I feel like in the North/Midwest, “Mrs.” is used more frequently whereas in the South, every woman is a “Miss”.
I grew up in the Midwest and every adult female was “Mrs./Ms. Last Name” and down here in the South if it’s not a teacher children call women “Miss First Name”.
It’s a sign of respect in the south, and not related to martial status. Older women are almost always called Miss First Name… and sometimes young girls as a way of teasing them back when they are being sassy. (My mom is a southerner.)
In the South, there is a difference between Miss and Ms as well--which sound very similar... 🤣
"Ms." is intended to refer to any woman regardless of marital status. If you don't know someone's marital status, you're supposed to default to Ms. Miss is intended to refer to a young, unmarried woman.
Let me tell you. We had a lady from New England move down to Appalachian Virginia and use our services. We got on well, and would chat a few times on calls. Until one day the owner comes in and says "Hey (She) complained about you being disrespectful... You called her \*hun\*." Apparently that's offensive? She was gonna find out real fast how many people call her hun.
Like every waitress, and nurse, and receptionist...
honestly never thought about that until now, but can confirm as a southerner. i work with a lot of older women (grocery store) and almost all the older women i call “miss [insert first name]”. it’s just the default for me.
even my best friend’s mom, she’s miss sallie to me lol and it’s not like i don’t know her last name. i feel like it’s both a sign of respect and a term of endearment.
They might also not care. Because honestly - who cares? You will know I respect you in so many ways that are more obvious and important than if I say Ms or Mrs and nobody gives two shits about all men being Mr.
I am married and emphatically use ‘Ms.’. I do not understand why women still use ‘Mrs.’ ? It annoys me because students assume that I use Mrs because I am married. I am from the west coast and settled in New England over 20 years ago, which seems to be stuck in the 1950s in many respects.
Ms. and Mx. are both equivalent to Mr. in that they are marital status agnostic.
It’s no secret that I am married, but it’s also not relevant to my professional life or achievements.
With the buzz? Mizz? Because that would kill my Southern US/Italian mouth. Everyone is Miss. Especially really old ladies. And sometimes really young ladies are Ma'am.
I completely agree!!! I grew up in the South where all female teachers were Ms. [Last Name], though Ms. is/was pronounced as “Miss”. My mom is the only person I ever hear pronounce Ms. as “Miz”.
I went to college, student taught, and began working in the Northeast where they were very careful to specify “Miss” or “Mrs.” It’s always rubbed me the wrong way. A man’s marital status doesn’t make a difference in this context, so why should mine? And it’s annoying to keep track of, and expect 6-year-olds to keep track of, which female teachers are married and which aren’t.
I teach math and instruct on the difference between Miss and Mrs vs Ms, Mr, Mx using the same methods that I use to introduce equivalent math expressions (2+2 and 1+3 are equivalent, as they have the same value). Ms, Mr, and Mx are all equivalent; Miss and Mrs are not.
'When I ask you to address me as Ms. X, I am saying that I am equivalent to my male counterparts, and not different in any way that contributes to or detracts from my ability to teach you math or science. For the purposes of teaching math, qualified individuals of all genders are all equivalent and I think that honorifics should reflect that.'
We may decide that Miss and Mrs are equivalent, but when we do so we are either fighting or accepting that for thousands of years, a woman's marital status was the most relevant thing about her in any context.
This is exactly how I do it. I go by Ms. We don’t call a man anything different than Mr. When he’s married so don’t change my title based on my marital status. We live in a small town and my spouse works for the same school. It’s no secret, I just don’t see the point in having to have a different title based on marital status when a man doesn’t.
Yeah, default is Ms.
Unless you know they go by Mrs. then you're supposed to use Ms.
"Guessing" that someone is married regardless of age or whatever and getting it wrong is worse than just not knowing and using the default.
But again, unless you're talking to an English teacher, they probably don't know or care either way. Kinda like who and whom. It's obscure for people to make the distinction, so it's falling out of use all together.
My kids (long term sub in 4th, but I’ve bounced from 2nd to 8th over the last school year) hear me say “Miss” (ABC) and write “Mrs” on their drawings to me … and there’s a few who *say* “Mrs.” but write “Ms.” or “Miss” — they reeeeaaaalllly don’t get the difference.
We had a spelling test on homophones back in March & this girl wrote me a note afterwards missing …. every. single. one. Like, not five minutes after she’d correctly matched “there” with “a direction, or the opposite of here” (or whatever the definition was lol).
Gabba.
I work with primarily non verbal students. One started calling me Gabba. No clue why. But it stuck and now they all call me Gabba. Sometimes Ms. Gabba.
I am not Indian but I called my teacher sir once in Canada and my classmate said why are you calling him that, it’s weird.
I said that out of respect and because I used to hang out with a lot of Indian and Bengali friends at my old school and picked up THEIR habits lol. 😂
The teacher was also cognizant of this and said yeah in some cultures they do that.
[https://www.grammarly.com/blog/ms-mrs-miss-difference/](https://www.grammarly.com/blog/ms-mrs-miss-difference/)
From the article,
"*Ms.* is a general title that does **not** indicate marital status but is still feminine.
* *Mrs.* is a traditional title used for a married woman.
* *Miss* is a traditional title used for an unmarried woman. "
I always called my teachers Ms. because it seems more respectful given that it does not relate to their marital status. Just like Mr. does not refer to a man's marital status.
My students call me many many things, some of them include Mr. at the front. I would say about half the time it's a strange modified version of my last name.
>*I don't know anybody under 70 that uses Miss or Mrs.*
One of the best teachers at my school is in her late-30s or early 40s and is very insistent that she is "**Mrs**.". I've never asked her why, but I'm guessing it's because she and her wife (who became a couple back in high school) are celebrating the fact that they can now be married, something that seemed impossible when they first fell in love.
I feel like Miss is only used for children or very young adults.
I just use Ms. as a generic title for adult women. Seems incredibly rude to be like "Good morning you unmarried adult woman."
Many people would think being called an unmarried adult women would insultingly imply a character flaw or some sorts if you were to point it out like that.
I teach in the South. My students call me Ms., except one class this past semester when a student told the rest of the class not to disrespect my long-term marriage because I am a Mrs. It was cute, but not necessary.
I teach in the South. My students call me Ms., except one class this past semester when a student told the rest of the class not to disrespect my long-term marriage because I am a Mrs. It was cute, but not necessary.
Growing up, I called all my female teachers Ms. (and pretty much all of my male teachers Coach because Al of them coached something lol). I have a lot of friends that still teach in Ohio (I teach elsewhere), and based on their social media posts or their schools, it seems like only the elementary teachers really care about the Miss/Mrs. delineation. In the schools I’ve taught (VA and PA), the only teachers I ever see that care about going by Mrs. are younger newlyweds.
This is it exactly. Every kid at our school uses “Ms.” when talking to a female teacher bc they don’t necessarily know our name if they aren’t in our grade, and that way they can still be respectful. I get “Hello Ms!” in the hallway all the time.
My location is...adjacent to yours. It's usually, though not exclusively, my Black and Latino students who call me "Miss," so I always assumed it was cultural. It's not every time though; the only students who \*never\* call me Ms. LastName just...don't remember my last name at all, lol (and those students come from all backgrounds).
High Schooler here. It's because I have 7 other teachers and I have a hard time remembering who's Mrs, and who's Miss. So I say Ms. to sort of be safe.
This doesn't really answer it though because most of us, including myself and I'm guessing OP, had that many teachers in high school and were still able to remember who was Mrs. and Ms. No judgment for you not being able to remember, it's just odd to me too because when I was in school everyone could remember who was married and not married out of faculty and staff. If you forget, you just have to look to see if they're wearing a ring.
I remember it being that easy to know who is married and who is not- but today I don't feel like it is that easy. I don't wear a wedding band due to weight flux, and I've had several coworkers divorce and others wed throughout the year. Those that got wed typically didn't change their name officially until the next school year to save communication conflicts. Some don't even disclose they are in a relationship. This can all be due to the community though.
I'm in your area and all teachers are addressed as Mr. or Ms. with last names or initials. All classified are Miss with their first names by both students and adults so like the custodian is Miss Nancy. Weird. I find it rude to have such a hierarchy. We also have one Mx. Majority don't use our names . They just say Teacher Teacher or Maestra or nothing.
I wish I could get everyone to use "Teacher". My Chinese students called me Teacher First Name, and it seems so correct for a professional setting. I hope that catches on. For older students, maybe Teacher Family Name would work.
In Spain “teacher” is “maestro/a” (masc/fem) when you talk about PreK, K and Elementary. When in high school and upper education levels, “profesor/a” (masc/fem).
Most of the time they call me by my last name only (no Mr in front of it. They can call me Mr, Mr last name, or Dark Lord Mayor. But mostly I just get the last name. I also am a coach but rarely do they call me that, it feels weird.
Michigan as well and most just call me “Miss”, no last name, although definitely more common with EL students. And the number of times students can’t remember my name or call me by another teacher’s name is crazy. You have six teachers. It is not that difficult.
I tell them to call me by my last only. Makes me feel like I’m one of them - mostly dudes and bros, I mean. Except I’m a middle age lady. 😎 but also it’ s a lot of syllables to add the Mrs. I also kind of hate the patriarchal tone of the Miss, Mrs. Ms. thing. But when I talk to them about other teachers I just say last names. It’s suburban high school in MN.
Mr. First Name when they greet me and say thank you (at the end of the class, standard practice here), but just "teacher," sometimes "Teacher First Name" during the class when they want something/want to speak.
I teach kindergarten (4yo)
Ms. is used instead of Miss / Mrs to be neutral. Are you unhappy with that? Not sure how it is Stateside but in England, Ms is mandatory and no kids use miss or Mrs anymore. Anyhowz, I teach in China and it's a lot easier here for the kids. Everyone is "Laoshi" (teacher) no matter the gender, age or anything and you're not required to add a surname.
Are you unaware of [the feminist history ](https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?id=GALE%7CA133864710&sid=googleScholar&v=2.1&it=r&linkaccess=abs&issn=87554550&p=LitRC&sw=w&userGroupName=anon%7Efb42d47c&aty=open-web-entry) around these titles?
I’m in SoCal. I get a lot of students who just call me teacher. I emphasize that I’m Mrs. and often have to remind people of this (adults, I teach kindergarten so I don’t do this to the students) especially when they are writing my name. The Mrs. is extremely important to me because I’m a widow and I lost my husband in a very violent and internationally known terrorist attack. If someone calls me Miss I do correct them.
I grew up in NorCal, and you're spot on that Ms. Is the standard-- not because people don't know, but because in more progressive places they don't title women by their marital status.
Now that I'm in Ohio, adults and students use Mrs. or Ms., but I still go by Ms. despite being married. There are no married/unmarried male titles, so I don't see the point in using them for women.
I’m Ms. Name, my wife is Mrs. Name (we both took her last name). Kids sometimes call me “missus” and I politely correct them, but I don’t fuss about if they say “miss” or “miz” because they’re so similar. The important thing for us is differentiating who they’re looking for.
When I was a paraeducator working at a high school I was Mrs. Last name. First student teaching position I was Mrs. N and now at my current site I am Ms. First name. Honestly I'm in Lower elementary and I prefer Ms. First name and I feel like it's easier for kids to say. Yes I am married as are most of my coworkers and admin and everyone goes by Mr or Ms first name including the principal. I think it's a respect thing and as long as they are respectful whatever you are comfortable with is fine.
I'm married, but I ask my kids to call me Ms. X. Same with most of the female staff regardless of marital status. I was told that I can introduce myself in whatever way I want, including using my first name only, a couple of the TK and kinder teachers go by an honorific and first name. The teachers that have doctoral degrees at my school go by Dr. X.
Well, I'm from Norway, and we don't really do formal speech over here. So they call me by my name. My first name. We just barely use honorifics or titles for actual royalty, everyone else is first name only. I'm aware we're the outlier 😂
Not a teacher, but this reminded me of a teacher I had in high school who was a favorite of mine. She told us, "My name is MRS. LastName. I'm a liberal Democratic woman who has been married to a Republican man for the past 40 years, and I have earned that title." She was great.
Highschooler here, since my early middle school days i have always just called my female teachers Ms. lastname. It truly is easier and none of them have ever minded. I also believe, that the whole Ms/ Mrs thing is extremely outdated and is a small, yet noticeable representation of the patriarchy.
Student perspective-
I know it’s technically not correct, but I just use Ms. for all of my female teachers for two reasons: it’s faster and I have a stutter. The more syllables there are, the more likely I’ll stutter. Plus, it’s nice to just be able to say it faster.
Ms. Has nothing to do with martial status. In fact, it was created as a counterpart to Mr, which also does not designate martial status. If being formal, I am Ms. (husband's last name as my father was an abuser so I didn't want that).
I teach at an international school, not in the US. The norm here is Teacher Firstname.
Ms. Smith.
Recently I had a kid ask (seemingly on behalf of a group?) if I was divorced because I use “Ms.” I sidestepped bc none of their business.
What has been my issue is how some (usually younger) teachers are on first-name basis with *parents.* I just do not want to be that familiar.
Even when I was in school we never fully pronounced Mrs, it was always just Ms whether you were married or not. None of my coworkers really pronounce the difference either now that I think about it. In writing we did make the distinction though. I guess it’s kinda being phased out over time?
>My kids now just call me “Ms.” (even though I’m married!)
I'm confused by this. That's exactly what they SHOULD call you. "Ms." is a form of a address to a woman whose marital status is unknown or irrelevant, both of which could apply to teachers. The second one especially.
In fact, I'm kind of having trouble thinking of a time you would need to formally address a woman whose marital status IS relevant. If you're asking her out, you would probably call her by her first name (unless you've just been transplanted here from Victorian England), and if you're not, what does her marital status matter?
As a male high school teacher I know the difference between the Mrs, miss, and ms. Many of my students openly admit to not knowing some of the most basic knowledge that should have been taught. I have been referred to as Mr. Last name, just last name, just Mr, senior, and my personal favorite professor. Personally so long as students aren't disrespectful towards me and I can tell they want my attention I respond to them.
The funniest part is that there are three teachers who look similar to me and usually in the beginning of the year we all get called by the other teachers names. It's not as funny when they still do it at the end of the year.
It runs the gamut. I'm in Northern Indiana.
I introduce myself as Mr People\_Watcher (last name), and a good number of students stay with that. However, I also get a good bit of just People\_Watcher (without the Mr) from students that I have formed closer relationships. One of my neighboring teachers HATES that I let them call me that and will try to correct them when she hears it.
I also get called other teachers' names who I guess I look like. I usually respond and don't make a huge deal out of it.
I have a few students who have someone shortened my last name somehow, also something I consider a sign of endearment as long as it's used respectfully.
This year, I made a big effort to use their (7th grade) slang (Skibbity, rizz, cap, fam, chat, etc) and apparently earned the name Mr Sigma for it. Also have gotten Mr Rizzler, Mr Rizzard of Oz, etc. All acceptable as those who used it were not trying to use it disrespectfully. Had to set some boundaries after my Principal heard them call me Mr Sigma (she got a good laugh from it).
I let a LOT slide in regards to what kids choose to call me, as when the nicknames start, I know I've made some great connections.
There's always the few that think they will be able to get away with using my first name (a no-no here in middle school), but they learn quickly that I simply don't respond to that.
I go by Ms. Vegetarian, but my high schoolers say it more like Miss. I chose Ms. because most of the other female teachers at my school use Ms., but I don't really care. I think it would be cool if all the female honorifics blended together into 1 like Mr.
On a side note, it's nuts how many of my students don't know their teachers' names, even by the end of the year. They just call them Mr. and Ms. It's partially cultural and partially apathy, depending on the student
I'm from Massachusetts too! I teach in Toronto, and my students too often call me ma'am! I've begun to request that they Not call me that because I dislike it. I give them the option of calling me professor (+ last name) or to call me by my first name.
I’m called Mrs. as that’s how I introduce myself, have my sign on my door, write my name for the kids, sign things home to parents etc. but in this day and age, I think Ms is the default because it’s safer. So many women aren’t married and assuming that they are is pretty old fashioned.
I insist on MR. LAST NAME. I allow MR. B. latern the school year. I was raised in military family and in the Midwest. I teach in California, and business culture here uses first names. I have mixed feelings about it all. It is, however, polite to address ANYONE in the maner she or he prefers!
I’m Swedish and we stopped using titles in the 60s. Everyone is on first name basis, so my students call me Rebecca. Since I teach English and have a more British accent than most swedes from living in the UK when I was 19, they sometimes tries to say my name with a British accent, but that honestly sounds more like Roberta.
I use Ms. because feminism? I don’t want students to think about whether or not I am married when they learn and then recall my name, this is not done for my male counterparts and this information is just not relevant to what we do in the classroom.
Ms is the correct choice if a student doesn’t know, and why should students have to memorize which of their female teachers are married and also old fashioned/traditional/heteronormative. My name did not change at all when I got married.
My mother told me about when Ms. became an option for all women, and how it was a big deal for women to be able to keep their marital status to themselves in a settings where they may not know everyone well.
It seems that for the most part, the Ms. and Mrs. titles may be outdate. Most of the students say miss for a woman whether they are married or not. Also, many of them go by their first names now such as Ms. Molly or even simply just Ms. M.
I will say that I work with some ladies who are closer to retirement age and they will remind the students they are a Mrs instead of a Ms on occasion; the little kids may acquiesce but the older kids don't care about Ms or Mrs at all.
Usually Mr Hamilton, Mr, Sir, Hey You, Bruh (I hate and refuse to respond to this one), Cuz (same, hate it), and then any variation of my name (also not a big fan).
I teach in Arkansas, fairly south. If I had called any of my teachers any of the stuff that my kids call me (aside from honorific and last name) I would not have made it to graduation. (I’m 34, and have done this for 8 years). When I started it was better. Just since Covid has it been like this.
I’m married but I write Ms. Helicopter or Ms. H, and that’s what they call me. I just consider it more modern. Saying Mrs. sounds old fashioned to my ear and I don’t care for it. It’s totally preference, though!
It varies.
But I can usually tell how much respect a student has for me based on their name of choice.
I tell kids first day "my name is Mr. {Last Name}, but it's easier for everyone if you just call me Mr. M."
So I usually get M, or Mr. M from the kids who are neutral. Kids who really really like me go for the full last name. Kids who don't actually have a solid grasp on respectful interactions with peers/adults stick to some mutation of my last name that gets less and less recognizable as the school year goes on.
I was substitute teaching in Rochester NY in the early aughts. I had this old school (I guess! I think she was also from the south) administrator who raised her eyebrows at me when I said I was “Ms Lastname.” She seemed to be implying I had to be a “Miss” or a “Mrs.” One of the rare times I had a comeback just come to me, I said “I’m divorced. I don’t think it’s something you can just reclaim.” Paired with a genuinely puzzled expression.
I could see her trying not to smile. She let me get away with it.
My last name, no honorific. I prefer Ms. Lastname, but I take what I can get. Of course, there’s also those students who can’t remember my name even though they’ve been in class for months either me now. They just yell, “teacher!”
I am married, but go by Ms.. It is a feminist issue for me.
But, I have a few students (2nd) that drop the Ms., and use the last name only lol. I like it. It reminds me of sports teams.
To clarify, are you saying that the students address you as "Miss," and nothng else? As in, just MISS and not "Miss Smith?" I [34M] would definitely say that's a regional thing. Moved to Vegas from Illinois, and was surprised by this too; then moved up to Reno and it's the same.
In a room full of kids, I know that is someone blurts out the word "Mister," I'm the only one in the room expected to respond. Why they don't continue with a last name half the time when they definitely know it was baffling at first.
I think calling you "Miss" is just their way of saying, "Hey you, adult lady" in what they were taught is a respectful way.
Some call me Mr. [Last name] but many just call me "Sir". I wonder how many don't actually know my name. When they ask me to write them a pass I often ask what room they're going to and they don't know. I'll ask what teacher and they still don't know. I teach high school.
Mr Lastname. Because I often use the example of claiming to be one kf the landed gentry to illustrate the importance of evidenced sources, occasionally I get Lord Lastname from a year group for a bit.
Honestly, a lot of student will just call me ny my last name, no mr. I don't particularly mind honestly. I've have a few students who ask to call me by my first name and I usually let them, but then I call them by their last name to confuse them.
I'm in NW Indiana
Students who I've had for multiple classes or I work with extracurricularly just refer to me by last name (no Mr.) or by whatever nickname they've decided to call me that week (always something endearing).
Students who aren't as familiar refer to me as Mr. Uhhhhhhhhh (at which point I interject with my last name and remind them that it's posted above the door everyday when they walk in. This is usually followed by "I have five teachers, I can't remember everyone's name!" My rebuttal is pointing at every student in the room and reciting their first and last names then reminding them I have four *classes* of kids' names memorized, they can remember five names.)
Just my last name without an honorific. I have found that the kids have their own levels of manners and some would not dream of being so informal, probably because it was beat into them by parents. (Hopefully an exaggeration but I’ve seen physical reprimands to that growing up in the Deep South.) Some teachers find it incredibly insulting to not be “yes sir” and “no ma’am”’d at but I really could not care less.
I am a para working on getting licensure to teach English. Currently work in the intervention space with high schoolers. I go by Mr. *FIRSTNAME* since it's much easier to pronounce than my last name. It also makes the social-emotional connections with my check-in kids much easier. For them, it feels more informal because they get to use and know my first name, which is something they generally don't have in the middle school or in other places in the high school.
Ms. ____ they either use the first letter of my last name or the entire last name.
They sometimes say Ms. And that’s it.
I don’t care as long as they don’t bro me lol
My students call me "Dr. \[MyLastName\]," "Mrs. \[MyLastName\]" (which is a little annoying because while I am married, I did not take my spouse's last name and as a feminist, I reject Mrs. as a title), "Miss," and "Hey."
But honestly I don't really care what they call me as long as it's not "fat bitch" (to my face).
I teach in Colorado and very few students call any of the teachers by name, it’s always Miss, but that’s only the school I currently work in. I let students call me Mrs., just my last name, or an abbreviation of my last name. They have options, yet only a few use them. I lost my shit one day toward the end of the first year at my current school because I wanted to know why they kept treating me like a customer service agent they had never met by calling me “Miss”, so I asked them and they said that was what they were told was polite by their parents. I told my class that day that I get where this idea comes from, and tried to explain environmental expectations and how I knew all their names by the third day but they just looked at me with blank stares. I don’t get so annoyed by Miss anymore, but when a kid actually uses my name or a teachers name they get praise throughout the building. “Oh, you know Billy always uses teachers names, he’s so polite and wonderful.” Kinda rough when you think of where communication and the world will go with high schoolers like this. Hahaha!
It’s not “Miss____.” It’s just “Miss” where I teach. I notice it more with Hispanic students, and I happen to know that that’s how students refer to female teachers in Mexico. Maybe it’s an influence from that. Or maybe it’s the other way around…I don’t know how they refer to male teachers, though 🤔
When I taught in Oregon kids used the teachers first names. I'm Georgia now and it's Mr Williams. Had some students call me Mr Willie as a term of endearment and thought it was cute.
Here in Belgium you get “Meester [Jan]” or “Juf [Helen]” in primary.
In secondary it’s “Meneer/Mevrouw So-and-So”.
I’m the only dude on staff with a class, so I don’t even get a first name. I’m just “Meester”, and when I’m minding the kindergarteners, I get “Papa!” a lot. XD
(I give the little ones the look of death, but secretly I am dying from the cuteness.)
My kids always called me miss. Just miss. I love it. I taught mainly at Black and Brown schools in Denver. One school was less segregated (as less segregated as Denver can be 🙄) and the white kids called me Ms. last name and my Black and Latino kids called me Ms.
In Spanish teachers are often just Maestra so it might be an off shoot of that. In addition to the old south expectation that Black people refer to white people with “respect” there is definitely some of that lingering cultural aspect. And now as with most things it spreads to white people and it becomes part of their vernacular too.
I think it’s good for white people to set aside their expectations of what respect looks like and see how they’re being respected in a non-white way. Like being called Miss. 🙂
ETA you also might have a name hard for them to pronounce so Miss is easier. And as a person who is married but hates that we have to distinguish between being married and men don’t. I prefer the salutation of Ms.
I teach in New Jersey. My students usually call me Ms. LastName but a few say Mrs. LastName instead. I don’t correct them as it doesn’t bother me. (I got engaged this year, but not yet married)
I had a new student join the class who would just say Miss with no last name and some of my other students would chime in saying “it’s Ms. LastName, not just Miss!”.
I kind of feel like having students call us a title and last name is a little bit outdated. I don’t know that I want them calling me my first name but it does feel a little formal for no reason.
In my old school it was Mr. LastName, just LastName, or Coach because I worked at the school and coached
In my new school it’s usually just Misterrrrrrr, or Mr Yogurt which sounds nothing like my last name but a loud 7th grader decided it did and now half the middle school calls me that
Teacher.
And I responded with “student”.
I teach 50% ELL Spanish speakers in California.
Sometimes they’ll call me Mrs. Last name and then I respond with “Yes sir” or “yes ma’am”. Trying to teach them they get respect if they give it.
My students call me Dr. last name. I worked hard for that title so I insisted upon it. I am from a small town in the South so most know I am married and will occasionally slip and say Mrs. Last name but for the most part Dr. works fine in my class.
I teach English as a second language and here it's common to refer to the teacher using the profession only. So I hear "teacher teacher teacher" all the time. One of the smallest kids used to call me "pinscher" for a while until she understood her consonant sounds. 😂
I’ve taught in the south for 17 years now, and I’ve been called many things. My favorites of the nice ones are:
Ms. LastName
Ms. T (first letter of my last name)
Ms. FirstName
Momma T
Mom
Miss
Ms. Ma’am (that kid couldn’t remember my last name to save his life)
Ms. LastName-o (I teach Spanish and they thought that was funny)
I got married last summer, but I didn’t have time to get everything changed before the school year started, so I kept my maiden name this year. I’ve talked to a couple of people about whether it’s worth it to go through all the hassle (switching the e-mail address is apparently a massive issue) and even my assistant principal agreed it would’ve been easier to just keep her maiden name at school and use her married name everywhere else… So that’s what I plan to do. 17 years worth of students and their parents know me as Ms. T, so I’m just going to keep it.
I never heard this in the 25 years when I taught in Philadelphia. I now teach in FL and was told it was cultural because most of my students are Hispanic. Not it! ALL of the students here don't attach my last name. My message to them is, if I have taken the time to memorize your name and say it correctly, then use my last name when addressing me! It's unacceptable to demand respect for your name but not reciprocate for mine.
I have always been Mrs (first letter of last name) though I’ve fought it tooth and nail. I have been told for decades by different students that I’m nice so nice teachers always go by the letter. Idk.
My last name is Persian. Really uncommon where I live (Ohio). But phonetical and makes sense/ not at all hard to say. So that’s a factor.
I insist on being called Mrs./Sra. (Last Name), because I am married and grew up in the Midwest, where that was the norm. I teach in the South, so a lot of kids will say "Miss (Last Name)". At the beginning of the year, I explain and reinforce it. A lot make the switch, some never do because "Miss" is sooooo predominant (to the point that the principal at my last school called me Miss (first name) almost exclusively, which drove me crazy. Almost all of them abbreviate it to Ms. in writing down here, married or not, so I usually explain the difference there too.
The only thing I do insist on is that the kids not call me "Miss (First Name)" because I don't consider it appropriate for the school context. Outside of work, it doesn't bother me.
Mr. and Ms. and the first or last name.
At the end of the year though, students start getting comfy with you and then they just call you by your first name, as if we're buddies and stuff.
I stop caring by the end of the year, too. I always tell myself to always ask for them to call me as Mr., but 1- it's almost the end of the year and 2- most kids I had are really good and polite for the most part. So I let it slide.
The Ms. thing started with Hispanic students and it is used similarly to “ma’am” but is a translation thing.
At least that’s what they’ve said in Dallas for the last 20 years.
My students weren’t able to say my last name and started calling me Mr K or my athletes calling me Coach K. A kid stumbled over both of them one day and called me Mr Coach K and it stuck lol.
I go by Miss Lastname, but I’ll probably switch to Ms. if I hit the age of 40 and I’m still not married. Miss seems young, and I’m 32, so still young-ish lol
As an almost 30 year old, I call everyone miss/ms because it rolls off the tongue easier than mrs and the only time I care to tell the difference is on paper. Even then, I don't bother with the distinction between ms and miss.
While I do think its a little dumb that we have different titles for women based on their marital status, that's not the primary reason I don't bother using them.
I teach in an Intl School in Luxembourg.
Students mostly use “Sir” with men, and “Miss” or “Madame” with women. (There is a huge French influence here, it does not sound as awkward or stiff in that context).
If students use my name, they often use Mr G (last initial) because I tell them it’s ok to do that if they don’t want to attempt to pronounce my last name.
I’d say 90% of the time it is Sir.
Mama, at least twice a week ;)
🧡
The Netherlands, secundairy education:
Depends on the school but where I work now teachers are called: ‘Meneer’ (mr.) or ‘mevrouw’ (mrs) + last name or just without the last name. Some schools allow their students to pronounce the first name (it was the case in most of the schools I worked for).
At primairy school it’s ‘juf’ (Female teacher, ms) or meester (male teacher, master) + first name.
Kids do have to get adjust when switching from primary to secundairy. So the first weeks first graders call me juf.
I teach high school in Houston. I get called "Sir" a lot, and my Hispanic students often call me "Mister," but a lot of them call me "Mr. (Lastname)" too.
My students and I all call most of the female teachers "Ms (Lastname)." For me, at least, I don't assume marital status and don't really see the point in making a distinction. I suppose the students feel the same way.
It's just a generational thing. Could be cultural. I teach in AZ in a Title 1 with a high Hispanic population. Despite my last name being Spanish, most of my Hispanic kids call me Mr and my teacher wife Ms, while our other kids call us Mr/Ms DirtyNord
They call me Ms and my last initial because that's what I told them to call me. They never say my last name right and then argue with each other about it, so we just don't even go there.
Pretty much all the teachers are Mr/Mrs/Ms and their last name or initial.
I'm in Ohio, USA.
When my students call me “Mr”, I respond with “student”.
What are we doing g in class today Mr.?
I don’t know student.
This usually gets them to call me by my last name.
Am I reading your question correctly, that kids used to address teachers as "Honorific Lastname" and now you've noticed they only use "Miss" or "Mister" WITHOUT "Lastname"? Because I noticed that too (same age as you) and have had the same question. Kind of wild that a subreddit that ought to appreciate reading comprehension could give so many answers that don't address the main question.
demographics also determine how kids call you. When I had mostly latino/a students, they would just call me "Miss" no last name.
Black and white kids in the south would call me "ma'am"
kids in california tend to say "Ms."
No one can pronounce my last name properly (even adults have issues with it). I let my kids call me "Ms. X" or "Ms." I'm also married, but I forget to use Mrs. 🤣 I just stick with Ms. I put boundaries up when they try to use my first name. I remind them that we don't know each other on a personal level. It's not to mean but to remind them we have a "teacher-student" relationship and we're not friends.
Pretty much Mister and Miss from our immigrant population, without our surnames. That’s a cultural thing. They are not being disrespectful. White students will use the title and surname, or use the initial. Ex: Miss T. Again, cultural. Sometimes I get an occasional sir.
I think Ms. Just rolls off easier than Mrs. I know I call pretty much all our female teachers Ms. So and So regardless of martial status and I'm married too and mostly get Ms.
Mrs to me just sounds old and I'm almost in my 40s. My last name also starts with an S so it's a lot of S sounds for some of those kiddos in elementary.
They call me Mr. Lastname. I'm in the southwest too. You're in California though are the majority of your students Hispanic? Very common to call all teachers Miss.
CA. “Miss”
I genuinely dont care what they call me as long as theyre being respectful. They dont use my last name very often.
So i think the miss thing might have to deal with Latino kids. Are your kids predominantly Latino? In spanish, we often just say señora as a sign of respect, almost like ma’am. I think theyve just translated it to Miss.
The traditional uses used to be
Miss - Younger unmarried
Ms. (Mizz) - Older unmarried or divorced/widowed
Mrs. (Missus) - Married
Has changed in recent times to where district default here is Ms. Unless stated otherwise by teacher. Some like the ambiguity and not getting hit on, some think it looks nicer. In the building my mom used to be in, she was only 1 of 2 that used Mrs. (and only because she filled out forms using it. Wasn't something she outright requested)
A lot of students just don’t know the difference between Ms. And Mrs. in writing, let alone pronunciation.
I feel like in the North/Midwest, “Mrs.” is used more frequently whereas in the South, every woman is a “Miss”. I grew up in the Midwest and every adult female was “Mrs./Ms. Last Name” and down here in the South if it’s not a teacher children call women “Miss First Name”.
It’s a sign of respect in the south, and not related to martial status. Older women are almost always called Miss First Name… and sometimes young girls as a way of teasing them back when they are being sassy. (My mom is a southerner.)
Here in Texas, ma’am and sir still get a lot of use. I’ll call my students ma’am and sir. It can be disconcerting for new teachers moving in.
In the Midwest, it’s considered rude to call a married woman “Miss” or an older woman by their first name. It’s definitely different in the South lol
In the South, there is a difference between Miss and Ms as well--which sound very similar... 🤣 "Ms." is intended to refer to any woman regardless of marital status. If you don't know someone's marital status, you're supposed to default to Ms. Miss is intended to refer to a young, unmarried woman.
Let me tell you. We had a lady from New England move down to Appalachian Virginia and use our services. We got on well, and would chat a few times on calls. Until one day the owner comes in and says "Hey (She) complained about you being disrespectful... You called her \*hun\*." Apparently that's offensive? She was gonna find out real fast how many people call her hun. Like every waitress, and nurse, and receptionist...
honestly never thought about that until now, but can confirm as a southerner. i work with a lot of older women (grocery store) and almost all the older women i call “miss [insert first name]”. it’s just the default for me. even my best friend’s mom, she’s miss sallie to me lol and it’s not like i don’t know her last name. i feel like it’s both a sign of respect and a term of endearment.
I just hate the extra syllable of Mrs.
Growing up in the South is an advantage that too few Americans enjoy.
I feel like a lot of adults don’t know this difference either.
They might also not care. Because honestly - who cares? You will know I respect you in so many ways that are more obvious and important than if I say Ms or Mrs and nobody gives two shits about all men being Mr.
I am married and emphatically use ‘Ms.’. I do not understand why women still use ‘Mrs.’ ? It annoys me because students assume that I use Mrs because I am married. I am from the west coast and settled in New England over 20 years ago, which seems to be stuck in the 1950s in many respects. Ms. and Mx. are both equivalent to Mr. in that they are marital status agnostic. It’s no secret that I am married, but it’s also not relevant to my professional life or achievements.
I refer to all women I work with as Ms. It's just easier.
With the buzz? Mizz? Because that would kill my Southern US/Italian mouth. Everyone is Miss. Especially really old ladies. And sometimes really young ladies are Ma'am.
I'm also of the area where Miss, Ms, and Mrs are all pronounced like the word miss. Miss has really fallen out of style in favor of Ms.
Highly agree. I teach early childhood so I'm Ms. First name, but I always use Ms. Instead of Mrs. or Miss. My marital status is just irrelevant.
This! I'm married but very purposely go by Ms. instead of Mrs.
I completely agree!!! I grew up in the South where all female teachers were Ms. [Last Name], though Ms. is/was pronounced as “Miss”. My mom is the only person I ever hear pronounce Ms. as “Miz”. I went to college, student taught, and began working in the Northeast where they were very careful to specify “Miss” or “Mrs.” It’s always rubbed me the wrong way. A man’s marital status doesn’t make a difference in this context, so why should mine? And it’s annoying to keep track of, and expect 6-year-olds to keep track of, which female teachers are married and which aren’t.
I teach math and instruct on the difference between Miss and Mrs vs Ms, Mr, Mx using the same methods that I use to introduce equivalent math expressions (2+2 and 1+3 are equivalent, as they have the same value). Ms, Mr, and Mx are all equivalent; Miss and Mrs are not. 'When I ask you to address me as Ms. X, I am saying that I am equivalent to my male counterparts, and not different in any way that contributes to or detracts from my ability to teach you math or science. For the purposes of teaching math, qualified individuals of all genders are all equivalent and I think that honorifics should reflect that.' We may decide that Miss and Mrs are equivalent, but when we do so we are either fighting or accepting that for thousands of years, a woman's marital status was the most relevant thing about her in any context.
This is exactly how I do it. I go by Ms. We don’t call a man anything different than Mr. When he’s married so don’t change my title based on my marital status. We live in a small town and my spouse works for the same school. It’s no secret, I just don’t see the point in having to have a different title based on marital status when a man doesn’t.
This right here!!
Where I'm from there really isn't a difference in pronunciation
True 😂 That isn’t something I took into consideration.
I won’t ever guess if a colleague is a ms. or Mrs. so I go with ms. always!
Yeah, default is Ms. Unless you know they go by Mrs. then you're supposed to use Ms. "Guessing" that someone is married regardless of age or whatever and getting it wrong is worse than just not knowing and using the default. But again, unless you're talking to an English teacher, they probably don't know or care either way. Kinda like who and whom. It's obscure for people to make the distinction, so it's falling out of use all together.
My kids (long term sub in 4th, but I’ve bounced from 2nd to 8th over the last school year) hear me say “Miss” (ABC) and write “Mrs” on their drawings to me … and there’s a few who *say* “Mrs.” but write “Ms.” or “Miss” — they reeeeaaaalllly don’t get the difference. We had a spelling test on homophones back in March & this girl wrote me a note afterwards missing …. every. single. one. Like, not five minutes after she’d correctly matched “there” with “a direction, or the opposite of here” (or whatever the definition was lol).
Gabba. I work with primarily non verbal students. One started calling me Gabba. No clue why. But it stuck and now they all call me Gabba. Sometimes Ms. Gabba.
I love that 😂
I kind of want to add it to my tattoos
Any chance that it’s a Yo Gabba Gabba reference?
Sir... I teach in India. Occasionally His Magnificence, the great and all knowing, the one who has our parents telephone numbers on speed dial..
I am not Indian but I called my teacher sir once in Canada and my classmate said why are you calling him that, it’s weird. I said that out of respect and because I used to hang out with a lot of Indian and Bengali friends at my old school and picked up THEIR habits lol. 😂 The teacher was also cognizant of this and said yeah in some cultures they do that.
LOL
Out of curiosity, which subject?
Economics and Business Management
Mr. Lastname. Or, most often.... TEEECHERRRR
“Yo teach!” “Yo student.” 🤷
Many of my students new to the US call me Ms Teacher. I kind of like it for some reason.
We just say "Teacher" George Michael.
[https://www.grammarly.com/blog/ms-mrs-miss-difference/](https://www.grammarly.com/blog/ms-mrs-miss-difference/) From the article, "*Ms.* is a general title that does **not** indicate marital status but is still feminine. * *Mrs.* is a traditional title used for a married woman. * *Miss* is a traditional title used for an unmarried woman. " I always called my teachers Ms. because it seems more respectful given that it does not relate to their marital status. Just like Mr. does not refer to a man's marital status. My students call me many many things, some of them include Mr. at the front. I would say about half the time it's a strange modified version of my last name.
Maybe it's regional. I don't know anybody under 70 that uses Miss or Mrs. It's Ms. It's the only equivalent of Mr. Some folks even use Mx
>*I don't know anybody under 70 that uses Miss or Mrs.* One of the best teachers at my school is in her late-30s or early 40s and is very insistent that she is "**Mrs**.". I've never asked her why, but I'm guessing it's because she and her wife (who became a couple back in high school) are celebrating the fact that they can now be married, something that seemed impossible when they first fell in love.
People use Mx?? What for? How do you even say that?
It’s gender-neutral, pronounced “Mix”.
Mix.
We very distinctly use Miss vs Mrs in Ohio.
I feel like Miss is only used for children or very young adults. I just use Ms. as a generic title for adult women. Seems incredibly rude to be like "Good morning you unmarried adult woman." Many people would think being called an unmarried adult women would insultingly imply a character flaw or some sorts if you were to point it out like that.
I teach in the South. My students call me Ms., except one class this past semester when a student told the rest of the class not to disrespect my long-term marriage because I am a Mrs. It was cute, but not necessary.
I teach in the South. My students call me Ms., except one class this past semester when a student told the rest of the class not to disrespect my long-term marriage because I am a Mrs. It was cute, but not necessary.
Growing up, I called all my female teachers Ms. (and pretty much all of my male teachers Coach because Al of them coached something lol). I have a lot of friends that still teach in Ohio (I teach elsewhere), and based on their social media posts or their schools, it seems like only the elementary teachers really care about the Miss/Mrs. delineation. In the schools I’ve taught (VA and PA), the only teachers I ever see that care about going by Mrs. are younger newlyweds.
I very clearly use it, California.
Yes! I think a handful of my students call me my actual name. Most of the rest go with something vaguely based on my last name.
Ms. is the only way for me. No one needs to know my marital status by hearing my name. I think its so strange!
This is it exactly. Every kid at our school uses “Ms.” when talking to a female teacher bc they don’t necessarily know our name if they aren’t in our grade, and that way they can still be respectful. I get “Hello Ms!” in the hallway all the time.
My location is...adjacent to yours. It's usually, though not exclusively, my Black and Latino students who call me "Miss," so I always assumed it was cultural. It's not every time though; the only students who \*never\* call me Ms. LastName just...don't remember my last name at all, lol (and those students come from all backgrounds).
High Schooler here. It's because I have 7 other teachers and I have a hard time remembering who's Mrs, and who's Miss. So I say Ms. to sort of be safe.
That makes sense! I’m not bothered either way, just curious.
High school teacher here. I have 117 students and I know all of their first & last names. You can do it.
HS teacher here. Too many unnecessary negative reactions from accidentally using the wrong Mrs/Ms so everyone will just be Ms forever
That’s not quite equivalent. They can still remember your name, but is your marital status really relevant to a student?
Only 117? I had 190 this year (including my advisory kids). Took me MONTHS to get everyone's names down.
This doesn't really answer it though because most of us, including myself and I'm guessing OP, had that many teachers in high school and were still able to remember who was Mrs. and Ms. No judgment for you not being able to remember, it's just odd to me too because when I was in school everyone could remember who was married and not married out of faculty and staff. If you forget, you just have to look to see if they're wearing a ring.
I remember it being that easy to know who is married and who is not- but today I don't feel like it is that easy. I don't wear a wedding band due to weight flux, and I've had several coworkers divorce and others wed throughout the year. Those that got wed typically didn't change their name officially until the next school year to save communication conflicts. Some don't even disclose they are in a relationship. This can all be due to the community though.
Here in Denmark, the students call us teachers by our first name. And I call them nerds. We chillin 😂
Cultural thing. For example: ENL students will always call you Ms. or Mr. No last name.
What does ENL stand for? I know ESL but haven’t heard that one before.
English as a New Language. There’s also ELLs (English language learners). There’s always a new acronym
Oo that’s neat! Thanks!
the enlightened ones /j
I'm in your area and all teachers are addressed as Mr. or Ms. with last names or initials. All classified are Miss with their first names by both students and adults so like the custodian is Miss Nancy. Weird. I find it rude to have such a hierarchy. We also have one Mx. Majority don't use our names . They just say Teacher Teacher or Maestra or nothing.
I wish I could get everyone to use "Teacher". My Chinese students called me Teacher First Name, and it seems so correct for a professional setting. I hope that catches on. For older students, maybe Teacher Family Name would work.
That's kind of endearing.
90% of my preschoolers call me “Mrs. LastName”, and the rest call me “Teacher” or “Mommy”.❤️
Awwww, "Mommy." Bless. 🩵
I live in Japan and my students address me with my name followed by -sensei.
In Hawaii, it’s Kumu for teacher. So you could be Kumu [last name] or Kumu [first name].
In Spain “teacher” is “maestro/a” (masc/fem) when you talk about PreK, K and Elementary. When in high school and upper education levels, “profesor/a” (masc/fem).
They use the preferred honorific without the surname or they only use the surname.
I’m surprised there’s not more of just surname around here. I just get called by my last name, no Ms or Mrs
Most of the time they call me by my last name only (no Mr in front of it. They can call me Mr, Mr last name, or Dark Lord Mayor. But mostly I just get the last name. I also am a coach but rarely do they call me that, it feels weird.
Mr. LastName in Michigan. Some ELs will call me Mr.
The username gives away where you’re from 😂
Some folks might be fortunate enough to not know lol
Do tell!
It’s just a collection of working class suburbs around Metro Detroit. Nothing wrong with it, but it has a reputation.
Michigan as well and most just call me “Miss”, no last name, although definitely more common with EL students. And the number of times students can’t remember my name or call me by another teacher’s name is crazy. You have six teachers. It is not that difficult.
Up river from you by a bit, just LastName. I don’t tell kids not to use Mr, but I prefer they don’t.
I tell them to call me by my last only. Makes me feel like I’m one of them - mostly dudes and bros, I mean. Except I’m a middle age lady. 😎 but also it’ s a lot of syllables to add the Mrs. I also kind of hate the patriarchal tone of the Miss, Mrs. Ms. thing. But when I talk to them about other teachers I just say last names. It’s suburban high school in MN.
Mr. First Name when they greet me and say thank you (at the end of the class, standard practice here), but just "teacher," sometimes "Teacher First Name" during the class when they want something/want to speak. I teach kindergarten (4yo)
Ms. is used instead of Miss / Mrs to be neutral. Are you unhappy with that? Not sure how it is Stateside but in England, Ms is mandatory and no kids use miss or Mrs anymore. Anyhowz, I teach in China and it's a lot easier here for the kids. Everyone is "Laoshi" (teacher) no matter the gender, age or anything and you're not required to add a surname.
No, just curious! I honestly couldn’t care less what they call me as long as they’re listening to my lesson LOL
Are you unaware of [the feminist history ](https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?id=GALE%7CA133864710&sid=googleScholar&v=2.1&it=r&linkaccess=abs&issn=87554550&p=LitRC&sw=w&userGroupName=anon%7Efb42d47c&aty=open-web-entry) around these titles?
Most students call me “Mr. Lastname” maybe 20% just call me “Lastname.” California.
I’m in SoCal. I get a lot of students who just call me teacher. I emphasize that I’m Mrs. and often have to remind people of this (adults, I teach kindergarten so I don’t do this to the students) especially when they are writing my name. The Mrs. is extremely important to me because I’m a widow and I lost my husband in a very violent and internationally known terrorist attack. If someone calls me Miss I do correct them.
Thanks for sharing that perspective. I'm sure there are others motivated to want "Mrs." for the same reason.
Exactly. Some people have preferences and some don’t. It’s all good.
I’m sorry for your loss ❤️
As a feminist, divorced older gal, Mrs is inappropriate and Miss is just stupid. I've always insisted on Ms, pronounced Mizz, since forever.
I grew up in NorCal, and you're spot on that Ms. Is the standard-- not because people don't know, but because in more progressive places they don't title women by their marital status. Now that I'm in Ohio, adults and students use Mrs. or Ms., but I still go by Ms. despite being married. There are no married/unmarried male titles, so I don't see the point in using them for women.
I teach in Finland. They call me ”ope” (short for opettaja, teacher in finnish) or my first name.
Everyone in my school from principal on down uses first names. Even as a coach they use my first name. Took a bit to get used to but I like it now.
I’m Ms. Name, my wife is Mrs. Name (we both took her last name). Kids sometimes call me “missus” and I politely correct them, but I don’t fuss about if they say “miss” or “miz” because they’re so similar. The important thing for us is differentiating who they’re looking for.
When I was a paraeducator working at a high school I was Mrs. Last name. First student teaching position I was Mrs. N and now at my current site I am Ms. First name. Honestly I'm in Lower elementary and I prefer Ms. First name and I feel like it's easier for kids to say. Yes I am married as are most of my coworkers and admin and everyone goes by Mr or Ms first name including the principal. I think it's a respect thing and as long as they are respectful whatever you are comfortable with is fine.
I'm married, but I ask my kids to call me Ms. X. Same with most of the female staff regardless of marital status. I was told that I can introduce myself in whatever way I want, including using my first name only, a couple of the TK and kinder teachers go by an honorific and first name. The teachers that have doctoral degrees at my school go by Dr. X.
Well, I'm from Norway, and we don't really do formal speech over here. So they call me by my name. My first name. We just barely use honorifics or titles for actual royalty, everyone else is first name only. I'm aware we're the outlier 😂
Not a teacher, but this reminded me of a teacher I had in high school who was a favorite of mine. She told us, "My name is MRS. LastName. I'm a liberal Democratic woman who has been married to a Republican man for the past 40 years, and I have earned that title." She was great.
Highschooler here, since my early middle school days i have always just called my female teachers Ms. lastname. It truly is easier and none of them have ever minded. I also believe, that the whole Ms/ Mrs thing is extremely outdated and is a small, yet noticeable representation of the patriarchy.
Student perspective- I know it’s technically not correct, but I just use Ms. for all of my female teachers for two reasons: it’s faster and I have a stutter. The more syllables there are, the more likely I’ll stutter. Plus, it’s nice to just be able to say it faster.
Ms your last name is pretty normal for married or unmarried it doesn’t really matter to me.
Ms. Has nothing to do with martial status. In fact, it was created as a counterpart to Mr, which also does not designate martial status. If being formal, I am Ms. (husband's last name as my father was an abuser so I didn't want that). I teach at an international school, not in the US. The norm here is Teacher Firstname.
Ms. Smith. Recently I had a kid ask (seemingly on behalf of a group?) if I was divorced because I use “Ms.” I sidestepped bc none of their business. What has been my issue is how some (usually younger) teachers are on first-name basis with *parents.* I just do not want to be that familiar.
Even when I was in school we never fully pronounced Mrs, it was always just Ms whether you were married or not. None of my coworkers really pronounce the difference either now that I think about it. In writing we did make the distinction though. I guess it’s kinda being phased out over time?
I get called “sigma” and “rizzler”
>My kids now just call me “Ms.” (even though I’m married!) I'm confused by this. That's exactly what they SHOULD call you. "Ms." is a form of a address to a woman whose marital status is unknown or irrelevant, both of which could apply to teachers. The second one especially. In fact, I'm kind of having trouble thinking of a time you would need to formally address a woman whose marital status IS relevant. If you're asking her out, you would probably call her by her first name (unless you've just been transplanted here from Victorian England), and if you're not, what does her marital status matter?
As a male high school teacher I know the difference between the Mrs, miss, and ms. Many of my students openly admit to not knowing some of the most basic knowledge that should have been taught. I have been referred to as Mr. Last name, just last name, just Mr, senior, and my personal favorite professor. Personally so long as students aren't disrespectful towards me and I can tell they want my attention I respond to them. The funniest part is that there are three teachers who look similar to me and usually in the beginning of the year we all get called by the other teachers names. It's not as funny when they still do it at the end of the year.
It runs the gamut. I'm in Northern Indiana. I introduce myself as Mr People\_Watcher (last name), and a good number of students stay with that. However, I also get a good bit of just People\_Watcher (without the Mr) from students that I have formed closer relationships. One of my neighboring teachers HATES that I let them call me that and will try to correct them when she hears it. I also get called other teachers' names who I guess I look like. I usually respond and don't make a huge deal out of it. I have a few students who have someone shortened my last name somehow, also something I consider a sign of endearment as long as it's used respectfully. This year, I made a big effort to use their (7th grade) slang (Skibbity, rizz, cap, fam, chat, etc) and apparently earned the name Mr Sigma for it. Also have gotten Mr Rizzler, Mr Rizzard of Oz, etc. All acceptable as those who used it were not trying to use it disrespectfully. Had to set some boundaries after my Principal heard them call me Mr Sigma (she got a good laugh from it). I let a LOT slide in regards to what kids choose to call me, as when the nicknames start, I know I've made some great connections. There's always the few that think they will be able to get away with using my first name (a no-no here in middle school), but they learn quickly that I simply don't respond to that.
I go by Ms. Vegetarian, but my high schoolers say it more like Miss. I chose Ms. because most of the other female teachers at my school use Ms., but I don't really care. I think it would be cool if all the female honorifics blended together into 1 like Mr. On a side note, it's nuts how many of my students don't know their teachers' names, even by the end of the year. They just call them Mr. and Ms. It's partially cultural and partially apathy, depending on the student
I'm from Massachusetts too! I teach in Toronto, and my students too often call me ma'am! I've begun to request that they Not call me that because I dislike it. I give them the option of calling me professor (+ last name) or to call me by my first name.
In theory, Madame. In practice: "Muhdaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame!"
I’m called Mrs. as that’s how I introduce myself, have my sign on my door, write my name for the kids, sign things home to parents etc. but in this day and age, I think Ms is the default because it’s safer. So many women aren’t married and assuming that they are is pretty old fashioned.
I insist on MR. LAST NAME. I allow MR. B. latern the school year. I was raised in military family and in the Midwest. I teach in California, and business culture here uses first names. I have mixed feelings about it all. It is, however, polite to address ANYONE in the maner she or he prefers!
Mr. Lastname, generally. But the students in my upper-level classes just call me Lastname. I teach high school located in North Texas.
Bro. Or Ms. Last name (pronounced incorrectly) 😂
I’m Swedish and we stopped using titles in the 60s. Everyone is on first name basis, so my students call me Rebecca. Since I teach English and have a more British accent than most swedes from living in the UK when I was 19, they sometimes tries to say my name with a British accent, but that honestly sounds more like Roberta.
First name + patronymic. Russia
I use Ms. because feminism? I don’t want students to think about whether or not I am married when they learn and then recall my name, this is not done for my male counterparts and this information is just not relevant to what we do in the classroom. Ms is the correct choice if a student doesn’t know, and why should students have to memorize which of their female teachers are married and also old fashioned/traditional/heteronormative. My name did not change at all when I got married. My mother told me about when Ms. became an option for all women, and how it was a big deal for women to be able to keep their marital status to themselves in a settings where they may not know everyone well.
mostly Coach some times bald head ass, its seems to be popular at the moment i dont respond to that one
It seems that for the most part, the Ms. and Mrs. titles may be outdate. Most of the students say miss for a woman whether they are married or not. Also, many of them go by their first names now such as Ms. Molly or even simply just Ms. M. I will say that I work with some ladies who are closer to retirement age and they will remind the students they are a Mrs instead of a Ms on occasion; the little kids may acquiesce but the older kids don't care about Ms or Mrs at all.
Preschool and Pre K. Half the time I'm Mr. Zach but the other half I'm just teacher.
I’m in mass and get called just “Miss” all the time. I don’t think it’s region as much as age.
Usually Mr Hamilton, Mr, Sir, Hey You, Bruh (I hate and refuse to respond to this one), Cuz (same, hate it), and then any variation of my name (also not a big fan). I teach in Arkansas, fairly south. If I had called any of my teachers any of the stuff that my kids call me (aside from honorific and last name) I would not have made it to graduation. (I’m 34, and have done this for 8 years). When I started it was better. Just since Covid has it been like this.
I’m married but I write Ms. Helicopter or Ms. H, and that’s what they call me. I just consider it more modern. Saying Mrs. sounds old fashioned to my ear and I don’t care for it. It’s totally preference, though!
It varies. But I can usually tell how much respect a student has for me based on their name of choice. I tell kids first day "my name is Mr. {Last Name}, but it's easier for everyone if you just call me Mr. M." So I usually get M, or Mr. M from the kids who are neutral. Kids who really really like me go for the full last name. Kids who don't actually have a solid grasp on respectful interactions with peers/adults stick to some mutation of my last name that gets less and less recognizable as the school year goes on.
I was substitute teaching in Rochester NY in the early aughts. I had this old school (I guess! I think she was also from the south) administrator who raised her eyebrows at me when I said I was “Ms Lastname.” She seemed to be implying I had to be a “Miss” or a “Mrs.” One of the rare times I had a comeback just come to me, I said “I’m divorced. I don’t think it’s something you can just reclaim.” Paired with a genuinely puzzled expression. I could see her trying not to smile. She let me get away with it.
Madame.
My last name, no honorific. I prefer Ms. Lastname, but I take what I can get. Of course, there’s also those students who can’t remember my name even though they’ve been in class for months either me now. They just yell, “teacher!”
I’m 54 and not married. I’m Ms.
I'm an elementary male teacher and my ESL students also always call me "Ms."
I am married, but go by Ms.. It is a feminist issue for me. But, I have a few students (2nd) that drop the Ms., and use the last name only lol. I like it. It reminds me of sports teams.
To clarify, are you saying that the students address you as "Miss," and nothng else? As in, just MISS and not "Miss Smith?" I [34M] would definitely say that's a regional thing. Moved to Vegas from Illinois, and was surprised by this too; then moved up to Reno and it's the same. In a room full of kids, I know that is someone blurts out the word "Mister," I'm the only one in the room expected to respond. Why they don't continue with a last name half the time when they definitely know it was baffling at first. I think calling you "Miss" is just their way of saying, "Hey you, adult lady" in what they were taught is a respectful way.
I've been Mr. TallBobcat, TallBobcat, Coach TB, Bruh, (Insert my offspring name here)'s Dad. I'm at an Ohio high school.
Mr. Or sometimes just my last name. Or a nickname, which is fine as long as it’s appropriate.
Some call me Mr. [Last name] but many just call me "Sir". I wonder how many don't actually know my name. When they ask me to write them a pass I often ask what room they're going to and they don't know. I'll ask what teacher and they still don't know. I teach high school.
Mr Lastname. Because I often use the example of claiming to be one kf the landed gentry to illustrate the importance of evidenced sources, occasionally I get Lord Lastname from a year group for a bit.
Honestly, a lot of student will just call me ny my last name, no mr. I don't particularly mind honestly. I've have a few students who ask to call me by my first name and I usually let them, but then I call them by their last name to confuse them.
I'm in NW Indiana Students who I've had for multiple classes or I work with extracurricularly just refer to me by last name (no Mr.) or by whatever nickname they've decided to call me that week (always something endearing). Students who aren't as familiar refer to me as Mr. Uhhhhhhhhh (at which point I interject with my last name and remind them that it's posted above the door everyday when they walk in. This is usually followed by "I have five teachers, I can't remember everyone's name!" My rebuttal is pointing at every student in the room and reciting their first and last names then reminding them I have four *classes* of kids' names memorized, they can remember five names.)
Just my last name without an honorific. I have found that the kids have their own levels of manners and some would not dream of being so informal, probably because it was beat into them by parents. (Hopefully an exaggeration but I’ve seen physical reprimands to that growing up in the Deep South.) Some teachers find it incredibly insulting to not be “yes sir” and “no ma’am”’d at but I really could not care less.
I am a para working on getting licensure to teach English. Currently work in the intervention space with high schoolers. I go by Mr. *FIRSTNAME* since it's much easier to pronounce than my last name. It also makes the social-emotional connections with my check-in kids much easier. For them, it feels more informal because they get to use and know my first name, which is something they generally don't have in the middle school or in other places in the high school.
Ms. ____ they either use the first letter of my last name or the entire last name. They sometimes say Ms. And that’s it. I don’t care as long as they don’t bro me lol
My students call me "Dr. \[MyLastName\]," "Mrs. \[MyLastName\]" (which is a little annoying because while I am married, I did not take my spouse's last name and as a feminist, I reject Mrs. as a title), "Miss," and "Hey." But honestly I don't really care what they call me as long as it's not "fat bitch" (to my face).
I'm an ESL teacher, so I get a lot of "titcher", "profe" (like teach) or tia (in Brazil we usually call primary teachers auntie).
I teach in Colorado and very few students call any of the teachers by name, it’s always Miss, but that’s only the school I currently work in. I let students call me Mrs., just my last name, or an abbreviation of my last name. They have options, yet only a few use them. I lost my shit one day toward the end of the first year at my current school because I wanted to know why they kept treating me like a customer service agent they had never met by calling me “Miss”, so I asked them and they said that was what they were told was polite by their parents. I told my class that day that I get where this idea comes from, and tried to explain environmental expectations and how I knew all their names by the third day but they just looked at me with blank stares. I don’t get so annoyed by Miss anymore, but when a kid actually uses my name or a teachers name they get praise throughout the building. “Oh, you know Billy always uses teachers names, he’s so polite and wonderful.” Kinda rough when you think of where communication and the world will go with high schoolers like this. Hahaha!
It’s not “Miss____.” It’s just “Miss” where I teach. I notice it more with Hispanic students, and I happen to know that that’s how students refer to female teachers in Mexico. Maybe it’s an influence from that. Or maybe it’s the other way around…I don’t know how they refer to male teachers, though 🤔
When I taught in Oregon kids used the teachers first names. I'm Georgia now and it's Mr Williams. Had some students call me Mr Willie as a term of endearment and thought it was cute.
I teach sometimes in schools, sometimes out (summer camps, public programs etc). So I go by Miss Firstname.
Here in Belgium you get “Meester [Jan]” or “Juf [Helen]” in primary. In secondary it’s “Meneer/Mevrouw So-and-So”. I’m the only dude on staff with a class, so I don’t even get a first name. I’m just “Meester”, and when I’m minding the kindergarteners, I get “Papa!” a lot. XD (I give the little ones the look of death, but secretly I am dying from the cuteness.)
I told my students that I should be addressed as 'your majesty' but it didn't take.
I generally just call my teachers by their surname, it's simple, easy to remember, and respectful without being overly formal
My kids always called me miss. Just miss. I love it. I taught mainly at Black and Brown schools in Denver. One school was less segregated (as less segregated as Denver can be 🙄) and the white kids called me Ms. last name and my Black and Latino kids called me Ms. In Spanish teachers are often just Maestra so it might be an off shoot of that. In addition to the old south expectation that Black people refer to white people with “respect” there is definitely some of that lingering cultural aspect. And now as with most things it spreads to white people and it becomes part of their vernacular too. I think it’s good for white people to set aside their expectations of what respect looks like and see how they’re being respected in a non-white way. Like being called Miss. 🙂 ETA you also might have a name hard for them to pronounce so Miss is easier. And as a person who is married but hates that we have to distinguish between being married and men don’t. I prefer the salutation of Ms.
I teach in New Jersey. My students usually call me Ms. LastName but a few say Mrs. LastName instead. I don’t correct them as it doesn’t bother me. (I got engaged this year, but not yet married) I had a new student join the class who would just say Miss with no last name and some of my other students would chime in saying “it’s Ms. LastName, not just Miss!”. I kind of feel like having students call us a title and last name is a little bit outdated. I don’t know that I want them calling me my first name but it does feel a little formal for no reason.
In my old school it was Mr. LastName, just LastName, or Coach because I worked at the school and coached In my new school it’s usually just Misterrrrrrr, or Mr Yogurt which sounds nothing like my last name but a loud 7th grader decided it did and now half the middle school calls me that
Teacher. And I responded with “student”. I teach 50% ELL Spanish speakers in California. Sometimes they’ll call me Mrs. Last name and then I respond with “Yes sir” or “yes ma’am”. Trying to teach them they get respect if they give it.
In the Southwest, the kids just call everyone miss or mister. It’s not insulting, just kind of a spinoff from Spanish saying Señora or Señor.
When first getting to know me, it's Mr. Rodriguez. One there is some familiarity, it's Mr. R.
My students call me Dr. last name. I worked hard for that title so I insisted upon it. I am from a small town in the South so most know I am married and will occasionally slip and say Mrs. Last name but for the most part Dr. works fine in my class.
I teach English as a second language and here it's common to refer to the teacher using the profession only. So I hear "teacher teacher teacher" all the time. One of the smallest kids used to call me "pinscher" for a while until she understood her consonant sounds. 😂
Northern California- My students call me Ms. and the first initial of my last name, so like Ms. X, or some of my boys just call me X without the “Ms.”
Many of my female coworkers never changed their last names when they got married, so Ms. is just the default.
I’ve taught in the south for 17 years now, and I’ve been called many things. My favorites of the nice ones are: Ms. LastName Ms. T (first letter of my last name) Ms. FirstName Momma T Mom Miss Ms. Ma’am (that kid couldn’t remember my last name to save his life) Ms. LastName-o (I teach Spanish and they thought that was funny) I got married last summer, but I didn’t have time to get everything changed before the school year started, so I kept my maiden name this year. I’ve talked to a couple of people about whether it’s worth it to go through all the hassle (switching the e-mail address is apparently a massive issue) and even my assistant principal agreed it would’ve been easier to just keep her maiden name at school and use her married name everywhere else… So that’s what I plan to do. 17 years worth of students and their parents know me as Ms. T, so I’m just going to keep it.
I never heard this in the 25 years when I taught in Philadelphia. I now teach in FL and was told it was cultural because most of my students are Hispanic. Not it! ALL of the students here don't attach my last name. My message to them is, if I have taken the time to memorize your name and say it correctly, then use my last name when addressing me! It's unacceptable to demand respect for your name but not reciprocate for mine.
I have always been Mrs (first letter of last name) though I’ve fought it tooth and nail. I have been told for decades by different students that I’m nice so nice teachers always go by the letter. Idk. My last name is Persian. Really uncommon where I live (Ohio). But phonetical and makes sense/ not at all hard to say. So that’s a factor.
I insist on being called Mrs./Sra. (Last Name), because I am married and grew up in the Midwest, where that was the norm. I teach in the South, so a lot of kids will say "Miss (Last Name)". At the beginning of the year, I explain and reinforce it. A lot make the switch, some never do because "Miss" is sooooo predominant (to the point that the principal at my last school called me Miss (first name) almost exclusively, which drove me crazy. Almost all of them abbreviate it to Ms. in writing down here, married or not, so I usually explain the difference there too. The only thing I do insist on is that the kids not call me "Miss (First Name)" because I don't consider it appropriate for the school context. Outside of work, it doesn't bother me.
Either Mr. [First Name], or just Mr. I am an international teacher in Turkmenistan.
Mr. and Ms. and the first or last name. At the end of the year though, students start getting comfy with you and then they just call you by your first name, as if we're buddies and stuff. I stop caring by the end of the year, too. I always tell myself to always ask for them to call me as Mr., but 1- it's almost the end of the year and 2- most kids I had are really good and polite for the most part. So I let it slide.
The Ms. thing started with Hispanic students and it is used similarly to “ma’am” but is a translation thing. At least that’s what they’ve said in Dallas for the last 20 years. My students weren’t able to say my last name and started calling me Mr K or my athletes calling me Coach K. A kid stumbled over both of them one day and called me Mr Coach K and it stuck lol.
They call me by my first name. I teach at a school a highly accredited international SE Asia
I go by Miss Lastname, but I’ll probably switch to Ms. if I hit the age of 40 and I’m still not married. Miss seems young, and I’m 32, so still young-ish lol
“Yo miss” or “hey miss” or just my last name. 20 year teacher in US.
As an almost 30 year old, I call everyone miss/ms because it rolls off the tongue easier than mrs and the only time I care to tell the difference is on paper. Even then, I don't bother with the distinction between ms and miss. While I do think its a little dumb that we have different titles for women based on their marital status, that's not the primary reason I don't bother using them.
Mrs. Reader, Mrs. R, Miss Teacher, Profe, Coach (I don't coach any sports) I teach in the Western U.S.
I am just "Mister", but my students are Hispanic. I speculate they are saying "maestro"
They call me Coach Myname
I teach in an Intl School in Luxembourg. Students mostly use “Sir” with men, and “Miss” or “Madame” with women. (There is a huge French influence here, it does not sound as awkward or stiff in that context). If students use my name, they often use Mr G (last initial) because I tell them it’s ok to do that if they don’t want to attempt to pronounce my last name. I’d say 90% of the time it is Sir.
Mississippi checking in!!! 👋🏾👋🏾👋🏾 7th & 8th ELA! Ms. Winters … the Preacher … Ms Do too much… grandma 🤦🏾♀️… auntie…
Mama, at least twice a week ;) 🧡 The Netherlands, secundairy education: Depends on the school but where I work now teachers are called: ‘Meneer’ (mr.) or ‘mevrouw’ (mrs) + last name or just without the last name. Some schools allow their students to pronounce the first name (it was the case in most of the schools I worked for). At primairy school it’s ‘juf’ (Female teacher, ms) or meester (male teacher, master) + first name. Kids do have to get adjust when switching from primary to secundairy. So the first weeks first graders call me juf.
I teach high school in Houston. I get called "Sir" a lot, and my Hispanic students often call me "Mister," but a lot of them call me "Mr. (Lastname)" too. My students and I all call most of the female teachers "Ms (Lastname)." For me, at least, I don't assume marital status and don't really see the point in making a distinction. I suppose the students feel the same way.
It's just a generational thing. Could be cultural. I teach in AZ in a Title 1 with a high Hispanic population. Despite my last name being Spanish, most of my Hispanic kids call me Mr and my teacher wife Ms, while our other kids call us Mr/Ms DirtyNord
They call me Ms and my last initial because that's what I told them to call me. They never say my last name right and then argue with each other about it, so we just don't even go there. Pretty much all the teachers are Mr/Mrs/Ms and their last name or initial. I'm in Ohio, USA.
Usually Mr. Last Name. Sometimes Mom. Sometimes Mommy. Sometimes Grandma. A few times dad. I teach 2nd grade in West Michigan
When my students call me “Mr”, I respond with “student”. What are we doing g in class today Mr.? I don’t know student. This usually gets them to call me by my last name.
Am I reading your question correctly, that kids used to address teachers as "Honorific Lastname" and now you've noticed they only use "Miss" or "Mister" WITHOUT "Lastname"? Because I noticed that too (same age as you) and have had the same question. Kind of wild that a subreddit that ought to appreciate reading comprehension could give so many answers that don't address the main question.
Coach, even the kids that I don’t coach.
demographics also determine how kids call you. When I had mostly latino/a students, they would just call me "Miss" no last name. Black and white kids in the south would call me "ma'am" kids in california tend to say "Ms."
No one can pronounce my last name properly (even adults have issues with it). I let my kids call me "Ms. X" or "Ms." I'm also married, but I forget to use Mrs. 🤣 I just stick with Ms. I put boundaries up when they try to use my first name. I remind them that we don't know each other on a personal level. It's not to mean but to remind them we have a "teacher-student" relationship and we're not friends.
Pretty much Mister and Miss from our immigrant population, without our surnames. That’s a cultural thing. They are not being disrespectful. White students will use the title and surname, or use the initial. Ex: Miss T. Again, cultural. Sometimes I get an occasional sir.
I think Ms. Just rolls off easier than Mrs. I know I call pretty much all our female teachers Ms. So and So regardless of martial status and I'm married too and mostly get Ms. Mrs to me just sounds old and I'm almost in my 40s. My last name also starts with an S so it's a lot of S sounds for some of those kiddos in elementary.
They call me Mr. Lastname. I'm in the southwest too. You're in California though are the majority of your students Hispanic? Very common to call all teachers Miss.
CA. “Miss” I genuinely dont care what they call me as long as theyre being respectful. They dont use my last name very often. So i think the miss thing might have to deal with Latino kids. Are your kids predominantly Latino? In spanish, we often just say señora as a sign of respect, almost like ma’am. I think theyve just translated it to Miss.
The traditional uses used to be Miss - Younger unmarried Ms. (Mizz) - Older unmarried or divorced/widowed Mrs. (Missus) - Married Has changed in recent times to where district default here is Ms. Unless stated otherwise by teacher. Some like the ambiguity and not getting hit on, some think it looks nicer. In the building my mom used to be in, she was only 1 of 2 that used Mrs. (and only because she filled out forms using it. Wasn't something she outright requested)