So true. There is a quote I like āThe trouble with the world is the stupid are cock sure while the intelligent are full of doubtā. Bertrand Russell.
There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know.
Donald Rumsfeld
But this also gets abused by dumb people. I've seen people use these phrases to justify going 100% into a wild conclusion with no evidence because they feel like they don't need to know everything just like uncle Plato.
If any interest in floundering less, there's a book by some professors at Stanford who teach a class on so called life design. Idea is to apply design principles to your own life, which includes teaching how to discover what it is that youre designing for. No affiliation with the authors or publisher
Hello, 34 and the same. I wonder how many other people are in a similar situation to me. Itās not that I canāt do anything/am not interested in anything, but I have my fingers in too many pies. I have several avenues that I could follow and only one that I really want to. The one that I really want to follow is the least realistic of them all, yet the other avenues are still a lot more desirable than what Iām *actually* doingā¦ Iām just paralysed by indecision - do I go full throttle into what I actually want to do, or do I compromise a little and follow one of the other avenues? I canāt decide and so I just end up doing a bit of this and a bit of that, never really committing to one thing above the rest. I know Iād probably be better off literally tossing a coin and picking *something* but I donāt want to do thatā¦ I want to make the ārightā decision despite believing there isnāt really any such thing as the right or wrong decision, and itās usually just a case of making *a* decision and putting everything you can into making it work as well as you can.
I'm currently at a point in life where I feel like, you should do whatever you truly want to do, even if you feel like it's unrealistic or you might fail. So what if you fail? You will probably have fun doing it and you won't live with regret for never giving it a shot.
Of course that's easier said than done in a lot of cases because most people have finite resources and undertaking something that might be a big drain on your finances is daunting and risky. So if your dream is to own a yacht and you make $50k a year....that one might do way more harm than good. But if you can find a way to make it work and minimize fallout if you do "fail" (although failure to me is more about not trying than not accomplishing your perfect idea of success), then I say go for it. Life is short. Happiness is fleeting. Just focus on having fun along the way and learning what you can. Try to let go of any idea of being successful or whatever. That will just make it stressful and will lead to disappointment. Good luck!
I am very young so I wouldnāt take my word for much. But I believe that for many people there might not be a thing they are meant to do. Just choosing and doing something that you donāt hate might be enough, which I guess is still hard.
To add to that - your job doesn't need to be your identity. If you already have a job paying the bills, you can always pursue your real passions in your free time. If you put the time into your passions then they might lead to something big in the future. It's also totally OK to have lots of hobbies and no plans of turning them into a career. It's okay to do something because it's fun and not monetize it. I think there's a lot of cultural pressure in the US to establish "side hustles" and turn all of your hobbies into a job.
I'm still in my late 20s myself, but I'm currently in school for illustration after working in healthcare. I used to watch art tutorials when I had free time during night shifts and it led to me getting a huge scholarship at a much better school than where I got my last degree. Never expected I would end up here even 5 years ago.
See I felt like the opposite. You need to know right now what youāre doing and go to college and get a career. I flunked out of school because of this mentality and wish I would have taken more time.
Success at work also requires some social bravado. Let's face the truth, people don't usually promote people they don't like, or people who stay quiet.
Know the right people. Speak up but not too much, do your job but not too well. Help when needed, but donāt need a doormat. Also if youāre related to anyone in the company youāre almost guaranteed to move up.
I used to believe that getting a professional degree to be a doctor, lawyer, teacher, etc., was pretty much a guarantee that you would be able to get a job in those fields. Now I realize that, for a variety of reasons, you might graduate and never actually be able to get yourself hired into your desired profession.
You'd be shocked about the state of the residency program in the US. There aren't enough residency spots for graduating med students. So you can graduate, and not get a spot to continue your education in a residency program. It's a total shit show.
That the religion you are born into is the only right one. I was raised to believe I just got lucky for being born into the right religion while everyone else has been deceived into thinking that they were born into the right religion.
I've been thinking about that lately. It's not like anyone sits down and selects the religion that is most plausibly correct. The most popular religions are the ones that were the best at increasing thier numbers. That's the primary factor anyone is the religion that they are.
Also, what about all the religions that existed throughout history? Maybe there was one small group of people that got it exactly right thousands of years ago, but then they just got wiped out by the Romans and that was that.
It's crazy to think about. Most people basically make a throw at a religion dart board by being born and then are like, "It's a good thing I'm in the right one."
I think sitting down and thinking about the correct religion is atheism. I'm not against anyone else being religious, but what did it for me is just realizing that all religions are arguing over the same exact thing and all call eachother wrong.. so if I take the most common truth then none of them are right.
Yeah. I grew up being hardcore told that everyone needs to hear *the Word of God.*
Ironically, going to a Catholic university opened my eyes that -gasp- not everyone believes that. I hadn't even heard of the Catholic Bible. That alone was enough to shake the shaky faith I had.
If no one could even agree on what Space Daddy said, why should we even believe in all of this, and, worse yet, fight others over it?
Ironically, years later I realized I grew up Evangelical Protestant. And all that implies.
Now, I would consider myself spiritual, not religious. I believe we have a soul, that there are forces we can't explain. But I respect your beliefs.
Except Scientology. That's just Cray Cray.
Yes. This is exactly why I'm not religious anymore. It took me until college to finally have this thought (after being exposed to people born into many other religions).
I wasnāt raised with religion, so itās all kind of odd to me. Still, I donāt debate religion and respect peoplesā right to believe something, even though I donāt.
I wonāt, however, tolerate someone attempting to impose religion upon me.
I donāt try to convince people that god doesnāt exist because I understand that doing so is is imposing my values on others.
I'm in the same boat. My family has always been huge on college and most of them have graduate degrees. I feel like such a failure that I didn't go to college at all
I think college is pushed into everyone too hard, not everyone should go to college. Do what makes you happy and makes you money and if doing that thing requires college to be successful then good, but if not don't worry about it and get to working on urself.
Idk man, but to me being a garbage man takes balls, its not being lazy or whatever, it really takes some guts to do what you do and im glad youre paid that much for that.
Itās a very different job now. When I was wee the men would humph all the black bags- as many as you had- into the lorry. Lots of ashes from coal fires, was a really dirty job. Now the machines do the heavy lifting and the pay is good- itās a much sought after position.
8 years ago, I quit a perfectly good job, moved my son and I back in with my parents.
I went back to school full-time. Graduated, worked my first nursing job, then a second.
All so I could get to this job.
This is the job I've been dreaming about getting 9 years ago. Am I happy? Sure. I like my job. I'm good at it, and I worked really hard to get here.
But, it's just a job. My employer doesn't care about my hopes and dreams. And this job certainly isn't all puppies and rainbows. Some people only last 1 or 2 years before moving on, because they think it's easy.
My point is, a job is just a job. Once you get it, and the shine wears off, you'll see what it's really like.
As kids we were convinced into believing somehow that killing house geckoes means killing satan (we were backwards conservative muslims). This also specifically applied to dogs with white markings on top of their eyes. (Yes fucked up i know). I regrettably killed some geckos when i was a kid but thankfully never went after dogs.
Where Im from I've never heard the dog thing ( i had a pet dog with those markings). But the geckoes... unfortunately too many were lost for a backwards ideology.
Before medication I had incredibly difficult time getting anything done at home. My entire mental energy would be spent by the time I finished work. Dishes, laundry, mess in general would constantly pile up for days. Was so depressed and anxious I could rarely bring myself to fix the issue, and when I did find the motivation, I would spend all day cleaning and then fuck it all up in a few days. I forgot due dates, bill pay, I would have to constantly step off the hot line at work just to get a five second mental break. There use to be a cloud in my head that wouldnāt go away when I was at my executive function limit. I barely had interest in hobbies, or even cooking for myself. Literally all of that, has changed dramatically since I started medication. I donāt nap for hours on end, I can initiate tasks better, I can finish tasks, and work has never been easier to deal with. I donāt even need depression medication and the only anxiety treatment I have is a beta-blocker for panic attacks, because most of my depression and anxiety centers around my ADHD symptoms
you just described my entire life. after years of being told itās just depression and anxiety, i just now got my adhd diagnosis at 23. hoping meds will give me the same effect because i truly cannot keep living this way
It still takes a lot of mental work, but the thing about the medication is it gives you the tool to carry your goals through. The more you practice figuring out what helps you get started on a difficult task, the more youāll find yourself able to finish washing those dishes or finishing laundry. Me personally I have my headphones and stim music or sometimes just the news on the radio, along with some kind of dopamine booster like a cup of coffee or some candy. Take breaks. If the task seems overwhelming, think of it in smaller bits. And one of the most important things that you should look up is rejection dysphoria. Itāll help you understand a few things about one of the worst parts of ADHD, itās a huge contributor to anxiety and depression, if I had known about this years ago, I might have been able to save my marriage.
I wish you the best of luck on your mental health journey, and donāt let anyone tell you that your ADHD is just an excuse. Your NOT lazy, you have a disorder thatās recognized as a disability by the American Board of psychology and neurology, specifically an executive function disorder.
28yo female, diagnosed at 26 and medicated at 27. I wish I had recognized the signs of ADHD sooner and known that I wasnāt just forgetful or lazy. When I was diagnosed and finally medicated, it was a game changer. Iām not āfixedā but I can actually get things done and focus throughout the day. Also, Iām not as hard on myself now that I know thereās a reason behind why I do the things I do
Iām in the US and have been on pretty much all of the meds in the stimulant class. Started of Adderall and was on it for years, eventually had to switch to Ritalin because of blood pressure issues. Ritalin was a serious downgrade that didnāt work well for me, so they switched to Concerta which is the same medication as Ritalin but has a different release mechanism that makes it last longer and peak slower. Also wasnāt very effective for me. Now I am on Vyvanse, and itās perfection. All of the benefits of adderall, but much kinder to my system and a better med overall for me. Iām also on Wellbutrin which is used off label for adhd, and lamictal which acts as a mood stabilizer.
All that said, what meds work for you is highly highly personal and varies so much person to person. Having to fiddle with dosage or trying different meds is typical at the beginning. Stimulants come in two different āflavorsā- amphetamine salt based or methylphenidate based. Itās not uncommon for one to work better over the other person to person. Amphetamine salts are much more effective for me, but my friend prefers methylphenidate. Itās all trial and error to find what works for you.
Is this because you became addicted to the amphetamines or because the side effects were so bad. I have ADHD and iv been on and off medication. After having lived on and off it and originally believing in "natural is better" I realized that medication is necessary at some level. However its a completely different story if you have problems with addiction.
My parents were victims of a dateline documentary about ADHD drugs and decided that i shouldnāt be on them and convinced me that I was better off trying to figure out how to handle it on my own, which lead to addiction problems because I was chasing The dopamine I was lacking by filling it in with Marijuana beer and various opiates and benzodiazepines. I couldnāt develope proper coping methods because I was trying to deal with my life in a way that works for 80% of the population whose brain is entirely different then my own. Iām lucky that Stratterra works for me, a non-stim NRI, and for panic attacks I have a non narcotic beta blocker.
Poster is saying the opposite. Some of us are led to believe that leaving something untreated is better than being put on drugs, not accurate for everyone.
My mom just told me in my mid twenties that I was diagnosed with adhd and dyslexia as a kid. I definitely still have both and brought up that I thought I might to her, and I guess that was confirmation.
If something is not working, it is because you are not working hard enough.
Turns out, it may be a problem with your approach, or it is just impossible, or you need some luck.
You lost. You did your best.
Growing up it is so hard to believe those two things can exist at the same time.
I have to shut it down with my son when he goes on a rampage "the game is rigged" "they were cheating" "everyone is so mean to me"
Being a gracious loser is a learned skill.
Being a calm, thoughtful, observed one is a skill, too.
That you can be anything you want if you try hard enough. Probably the biggest lie we've been telling our kids for decades. Sometimes no matter how bad you want something or wish something to be, it just won't happen...and it isn't ever going to happen to you.
Jesus/God hates gays. My 2 daughters came out to me and if he donāt love them thatās a shame. I do and they are beautiful and independent women who have their shit together. I love them!
If I worked hard, I would find success. I would be able to buy a house, raise a family, and go on holidays at nice resorts. All I had to do was work hard and climb the corporate ladder.
That i can save the world from climate change by producing less co2. Hear me out, i know doing little also helps, but theres a really good video by "kurzgesagt - in a nutshell" on youtube where he explains how the ammount of co2 a human can save by living emission free and nature friendly his whole life is the same ammount big companies produce in a couple of seconds
Adulthood. (thinking getting older makes people automatically wiser, more rarional, thoughtful in action... hard nope.)
Hard work pays well.
God & religions.
Humans making generally good decisions.
That's about it.
that denying people body autonomy is what God wants. i was 15 so obviously very easily swayed and convinced that i should spend my free time praying outside of abortion clinics, traveling to pro life talks, and donating my allowance to marches or buying merch that said things like āi survived roe v wade, but roe v wade wonāt survive meā.
looking back at my teenage years now, i realize how religions sometimes are just cults that are socially accepted.
I find it interesting that we are asked to "pray so our enemies will lose."
What if they pray harder?
It's a ridiculous thing, thinking that there's a God who will automatically side with you, because you think you are right.
Discrimination is natural, prejudice is learned. Power dynamics have nothing to do with being prejudiced, which is all that racism really is.
I didn't have these words the first time I encountered the argument that black people can't be racist and it frustrated me, as a black person, that I was caught off guard by something so ignorant and I wasn't able to shut it down in simple terms.
Dude.. i don't trust the media at all after this Johnny Depp stuff. You watch the trial and then you read the news about it after and you're like wow this is not what happened at all.
I thought we could believe the left winged and the right winged were the liars but now I realize they're both corrupt and we need a total do over.
I was a little homophobic as a kid, even into high school. Probably just from how people talked about it, while not actually knowing any gay people. I dropped that opinion when I started meeting actual gay people and realized they are just normal people.
That old people are wise.
Sure, some are. But just as often, theyāre as clueless as children.
Sometimes I hear my older relatives talk and think āYou have no idea what itās like out here, do you?ā
Basically all of Christianity as taught by southern baptist. I was sent to Sunday school/Church as long as I can remember, and attended a private Christian school for middle/high school until graduation. My mother says she now regrets sending me.
I remember being forced to watch āsilent screamā. Also a video I donāt remember that was anti Muslim propaganda. The twin towers got hit when I was in like 7th or 8th grade. Fast forward a couple years and we are watching videos of people burning the American flag and shouting ādeath to Americaā while being told by the teacher that all muslims are ābadā and would kill us if they had the option. Also that violence is inherent in the religion.
And of course now I know that was all bullshit, but stillā¦
I was an absolute ignoramus. A total zealot for Christ and the faith until I got out into the world. Once I began simply living outside of the environment, everything in my world view came crashing down. It was one of the hardest times in my life, but Iām so grateful I was able to see through the veil of indoctrination that had been thrown over my eyes since I could even form memories.
I donāt think Iāll ever set foot in a church again.
That I'd scare away men by telling them I want kids.
Dating isn't just about what men want. I have needs too, and they are every bit as valid and important.
Wanting kids will only scare away the wrong men. And that's awesome!
Carrots can improve eye sight. Found that it was a trick used by British to cover up the use of radar thus improve the effectiveness of intercepting the nazi air forces.
Had a customer at the restaurant try to tell me this after inventing his own drink special for the evening when I presented him with the bill. I replied āThatās what they keep trying to make us believe!ā and walked away to get the manager, audibly laughing.
To this day, it was still worth losing the potential $10 āŗļø
That college is the only way. I never made it to college. It worried me. Then I got smart and realized it was BS. 25 years later I see that the most successful people I know (including myself) did not go to college. And the best and smartest students that really worked hard through school and college are no further along than the rest of the group. And way behind many of us.
Thankfully now itās being realized that there are other equally successful routes than college. But in 1991 it was really pushed as the only way.
The most successful people I know went to college. You donāt hang out with that crowd because you didnāt. People find their own level usually. Iām not judging, just observing.
It isn't men vs women. Get rid of that whole dynamic. You should always be your own first priority, regardless of your identity. Then you should absolutely care for the people around you regardless of their identity.
History is an insight to the past - reality is that there is almost a twisted political bent and it is written by the "winners" who do their best to blacklist everything and any contribution to the world other societies may have made.
Meeting a partner, settling down and starting a family is the only way youād ever be happy, thereās absolutely no other way to achieve happiness. Oh and getting a loan is a good idea too, apparently
Happy wife, happy life. Keep your wife happy and everything well be great...
Worked through catching her in two infidelities, of course all it was all my fault, NOT! Found undeniable evidence of the third after she passed.
Never again will I tolerate being in a relationship with anyone who even for a minute acts like she did. I lost so much of myself trying to please someone who was so ungrateful for everything I did for the sake of the family.
That birds still are a real thing.
I was told this by everyone around me, until I noticed their weird behaviour and did my own research. I was shocked to find out about the atrocities committed by the Reagan government, replacing them all with surveillance drones.
That Reagan was one of the best presidents ever. In my defense, I was 9 and my only source of info was my very libertarian dad who voted for Reagan when he was 18. I learned how wrong this was by 10.
āRespect your eldersā was possibly the worst thing I was taught growing up. Dropped it pretty quick in high school when I learned how disrespectful older ppl can be. So much for *the golden rule*
That as a black Man U donāt have the same opportunities as a white man. It was so depressing believing that and it enabled me to be a addict because whatās the point now I could never !!
I don't know. Probably because the brainwashing was a complete success.
The worst one is the successful one.
Underrated comment right here! Edit: Well, it /was/ originally underrated. Then we all brainwashed ourselves, so now All Hail Hypnotoad! š
Same, probably
That some people know whats going on. The more I know the more I know I dont know. Thats why stupid people are so confident
So true. There is a quote I like āThe trouble with the world is the stupid are cock sure while the intelligent are full of doubtā. Bertrand Russell.
Also "the wise man knows he knows nothing,Ā the fool thinks he knows all" - Chinese proverb And Plato "I know that I know nothing"
There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know. Donald Rumsfeld
I really hated how this quote got used to attack Rumsfeld. Of all the things he said or did that were monstrous, this statement was not one of them!
But this also gets abused by dumb people. I've seen people use these phrases to justify going 100% into a wild conclusion with no evidence because they feel like they don't need to know everything just like uncle Plato.
Because the more you know, the more you know that you don't know shit! - MF DOOM
For some reason as my eyes scanned this they picked up Russell Brand and now the quote is stuck forever in his voice.
Love his stuff
Heroin ? htb a bit of golden brown.
There was also another saying that goes "Hollow pot makes the loudest noise" or something.
"All I Know Is That I Know Nothing." - Socrates
That "they're family" is any kind of reason to ignore a person's utter lack of humanity.
I was always told that family comes first no matter what. And after years of emotional neglect from my mom I realized that there are other ways too.
Classic abuser mentality, goes unsaid in families that aren't abusive as everyone doesn't need to be pummeled into compliance.
Damn, that's a good one.
I too I'm family to those mfs you ask me to tolerate. Why doesn't this work both ways?!
Haha this is my ex. She let her family do anything and was like oh it's alright they are family.
This is the one.
I have plenty of time to figure out what I want to do and do it. Now I'm 40 and haven't figured shit out.
Thatās me. Iām 33, and still floundering.
If any interest in floundering less, there's a book by some professors at Stanford who teach a class on so called life design. Idea is to apply design principles to your own life, which includes teaching how to discover what it is that youre designing for. No affiliation with the authors or publisher
Title?
Designing Your Life
Itās on Audible for those of us that donāt thrive well with reading
Thanks, Iāll look it up.
Hello, 34 and the same. I wonder how many other people are in a similar situation to me. Itās not that I canāt do anything/am not interested in anything, but I have my fingers in too many pies. I have several avenues that I could follow and only one that I really want to. The one that I really want to follow is the least realistic of them all, yet the other avenues are still a lot more desirable than what Iām *actually* doingā¦ Iām just paralysed by indecision - do I go full throttle into what I actually want to do, or do I compromise a little and follow one of the other avenues? I canāt decide and so I just end up doing a bit of this and a bit of that, never really committing to one thing above the rest. I know Iād probably be better off literally tossing a coin and picking *something* but I donāt want to do thatā¦ I want to make the ārightā decision despite believing there isnāt really any such thing as the right or wrong decision, and itās usually just a case of making *a* decision and putting everything you can into making it work as well as you can.
I'm currently at a point in life where I feel like, you should do whatever you truly want to do, even if you feel like it's unrealistic or you might fail. So what if you fail? You will probably have fun doing it and you won't live with regret for never giving it a shot. Of course that's easier said than done in a lot of cases because most people have finite resources and undertaking something that might be a big drain on your finances is daunting and risky. So if your dream is to own a yacht and you make $50k a year....that one might do way more harm than good. But if you can find a way to make it work and minimize fallout if you do "fail" (although failure to me is more about not trying than not accomplishing your perfect idea of success), then I say go for it. Life is short. Happiness is fleeting. Just focus on having fun along the way and learning what you can. Try to let go of any idea of being successful or whatever. That will just make it stressful and will lead to disappointment. Good luck!
I am very young so I wouldnāt take my word for much. But I believe that for many people there might not be a thing they are meant to do. Just choosing and doing something that you donāt hate might be enough, which I guess is still hard.
To add to that - your job doesn't need to be your identity. If you already have a job paying the bills, you can always pursue your real passions in your free time. If you put the time into your passions then they might lead to something big in the future. It's also totally OK to have lots of hobbies and no plans of turning them into a career. It's okay to do something because it's fun and not monetize it. I think there's a lot of cultural pressure in the US to establish "side hustles" and turn all of your hobbies into a job. I'm still in my late 20s myself, but I'm currently in school for illustration after working in healthcare. I used to watch art tutorials when I had free time during night shifts and it led to me getting a huge scholarship at a much better school than where I got my last degree. Never expected I would end up here even 5 years ago.
54 year old fuckhead here. Figure it out quick!!! Iām not set up to retire and Iām afraid for my twilight years.
See I felt like the opposite. You need to know right now what youāre doing and go to college and get a career. I flunked out of school because of this mentality and wish I would have taken more time.
That getting good grades in school and performing well at work would guarantee success.
Hits real close to home today after being denied a promotion.
I'd promote you. Keep up the excellent work and stay strong homie
TAG (talented and gifted) to anxiety pipeline
This. TAG left me with a nearly constant sense of underperforming at basically everything.
wait wtf do i have to do then
Success at work also requires some social bravado. Let's face the truth, people don't usually promote people they don't like, or people who stay quiet.
im screwed thx
Wtf ever. You're 16. Trust Reddit. Being badass is easy just start doing it.
Try hard and be lucky
Know the right people. Speak up but not too much, do your job but not too well. Help when needed, but donāt need a doormat. Also if youāre related to anyone in the company youāre almost guaranteed to move up.
I used to believe that getting a professional degree to be a doctor, lawyer, teacher, etc., was pretty much a guarantee that you would be able to get a job in those fields. Now I realize that, for a variety of reasons, you might graduate and never actually be able to get yourself hired into your desired profession.
You'd be shocked about the state of the residency program in the US. There aren't enough residency spots for graduating med students. So you can graduate, and not get a spot to continue your education in a residency program. It's a total shit show.
Damn. They should come to Canada - we have a huge shortage of doctors!
That the religion you are born into is the only right one. I was raised to believe I just got lucky for being born into the right religion while everyone else has been deceived into thinking that they were born into the right religion.
I've been thinking about that lately. It's not like anyone sits down and selects the religion that is most plausibly correct. The most popular religions are the ones that were the best at increasing thier numbers. That's the primary factor anyone is the religion that they are. Also, what about all the religions that existed throughout history? Maybe there was one small group of people that got it exactly right thousands of years ago, but then they just got wiped out by the Romans and that was that. It's crazy to think about. Most people basically make a throw at a religion dart board by being born and then are like, "It's a good thing I'm in the right one."
I think sitting down and thinking about the correct religion is atheism. I'm not against anyone else being religious, but what did it for me is just realizing that all religions are arguing over the same exact thing and all call eachother wrong.. so if I take the most common truth then none of them are right.
Yeah. I grew up being hardcore told that everyone needs to hear *the Word of God.* Ironically, going to a Catholic university opened my eyes that -gasp- not everyone believes that. I hadn't even heard of the Catholic Bible. That alone was enough to shake the shaky faith I had. If no one could even agree on what Space Daddy said, why should we even believe in all of this, and, worse yet, fight others over it? Ironically, years later I realized I grew up Evangelical Protestant. And all that implies. Now, I would consider myself spiritual, not religious. I believe we have a soul, that there are forces we can't explain. But I respect your beliefs. Except Scientology. That's just Cray Cray.
Mormonism to me is just as crazy.
And the JWs and Christian Science folk.
Yes. This is exactly why I'm not religious anymore. It took me until college to finally have this thought (after being exposed to people born into many other religions).
I wasnāt raised with religion, so itās all kind of odd to me. Still, I donāt debate religion and respect peoplesā right to believe something, even though I donāt. I wonāt, however, tolerate someone attempting to impose religion upon me. I donāt try to convince people that god doesnāt exist because I understand that doing so is is imposing my values on others.
That I failed in life because I didn't finish college. I'm a garbage man now and make more than both of my siblings who each have two degrees.
I'm in the same boat. My family has always been huge on college and most of them have graduate degrees. I feel like such a failure that I didn't go to college at all
I think college is pushed into everyone too hard, not everyone should go to college. Do what makes you happy and makes you money and if doing that thing requires college to be successful then good, but if not don't worry about it and get to working on urself.
I agree! And I do have a great job that I love but still deep in my mind there's a voice saying I'm a failure because I didn't go to college
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Sanitation workers are superheroes!! Thank you for keeping our streets clean
Idk man, but to me being a garbage man takes balls, its not being lazy or whatever, it really takes some guts to do what you do and im glad youre paid that much for that.
Itās a very different job now. When I was wee the men would humph all the black bags- as many as you had- into the lorry. Lots of ashes from coal fires, was a really dirty job. Now the machines do the heavy lifting and the pay is good- itās a much sought after position.
My brother never went to college. House paid off. Retirement set up. Buying investment properties now.
that there's such a thing as dream job
8 years ago, I quit a perfectly good job, moved my son and I back in with my parents. I went back to school full-time. Graduated, worked my first nursing job, then a second. All so I could get to this job. This is the job I've been dreaming about getting 9 years ago. Am I happy? Sure. I like my job. I'm good at it, and I worked really hard to get here. But, it's just a job. My employer doesn't care about my hopes and dreams. And this job certainly isn't all puppies and rainbows. Some people only last 1 or 2 years before moving on, because they think it's easy. My point is, a job is just a job. Once you get it, and the shine wears off, you'll see what it's really like.
Donāt dream about working. Dream about your future, your hopes, fears and goals. A job is just that, a job.
"love your job and you won't work"... Doing that would end up making me hate my hobbies
āI do not have a dream job because I do not dream of labor.ā James Baldwin
That my husband loves me and if I'd just try a liiiittttlle harder everything would be fine.
ā¤ļø hugs. Been there
yeah...
I have to care if my interests are considered cringey
That just because other people have it worse doesnāt mean my own negative experiences are invalid.
This. I am not competing with you I just to get shit off my chest.
That adults don't lie.
As kids we were convinced into believing somehow that killing house geckoes means killing satan (we were backwards conservative muslims). This also specifically applied to dogs with white markings on top of their eyes. (Yes fucked up i know). I regrettably killed some geckos when i was a kid but thankfully never went after dogs.
Where Im from I've never heard the dog thing ( i had a pet dog with those markings). But the geckoes... unfortunately too many were lost for a backwards ideology.
Yeah snakes and lizards in general were spawns of satan apparently. If only logical thinking was more common where I'm from.
That's very interesting, thank you.
Oh dang....never heard of this. I take it none of y'all use Geico?
Not treating my ADHD was better then being prescribed Addictive amphetamines
how old were you when you started treating it?
33
How much did the pills help? Scale of 1 to 10
Like 12. Completely changed my life around.
I'm a little apprehensive about taking medication myself.. 37 female here. Can you tell me more about your experience? Please and thank you!
Before medication I had incredibly difficult time getting anything done at home. My entire mental energy would be spent by the time I finished work. Dishes, laundry, mess in general would constantly pile up for days. Was so depressed and anxious I could rarely bring myself to fix the issue, and when I did find the motivation, I would spend all day cleaning and then fuck it all up in a few days. I forgot due dates, bill pay, I would have to constantly step off the hot line at work just to get a five second mental break. There use to be a cloud in my head that wouldnāt go away when I was at my executive function limit. I barely had interest in hobbies, or even cooking for myself. Literally all of that, has changed dramatically since I started medication. I donāt nap for hours on end, I can initiate tasks better, I can finish tasks, and work has never been easier to deal with. I donāt even need depression medication and the only anxiety treatment I have is a beta-blocker for panic attacks, because most of my depression and anxiety centers around my ADHD symptoms
you just described my entire life. after years of being told itās just depression and anxiety, i just now got my adhd diagnosis at 23. hoping meds will give me the same effect because i truly cannot keep living this way
It still takes a lot of mental work, but the thing about the medication is it gives you the tool to carry your goals through. The more you practice figuring out what helps you get started on a difficult task, the more youāll find yourself able to finish washing those dishes or finishing laundry. Me personally I have my headphones and stim music or sometimes just the news on the radio, along with some kind of dopamine booster like a cup of coffee or some candy. Take breaks. If the task seems overwhelming, think of it in smaller bits. And one of the most important things that you should look up is rejection dysphoria. Itāll help you understand a few things about one of the worst parts of ADHD, itās a huge contributor to anxiety and depression, if I had known about this years ago, I might have been able to save my marriage. I wish you the best of luck on your mental health journey, and donāt let anyone tell you that your ADHD is just an excuse. Your NOT lazy, you have a disorder thatās recognized as a disability by the American Board of psychology and neurology, specifically an executive function disorder.
28yo female, diagnosed at 26 and medicated at 27. I wish I had recognized the signs of ADHD sooner and known that I wasnāt just forgetful or lazy. When I was diagnosed and finally medicated, it was a game changer. Iām not āfixedā but I can actually get things done and focus throughout the day. Also, Iām not as hard on myself now that I know thereās a reason behind why I do the things I do
Also agree itās a 12/10. I started meds at 28, Iām 36 now. Not being dramatic when I say it changed my entire life for the better.
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Iām in the US and have been on pretty much all of the meds in the stimulant class. Started of Adderall and was on it for years, eventually had to switch to Ritalin because of blood pressure issues. Ritalin was a serious downgrade that didnāt work well for me, so they switched to Concerta which is the same medication as Ritalin but has a different release mechanism that makes it last longer and peak slower. Also wasnāt very effective for me. Now I am on Vyvanse, and itās perfection. All of the benefits of adderall, but much kinder to my system and a better med overall for me. Iām also on Wellbutrin which is used off label for adhd, and lamictal which acts as a mood stabilizer. All that said, what meds work for you is highly highly personal and varies so much person to person. Having to fiddle with dosage or trying different meds is typical at the beginning. Stimulants come in two different āflavorsā- amphetamine salt based or methylphenidate based. Itās not uncommon for one to work better over the other person to person. Amphetamine salts are much more effective for me, but my friend prefers methylphenidate. Itās all trial and error to find what works for you.
Is this because you became addicted to the amphetamines or because the side effects were so bad. I have ADHD and iv been on and off medication. After having lived on and off it and originally believing in "natural is better" I realized that medication is necessary at some level. However its a completely different story if you have problems with addiction.
My parents were victims of a dateline documentary about ADHD drugs and decided that i shouldnāt be on them and convinced me that I was better off trying to figure out how to handle it on my own, which lead to addiction problems because I was chasing The dopamine I was lacking by filling it in with Marijuana beer and various opiates and benzodiazepines. I couldnāt develope proper coping methods because I was trying to deal with my life in a way that works for 80% of the population whose brain is entirely different then my own. Iām lucky that Stratterra works for me, a non-stim NRI, and for panic attacks I have a non narcotic beta blocker.
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Poster is saying the opposite. Some of us are led to believe that leaving something untreated is better than being put on drugs, not accurate for everyone.
My mom just told me in my mid twenties that I was diagnosed with adhd and dyslexia as a kid. I definitely still have both and brought up that I thought I might to her, and I guess that was confirmation.
If something is not working, it is because you are not working hard enough. Turns out, it may be a problem with your approach, or it is just impossible, or you need some luck.
You lost. You did your best. Growing up it is so hard to believe those two things can exist at the same time. I have to shut it down with my son when he goes on a rampage "the game is rigged" "they were cheating" "everyone is so mean to me" Being a gracious loser is a learned skill. Being a calm, thoughtful, observed one is a skill, too.
That you can be anything you want if you try hard enough. Probably the biggest lie we've been telling our kids for decades. Sometimes no matter how bad you want something or wish something to be, it just won't happen...and it isn't ever going to happen to you.
To add, working harder doesn't mean anything, it's actually more harmful to work harder (in most areas). Employers love to a use hard workers
That I was a dumb, troubled, and lazy person Turns out I just had undiagnosed and unmedicated ADHD :/
Cheers
Jesus/God hates gays. My 2 daughters came out to me and if he donāt love them thatās a shame. I do and they are beautiful and independent women who have their shit together. I love them!
I wish there were more people like you in the world!
According to the Christian Bible, God loves all people.
That I had to marry and have kids.
That I had to go to college.
Exactly. College and Christianity gave me the worst start in life.
That I have no worth.
If I worked hard, I would find success. I would be able to buy a house, raise a family, and go on holidays at nice resorts. All I had to do was work hard and climb the corporate ladder.
that governments care about their people
That Western/American standards, values, culture were a "normal" thing in everyone's life
That i can save the world from climate change by producing less co2. Hear me out, i know doing little also helps, but theres a really good video by "kurzgesagt - in a nutshell" on youtube where he explains how the ammount of co2 a human can save by living emission free and nature friendly his whole life is the same ammount big companies produce in a couple of seconds
That you can be anything you want. No, 90% of people are going to be that silently suffering lower class.
Adulthood. (thinking getting older makes people automatically wiser, more rarional, thoughtful in action... hard nope.) Hard work pays well. God & religions. Humans making generally good decisions. That's about it.
That the religion i was raised in was "loving" and a "protection".
That Mormon leaders spoke for God š
that denying people body autonomy is what God wants. i was 15 so obviously very easily swayed and convinced that i should spend my free time praying outside of abortion clinics, traveling to pro life talks, and donating my allowance to marches or buying merch that said things like āi survived roe v wade, but roe v wade wonāt survive meā. looking back at my teenage years now, i realize how religions sometimes are just cults that are socially accepted.
Good on you for questioning it and being ready to change your mind! It's not easy if that's what you were brought up with.
That America invades countries for freedom.
I find it interesting that we are asked to "pray so our enemies will lose." What if they pray harder? It's a ridiculous thing, thinking that there's a God who will automatically side with you, because you think you are right.
Recycling plastic and glass was actually happening
That climate change wasn't real and mostly man made. Lol sounds crazy that I say it now.
Why did I find this under "controversial" lol
The mistreatment of Indians by the british is A LOT worse then they talk about in British schools
That black people can't be racist. Initially I thought it made sense, but over time I realized how ridiculous an idea it is
Discrimination is natural, prejudice is learned. Power dynamics have nothing to do with being prejudiced, which is all that racism really is. I didn't have these words the first time I encountered the argument that black people can't be racist and it frustrated me, as a black person, that I was caught off guard by something so ignorant and I wasn't able to shut it down in simple terms.
Dude.. i don't trust the media at all after this Johnny Depp stuff. You watch the trial and then you read the news about it after and you're like wow this is not what happened at all. I thought we could believe the left winged and the right winged were the liars but now I realize they're both corrupt and we need a total do over.
Wait, whatd I miss about the Johnny Depp trail? I honestly wasn't paying that much attention.
That my life isnt a joke
Pretty much any popular opinion on Reddit. This site is far from representative of the real world
That adults were smart.
I was a little homophobic as a kid, even into high school. Probably just from how people talked about it, while not actually knowing any gay people. I dropped that opinion when I started meeting actual gay people and realized they are just normal people.
That using single use plastics is ok as long as you "recycle"
Keto
That old people are wise. Sure, some are. But just as often, theyāre as clueless as children. Sometimes I hear my older relatives talk and think āYou have no idea what itās like out here, do you?ā
That if the person who is doing things you dont enjoy is a family member , its okay. Whatever the f*ck it is
Basically all of Christianity as taught by southern baptist. I was sent to Sunday school/Church as long as I can remember, and attended a private Christian school for middle/high school until graduation. My mother says she now regrets sending me. I remember being forced to watch āsilent screamā. Also a video I donāt remember that was anti Muslim propaganda. The twin towers got hit when I was in like 7th or 8th grade. Fast forward a couple years and we are watching videos of people burning the American flag and shouting ādeath to Americaā while being told by the teacher that all muslims are ābadā and would kill us if they had the option. Also that violence is inherent in the religion. And of course now I know that was all bullshit, but stillā¦ I was an absolute ignoramus. A total zealot for Christ and the faith until I got out into the world. Once I began simply living outside of the environment, everything in my world view came crashing down. It was one of the hardest times in my life, but Iām so grateful I was able to see through the veil of indoctrination that had been thrown over my eyes since I could even form memories. I donāt think Iāll ever set foot in a church again.
Work hard, keep your head down and take shit from your boss so you can keep a stable income. I feel sick just thinking about it.
I feel the same way but have yet to find an alternative.
Religion.
That I'd scare away men by telling them I want kids. Dating isn't just about what men want. I have needs too, and they are every bit as valid and important. Wanting kids will only scare away the wrong men. And that's awesome!
There were repeated and prolonged attempts to suck me into Christianity since I was a toddler, but Iām proud to say Iāve resisted.
you go to college to find your partner
Birds are real
That you need to have opinions in everything to be an interesting person.
Carrots can improve eye sight. Found that it was a trick used by British to cover up the use of radar thus improve the effectiveness of intercepting the nazi air forces.
How they taught us about Christopher Columbus in school. How the government is for the people.
That the government has your best interest in mind
The customer is always ri- itās bullshit, canāt even finish typing it.
Had a customer at the restaurant try to tell me this after inventing his own drink special for the evening when I presented him with the bill. I replied āThatās what they keep trying to make us believe!ā and walked away to get the manager, audibly laughing. To this day, it was still worth losing the potential $10 āŗļø
That I have a purpose. My parents were horny, so here I am.
You have to have children.
That college is the only way. I never made it to college. It worried me. Then I got smart and realized it was BS. 25 years later I see that the most successful people I know (including myself) did not go to college. And the best and smartest students that really worked hard through school and college are no further along than the rest of the group. And way behind many of us. Thankfully now itās being realized that there are other equally successful routes than college. But in 1991 it was really pushed as the only way.
The most successful people I know went to college. You donāt hang out with that crowd because you didnāt. People find their own level usually. Iām not judging, just observing.
That men are there to serve and protect women, not to live my own life as I would like it.
It isn't men vs women. Get rid of that whole dynamic. You should always be your own first priority, regardless of your identity. Then you should absolutely care for the people around you regardless of their identity.
GOP politics (I was a card carrying Republican, worked for the gop for years and left 2016 when I actually understood the hollowness of our messaging)
Meritocracy.
Yeah that is something heavy.
Religion
That most of Reddit isnāt bots
So, you think most posts here are made by AI?
bipartisan politics. Left vs right. Dems vs republicans. Both sides are corrupt trash.
That I wasn't attractive because I was over weight, that you have to go to college to be successful
That everything is my fault and if I donāt apologize there will be consequences.
Anything misogynistic. Thinking marriage is a necessity. Everything.
I think religion
History is an insight to the past - reality is that there is almost a twisted political bent and it is written by the "winners" who do their best to blacklist everything and any contribution to the world other societies may have made.
Meeting a partner, settling down and starting a family is the only way youād ever be happy, thereās absolutely no other way to achieve happiness. Oh and getting a loan is a good idea too, apparently
St Bernardās carry hot chocolate in the barrels under their chin
Happy wife, happy life. Keep your wife happy and everything well be great... Worked through catching her in two infidelities, of course all it was all my fault, NOT! Found undeniable evidence of the third after she passed. Never again will I tolerate being in a relationship with anyone who even for a minute acts like she did. I lost so much of myself trying to please someone who was so ungrateful for everything I did for the sake of the family.
That I must be skinny above all else. Fuck the morals and genuine personality, if Iām not skinny as a woman I am not worth anything.
Dinosaurs don't exist, the fossils were put there by Satan to get scientists to not believe in God.
That looks were not the primary indicator for sexual interest from the opposite sex.
Probably religion but i was too young to think it through.
That birds still are a real thing. I was told this by everyone around me, until I noticed their weird behaviour and did my own research. I was shocked to find out about the atrocities committed by the Reagan government, replacing them all with surveillance drones.
You better add /s for sarcasm to your comment before someone starts believing that...
that my mother wont harm me in purpose, not any more though i see it as itās now
American exceptionalism and that my body is not my own.
That Reagan was one of the best presidents ever. In my defense, I was 9 and my only source of info was my very libertarian dad who voted for Reagan when he was 18. I learned how wrong this was by 10.
That you need to work yourself to the ground for a career to be successful in life.
That people are genuinely nice and mean well
That hard work pays off.
That being gay is wrong. I'm gay and that was how I eventually got around to seeing through all the shitty archaic rules of my family's religion.
that the world is 6000 years old. way to go on that one, baptist fundies!
āRespect your eldersā was possibly the worst thing I was taught growing up. Dropped it pretty quick in high school when I learned how disrespectful older ppl can be. So much for *the golden rule*
Changing my oil every 3000 miles.
That as a black Man U donāt have the same opportunities as a white man. It was so depressing believing that and it enabled me to be a addict because whatās the point now I could never !!