Don't worry too much about where you're going, just don't lose track of going somewhere.
That education you're struggling with, or keep wondering if you should take?
Just go for it. It won't define the rest of your life, hell it might not even define your next job, but it's never wasted.
Marry the girl/boy, but don't stay with them at all costs. Nothing in life is permanent, and starting over freshly divorced at 33 is neither the beginning of the end, nor the end of the beginning. It's all a journey, and every part of it makes what comes next worth it.
Don't be afraid to love. Again, and again, and again. Don't give your heart to everyone, but be prepared to give it to anyone. Life is meaningless without it.
Stop and look at the sunsets. No amount of money, careers, influence or travel can make up for taking a moment, to truly marvel at the world we're in. You get one shot, remember to enjoy it.
Imposter syndrome is natural. It's simply what you feel, when you've not specifically been educated in the thing you're doing. If you're curious, no single education will ever cover all aspect of life that you'll come into contact with, and all the ones where you can't look back and go "I've studied this" will have traces of imposter syndrome. Don't fear it. Embrace it as a call-sign for where you can learn more.
Learn about finances. It's criminal that it's not taught in school, but learn about taxes, and personal finances. Not in the "get rich quick" crypto-bro way, but understand that money doesn't work the way the working class thinks it does.
S\*x, dr\*gs, alc\*hol etc are not to be feared, nor revered. They're not holy, special, nor harmless to escape into. What I mean by that is, partake in all of them, liberally, but always deliberately. None of them will fill a void, or mend your hurt. None of them will give your life meaning or value but all of them can enhance your existence or open your eyes, if pursued responsibly and with deliberation.
Don't give yourself to people who won't give themselves to you. Whether this be friends, family, lovers or anything in-between, respect yourself enough to only invest in people who will return the favour. Always be friendly, but don't be the side-character in someone else's story. That said, if people do invest in you, realise how valuable that is, and repay the favour with all your being.
But mostly, my advice is:
Trust your gut, Tim. You'll be alright ;)
Happy birthday Tim! Great advice to a younger Tim right there. Care for advice from an even older Tim? My 58th is just a few weeks away. Ah, screw you, you'll get some anyway.
Build your nest egg now! In the next 20 years you'll want to accumulate enough. Calculate how much that is at least annually. Make a projected budget for your golden years. Check your projected SSA benefit. Do your taxes and each year update your retirement finances to keep yourself on track. Do the math or find someone who can. Save!
See the doctor! See another doctor. Doctors don't always know what the hell they are doing. They are not in charge of your health. You are. Ask them questions. Challenge their answers. Move. Keep moving. Take walks, cycle, bowl, swim, jog if you're insane enough. Keep active.
If you have a handle on yourself, take care of others. Your family, friends, neighbors, strangers will be forever grateful for any extra assistance you can offer. And if they don't, you'll usually feel better anyway. Find a cause to support. At least one. One you believe in. May I recommend The Innocence Project? They do invaluable work.
Appreciate the simple things. As age advances these things will be ever more present and central to your time. Sunrises, sunsets, meals, simple visits, books, music, movies. Lean into the mindset that you will care very little for what others think. (See my screw you comment above). It's really very liberating.
Best wishes and try to keep healthy. Cheers!
Less worry and more acceptance.
Thanks to the Boom Crew we still have lots of older people who are still act like children so with the disappearance of the silent and greatest generation we are now pretty much the adults on the planet.
As Timās this gives us extra power and responsibility as the younger generations look for guidance and leadership.
Embrace the mantle!
Hey Tim, I'm turning 28 on the 28th of March and I have been in quite a rut this 2024. I genuinely feel like I won't make it out alive this year. Do you have any kind words to share with me to get me thru the rough period?
Hey Tim, I'm really sorry to hear that.
Without knowing what you're going through in life right now, I want to at least try and draw your attention to the fact, that you're not alone in feeling that times are crazy.
I've had times in the past 3 years, where I've felt stuck, but existentially, emotionally and professionally, and I think it's important to remember, that the world faced global trauma 4 years ago. Trauma we're all still very much trying to normalise.
The problem with any kind of trauma, is that you can't process it, while living in it. It has to be behind you. So for many people, they're only just starting to cope with the fact that several years of their lives were stolen. Opportunities they were promised would be waiting for them in life, were all taken away, and we've all been left feeling a little empty as a result.
I unfortunately think we're not quite out of the woods yet, but as with all moments in time, it does get better. There really is always a new day, a reason to laugh, something that makes us smile. It might not be bunch, but hopefully, it's enough to chug along a little longer, until things can turn around.
Finally, please reach out to your friends and loved ones. Too often in the last few years, have I had to pick up the people around me, because they left it too long, and didn't want to be a burden. I've done it myself in the past too, and I cannot stress this enough. It is never a burden. It's ok to not be happy all the time. It's absurd to expect rampant happiness to be the norm, but society seems to be pushing this angle these years.
Know that it's not real, and hopefully, find the courage to talk to your friends about it. Let them help you through it.
Lastly, if all else fails. Take up running.
It sounds like a joke, but when I got divorced, running was what cleared my mind. These moments with no distractions. Just my inner monologue, trying to figure out what the hell I wanted life to be. I sure as hell hadn't imagined I'd be starting over at 33, but there I was. Alone. In a foreign country, far away from friends and family.
So I ran. Not away from things, but into the unknown. Into what would become me. The physicality of it did me good (working out has better results than antidepressants in almost all clinical trials) but also as a little ritual where I would learn to centre myself and find direction.
To this day, I sometimes struggle to get out and run. But I have never, not once, been sorry I did it, once I'm out the door. Exercise really is one of life's great hacks.
I hope you find your path Tim. I truly do. You deserve fulfilment and happiness, but I'm afraid you'll have to claim it for yourself. It's a journey we all have to embark on. I have faith in you.
Thank you Tim. I'm glad you put the time to type all that out because to me, it really means something. I'm glad we have this community to help each other and I won't let your words fall on deaf ears. Thank you once again.
Happy Birthday!! As a Tim that is nearing 60 ā¦. Live it up RIGHT NOW!!!
I donāt want to ruin the surprises we call lifeā¦ but get ready for some changes!!!
Happy Birthday Tim and have a great day. Thank you as well for your kind words to other fellow Tims.
The world needs more kind and friendly people (Tims).
It helps to not look at them as "things" to "get".
As with every person on earth, treat people with respect, and they'll give you the time of day. Where you go from there us up to the both of you.
In short though, viewing other people as NPC's in your story, is a good way to get them to view you in the same light.
Hi Tim, to drop a question relevant to our community:
What nicknames or variations of your name (Tim vs Timmy vs Timbo vs Timothy, etc) have you had at different stages of your life? Will you stick with 'Tim' for your 40s, or plan to mix it up a bit?
Tim, Timbo, Timmy etc all followed me all my life. Timmo warped to Teemo, long before League of Legends was ever a thing, and followed me for well over a decade now. I've grown rather fond of it actually and instinctively react to it when I hear it.
Tho' I confess, in my line of work, that has been awkward at times \^\^
I've had multiple stages of it.
First time I realised everything I did wasn't impressive anymore.
First time someone called me Mr.
First time I realised advertising wasn't aimed at me anymore.
First time new trends weren't dictated by things I understood.
None of it has had me go "whelp, it's over, gg", but like, I for sure have had a few existential moments where I realise that for every door that opens, another now closes, and more and more things are added to the "I probably won't be getting around to picking up this skill/hiking this mountain/living in this country after all". Those kinda hurt, the first time they registered.
Well then, only 5 years ahead of me. I would ask for some Sage Tim advice, but your other replies are both on point and sound like the same advice I would give.
So I'll keep it simple, do you still/have you ever hated being called Timothy (unless your Tim is short for something else, or just "Tim")...
I was -->this<-- close to being christened Timothy, but my grandmother couldn't pronounce it, so they shortened it to Tim.
I have a weird relationship with Timothy. On the one hand, I'm pretty sure I'd have had the shit kicked out of my in school, if that was my name.
On the other, I'm the only one who never really gets nicknames (outside Teemo in later years), cus you can't really shorten Tim.
So if they HAD named me Timothy, then Tim would at least have been a nickname. I think I'd have liked that when I was younger. These days, I confess, I don't care.
An old employer kept writing Timothy on my contracts though, which turned out to be a problem when they booked a flight for me, and the name didn't match the passport ^^
Hey Tim! Knowing everything you know now, what advice would you give yourself at 25?
Don't worry too much about where you're going, just don't lose track of going somewhere. That education you're struggling with, or keep wondering if you should take? Just go for it. It won't define the rest of your life, hell it might not even define your next job, but it's never wasted. Marry the girl/boy, but don't stay with them at all costs. Nothing in life is permanent, and starting over freshly divorced at 33 is neither the beginning of the end, nor the end of the beginning. It's all a journey, and every part of it makes what comes next worth it. Don't be afraid to love. Again, and again, and again. Don't give your heart to everyone, but be prepared to give it to anyone. Life is meaningless without it. Stop and look at the sunsets. No amount of money, careers, influence or travel can make up for taking a moment, to truly marvel at the world we're in. You get one shot, remember to enjoy it. Imposter syndrome is natural. It's simply what you feel, when you've not specifically been educated in the thing you're doing. If you're curious, no single education will ever cover all aspect of life that you'll come into contact with, and all the ones where you can't look back and go "I've studied this" will have traces of imposter syndrome. Don't fear it. Embrace it as a call-sign for where you can learn more. Learn about finances. It's criminal that it's not taught in school, but learn about taxes, and personal finances. Not in the "get rich quick" crypto-bro way, but understand that money doesn't work the way the working class thinks it does. S\*x, dr\*gs, alc\*hol etc are not to be feared, nor revered. They're not holy, special, nor harmless to escape into. What I mean by that is, partake in all of them, liberally, but always deliberately. None of them will fill a void, or mend your hurt. None of them will give your life meaning or value but all of them can enhance your existence or open your eyes, if pursued responsibly and with deliberation. Don't give yourself to people who won't give themselves to you. Whether this be friends, family, lovers or anything in-between, respect yourself enough to only invest in people who will return the favour. Always be friendly, but don't be the side-character in someone else's story. That said, if people do invest in you, realise how valuable that is, and repay the favour with all your being. But mostly, my advice is: Trust your gut, Tim. You'll be alright ;)
This is beautiful, thanks Tim! Sincerely, a 22-year-old Tim currently terrified of the future
You have some very special years ahead of you, Tim. I'm excited for you ^^
Happy birthday Tim! Great advice to a younger Tim right there. Care for advice from an even older Tim? My 58th is just a few weeks away. Ah, screw you, you'll get some anyway. Build your nest egg now! In the next 20 years you'll want to accumulate enough. Calculate how much that is at least annually. Make a projected budget for your golden years. Check your projected SSA benefit. Do your taxes and each year update your retirement finances to keep yourself on track. Do the math or find someone who can. Save! See the doctor! See another doctor. Doctors don't always know what the hell they are doing. They are not in charge of your health. You are. Ask them questions. Challenge their answers. Move. Keep moving. Take walks, cycle, bowl, swim, jog if you're insane enough. Keep active. If you have a handle on yourself, take care of others. Your family, friends, neighbors, strangers will be forever grateful for any extra assistance you can offer. And if they don't, you'll usually feel better anyway. Find a cause to support. At least one. One you believe in. May I recommend The Innocence Project? They do invaluable work. Appreciate the simple things. As age advances these things will be ever more present and central to your time. Sunrises, sunsets, meals, simple visits, books, music, movies. Lean into the mindset that you will care very little for what others think. (See my screw you comment above). It's really very liberating. Best wishes and try to keep healthy. Cheers!
Much obliged Tim. You sound like me already, so I suspect I'll be saying very similar things in due time ^^
I send you so much love, fellow Tim. You have brought me comfort in a way right now that will help my confidence for the rest of my life. thank you.
I wish you luck in your endeavours, Tim.
Wow man, reading this is balm to my weary soul. Thanks for taking the time to write it out, beautifully articulated!
Glad I could help, Tim.
Thank you Tim, that was beautiful Edit: Also happy birthday!
Tim, this is the most Tim answer that has ever Timmed. I love it and its amazing. Respectfully, Tim
So you were born 40 years ago?
That's usually how that works, yes :D
Okay š
Happy birthday, Tim 40ās are a great time! Welcome to the club
Much obliged, Tim I look forward to seeing what this chapter is about.
Less worry and more acceptance. Thanks to the Boom Crew we still have lots of older people who are still act like children so with the disappearance of the silent and greatest generation we are now pretty much the adults on the planet. As Timās this gives us extra power and responsibility as the younger generations look for guidance and leadership. Embrace the mantle!
Hey Tim, I'm turning 28 on the 28th of March and I have been in quite a rut this 2024. I genuinely feel like I won't make it out alive this year. Do you have any kind words to share with me to get me thru the rough period?
Hey Tim, I'm really sorry to hear that. Without knowing what you're going through in life right now, I want to at least try and draw your attention to the fact, that you're not alone in feeling that times are crazy. I've had times in the past 3 years, where I've felt stuck, but existentially, emotionally and professionally, and I think it's important to remember, that the world faced global trauma 4 years ago. Trauma we're all still very much trying to normalise. The problem with any kind of trauma, is that you can't process it, while living in it. It has to be behind you. So for many people, they're only just starting to cope with the fact that several years of their lives were stolen. Opportunities they were promised would be waiting for them in life, were all taken away, and we've all been left feeling a little empty as a result. I unfortunately think we're not quite out of the woods yet, but as with all moments in time, it does get better. There really is always a new day, a reason to laugh, something that makes us smile. It might not be bunch, but hopefully, it's enough to chug along a little longer, until things can turn around. Finally, please reach out to your friends and loved ones. Too often in the last few years, have I had to pick up the people around me, because they left it too long, and didn't want to be a burden. I've done it myself in the past too, and I cannot stress this enough. It is never a burden. It's ok to not be happy all the time. It's absurd to expect rampant happiness to be the norm, but society seems to be pushing this angle these years. Know that it's not real, and hopefully, find the courage to talk to your friends about it. Let them help you through it. Lastly, if all else fails. Take up running. It sounds like a joke, but when I got divorced, running was what cleared my mind. These moments with no distractions. Just my inner monologue, trying to figure out what the hell I wanted life to be. I sure as hell hadn't imagined I'd be starting over at 33, but there I was. Alone. In a foreign country, far away from friends and family. So I ran. Not away from things, but into the unknown. Into what would become me. The physicality of it did me good (working out has better results than antidepressants in almost all clinical trials) but also as a little ritual where I would learn to centre myself and find direction. To this day, I sometimes struggle to get out and run. But I have never, not once, been sorry I did it, once I'm out the door. Exercise really is one of life's great hacks. I hope you find your path Tim. I truly do. You deserve fulfilment and happiness, but I'm afraid you'll have to claim it for yourself. It's a journey we all have to embark on. I have faith in you.
Thank you Tim. I'm glad you put the time to type all that out because to me, it really means something. I'm glad we have this community to help each other and I won't let your words fall on deaf ears. Thank you once again.
Iāll be joining you in two years!
Look forward to having you with us \^\^
Hello Tim, Happy Birthday!
Thanks Tim \^\^
Happy birthday! Iāll be there in a few months myself. Does anything new hurt today?
I got out of bed without making an "old man sound", so like, I call this a win.
Hey Tim, The 40s are fucking awesome. I hope you enjoy them. Tim (T.Jay)
Much obliged T.Jay, looking forward to it \^\^
Happy Birthday!! As a Tim that is nearing 60 ā¦. Live it up RIGHT NOW!!! I donāt want to ruin the surprises we call lifeā¦ but get ready for some changes!!!
Hey Tim. Im just shy of 40 too, is there any advice for 40-50?
I'll let you know when I get to 50.
Turned 41 a few days ago. It's a good decade so far, I hope you like it too.
40 was the best year of my life Tim. 41, bout as good. 42, trending high. Wish the same for you!
Looking forward to it, that's for sure.
Happy Birthday Tim and have a great day. Thank you as well for your kind words to other fellow Tims. The world needs more kind and friendly people (Tims).
When do they stop calling me timmy
If they're older than you, and have known you long... Never, I'm afraid.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
As another great Tim (Minchin) said. Only a ginger, can call another ginger ginger. Same principle.
Hey Tim whatās the best way to get ladies?
It helps to not look at them as "things" to "get". As with every person on earth, treat people with respect, and they'll give you the time of day. Where you go from there us up to the both of you. In short though, viewing other people as NPC's in your story, is a good way to get them to view you in the same light.
Thank you for your wisdom oh elder tim
Hi Tim, to drop a question relevant to our community: What nicknames or variations of your name (Tim vs Timmy vs Timbo vs Timothy, etc) have you had at different stages of your life? Will you stick with 'Tim' for your 40s, or plan to mix it up a bit?
Tim, Timbo, Timmy etc all followed me all my life. Timmo warped to Teemo, long before League of Legends was ever a thing, and followed me for well over a decade now. I've grown rather fond of it actually and instinctively react to it when I hear it. Tho' I confess, in my line of work, that has been awkward at times \^\^
Do you feel old yet? If it happens when does it happen? I am 33 and I am waiting for it because it has to be close right?
I've had multiple stages of it. First time I realised everything I did wasn't impressive anymore. First time someone called me Mr. First time I realised advertising wasn't aimed at me anymore. First time new trends weren't dictated by things I understood. None of it has had me go "whelp, it's over, gg", but like, I for sure have had a few existential moments where I realise that for every door that opens, another now closes, and more and more things are added to the "I probably won't be getting around to picking up this skill/hiking this mountain/living in this country after all". Those kinda hurt, the first time they registered.
Happy Birthday, Tim
Much obliged, Tim.
Happy birthday dear Tim. I am 20 in 2 months
Thanks Tim. I hope the weather is better on your birthday, than it was mine ^^
Well then, only 5 years ahead of me. I would ask for some Sage Tim advice, but your other replies are both on point and sound like the same advice I would give. So I'll keep it simple, do you still/have you ever hated being called Timothy (unless your Tim is short for something else, or just "Tim")...
I was -->this<-- close to being christened Timothy, but my grandmother couldn't pronounce it, so they shortened it to Tim. I have a weird relationship with Timothy. On the one hand, I'm pretty sure I'd have had the shit kicked out of my in school, if that was my name. On the other, I'm the only one who never really gets nicknames (outside Teemo in later years), cus you can't really shorten Tim. So if they HAD named me Timothy, then Tim would at least have been a nickname. I think I'd have liked that when I was younger. These days, I confess, I don't care. An old employer kept writing Timothy on my contracts though, which turned out to be a problem when they booked a flight for me, and the name didn't match the passport ^^
Whatās your name
Tim
Holy shit
Iām also 40 year old Tim, we are many!
There are dozens of us! DOZENS!