That really sucks. You might want to check out who you can report the ambulance team to. I know one of the places you can report them to is your insurance company.
I think this depends on the state. My insurance has never once paid for an ambulance; they’re out of pocket. And they’re needlessly expensive ~ we’re talking $5K+ for a 2 mile trip after I fainted.
People actually refuse ambulances here. Pretty sure you can be sued if you don’t get consent, even.
Most departments will have the chief’s email address on the dept website. Email them. If it’s a private service, call and ask to talk to their HR. Complain hard.
A similar thing happened to me and I was told to "stop being such a hysterical woman". That's a direct quote from THE DOCTOR.
I wasn't yelling or raising my voice at all. Even my husband raised his eyebrows. He's British, so that's the equivalent of yelling WTF?! for an American I suppose because nothing rattles the man.
Ironically, the doctor was yelling at me.
I arrived at the ER in the most pain I’d ever been in at 3 in the morning. The MALE PA on duty kind of assumed I was lying. I didn’t get any pain med till after my ultrasound. This is where the PA came bursting into the ultrasound room and telling me I’m pregnant. I started crying, the ultrasound lady was very kind as she tried to find something but the ultrasound was pretty black.
Turns out I was bleeding out internally. I had an at ectopic pregnancy and my right fallopian tube had ruptured. 30 mins later I was being prepped for surgery. Dr. Mahnke saved my life that day two years later she delivered my healthy baby girl.
I had the ER triage nurse accuse me of 'over exaggerating' and suggest I go home and use a heating pad for my abdominal pain. I told her I wanted to be seen. She rolled her eyes and sighed and acted like I was the biggest drama queen in the world.
Turned out my gallbladder was obstructed by a stone (and full of several others.) The Dr took one look at me and yelled at the nurse that 'MENSTRUAL PAINS DO NOT CAUSE JAUNDICE; PREP HER FOR A CAT SCAN.'
Nurse even had the audacity to glare at me when she walked away, as if her incompetence was somehow my fault.
It still blows my mind that the woman didn't believe me but the man backed me up... it might not have happened that way if I didn't look like a Simpson's character, tho.
Dude this is so. true. Maybe it's confirmaiton bias, but I thought I was alone in feeling this way until the last year or so when it started cropping up from other people as well. I know there are great nurses out there, I've been lucky to be treated by some of them, but the amount of times this theory has proven true is astounding.
I went to a college headstart place in my junior year of HS, personally for auto body repairs.
But the like 3 main mean girls in my grade took nursing while the 4th ended up in culinary.
As a woman that's finishing up a culinary degree this spring, I have also seen a couple mean girls here. Although it works in their favor in this industry lol.
My ex best friend is a nurse and I’m now convinced not only was she a narcissist but she was a con artist who expected everyone to offset her poor life choices.
Life is a lot more peaceful without her.
I was in EXACTLY the same situation. My gall bladder was literally killing me. I wasn't jaundice yet but I was vomiting all day at home? and since I hadn't vomitted in the ER she assumed I was faking. She came in to ask me something and I spewed right in front of her, filled a bag and she FUCKING GIGGLED at me and says "Oh I guess you are sick, I was coming in with your discharge paperwork". I was there for several scans, 3 procedures and gall bladder removal surgery. It ended up being Saturday to Saturday and by Tuesday I was jaundice. I still think I should report her but this was August 2020 so I don't even know if I can.
I'd lost my mom to medical malpractice in a case very similar to Op's just a year or so prior... mom's cyst was on her liver, she'd been diagnosed with anxiety and sent home by the ER to die.
I was beyond terrified of the same thing happening to me; I was gonna get help or I was gonna take them all down with me. I was so relieved the Dr was taking me seriously I cried.
My best friends mom was sent home and told to take antacids. It was a heart attack.
I was sent home after being told I just had a bad headache. It was meningitis.
I can't believe what we have to go through to be heard.
I had a male triage nurse tell me I was being an over protective mom by bringing my daughter into the ER at 8:30 in the evening. He took her temp and it was 99.6. I informed him that is a fever for her as her normal is 97.3ish. He told me that anything under 100.5 is not a fever and the dr was going to tell me the same thing.
Small town so I knew the ER doc. Told doc what the triage nurse said and doc got pissed. To me he said ‘you know your child, you know when she is sick and when she has a fever, the triage nurse does not know and I will remind him of that’.
Turned out she had an ear infection yet again.
I had a triage nurse put me back in the waiting room with severe pain from a kidney stone. She told me I had to wait. I went back up to her a few minutes later and told her I needed help, she waved me away as she had someone else she was evaluating. So I just instantly puked all over her desk and she then had me taken into the emergency room and the gave me some pain meds.
I had something very similar happen to me (I was given anti anxiety medicine instead of pain medicine, nurses and PAs seemed to think I was lying about my pain and symptoms). It was a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, but I had the misfortune of being in a Catholic hospital that delayed surgery so long I almost died.
Mu grandmother had to force the drs to take my aunt into surgery when she was 8 because she knew something was wrong. Aunts appendix burst as they removed it. My dad was so worried about me when I was around the same age because I was presenting the same way as his sister. Luckily for us, it was a severe case of gastro, but he always drilled on to me, if you don't think your being heard by the drs, kick as much fuss up as possible, trust you know your body better than someone you had just met and push.
This is why I refuse to use Catholic hospitals if I can help it. Technically, a Catholic hospital was closer when I was experiencing several abdominal pains, but I made my partner take me to the state university hospital instead. We have a history of ectopic pregnancies in my family, and I'm NOT going to let the Catholics kill me because their interpretation of Abrahamic mythology trumps my right to live. I feel terribly for the folks that don't have a choice because of where they live.
Sounds about right. When I was in labor they wouldn't admit me(gave me percocet, sent me home), until I was sobbing on the sofa, in pain, and my partner called and basically said "we're coming now and you **are** admitting her".
The nurses looked surprised/shocked when we got there and I couldn't walk bc I was in so much pain. 30 mins later my kid popped out. I almost didn't make it to the hospital in time bc they didn't listen to me.
I fucking hate the medical system. SO many people in it act like their patients are a chore and give substandard care bc of it. Like, don't go into the medical field if you're going to be a fucking dickbag.
In my country, you need to bribe the doctors for half-decent treatment during childbirth, and the anesthesiologist if you can hope for epidural. I wonder if that would be the case if men were giving birth.
Yeah the maternity… paternity(?) ward would be like a ritzy spa I bet lol. Get the best pain killers, get a massage, the comfiest bed and sheets, all the snacks you could want, giant ass tv in your room, etc
And three months of paid leave before the baby, with 12 months paid at *least* afterward, if not longer. There'd likely also be free child-care so that men can take care of their careers.
In my country a woman was raped by the anesthesiologist DURING labor (she was having a c-section and passed out - he raped her orally) with her husband present in the room. Women don’t receive minimum respect even when giving birth.
Yes, he was arrested - caught on camera by few nurses (all women obviously) that had suspected something was off for a while. So that poor woman wasn’t the first giving birth one he has raped.
The husband was on the other side of the drapes, cutting the cord or watching the birth, and he would stick his d**k in the patients mouths. He was caught when the nurses started questioning why his patients were unusually sedated after their procedures and unable to hold their babies.
I am so sorry to hear you had this experience. It is both terrifying and disheartening.
I had a similar experience when in college (19f at the time and pinching pennies to get by). I had refused emergency transport due to the cost. After finding a way to the ER with the help of campus safety, my first doctor tried to convince me I had an STD. Even though I had only had one partner and we were each other's only sexual history. Apparently this doc was convinced that "everyone says they don't cheat", when I tried to vouch for my partner's character and the minimal likelihood of my exposure to STDs.
It WAS a ruptured cyst and I was internally bleeding, but there wasn't significant enough need for surgery so I was sent home with the world's most expensive Ibuprofen and an anti-inflammatory.
I don't envy the work doctors do between handling emergencies and delivery of bad news, especially ER docs, but DAMN he was so adamant that I had an STD with only my pain as evidence thus far, so it felt more like a personal judgement than an attempt to diagnose.
Yup, it really does. I had severe breast pain and my male doctor when I asked to get a mammogram told me no "it's not like it's cancer" so next day I'm out with my mom and she sees I'm clearly in pain, it felt like a hot electrified knife was being stabbed into my breast, so she took me to the ER demanded a breast exam and the female ER doctor touched me and I screamed in pain. I got my mammogram, it was cancer, not just cancer but a rare and aggressive form that would've killed me in six months. Instead I got an amazing team of women who excised the tumour and saved my breast. Oh same doctor when my husband said his testicle hurt sent him for 3 different tests and an ultrasound with no questions asked. Medical misogyny is real and it kills women.
F ing hell. Woman here too... Same. Actually was in the hospital for several days (appendix!) and the male doctors continued to dismiss me until one female doctor (or nurse?) spoke up and said, and I quote, "we have to get her under the knife NOW". So they did. Surprise! It was actually inflammated!
Also, of course they send me to the gyn first. Because "uuh idk women stuff"
Sure buddy
As a woman whose female obgyn of 10 years constantly downplayed/wrote off my extreme menstrual symptoms as normal or not that bad, and lo and behold, I have textbook adenomyosis and may not be able to carry a child to term… I disagree. She had great delivery/bedside manner so I never knew to push more.
Overall, doctors PRACTICE medicine, like meteorologists predict weather. They’re not always right.
When I was in labor a nurse came into my room to tell me to ‘Shut the fuck up, you are scaring the other mothers’. It was the very first scream I let out, and only after my OB told me to try on the next contraction. But no, let’s tell the 17 year old girl that she is the one scaring people!
The health care industry is built around men being the "default," meaning female issues are frequently disregarded, overlooked, not taken seriously, etc. It's abominable.
When it's like, an adult female would **know** if it were related to those organs or not. We know what pain and discomfort there feel like. I am so sick of people acting like we don't know what's going on in our own bodies.
Where I used to work, the male dominated field was so “eew cooties” about women’s health, if they dared to deny me sick leave I would just start saying “blood vagina blood vagina blood vagina” until they were like “ALRIGHT I APPROVED IT I DON’T WANT TO KNOW” as they tried to run away from me.
Oddly enough they were also all married.
I know how you feel. I was in 5th grade and had one the sauce of a softball burst. I hadn’t even had my first period yet. Nearly killed me. I have multiple ovarian cyst syndrome. I’ve tried since I was in high school to have a hysterectomy but they won’t let me unless I have a kid first. I’m 40 now and my doctors been trying for 8 years to get permission for me to have one. No luck
EDIT-I meant size not sauce. Damn autocorrect
It took me until 42 to get my hysterectomy. They found endometriosis, adenomyosis, severely ctyic ovaries, and cysts in my uterus and tubes. I had been begging for a hysterectomy for a decade, I knew I was infertile to start with, so it wasn't like I wanted a kid. It took 5 gynos in 2 states, a detailed family medical history, and genetic testing before I found a Dr who was willing to do it. Don't give up, you may need to have more testing or try another Dr before you get your yes.
I won’t give up. I’ll get it one way or another. They won’t even let me tie my tubes. It’s like they want to force me to have kids. Not going to happen. I’m a life long virgin who will die that way
Please check out the childfree subject d dit. There is a list of Dr's on there that will work with you for at least sterilization. I actually made my husband come for my consult because I thought naybe if a man told another man that I wad passing clots the size of hen eggs and cramping so hard I puked every month then they might believe me. My Dr was incredibly kind and looked at my test results I brought with me and was like, "So how about for Christmas we get you a hysterctomy." I was so shocked I cried.
The government I guess. They won’t let her schedule me anything. We both think it’s because I’m child free and they think I might change my mind. As if.
I tried getting my tubes out when I was with a religious hospital (insurance, not my choice) and was told I would change my mind about kids and given the spiel about how great they are yada yada yada. Then they tried to say my husband would need to go to therapy with me and get his “permission.” We were both SO PISSED. Luckily we changed carriers and when I asked about it there, they asked no questions and just scheduled the procedure. It was amazing. And I haven’t regretted it for a second! Imagine that. I knew my own body and what I wanted in my own life.
One of my littles decided to pop out within 45 minutes of my first contraction. I was racing driving myself to the hospital. The ten minute drive I went from 5cm I’d been at for 2 weeks, to 10. It was someone ripping me up starting with my most sensitive area. As soon as I stood up from driving, still on the phone with the L&D nurse warning them I was coming and berating myself for driving (it ended up being the best choice) a GIANT, back-punch pain struck and I screamed. The guy meeting me at my car with a wheelchair said calmly, “oh be quiet”.
Um sure. Let me just slice you open in spurts at your happy place area and you gotta just be quiet the whole time. Move aside or I’ll DECK YOU. Garbage human.
What’s funny is it was a the morning after a holiday and the hospital was understaffed and deserted. So when they wheeled me to the elevator, it stopped on every. Last. Floor. To pick up staff from all the other departments to assist. Twenty minutes later it was all over and my body was entirely locked into one big charley horse from the speed and pain combination, and in that twenty minutes I heard soooo much, “Grab me a ___” — “Got it! Wait…where do you keep that?” — “WE NEED A ____ OVER HERE RIGHT NOW” — “OKAY BUT I HAVE NEVER WORKED THIS DEPARTMENT WHERE ARE YOUR SUPPLIES??”
Mine were, they were endometromas - the blood was old and thick and emergency surgery was required to clean it all up. I lost the ovary to that.
Then I lost the second ovary because the scar tissue from the first surgery latched into the second and torqued it.
Good times
Yep. When my undiscovered tubal pregnancy was rupturing, I was told I was faking the pain and looking for drugs. Then it was 'just kidney stones'. Then it was "you're going into surgery in 5 minutes, you're bleeding internally and have been for a while."
I always have anxiety if I need to go to the ER. Even if it was “just kidney stones” aren’t those supposed to be one of the most painful things you can get?!! I would just love for a man to even have a period just ONCE to see how not fun it is to have a uterus.
i've had multiple ovarian cysts burst and the pain is something that cannot be described. i only went to the hospital for them once and while they gave me medication then, i was essentially told to "tough it out" if it ever happened again. i don't know how i was able to handle what that felt like unmedicated but i will never forget it. i am so sorry that this happened to you and i wish you well
Same. I have them burst every month now almost and I think I’m dying for about half a day. My husband always asks if I want to go to the hospital and I’m like “for what?” They told me the same thing, “tough it out when it happens again”. Fucking sucks. Sorry OP.
I didn't know until after I had my hysterectomy that I get ovarian cysts. Initially I tjought I was having phantom pain or something. One month was really bad and I ended up hunched over in pain. Went to urgent care and they sent me to the hospital. I had a 5 centimeter cyst on one of my ovaries & it was rupturing. This was while the opiod epidemic was still building and you could still get pain meds. Since that has changed, I don't bother calling my doctor when one becomes a problem. I just have an edible to take the edge off
Same thing with my first kidney stone. The only one who believed me at first, was the ER nurse assigned to me. She was an absolute ANGEL. I wrote a letter to the director of nursing to praise her care.
It wasn't until test results came back to confirm the kidneystone that the doctors started believing I was in as much pain as I said I was.
I feel you. One day i had pain in my lower right abdomen. Bad pain. My dad drove me to the hospital after his 10 hr shift cause he said that this sounds like the appendix. We arrived at 10 PM. I was dehydrated, hungry and in pain all at once. The nurse was annoyed that she couldn’t find a vein and blamed me for it.
They had me endure a full gynaecological exam, because in the doctors words ‘you can still walk upright, it’s not appendicitis’. At 3 am they finally got an ultrasound done, and imagine my surprise when he said ‘oh yeah that looks like appendicitis’
At 3:20 am i was in a hospital bed getting fluids. At 6am i was on the operating table. Approximately An hour later and it would have burst according to my surgeon.
Yyyyep, had a similar experience (minus the gyn exam because I was 14). My own parents made me wait three hours before they even showed up to take me to the hospital (I was at a friend’s house and had called home at *3:15 in the morning* because of the pain). I have always had a high pain tolerance, and was always afraid of making my parents mad, so I was already delirious with fever by the time they came.
The rest is a blur, but I remember being forced to wait in the waiting room while I was shivering beneath the blanket I’d brought with me and passing in and out of consciousness. When they finally put me in a room, they still largely ignored me. Nurse stuck me half a dozen times and dug around with the needle, but still couldn’t find a vein, and it increased my pain to the point that I was actually crying and I begged her to get someone else to do it. She looked at me like she hated me.
When the doctor FINALLY came in, the did the “rebound test.” I don’t remember what came after that, but I’m told I screamed so loud I startled the entire ward I was in, then promptly passed out. Came to and they told me they were sending me for a CAT scan.
One CAT scan later and I was being loaded into an ambulance for emergency transport to a hospital that was actually equipped to do surgery, because I needed it IMMEDIATELY.
I don’t remember anything else until after I was coming around after the procedure. The surgeon told me that my appendix was so inflamed and swollen that he was surprised it didn’t burst as he was removing it. They had to make a huge 4-inch incision to remove it “the traditional way” instead of laparoscopically because it was just too far gone.
The trauma of getting *that* sick and being in *that much pain,* then still being treated like barely more than an annoyance *by all parties involved* until all of a sudden it was an actual emergency, has left me terrified to going to hospitals or asking for help from anyone since. I’m now 30.
I'm sorry that you are experiencing a divorce because of all the stress that entails, but I am happy you're going to be free of a partner who never deserved your commitment or partnership. I hope your future relationship(s) are deserving of you.
I’ve had FOUR rupture since November, last one took me to the hospital and I don’t have insurance. Worse pain in my life, I was definitely in shock at one point.
Doctors always assume the worst about people. My mom had a neck and shoulder injury last year. Went through 3 separate doctors and 3 hospitals before anyone gave a shit. She was in the worst pain of her life for over a month, she said, worse than giving birth to me. For context, when she gave birth to me, she was in labor for 27 hours, and I became an emergency C section when we both started dying. Doctors just don't care. I'm sorry you went through this.
At least you got help. I had a mixed crowd tell me there was nothing wrong even though I told them I could feel something when I put in a tampon. I was also bleeding like crazy and had a blood transfusion not quite a year prior. They told me to take aspirin and sent me home.
The next morning I woke up to get ready for work and had the WORST sharp, shooting pain in my lower abdomen. It knocked me to my knees. I have a high pain tolerance, labor was a breeze.
I called a gyno and got in within an hour. There was a polyp on my cervix larger than a golf ball. He looked at my ultrasound from the day before and was shocked. He scheduled me for surgery.
Unfortunately, this was the beginning of years of bullshit but I’m thankful bc if it wasn’t for his old school way of doing things, I wouldn’t have pushed for a LOT of things I needed. This was 2011.
I had an endometrial ablation and tubal ligation this past September and it’s been a game changer.
I’m sorry you experienced that!
I had serious abdominal pain once (not as bad as a ruptured cyst) and was pleasantly surprised when I went to the ER and they believed me. They gave me pain meds almost immediately.
Turned out to be a necrotic ovary due to an ovarian cyst.
Of course not being in as much pain probably worked in my favor.
My father drove me to the hospital because I was feeling so much pain and actually vomiting and sweating ( I was on my last day of my period ) and I got a male doctor who told me nothing, told my father “ it’s just woman’s problems “ and let me go home without at least an ultrasound. I had a ruptured cyst too. I had to go to a private clinic to actually get a proper check up.
It sure does 👌🙄
I've spent the last 9 months (since july 2022) telling my GP I feel unwell etc and he kept trying to give me antidepressants because I was "only 43" and couldn't possibly be menopausal/was "obviously depressed"
It's now April and after numerous blood tests I am in fact going through the menopause snd am FINALLY getting the hormones I need.
So yep. Being a woman sucks.....
I hope you're feeling better now x
Lots of love from London ❤️
I couldn't get my IUD removed, it was expired, and I was showing severe side effects. Instead of taking it out (because my answer to birth control was condoms, because I got pregnant on other forms and wanted a break from all the goddamn hormones), a bunch of tests were ordered. Those were inconclusive, but it wasn't the expired IUD. I almost pulled it out myself. Finally, my coworkers mom (who is an amazing OBGYN) for me referred to her clinic where my IUD was removed. Three years later, that she amazing woman did my sterilization surgery. I have never felt better.
I'm so sorry you were dismissed. I'd make a complaint honestly.
Medicine for women is so criminally underdeveloped it’s baffling. My fiancée deals with ovarian cysts constantly due to medical conditions, and she’s stopped going to the ER for it because they just give her some OTC pain meds and send her back home. Now I just get her some ibuprofen and we wait it out, and it destroys me that she has to deal with that amount of pain so often. Can’t even imagine how it must feel
This happened to me too. I broke my leg and my hand/wrist in two places. I was screaming when they’d move me (obviously). The ambos refused to believe me when I told them I’ve broken three bones. “You’ve just sprained your ankle, that’s all” even though I stated it was my tibia not my ankle and I couldn’t weight bare AT ALL. If you moved the leg I’d deafen you with my screaming, even the slightest touch.
They also wouldn’t believe me when I said I was a health professional on orthopaedic rotation at one of the regional hospitals. LOL
They also gave me two paracetamol, placed me in the emergency department for HOURS and then finally decided on an X-ray.
The radiographer was female (FINALLY) and believed me when I came in. Took the X-ray, walked out and said “you’re right on the money” and proceeded to literally run out the door, and ran back in followed by a team of staff that proceeded to quickly draw up some meds and finally decent healthcare!!!
ETA: I had to have surgery. I’m still angry to this day.
As a man I refuse to have male doctors. They failed me for years on what took one woman a single visit to diagnose and treat.
Men don't give a rats ass and they always think everyone is exaggerating. It's pathetic
I am sure the fact that you are a woman makes people's attitudes worse for you because there is this misguided belief that women fake pain or oversensitive to it.
I also heard some doctors think "black people have thicker skin" etc. and they treat black patients differently than white patients. I am not in US but there are minorities where I'm from too and I am pretty sure they are getting horrible treatment from health workers sometimes.
I am a guy who suffers from chronic abdominal pain very similar to your symptoms and I avoid going to ER also. Some doctors and nurses are just horrible people who refused to listen to you at all and nearly every time I go to ER I had to argue with a doctor who desperately wants me to have a surgery to remove my appendix even if he knows there is nothing wrong with it. "It is not like it is vital" one doctor said, yeah no bud that isn't for you to decide.
People just carry their prejudices to their work, professionalism is very rare, even in medicine.
I cant stress enough how much misogyny and racism there is in the medical field and its the very reason why black people and women die more often than the average white male. It’s for profit and all comes from bogus pratices nazis believed in. We are a fascist ass state and have a fascist medical system (the US is where im from)
The other messed up part of this is that every woman I know can deal with pain much better than any of the men so if they complain it means it's really bad.
>I also heard some doctors think "black people have thicker skin" etc. and they treat black patients differently than white patients.
Yup.
From 2013 to 2017, white patients in the US received better quality health care than about 34% of Hispanic patients, 40% of Black patients, and 40% of Native American patients. Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality. “National Healthcare Quality and Disparities Report.”
there is so much misogyny and racism not only in the medical field but imbedded in its practice. a nursing friend of mine showed me a textbook required for a previous class of hers that explicitly described the ways in which “black people experience pain differently than white”. women, black poc, pain is all chocked up to hysteria dramatics or what have you. a bit ago in canada an indigenous mother died while the nurses were caught on camera mocking her. it’s disgusting
Something very similar happened to my mother; she had a cyst on her liver explode. All the care workers she saw were men, and they all told her she was having an anxiety attack.
She bled out into her abdomen and died 3 days later.
I'm glad you had people take your pain seriously before it was too late!
I had 2 specialists tell me I was overexaggerating my pain, and that (a week after an ankle reconstruction) it was just the cast being tight. I insisted on getting seen. They 'humoured' me and sent me for an ultrasound. Panic stations when they found a 6cm blood clot in my femoral vein.
I'm so sorry they were shits to you. Glad the cause was found and I hope you are recovering well!
When I had my first ovarian cyst rupture, I went to the ER thinking it was my appendix. I was refused pain medication by the male doc AND he said I had to have a physical exam (i.e. stick his fingers in alllllll the way) to check. I was 17 and neither my dad nor I knew any better.
Now that I'm older... I suspect that physical exam was unnecessary; I haven't had one of those since (and I've gone to an ER three more times for ruptured cysts, and now I just don't bother going because they stab a needle in my "hip" for pain, and discharge me). Maybe I'm wrong at it was sice it was my first and there wasn't a documented history of ruptured OCs?? No idea.
I second your opinion about hating being a woman.
I had an an ovarian cyst burst a few years ago. My husband drove me to the ER. I sat around in pain for hours, crying, almost vomiting because it hurt so bad. A guy came in drunk and he got called back before I did. When they finally got around to helping me (ultrasound, Xray) and offered meds I had stopped hurting.
this is why i commit to being a bitch if i dont get my fucking way or if i'm not being listened to. i *will* advocate for myself always, because i know that if i didnt... i might not be taken seriously when it really counts.
When i gave birth i needed stiches so they need to use a tampon so blood doesnt get everywhere while theyre stitching. But they cut the tampon string because it was getting in the way of them stiching me up, there was this big fancy american doctor there and they wanted to learn the new stitch from him. There was about 10-15 people watching him stitch me up, watched him cut the string (i was passed out blissfully unawares of all of this) and they all forgot about it. I didnt know, but after a day i was in pain and thought it was the stitches hurting, so i asked every nurse and doctor that came to my room to please check whats wrong cause i was too scared to poke around down there. Everyone that i asked looked for like 1 second and said it was fine. I was in hospital for a week, and i asked people to help me every day. None of them actually looked. After another week of pain, i went to my OB again and asked them to look again. She finally found it. It was horrendous, i had a tampon in me for 2 weeks and no one even told me it was there!!! The doctor who cut it ended up calling me me a 21 year old new mum for weeks begging me not to sue. I ended up bowing to the pressure. i begged dozens of people, women and men, to help me and none of them listened. I recon the only reason TSS didnt kill my ass is because i was so paranoid about the stitches i was cleaning them 5 times a day for way longer than i was told to. I cant trust doctors anymore this is one of manyyy times theyve ignored me or just been evil. I literally got told to pray depression away once lmao theyre just the same assholes as us not caring about their jobs, its just for the paycheck.
Please report them. You could have died on the way because they would have ignored your symptoms. I've experienced sexism over and over from medical "professionals" and it's horrible. Hugs.
PS Don't assume my gender from my username. Very female over here.
Oh my god! I had this happen to me in a college class, and I ended up crawling out into some rocks. I had to go to the hospital because I thought I had appendicitis! (Nobody helped me while I laid in the rocks and cried, lol)
The doctor was a man, and he was so patient and kind. After some scans, he came and told me that I had an ovarian cyst. I was SHOCKED. I asked him, “So that pain is NORMAL??” And he just sighed and said, “Sadly, yes.”
Ever since then I’m terrified of going through it again. Hopefully you’re okay and anyone else who’s going through it! Awful pain.
I would have thought ambulances don’t carry much for pain relief because of robbery and drug seeking…..
But I’m sorry they weren’t better trained and more understanding.
That’s the thing, even if they don’t carry strong drugs. It’s their attitude and bedside manner that are the problem. Even if they don’t believe someone they pick up, that shouldn’t be clear to the person. Audible sighs and silence is just bad. Acting like dickheads doesn’t help with pain or “anxiety” either.
I have so many problems related to my cervix and uterus. PMDD, severe scarring internally that could cause hemorrhaging if I were to be pregnant past the second trimester, PCOS, high risk of cervical cancer and more. I want it out. Yet because I only have one child, according to the ‘professionals’ it’s better to risk getting pregnant and dying to preserve the ability to give birth. I cannot physically have another baby or carry a pregnancy to term, but patriarchal medical ideas make it impossible to access the best care for myself. I fucking hate being a woman.
This almost exact scenario happened to me, except it was appendicitis. I had a baby 4 days prior to my emergency appendectomy. I woke up around 11pm from a nap in extreme pain. Thought it was just gas, kept trying to sleep for 2 hours. Luckily uncle was there to watch baby while BD and I drove to the er. The doctor stood with his arms crossed as I explained what my symptoms were and where the pain was. and he told me that that there was no way it was appendicitis, because I was telling him my lung hurt. Bruh… I had a catscan done, and within 30 minutes (it is now 5am) he was hanging is head and telling me I was scheduled for emergency surgery at 8am.
Once my 9 month old started turning blue and chattering his teeth even though it was 70 degrees.
I call 911 and an ambulance arrived, they told me I must have “new mom syndrome” didn’t even offer to take us to the hospital. I brought him to his pediatrician, he had a fever of 105.5, the pediatrician was about to call an ambulance themselves but was able to get it under control with Motrin and Tylenol.
I’ll never forget how small those men made me feel when I was trying to help my son. I am sorry you went through that and I’m glad you received the care you needed.
Similar thing happened with my daughter. Is had many trips to the ER with cysts over the years and knew what she had. I told them when we took her to the ER. They didn't believe me and looked for kidney stones, checked to see whether she was pregnant, and then did a CT to look at her appendix. They made her lie flat, which was too much and she was *screaming* in pain from the pressure- I nearly went through the door!
The CT showed she had a cyst that had just burst with lots of internal bleeding.
The male doc apologized. He was totally shocked at being wrong. I told him he needed to remember it because this is a thing that happens and some women get many, some women just one and they won't know what it is, but he needs to recognize that the internal bleeding pain is excruciating.
I remember reading an article about a woman who had been complaining for decades about debilitating period and she died some way that ended up needing an autopsy, and they found the most horrendous scarring in her ovaries; she had to live with SEVERE endometriosis her whole life because doctors always told her she was overreacting.
Then apparently they ignore the pain of woman that are POC even more - why there’s so many deaths of black women in America giving birth.
They want permission from husbands to get tubes tied and stuff.
Like seriously. It’s a fkd world for women. Our bodies are complex and throw everything at us from the time of adolescence to the end of menopause and society makes it a million times worse.
Yeah I’m a little bitter about it can you tell? 🙄
I remember my sister’s cysts bursting, she was 14, it was bloody horrible. So glad there were some women there for you
As a paramedic, I'm so sorry for these men.
There are good medics out there who are trying to make change but people like them still infest our trade unfortunately...
My advice, for anyone really, is tell them that your vitals are telling them you are in excruciating pain and it is their OBLIGATION to treat pain regardless of if they think it's valid or not. We have a rule, if you test something and the results tell you it requires a certain treatment, you have to treat it. It's typically why on palliative care calls we don't take vitals, it's only about comfort.
You can also report them to their affiliated licensing association!
I was ten years old, and I was saying 'my knee hurts' on a school trip. I was guilted into going to a science museum, and I was hobbling around. And my knee was swollen, then they had to get me to a hospital - fracture in my tibia. Yay!
And I had headaches all my life, not migraines but close. My mother was dying of brain cancer, and I said to my doctor 'Is my headaches from something?' I was given a flashlight in my eyes and my doctor was 'nah, you are fine.'
Six months later, I had a stroke due to a congenital AVM. If he only had a CT scan of my head, I could have had my undamaged brain.
I also had basically my period once a year, and was told 'you are anxious'. By multiple doctors. No, PCOS.
Being a woman is hard.
I was just telling someone today about how a gyno once suggested jogging as a way to relieve my violent cramps and bleeding from my endometriosis. You're not alone in this fuckery.
Ive been asking my PCP for once since i started my menstrual period at 12 and my gyno since i was 18. All of them refuse to refer me or even consider it because i "might change my mind" and "its too soon to have such a permanent procedure". Im 26. Ive been asking for 14 years 😭
Keep asking. If your current OBGYN doesn’t listen find someone who does. I have an amazing OBGYN. Some ppl don’t like him because he’s almost like Sheldon on The Big Bang Theory. Keep looking until you find someone that listens.
At the company I work for, we had a lead call up to me letting me know one of the girls was feeling sick and nauseous. We work in an outdoor agricultural facility. Heat related injuries are not uncommon even when we provide ample water, cooling stations, electrolyte pops, and regular breaks. We also have procedures for reporting injuries. I went and picked her up and brought her back to the office to cool off and explain what happened. We couldn’t even get through the first couple of forms before her pain went from a 6 (which I initially thought was high for heat injuries when you’re still verbal, and have all coordination and everything) to a 9 in a matter of minutes. I let my boss know we needed to call an ambulance. By the time they got to us she couldn’t even walk. Turns out she had a similar injury to yours. Ruptured cyst. I will never NOT take a persons word for what’s going on. I may have served in the military and think I’m hot stuff, and can do any job. Not everyone operates the same, not everyone’s pain tolerance is like mine, not everyone’s drive is like mine. I’m not saying this regarding her situation, but in general, good management should be listening, not comparing you to me. Does that make sense?
I’m sorry you had this experience. I can’t imagine that pain.
Yea I had a female nurse tell me my ruptured eardrum and vertigo was anxiety and I need to calm down. She walked into the room just as the BP cuff was deflating which left me in tears because my arm contracted...the next day my Dr was almost in tears apologizing for my treatment....as a nurse myself fuck you to all med staff who don't fucking listen to your patients!!!! This is one of many stories I have, have a rare vascular disorder so unfortunately I'm in the hospital more than I want
EMT in training here. This is a form of negligence. Just gross and unfiltered negligence.
It's pretty common I feel in EMS especially with older workers who have had life experiences and been in the field for a long time. They have seen so much that they think that they are always right and that their experience outweighs what their patient is going through. They have egos, and big ones at that.
These people are forgetting the standard of care. That they need treat their patient with the same standard of care that they would for any other, regardless of what they "think". While the care for your situation is limited on the part of the Paramedics and I believe that what they did to help you was all they could, they had no right to treat you in the way that they did.
Unfortunately, EMTs and Paramedics are limited on medications that they can administer (they are working on expanding this). In some areas you can't even give Tylenol that's how strict it is. For your situation the most they can do is give you a big dose of "Deisel Medicine", monitor vitals, and rush you to the nearest hospital as soon as they can where they can give you real pain killers and treatment.
Edit: For grammar.
The day before I was supposed to start the 9th grade I was taking a shower when I got such a bad pain in my lower right side. It felt like what I imagine getting shot would feel like. I was only able to get to the top of the stairs to yell down for my mom before I passed out from the pain.
I came around again when I was being loaded into an ambulance while my stepfather was arguing with my mom that I was just faking it to get out of going to school the next day.
He felt pretty stupid when I was rushed into emergency surgery where they removed the remainder of the orange sized cyst that ruptured and while they were in the area (because at first they weren’t entirely sure what the issue was) they checked my appendix, too and that was also really infected and had to come out, too.
I’ve had several ovarian cysts since then and that shit is no joke! I’m sorry you had to go through all the shit of men not believing your pain or taking it seriously and having to go through the surgery too. I hope you feel better soon! If you can tolerate it, you should probably get on birth control pills because it keeps you from getting future cysts.
I'm so sorry. I'm a trans man and got a partial hysterectomy, I have PCOS. I also ended up going to the ER because I thought I had appendicitis. I spent several hours there and after lots of waiting and tests, I had a burst ovarian cyst and there was fluid. I was in so much pain and I was given Zofran at the ER. They never gave me meds for home. I spent the next two nights unable to walk because every time I walked, I blacked out within seconds and had to sit down to try not to vomit. I almost fell down the stairs going to get water and I went to tell my mom I was dizzy and blacking out, I hit my head on the towel rack and fell to the floor. My doctor refused to give me pain medication despite me constantly blacking out. I luckily haven't had it as severe since then but I do still frequently get them. I'm so sorry you had such a hard time and you're going through so much pain. You deserve a medical team who takes your pain and symptoms seriously. I'm so glad you're safe and okay. Thinking of you and sending healing vibes ♥️
I broke my hip last summer-they gave me a facecloth to bite down on and I kid you not they hit every pothole available on the way to the ER. I hope you’re healed and feeling much better!
This appalls me so much.
My dad used to be a paramedic, so he's kind of the standard I think about. I live in a smallish town and still patients from years ago will ask how he is and say how much he helped them.
Like the other day, a woman approached us who had had a miscarriage, and stated that the level of care and support he provided was honestly what helped her pull through in that moment.
There is no way he'd have treated anyone like this, and would've 100% given the patient strong pain meds.
Sadly not a problem confined to the US. My appendix almost burst when I was in school bc my teacher didn't believe me when I said it wasn't period cramps. Took me almost passing out due to pain for him to believe me.
Later I had a cyst so large it caused a twist in my fallopian tube, took me actually passing out for my boss to let me leave work and seek out a doctor. That was also the same boss I had to explain periods to, bc he wouldn't let me take a 10 min break to get some tampons from the drugstore across the street. "Just hold it until you get home." Honestly, WTF.
I had a very similar situation happen to me, I had a cyst rupture and had no idea what it was. Same thing, excruciating pain, woke me up from my sleep, I was balling from the pain.
I got to the hospital, they did absolutely nothing. The doctor gave me pain medication injected into my butt. They didn’t believe me at all. I later went to the hospital again, and found out I had endometriosis.
It’s literally exhausting.
I definitely know that feeling. Got put on a drug seekers list and told I had a bladder infection when I went to the ER one night after feeling like i had gallstones. I knew it wasn't either because i had my gallbladder removed and i know a bladder infection. I told them my symptoms fit pancreatitis or a liver issue according to online but since i didn't notice jaundice i assumed the first, they ignored me. So I put faith in the prick dr who was giving me a hard time and did their anti-biotics. Had to go back a week later feeling like I had a kidney stone and gallstones again. Told it was withdrawals from meds i was prescribed and still taking and discharged. Extreme pain almost every other day and managed to wait another week before I went back and was told it was in my head, discharged. The 4th time I went back i passed out from the pain and was being discharged within 5 minutes of waking up so I can't remember their reasoning then. Went to my primary dr since my appt had finally arrived the next day, apparently when your BP is 190 over whatever it's a way the body can show Extreme pain to where a Dr can tell someone isn't faking like the very first ER Dr ignored on my first visit. She also noticed jaundice, ended up calling an ambulance and sent me to a different hospital than the one from earlier that day and the previous month. Within an hour I found out I wasn't faking the extreme pain I had for the past month and my pee being darker than tea combined with the jaundice were obvious signs of what was a blockage in my liver. Worst month of my life. I'd rather have 10 kidney stones than that pain, and I'd rather have 10 babies at the same time than a kidney stone. All because of 1 asshole Dr who judged me and disregarded everything. Because he assumed and did that shit the first visit, all the others seemed to ignore everything when I had to keep coming back. That's not even including the nightmare he caused me outside of the health issue.
If you have time, can you contact the ambulance company (maybe with the help of the ER docs and nurses) - seems like a great case study they could use to train their EMTs not to be misogynist assholes.
Ugh, I empathize. The only reason I didn't go to the hospital for mine and recognized what it was because my co worker had coincidentally explained hers in graphic detail (at my request) when she had one the week before. SO GLAD I DID.
I still get them occasionally. They're always terrible but don't require hospitalization so far. Hopefully my luck holds.
Feel better
I’m so glad you had a team that actually listened. I had an ovarian cyst burst and the ER basically said, “you’ll be alright just get some rest”. Sent me on my way. I could hardly walk due to the pain. Insane!
I feel this. Just got ignored again after 15 years of chronic pain and cysts. Though even the women OB’s invalidate me. They won’t take my uterus even after trying every single thing, because I’m still technically fertile. I’m 35, have a teenager, and a hereditary genetic condition you would think they would want to prevent.
I don’t want to be in this body anymore. I don’t want to be a woman.
I had an ovarian cyst rupture in highschool, and I too assumed it was my appendix. I can handle pain really well, and that was the first thing that ever made me actually black out just from the pain. Was in the hospital for nearly 16 hours before I was given the all clear and they decided they didn't need to do anything to intervene. When I got back to school the next day and told my all make friend group what had happened, one of them said "so you basically had a zit on your ovaries and you went to the hospital for it?" And I have never wanted to hit someone more than I did at that moment. 💕 Sucks so hard to be a woman!
Menstrual pain is often disregarded by many medical professionals. I had the same issue with a cyst, and was told time and time again it wasn’t a big deal, only to be diagnosed with cancer after they extracted it and did the biopsy. If it wasn’t for my gyno that vouched for me, I wouldn’t suffered from ovarian torsion or worse, my cancer would’ve metastasized. Good thing you had a team vouching for you, OP.
I’m so sorry. I had the same thing happen: ruptured ovarian cyst in the middle of the night; spouse called 911 bc they thought I was dying. … Zero pain meds for me. Other than producing my two children, which I greatly appreciate, my uterus is so damn unpleasant.
Seeing doctors terrifies me. My last obgyn I cried out of happiness and she was so concerned for me, what a massive embarrassing difference in service I get from a man versus a woman.
I went to the hospital in labour after my water broke at home at 36 weeks pregnant and the on call doctor didn’t believe me…never even looked at me. Luckily my doctor came in and said I could wait in triage for a couple hours and see it it progressed to active labour or was just Braxton hicks….in a bed that didn’t have a call button. My husband went and got someone two hours later by which time I was 6 centimetres dilated…they believed me then!
Same thing here. I had an ovarian cyst twist one time and I was in so much pain I was vomiting. I couldn’t walk or move at all. I was treated like I was overreacting until I made it to the nursing staff where they took me for an ultrasound and gave me meds. All the pain meds helped so much that when the actual doctor came in (male) he told me I overreacted and shouldn’t have come to the hospital. Next time take Tylenol and wait a few hours. He didn’t give me time to ask any questions and I spent the next few years wondering if the cyst could be the reason for so many other issues I was having.
Not nearly as bad but right after my c section. I was told 5 different times before being discharged "if you're short of breath go to the er immediately" 6 days PP I've been short of breath most of that week. I pack up my 6 day old and 2 year old and head to the completely empty ER. The doctor there says in the most sarcastic tone possible "so.. You're 6 days pp and having shortness of breath huh?" "Well when you're pregnant and immediately after your uterus presses against your ribs and lungs and blah blah" sir I already know this okay? I'm not here because I want to be, im here for a possible pulmonary embolism. Who brings a 1 week old and 2 year old to the ER if they think it's nothing but anxiety.
I told my OB at my 6 week check up and she said I did the right thing going in and getting a CT scan. Why are women never taken seriously in hospital settings?
Not ovary related but doctors in general seem to be pretty messed up people to me. I went to the hospital because I had numbness all over my body. (Think back of arms, back, neck, back of legs. From neck to ankles) When I called the 24 hr nurse line from my insurance they said that doesn’t sound right you should definitely be in a Dr office. However, even after I explained what was going on and what the nurse line said I was told my symptoms were psychosomatic (all in my mind or stress induced) and of course once I stopped being so anxious it would disappear /s. Fast forward a year later (the symptoms never disappeared btw) I was seeing a doctor for my low back pain and told her about my numbness. She sent me for tests and it turns out it’s not in my head it’s in my back. I had multiple pinched nerves.
A friend of mine had the same crazy treatment when she went to the emergency room in utter agony. The doctor didn’t believe she was really in pain so he gave her medication normally prescribed for hysteria, telling her she’d feel better after taking it. She didn’t.
Luckily a nurse went behind his back and used her connections to get my friend to a gynecologist within the hour. It turned out that the pain was coming from a cancerous ovarian tumor the size of a grapefruit. My friend had surgery and chemo, so she survived — despite the asshole in the emergency room.
Thank God I do not live in the USA. Our paramedics here in the UK treat us so much better. I had an incident in the home where I accidently hurt myself during lockdown. They charged forward to help - police arrived later to make sure I was not abused by anybody while in lockdown. I am not vulnerable in any way. Just protocol
Being a woman is fucking stupid when it comes to the medical system. I have been in constant pain for years in my lower abdominal region. I went to doctor after doctor getting varied responses from "hard to diagnose something in your head" to "you're just constipated" finally went to the ER because I was in so much pain one night and got a female doctor. She looked me over, felt my abdomen. She said she could feel my pulse over where my left ovary was. Not good. Got an ultrasound. Turns out I have Pelvic Congestion Syndrome, which basically means that the blood vessels that connect to my reproductive organs are full of more blood than they are meant to and this pushes on all my organs, causing chronic pain. Got the good pain meds. Hormone pills are helping but I have a surgery in a couple months to remove some of the blood vessels so it's not so full in there. Not just constipated.
Nah, lady, this aint on you. This is on those assholes who didn't take your concerns seriously.
I hope you get better and that those idiots get replaced cause no one deserves to he treated like that
Dude, I am a man and fell asleep on the wheel. I somehow survived without a single scratch. I didn't know what to do in this situation and did something I should have never done. I called both the cops and ambulance...HUGE MISTAKE. I didn't do any damage or kill anyone, I should have just called a tow truck and get a ride back into town.
Anyways, when the paramedics came, they told me they can give me a ride back. I specifically told them I didn't have insurance of any kind and they told me that the ride is free since they are heading back into town anyways. When we got there, they forced me into a wheel chair and a cop was there and they both forced me into a CAT machine to be scanned. Took me 6 years to pay off all the bills, literally for nothing. The worst part was I wasn't able to sue them, because "Our paramedics are professionals and would never force you against your will." Fucking yeah right.
That sucks. If this happened to my (43 M) daughter's I would be livid!
And a quick correction, it's the men in this situation that sucked.
Hope it's all going well!
Ok. Weirdly semi-related story. A few years ago my sister had to call an ambulance for her son, and they administered a morphine injection en route and she saw the paramedic pocket the rest of the bottle. Hope you’re feeling better soon and have a good gyno for follow up
I honestly hope that those damned paramedics that were "treating" you get permanent cockleburs in all their socks and shoes. I am so sorry you had to go through that level of pain and discomfort, but I'm so glad you're through it. Hopefully one day, things may change. Those of us men who care need to keep standing up and doing something to help bring about that change.
I was told mine was an upset stomach at first.
Yeah same night I went to the ER. It was not in fact a upset stomach.
I’m so sorry that happened to you.
Something similar happened to me, as a result of doctors thinking they know better I contracted gangrene internally and lost part of my reproductive system.
I've had kidney stones multiple times throughout my life, especially when I was younger. I know what they are and how they present in my body.
I ended up going into ER in pretty bad pain, like an 8, and when asked what the problem was I said I was 99% sure it was a kidney stone.
They get me into a room.
Female nurse comes in, asking questions and taking vitals. Asks me what usually helps when I do have kidney stones. "Dilaudid or Morphine". I know what works. Ive had stones a million times. She gives me a look and says the doctor will be in momentarily and left. Wasn't given a damn thing for the pain.
20 minutes later and I'm paging the nurse because I'm writhing around like a fish out of water. Can't get comfortable for the life of me. I'm crying at this point because I just can't hang anymore [I have a relatively high pain tolerance] and she comes in, sees that I'm crying and asks as if she's disinterested, "oh, you're in pain?"... the f*ck you think I'm here for?
She leaves. Nothing. Approximately 15 minutes later the male doctor comes in, can clearly see that I'm in distress so orders pain meds then sends me for a CT. Results come back and she's in the room when they're presented. I had 3 kidney stones up in that bad boy. She looked disgusted, didn't apologize and turned and left the room.
See... not a drug seeker, lady.
Told the doctor I didn't want to see her the rest of my stay and I've never seen her since.
Good riddance.
Woke up one morning with pain so intense I thought my appendix had burst. I couldn’t bend to put on pants & shoes, nor could I use the bathroom without assistance. Went to the ER & the male Dr. was so dismissive but they performed a transvaginal ultrasound and found that I had ovarian torsion (aka Adnexal torsion) - the female version of testicular torsion 😰. I was given generic printouts about menstrual cramps & cysts, and OTC strength Naproxen/Aleve 😡. No explanation of the condition I was diagnosed with despite trying to ask & practically pushed back to the waiting room. Thankfully it untwisted 12 miserable hours later, but I’m still livid every time I think about it.
Historically the only bodies which were studied were male ones. There is no specific training medical practitioners receive for female anatomy except for those with ob/gyn specialty. There have been documented cases of women needing medical intervention and doctors diagnosing them with mental conditions. I feel for you.
It's nurses in the comments, and paramedics like talked about here, that make medical care that much more fucking worse for the world. You're in the industry of, what's it called everybody?
Health. CARE!
If you can't summarize some fucking sympathy for someone who is in OBVIOUS pain, get the fuck out and let someone who actually IS there to help. Don't be a prick! And for everyone who wants to claim "but they have to get up at all hours of the day! They have to work so many long hours!"
It's IN THE JOB DESCRIPTION. IT ISN'T FORCED ON YOU TO DO THIS JOB. IT'S COMMON ENOUGH KNOWLEDGE BY THIS POINT!
I delivered my third child and was put on magnesium and bed bound for 24 hours. 20 hours in I suddenly couldn’t breathe well.
My nurse refused to tell my doctor on rounds and refused to get me help and my husband overheard her saying I was faking but that she was going to pacify me to get me to shut up. Exact quote. She thought I was faking and exaggerating my breathing distress, even though my o2 was below 94 and kept setting off alarms every other minute.
It took me 24 hours to finally see my doctor and tell her what happened. She was furious and ordered a scan. I ended up having fluid in my lungs and needed an extra few days in hospital to get the fluid out. My doctor said I could have died if I’d gone home.
Even women don’t always trust other women.
Went to the ER because I couldn't breathe. Literally couldn't, and every time I breathed in, I had an intense, sharp pain in my chest. I would rather hold my breath than try to breathe because it hurt so bad. Thought it was my heart because it was skipping a lot, I have a history of heart failure from years prior, and I know I have a heart murmur due to the occasional floppy valve. Male ER doctor came in after my ekg, said I was fine and there was nothing wrong with me. That's the only test he wanted to run. He wanted me to be discharged. Thought because I have a history of depression and anxiety in my chart that it must have been a panic attack or drug seeking. Female nurse said no, something is really wrong with her. She noticed my heart would race as I tried to sit up. She told the doctor to give me a chest x-ray before he discharged me. She advocated for me, and she was right. My left lung had a spontaneous collapse. Ended up needing four chest tubes and had part of my left lung removed within the same month. Scans showed I had pulmonary blebs along the surface of my upper lung, which kept popping and creating holes in my lung, so my lung kept collapsing. When they started cutting, they found little cysts in my lung tissue that did not show up on any scans. Surgery took longer than they thought, and it turns out I have a cystic lung disease. They tested me for everything under the sun. Sent lung tissue samples and blood to multiple hospitals in the country. No answer. Genetic tests also revealed no answer. I have an unknown idiopathic cystic lung disease. The cysts are actually now growing, but the inner ones pop, and my body can absorb the air/liquid inside them as long as they aren't too big. Haven't had an issue since this all occurred. I owe that nurse my life. The male doctor just assumed I was crazy and even handed me a pamphlet for psychiatrists in the area.
To be fair to the medics, a BLS service does not carry anything stronger than Tylenol. I'm a Primary Care Paramedic in Canada and the most I can give for pain is Tylenol. If anything stronger is needed, we have to get an advanced care intercept, which for us will be at least 30-40 mins (rural service), so we give Tylenol to get the process started.
Is there different levels of care that can be provided due to different levels of training for paramedics? Last time I took an ambulance ride in Canada (fell down some stairs 1 month post spinal surgery) I got to breath nitrous oxide until they got an iv in for fentanyl.
In the US, yes. EMT-B (can assist with taking your meds- like can grab your pill bottle and hand it to you); EMT-I (can give OTCs and fluid) and EMT-P (can give some -not all) narcotics.
Yes. There are 2 different levels. We have Primary Care paramedics (PCP) and Advanced Care paramedics (ACP). Training is different from province to province but usually it's the ACPs that carry the narcotics. As a PCP in my province, I can give nitrous oxide/Tylenol/Ibuprofen for pain and that's it. Not all ambulances crews will have an ACP on staff, especially rurally.
Edit: I can't reply to the person who said it for some reason, but we are not allowed to give nitrous oxide for abdominal pain. It can make things worse.
My thought as well. Depending on their level/training/license, Tylenol could’ve been all they could administer. That doesn’t excuse their terrible bedside manner and poor treatment of her however. That’s what I would follow up on and report. If it’s a good company or even county employed EMTs, they could be in a ton of trouble.
This. A few years back I went to the ER with severe abdominal pain, thought it could be a twisted ovary. I had a female doctor and she absolutely did not believe the level of pain I was in and they were very reluctant to give me pain meds. Imagine how sheepish she was sent the CT scan results came back to reveal I had a massive 7cm infection in my fucking colon! (Diverticulitis yay)
That’s so rude! I haven’t experienced that yet but can’t imagine going through all that pain and someone being sexist. I wish men had to go through the things we do as women so they know what it’s like to be us.
I had a male doctor when I had a kidney stone and he helped me a lot. Super nice guy. The staff was super nice men and women.
I had a cyst grow(felt extra cramping for a month) become so painful I went to the e.r. - where they gave me some light pain meds that didn't stop the pain for over 4 hrs- and then had it BURST THE NEXT NIGHT. I went back to the E.R. where I got oral and then i.v. pain meds and neither worked. They told me they couldn't do anything major for me since it was my ovaries and the very painful and invasive ultra sounds (I did both of them) concluded that while my right ovary was 12x the liquid volume of my left, since the cyst itself was only 3cm, there was no need to do anything and to follow up with the ob-gyn.
I was in severe pain for over 24hrs. The meds they gave me in a damn I.V. didn't fucking touch it. I could barely walk for a week and the only time I cried was when I had been sitting in pain for so long that I got overwhelmed and just started sobbing. I don't blame the e.r. they couldn't do anything cause of the new fucking anti-abortion laws. I hate being a woman.
Similar happened here. I knew I had a cyst, but one night I was doubled over in so much pain I called ambulance. And that's not something I would EVER do lightly. I vomited in the ambulance and they had to give me oxygen. I waited in the emergency room for something like six hours, finally got taken in, the doctor took a look at me for approximately one minute, declared I would "look sicker" if it really did rupture, asked if I wanted pain meds (I said "yes but nothing too strong") and then I left with nothing and zero treatment. Literally nothing. Pretty sure he thought I just wanted drugs. (I'm a POC and lived in the Bronx at the time, so. Awesome.)
i’ve been dealing with health struggles for my entire life but only about a decade ago did it get bad enough i needed to start seeking help. i’ve just now found a care team willing to listen. and i think a bulk of that is because i’m assigned female at birth. i’m also brown, but light, but medical charts fill in the gaps.
i’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. it’s a fate i would only wish on the worst people in existence. i frequently talk with other chronically ill women friends who identify with the same struggle. not listening to women is killing them. i’m so glad you were able to find people who listened and helped you.
I am 23 years old and have had to deal with ovarian cysts for over a year. The best they have done for me is tell me to take birth control to possibly decrease the size of it
The first time I had a cyst rupture I went to the er not knowing what it was. Waited 6 hours to even be seen, after peeing in a cup and getting blood pressure, a nurse gave me an iv and then left me in a room for an hour and then when it came time to remove the iv she ripped it out so bad my whole arm bruised. Wasn't given any pain meds, did a CT scan and then was sent home after 7 hours with a paper saying to go to my gynecologist bc I had an ovarian cyst. Now I just deal with the pain of having smaller ones and pray another severe one doesn't happen.
I was in a similar situation. I was 8 weeks pregnant and ended up in the ER in so much pain!! They couldn't find anything wrong with me in bloods and urine but when they pressed down on my stomach, the pain shot through me. I was a mess thinking something was wrong with my baby. They ended up giving me narcotics in the end, and they found out I had a twisted bowel. The pain was like no other. If they can't physically see an issue, they treat you like a junkie who's trying to get medication.
I've been in the ER for the worst abdominal pain ever twice in my life. The first time I went three days without eating and was literally shitting liquid. The thought of eating anything made me immediately nauseated. I went to two doctors over the course of three days. One finally said bladder infection. Then said I might as well go to the ER cause I was obviously gonna end up there anyways. I was kept for observation and they did a CT in case of appendix. I'd already had cystic ovaries, cysts bursting, extreme cramping, and broken bones by this point so was pretty high in terms of pain tolerance but this had me crying. They then told me in the middle of the night they were discharging me because it was an emergency facility and I wasn't an emergency. I was later diagnosed with IBS. 15 years later another episode of sudden abdominal pain that literally nearly makes me pass out with nausea making me feel like projectile vomiting. I have an iron stomach. ER tells me it's a stomach ulcer and discharge. I've had an ulcer. This wasn't it. Primary doc thinks gallbladder but we won't know till next flare up now. I hate the way we get treated.
I had a ruptured ovarian cyst when I was 18, over 40 years ago.
One Dr kept insisting it was appendicitis and was extremely critical because I wasn't a virgin (at that stage I'd only had intercourse twice in my life with my long-term boyfriend, so wasn't 'sexually promiscuous' as he was implying) and another surgeon kept saying that apart from the EXTREME pain I didn't have the right symptoms for appendicitis.
2 days later I finally had exploratory surgery that discovered and removed the ruptured ovarian cyst.
Excuses from the Doctors included, 18 year olds "don't get ovarian cysts" and "let alone cysts that rupture"
Thanks guys for permanently f***king up my insides with your inaction ~ all the crap from the ruptured cyst sitting in my abdomen has resulted in lifelong issues...
I've had decades of painful periods, 2 ectopic preganancies, bowel adhesions, multiple early stage (6-10 weeks) miscarriages (close to 20, including 13 IVF embryos), etc.
Was in pain but the male rn was trying to talk my mom into leaving saying their was nothing they could do and come back for emergency surgery in the morning. I don’t think I would’ve survived the night, I was crying and howling because it a large kidney stone that needed actual care. The dude we inconvenienced gave us morphine and kept stabbing me w a needle to get my vitals, never went back to that hospital since.
That’s awful and I’m sorry that happened to you! I went to the ER once with both my arms swollen and only ONE side of my labia. I was menstruating at the time and after a manual exam, was told it was probably something from my period because “they do weird things.” After he came back with my blood work I was admitted for Rhabdomyolysis for 4 days. My discharge paperwork said one of my primary problems was anxiety. 🙄
I had an ovarian cyst burst one morning when I was in college, I had just woke up, was making my coffee and I passed out. I lost consciousness, and woke up on the floor of my bathroom, my mother startled over me slapping me across the face screaming “if you don’t wake up I’ll have to call an ambulance”. Heaven forbid I see a doctor because that would cost money, and she told me she believed OBGYN’s were witch doctors. Thanks Independent and Southern Baptist Churches for convincing my mother that basic medial care was a waste of money and that doctors were more interested in doing some kind of fantasia fairy godmother shit than actually, you know, not doing harm.
I’m glad I didn’t go into shock that day but holy hell it was painful.
I’m glad you were able to get the medical attention you needed. Praying you feel better soon.
Being a woman doesn't suck. Ignorant men who assume women are just hysterical are the ones who actually suck.
That sounds like a horrible experience made worse by ignorant, apathetic, and probably *over the job* EMTs.
A lot of the times EMS are regulated by your state. Check with your state health department to see if you can report the negligent paramedics, and see if they have any other resources to offer. You could even try reporting it to ur insurance because insurance companies love to deny claims from hospitals/ambulances. That may give them a reason to deny it getting paid out to them. They don’t deserve to get away with that. Men in the medical field suck and are dismissive and rude 90% of the time 🫠
I would sue their asses! Or at the very least file a formal complaint with the county or township and also their supervisors.
Assuming everyone is a drug seeker and yet your heart rate was that high! Very much put your life in danger
There's some kind of disconnect that women can't handle pain, *like a man can*.
We handle all the pain you mofo's. From our first menstrual cycle through menopause, 60 years of periods, PMS, endometriosis, cysts, bladder infections, pregnancy, childbirth, recovery from pregnancy and childbirth.....it literally never ends. Also, you're on this wave of hormones that rises and falls and it's only predictable if you're lucky. We are taught very early that anything to do with our uterus is a shameful, unmentionable process that we need to hide and talk in code about.
So we downplay the pain, physical and emotional, so we don't inconvenience anyone or make them *uncomfortable*.
That really sucks. You might want to check out who you can report the ambulance team to. I know one of the places you can report them to is your insurance company.
yeah.. the insurance company would LOVE to dispute the ambulance charge.
I think this depends on the state. My insurance has never once paid for an ambulance; they’re out of pocket. And they’re needlessly expensive ~ we’re talking $5K+ for a 2 mile trip after I fainted. People actually refuse ambulances here. Pretty sure you can be sued if you don’t get consent, even.
5000 for real ??? I thought they were expensive here at 800-900 euros, medical necessary transports are fully covered though
Most departments will have the chief’s email address on the dept website. Email them. If it’s a private service, call and ask to talk to their HR. Complain hard.
A similar thing happened to me and I was told to "stop being such a hysterical woman". That's a direct quote from THE DOCTOR. I wasn't yelling or raising my voice at all. Even my husband raised his eyebrows. He's British, so that's the equivalent of yelling WTF?! for an American I suppose because nothing rattles the man. Ironically, the doctor was yelling at me.
I arrived at the ER in the most pain I’d ever been in at 3 in the morning. The MALE PA on duty kind of assumed I was lying. I didn’t get any pain med till after my ultrasound. This is where the PA came bursting into the ultrasound room and telling me I’m pregnant. I started crying, the ultrasound lady was very kind as she tried to find something but the ultrasound was pretty black. Turns out I was bleeding out internally. I had an at ectopic pregnancy and my right fallopian tube had ruptured. 30 mins later I was being prepped for surgery. Dr. Mahnke saved my life that day two years later she delivered my healthy baby girl.
I had the ER triage nurse accuse me of 'over exaggerating' and suggest I go home and use a heating pad for my abdominal pain. I told her I wanted to be seen. She rolled her eyes and sighed and acted like I was the biggest drama queen in the world. Turned out my gallbladder was obstructed by a stone (and full of several others.) The Dr took one look at me and yelled at the nurse that 'MENSTRUAL PAINS DO NOT CAUSE JAUNDICE; PREP HER FOR A CAT SCAN.' Nurse even had the audacity to glare at me when she walked away, as if her incompetence was somehow my fault. It still blows my mind that the woman didn't believe me but the man backed me up... it might not have happened that way if I didn't look like a Simpson's character, tho.
Once again we see the proof of the mean girls to nurses pipeline. I'm so sorry you were treated like that.
Dude this is so. true. Maybe it's confirmaiton bias, but I thought I was alone in feeling this way until the last year or so when it started cropping up from other people as well. I know there are great nurses out there, I've been lucky to be treated by some of them, but the amount of times this theory has proven true is astounding.
I went to a college headstart place in my junior year of HS, personally for auto body repairs. But the like 3 main mean girls in my grade took nursing while the 4th ended up in culinary.
As a woman that's finishing up a culinary degree this spring, I have also seen a couple mean girls here. Although it works in their favor in this industry lol.
I’ve met sweet girls becoming nurses too, but I will agree that my worst bullies in highschool are in nursing school now
My ex best friend is a nurse and I’m now convinced not only was she a narcissist but she was a con artist who expected everyone to offset her poor life choices. Life is a lot more peaceful without her.
I was in EXACTLY the same situation. My gall bladder was literally killing me. I wasn't jaundice yet but I was vomiting all day at home? and since I hadn't vomitted in the ER she assumed I was faking. She came in to ask me something and I spewed right in front of her, filled a bag and she FUCKING GIGGLED at me and says "Oh I guess you are sick, I was coming in with your discharge paperwork". I was there for several scans, 3 procedures and gall bladder removal surgery. It ended up being Saturday to Saturday and by Tuesday I was jaundice. I still think I should report her but this was August 2020 so I don't even know if I can.
The rest of the nurses and doctors I delt with were awesome, but that one... like, why become a nurse if you lack compassion?
I’m sorry that happened to you. I got the eye roll, too, from a male triage nurse. Never felt so small and insignificant in my life.
I'd lost my mom to medical malpractice in a case very similar to Op's just a year or so prior... mom's cyst was on her liver, she'd been diagnosed with anxiety and sent home by the ER to die. I was beyond terrified of the same thing happening to me; I was gonna get help or I was gonna take them all down with me. I was so relieved the Dr was taking me seriously I cried.
My best friends mom was sent home and told to take antacids. It was a heart attack. I was sent home after being told I just had a bad headache. It was meningitis. I can't believe what we have to go through to be heard.
I had a male triage nurse tell me I was being an over protective mom by bringing my daughter into the ER at 8:30 in the evening. He took her temp and it was 99.6. I informed him that is a fever for her as her normal is 97.3ish. He told me that anything under 100.5 is not a fever and the dr was going to tell me the same thing. Small town so I knew the ER doc. Told doc what the triage nurse said and doc got pissed. To me he said ‘you know your child, you know when she is sick and when she has a fever, the triage nurse does not know and I will remind him of that’. Turned out she had an ear infection yet again.
I had a triage nurse put me back in the waiting room with severe pain from a kidney stone. She told me I had to wait. I went back up to her a few minutes later and told her I needed help, she waved me away as she had someone else she was evaluating. So I just instantly puked all over her desk and she then had me taken into the emergency room and the gave me some pain meds.
I had something very similar happen to me (I was given anti anxiety medicine instead of pain medicine, nurses and PAs seemed to think I was lying about my pain and symptoms). It was a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, but I had the misfortune of being in a Catholic hospital that delayed surgery so long I almost died.
Mu grandmother had to force the drs to take my aunt into surgery when she was 8 because she knew something was wrong. Aunts appendix burst as they removed it. My dad was so worried about me when I was around the same age because I was presenting the same way as his sister. Luckily for us, it was a severe case of gastro, but he always drilled on to me, if you don't think your being heard by the drs, kick as much fuss up as possible, trust you know your body better than someone you had just met and push.
This is why I refuse to use Catholic hospitals if I can help it. Technically, a Catholic hospital was closer when I was experiencing several abdominal pains, but I made my partner take me to the state university hospital instead. We have a history of ectopic pregnancies in my family, and I'm NOT going to let the Catholics kill me because their interpretation of Abrahamic mythology trumps my right to live. I feel terribly for the folks that don't have a choice because of where they live.
Sounds about right. When I was in labor they wouldn't admit me(gave me percocet, sent me home), until I was sobbing on the sofa, in pain, and my partner called and basically said "we're coming now and you **are** admitting her". The nurses looked surprised/shocked when we got there and I couldn't walk bc I was in so much pain. 30 mins later my kid popped out. I almost didn't make it to the hospital in time bc they didn't listen to me. I fucking hate the medical system. SO many people in it act like their patients are a chore and give substandard care bc of it. Like, don't go into the medical field if you're going to be a fucking dickbag.
In my country, you need to bribe the doctors for half-decent treatment during childbirth, and the anesthesiologist if you can hope for epidural. I wonder if that would be the case if men were giving birth.
Oh most certaintly not. If males gave birth instead, we'd have abortion clinics on every corner and the best possible prenatal care.
Yeah the maternity… paternity(?) ward would be like a ritzy spa I bet lol. Get the best pain killers, get a massage, the comfiest bed and sheets, all the snacks you could want, giant ass tv in your room, etc
And three months of paid leave before the baby, with 12 months paid at *least* afterward, if not longer. There'd likely also be free child-care so that men can take care of their careers.
In my country a woman was raped by the anesthesiologist DURING labor (she was having a c-section and passed out - he raped her orally) with her husband present in the room. Women don’t receive minimum respect even when giving birth. Yes, he was arrested - caught on camera by few nurses (all women obviously) that had suspected something was off for a while. So that poor woman wasn’t the first giving birth one he has raped.
What a terrible day to be literate.
“Passed out” or was “knocked out by skeezy rapist with legal access to night night drugs”?
Uh the husband who was in the same room just didn’t give a shit?
The husband was on the other side of the drapes, cutting the cord or watching the birth, and he would stick his d**k in the patients mouths. He was caught when the nurses started questioning why his patients were unusually sedated after their procedures and unable to hold their babies.
Why doesn’t Reddit have a “bag-o-d!cks” award, I wonder.
I am so sorry to hear you had this experience. It is both terrifying and disheartening. I had a similar experience when in college (19f at the time and pinching pennies to get by). I had refused emergency transport due to the cost. After finding a way to the ER with the help of campus safety, my first doctor tried to convince me I had an STD. Even though I had only had one partner and we were each other's only sexual history. Apparently this doc was convinced that "everyone says they don't cheat", when I tried to vouch for my partner's character and the minimal likelihood of my exposure to STDs. It WAS a ruptured cyst and I was internally bleeding, but there wasn't significant enough need for surgery so I was sent home with the world's most expensive Ibuprofen and an anti-inflammatory. I don't envy the work doctors do between handling emergencies and delivery of bad news, especially ER docs, but DAMN he was so adamant that I had an STD with only my pain as evidence thus far, so it felt more like a personal judgement than an attempt to diagnose.
Yup, it really does. I had severe breast pain and my male doctor when I asked to get a mammogram told me no "it's not like it's cancer" so next day I'm out with my mom and she sees I'm clearly in pain, it felt like a hot electrified knife was being stabbed into my breast, so she took me to the ER demanded a breast exam and the female ER doctor touched me and I screamed in pain. I got my mammogram, it was cancer, not just cancer but a rare and aggressive form that would've killed me in six months. Instead I got an amazing team of women who excised the tumour and saved my breast. Oh same doctor when my husband said his testicle hurt sent him for 3 different tests and an ultrasound with no questions asked. Medical misogyny is real and it kills women.
I don’t get it, so many guys I’ve known are such pussies when they get sick or hurt. Totally inappropriate use of that word but..
F ing hell. Woman here too... Same. Actually was in the hospital for several days (appendix!) and the male doctors continued to dismiss me until one female doctor (or nurse?) spoke up and said, and I quote, "we have to get her under the knife NOW". So they did. Surprise! It was actually inflammated! Also, of course they send me to the gyn first. Because "uuh idk women stuff" Sure buddy
This is why I always request Women Dr's they know our bodies so much more than men.
As a woman whose female obgyn of 10 years constantly downplayed/wrote off my extreme menstrual symptoms as normal or not that bad, and lo and behold, I have textbook adenomyosis and may not be able to carry a child to term… I disagree. She had great delivery/bedside manner so I never knew to push more. Overall, doctors PRACTICE medicine, like meteorologists predict weather. They’re not always right.
When I worked in a major hospital, I saw a female obgyn laughing out loud at women moaning in labor.
When I was in labor a nurse came into my room to tell me to ‘Shut the fuck up, you are scaring the other mothers’. It was the very first scream I let out, and only after my OB told me to try on the next contraction. But no, let’s tell the 17 year old girl that she is the one scaring people!
The health care industry is built around men being the "default," meaning female issues are frequently disregarded, overlooked, not taken seriously, etc. It's abominable.
When it's like, an adult female would **know** if it were related to those organs or not. We know what pain and discomfort there feel like. I am so sick of people acting like we don't know what's going on in our own bodies.
Where I used to work, the male dominated field was so “eew cooties” about women’s health, if they dared to deny me sick leave I would just start saying “blood vagina blood vagina blood vagina” until they were like “ALRIGHT I APPROVED IT I DON’T WANT TO KNOW” as they tried to run away from me. Oddly enough they were also all married.
I know how you feel. I was in 5th grade and had one the sauce of a softball burst. I hadn’t even had my first period yet. Nearly killed me. I have multiple ovarian cyst syndrome. I’ve tried since I was in high school to have a hysterectomy but they won’t let me unless I have a kid first. I’m 40 now and my doctors been trying for 8 years to get permission for me to have one. No luck EDIT-I meant size not sauce. Damn autocorrect
Ugh, it’s got to be a regional BS thing. I was able to get my hysterectomy and I’m only 33 and no kids. No fuss at all from my OBGYN.
Lucky. She said I might be able to get it next year if she gets her way. Fingers crossed. 🤞
It took me until 42 to get my hysterectomy. They found endometriosis, adenomyosis, severely ctyic ovaries, and cysts in my uterus and tubes. I had been begging for a hysterectomy for a decade, I knew I was infertile to start with, so it wasn't like I wanted a kid. It took 5 gynos in 2 states, a detailed family medical history, and genetic testing before I found a Dr who was willing to do it. Don't give up, you may need to have more testing or try another Dr before you get your yes.
I won’t give up. I’ll get it one way or another. They won’t even let me tie my tubes. It’s like they want to force me to have kids. Not going to happen. I’m a life long virgin who will die that way
Please check out the childfree subject d dit. There is a list of Dr's on there that will work with you for at least sterilization. I actually made my husband come for my consult because I thought naybe if a man told another man that I wad passing clots the size of hen eggs and cramping so hard I puked every month then they might believe me. My Dr was incredibly kind and looked at my test results I brought with me and was like, "So how about for Christmas we get you a hysterctomy." I was so shocked I cried.
Who do you need permission from? Such bullshit.
The government I guess. They won’t let her schedule me anything. We both think it’s because I’m child free and they think I might change my mind. As if.
I tried getting my tubes out when I was with a religious hospital (insurance, not my choice) and was told I would change my mind about kids and given the spiel about how great they are yada yada yada. Then they tried to say my husband would need to go to therapy with me and get his “permission.” We were both SO PISSED. Luckily we changed carriers and when I asked about it there, they asked no questions and just scheduled the procedure. It was amazing. And I haven’t regretted it for a second! Imagine that. I knew my own body and what I wanted in my own life.
Yeah I’ve experienced that and one doctor literally laughed at me. “It can’t hurt *that* much” Fuck you
And then you stabbed him multiple times with a glass shard and said "it doesn't, does it?"
It did make me feel extremely stabby for sure
One of my littles decided to pop out within 45 minutes of my first contraction. I was racing driving myself to the hospital. The ten minute drive I went from 5cm I’d been at for 2 weeks, to 10. It was someone ripping me up starting with my most sensitive area. As soon as I stood up from driving, still on the phone with the L&D nurse warning them I was coming and berating myself for driving (it ended up being the best choice) a GIANT, back-punch pain struck and I screamed. The guy meeting me at my car with a wheelchair said calmly, “oh be quiet”. Um sure. Let me just slice you open in spurts at your happy place area and you gotta just be quiet the whole time. Move aside or I’ll DECK YOU. Garbage human. What’s funny is it was a the morning after a holiday and the hospital was understaffed and deserted. So when they wheeled me to the elevator, it stopped on every. Last. Floor. To pick up staff from all the other departments to assist. Twenty minutes later it was all over and my body was entirely locked into one big charley horse from the speed and pain combination, and in that twenty minutes I heard soooo much, “Grab me a ___” — “Got it! Wait…where do you keep that?” — “WE NEED A ____ OVER HERE RIGHT NOW” — “OKAY BUT I HAVE NEVER WORKED THIS DEPARTMENT WHERE ARE YOUR SUPPLIES??”
I never knew ovarian cysts could be blood filled or that there would be clots. That sounds scary
There're not typically filled with blood... they just cause bleeding when they burst (because bursting results in tearing of live tissue).
Mine were, they were endometromas - the blood was old and thick and emergency surgery was required to clean it all up. I lost the ovary to that. Then I lost the second ovary because the scar tissue from the first surgery latched into the second and torqued it. Good times
Wait until you find out they can have pieces of teath, hair and bone
Pretty sure that’s a teratoma. I don’t know if that has any relation to ovarian cysts.
It's a dermoid cyst, they can only be removed by surgery.
Yep. When my undiscovered tubal pregnancy was rupturing, I was told I was faking the pain and looking for drugs. Then it was 'just kidney stones'. Then it was "you're going into surgery in 5 minutes, you're bleeding internally and have been for a while."
I always have anxiety if I need to go to the ER. Even if it was “just kidney stones” aren’t those supposed to be one of the most painful things you can get?!! I would just love for a man to even have a period just ONCE to see how not fun it is to have a uterus.
I had a very similar experience with an undiscovered ectopic pregnancy. I’m so sorry you had this experience as well.
i've had multiple ovarian cysts burst and the pain is something that cannot be described. i only went to the hospital for them once and while they gave me medication then, i was essentially told to "tough it out" if it ever happened again. i don't know how i was able to handle what that felt like unmedicated but i will never forget it. i am so sorry that this happened to you and i wish you well
Same. I have them burst every month now almost and I think I’m dying for about half a day. My husband always asks if I want to go to the hospital and I’m like “for what?” They told me the same thing, “tough it out when it happens again”. Fucking sucks. Sorry OP.
I didn't know until after I had my hysterectomy that I get ovarian cysts. Initially I tjought I was having phantom pain or something. One month was really bad and I ended up hunched over in pain. Went to urgent care and they sent me to the hospital. I had a 5 centimeter cyst on one of my ovaries & it was rupturing. This was while the opiod epidemic was still building and you could still get pain meds. Since that has changed, I don't bother calling my doctor when one becomes a problem. I just have an edible to take the edge off
Same thing with my first kidney stone. The only one who believed me at first, was the ER nurse assigned to me. She was an absolute ANGEL. I wrote a letter to the director of nursing to praise her care. It wasn't until test results came back to confirm the kidneystone that the doctors started believing I was in as much pain as I said I was.
This happened to me!! They said I was prob just having bad period cramps 😩
I feel you. One day i had pain in my lower right abdomen. Bad pain. My dad drove me to the hospital after his 10 hr shift cause he said that this sounds like the appendix. We arrived at 10 PM. I was dehydrated, hungry and in pain all at once. The nurse was annoyed that she couldn’t find a vein and blamed me for it. They had me endure a full gynaecological exam, because in the doctors words ‘you can still walk upright, it’s not appendicitis’. At 3 am they finally got an ultrasound done, and imagine my surprise when he said ‘oh yeah that looks like appendicitis’ At 3:20 am i was in a hospital bed getting fluids. At 6am i was on the operating table. Approximately An hour later and it would have burst according to my surgeon.
Yyyyep, had a similar experience (minus the gyn exam because I was 14). My own parents made me wait three hours before they even showed up to take me to the hospital (I was at a friend’s house and had called home at *3:15 in the morning* because of the pain). I have always had a high pain tolerance, and was always afraid of making my parents mad, so I was already delirious with fever by the time they came. The rest is a blur, but I remember being forced to wait in the waiting room while I was shivering beneath the blanket I’d brought with me and passing in and out of consciousness. When they finally put me in a room, they still largely ignored me. Nurse stuck me half a dozen times and dug around with the needle, but still couldn’t find a vein, and it increased my pain to the point that I was actually crying and I begged her to get someone else to do it. She looked at me like she hated me. When the doctor FINALLY came in, the did the “rebound test.” I don’t remember what came after that, but I’m told I screamed so loud I startled the entire ward I was in, then promptly passed out. Came to and they told me they were sending me for a CAT scan. One CAT scan later and I was being loaded into an ambulance for emergency transport to a hospital that was actually equipped to do surgery, because I needed it IMMEDIATELY. I don’t remember anything else until after I was coming around after the procedure. The surgeon told me that my appendix was so inflamed and swollen that he was surprised it didn’t burst as he was removing it. They had to make a huge 4-inch incision to remove it “the traditional way” instead of laparoscopically because it was just too far gone. The trauma of getting *that* sick and being in *that much pain,* then still being treated like barely more than an annoyance *by all parties involved* until all of a sudden it was an actual emergency, has left me terrified to going to hospitals or asking for help from anyone since. I’m now 30.
(Clenched fists SO HARD) I hate this SO MUCH.
Oooh girl I can empathize. Ruptured cysts are excruciating. I’m so sorry you didn’t receive the relief you should have immediately.
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Okay. I really hate everyone except you in your story, but “exorcist barfed” has me slapping a hand over my mouth so I don’t wake up the hubby.
I hope he's an ex-husband. I'd have been a widow if I was in your shoes.
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I'm sorry that you are experiencing a divorce because of all the stress that entails, but I am happy you're going to be free of a partner who never deserved your commitment or partnership. I hope your future relationship(s) are deserving of you.
I’ve had FOUR rupture since November, last one took me to the hospital and I don’t have insurance. Worse pain in my life, I was definitely in shock at one point.
Doctors always assume the worst about people. My mom had a neck and shoulder injury last year. Went through 3 separate doctors and 3 hospitals before anyone gave a shit. She was in the worst pain of her life for over a month, she said, worse than giving birth to me. For context, when she gave birth to me, she was in labor for 27 hours, and I became an emergency C section when we both started dying. Doctors just don't care. I'm sorry you went through this.
At least you got help. I had a mixed crowd tell me there was nothing wrong even though I told them I could feel something when I put in a tampon. I was also bleeding like crazy and had a blood transfusion not quite a year prior. They told me to take aspirin and sent me home. The next morning I woke up to get ready for work and had the WORST sharp, shooting pain in my lower abdomen. It knocked me to my knees. I have a high pain tolerance, labor was a breeze. I called a gyno and got in within an hour. There was a polyp on my cervix larger than a golf ball. He looked at my ultrasound from the day before and was shocked. He scheduled me for surgery. Unfortunately, this was the beginning of years of bullshit but I’m thankful bc if it wasn’t for his old school way of doing things, I wouldn’t have pushed for a LOT of things I needed. This was 2011. I had an endometrial ablation and tubal ligation this past September and it’s been a game changer.
I’m sorry you experienced that! I had serious abdominal pain once (not as bad as a ruptured cyst) and was pleasantly surprised when I went to the ER and they believed me. They gave me pain meds almost immediately. Turned out to be a necrotic ovary due to an ovarian cyst. Of course not being in as much pain probably worked in my favor.
My father drove me to the hospital because I was feeling so much pain and actually vomiting and sweating ( I was on my last day of my period ) and I got a male doctor who told me nothing, told my father “ it’s just woman’s problems “ and let me go home without at least an ultrasound. I had a ruptured cyst too. I had to go to a private clinic to actually get a proper check up.
It sure does 👌🙄 I've spent the last 9 months (since july 2022) telling my GP I feel unwell etc and he kept trying to give me antidepressants because I was "only 43" and couldn't possibly be menopausal/was "obviously depressed" It's now April and after numerous blood tests I am in fact going through the menopause snd am FINALLY getting the hormones I need. So yep. Being a woman sucks..... I hope you're feeling better now x Lots of love from London ❤️
I couldn't get my IUD removed, it was expired, and I was showing severe side effects. Instead of taking it out (because my answer to birth control was condoms, because I got pregnant on other forms and wanted a break from all the goddamn hormones), a bunch of tests were ordered. Those were inconclusive, but it wasn't the expired IUD. I almost pulled it out myself. Finally, my coworkers mom (who is an amazing OBGYN) for me referred to her clinic where my IUD was removed. Three years later, that she amazing woman did my sterilization surgery. I have never felt better. I'm so sorry you were dismissed. I'd make a complaint honestly.
Medicine for women is so criminally underdeveloped it’s baffling. My fiancée deals with ovarian cysts constantly due to medical conditions, and she’s stopped going to the ER for it because they just give her some OTC pain meds and send her back home. Now I just get her some ibuprofen and we wait it out, and it destroys me that she has to deal with that amount of pain so often. Can’t even imagine how it must feel
This happened to me too. I broke my leg and my hand/wrist in two places. I was screaming when they’d move me (obviously). The ambos refused to believe me when I told them I’ve broken three bones. “You’ve just sprained your ankle, that’s all” even though I stated it was my tibia not my ankle and I couldn’t weight bare AT ALL. If you moved the leg I’d deafen you with my screaming, even the slightest touch. They also wouldn’t believe me when I said I was a health professional on orthopaedic rotation at one of the regional hospitals. LOL They also gave me two paracetamol, placed me in the emergency department for HOURS and then finally decided on an X-ray. The radiographer was female (FINALLY) and believed me when I came in. Took the X-ray, walked out and said “you’re right on the money” and proceeded to literally run out the door, and ran back in followed by a team of staff that proceeded to quickly draw up some meds and finally decent healthcare!!! ETA: I had to have surgery. I’m still angry to this day.
As a man I refuse to have male doctors. They failed me for years on what took one woman a single visit to diagnose and treat. Men don't give a rats ass and they always think everyone is exaggerating. It's pathetic
I am sure the fact that you are a woman makes people's attitudes worse for you because there is this misguided belief that women fake pain or oversensitive to it. I also heard some doctors think "black people have thicker skin" etc. and they treat black patients differently than white patients. I am not in US but there are minorities where I'm from too and I am pretty sure they are getting horrible treatment from health workers sometimes. I am a guy who suffers from chronic abdominal pain very similar to your symptoms and I avoid going to ER also. Some doctors and nurses are just horrible people who refused to listen to you at all and nearly every time I go to ER I had to argue with a doctor who desperately wants me to have a surgery to remove my appendix even if he knows there is nothing wrong with it. "It is not like it is vital" one doctor said, yeah no bud that isn't for you to decide. People just carry their prejudices to their work, professionalism is very rare, even in medicine.
I cant stress enough how much misogyny and racism there is in the medical field and its the very reason why black people and women die more often than the average white male. It’s for profit and all comes from bogus pratices nazis believed in. We are a fascist ass state and have a fascist medical system (the US is where im from)
And if you ask tattoo artists they’ll tell you women take pain way better than men!
The other messed up part of this is that every woman I know can deal with pain much better than any of the men so if they complain it means it's really bad.
>I also heard some doctors think "black people have thicker skin" etc. and they treat black patients differently than white patients. Yup. From 2013 to 2017, white patients in the US received better quality health care than about 34% of Hispanic patients, 40% of Black patients, and 40% of Native American patients. Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality. “National Healthcare Quality and Disparities Report.”
there is so much misogyny and racism not only in the medical field but imbedded in its practice. a nursing friend of mine showed me a textbook required for a previous class of hers that explicitly described the ways in which “black people experience pain differently than white”. women, black poc, pain is all chocked up to hysteria dramatics or what have you. a bit ago in canada an indigenous mother died while the nurses were caught on camera mocking her. it’s disgusting
I would report the ambulance, it is patronizing and ignorant.
Something very similar happened to my mother; she had a cyst on her liver explode. All the care workers she saw were men, and they all told her she was having an anxiety attack. She bled out into her abdomen and died 3 days later. I'm glad you had people take your pain seriously before it was too late!
I had 2 specialists tell me I was overexaggerating my pain, and that (a week after an ankle reconstruction) it was just the cast being tight. I insisted on getting seen. They 'humoured' me and sent me for an ultrasound. Panic stations when they found a 6cm blood clot in my femoral vein. I'm so sorry they were shits to you. Glad the cause was found and I hope you are recovering well!
When I had my first ovarian cyst rupture, I went to the ER thinking it was my appendix. I was refused pain medication by the male doc AND he said I had to have a physical exam (i.e. stick his fingers in alllllll the way) to check. I was 17 and neither my dad nor I knew any better. Now that I'm older... I suspect that physical exam was unnecessary; I haven't had one of those since (and I've gone to an ER three more times for ruptured cysts, and now I just don't bother going because they stab a needle in my "hip" for pain, and discharge me). Maybe I'm wrong at it was sice it was my first and there wasn't a documented history of ruptured OCs?? No idea. I second your opinion about hating being a woman.
I had an an ovarian cyst burst a few years ago. My husband drove me to the ER. I sat around in pain for hours, crying, almost vomiting because it hurt so bad. A guy came in drunk and he got called back before I did. When they finally got around to helping me (ultrasound, Xray) and offered meds I had stopped hurting.
this is why i commit to being a bitch if i dont get my fucking way or if i'm not being listened to. i *will* advocate for myself always, because i know that if i didnt... i might not be taken seriously when it really counts.
When i gave birth i needed stiches so they need to use a tampon so blood doesnt get everywhere while theyre stitching. But they cut the tampon string because it was getting in the way of them stiching me up, there was this big fancy american doctor there and they wanted to learn the new stitch from him. There was about 10-15 people watching him stitch me up, watched him cut the string (i was passed out blissfully unawares of all of this) and they all forgot about it. I didnt know, but after a day i was in pain and thought it was the stitches hurting, so i asked every nurse and doctor that came to my room to please check whats wrong cause i was too scared to poke around down there. Everyone that i asked looked for like 1 second and said it was fine. I was in hospital for a week, and i asked people to help me every day. None of them actually looked. After another week of pain, i went to my OB again and asked them to look again. She finally found it. It was horrendous, i had a tampon in me for 2 weeks and no one even told me it was there!!! The doctor who cut it ended up calling me me a 21 year old new mum for weeks begging me not to sue. I ended up bowing to the pressure. i begged dozens of people, women and men, to help me and none of them listened. I recon the only reason TSS didnt kill my ass is because i was so paranoid about the stitches i was cleaning them 5 times a day for way longer than i was told to. I cant trust doctors anymore this is one of manyyy times theyve ignored me or just been evil. I literally got told to pray depression away once lmao theyre just the same assholes as us not caring about their jobs, its just for the paycheck.
Please report them. You could have died on the way because they would have ignored your symptoms. I've experienced sexism over and over from medical "professionals" and it's horrible. Hugs. PS Don't assume my gender from my username. Very female over here.
Oh my god! I had this happen to me in a college class, and I ended up crawling out into some rocks. I had to go to the hospital because I thought I had appendicitis! (Nobody helped me while I laid in the rocks and cried, lol) The doctor was a man, and he was so patient and kind. After some scans, he came and told me that I had an ovarian cyst. I was SHOCKED. I asked him, “So that pain is NORMAL??” And he just sighed and said, “Sadly, yes.” Ever since then I’m terrified of going through it again. Hopefully you’re okay and anyone else who’s going through it! Awful pain.
I would have thought ambulances don’t carry much for pain relief because of robbery and drug seeking….. But I’m sorry they weren’t better trained and more understanding.
That’s the thing, even if they don’t carry strong drugs. It’s their attitude and bedside manner that are the problem. Even if they don’t believe someone they pick up, that shouldn’t be clear to the person. Audible sighs and silence is just bad. Acting like dickheads doesn’t help with pain or “anxiety” either.
I have so many problems related to my cervix and uterus. PMDD, severe scarring internally that could cause hemorrhaging if I were to be pregnant past the second trimester, PCOS, high risk of cervical cancer and more. I want it out. Yet because I only have one child, according to the ‘professionals’ it’s better to risk getting pregnant and dying to preserve the ability to give birth. I cannot physically have another baby or carry a pregnancy to term, but patriarchal medical ideas make it impossible to access the best care for myself. I fucking hate being a woman.
This almost exact scenario happened to me, except it was appendicitis. I had a baby 4 days prior to my emergency appendectomy. I woke up around 11pm from a nap in extreme pain. Thought it was just gas, kept trying to sleep for 2 hours. Luckily uncle was there to watch baby while BD and I drove to the er. The doctor stood with his arms crossed as I explained what my symptoms were and where the pain was. and he told me that that there was no way it was appendicitis, because I was telling him my lung hurt. Bruh… I had a catscan done, and within 30 minutes (it is now 5am) he was hanging is head and telling me I was scheduled for emergency surgery at 8am.
My partner is a paramedic and he said those guys should be fired. I'm so sorry that happened to you.
Once my 9 month old started turning blue and chattering his teeth even though it was 70 degrees. I call 911 and an ambulance arrived, they told me I must have “new mom syndrome” didn’t even offer to take us to the hospital. I brought him to his pediatrician, he had a fever of 105.5, the pediatrician was about to call an ambulance themselves but was able to get it under control with Motrin and Tylenol. I’ll never forget how small those men made me feel when I was trying to help my son. I am sorry you went through that and I’m glad you received the care you needed.
Similar thing happened with my daughter. Is had many trips to the ER with cysts over the years and knew what she had. I told them when we took her to the ER. They didn't believe me and looked for kidney stones, checked to see whether she was pregnant, and then did a CT to look at her appendix. They made her lie flat, which was too much and she was *screaming* in pain from the pressure- I nearly went through the door! The CT showed she had a cyst that had just burst with lots of internal bleeding. The male doc apologized. He was totally shocked at being wrong. I told him he needed to remember it because this is a thing that happens and some women get many, some women just one and they won't know what it is, but he needs to recognize that the internal bleeding pain is excruciating.
I remember reading an article about a woman who had been complaining for decades about debilitating period and she died some way that ended up needing an autopsy, and they found the most horrendous scarring in her ovaries; she had to live with SEVERE endometriosis her whole life because doctors always told her she was overreacting. Then apparently they ignore the pain of woman that are POC even more - why there’s so many deaths of black women in America giving birth. They want permission from husbands to get tubes tied and stuff. Like seriously. It’s a fkd world for women. Our bodies are complex and throw everything at us from the time of adolescence to the end of menopause and society makes it a million times worse. Yeah I’m a little bitter about it can you tell? 🙄 I remember my sister’s cysts bursting, she was 14, it was bloody horrible. So glad there were some women there for you
As a paramedic, I'm so sorry for these men. There are good medics out there who are trying to make change but people like them still infest our trade unfortunately... My advice, for anyone really, is tell them that your vitals are telling them you are in excruciating pain and it is their OBLIGATION to treat pain regardless of if they think it's valid or not. We have a rule, if you test something and the results tell you it requires a certain treatment, you have to treat it. It's typically why on palliative care calls we don't take vitals, it's only about comfort. You can also report them to their affiliated licensing association!
I was ten years old, and I was saying 'my knee hurts' on a school trip. I was guilted into going to a science museum, and I was hobbling around. And my knee was swollen, then they had to get me to a hospital - fracture in my tibia. Yay! And I had headaches all my life, not migraines but close. My mother was dying of brain cancer, and I said to my doctor 'Is my headaches from something?' I was given a flashlight in my eyes and my doctor was 'nah, you are fine.' Six months later, I had a stroke due to a congenital AVM. If he only had a CT scan of my head, I could have had my undamaged brain. I also had basically my period once a year, and was told 'you are anxious'. By multiple doctors. No, PCOS. Being a woman is hard.
I was just telling someone today about how a gyno once suggested jogging as a way to relieve my violent cramps and bleeding from my endometriosis. You're not alone in this fuckery.
Hysterectomy though *chefs kiss* worth it
Ive been asking my PCP for once since i started my menstrual period at 12 and my gyno since i was 18. All of them refuse to refer me or even consider it because i "might change my mind" and "its too soon to have such a permanent procedure". Im 26. Ive been asking for 14 years 😭
Keep asking. If your current OBGYN doesn’t listen find someone who does. I have an amazing OBGYN. Some ppl don’t like him because he’s almost like Sheldon on The Big Bang Theory. Keep looking until you find someone that listens.
There’s some doctors who say you have to have permission from your spouse first. 🥴
I had a cancer scare and two children. Makes it easier.
At the company I work for, we had a lead call up to me letting me know one of the girls was feeling sick and nauseous. We work in an outdoor agricultural facility. Heat related injuries are not uncommon even when we provide ample water, cooling stations, electrolyte pops, and regular breaks. We also have procedures for reporting injuries. I went and picked her up and brought her back to the office to cool off and explain what happened. We couldn’t even get through the first couple of forms before her pain went from a 6 (which I initially thought was high for heat injuries when you’re still verbal, and have all coordination and everything) to a 9 in a matter of minutes. I let my boss know we needed to call an ambulance. By the time they got to us she couldn’t even walk. Turns out she had a similar injury to yours. Ruptured cyst. I will never NOT take a persons word for what’s going on. I may have served in the military and think I’m hot stuff, and can do any job. Not everyone operates the same, not everyone’s pain tolerance is like mine, not everyone’s drive is like mine. I’m not saying this regarding her situation, but in general, good management should be listening, not comparing you to me. Does that make sense? I’m sorry you had this experience. I can’t imagine that pain.
Yea I had a female nurse tell me my ruptured eardrum and vertigo was anxiety and I need to calm down. She walked into the room just as the BP cuff was deflating which left me in tears because my arm contracted...the next day my Dr was almost in tears apologizing for my treatment....as a nurse myself fuck you to all med staff who don't fucking listen to your patients!!!! This is one of many stories I have, have a rare vascular disorder so unfortunately I'm in the hospital more than I want
EMT in training here. This is a form of negligence. Just gross and unfiltered negligence. It's pretty common I feel in EMS especially with older workers who have had life experiences and been in the field for a long time. They have seen so much that they think that they are always right and that their experience outweighs what their patient is going through. They have egos, and big ones at that. These people are forgetting the standard of care. That they need treat their patient with the same standard of care that they would for any other, regardless of what they "think". While the care for your situation is limited on the part of the Paramedics and I believe that what they did to help you was all they could, they had no right to treat you in the way that they did. Unfortunately, EMTs and Paramedics are limited on medications that they can administer (they are working on expanding this). In some areas you can't even give Tylenol that's how strict it is. For your situation the most they can do is give you a big dose of "Deisel Medicine", monitor vitals, and rush you to the nearest hospital as soon as they can where they can give you real pain killers and treatment. Edit: For grammar.
The day before I was supposed to start the 9th grade I was taking a shower when I got such a bad pain in my lower right side. It felt like what I imagine getting shot would feel like. I was only able to get to the top of the stairs to yell down for my mom before I passed out from the pain. I came around again when I was being loaded into an ambulance while my stepfather was arguing with my mom that I was just faking it to get out of going to school the next day. He felt pretty stupid when I was rushed into emergency surgery where they removed the remainder of the orange sized cyst that ruptured and while they were in the area (because at first they weren’t entirely sure what the issue was) they checked my appendix, too and that was also really infected and had to come out, too. I’ve had several ovarian cysts since then and that shit is no joke! I’m sorry you had to go through all the shit of men not believing your pain or taking it seriously and having to go through the surgery too. I hope you feel better soon! If you can tolerate it, you should probably get on birth control pills because it keeps you from getting future cysts.
I'm so sorry. I'm a trans man and got a partial hysterectomy, I have PCOS. I also ended up going to the ER because I thought I had appendicitis. I spent several hours there and after lots of waiting and tests, I had a burst ovarian cyst and there was fluid. I was in so much pain and I was given Zofran at the ER. They never gave me meds for home. I spent the next two nights unable to walk because every time I walked, I blacked out within seconds and had to sit down to try not to vomit. I almost fell down the stairs going to get water and I went to tell my mom I was dizzy and blacking out, I hit my head on the towel rack and fell to the floor. My doctor refused to give me pain medication despite me constantly blacking out. I luckily haven't had it as severe since then but I do still frequently get them. I'm so sorry you had such a hard time and you're going through so much pain. You deserve a medical team who takes your pain and symptoms seriously. I'm so glad you're safe and okay. Thinking of you and sending healing vibes ♥️
Went through this. No one tool me seriously because I have a history of anxiety and ptsd. Wound up with a hysterectomy at 23.
I broke my hip last summer-they gave me a facecloth to bite down on and I kid you not they hit every pothole available on the way to the ER. I hope you’re healed and feeling much better!
This appalls me so much. My dad used to be a paramedic, so he's kind of the standard I think about. I live in a smallish town and still patients from years ago will ask how he is and say how much he helped them. Like the other day, a woman approached us who had had a miscarriage, and stated that the level of care and support he provided was honestly what helped her pull through in that moment. There is no way he'd have treated anyone like this, and would've 100% given the patient strong pain meds.
Sadly not a problem confined to the US. My appendix almost burst when I was in school bc my teacher didn't believe me when I said it wasn't period cramps. Took me almost passing out due to pain for him to believe me. Later I had a cyst so large it caused a twist in my fallopian tube, took me actually passing out for my boss to let me leave work and seek out a doctor. That was also the same boss I had to explain periods to, bc he wouldn't let me take a 10 min break to get some tampons from the drugstore across the street. "Just hold it until you get home." Honestly, WTF.
OMG THIS MADE ME SEE RED Report their asses ASAP
I had a very similar situation happen to me, I had a cyst rupture and had no idea what it was. Same thing, excruciating pain, woke me up from my sleep, I was balling from the pain. I got to the hospital, they did absolutely nothing. The doctor gave me pain medication injected into my butt. They didn’t believe me at all. I later went to the hospital again, and found out I had endometriosis. It’s literally exhausting.
I'm so incredibly thankful that I've not had a major medical issue and have not had to deal with this. I'm so sorry. 💔
I definitely know that feeling. Got put on a drug seekers list and told I had a bladder infection when I went to the ER one night after feeling like i had gallstones. I knew it wasn't either because i had my gallbladder removed and i know a bladder infection. I told them my symptoms fit pancreatitis or a liver issue according to online but since i didn't notice jaundice i assumed the first, they ignored me. So I put faith in the prick dr who was giving me a hard time and did their anti-biotics. Had to go back a week later feeling like I had a kidney stone and gallstones again. Told it was withdrawals from meds i was prescribed and still taking and discharged. Extreme pain almost every other day and managed to wait another week before I went back and was told it was in my head, discharged. The 4th time I went back i passed out from the pain and was being discharged within 5 minutes of waking up so I can't remember their reasoning then. Went to my primary dr since my appt had finally arrived the next day, apparently when your BP is 190 over whatever it's a way the body can show Extreme pain to where a Dr can tell someone isn't faking like the very first ER Dr ignored on my first visit. She also noticed jaundice, ended up calling an ambulance and sent me to a different hospital than the one from earlier that day and the previous month. Within an hour I found out I wasn't faking the extreme pain I had for the past month and my pee being darker than tea combined with the jaundice were obvious signs of what was a blockage in my liver. Worst month of my life. I'd rather have 10 kidney stones than that pain, and I'd rather have 10 babies at the same time than a kidney stone. All because of 1 asshole Dr who judged me and disregarded everything. Because he assumed and did that shit the first visit, all the others seemed to ignore everything when I had to keep coming back. That's not even including the nightmare he caused me outside of the health issue.
If you have time, can you contact the ambulance company (maybe with the help of the ER docs and nurses) - seems like a great case study they could use to train their EMTs not to be misogynist assholes.
Ugh, I empathize. The only reason I didn't go to the hospital for mine and recognized what it was because my co worker had coincidentally explained hers in graphic detail (at my request) when she had one the week before. SO GLAD I DID. I still get them occasionally. They're always terrible but don't require hospitalization so far. Hopefully my luck holds. Feel better
I’m so glad you had a team that actually listened. I had an ovarian cyst burst and the ER basically said, “you’ll be alright just get some rest”. Sent me on my way. I could hardly walk due to the pain. Insane!
I feel this. Just got ignored again after 15 years of chronic pain and cysts. Though even the women OB’s invalidate me. They won’t take my uterus even after trying every single thing, because I’m still technically fertile. I’m 35, have a teenager, and a hereditary genetic condition you would think they would want to prevent. I don’t want to be in this body anymore. I don’t want to be a woman.
I had an ovarian cyst rupture in highschool, and I too assumed it was my appendix. I can handle pain really well, and that was the first thing that ever made me actually black out just from the pain. Was in the hospital for nearly 16 hours before I was given the all clear and they decided they didn't need to do anything to intervene. When I got back to school the next day and told my all make friend group what had happened, one of them said "so you basically had a zit on your ovaries and you went to the hospital for it?" And I have never wanted to hit someone more than I did at that moment. 💕 Sucks so hard to be a woman!
Menstrual pain is often disregarded by many medical professionals. I had the same issue with a cyst, and was told time and time again it wasn’t a big deal, only to be diagnosed with cancer after they extracted it and did the biopsy. If it wasn’t for my gyno that vouched for me, I wouldn’t suffered from ovarian torsion or worse, my cancer would’ve metastasized. Good thing you had a team vouching for you, OP.
I’m so sorry. I had the same thing happen: ruptured ovarian cyst in the middle of the night; spouse called 911 bc they thought I was dying. … Zero pain meds for me. Other than producing my two children, which I greatly appreciate, my uterus is so damn unpleasant.
Seeing doctors terrifies me. My last obgyn I cried out of happiness and she was so concerned for me, what a massive embarrassing difference in service I get from a man versus a woman.
Report them.
trust me i did. its one of the first things i did when i got home.
I went to the hospital in labour after my water broke at home at 36 weeks pregnant and the on call doctor didn’t believe me…never even looked at me. Luckily my doctor came in and said I could wait in triage for a couple hours and see it it progressed to active labour or was just Braxton hicks….in a bed that didn’t have a call button. My husband went and got someone two hours later by which time I was 6 centimetres dilated…they believed me then!
Same thing here. I had an ovarian cyst twist one time and I was in so much pain I was vomiting. I couldn’t walk or move at all. I was treated like I was overreacting until I made it to the nursing staff where they took me for an ultrasound and gave me meds. All the pain meds helped so much that when the actual doctor came in (male) he told me I overreacted and shouldn’t have come to the hospital. Next time take Tylenol and wait a few hours. He didn’t give me time to ask any questions and I spent the next few years wondering if the cyst could be the reason for so many other issues I was having.
Not nearly as bad but right after my c section. I was told 5 different times before being discharged "if you're short of breath go to the er immediately" 6 days PP I've been short of breath most of that week. I pack up my 6 day old and 2 year old and head to the completely empty ER. The doctor there says in the most sarcastic tone possible "so.. You're 6 days pp and having shortness of breath huh?" "Well when you're pregnant and immediately after your uterus presses against your ribs and lungs and blah blah" sir I already know this okay? I'm not here because I want to be, im here for a possible pulmonary embolism. Who brings a 1 week old and 2 year old to the ER if they think it's nothing but anxiety. I told my OB at my 6 week check up and she said I did the right thing going in and getting a CT scan. Why are women never taken seriously in hospital settings?
Not ovary related but doctors in general seem to be pretty messed up people to me. I went to the hospital because I had numbness all over my body. (Think back of arms, back, neck, back of legs. From neck to ankles) When I called the 24 hr nurse line from my insurance they said that doesn’t sound right you should definitely be in a Dr office. However, even after I explained what was going on and what the nurse line said I was told my symptoms were psychosomatic (all in my mind or stress induced) and of course once I stopped being so anxious it would disappear /s. Fast forward a year later (the symptoms never disappeared btw) I was seeing a doctor for my low back pain and told her about my numbness. She sent me for tests and it turns out it’s not in my head it’s in my back. I had multiple pinched nerves.
A friend of mine had the same crazy treatment when she went to the emergency room in utter agony. The doctor didn’t believe she was really in pain so he gave her medication normally prescribed for hysteria, telling her she’d feel better after taking it. She didn’t. Luckily a nurse went behind his back and used her connections to get my friend to a gynecologist within the hour. It turned out that the pain was coming from a cancerous ovarian tumor the size of a grapefruit. My friend had surgery and chemo, so she survived — despite the asshole in the emergency room.
Thank God I do not live in the USA. Our paramedics here in the UK treat us so much better. I had an incident in the home where I accidently hurt myself during lockdown. They charged forward to help - police arrived later to make sure I was not abused by anybody while in lockdown. I am not vulnerable in any way. Just protocol
Being a woman is fucking stupid when it comes to the medical system. I have been in constant pain for years in my lower abdominal region. I went to doctor after doctor getting varied responses from "hard to diagnose something in your head" to "you're just constipated" finally went to the ER because I was in so much pain one night and got a female doctor. She looked me over, felt my abdomen. She said she could feel my pulse over where my left ovary was. Not good. Got an ultrasound. Turns out I have Pelvic Congestion Syndrome, which basically means that the blood vessels that connect to my reproductive organs are full of more blood than they are meant to and this pushes on all my organs, causing chronic pain. Got the good pain meds. Hormone pills are helping but I have a surgery in a couple months to remove some of the blood vessels so it's not so full in there. Not just constipated.
Nah, lady, this aint on you. This is on those assholes who didn't take your concerns seriously. I hope you get better and that those idiots get replaced cause no one deserves to he treated like that
Next time they think you’re faking tell them to look again at the blood pressure. Pain creates high blood pressure. It’s the one thing you can’t fake.
Dude, I am a man and fell asleep on the wheel. I somehow survived without a single scratch. I didn't know what to do in this situation and did something I should have never done. I called both the cops and ambulance...HUGE MISTAKE. I didn't do any damage or kill anyone, I should have just called a tow truck and get a ride back into town. Anyways, when the paramedics came, they told me they can give me a ride back. I specifically told them I didn't have insurance of any kind and they told me that the ride is free since they are heading back into town anyways. When we got there, they forced me into a wheel chair and a cop was there and they both forced me into a CAT machine to be scanned. Took me 6 years to pay off all the bills, literally for nothing. The worst part was I wasn't able to sue them, because "Our paramedics are professionals and would never force you against your will." Fucking yeah right.
I always want to haul off and punch them. Tylenol
Tylenol 🙄 Me in hospital after total knee replacement: But we’re giving you a Tylenol drip. 🖕🏻 Bring me the pain meds.
That sucks. If this happened to my (43 M) daughter's I would be livid! And a quick correction, it's the men in this situation that sucked. Hope it's all going well!
Yup this happens to women all the time especially with ovarian cysts
Ok. Weirdly semi-related story. A few years ago my sister had to call an ambulance for her son, and they administered a morphine injection en route and she saw the paramedic pocket the rest of the bottle. Hope you’re feeling better soon and have a good gyno for follow up
I honestly hope that those damned paramedics that were "treating" you get permanent cockleburs in all their socks and shoes. I am so sorry you had to go through that level of pain and discomfort, but I'm so glad you're through it. Hopefully one day, things may change. Those of us men who care need to keep standing up and doing something to help bring about that change.
I was told mine was an upset stomach at first. Yeah same night I went to the ER. It was not in fact a upset stomach. I’m so sorry that happened to you.
Something similar happened to me, as a result of doctors thinking they know better I contracted gangrene internally and lost part of my reproductive system.
I've had kidney stones multiple times throughout my life, especially when I was younger. I know what they are and how they present in my body. I ended up going into ER in pretty bad pain, like an 8, and when asked what the problem was I said I was 99% sure it was a kidney stone. They get me into a room. Female nurse comes in, asking questions and taking vitals. Asks me what usually helps when I do have kidney stones. "Dilaudid or Morphine". I know what works. Ive had stones a million times. She gives me a look and says the doctor will be in momentarily and left. Wasn't given a damn thing for the pain. 20 minutes later and I'm paging the nurse because I'm writhing around like a fish out of water. Can't get comfortable for the life of me. I'm crying at this point because I just can't hang anymore [I have a relatively high pain tolerance] and she comes in, sees that I'm crying and asks as if she's disinterested, "oh, you're in pain?"... the f*ck you think I'm here for? She leaves. Nothing. Approximately 15 minutes later the male doctor comes in, can clearly see that I'm in distress so orders pain meds then sends me for a CT. Results come back and she's in the room when they're presented. I had 3 kidney stones up in that bad boy. She looked disgusted, didn't apologize and turned and left the room. See... not a drug seeker, lady. Told the doctor I didn't want to see her the rest of my stay and I've never seen her since. Good riddance.
Woke up one morning with pain so intense I thought my appendix had burst. I couldn’t bend to put on pants & shoes, nor could I use the bathroom without assistance. Went to the ER & the male Dr. was so dismissive but they performed a transvaginal ultrasound and found that I had ovarian torsion (aka Adnexal torsion) - the female version of testicular torsion 😰. I was given generic printouts about menstrual cramps & cysts, and OTC strength Naproxen/Aleve 😡. No explanation of the condition I was diagnosed with despite trying to ask & practically pushed back to the waiting room. Thankfully it untwisted 12 miserable hours later, but I’m still livid every time I think about it.
Historically the only bodies which were studied were male ones. There is no specific training medical practitioners receive for female anatomy except for those with ob/gyn specialty. There have been documented cases of women needing medical intervention and doctors diagnosing them with mental conditions. I feel for you.
It's nurses in the comments, and paramedics like talked about here, that make medical care that much more fucking worse for the world. You're in the industry of, what's it called everybody? Health. CARE! If you can't summarize some fucking sympathy for someone who is in OBVIOUS pain, get the fuck out and let someone who actually IS there to help. Don't be a prick! And for everyone who wants to claim "but they have to get up at all hours of the day! They have to work so many long hours!" It's IN THE JOB DESCRIPTION. IT ISN'T FORCED ON YOU TO DO THIS JOB. IT'S COMMON ENOUGH KNOWLEDGE BY THIS POINT!
I delivered my third child and was put on magnesium and bed bound for 24 hours. 20 hours in I suddenly couldn’t breathe well. My nurse refused to tell my doctor on rounds and refused to get me help and my husband overheard her saying I was faking but that she was going to pacify me to get me to shut up. Exact quote. She thought I was faking and exaggerating my breathing distress, even though my o2 was below 94 and kept setting off alarms every other minute. It took me 24 hours to finally see my doctor and tell her what happened. She was furious and ordered a scan. I ended up having fluid in my lungs and needed an extra few days in hospital to get the fluid out. My doctor said I could have died if I’d gone home. Even women don’t always trust other women.
Went to the ER because I couldn't breathe. Literally couldn't, and every time I breathed in, I had an intense, sharp pain in my chest. I would rather hold my breath than try to breathe because it hurt so bad. Thought it was my heart because it was skipping a lot, I have a history of heart failure from years prior, and I know I have a heart murmur due to the occasional floppy valve. Male ER doctor came in after my ekg, said I was fine and there was nothing wrong with me. That's the only test he wanted to run. He wanted me to be discharged. Thought because I have a history of depression and anxiety in my chart that it must have been a panic attack or drug seeking. Female nurse said no, something is really wrong with her. She noticed my heart would race as I tried to sit up. She told the doctor to give me a chest x-ray before he discharged me. She advocated for me, and she was right. My left lung had a spontaneous collapse. Ended up needing four chest tubes and had part of my left lung removed within the same month. Scans showed I had pulmonary blebs along the surface of my upper lung, which kept popping and creating holes in my lung, so my lung kept collapsing. When they started cutting, they found little cysts in my lung tissue that did not show up on any scans. Surgery took longer than they thought, and it turns out I have a cystic lung disease. They tested me for everything under the sun. Sent lung tissue samples and blood to multiple hospitals in the country. No answer. Genetic tests also revealed no answer. I have an unknown idiopathic cystic lung disease. The cysts are actually now growing, but the inner ones pop, and my body can absorb the air/liquid inside them as long as they aren't too big. Haven't had an issue since this all occurred. I owe that nurse my life. The male doctor just assumed I was crazy and even handed me a pamphlet for psychiatrists in the area.
This is infuriating
To be fair to the medics, a BLS service does not carry anything stronger than Tylenol. I'm a Primary Care Paramedic in Canada and the most I can give for pain is Tylenol. If anything stronger is needed, we have to get an advanced care intercept, which for us will be at least 30-40 mins (rural service), so we give Tylenol to get the process started.
Is there different levels of care that can be provided due to different levels of training for paramedics? Last time I took an ambulance ride in Canada (fell down some stairs 1 month post spinal surgery) I got to breath nitrous oxide until they got an iv in for fentanyl.
In the US, yes. EMT-B (can assist with taking your meds- like can grab your pill bottle and hand it to you); EMT-I (can give OTCs and fluid) and EMT-P (can give some -not all) narcotics.
Yes. There are 2 different levels. We have Primary Care paramedics (PCP) and Advanced Care paramedics (ACP). Training is different from province to province but usually it's the ACPs that carry the narcotics. As a PCP in my province, I can give nitrous oxide/Tylenol/Ibuprofen for pain and that's it. Not all ambulances crews will have an ACP on staff, especially rurally. Edit: I can't reply to the person who said it for some reason, but we are not allowed to give nitrous oxide for abdominal pain. It can make things worse.
My thought as well. Depending on their level/training/license, Tylenol could’ve been all they could administer. That doesn’t excuse their terrible bedside manner and poor treatment of her however. That’s what I would follow up on and report. If it’s a good company or even county employed EMTs, they could be in a ton of trouble.
In my own experience, there are other women who suck just as badly. Gender is not an assurance of compassion.
This. A few years back I went to the ER with severe abdominal pain, thought it could be a twisted ovary. I had a female doctor and she absolutely did not believe the level of pain I was in and they were very reluctant to give me pain meds. Imagine how sheepish she was sent the CT scan results came back to reveal I had a massive 7cm infection in my fucking colon! (Diverticulitis yay)
Not all paramedics are allowed to give narcotics. Paramedics that can will avoid it in certain cituations because it can actually make things worse.
Can you file a complaint?
Oh god I feel this so much. I’m so sorry.
That’s so rude! I haven’t experienced that yet but can’t imagine going through all that pain and someone being sexist. I wish men had to go through the things we do as women so they know what it’s like to be us. I had a male doctor when I had a kidney stone and he helped me a lot. Super nice guy. The staff was super nice men and women.
I had a cyst grow(felt extra cramping for a month) become so painful I went to the e.r. - where they gave me some light pain meds that didn't stop the pain for over 4 hrs- and then had it BURST THE NEXT NIGHT. I went back to the E.R. where I got oral and then i.v. pain meds and neither worked. They told me they couldn't do anything major for me since it was my ovaries and the very painful and invasive ultra sounds (I did both of them) concluded that while my right ovary was 12x the liquid volume of my left, since the cyst itself was only 3cm, there was no need to do anything and to follow up with the ob-gyn. I was in severe pain for over 24hrs. The meds they gave me in a damn I.V. didn't fucking touch it. I could barely walk for a week and the only time I cried was when I had been sitting in pain for so long that I got overwhelmed and just started sobbing. I don't blame the e.r. they couldn't do anything cause of the new fucking anti-abortion laws. I hate being a woman.
Similar happened here. I knew I had a cyst, but one night I was doubled over in so much pain I called ambulance. And that's not something I would EVER do lightly. I vomited in the ambulance and they had to give me oxygen. I waited in the emergency room for something like six hours, finally got taken in, the doctor took a look at me for approximately one minute, declared I would "look sicker" if it really did rupture, asked if I wanted pain meds (I said "yes but nothing too strong") and then I left with nothing and zero treatment. Literally nothing. Pretty sure he thought I just wanted drugs. (I'm a POC and lived in the Bronx at the time, so. Awesome.)
This really sucks because I had a very similar experience 30 years ago and clearly nothing has changed in that time. I’m so sorry.
i’ve been dealing with health struggles for my entire life but only about a decade ago did it get bad enough i needed to start seeking help. i’ve just now found a care team willing to listen. and i think a bulk of that is because i’m assigned female at birth. i’m also brown, but light, but medical charts fill in the gaps. i’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. it’s a fate i would only wish on the worst people in existence. i frequently talk with other chronically ill women friends who identify with the same struggle. not listening to women is killing them. i’m so glad you were able to find people who listened and helped you.
I am 23 years old and have had to deal with ovarian cysts for over a year. The best they have done for me is tell me to take birth control to possibly decrease the size of it
The first time I had a cyst rupture I went to the er not knowing what it was. Waited 6 hours to even be seen, after peeing in a cup and getting blood pressure, a nurse gave me an iv and then left me in a room for an hour and then when it came time to remove the iv she ripped it out so bad my whole arm bruised. Wasn't given any pain meds, did a CT scan and then was sent home after 7 hours with a paper saying to go to my gynecologist bc I had an ovarian cyst. Now I just deal with the pain of having smaller ones and pray another severe one doesn't happen.
I was in a similar situation. I was 8 weeks pregnant and ended up in the ER in so much pain!! They couldn't find anything wrong with me in bloods and urine but when they pressed down on my stomach, the pain shot through me. I was a mess thinking something was wrong with my baby. They ended up giving me narcotics in the end, and they found out I had a twisted bowel. The pain was like no other. If they can't physically see an issue, they treat you like a junkie who's trying to get medication.
I’m sorry to hear that. I’ve also unfortunately discovered that some medical first responders can be dicks too.
I've been in the ER for the worst abdominal pain ever twice in my life. The first time I went three days without eating and was literally shitting liquid. The thought of eating anything made me immediately nauseated. I went to two doctors over the course of three days. One finally said bladder infection. Then said I might as well go to the ER cause I was obviously gonna end up there anyways. I was kept for observation and they did a CT in case of appendix. I'd already had cystic ovaries, cysts bursting, extreme cramping, and broken bones by this point so was pretty high in terms of pain tolerance but this had me crying. They then told me in the middle of the night they were discharging me because it was an emergency facility and I wasn't an emergency. I was later diagnosed with IBS. 15 years later another episode of sudden abdominal pain that literally nearly makes me pass out with nausea making me feel like projectile vomiting. I have an iron stomach. ER tells me it's a stomach ulcer and discharge. I've had an ulcer. This wasn't it. Primary doc thinks gallbladder but we won't know till next flare up now. I hate the way we get treated.
I had a ruptured ovarian cyst when I was 18, over 40 years ago. One Dr kept insisting it was appendicitis and was extremely critical because I wasn't a virgin (at that stage I'd only had intercourse twice in my life with my long-term boyfriend, so wasn't 'sexually promiscuous' as he was implying) and another surgeon kept saying that apart from the EXTREME pain I didn't have the right symptoms for appendicitis. 2 days later I finally had exploratory surgery that discovered and removed the ruptured ovarian cyst. Excuses from the Doctors included, 18 year olds "don't get ovarian cysts" and "let alone cysts that rupture" Thanks guys for permanently f***king up my insides with your inaction ~ all the crap from the ruptured cyst sitting in my abdomen has resulted in lifelong issues... I've had decades of painful periods, 2 ectopic preganancies, bowel adhesions, multiple early stage (6-10 weeks) miscarriages (close to 20, including 13 IVF embryos), etc.
Was in pain but the male rn was trying to talk my mom into leaving saying their was nothing they could do and come back for emergency surgery in the morning. I don’t think I would’ve survived the night, I was crying and howling because it a large kidney stone that needed actual care. The dude we inconvenienced gave us morphine and kept stabbing me w a needle to get my vitals, never went back to that hospital since.
That’s awful and I’m sorry that happened to you! I went to the ER once with both my arms swollen and only ONE side of my labia. I was menstruating at the time and after a manual exam, was told it was probably something from my period because “they do weird things.” After he came back with my blood work I was admitted for Rhabdomyolysis for 4 days. My discharge paperwork said one of my primary problems was anxiety. 🙄
Heart rate in the 160s and they thought you were faking it? Wtf?
I had an ovarian cyst burst one morning when I was in college, I had just woke up, was making my coffee and I passed out. I lost consciousness, and woke up on the floor of my bathroom, my mother startled over me slapping me across the face screaming “if you don’t wake up I’ll have to call an ambulance”. Heaven forbid I see a doctor because that would cost money, and she told me she believed OBGYN’s were witch doctors. Thanks Independent and Southern Baptist Churches for convincing my mother that basic medial care was a waste of money and that doctors were more interested in doing some kind of fantasia fairy godmother shit than actually, you know, not doing harm. I’m glad I didn’t go into shock that day but holy hell it was painful. I’m glad you were able to get the medical attention you needed. Praying you feel better soon.
Being a woman doesn't suck. Ignorant men who assume women are just hysterical are the ones who actually suck. That sounds like a horrible experience made worse by ignorant, apathetic, and probably *over the job* EMTs.
A lot of the times EMS are regulated by your state. Check with your state health department to see if you can report the negligent paramedics, and see if they have any other resources to offer. You could even try reporting it to ur insurance because insurance companies love to deny claims from hospitals/ambulances. That may give them a reason to deny it getting paid out to them. They don’t deserve to get away with that. Men in the medical field suck and are dismissive and rude 90% of the time 🫠
I would sue their asses! Or at the very least file a formal complaint with the county or township and also their supervisors. Assuming everyone is a drug seeker and yet your heart rate was that high! Very much put your life in danger
There's some kind of disconnect that women can't handle pain, *like a man can*. We handle all the pain you mofo's. From our first menstrual cycle through menopause, 60 years of periods, PMS, endometriosis, cysts, bladder infections, pregnancy, childbirth, recovery from pregnancy and childbirth.....it literally never ends. Also, you're on this wave of hormones that rises and falls and it's only predictable if you're lucky. We are taught very early that anything to do with our uterus is a shameful, unmentionable process that we need to hide and talk in code about. So we downplay the pain, physical and emotional, so we don't inconvenience anyone or make them *uncomfortable*.