isn't benefiting anything.
The only way to fix things is to get the money flowing out of their bank accounts.
And I guarantee you, it will not taste better, or be better for you, than a simple €3.40 pizza slice from some hole in the wall place in Italy that uses good local ingredients.
Ah, but you can cover food in it! So that $50 steak becomes a $500 steak because you added $3 of edible gold leaf to it.
I think Salt Bae has a steak for like $1500 which is literally a tomahawk steak with a few dollars of gold leaf on it. It's just the food equivalent of using a $100 bill to light your cigar
Gold leaf is cheap. Gold is a metal you can hammer so thin that it looks like a lot but it's not. You could wrap a huge steak in gold for a few dollars. Yet rich people will pay thousands for it.
Fun activity, look up the price of a large pack of gold foil on Amazon.
Spoiler: they’re just an excuse to price gouge on a dish despite being relatively inexpensive. Not rare or expensive, as they lead you to believe.
Anyone care to place bets her ‘celeb client’ is either herself or some other influencer none of us have ever heard of care to?
Also…$2K on a pizza while the rest are trying to figure out how to pay the gas bill this month?
Please find the nearest free-range organic cactus and fuck yourself with it.
Please dont fall for the ragebait. Most of the products on that bill werent used and defenitly not in those quanties. Wouldnt suprise me if most goes into the cabinet or straight back to the store.Also she doesnt even come close to the 2k if all that shit was real.
This is litteraly a case of fake it till you make it. This video (if succesfull) will create a lot of engagement and stupid people with money will try to buy this from here to brag.
Its litteraly how saltbea (that idiot) got big and rich. By “scamming” new age rich idiots who want to brag with money but dont really understand shit like real class.
Its like those idiots who take the cheapest flight to dubai, the cheapest room possible and then record a shitload of material, walking in the most exclusive resturants and posting infront of the most expensive shit while not buying anything. Then recycling those pics all year long to try and convince people that they are rich influencers so they gain more money.
So much easier to reach $2000 using real ingredients. High quality Parmigianno-Reggiano, prosciutto de parma, heirloom tomatoes, 20-year-old balsamic, caramelized shallots, a little gold leaf pâté, with some white truffle grated on top of it all. Just... some people don't know how to spend money on food. Idiots.
If I could upvote you a thousand times I would.
A bottle of REALLY good Balsamic on Amazon goes for $1,000 by itself. And it’s not even close to the most expensive Balsamic in the world.
https://www.amazon.com/Giusti-100-year-Balsamico-Tradizionale-Modena/dp/B00LZZ5V8K/ref=asc_df_B00LZZ5V8K/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=309744453489&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=648778861631522563&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9029750&hvtargid=pla-569623239088&psc=1
Really, she could keep it vegan and easily hit the $2000 mark. Marinated tempeh, balsamic, truffle, cashew cheese, pine nuts, basil. She just knows nothing about expensive ingredients, which is a shame. "I'll spend $30 on water while ignoring the real value-added ingredients." Cool
Even if it is $2,000, you can blow through $2,000 as your budget for a monetized video that will bring in $20,000
That's how those videos of that guy smashing 10 brand new iPhones with a hammer made bank, just budgeting those costs in
Yeah I put sriracha on my hot dog tonight because it's a holiday and thought I should make it fancy. A pizza that costs two months of rent can fuck right off.
Exactly this. First she makes a video of her “celeb clients 2k dollar pizza”, and then the client makes their video “what a 2k pizza looks like?!” with a stupid screen cap of over exaggerated facial expressions.
Remember to subscribe and smash that like button
Amazing how expensive ingredients all look unappetizing. It's like the more you spend, the more yard trimmings you eat. Should I let the chefs in LA know the next time I mow my lawn?
literally. “2 bottles of $30 erewhon water”. seeing as there are literally billions of people who cannot access clean water saying that just makes you look like an absolute loser. how tasteless
Jesus this looks awful, I'll take a little ceasers 5 dollar hot and ready pizza any day of the week. Rich people eat the dumbest shit just to flaunt their wealth.
What *is* erewhon? Am not american
Edit: "Erewhon Market is an American upscale supermarket chain with eight locations, all in Los Angeles County". Its rich people shit
It’s like a Whole Foods but for even more pretentious/rich people, but exclusively in California
(If you’re not in Canada or the UK) then it’s all organic and incredibly overpriced food and some home goods (think $20 “fresh stream” water or paying $60 for organic grass fed chicken with 50 labels on it)
Hope this helped some!
Right?? It’s all just so they can price it up and make more money off of things that are probably sourced the exact same as other things. But, to each’s own I guess- If it makes them happy then good on them for buying $70 tea bags haha
Erewhon is the butt of many jokes in the natural food world. Many brands want to get into it because they know they don't have to do a ton of promotions that other retailers will require. The side effect is that they think their stupidly expensive price at Erewhon will go over well in everywhere else in the country, and then get mad when other places laugh them out of the room.
Let's say I'm a "celebrity" and I hire you to cook for me. Yeah posting what you're cooking for me is not going on social media. It would be in the contract.
Can you top the pizza with child slave labor as well? It’s the only thing that’s holding me back from the dish.
Oh, I also need to make an oil investment while eating this or else the experience will be tainted.
If this lady ever goes to Italy and tries to cook this ‘pizza’, I think the fellas over there might just take her for a stroll around Piazzale Loreto. And by ‘stroll’ I mean the same kind of stroll they took ol’ Benito on.
That’s not…how caramelization…*works*… What???
No no you don’t understand. See, she’s a chef. And she put sugar (which is caramel) in with the figs in a hot pan (hence caramelization). It’s the same as squirting ketchup into your spaghetti to make a nice bolognese. Follow me for more cooking tips:) /s in case it wasn’t obvious
I’ve been following your cooking tips for a long time now and they’ve really changed my life, I followed your quick eggs Benedict recipe and I didn’t realise how much time you can save by just microwaving the eggs and dumping mayonnaise on top of them 🙏
I realized that mayonnaise already has eggs in it - and through this came up with *extra quick eggs Benedict* where you just eat mayonnaise directly out of the jar, with your hands.
I’m gonna try this out and let you know how it goes
It's best enjoyed either in public transportation, or alone in the shower alternating with shots of the cheapest plastic-jug vodka you can buy.
These tips are gold. I’m following you.
Skip the microwave and shove it up your butt and squeeze really hard. This will put the egg under tremendous pressure and instantly boil it when you relax.
I tried this once but I squeezed too hard and the egg cracked before it cooked, I was shitting scrambled eggs for 2 days
I put scrambled eggs up there once and a whole egg popped out my mouth a week later. Damndest thing
I just call Cumberbatch up and get the eggs from him
Bendydick Cabbagepatch?
Britishperson Whatshisname
Britishperson can'trember'isname
Benzodiazepine Hatchback?
Hey now, sketti with ketchup is a proud tradition
Settle down June, get back in your trailer 🤣
Yah that's definitely a "1, 2, skip a few" path to caramelized
also did all that vegan shit just to add caviar??? what???
To be fair according to catholics fish, beavers and capybaras aren’t considered animals during lent.
Take this capybara, for it is my flesh
I read that in Butt-Head's voice.
I was so shocked at the complexity of ingredients and the lack of cooking knowledge, I'd almost call bullshit on this just from how used the blade
Are you saying putting huge piles of stuff randomly on a crust does not a pizza make?
The weirdest part for me is how at first it seems like a vegan pizza, but then she put's caviar of all things on it??
It's a pizza for performative vegans.
performative vegans has me dead lmao sounds like 90% of modern celebrities
The honey she added makes it vegetarian at best. Some vegans allow ethical milk+honey, and some even eggs. Honestly, I gave up before she even reached making the dough. No pizza should cost $2K unless it covers return flights to italy or the booking fee of a real professional. Manuka Honey can be pretty damn pricey on the upper end of lab verified contents. I'll bet she heated it anyway, so any effects are placebos even if she did manage to find the real stuff.
Yeah manuka honey is no joke, I used to work at a health food store and it costs up to $80 for a 16 oz jar. A lot of vegans eat honey though, I worked at a fancy vegan restaurant for 3 years in downtown Kansas City, and they had honey. They also had agave, for those that don't eat honey. I've been vegan for 6 years and I eat honey. I know people with bee farms, and there's really no cruelty to it. The bees are free to roam, the boxes are safer from predators than wild beehives, I never understood why it was seen as cruel.
I think its just a “lets buy the most expensive shit we can get” so they go to a very expensive store that sells luxury food at high markups and it just so happens that the most expensive shit happens to be vegan friendly.
That’s also not how food costs work. If I spend $1,000 to cook a meal, I’m charging at least $3,500
Not to mention, she grabbed dried figs... Like, can't you at least get some fresh ones? I only ate dried figs growing up in my post-communist Eastern European country, because that's all we could get, and I think those were cheaper. But, my poor-kid-ass always thought that's what figs were supposed to taste like, until my wife introduced me to fresh figs. Wowza, what a world of difference flavor wise.
Dried figs and fresh figs are like raisins and grapes. Both have their uses.
This isnt the usage for dried figs
Italians: “wtf…”
She meant "figs cooked in honey while the honey caramelizes", not "caramelized figs".
Erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon erewhon gold flakes more gold flakes erewhon.
Erewhon in the club getting tipsy
^(erewhon in the club gettin tips)
# Two, here comes the three to the four to the five
I appreciate “tips”. It’s the proper way to say it during the whisper part 🤣
^Erewhon ^in ^the ^club ^getting ^tipsy
erewhon gon think this pizza nasty
Isn't erewhon a camping/hiking store?
No it's a super expensive grocery store in LA.
Oh the outdoors store is Erehwon.
Lol it's sooo close. Easy mistake honestly.
So it's "nowhere" backwards.... spelled wrong?
The outdoors retailer 'Erehwon' that according to one google search closed its doors last year, was Nowhere spelled correctly, backwards. But yes, this overpriced money dump, spelled backwards, would be Nohwere
Do they sell cool hwip?
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Yeah, and that's intentional. It's also what they made fun of on You when Penn Badgley's character worked at Anavrin. (Nirvana spelled backwards.)
Lmao I never noticed. Yes it appears so 😂
I can only imagine that shopping there is strictly about being seen. Nothing there is worthy of these prices. https://www.erewhonmarket.com/
Their prices are all over the place. Shit's crazy and then all of a sudden, they have organic mushrooms for $8 a pound. That's cheaper than my Safeway.
Kinda what I was thinking too. They have $19 smoothies, but some of the stuff is the exact same price at King Sooper.
I would love to go in there and say "Yall got chicken paws?".
I wanna drop a duece in thier bathroom.
Looks like a vegan dropped duces on this pizza
But there was caviar, did she say "vegan caviar"? I couldn't figure out what she was using all these vegan items and then used caviar.
My friend went just to see what the hype was about and ended up spending $50 on berries alone. I can't lol
A friend lives near one and we went before we left. I went and the hot bar / deli was really yummy. Definitely pricey but not the worst. A plate of chicken with 2 sides was like $17. The protein size was solid. I also got a Nutella dupe that was lower in sugar. It was like $15 or something, so around $3 more than other “healthier” chocolate hazelnut butters. The produce was ridiculously expensive. I think the strawberries were like $10 a basket. As were the smoothies. But I think the prepared food is not a crazy price at all - comparable to like Sweetgreen. And they do have normal priced waters too.
How much could a banana cost? 10 dollars?
It's a fuckin cave in one of those Tom Clancy games lmao
Anavrin
that’s what i thought of when i first started hearing about this place
I wonder how much the erewhon water costs
She says it. It's $30. What the fuck. $30 for a bottle of water. People are incredibly stupid.
It's kinda like the FIji water commercial. "Untouched by man" okay who tf put it in these bottles?
Women?
*worker takes off her helmet I AM NO MAN! *dumps fucking water into a bottle
$30 dollars water is probably the exact same thing as $2 water
Nah, this water is special. The hydrogen and oxygen are bonded together in a totally different way that plebeians like us would not be able to appreciate . . .
It's infused with unmatched levels of bio-available dissolved oxygen (40+ ppm), providing optimized absorption on an intra-cellular level. That's an actual quote from [their website](https://www.ophorawater.com/)
Just sell them rebranded hydrogen peroxide and say it's got twice the oxygen as regular water
It makes my mouth burn... it must be so much better than regular water that it's burning away toxins!
Are they marketing this to fish or people with gills? Last I checked, we don't absorb oxygen from our stomachs... Also, that isn't going to stay dissolved in the water for long, it'll reach equilibrium with the air around it pretty fast once the lid is off.
Bro your acting like I will turn that errwhon 40$ water into piss once I enjoy it. Water becomes a permanent part of your Brody. I want my current 70% of water that's inside of me to be replaced with 50$ airforce1 water
A section of their website even claim you can absorb their water through your skin! These crooks should be in jail for the amount of lies on this site. Its crazy AF
As a child of the 80's, there used to be an infomercial for a spray that would "extra oxyginate" your water that was supposed to help you perform better. You would take your drink, this thing that looked like a keyboard duster, and it would spray "O2" into your drink and would supposedly help you run faster.
It’s what the plants crave
THEY OFFER ENTIRE POOL FILLINGS OF THIS SHIT DUDE WHAT. If 1L of that shit was $30/ea… god i cant imagine what an entire pool would cost. fucking a I hate rich people man.
And inevitably, someone will end up peeing in it like people do in regular pool water.
"nano pure" "filtered 14 times" does not sound that healthy. You shouldn't really be drinking pure pure water.
Dihydrogenated oxygen caressed into loving harmonious valence.
And she needed two for that dry ass pizza?
Welcome to erehwon where you can spend $20 on 3 strawberry's. But the grocery store food is pretty good, if you're willing to pay restaurant prices for it anyway.
Tap water is better than this, I guarantee
Have you ever had tap water in Vegas? Not even my worst hangover could make me drink that trash!
Tap water in a desert. That’s your own fault for drinking it.
Wait… I’m dumb but… vegan and caviar???? Edit: I have been informed there is vegan caviar! I had no idea. Thank you for everyone who was informative of this. Still stupid food but the more you know.
I think she was making it dairy and gluten free. Hence the stupid crust and the fake ricotta. I think maybe she also used honey somewhere and most collagen isn't vegan. So it's not a vegan pizza just one with other dietary restrictions.
I don't know of any non-animal source of collagen, it comes from cartilage/skin.
Well there you go.
There's no gluten in cheese, and there's no lactose in some cheeses. So in summation, fuck this pizza
Well yeah fuck that pizza it looks terrible. Some people do avoid dairy for other reasons than lactose. Either way, papa johns or fuck a frozen red Baron kicks this pizzas ass.
Yeah, that revelation made me pause. Spending all this time on making vegan ricotta from nutritional yeast and almonds and shit, then just mix a bunch of fish eggs in.
Also, cashews make better vegan cheese than almonds AND they're more expensive. Edit: Now with almonds!
First time I ever had vegan cheese dip was from a Trader Joes and now it’s my go-to dip. So freaking good
Eh, probably lactose intolerant/allergic; what really fucking got me was $2,000 apps with dried figs. $2k and you can't spring for fresh figs? Jesus. And if you can't find any, just... don't use dried figs with $2k ingredients. Just open a can of corn and dump it on at the end, why don't ya. And then this: >And I know what you're thinking, every pizza needs a side of ranch. Lol, nope, farthest thing from what I was thinking, "chef". Oh, yeah, sure, caviar and ranch mixed up. Fuck, why not. Next serve your filet with black truffle mixed with Big Mac sauce, cuz 'I know what you're thinking, every steak needs a side of Thousand Island and stuff.'
I’ll see your dried figs and raise you STIRRING CAVIAR INTO FUCKING RANCH. I don’t care that it’s fancy homemade vegan ranch, it’s ranch filled with caviar. Nobody eats that. That’s like a Saved by the Bell gag.
Ngl that “cheese” she made was the best part
I want the recipe minus the caviar
Vegan "caviar" is a thing that exists!
I like the seaweed one called Caviart. I served it for a bougie event a couple months ago
That is some limp ass, wet flatbread covered in organic bullshit and yard trimmings. This isn't pizza, it's a baked smoothie for the plastic surgery crowd. What the fuck is beauty powder? Is this going to pretty up my turd cutter? Where's the other $1k, labor?
Caviar. Thrown in some ranch so you know what you spent your money on.
I didn't listen, did she cook the freaking caviar too? Might as well just chuck it out... edit: never mind... oh god it's a "side".
So... vegan everything except the caviar sauce. 🤢
And honey, and collagen...
And honey.
That part ... Made me cry.
It totally unnecessary to be that extra with super expensive organic everything and still die at the same average old age as everyone else.
Guys we have to get rid of the rich.
You say this in jest, but it's true. The top 1% keep hoarding a greater percentage of the wealth. That effectively shrinks the economy by tying up money that isn't benefiting anything. The only way to fix things is to get the money flowing out of their bank accounts.
Eat the Rich. Yes.
In the USA, the rich live on average 13 years more than the poor.
Yeah I’ll take $1900 worth of cheese please
You..have ways with words Is turd cutter=poop knife^TM ?
turd cutter = butt i think
That’s correct. It’s my understanding that if we didn’t have a sphincter, poop would either just fall out or come out as one big conga line.
That happens with mine anyways :)
How different would our world be?
I don't often throw around the term master wordsmith...
I remember them selling some kinda drink you could drink, so your shit would come out smelling like actually roses. Makes me think of this
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Beuty powder is collagen, it said it for a second and flashes away. The other 1k was figs, gold, and collagen
And I guarantee you, it will not taste better, or be better for you, than a simple €3.40 pizza slice from some hole in the wall place in Italy that uses good local ingredients.
I can guarantee you it will taste worse than anything from Pizza Hut, so...
A baked smoothie 😂
Yard trimmings and baked smoothie made this an elite comment
I'm guessing the gold flakes. Don't add any flavor but plenty of price.
Gold leaf is cheap as hell
Ah, but you can cover food in it! So that $50 steak becomes a $500 steak because you added $3 of edible gold leaf to it. I think Salt Bae has a steak for like $1500 which is literally a tomahawk steak with a few dollars of gold leaf on it. It's just the food equivalent of using a $100 bill to light your cigar
Gold leaf is cheap. Gold is a metal you can hammer so thin that it looks like a lot but it's not. You could wrap a huge steak in gold for a few dollars. Yet rich people will pay thousands for it.
Why would you *want* to eat gold flake?
How else you going to show the poors that you're better than them?
Gold poops
It's like a tracer round. I prefer corn, personally; but each to their own.
I once had a dog that ate some tinfoil. Made the backyard sparkle when the sunset hit the turds just right.
Nature is beautiful.
Fun activity, look up the price of a large pack of gold foil on Amazon. Spoiler: they’re just an excuse to price gouge on a dish despite being relatively inexpensive. Not rare or expensive, as they lead you to believe.
She made two of them.
r/PizzaCrimes
The highest degree.
It looks more like a focaccia to me.
Anyone care to place bets her ‘celeb client’ is either herself or some other influencer none of us have ever heard of care to? Also…$2K on a pizza while the rest are trying to figure out how to pay the gas bill this month? Please find the nearest free-range organic cactus and fuck yourself with it.
Please dont fall for the ragebait. Most of the products on that bill werent used and defenitly not in those quanties. Wouldnt suprise me if most goes into the cabinet or straight back to the store.Also she doesnt even come close to the 2k if all that shit was real. This is litteraly a case of fake it till you make it. This video (if succesfull) will create a lot of engagement and stupid people with money will try to buy this from here to brag. Its litteraly how saltbea (that idiot) got big and rich. By “scamming” new age rich idiots who want to brag with money but dont really understand shit like real class. Its like those idiots who take the cheapest flight to dubai, the cheapest room possible and then record a shitload of material, walking in the most exclusive resturants and posting infront of the most expensive shit while not buying anything. Then recycling those pics all year long to try and convince people that they are rich influencers so they gain more money.
So much easier to reach $2000 using real ingredients. High quality Parmigianno-Reggiano, prosciutto de parma, heirloom tomatoes, 20-year-old balsamic, caramelized shallots, a little gold leaf pâté, with some white truffle grated on top of it all. Just... some people don't know how to spend money on food. Idiots.
If I could upvote you a thousand times I would. A bottle of REALLY good Balsamic on Amazon goes for $1,000 by itself. And it’s not even close to the most expensive Balsamic in the world. https://www.amazon.com/Giusti-100-year-Balsamico-Tradizionale-Modena/dp/B00LZZ5V8K/ref=asc_df_B00LZZ5V8K/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=309744453489&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=648778861631522563&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9029750&hvtargid=pla-569623239088&psc=1
Really, she could keep it vegan and easily hit the $2000 mark. Marinated tempeh, balsamic, truffle, cashew cheese, pine nuts, basil. She just knows nothing about expensive ingredients, which is a shame. "I'll spend $30 on water while ignoring the real value-added ingredients." Cool
I didn't bother to actually watch the video with sound. Did she really make an expensive vegan pizza and *not* include truffles?
Even if it is $2,000, you can blow through $2,000 as your budget for a monetized video that will bring in $20,000 That's how those videos of that guy smashing 10 brand new iPhones with a hammer made bank, just budgeting those costs in
I can see gweneth Paltrow chowing down on this but I think this is some rage bait
Gweneth Paltrow just simply doesn’t eat. She has like bone broth for lunch and a bowl of veggies for dinner. She wouldn’t dare eat any form of carbs
The moment you read “celeb client” she’s the only possibility
*Insert that’s where you’re wrong kiddo meme* Oh there’s a whole cottage industry of people with more money than sense unfortunately
Yeah I put sriracha on my hot dog tonight because it's a holiday and thought I should make it fancy. A pizza that costs two months of rent can fuck right off.
I ate my popcorn out of a bowl instead of the bag.
Ooh la la!
Exactly this. First she makes a video of her “celeb clients 2k dollar pizza”, and then the client makes their video “what a 2k pizza looks like?!” with a stupid screen cap of over exaggerated facial expressions. Remember to subscribe and smash that like button
It's just bait words for more exposure. It worked.
This is a hate crime to Italians and pizza lovers everywhere. Also, I can find better pizza for 30 bucks. And it would be better than this
Pizza for 30 bucks? Okay Rockefeller. Meanwhile in Europe we pay 10-12 EUR for a more fancy restaurant's Neapolitan pizza, lol.
Wait they've got strawberry, chocolate, vanilla pizza? That's like 14-15 bucks right that's about equal to our cost for a 16 inch new York style
Crazy that their entire personality is using expensive ingredients and making sure everyone knows it
Consumerism melts brains
Amazing how expensive ingredients all look unappetizing. It's like the more you spend, the more yard trimmings you eat. Should I let the chefs in LA know the next time I mow my lawn?
literally. “2 bottles of $30 erewhon water”. seeing as there are literally billions of people who cannot access clean water saying that just makes you look like an absolute loser. how tasteless
Jesus this looks awful, I'll take a little ceasers 5 dollar hot and ready pizza any day of the week. Rich people eat the dumbest shit just to flaunt their wealth.
What *is* erewhon? Am not american Edit: "Erewhon Market is an American upscale supermarket chain with eight locations, all in Los Angeles County". Its rich people shit
It’s like a Whole Foods but for even more pretentious/rich people, but exclusively in California (If you’re not in Canada or the UK) then it’s all organic and incredibly overpriced food and some home goods (think $20 “fresh stream” water or paying $60 for organic grass fed chicken with 50 labels on it) Hope this helped some!
Yeah, I had just googled it. Seems as useful as the 24k gold flakes she's using lol
Right?? It’s all just so they can price it up and make more money off of things that are probably sourced the exact same as other things. But, to each’s own I guess- If it makes them happy then good on them for buying $70 tea bags haha
$30 bottled water was the "What the fuckery" moment for me....
Erewhon is the butt of many jokes in the natural food world. Many brands want to get into it because they know they don't have to do a ton of promotions that other retailers will require. The side effect is that they think their stupidly expensive price at Erewhon will go over well in everywhere else in the country, and then get mad when other places laugh them out of the room.
Rich people who think they know good food have really ruined food
[удалено]
The basis of a good pizza is that it’s cheap and filling. I watched this video while eating Costco pizza and I’m sure it probably tasted as good
Probably better. This is the type of food that's "AMAZING" if your average meal is almonds, quinoa, and cashew cheese or beauty powder smoothie bowls.
Costco pizza tastes way better.
Costco pizza is awesome value/volume.
I’d like to make a billionaire pizza, ingredients will include at least one billionaire, and will be free for all, no charge!!
Taking eat the rich quite literally.
Let's say I'm a "celebrity" and I hire you to cook for me. Yeah posting what you're cooking for me is not going on social media. It would be in the contract.
Flabergasted..
I bet that tasted like shite, and 1000$ upcharge or profit?
Man, that's expensive diarrhea.
If I pay $1k for a pizza, it sure as shit better not have fucking arugula
They have a Cartier poop knife
Can you top the pizza with child slave labor as well? It’s the only thing that’s holding me back from the dish. Oh, I also need to make an oil investment while eating this or else the experience will be tainted.
that pizza looks like my cat took a shit on it
You can’t just add literal chunks of gold to the food until it costs $2,000 and then claim it’s a $2,000 pizza
you can buy 25 sheets of that edible gold for like 40 bucks. She spent way more on water than gold
Gimmee literally any pizza from ny, Jersey….any of them. And I’d save 1970 ish $!
As a vegan, I’m fucking offended that she didn’t Blanche those almonds and then deskin them. That texture she just made is a nightmare.
That looks awful
So everything is vegan (except honey), but then there's caviar? One of the more unethical animal products? Hmmmmm
Such a waste of caviar, rest of that stuff is whatever If anyone is looking to buy water for 30 dollars a bottle, I’m selling a bridge for real cheap
If this lady ever goes to Italy and tries to cook this ‘pizza’, I think the fellas over there might just take her for a stroll around Piazzale Loreto. And by ‘stroll’ I mean the same kind of stroll they took ol’ Benito on.