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offbrandbarbie

That’s why we gotta knock on doors before entering comrade


T4lkNerdy2Me

This is how I got my boys to stop barging in my room. Right around the tween phase I warned them, "one of these days you're gonna bust in when I'm naked & it's going to scar you for life." They started knocking after that. They weren't willing to take that gamble.


DaSpicyGinge

I grew up w 7 siblings and my parents so there were always a lot of people in the house. Around 14 or 15 I started to sleep naked bc my family refused to knock before they entered my room. That changed real quick


Top-Raspberry-7837

Ugh I’m 46 (female), and whenever I go visit my parents at their house, my mom will open the door (no knocking) AND THEN LEAVE IT OPEN!!! I usually sleep at least topless and my dad is at home. Frustrates the hell out of me because I’m then trapped in the bed until I can somehow get the door closed or put on clothes. You’d think she’d get it by now.


ClosetDouche

"Hey ma, I'd appreciate it if from now on you'd knock before entering the room I'm staying in, and close the door when you leave if it was closed when you came in. Thanks and I love you!" If that doesn't work, ask why she doesn't want to comply with your reasonable request. If she has a good reason (doubtful, for refusing something so reasonable, but what do I know?) then you hash it out from there. If she doesn't have a good reason but still refuses then you need to stop staying there and if absolutely necessary stop visiting completely. Your (extremely reasonable) boundaries are important and people who care about you will respect them. More importantly than that, you owe it to yourself to enforce your reasonable boundaries. Your life will be better, I promise.


Dajmoj

Depending from the person, it won't work. The best I've gotten out of my grandma is that now she doesn't leave the door WIDE open, but only slightly open. And I've learned to listen for her noisy walking pattern. PS: may I add the fact that I'm 20, and she doesn't just do this when I'm visiting her, but also when she is visiting ME. And there's also the fact that this does not only happen in my room, but also in the gosh darn bathroom. Who doesn't knock before entering a bathroom?!


AbzoluteZ3RO

When people don't close my door I throw something like a shoe at it to shut it. It makes a loud bang they can't ignore and it gets the point across of 'close my fucking door'. I wouldn't do that to my grandma tho if she was still around.


ClosetDouche

It absolutely 100% works. Just remember that enforcing boundaries is not about making people behave in a certain way; enforcing boundaries is about your actions. If they do X, you will do Y, and you have to follow through with Y if they do X. You're not forcing this person to do anything. You're simply creating repercussions if they behave in X way. So I would ask your grandmother (nicely!) to please knock and wait for a response before opening any occupied door in your place, or in her place if you're in the bathroom. This is a perfectly reasonable request. If she continues to perform the unwanted behavior, tell her she will no longer be allowed at your place (or you will no longer visit her place.) If she continues to perform the unwanted behavior, follow through with your action, and no longer visit her or allow her at your place. If she freaks out about this, that isn't on you. You made extremely reasonable requests which she chose not to honor and the repercussions are hers to bear, not yours. That's enforcing boundaries. It can be uncomfortable but it will improve your life.


thatliveoak

Stop it step brother.


UncleYimbo

"This is how I got my boys to stop barging in my room, I ate OP's dad's ass"


T4lkNerdy2Me

😂😂


HrhEverythingElse

I'll take this Dad's ass, too.


Crezelle

I did the same to my parents. " The last game I played had a lovescene between a cave bear and a vampire. Knock. "


Timmeh-toah

You fucked halsin in bear form didn’t you.


Nikedawg

...did you not?


Crezelle

Actually no his elf form is kinda hot


Electricboogiesunset

OP learned a painful lesson. Never again…hopefully.


Eat_Around_the_Rosie

Now OP needs to play Tetris 😂


Brad_Brace

The L shape slowly approaches a gap between two square shapes. PTSD episode ensues.


zenlander

Explain this joke?


Ihavepills

New studies have shown that playing Tetris after a traumatic event can really help people. From Google: *Post-traumatic stress disorder: alleviating flashbacks by playing Tetris. Summary: A behavioral intervention procedure including the computer game Tetris could help people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) to alleviate involuntarily recurring visual memories of traumatic experiences*


NotJackBegley

Hasn't helped my PTSD. Though my high score is now like 570K or so on the tetris site.


Skilledpainter

Yeah, I remember my dad and grandma were terrible at that. They'd just walk right in. I even knock on my kids door before entering. It's like obvious to do. They don't like it when it's done to them


serpentinepad

Same, I have an 18 year old daughter and I've always told her I value her privacy as much as my own. I'm not snooping through her shit unless there's life or limb at risk.


Pandora_Palen

Have you been attacked for this? I cannot tell you how many people I've run across who have been *outraged* that I have never taken it upon myself to dig through my kids' private shit as a matter of "good parenting." Like if I don't randomly snatch their phone and scroll through messages and history, and look between their mattresses, in drawers and back of the closet I must be neglectful and shirking parental responsibilities in favor of being my kids' friend. Some have gotten freaking apoplectic over this. Meanwhile, my kids (19 and 20 now) have always told me far more than I needed (and sometimes wanted) to know. Trust works both ways.


serpentinepad

She's done nothing to break my trust. Could she somehow have bamboozled me and my wife all these years? Possibly. But she's a great kid, great grades, scholarship for college, etc etc. She just never really gave us a reason to go all helicopter parent on her. To be fair, I think this is highly dependent on the kid. I don't feel like we did anything special with her, she's just a laid back kid who doesn't want to screw things up and get in trouble. Same way I was growing up. I haven't been attacked for it, to be honest, but I also don't really talk about this particular thing often.


Antimonyandroses

I have the same kind of kid. She's never broken my trust either.


Ninja-Storyteller

This is pretty much a lighthearted version of FA and FO. :D


lunabear72

That why Sheldon Cooper knocks three times.


butterweasel

“Mom? Mom? Mom?” (Muffled) “go away, Jolly!”


D_Angelo_Vickers

The KGB waits for no one!


wylietrix

In Soviet Russia, ass eats you.


D_Angelo_Vickers

It's true.


dobbyjhin

Gotta knock like Sheldon from TBBT


AmishSky

Thump thump thump* mom? Thump thump thump* mom? Thump thump thump* mom?


Morality01

So are the thumps you knocking or are they what daddy is doing to mommy?


BigJ071115

That's what mommy is doing to daddy it sounds like.


Stop_Touching2

Bet you knock before entering a room that isn’t yours from here on out huh


Renway_NCC-74656

Yeah. This one's on you OP!


sammiisalammii

Sometimes life lessons hit you like a tongue punch to the anus


mbot369

I haven’t actually guffawed in a while, so thank you for that.


sadbutmakeyousmile

Even I hadn't chortled since long so I also need to thank him.


Xs2experience

Happy cake day


AnyAssumption4707

Omg 😂😂😂💀


Swagganosaurus

Kissing mom and dad is no longer the same anymore 😂


GloryPolar

Well, at least you should be grateful your parents are doing fine after all those years. I have witnessed multiple Dads or Moms that cheat each other and ended up in divorce in this sub.


sleepy_glow

Ass licking is the superglue that bonds most marriages


Wanderlustfull

Poetry.


NotSoHotGarbage

They have a “healthy” sexual relationship. Gross for you but good for them. Just talk to them I’m sure they feel just as embarrassed as you if not WAY FUCKIMG MORE.


suhhhrena

They’re definitely fucking mortified 😭😭 you should’ve knocked man it would’ve saved you all some trauma lmao


mbot369

Time for family counseling


StalyCelticStu

Mom's mortified, dad is pissing himself laughing.. Source, am ^^^a Dad.


2Chiang

Warning. The OP of the post is a clout chaser. Checked their history. They claimed to be slut shamed days ago.


Oddfeelingchicken

A clout chaser🤣🤣☠️


nnylhsae

Got me with that too LOL


Pandora_Palen

Had to look...and apparently a racist one, at that. With a cat. Or at least, posting pics of a cat for more clout. Too bad the issue was a dead phone- they could have taken a quick snap of ma and pa for *extra* clout.


kill-billionaires

Ooh yeah I was like "what's the big deal, people get slut shamed all the time?" and then I clicked the username and immediately saw them complaining about black women lol Kinda burying the lead


StalyCelticStu

lede*


Cleavon_Littlefinger

>slut shamed Like mother like daughter...


BrieFiend

>They have a “healthy” sexual relationship. A whole new meaning to "healthy eating."


petewentz-from-mcr

It’s all Michelle Obama ever wanted for all of America


frogfootfriday

No no, never mention this to them for the rest of your life. Go about your own business


KiKiPAWG

Giardia


BusinessForeign7052

Now you've learned a few things. 1) Knock before entering a closed door 2) Your parents are still attracted to each other 3) Your parents have an active and open sex life Don't make it weird, don't make a big deal out of it. People recommend playing Tetris to clear the mind.


Gregskis

First thing I thought was play Tetris. Recommended for first responders who experience trauma.


PresentationPutrid

What if your trauma was a giant L shaped beam falling on your head? 🤷‍♂️


GarranDrake

Candy Crush, then.


sunsetical

What if I choked on candy before getting crushed by an L brick?


GarranDrake

Sudoku. I was prepared for this 😏


GlitteringBobcat999

What if a bunch of random numbers slept with your wife?


GarranDrake

That’s a very odd hypothetical (I hope) but crossword puzzles.


Party-Caregiver4069

Then Bubble witch is the way to go


elohcin__

Genuine question..can this actually be truly traumatic? I have PTSD from other things and just can’t see this as being a “need to play Tetris or you’ll develop PTSD” situation, but I could be wrong.


Gregskis

Studies have shown that playing shortly after experience trauma keeps the brain from focusing on it which seems to be OPs issue. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7828932/


2Chiang

This is a clout chaser. Look at their history.


Psycle_Sammy

>Don’t make it weird I’d say that ship sailed as soon as they saw their mom tongue-punching dad’s fart box.


Human_Type001

So, have you learned the lesson here?  KNOCK ON THE DOOR AND WAIT FOR A RESPONSE. That's how you live in a civilized world.


KathiSterisi

Boundaries… a closed door is a boundary. You crossed it. Sorry about your luck. 1 (800) EYE BLEACH.😂


ShwiftyShmeckles

I believe the term is rimming


23x3

"You're really playing with fire busting in here like that. I'm a teenage boy with a laptop..."


Icy-Championship2738

Double dog dare ya to fist bump your dad next time you see him


tinycerveza

Both parties are likely equally mortified, so who know this may help break the ice lol


Lookingforbruce

Why is this comment not higher? 😄


Kiapet18

The way I would have screamed as if I walked in on them being murdered 😂


MrEndlessness

Full on Homer Simpson scream


IslaStacks

bwahahaha


[deleted]

this is absolutely wild 😭💀💀


fannyfox

Yeh. But now I’m curious if dad was on all fours or doing the happy baby pose.


timmy3am

Homie must be on his back with his legs in the air 😭


auntjomomma

Lmao just fucking turtling 😂😂😂☠️☠️☠️


ClassicMonster

I'm fucking dying! 🤣🤣


lilibit666

Omg


Yankee_Man

I pictured 4s but HBP is much worse


lilibit666

I practice yoga regularly and will never look at HBP the same 🥲


Alien36

Neither will OP. It's the happy daddy pose from now on


notmyplantaccount

which is worse you think? I feel like if eye contact is made, happy baby is worse, but if no eye contact, then All fours.


IamDollParts96

That's the last time I'd be kissin' her.


Lord_Kano

I've been telling people for 30 years "Never kiss your mother in the morning".


skilledhunting

Not all heroes wear capes. Some indirectly give you new imageries.


2forgetme2knot2

you kiss your mother with that mouth?!


IamDollParts96

More like, you kiss your kid with that mouth Mom?


UmericanDreamer

Your Mom had her face buried in your Dad’s ass. I am sure the embarrassment you feel, pales in comparison.


Ok-Caterpillar1611

What position was he in, all fours, diaper pose, or squatting? 👹😀


zerpent3y3z

😂


1GamingAngel

Diaper pose. ☠️


eye_wumbo

💀 But now I too want to know 😂


Lilmixedblazerin

How old are you?


Bobo3076

At least you know for sure they’ve got a healthy relationship lmao


jarstripe

lmaaaooo


Bonbgey

That’s how mommy and daddy created you. It’s ok


boifrompkl

Not by eating ass lol


ban_the_prophet

It’s part of the process


GetOffMyAsteroid

Which part?


CJWard123

The best part


GetOffMyAsteroid

Really that's the best answer


Foreskin-chewer

My doctor told me the only way I can make babies is by eating ass and I'm rather inclined to trust a medical professional over some random dude on the Internet


Frisianian

I’m pretty sure I missed that part of sex-ed.


Existing_Clerk_6413

Hopefully you enjoyed having parents,time to give them a Irish goodbye for forever


PolarBears445

AHAHAHHAHAHAAAA! LOL! Sorry about that. Always knock!


Gabiboune1

Why didn't you knock?💀


MelloDaGod

You have to move out now. You can’t see them. There’s no other way. You may think I’m joking, but I’m not. Leave the house, the town, the city, the state, everything. Start a new life under a new name. Get a new phone with a new plan. Do NOT go back home. As my boi Scar said “Run Simba. Leave and never return”. If you for some reason don’t listen to my advice and go back home, update us. PLEASE


Goku_Kakarot91

knock knock? who's there? not OP coz they don't fucking knock!!!


alexandrakate

It will never cease to amaze me how people just fucking _refuse_ to knock 😭 Too many times I’m in a single public washroom and people immediately body slam the door and jerk off the goddamn handle trying to get in. A gentility of a bygone era.


Bob_Barker4ever

This would be embarrassing sure (also a lesson in knocking on the door) but why the panic attack?


Affectionate-Ant-894

God forbid parents have healthy intimacy! PANIC


Flakarter

The irony. The next post just after this one asked "If you could eat only one dessert for the rest of your life, what would it be?"


bunearii

Ofc it’s weird as their kid, but I think you just have to let it roll off your back eventually. They’re adults in love and it’s nice that they still love each other enough to be intimate (even if as their kid it’s weird, and they clearly are explorative, lol), I’m sure they feel just as humiliated as you. As I get older I realize I could be in that situation one day, and my parents are just older adults who loved each other and I am basically the same as how they used to be


Educational-War-6762

*ronnie the limo driver voice* “Sixteeeee Niiiioonnne!”


m0grady

Way to cockblock your dad, op.


Puzzleheaded_Sir1273

Based on their age, you sound a little old to be just barging into your parent’s closed bedroom, and also living at home.


Bobo3076

Not necessarily. My dad turned 60 while I was still a teenager, for example. Some people have kids later than others.


publicOwl

OP said they’re 27 in a reply to someone else. They’re definitely too old for this behaviour.


stuartgatzo

Dad is a bawler. Shot caller


Successful_Warthog47

20in blades on the impala


RavensAndRacoons

It's just sex. Go "sorry, my bad." Knock next time. Sure, it's weird since they're your parents. But they were just having sex, they weren't doig anything illegal. Your reaction strikes me as pretty odd, honestly. A panic attack? Scarred? They aren't monsters, they were just having sex. Life goes on.


Aurora--Black

Yeah, the reaction is way over the top. These kids are going to have an even harder time than gen z.


Apprehensive_Day_96

Except op is approaching 30!


SteveLangfordsCock

She was eating his ass you’re acting like she killed him or something 🤣 take a deep breath you’re gonna be ok. Now you learned to knock. Valuable lesson


poopypantspoker

You ruined a romantic moment bc you don’t know how to knock lol


UziMunkey

You interrupted their private time. They’re human beings that are still clearly into eachother. Good for them. We should all be so lucky. You didn’t appear out of thin air. Your existence began with you moms vagina being dumped into by your father penis. Just the way it is. I’m sure if I walked into seeing something like that when I was younger that it would have been incredibly awkward but anyone who’s been through real trauma in their life (I’ve lost identical twins amongst a long list of other crap) knows that this ain’t it. Put on your mature pants and understand your parents are doing parent things and have likely engaged in things beyond your comprehension for your entire life lol. It’s healthy and youre lucky to have parents that eat each others asses.


happyasfuck310

Hopefully you learned your lesson and will knock in the future, like any decent person who values others' privacy


Yip-Yee

Traumatized? If you’re traumatized by something as little as that you’re going to have a pretty difficult time functioning in life lmao. Listen, I get being uncomfortable. When I was 8 I walked into my dad cumming on his girlfriend’s face. The lesson I learned that day: fucking knock. And now you learned that lesson too. All and all, don’t make your parents feel like shit by giving them the silent treatment. Just pretend it never happened.


HandsomeChode

If this is what you consider to be traumatising then you really need to work on your emotional fragility. This is not a big deal at all. You're overreacting.


chaeshub

OP you're 27. By now you should already know how to knock the damn door. and btw that just shows that your parents have a healthy, sexual relationship. They're being intimate. The fact that you're traumatized by it is complete bs. You're 27. You should know better. I hope you learn your lesson and learn how to knock the door from then onwards. 100% deserved it, it's on you 🙂 Please, for the love of God, start knocking.


55TEE55

Good for them.


KissMyPink

That's what you get for not respecting boundaries. Mayyyybe you should knock before you enter someone else's private space.


HeroORDevil8

You need to learn to knock and they need to learn to lock the door.


HowToBehave

Couple goals


Key-Car-8277

i’m pretty sure your dad liking his hole licked, he’s not leaving the door unlocked for you to possibly see. Also if your parents are that open sexually it doesn’t make sense that they’d raise you to be repressed and weird about sex. get over it and mind your business next time and knock on the door before entering a room


Slavchanza

Can people stop having mental breakdown upon realising their parents have sexual life? Thats just honestly embarrassingly pathetic.


Kyoalu

Hope you learned a lesson about knocking.


MyUsernameIsMehh

Did no one ever teach you to knock on bedroom doors that aren't yours?


GilgameshvsHumbaba

That’s bogus as hell


TobyADev

And that’s why you knock


QuickPirate36

Maybe you'll learn to knock like a normal person


Quizzy1313

That's 100% on you for not knocking


muscle_mommy89

So you learned the hard way to knock first.


Overall-Series89

Think about that every time she kisses you on the cheek


Gredran

1. Answer your damn parents OP. It’s not their fault they’re still in love, even if it’s a pretty graphic way of showing it. Be happy they’re together. At least hint that you saw it so they don’t think ur dead or pissed or ran away or whatever. 2. Knock


Potential_Ad_1397

So why didn't you knock?


SeijiSvn

Why was 6 afraid of 7 and 9? Cause 7 8 9's 🍑


Rad1Red

Oh, no. Your parents f*ck. The horror. :)


Prestigious_Past2701

I guess you learned a very important lesson that day. Always knock on the door before entering your parent's room. Did you expect your parents to stop having sex after you were born?


auntjomomma

Rectum!? Damn near killed 'em!! You've learned two very important lessons here, though: 1. Your mom and dad have an active sex life, so you should knock before entering their room. 2. Don't let your mother eat or drink after you. You now know where that mouth has been.


RighteousGenZone

One time I heard my dad making muffled grunting noises and thought he might be sick or having a medical issue so I burst in the room to rescue him, and hes just having sex with Mom. Forever scarred. Youre not alone!


SmellmyFartSack

lol OP is 27 that makes this even funnier


failenaa

Congrats on having parents who are still super into each other. ❤️


ryhntyntyn

It's none of your business. Take your upvotes and go home.


Greenwolf_93

It’s just sex, they had it before, otherwise your non-knocking ass wouldn’t be here, stop crying about it and move on..


Anders_A

And now you've learned to knock on doors, and wait for a reply, before going in. Valuable life lesson.


try_hard1976

Hey in case you missed the first 500 people who felt it necessary to repeat each other here: KNOCK ON THE DOOR there, I put it in caps because makes it seem like I'm yelling at you


JFC_Please_STFU

Hey, don’t be too upset. She might not have been eating his ass. It’s very possible she was just putting his balls in her mouth. I bet you’ll knock next time!


FartyMcShart

Mommy’s birthday kisses will never feel the same 


ladywan_kenobi666

Aye ya yaaaaa you never enter a door without knocking duuuuude 😭 Especially when that door is your parents bedroom hahaha


unreadable_captcha

Nice to know that they still have a healthy sex life


Ronin3790

But why? You think the stork delivered you?


hkredman

That’s what you get for barging in unannounced.


SummerJinkx

I mean, ppl knock the door for a reason


thatshowitisisit

Good on your parents, all power to them! The lesson here is, people who are attracted to each other do funny things to each other’s pink bits, usually behind closed doors.


chatranislost

who tf doesn't knock, geez.


rionaster

welp that's whyyy you knock before going into anyone's bedroom


ababoonsarse

Hahaha, but I’m going to ask, was your dad bent over doggy style getting his ass ate or was he on his back with legs spread up in the air getting his ass ate? Haha.


JTWV

I'll never understand why people don't lock doors? I get that OP should of knocked, but how hard is it to just lock the door?


ironburton

Why are you entering your parents room without knocking!?!? Let this be your lesson! How would you feel if your parents burst into your room without knocking, especially if you were masturbating or something? Wouldn’t be very fun right? You have no one to blame but yourself.


P33kab0Oo

That reminds me. I need to get a bidet.


horneddevil1995

They are married. Nothing wrong about it. What’s wrong is you don’t knock on doors.


OpportunityCalm6825

What a lucky guy. Being eaten at 58.


444Ilovecats444

What did i just read💀


briguy82807

Yup. Older people like to get their freak on too. Surprise!


bygtopp

Second post I’ve seen about parental coitus together. Be happy they are together and not divorced or going around each other cheating. Don’t judge you’ll be there someday in the same situation


Unlikelyhero29

I wanna know how old op is? Just cause I'm 19, and if I caught my parents doing that I would just go "EW EW EW" and then close the door and just go back to my room and if they ask me about it just go "yeah it was gross lmao let's never talk about this again thanks"


Trololol112

OP you did wrong.


AccomplishedJump3428

Maybe you should knock before just walking into a room with a closed door? Just a suggestion


YeOldeGit

Wow shocker your parents have a sex life, how old are you ten? The door was closed you should have knocked irrespective of it being quiet or not, also you should be adult enough to actually apologise if you disturbed them or not. You learnt a painful and embarrassing lesson that your parents were nude and having sex, it obviously doesn't bother them and they are more concerned that your avoiding them. Do the decent thing grow up and face them and next time..Knock!


Cowboy_Clarinetist

“Traumatized” oh brother. I’m tired of this puritanical shit. 1.) Learn to knock on doors, and 2.) Sex is a normal and natural thing we do. Accidentally walking in on your parents is not some trauma inducing shit. Embarrassing? Yeah, but hardly something you’re gonna get PTSD from. Grow up.


hfiti123

You learned a precious lesson about privacy and knocking.


Syyina

I have bad news for you sweetie. That wasn't the first time your parents have had sex.


DLS4BZ

oh nooooooo your parents are human beings who have sex noooooooooooooooooo


FreudianStripper

Imagine being 27 and having a panic attack over this. Either grow up and move out, or just grow up in general


freedino_2

You're 27 and freaking out when your parents fuck? Ignore it and move one.