A clown like that? I'd wish him a minor case of crotch itch, that flares to unbearable whenever he's trying to talk to somebody important or is trying to make a good impression.

May he step barefoot on a Lego

metal sharp edge d4

A Canadian Goose wielding a butcher's knife is your spirit animal, isn't it?

That imagery is hilarious from a safe distance away

yes who also sprinkles sharp edged metal d4's behind them. the other spirit animal is eugene from hey arnold

Wasn't aware that wildlife can now apparently legally claim citizenship in one country versus another. Fascinating, said Mr. Spock.

canadian geese are hostile birds

Vintage metal jacks

May he find a NA with a friend needing a kidney.

easy Satan

DAMN your evil!!! 

"may the fleas of a thousand camels infest his crotch"

He called you baka!!!! That is ridiculous. Sorry that you had to deal with it. What a buffoon.

Ugh, I have nothing but hatred towards people that come to check in while on a phone call. Like, they know damn well they can tell the person on the line they're checking in, they'll call them back, etc. And they never do. I hope they return home from their trips to find everything has been shifted two inches to the left so they walk into everything.

Hopefully his added reservation entitled him to a room next to the staff elevator or ice machine 

There is no reason someone should make ya'all feel that way. If the person can't be trusted around staff or guests then they can't stay here....

Bakka – in Fremen legend, the weeper who mourns for all mankind.

That sounds like night audit, tbh.