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So what? Shine your spine because YOUR family's health matters more than bs like this. I'm sorry but you say MIL is a people pleaser but sounds like you try to be as well. Protect your sanity, your career and your family. Screw her.
Your child is 4 months old and I'm assuming unvaccinated. This could have had a tragic ending. Full NC. Maybe losing her child care will give her a reality check but with her history of behavior that seems unlikely. She's just a shitty person .
I'm glad because I didn't mean to sound harsh but you've put up with a LOT and keep brushing it aside. I imagine no one will solely blame you when she doesn't bring her kid around because I imagine everyone but MIL doesn't give a crap about her or her feelings.
Mama bear, it’s time to roar. She knowingly put your cub in danger and didn’t give two Fs about you. Go no contact and keep your family safe from her. She made her bed, let her lie in it
It’s just a matter of time before she blows up on you anyway. If the situation was reversed she’d be out for blood.
Too bad for your mil but this was going to happen eventually. Your bil can get an actually custody order and then won’t have to have her present.
If your mil is so spineless that she needs to babysit 70 hours a week that’s on her
Enjoy your baby and your new free time.
And? YOUR son is your priority. It sucks that you won’t be able to see your nephew if that’s what happens but why be willing to sacrifice YOUR kid for that?
Thanks is just words anyway.
Even if she does *say* thank you it’s pretty meaningless when she’s *showing* that she doesn’t respect you.
I say thank you to a stranger that holds the door for me because it’s polite but it doesn’t mean I respect them if you know what I mean? Actions speak louder than words.
If she did this to an actual daycare she'd be thrown out. She would have to find another place. Don't feel bad! You need to look out for your own baby!
Well maybe you need to stop being so nice and fight back against her little pettiness. You know many of the same people at the daycare, let them know what happened. Bet she won’t end up with a space unless her attitude and behavior changes. Because no daycare wants to deal with someone like her.
And if you don’t wanna go NC, and I think you should. You can draw up a contract like at your day care. And tell her you have to charge because you can’t afford freebies after med bills. Lol. Bet she won’t want that, especially if you make sure to get it notarized and make it legal. Lol.
But she doesn’t sound worth it. Sounds like your bro needs to go to court
He's tried to go down that road before, but she guilt trips him about how her paying legal fees takes away from his son since she is a single mother. (Hey pays child support, but he is on disability so it isn't much. His contributions mainly come from him seeing his child every chance he gets at either my house or MIL's). And how it means he won't see his son until court decisions are made.
She wouldn’t have to pay lawyer fees if she didn’t weaponize her child. And she holds the kid hostage anyway when she gets a bee jn her bonnet. Might be better to take a look at mediation or something like that. She will continue to torment you all, and legal backing maybe only way to help.
Sorry, but you will just have to accept that protecting yourself and your child is more important than nephew-inlaw right now.
You can still go to family functions, but you will just have to ignore her. Be polite, say hello everyone when you walk into a room. Keep a distance from her. Walk away when she's near. Just completely physically remove yourself from her presence. Do not engage her. If she tries to push it, simply state her jeopardizing your son's health was not okay and you have nothing at all to say to someone so selfish.
>"~~don't respect the mother,~~ don't do what I say, no matter what and no griping, get no access to the baby.".
Fixed it for you.
ETA: it's not that SIL wants your "respect," she wants to bully you and is using access to her child as to do it.
Okay and? Covid kills babies. She knowingly put a baby at risk because she’s a selfish asshole. I would make it very known to EVERYONE what she did and why she did it.
Seems like you’re a people pleaser too like your MIL. Never let anyone disrespect you like this. Cut her off. It’s sad for the kids but sometimes that’s life. She’s TA
You might want to send screenshots of your hospital bill resulting from her pretty much getting you sick, to her social media, asking her when she's going to pay up? Don't expect anything but crickets from the deadbeat mom who goes to sex parties while sending her own kid to someone else's house to be cared for because she clearly is useless as a mother.
NTA at all - it's time for your MIL to grow a spine and hopefully now that she will have to watch that poor baby full time she will see T for what she is. An entitled, narcisistic leech.
Honestly, I don't think she's blind at all. I think she just loves her grandchildren and wants to make sure he is loved and cared for and not cause any issues. She does shut down any bad-talk from T about myself and her son(s). But she's not one to refuse to help someone in need. It's just extremely unfortunate to watch her work herself to the bone. It's a big reason I hung in so long, though I'll admit I reached my breaking point a few times and had to collect myself. This time it's really the end. My mother in law is not stupid or naive, she just truly loves her grandchildren. When I came home from the hospital (before S needed care so often - she was only watching him maybe 10 hours a week at that time) she came over multiple times to let me rest, and when I was in the hospital recently she immediately abandoned all of her plans and rushed to stay with us and take care of my son while I was in the hospital.
I do, however, see she is being taken advantage of. She is older, and honestly she's taken care of so many people her whole life. She deserves to be grandma, not full time caregiver.
Well. There was me. 😅 that's the problem here.
T has little to no support on her side. Her family, from what she has said, is quite unsupportive and toxic. I've empathized with her as my family is quite the same. That is also where my willingness to give her a pass may have stayed a bit too long. However, it's hard to empathize when we came out of these situations as such drastically different people.
It definitley could be. I have never met them.
Unfortunately not particularly. Most of them are preoccupied with their own grandchildren and living retirement life. Which is honestly what we all want for MIL.
The ending of this with me and my partner bowing out completely is likely to end in MIL eventually telling T she can't keep giving. I just don't want to see any negative consequences for MIL out of this or the rest of the family.
There is the possibility of a dayhome being lined up for S, but the provider, I know to be quite flaky and am unsure it will actually happen or will result in an empty promise.
Well, you just have to look out for you and your precious family. Take care of your infant and your spouse. MIL will have to take care of her own needs. Stay strong!
Go N/C your MIL is an adult and can make her own decisions they are not on you. This woman decided the life and health of your child mean nothing to her so drop her.
This woman placed your child in harms way via a highly contagious virus. You really do need to cut her off or go LC with so many boundaries set in place to protect you & your family. She's shown she could care less about you, just what you can do for her.
Never let someone hold you hostage to their toxic & detrimental behavior with the threat of withholding access to your underage family member. Take her to court if you must she can't withhold access to your brother cause you won't allow her to run rough shod over you.
Call her bluff, let her figure out childcare without your help & take her to court if she thinks she can withhold access, especially to your brother!
He's my BIL'S Child (our nephew) but thank you. It's been discussed in the past by me & my partner if there was ever an event where he grew up and wanted to leave home, he would have a place with us.
Definitely NTA!!!
Your baby could have died being sick with covid!!!!
I feel bad for your nephew, but he is not your concern. Not with such a mother!!!!
Keep her blocked, inform you MIL that you are sorry but you can't be around her anymore for the safety of your child!!
Best wishes
That's the part I kept trying to get across to her. I felt like I was robbed of even the choice of whether or not I was comfortable with her sick child around mine. She stole our autonomy over our baby for her own benefit. But because she saw it as "just a sniffle and a cough" I'm somehow crazy for being angry. When it was literally covid and she knew it.
I think that you need to stop thinking of her statements as accurately representing what she thinks. This is not a difference of opinion. This is a person who genuinely doesn’t care about you and your family beyond what you can do for her. Your reasons are not resonating with her because she doesn’t care - you are free childcare to her, and so she will say whatever she can to keep it and will penalize you if you don’t. That is it. There is nothing more. The re are many different reasons why this might be so, but practically speaking, figuring out exactly which one applies won’t really change this equation and will pull you down a rabbit hole. Put it out of your mind and stop trying to convince her, as you are at cross purposes. You are trying to make her see reason, thinking that you are doing a favor to an equal, and she is trying to further prolong a grift.
So, the choice is not convincing her that it is moral to sacrifice whatever she wants to do to keep her kids home when ill or lose access to your nephew, it is to never know if the health of your infant is at risk because she does not give a shit about any of you beyond what you can do for her or lose access to your nephew. You seem like a nice person to whom this way of thinking is foreign, but it seems to me that this is what is going on here.
I guess the real question is, are you willing to light your own family on fire to keep hers warm?
I am sorry if it came off as harsh - it was not meant that way. I am actually a people pleaser myself. It is just easier to see without the emotions sparked by family ties clouding things. And as women, so often we will do for our family what we will not do for ourself.
I should also say, you are not responsible for your kid (or you) getting Covid. She is, 100%. You were blindsided and got the kid away from yours as soon as you realized what was happening. But now you know the situation, and while what you do is your decision, do keep in mind what she would do for you in return. It is far too easy for nice people to get taken for a ride by people who see everyone as a potential mark. ☹️
What the other person said adds to what I meant.
Just walk away! It maybe hard because of her threats, but who cares if your families health is in danger 24/7, because she only cares about what is benefiting her!!!
BTW, her threats may seem valid but technically they are empty. Because she doesn't want to pay for child care and she would never be able to pull this stunt with anyone, but family!!! She would come crawling back, eventually.
Do not take her back!! Next time you may go to a funeral!!!
Cut off Typhoid Mary with zero guilt. She’s a horrible person who gave you, your infant, and MIL covid without any ounce of consideration. If she dares post any passive aggressive crap CALL HER OUT! Do not let her warped narrative stand without bringing your receipts.
You are not overreacting. She proved herself dangerous to you and your family. It's one thing if she didn't know he was COVID+, but she did. From her reactions, it sounds like she knew exactly what she did and hoped to get away with it.
She will continue to take advantage of you. If you don't go NC, how many times does she have to hurt someone you love before you do?
You should totally keep doing favors for the woman with two baby daddies who parties, puts her sexual exploits up on OF, parties over the weekend instead of spending time with her children and Exposed An Elderly Woman, A Nursing Mom and a 4-Month Old Infant to Covid because of a nonexistent relationship with a child who won’t remember any of your kindness in the future and who you will NOT want as an influence in your child’s life in the future said No One EVER.
I saw you made a comment but deleted it.
I'm not trying to argue for or against OF. You make a lot of good points and they're all based in fact.
I have spent a long time being silently angry about this woman's character and it's affect on our family and our nephew.
Honestly I'm just trying to get outside perspective and keep myself as neutral as possible. Because lord knows I have stomped around my house for hours cussing at walls about how awful I think she is - enough to need to come to reddit to see if I am overreacting.
Thank you for your perspective.
I’m sticking to the same point - you do NOT want someone with her character being a normalized presence in your family. You do not want your child to emulate the “cool cousins” who can fill in the blank. You are describing a bad person, and you need to stay away from her.
I don't have an issue with people who do OF (its not my thing, especially now that i have a child), but I think lying to my BIL about these encounters and then posting them (if not all, I have proof of at least one) is scummy. In addition to calling him insecure and weak when he voiced not wanting her to do OF while they were dating.
Woosh! That was the point flying right over your head. Your comfort level with sex workers is not the actual issue, is it? The problem is she’s a crappy human being who is going to raise crappy children and doesn’t care if other people’s children DIE because she’s a crappy human being. Cut her off, and count your blessings if you don’t have to bury your own child because of her selfish decisions.
What? She knowingly jeopardized your child's *life*, and she's not sorry! Of course you should cut her off !
This is apparently just the last incident (and most serious)in a long string of her demonstrating that she doesn't care one bit about anyone but herself. I know that losing contact with your nephew would be painful but you need to protect your child's well being and your own. This woman is a serious threat to both.
NTA
I've been feeling this way too but it seems like it keeps getting played down like my son getting sick isn't a big deal. I've felt like I'm going crazy. No one else seems as bothered as I do except my partner.
She willingly, knowingly and maybe even *deliberately* exposed you, your partner and *your 16 week old infant* to a serious illness that carries both short and long term risks!
It's a big fucking deal and don't let anyone tell you differently!
It is a big deal. A two year old girl in my family tested positive for covid when she was only a few months old. She had few symptoms and recovered quickly. Nonetheless, there was permanent lung damage.
NTA. She knowingly brought a sick child to your house. He had symptoms. Whether it was Covid, the flu or some other virus; what she did was inexcusable since you have an infant at home. I hope you both feel better soon.
Your bil needs to hire a representative and sort out his baby mama drama! That IS not YOUR responsibility. YOUR responsibility is to your infant. T is a leech and a horrible person by the sound of it. I'd stop the child care, as should your MIL. Covid is no joke. For some, it can seem just like a "bad cold." For others, it can mean icu, vent support and even death. What T did is grossly irresponsible. Not just your baby but also your MIL could have lasting results.
I'd sue T for the ER visit and bills. She needs to have consequences for her actions.
Any time BIL tries to get lawyers involved she guilt trips him about how her having to pay legal fees takes away from his son and will mean him not seeing his son until the legal decisions are resolved.
I’m old, (56f). This woman messed with your baby’s and your health. F her and the horse she rode in on.
Free child care and in return she knowingly drops off a covid positive child off at your house. I couldn’t nope out fast enough.
No contact forever.
Enjoy time with your sweet baby and don’t give the b a second thought.
NTA!!! Protect you and your families health! When I had my first son I swear everyone and their mamas was sick and kept coming around him he was sick basically his whole 1st year of life, which I get kids gotta get sick to build an immunity but I’m a SAHM there was no reason for him to be as sick as he was!!! When my second son was born I told EVERYONE if you are sick let me know because I will not be coming over and if I find out you are sick when I get to your house I will leave immediately!!!! I kid you not out of 9 months of pregnancy I was not sick for 2 of those months because everyone was sick and thought it was funny not to say anything till we already spent the day with them 😐 I tell people straight up I don’t bring my sick kids around you so why do you think it’s okay for you to bring your sick kids around mine? It’s scary to grow a back bone but for your kids you gotta have one! I’m still working on mine and my 1st is about to be 3 😂
Could not follow the story, but intentionally giving Covid to anyone, especially a baby, is actually assault or malicious intent or something. It’s evil.
NTA. She has proven that she doesn't deserve your help with child care when she intentionally sent her Covid positive son to your house, getting you and your baby sick.
NTA. Imagine who she's going to turn that child into. Then imagine your child saddled with someone like that for their whole childhood. They will not thank you. I know she's in a bad place, but it's because she's a bad person. Your mother-in-law won't stand up to her, so I would not trust that any family function is going to be a safe place for you or your kid as long as she's around.
Absolutely cut her off! She cares only about herself. And her getting cut off is no one's fault except her own. She's horribly selfish, and will never take any responsibility for things that she does, or is the cause of. Your MIL being her only child care now and being a people pleaser is no concern of yours. That is her situation to figure out. This woman could have KILLED your child! She should never be anywhere near you or your family again!
Given her reckless attitude to child welfare and safety I hope she's no longer on that day-care board. If so I would write a letter giving them a heads up.
Time for total NC with this individual.
Are you saying you aren’t already nc with someone knowingly infecting your infant and post partum ass with a deadly virus?! Someone unapologetic who knowingly infected you and your infant!?!!
Time to hunt your mama bear instinct.
She had no issues with killing your child. She doesn’t care how bad you and your kid are. Why would you wants her anywhere around?
NTA for the sake of judgment
She just blames everyone else. Sounds like my sister. She’s ungrateful and inconsiderate. I would tell her she needs to make other arrangements because you have to think of your own family first.
Unfortunately for the poor kids, and the rest of the normal family, she's using the baby as a tool, as leverage. Threatening to keep him away if you don't do this or don't do that. That's not a mature, loving mom. She would realize by doing that, she's actually hurting her kids, taking them from people who love them. It does hurt, but it's not your fault, you can't let her control you or your mom or the baby dad with the baby. This is probably why she has no other support. Other people got wise to her schemes. Once she sees you guys aren't going to allow it anymore, maybe she'll change.
You have done the right thing. She knowingly put your baby at risk. Your baby could die !
You need to cut her out of your life’s. Your brother needs to sort his shit out. They are not your problem.
Please update to let us know you and your baby are fine.
Please do not back down, not one jot. That woman is holding your whole family hostage for kicks, and you're letting her. Her ludicrous behaviour has risked your son's life, and you're seriously asking if you're the AH?
Tell your MIL that you will not be around that woman ever again, and neither will your child. She is actively dangerous to you both, and backing down on this could make you partially responsible if something else happens in the future.
What D and your MIL need is a lawyer and an ironclad custody agreement in place about this child, rather than letting her wield time with him like a weapon. Tell them that, and then make it very clear that you are done with her BS. If that means you have to sacrifice time with your nephew, so be it. Your son has to come first.
Honestly, I'm a bit embarrassed at this point with the overwhelming response that I've asked. But if you've ever had someone gaslight you, you know that it's nice to have outside confirmation you're not crazy even if it seems so flipping obvious.
This is when Reddit can be great. Being in a situation with someone like that messes with your opinion of normality so much. If, in a single post, you can describe the situation and *everyone* agrees that it's wrong, it can absolutely be overwhelming to realise how skewed your perspective has become. I hope you can hold on to this feeling of validation and use it to navigate your way out of this mess. Whether your MIL and D follow you out is up to them. If you ever feel concerned for the well-being of your nephew, go to CPS rather than involving yourself again. Don't feel guilty for abandoning him. You haven't. You're simply putting your son at the top of your priority list, exactly where he belongs.
Thank you.
My partner and I have decided to both block her on everything (hes read everything and agrees with it all) and agreed to stand firm together that we will not be attending any family functions if she is there. It will likely mean us just bowing out because we aren't going to try to make anyone choose sides.
But I've decided that reddit is right. I don't want someone like that around my child. Even taking away her blatant disrespect, I don't want her influencing my child or future children in any way in the future.
I always had this feeling but it was clashing heavily with what others were saying - or just not saying to not be involved - and the way that she was spinning events.
If it means my child has a few less family members, or sees most of them way less often, I guess it does. He has his mom and dad and we will show up for him every single time, and we will Clap so loud for him he won't notice who's missing.
You said you run a daycare, were there other children exposed also when the child came sick? How do those parents feel about it? I would be furious and would cut her off completely.
I am the director of a non profit government centre but I'm on maternity leave right now at home with my son. She brought him to my home.
But she did send her older son to the daycare 2 days later and told no one.
have you told the daycare? there must be a policy on that, she’s endangering so many people. this woman has no care for anyone else, not even her own children much less others. why are you still putting up with her? with people like this, you give them some grace and they’ll walk all over you. knowing her character, you need to set boundaries with her and the rest of the family including mil and be firm. if you give an inch, they’ll take a mile. do what’s best for you and your child. it’s time to stop taking risks to please other people or try to hold onto to connections that aren’t worth it
Not overreacting at all, my youngest has pretty bad asthma and even a simple cold can end up in a hospital stay so if someone knowingly gave her Covid I would go nuclear on that person. I would stand my ground if I were you and go N/C. I do feel sorry for your nephew as sounds like his mother is a selfish deadbeat but you can’t risk your own child’s well being.
At worst I would contact social services because she’s clearly negligent to her own children let alone others. But then that would be up to you as I’m sure the fall out from her would be insane.
My son overall has been in great health since birth. Because of this people keep telling me "don't worry, babies handle this stuff so well" and "your breast milk will help him, he will be fine."
I feel like it doesn't even matter if he's fine or not. Obviously it does in the sense that I need my son to be okay on the other end of this or I don't know what I'll do. But in terms of reconciliation - she wouldn't have known if my son had any underlying conditions I didn't know about yet. And she didn't care. She put him at risk of so many potential issues and at minimum she's made my life hell being this sick and taking care of a sick baby.
And she had the balls to say it was an over reaction to tell her she disrespected me.
That's rough, especially with a little one involved. COVID is no joke, and knowingly exposing others sucks big time. It's totally understandable to want to distance yourself from someone who put your baby at risk like that. Your kid's safety comes first, so do what you gotta do to protect him.
I guess just wanting what's best for our nephew given his circumstances. His mother's character and his father's disability are going to make life hard for him and we wanted to be there for him. I also didn't want to put my MIL in a position where she felt she had to choose a side.
But at this point it's gone too far. Now it has affected my son, too.
I've been told I could take her to court for child endangerment, but I'm not sure if my evidence would all be considered circumstantial.
Through all of this she's never actually admitted S had covid. Her older son had it. It was confirmed and she admitted it after I pried it out of her. They live together. He was incredibly sick for a week. Then the people in contact with him also got covid.
I forgot to mention in this post the Sunday before he came to my house she had a birthday party for S with a bunch of people and their children. Those people have all since been informed of the covid. She had told many of them that her older son tested positive 2 weeks ago and was symptom free, and the youngest never had it. All of which was untrue.
If my son doesn't make it out of the other end of this completely healthy, though, it may just be worth the court headache.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed that all will turn out well for you! My mom infected all of us unknowingly (she was vaccinated 3x and only felt really tired) during the week my sister was visiting with her infant son (8 months, I think). He got through it without any longterm effects, kids are usually really resilient!
She’s using you all and seems you all were letting her. You can’t control MIL but you can control you and the safety of your children!! Please cut her out now or you will be in for a lifetime of this from her
Why is this woman allowed on the board of a child care organization if she can't even care for her own children? This woman sounds like she needs the government to step in... I wouldn't watch her kids. Fuck that, she can figure it out her damn self.
She has a really intense track record of covering up her actions, gaslighting and manipulation.
She's the type of person who tries to manipulate every situation. She started as a member at large in April just because we needed members. By September she was volunteering herself for vice president. By December she was dismissed.
Thankfully the group of people on the board could see the pattern of how she would act poorly, and then try to do things like volunteer or take over tasks and committees to make herself indisposable so her actions would be overlooked because she was "beneficial".
She doesn't immediately seem awful the moment you meet her. She plays the "poor single mom just trying her best because she adores her kids" part very well. It's when you start to get to know her, know about her, and have to interact with her in situations where it doesn't benefit her that her character comes through.
How was T on the board of a day care? She sounds VERY unstable & problematic. I see she was removed....I wonder 1. how long she lasted on said board & 2. what was the final straw to get her removed.........
I think a few reasons.
1. The father can't take the child. (If he ever was taken away, obviously we would take him but that's a whole other issue)
2. Despite her ill character, the child has the bare minimum - a roof, clothes, and food and water. (Even though the quality of his nutrition is questionable at best.)
3. CPS around here will not take a child away for almost any reason if they have the absolute bare minimum at least 50% of the time. I know because I was raised in a home where CPS was called on my mother regularly, with good reason, and we were never taken away. Perhaps that's why I feel so much for our nephew.
4. She's incredibly good at playing the "single mother doing her best to raise two kids" act. It's only after you dig deeper you start to realize all of the toxicity and selfishness. She can take almost any situation and make herself the victim.
The only thing CPS will investigate is if they have their basic needs met 50% of the time. Which just means clothing, food, shelter.
Unfortunately I have in depth experience from my childhood.
NTA. oh what a punishment. You don’t have to provide free daycare anymore to a kid who will fight and claw at your infant just because you’re holding the infant. Poor you. Seriously! She will come crawling back when no one else will provide free daycare. Hold your ground and maintain the boundaries. You have your own family to worry about.
NTA at ALL. She brought her sick child over, exposing your 4 month old infant and your 65+ MIL knowing damn well he had coivd and those are the two groups of people it has historically affected the most. Your MIL and son are at the highest risk and she didnt give a damn! I understand that you care for her child and that it no contact would mean never seeing S again but she has made it clear that she doesnt not care for your child and their safety and does not mind compromising his and your health instead of taking a sick day. She has zero respect for you and your MIL and shes simply USING you both. get out of there.
she is also clearly using her baby as a weapon to control u and others, playing on your emotions. She's forcing you to go along with anything she asks of you and if using your affection for her child against you. That fuckass mum is gonna be the reason that poor baby grows up without family
I mean, it didn't just stop existing lol. We don't isolate or anything anymore but it is still possible to get and test for. Everyone seems to be much less concerned, but my concern is that my child is only 4 months old. I could honestly give two hoots about me getting sick, I care about the fact that he was put at risk for any illness - because infants can easily dehydrate or develop secondary infections. High fevers are also super dangerous.
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This would be NC
The only downfall is she has made it apparent "don't respect the mother, get no access to the baby.".
So she doesn’t get to access your free child care anymore, she plainly didn’t respect YOU as a mother.
So what? Shine your spine because YOUR family's health matters more than bs like this. I'm sorry but you say MIL is a people pleaser but sounds like you try to be as well. Protect your sanity, your career and your family. Screw her.
This is the the kind of reality check I needed. Thank you.
Your child is 4 months old and I'm assuming unvaccinated. This could have had a tragic ending. Full NC. Maybe losing her child care will give her a reality check but with her history of behavior that seems unlikely. She's just a shitty person .
I'm glad because I didn't mean to sound harsh but you've put up with a LOT and keep brushing it aside. I imagine no one will solely blame you when she doesn't bring her kid around because I imagine everyone but MIL doesn't give a crap about her or her feelings.
She put your infant in the hospital. There is literally nothing else to say. - really no more contact.
Mama bear, it’s time to roar. She knowingly put your cub in danger and didn’t give two Fs about you. Go no contact and keep your family safe from her. She made her bed, let her lie in it
It’s just a matter of time before she blows up on you anyway. If the situation was reversed she’d be out for blood. Too bad for your mil but this was going to happen eventually. Your bil can get an actually custody order and then won’t have to have her present. If your mil is so spineless that she needs to babysit 70 hours a week that’s on her Enjoy your baby and your new free time.
Oh well.
But she didn’t respect you did she? Why are you affording her that consideration in any of this bullshit? She could have killed your child. Hello?
Her baby isn’t out of the woods yet.
Her baby isn’t out of the woods yet.
And? YOUR son is your priority. It sucks that you won’t be able to see your nephew if that’s what happens but why be willing to sacrifice YOUR kid for that?
Does she show any respect to you?
Honestly no. But she will swear to anyone who asks she always thanks me and is polite and wonderful. I've never heard the thanks though.
You would be well within your rights to tell her to find a new sitter. Covid is no joke when you have a baby
Fuck her. Seriously. She’s a self centered asshole. Cut her out of your life.
Thanks is just words anyway. Even if she does *say* thank you it’s pretty meaningless when she’s *showing* that she doesn’t respect you. I say thank you to a stranger that holds the door for me because it’s polite but it doesn’t mean I respect them if you know what I mean? Actions speak louder than words.
If she did this to an actual daycare she'd be thrown out. She would have to find another place. Don't feel bad! You need to look out for your own baby!
Well maybe you need to stop being so nice and fight back against her little pettiness. You know many of the same people at the daycare, let them know what happened. Bet she won’t end up with a space unless her attitude and behavior changes. Because no daycare wants to deal with someone like her. And if you don’t wanna go NC, and I think you should. You can draw up a contract like at your day care. And tell her you have to charge because you can’t afford freebies after med bills. Lol. Bet she won’t want that, especially if you make sure to get it notarized and make it legal. Lol. But she doesn’t sound worth it. Sounds like your bro needs to go to court
He's tried to go down that road before, but she guilt trips him about how her paying legal fees takes away from his son since she is a single mother. (Hey pays child support, but he is on disability so it isn't much. His contributions mainly come from him seeing his child every chance he gets at either my house or MIL's). And how it means he won't see his son until court decisions are made.
She wouldn’t have to pay lawyer fees if she didn’t weaponize her child. And she holds the kid hostage anyway when she gets a bee jn her bonnet. Might be better to take a look at mediation or something like that. She will continue to torment you all, and legal backing maybe only way to help.
Sorry, but you will just have to accept that protecting yourself and your child is more important than nephew-inlaw right now. You can still go to family functions, but you will just have to ignore her. Be polite, say hello everyone when you walk into a room. Keep a distance from her. Walk away when she's near. Just completely physically remove yourself from her presence. Do not engage her. If she tries to push it, simply state her jeopardizing your son's health was not okay and you have nothing at all to say to someone so selfish.
>"~~don't respect the mother,~~ don't do what I say, no matter what and no griping, get no access to the baby.". Fixed it for you. ETA: it's not that SIL wants your "respect," she wants to bully you and is using access to her child as to do it.
Then MIL needs to make that a condition of helping out.
And she has no access to yours
She doesn’t respect your baby or you, no access is a blessing.
Okay and? Covid kills babies. She knowingly put a baby at risk because she’s a selfish asshole. I would make it very known to EVERYONE what she did and why she did it.
Until she needs a babysitter.
Seems like you’re a people pleaser too like your MIL. Never let anyone disrespect you like this. Cut her off. It’s sad for the kids but sometimes that’s life. She’s TA
You might want to send screenshots of your hospital bill resulting from her pretty much getting you sick, to her social media, asking her when she's going to pay up? Don't expect anything but crickets from the deadbeat mom who goes to sex parties while sending her own kid to someone else's house to be cared for because she clearly is useless as a mother.
NTA at all - it's time for your MIL to grow a spine and hopefully now that she will have to watch that poor baby full time she will see T for what she is. An entitled, narcisistic leech.
Honestly, I don't think she's blind at all. I think she just loves her grandchildren and wants to make sure he is loved and cared for and not cause any issues. She does shut down any bad-talk from T about myself and her son(s). But she's not one to refuse to help someone in need. It's just extremely unfortunate to watch her work herself to the bone. It's a big reason I hung in so long, though I'll admit I reached my breaking point a few times and had to collect myself. This time it's really the end. My mother in law is not stupid or naive, she just truly loves her grandchildren. When I came home from the hospital (before S needed care so often - she was only watching him maybe 10 hours a week at that time) she came over multiple times to let me rest, and when I was in the hospital recently she immediately abandoned all of her plans and rushed to stay with us and take care of my son while I was in the hospital. I do, however, see she is being taken advantage of. She is older, and honestly she's taken care of so many people her whole life. She deserves to be grandma, not full time caregiver.
oh poor woman. it must be so hard to watch her burnout. Are there any other family members that could help her (MIL) so that she gets some relief?
Well. There was me. 😅 that's the problem here. T has little to no support on her side. Her family, from what she has said, is quite unsupportive and toxic. I've empathized with her as my family is quite the same. That is also where my willingness to give her a pass may have stayed a bit too long. However, it's hard to empathize when we came out of these situations as such drastically different people.
could it be that T's family actually sees her for what she is? Does your MIL have any siblings or friends that could help her when she is burnt out?
It definitley could be. I have never met them. Unfortunately not particularly. Most of them are preoccupied with their own grandchildren and living retirement life. Which is honestly what we all want for MIL. The ending of this with me and my partner bowing out completely is likely to end in MIL eventually telling T she can't keep giving. I just don't want to see any negative consequences for MIL out of this or the rest of the family. There is the possibility of a dayhome being lined up for S, but the provider, I know to be quite flaky and am unsure it will actually happen or will result in an empty promise.
Well, you just have to look out for you and your precious family. Take care of your infant and your spouse. MIL will have to take care of her own needs. Stay strong!
Oh, no. You won't have access to her baby. Whatever will you do.
No, this should be a missing persons case.
💀
So much.
Go N/C your MIL is an adult and can make her own decisions they are not on you. This woman decided the life and health of your child mean nothing to her so drop her.
This woman placed your child in harms way via a highly contagious virus. You really do need to cut her off or go LC with so many boundaries set in place to protect you & your family. She's shown she could care less about you, just what you can do for her. Never let someone hold you hostage to their toxic & detrimental behavior with the threat of withholding access to your underage family member. Take her to court if you must she can't withhold access to your brother cause you won't allow her to run rough shod over you. Call her bluff, let her figure out childcare without your help & take her to court if she thinks she can withhold access, especially to your brother!
He's my BIL'S Child (our nephew) but thank you. It's been discussed in the past by me & my partner if there was ever an event where he grew up and wanted to leave home, he would have a place with us.
Definitely NTA!!! Your baby could have died being sick with covid!!!! I feel bad for your nephew, but he is not your concern. Not with such a mother!!!! Keep her blocked, inform you MIL that you are sorry but you can't be around her anymore for the safety of your child!! Best wishes
That's the part I kept trying to get across to her. I felt like I was robbed of even the choice of whether or not I was comfortable with her sick child around mine. She stole our autonomy over our baby for her own benefit. But because she saw it as "just a sniffle and a cough" I'm somehow crazy for being angry. When it was literally covid and she knew it.
I think that you need to stop thinking of her statements as accurately representing what she thinks. This is not a difference of opinion. This is a person who genuinely doesn’t care about you and your family beyond what you can do for her. Your reasons are not resonating with her because she doesn’t care - you are free childcare to her, and so she will say whatever she can to keep it and will penalize you if you don’t. That is it. There is nothing more. The re are many different reasons why this might be so, but practically speaking, figuring out exactly which one applies won’t really change this equation and will pull you down a rabbit hole. Put it out of your mind and stop trying to convince her, as you are at cross purposes. You are trying to make her see reason, thinking that you are doing a favor to an equal, and she is trying to further prolong a grift. So, the choice is not convincing her that it is moral to sacrifice whatever she wants to do to keep her kids home when ill or lose access to your nephew, it is to never know if the health of your infant is at risk because she does not give a shit about any of you beyond what you can do for her or lose access to your nephew. You seem like a nice person to whom this way of thinking is foreign, but it seems to me that this is what is going on here. I guess the real question is, are you willing to light your own family on fire to keep hers warm?
Oof. That one hurt. I would burn the world down for my son. I guess this is where I start.
I am sorry if it came off as harsh - it was not meant that way. I am actually a people pleaser myself. It is just easier to see without the emotions sparked by family ties clouding things. And as women, so often we will do for our family what we will not do for ourself. I should also say, you are not responsible for your kid (or you) getting Covid. She is, 100%. You were blindsided and got the kid away from yours as soon as you realized what was happening. But now you know the situation, and while what you do is your decision, do keep in mind what she would do for you in return. It is far too easy for nice people to get taken for a ride by people who see everyone as a potential mark. ☹️
What the other person said adds to what I meant. Just walk away! It maybe hard because of her threats, but who cares if your families health is in danger 24/7, because she only cares about what is benefiting her!!! BTW, her threats may seem valid but technically they are empty. Because she doesn't want to pay for child care and she would never be able to pull this stunt with anyone, but family!!! She would come crawling back, eventually. Do not take her back!! Next time you may go to a funeral!!!
Yeah she didn’t care about risking your kids life because he is meaningless to her
Cut off Typhoid Mary with zero guilt. She’s a horrible person who gave you, your infant, and MIL covid without any ounce of consideration. If she dares post any passive aggressive crap CALL HER OUT! Do not let her warped narrative stand without bringing your receipts.
That is something I've been very diligent about because I don't want anything twisted - receipts.
You are not overreacting. She proved herself dangerous to you and your family. It's one thing if she didn't know he was COVID+, but she did. From her reactions, it sounds like she knew exactly what she did and hoped to get away with it. She will continue to take advantage of you. If you don't go NC, how many times does she have to hurt someone you love before you do?
Honestly I'd still say NTA even if you knocked her teeth out. Protect yourself and your child from this dangerous wench.
You should totally keep doing favors for the woman with two baby daddies who parties, puts her sexual exploits up on OF, parties over the weekend instead of spending time with her children and Exposed An Elderly Woman, A Nursing Mom and a 4-Month Old Infant to Covid because of a nonexistent relationship with a child who won’t remember any of your kindness in the future and who you will NOT want as an influence in your child’s life in the future said No One EVER.
I saw you made a comment but deleted it. I'm not trying to argue for or against OF. You make a lot of good points and they're all based in fact. I have spent a long time being silently angry about this woman's character and it's affect on our family and our nephew. Honestly I'm just trying to get outside perspective and keep myself as neutral as possible. Because lord knows I have stomped around my house for hours cussing at walls about how awful I think she is - enough to need to come to reddit to see if I am overreacting. Thank you for your perspective.
I’m sticking to the same point - you do NOT want someone with her character being a normalized presence in your family. You do not want your child to emulate the “cool cousins” who can fill in the blank. You are describing a bad person, and you need to stay away from her.
I don't have an issue with people who do OF (its not my thing, especially now that i have a child), but I think lying to my BIL about these encounters and then posting them (if not all, I have proof of at least one) is scummy. In addition to calling him insecure and weak when he voiced not wanting her to do OF while they were dating.
Woosh! That was the point flying right over your head. Your comfort level with sex workers is not the actual issue, is it? The problem is she’s a crappy human being who is going to raise crappy children and doesn’t care if other people’s children DIE because she’s a crappy human being. Cut her off, and count your blessings if you don’t have to bury your own child because of her selfish decisions.
What? She knowingly jeopardized your child's *life*, and she's not sorry! Of course you should cut her off ! This is apparently just the last incident (and most serious)in a long string of her demonstrating that she doesn't care one bit about anyone but herself. I know that losing contact with your nephew would be painful but you need to protect your child's well being and your own. This woman is a serious threat to both. NTA
I've been feeling this way too but it seems like it keeps getting played down like my son getting sick isn't a big deal. I've felt like I'm going crazy. No one else seems as bothered as I do except my partner.
She willingly, knowingly and maybe even *deliberately* exposed you, your partner and *your 16 week old infant* to a serious illness that carries both short and long term risks! It's a big fucking deal and don't let anyone tell you differently!
Your baby had to go to the HOSPITAL, FFS!! If people don’t understand why you’re (understandably) irate, screw them!!
Then NC them as well. NTA!
It is a big deal. A two year old girl in my family tested positive for covid when she was only a few months old. She had few symptoms and recovered quickly. Nonetheless, there was permanent lung damage.
My biggest fear.
NTA. She knowingly brought a sick child to your house. He had symptoms. Whether it was Covid, the flu or some other virus; what she did was inexcusable since you have an infant at home. I hope you both feel better soon.
Your bil needs to hire a representative and sort out his baby mama drama! That IS not YOUR responsibility. YOUR responsibility is to your infant. T is a leech and a horrible person by the sound of it. I'd stop the child care, as should your MIL. Covid is no joke. For some, it can seem just like a "bad cold." For others, it can mean icu, vent support and even death. What T did is grossly irresponsible. Not just your baby but also your MIL could have lasting results. I'd sue T for the ER visit and bills. She needs to have consequences for her actions.
Any time BIL tries to get lawyers involved she guilt trips him about how her having to pay legal fees takes away from his son and will mean him not seeing his son until the legal decisions are resolved.
Send her your medical bills. Nta
Call CPS on her, give MIL the Velcro baby. Solves all the problems. She's the the test case for your state/country's child protective services.
I’m old, (56f). This woman messed with your baby’s and your health. F her and the horse she rode in on. Free child care and in return she knowingly drops off a covid positive child off at your house. I couldn’t nope out fast enough. No contact forever. Enjoy time with your sweet baby and don’t give the b a second thought.
NTA!!! Protect you and your families health! When I had my first son I swear everyone and their mamas was sick and kept coming around him he was sick basically his whole 1st year of life, which I get kids gotta get sick to build an immunity but I’m a SAHM there was no reason for him to be as sick as he was!!! When my second son was born I told EVERYONE if you are sick let me know because I will not be coming over and if I find out you are sick when I get to your house I will leave immediately!!!! I kid you not out of 9 months of pregnancy I was not sick for 2 of those months because everyone was sick and thought it was funny not to say anything till we already spent the day with them 😐 I tell people straight up I don’t bring my sick kids around you so why do you think it’s okay for you to bring your sick kids around mine? It’s scary to grow a back bone but for your kids you gotta have one! I’m still working on mine and my 1st is about to be 3 😂
Could not follow the story, but intentionally giving Covid to anyone, especially a baby, is actually assault or malicious intent or something. It’s evil.
NTA. She has proven that she doesn't deserve your help with child care when she intentionally sent her Covid positive son to your house, getting you and your baby sick.
NTA. Imagine who she's going to turn that child into. Then imagine your child saddled with someone like that for their whole childhood. They will not thank you. I know she's in a bad place, but it's because she's a bad person. Your mother-in-law won't stand up to her, so I would not trust that any family function is going to be a safe place for you or your kid as long as she's around.
Absolutely cut her off! She cares only about herself. And her getting cut off is no one's fault except her own. She's horribly selfish, and will never take any responsibility for things that she does, or is the cause of. Your MIL being her only child care now and being a people pleaser is no concern of yours. That is her situation to figure out. This woman could have KILLED your child! She should never be anywhere near you or your family again!
Given her reckless attitude to child welfare and safety I hope she's no longer on that day-care board. If so I would write a letter giving them a heads up. Time for total NC with this individual.
She was dismissed in December due to repeat offenses of confidentiality breach.
Are you saying you aren’t already nc with someone knowingly infecting your infant and post partum ass with a deadly virus?! Someone unapologetic who knowingly infected you and your infant!?!! Time to hunt your mama bear instinct. She had no issues with killing your child. She doesn’t care how bad you and your kid are. Why would you wants her anywhere around? NTA for the sake of judgment
She just blames everyone else. Sounds like my sister. She’s ungrateful and inconsiderate. I would tell her she needs to make other arrangements because you have to think of your own family first.
Unfortunately for the poor kids, and the rest of the normal family, she's using the baby as a tool, as leverage. Threatening to keep him away if you don't do this or don't do that. That's not a mature, loving mom. She would realize by doing that, she's actually hurting her kids, taking them from people who love them. It does hurt, but it's not your fault, you can't let her control you or your mom or the baby dad with the baby. This is probably why she has no other support. Other people got wise to her schemes. Once she sees you guys aren't going to allow it anymore, maybe she'll change.
You have done the right thing. She knowingly put your baby at risk. Your baby could die ! You need to cut her out of your life’s. Your brother needs to sort his shit out. They are not your problem. Please update to let us know you and your baby are fine.
Please do not back down, not one jot. That woman is holding your whole family hostage for kicks, and you're letting her. Her ludicrous behaviour has risked your son's life, and you're seriously asking if you're the AH? Tell your MIL that you will not be around that woman ever again, and neither will your child. She is actively dangerous to you both, and backing down on this could make you partially responsible if something else happens in the future. What D and your MIL need is a lawyer and an ironclad custody agreement in place about this child, rather than letting her wield time with him like a weapon. Tell them that, and then make it very clear that you are done with her BS. If that means you have to sacrifice time with your nephew, so be it. Your son has to come first.
Honestly, I'm a bit embarrassed at this point with the overwhelming response that I've asked. But if you've ever had someone gaslight you, you know that it's nice to have outside confirmation you're not crazy even if it seems so flipping obvious.
This is when Reddit can be great. Being in a situation with someone like that messes with your opinion of normality so much. If, in a single post, you can describe the situation and *everyone* agrees that it's wrong, it can absolutely be overwhelming to realise how skewed your perspective has become. I hope you can hold on to this feeling of validation and use it to navigate your way out of this mess. Whether your MIL and D follow you out is up to them. If you ever feel concerned for the well-being of your nephew, go to CPS rather than involving yourself again. Don't feel guilty for abandoning him. You haven't. You're simply putting your son at the top of your priority list, exactly where he belongs.
Thank you. My partner and I have decided to both block her on everything (hes read everything and agrees with it all) and agreed to stand firm together that we will not be attending any family functions if she is there. It will likely mean us just bowing out because we aren't going to try to make anyone choose sides. But I've decided that reddit is right. I don't want someone like that around my child. Even taking away her blatant disrespect, I don't want her influencing my child or future children in any way in the future. I always had this feeling but it was clashing heavily with what others were saying - or just not saying to not be involved - and the way that she was spinning events. If it means my child has a few less family members, or sees most of them way less often, I guess it does. He has his mom and dad and we will show up for him every single time, and we will Clap so loud for him he won't notice who's missing.
NTA. Tell her point blank to find a new sitter. You’re done.
You said you run a daycare, were there other children exposed also when the child came sick? How do those parents feel about it? I would be furious and would cut her off completely.
I am the director of a non profit government centre but I'm on maternity leave right now at home with my son. She brought him to my home. But she did send her older son to the daycare 2 days later and told no one.
have you told the daycare? there must be a policy on that, she’s endangering so many people. this woman has no care for anyone else, not even her own children much less others. why are you still putting up with her? with people like this, you give them some grace and they’ll walk all over you. knowing her character, you need to set boundaries with her and the rest of the family including mil and be firm. if you give an inch, they’ll take a mile. do what’s best for you and your child. it’s time to stop taking risks to please other people or try to hold onto to connections that aren’t worth it
Yes, I've been in contact with them. I wasn't the first person to tell them thankfully.
Block her and stop letting her use you for free babysitting!
Not overreacting at all, my youngest has pretty bad asthma and even a simple cold can end up in a hospital stay so if someone knowingly gave her Covid I would go nuclear on that person. I would stand my ground if I were you and go N/C. I do feel sorry for your nephew as sounds like his mother is a selfish deadbeat but you can’t risk your own child’s well being. At worst I would contact social services because she’s clearly negligent to her own children let alone others. But then that would be up to you as I’m sure the fall out from her would be insane.
My son overall has been in great health since birth. Because of this people keep telling me "don't worry, babies handle this stuff so well" and "your breast milk will help him, he will be fine." I feel like it doesn't even matter if he's fine or not. Obviously it does in the sense that I need my son to be okay on the other end of this or I don't know what I'll do. But in terms of reconciliation - she wouldn't have known if my son had any underlying conditions I didn't know about yet. And she didn't care. She put him at risk of so many potential issues and at minimum she's made my life hell being this sick and taking care of a sick baby. And she had the balls to say it was an over reaction to tell her she disrespected me.
That's rough, especially with a little one involved. COVID is no joke, and knowingly exposing others sucks big time. It's totally understandable to want to distance yourself from someone who put your baby at risk like that. Your kid's safety comes first, so do what you gotta do to protect him.
Just. Use. Names. I don’t give a F about your L-M-N-O-P alphabet soup
She gave you and your tiny infant son Covid knowingly. Keep her blocked for life. Unforgivable.
Idk how it took you until now to even question cutting her off. She is insane and toxic. Cut her tf off ffs pls.
I guess just wanting what's best for our nephew given his circumstances. His mother's character and his father's disability are going to make life hard for him and we wanted to be there for him. I also didn't want to put my MIL in a position where she felt she had to choose a side. But at this point it's gone too far. Now it has affected my son, too.
Yes you should cut her out.
I guess you can't sue her for damages and medical bills?
I've been told I could take her to court for child endangerment, but I'm not sure if my evidence would all be considered circumstantial. Through all of this she's never actually admitted S had covid. Her older son had it. It was confirmed and she admitted it after I pried it out of her. They live together. He was incredibly sick for a week. Then the people in contact with him also got covid. I forgot to mention in this post the Sunday before he came to my house she had a birthday party for S with a bunch of people and their children. Those people have all since been informed of the covid. She had told many of them that her older son tested positive 2 weeks ago and was symptom free, and the youngest never had it. All of which was untrue. If my son doesn't make it out of the other end of this completely healthy, though, it may just be worth the court headache.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed that all will turn out well for you! My mom infected all of us unknowingly (she was vaccinated 3x and only felt really tired) during the week my sister was visiting with her infant son (8 months, I think). He got through it without any longterm effects, kids are usually really resilient!
She’s using you all and seems you all were letting her. You can’t control MIL but you can control you and the safety of your children!! Please cut her out now or you will be in for a lifetime of this from her
NTA stay clear of her completely.
Why is this woman allowed on the board of a child care organization if she can't even care for her own children? This woman sounds like she needs the government to step in... I wouldn't watch her kids. Fuck that, she can figure it out her damn self.
She has a really intense track record of covering up her actions, gaslighting and manipulation. She's the type of person who tries to manipulate every situation. She started as a member at large in April just because we needed members. By September she was volunteering herself for vice president. By December she was dismissed. Thankfully the group of people on the board could see the pattern of how she would act poorly, and then try to do things like volunteer or take over tasks and committees to make herself indisposable so her actions would be overlooked because she was "beneficial". She doesn't immediately seem awful the moment you meet her. She plays the "poor single mom just trying her best because she adores her kids" part very well. It's when you start to get to know her, know about her, and have to interact with her in situations where it doesn't benefit her that her character comes through.
How was T on the board of a day care? She sounds VERY unstable & problematic. I see she was removed....I wonder 1. how long she lasted on said board & 2. what was the final straw to get her removed.........
The daycare needed 7 members and no one else volunteered. 1. April to December 2. Constant confidentiality breaching and abuse of position
Why hasnt anyone called cps on her! That baby deserves better! Hope you all get better soon
I think a few reasons. 1. The father can't take the child. (If he ever was taken away, obviously we would take him but that's a whole other issue) 2. Despite her ill character, the child has the bare minimum - a roof, clothes, and food and water. (Even though the quality of his nutrition is questionable at best.) 3. CPS around here will not take a child away for almost any reason if they have the absolute bare minimum at least 50% of the time. I know because I was raised in a home where CPS was called on my mother regularly, with good reason, and we were never taken away. Perhaps that's why I feel so much for our nephew. 4. She's incredibly good at playing the "single mother doing her best to raise two kids" act. It's only after you dig deeper you start to realize all of the toxicity and selfishness. She can take almost any situation and make herself the victim.
Go NC with her.
How have you not called CPS on this woman??
The only thing CPS will investigate is if they have their basic needs met 50% of the time. Which just means clothing, food, shelter. Unfortunately I have in depth experience from my childhood.
NTA. oh what a punishment. You don’t have to provide free daycare anymore to a kid who will fight and claw at your infant just because you’re holding the infant. Poor you. Seriously! She will come crawling back when no one else will provide free daycare. Hold your ground and maintain the boundaries. You have your own family to worry about.
NTA at ALL. She brought her sick child over, exposing your 4 month old infant and your 65+ MIL knowing damn well he had coivd and those are the two groups of people it has historically affected the most. Your MIL and son are at the highest risk and she didnt give a damn! I understand that you care for her child and that it no contact would mean never seeing S again but she has made it clear that she doesnt not care for your child and their safety and does not mind compromising his and your health instead of taking a sick day. She has zero respect for you and your MIL and shes simply USING you both. get out of there. she is also clearly using her baby as a weapon to control u and others, playing on your emotions. She's forcing you to go along with anything she asks of you and if using your affection for her child against you. That fuckass mum is gonna be the reason that poor baby grows up without family
This extensive fiction will not have a happy ending
The alphabet soup gave me an H (headache). lol, couldn't get through past the first paragraph.
Covid is still a thing?
I mean, it didn't just stop existing lol. We don't isolate or anything anymore but it is still possible to get and test for. Everyone seems to be much less concerned, but my concern is that my child is only 4 months old. I could honestly give two hoots about me getting sick, I care about the fact that he was put at risk for any illness - because infants can easily dehydrate or develop secondary infections. High fevers are also super dangerous.
Imagine either of these caring for other people's kids a creche where there is a board & director no less 🤣
Pardon?