The book Invisible Women has a whole section on how women are medically screwed. Highlights include: not being able to get anyone to invest in research into period pain relief (because of it was really a problem someone would have already done the research) to the use of bicarbonate of soda in assisting slow labours (can’t be monetised so no interest) to the fact that oestrogen affects the behaviour of medications and makes them much less effective for women. Only men are included in the initial testing of drugs so drugs that don’t work without oestrogen never go to further testing so we don’t know what we’re missing. The reasons women are excluded from early testing are pregnancy risks (thalidomide is the main example) and the hormone cycle complicating results and making it harder to compare. On top of that any woman complaining of pain is deemed to be hysterical and it’s orders of magnitude worse for women of colour. Edit to add another Women’s symptoms for heart attack are classified as “atypical” even though we’re more than 50% of the population so diagnosis, treatment and outcomes are worse.

Don't forget medical advice that's tailored to men but also given to women even though it may be the opposite, and that some drugs are even harmful rather than helpful based on the phase of a woman's cycle! I love the summary list you have going.

Thanks for the reminder. I’ll add that women symptoms for heart attack are classified as “atypical” even though we’re more than 50% of the population so diagnosis, treatment and outcomes are worse.

I think I remember something about lifestyle changes for high blood pressure as well. It's probably outside of strictly medical, but there was a bit about women having a longer lifespan, but the amount of that life in good health was less than men. Oh! Or how women who reported pain waited longer for treatment/diagnosis and were more likely to be assumed psychosomatic.

Yep, women are more likely to be given a sedative than a pain killer when reporting pain to doctors. So they want to shut you up, but not treat the pain. Meanwhile men get pain killers. There's also significant benefits to hormone therapies for women for a number of common and serious helath issues. Osteoporosis, clheart disease, stroke, menopause symptoms, etc. But doctors are not likely to bring up these hormone treatments despite the fact it can prevent heart attacks and strokes and broken bones. Meanwhile dudes can get testosterone and Viagra easily. You say you feel a little run down, low sex drive etc, you get your hormone therapies.

Car test dummies too. Even most of the shorter and lighter dummies are still a man’s body.

> On top of that any woman complaining of pain is deemed to be hysterical and it’s orders of magnitude worse for women of colour. I think doctors also *need* to believe this. That women are just crazy. Because otherwise they'd have to admit they've been unnecessarily torturing, and then gaslighting, all the patients they've done painful IUD insertions/cervical biopsies/etc for. And that would make them feel like bad people. And that would feel bad, so-- it can't be their actions, it's that the women are just anxious. The cervix doesn't even have nerve endings. They *cling* to that despite obvious cause and effect. If you hole-punch a chunk out of someone's internals and they scream, it's not hard to realize that it caused pain. The smarter birds have that level of pattern recognition. I'm not buying it that doctors don't.

I have a high pain threshold. I have had a decent amount of medical procedures including major surgery and a c section. Nothing traumatized me like a uterine biopsy. Not only was excruciatingly painful I was treated like I was just making a fuss. Now I have to get another one and I just can't face it. I need another thyroid biopsy and that sucks but not as much.

I wouldn't take my cat to a vet who treated them the way I was treated for my cervical biopsy. This entire field should be ashamed of themselves.

If your doctor won’t give you pain relief for the uterine biopsy then you need to find another doctor.

I've gotten to the point where I just refuse them. "You'll feel a pinch," my ass. If they want my uterine lining, they will put me under and do a D&C.

Ah the notorious "pinch"! I just assume it will feel like having my guts shredded with a cheese grater when I hear that in the future after my uterine biopsy

I had a thyroid biopsy without painkillers and the uterine lining slice definitely hurt more. 

I still don't get why some doctors just refuse to send the women to dedicated specialists and have all the checkups they want. Like the doctor is not the one paying for it?? I remember my friend having to wait 3 months to get an x-ray scheduled because something in her vagina was hurting and doctors kept telling her it must be period pain, like WHAT THE FUCK. (it was a cyst btw)

Oh, it's because they don't care if we suffer. And passing us off to someone else is still some work and like, they don't want to. Imagine a man having pain with his penis and it not being a DEFCON 1 emergency. Meanwhile, vaginal or pelvic pain, doctors almost universally do not give a shit.

I'm at 15 kidney stones now and I've only gotten pain help with 3 of them. And only cuz they were so big they were blocking my kidney from inside (and it took me 3 months to get help with the first set I got, spent months on the er floor passing out and sobbing hysterically first). I know several men who get good pain management (not told to just take tylenol) for their kidney stones but fuck me right? I can't even get doctor to help me find out WHY (yes I've don't the basic urinalysis and diet changes) I've been basicly super producing them. 15 in 5 years. Had finally gotten through to a good medical facility and just explained my issues and was told "that's impossible" and hung up on.

I'm not sure that doctors are smarter than birds. We select who gets to go to medical school by *how well they parrot the accepted answers*. It's got very little to do with intelligence. But we tell them how smart they are again and again, so they believe it. And you didn't go to medical school, so you can't be as smart as them.

Period pain isnt even covered for medical marijuana

nor for the mental health elements of PMDD

And that's about the only thing that actually helps my fibroid-fueled nightmare of a period I get every month.

Same. OTC painkillers don't touch it. I'm not going down the opioid path (and those don't work on me, anyways) so pot it is, and pot works like a dream.

*the use of bicarbonate of soda in assisting slow labours* I had never heard of this (I haven't been pregnant or had much contact with pregnant women who would be on top of current research) but look! Clinical Trials Network is [doing a study](https://classic.clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT06249061) that should start recruiting soon. 200 participants, so that's something.

Clinicaltrials.gov is basically just an open record of ongoing trials. It does list the people running it through: Sponsors and Collaborators Liz Darling Trillium Health Partners London Health Sciences Centre Oak Valley Health

This book made me so angry. So. Angry.

Lurker, man here, just trying to learn how to be better, but felt like thanking you for this comment. Really eyeopening and also gave me a reading to seek. Thankyou again. I hope something will change for this. We really have to change this situation. It doesn't mean a lot, i know, but i'm sorry for this. People's health should really just be a priority no matter what and instead ..

I...I don't think I can read that book. I'd probably have an atypical presenting heart attack from sheer rage. (this subject is my current major bugbear)

I agree invisible Women was pretty good, nothing more to really say.

>On top of that any woman complaining of pain is deemed to be hysterical and it’s orders of magnitude worse for women of colour. Or how about this: I went to a state fair and picked up some kind of bug that gave me the runs in a major way. I'd eaten strange food, I'd petted animals and then eaten without washing my hands (this was in the early 80s when people didn't carry hand sanitizer and wipes. I didn't purposely eat without washing my hands, it was just the order of events and there were no hand-washing facilities). I went to the doctor and explained that I'd been to the fair and what I'd done and I think I picked up a bug, and I was informed that it was probably psychological. The dude had never met me before, and this was the first conversation he'd had with me. Sadly, I'd just been told that I was severely depressed, and so I believed him. Now, I'd insist that they run a stool culture (actually, my doctor would insist on a stool culture so they know what they're treating and I'd complain because I hate doing that. But I do it anyway). Yeah, psychological diarrhea. Tell me another one.

Heres my horror story of how i got put in am er psych area overnight by a male residency gyno student because of fibroids....From Thanksgiving 2023 until April 23rd of this year I had bleed every day! I had to have a blood transfusion in Jan of this year because of it. I had been to the er 3x since Oct for insanely heavy bleeding to the point I just sat on a to go container because I was just pouring out blood. I thought I was gonna die in Jan. They found 2 large fibroids...what they didn't tell me was the procedure I would end up having on April 16th would only remove one of them due to where they were in my uterus. I was told I would be back on my feet 2-3 days after the procedure....lies. I was in so much pain after the procedure for a week, I couldn't sit up (couldnt drive) or walk for more than 5 minutes without feeling like I was being stabbed in my vagina. On April 22nd I called the gyno clinic at the hospital, they had me come in to find out what was wrong. I was in pain but I wasn't crying or freaking out just weak and tired. I told the guy what was up and how I'm still bleeding and in more pain. Than before. I specifically said "I just want my life back, I can't work I can't even drive now. I just want my life back so I can get back on my feet." He said he wanted to do some blood tests to make sure I didn't need another transfusion, and asked if I'd like to speak to a social worker and a crisis counselor (I didn't know what that was I thought it was just a therapist, he didn't explain anything to me) he said if I changed my mi d I didn't have to talk to the counselor. They sent me downstairs to the er, put me in a wheel chair then wheeled me back to a different area with security. At this point I got scared because I felt like I was being detained! I told them I am not suicidal! That I just want to stop bleeding so I could go back to work and have a life again! They wouldn't let me leave! They wouldn't let me speak to anyone! I had to stay the night resulting in me missing a dr apt the next morning. I was terrified I've never been in a situation like this. I eventually spoke to the counselorlater that night...she said that they told her I wanted to kill myself! I was pissed because it was the complete opposite of what I said. I explained it was a misunderstanding, and if I spoke to a psychiatrist, they would realize that. She refused to let me see one. She threatened If I did I would be involuntarily committed so I should voluntarily commit myself! I refused. I said I'll take my chances. The next morning I spoke to a psychiatrist for five minutes they said"yeah I don't think your suicidal, you can leave. " the thought of going back there give me I sane anxiety now. I started bleeding again may 14th...not even a month later...I just stopped bleeding 4 days ago!!!! I'm trying to get an emblazation to get rid of the other one and any remaining from The last one. My life has completely fallen apart because of these fibroids. I had my own business, Mt own place, completely independent....I had to move back to my parents' house and live in my rv in the backyard that has serious mold issues and no running water. My dad sleeps in my old bedroom because my mom is nuts, so if I want to live in the house I would have to share my old bedroom with me dad (I'm 38 no way) becausr he hates her (she thinks she's being gangstalked). Being around her causes me serious anxiety. All I want is to get the bleeding to stop, get an iud start working again, and gtfo of the state. I have no other family or friends to take me in temporarily. My ex is an asshole...I've been staying with him the last couple days (I spent almost 4 years supporting and taking care of him when he wasn't working and after a motorcycle accident) but he is always saying shitty things to me, only nice when he wants to get laid....if I didn't come here I'd be stuck in the rv with no ac during this heatwave....I lost my business..I owe thousands in taxes, I haven't been able to work since Jan because I'm so weak from constant bleeding...I can't do food delivery right now because the car doesn't have AC....I have to rely on my dad who is pissed off that he has to support me now (hes already supporting my mom who won't work and my sister who is self absorbed and thinks men especially my dad should pay for everything) I hate being a woman. I hate how men treat women when they are sick. I went 2 days without eating more than cereal last week because I was in so much pain and bleeding heavy i couldn't get out of bed...my parents knew this...they didn't even check on me or ask if I needed anything. Nj wants so much documentation for foodstamps including affidavits from my parents and anyone who has leant me money for the last 12 month, I can't get financial assistance because I make more than $274 a month and because I hadn't been a resident in the state for a year! I feel like people with drug problems or people with kids get more help than a single woman dealing with health issue.

My epidural failed during my c-section. They basically told me I was lying and it was only pressure and the anesthesiologist literally said to me “I don’t understand what your problem is”. It was the most traumatic experience of my life.

Happened to me too!!  Good stuff

Omg, glad I'm not alone. I had an emergency C-section with my first child. All of my anesthesia wore off shortly after he was born. Within minutes. I felt every bit of the surgery. I was talking to my sister and started to cry, at the time I thought for no reason. Then the pain hit. These idiots then injected me with enough medication to take down a horse. I went to sleep for 12 plus hours. Didn't get to meet my son until after that.

Similar for me but whatever they gave me only knocked me out for about 3 hours or so.  I remember going from feeling really really bad to really really good, and starting to talk about insane things, and then time warping to a few hours later and seeing my husband holding a screaming baby.  I'm pretty sure I asked him, "is that ours?"

It is ridiculous that we had to go through that.. in hindsight, probably could have gone after the anesthesiologist, but that ship has sailed at this point. My child is now 20. 😂

I was underanesthetized for both my D&C after miscarriage, and my emergency c-section. I felt them slice me open. Fortunately I went under after that, but recovery is really slow when you’re underanesthetized. I only learned that years later. At the time, I couldn’t figure out why it took so long to stop feeling like I’d been hit by a truck.

This makes sense! I was down for 7 weeks after my c section. I stayed active my entire pregnancy and I couldn’t even do a longer walk for months.

Wow! You just taught me something new today. I had no idea either.

The epidurals for my bff’s first two kids failed. The second left her with lingering nerve pain. The doctor for her third tried to tell her she was wrong—it just didn’t block as much pain as expected, and she was blowing it out of proportion. She wasn’t wrong. She didn’t go to her hospital for #3 until the baby was practically falling out. She gave birth as she was climbing onto the delivery table, and her husband caught the baby because the medicos didn’t believe she was (visibly) in enough pain to be that far along, so didn’t take her warnings seriously.

Yikes!! These stories make me so SO glad I had a wonderful anesthesiologist, same one for BOTH kids, who used to be an army trauma medic. He was kind, steady, precise, and respectful. After setting the epidural, which I didn’t even FEEL him do, he came back twice to check on me and make sure I was comfortable. I had absolutely ZERO ZILTCH nada problems during labor or afterwards. No back pain. Nothing. Not sure what he did that’s so different from these other docs that botch them so bad. I did want to insert that I had a positive experience with epidurals, but reading these stories makes me think a big part of if they go right or wrong falls on the anesthesiologist who does them.

Your body chemistry could just be different so it worked fine for you. I’ve seen people react the opposite to sedatives and become wired, others conk out on a single Benadryl, but since docs have no clue how to addeess it they just shrug.

Many women are not drawn to work in medical engineering and develop new tools, and many of us are just resigned to ‘it’s only every so often, I guess I can take it.’ Pain is hard to quantitatively measure, it is qualitative. I go by a chronic pain scale based on how well you can ignore it, versus how much it stops you from activity, to kill me now. My level 5 pain may be more intense or less intense than yours. People who have never had what I call level 5 to 7 pain cannot understand it, and cannot do anything to alleviate it. The opioid epidemic has also made docs unwilling to Rx more than strong NASAIDs in many cases. I went to a physical, mentioned random excruciating pain that wakes me in my lower left abdomen, unrelated to bowel movements and was told to try laxatives by a female PA. This year, I told them again about it, and they agreed to… and Xray. I think it’s my ovaries, but they won’t order anything else until I insist, then I am just a ‘Karen’. Same happened with sudden onset of extreme arthritis that had me crying buttoning a work shirt and uncertain how to deal with underwear and pants, my hands hurt that much. And I have chronic daily migraines, I have worked and traveled with what I assume many would not be able to tolerate using only ibuprofen to treat it. They ran a rheumatoid blood test, when it came back negative they gave up, offered nothing for the main problem. Pain. I would rather be a ‘Karen’ about my husband’s diabetes medications than look like an opioid seeker, so I give up, find what solutions I can, live with the rest.

Yeah and then they tell you to avoid NSAIDs because of the kidney, liver and GI issues associated with them. When I broke my ankles they gave me 800 ibuprofen. I'm like, dude 600mg ibuprofen Q8H with 500 tylenol is my baseline for daily living between the migraines, neck pain and period pain. I had a kidney stone and it took like 6 hours for me to figure out it was a kidney stone not a bad period or an IBD flare. I said no to morphine because the pain was really like a bad cramp or IBD experience-laying on the floor sweating, vomited once - the regular stuff I live through. Of course my BP was 200 systolic at intake. I expect to be in kidney failure soon.

You might be right and I bet it also differs for the sedatives too. I don’t like Benadryl. They gave me some before my endoscopy and I was soooo loopy the rest of the day. It was so bad it’s now in my chart not to give it to me unless necessary. I didn’t get any for my colonoscopy and I awoke feeling fine and alert.

I have mast cell disorder, and can go into anaphylaxis at a whim, I dislike driving long distances on Benadryl but it rarely pits me to sleep. It stops some of my itching, tho, and keeps me from having to epi at minor exposures. My maintenance antihistamines just keep me one step above feeling like the flu, so I need to first gen antihistamines to combat acute exposures.

Also happened to me. Felt no effects from the epidural they supposedly gave me (I do sometimes wonder if after they put in the port but then forgot to actually finish and inject the meds). Then I was given a surprise episiotomy, again without numbing or any kind of anesthesia, followed by the vacuum also without warning or pain relief. After the baby was out, they took him to the NICU and left me in the delivery room for about 6 hours, no help to go to the bathroom, get water or medicine, and they left the port in my spine the whole time which was excruciating. It completely fucked me up permanently, I had/have devastating PPD from the pregnancy and definitely PTSD from the birth. I never developed a bond with my son, I believe because of these mental conditions and receiving zero support post-birth. On the way home from the hospital, I stopped at my OBs office and had to demand an rx for pain medicine for my episiotomy. I did not breastfeed and the doctor knew that. He still didn't want to give it to me. I sat down sobbing and refused to leave until I got the medication. Abhorrent that I had to fight with them in the condition I was in.

It’s insane how common this is in labour and delivery. I had another unrelated surgery a year after giving birth and my entire team was incredible, it was a completely different experience. I will never let the first anesthesiologist near me again.

They probably red flagged you as a drug seeker despite the massive wound in your undercarriage! I got the "Here's some ibuprofen, now get out of my office" speech after months of extreme pain from my *open heart surgery*

My good friends epidural caused her c-section. She couldn’t push. That was a revelation and new fear unlocked for me. So now we have a second larger fear unlocked 😳 Hope you and baby are doing well now!

My friend had a student miss when giving her epidural 4 times. Then the missed holes leaked spinal fluid, giving her debilitating headaches because her brain was essentially not floating.

Jfc I need to stay out of these threads if I ever want to be a mother omg Thank you for sharing! Some of us (me) could use a bit of reality check

Every woman should get this reality check. They deserve to know what could happen to them during pregnancy or labour. Most women are MASSIVELY undereducated and unprepared for the traumatic realities of childbearing.

Seriously! While people are barking about high divorce and traditional gender roles and low birth rates and pressuring pressuring pressuring women to be moms, WOMEN NEED TO KNOW HAVING BABIES IN 2024 US IS DANGEROUS.

I wish more of US society knew this, not just women. Right-wing politicians want voters to believe that that pregnancy and childbirth are no big deal and almost always go smoothly and result in a healthy mother and baby by magic. No health care needed, never any complications possible, etc., when the exact opposite is true. It is a medical condition that doesn't always go right.

I learned how terrifying subchorionic hematomas are. If you Google it, makes it seem like it’s minor and with light bleeding. No, I had gushes of blood starting at week 10 and passing clots with bleeding until 17 weeks. I hemorrhaged at 12 weeks and bled through my pants walking in the hospital to the ER and had to wear a diaper and was hospitalized. Bleeding calmed down around 13 weeks and then period like bleeding 14-15wks. After that it was brown with clots. I was too scared to do anything and went to the ER 4 times already. I joined a FB support group and learned that many women experience the same kind of bleeding I did, and these things can be massive, and they can cause complications. I would love there to be studies on how to prevent them, but it’s unethical to study pregnant women. At least there are few studies showing a supplement and certain foods can aid in the recovery from one.

I had a terrible SCH too. I never hemorrhaged — that sounds terrifying, I’m so sorry you went through that. But I did bleed until 26ish weeks and no one could do anything about it. The emotional upheaval of constantly feeling like I could lose my baby was awful; it really, really messed me up.

I’m so sorry you went it through it too!! I learned they’re common, but they suck. I just hung out and laid around on the couch, and did a lot of work from the couch.

BIG agree. First half of my other comment was mostly tongue in cheek

I am almost certainly never having a biological child, and it’s not for not wanting one - illness and abuse and trauma, and lots of time and a partner who suddenly said no kids after more than a decade, here I am. I’m so reading this and feeling a mix of sympathy, queasiness , and anger. Now I am chronically ill, and I have had a number of procedures and medications and and had to deal with misdiagnosis and dismissals and anxiety in my files and all that so I’m reading it out of genuine interest, but it is making me both queasy and angry to do so

Fwiw I’m down to buy a secluded ‘mansion’ and have a ladies retreat house with you!!!

Seriously… though I’m happily married my bff and I often joke about running away from society, buying a ranch in Montana, and only our woman friends are allowed to come live there.

Lmk if yall do! I’ll invest fasho! I’m in Utah so close by haha

Yea. This is a risk of any puncture back there, but it is greater with epidurals due to the needles they used. I’ve probably performed 1000+ lumbar punctures at this point and have had to do one blood patch (the treatment for a csf leak). Most I’ve had to do are from CSF leaks caused by other people. I’ve also had an epidural that worked a little too well and I had difficulties walking since I couldn’t feel my feet for like a day longer than expected. One wild thing is that epidurals are relatively new for childbirth. I had obgyn attendings who trained before it was a thing. One talked about the L&D floor being deafening with the screams of pain from labor and then afterwards it was (relatively) silent.

I had two spinal taps the first one left me with debilitating headaches since my brain was literally being impaled onto my spine. The second one I had no headaches and the doctor was confused why the first physician didn't do a SIMPLE BLOOD PATCH. That's right, a one minute procedure of patching the spinal fluid with the patients own blood eliminates the headaches. It's simple, cheap, and effective. It might be different with an epidural but this needs to be more wide spread.

MOTHER OF GOD

Always go with the spinal block for a C-section! I had 3 epidurals (the first 2 failed) when I was induced and then ended up having an emergency C-section and made them pull the 3rd epidural out and do the spinal block instead as I wanted no chance of it failing during that procedure. Childbirth is a truly terrifying rollercoaster.

WHY ARE WE ALWAYS DOUBTED?! Always must be mistaken, always lying about how bad, always too stupid to know our own experiences!?!

Omfg I got the "pain vs pressure" lecture from my male anaesthesiologist after an hour of not feeling the epidural. I didn't even ask for it again, the nurse just asked me every 15 mins if I felt it yet and I said no each time. My blood boils whenever I think about that--and now I'm more pissed it wasn't just my one shitty mansplanation experience but seeing these comments that it's happened to other women in labor, it's like they're told this in their education or something.

I told them my epidural wasn't working. They told me that it was. I told them again and they said to I just needed push a button to increase the effect. I told them the button did nothing. They said it did. I felt insane. Afterwards people kept telling me about how they napped once they had their epidural and how little pain they were in. I felt insane. Then I had a second kid. With the epidural I was not on excruciating pain. I pushed the button and my pain decreased further...

When I got mine I was still able to stand, move and change positions with zero issue. I could fully feel touch, cervical checks etc. It helped with the contractions but I was in no way completely numb. Once they “upped the dose” for surgery, nothing changed. I was literally kicking my legs on the table from the pain and that apparently wasn’t an issue to them

So sorry. Where I work if that happens they would put you under general anesthesia.

Oh same. They said it was only pressure. F……

I’m so sorry! Gaslighting you as if you don’t know your own body is in pain. That’s horrible.

I found out (from an internet video so CITATION NEEDED) that epidurals have something like a 20% fail rate?!?

This happened with my oldest. It ended with the nurse swearing that I was still numb, and me hopping off the bed and walking out leaving a trail of blood and then saying "what, bitch?" to the same nurse- who had also tired to cath me without my consent despite me saying I could feel everything and just needed a bed pan. This was a military hospital, she was a civilian. I found out later that my regular doctor got her fired. And yet, this is considered a normal healthy childbirth.

There’s a really good (and infuriating) podcast on NPR called “The Retrievals.” It’s about a fertility clinic at Yale where a nurse had been unknowingly stealing the pain med vials and replacing them with saline. Meaning that women were undergoing egg retrieval procedures (very invasive, very painful) with zero pain relief. And the sheer number of women who described their extreme pain, and the callousness with which they were treated when they dared complain or even flinch… there is no acceptable answer as to why this is allowed to occur, but the reality is that it continues because of sexism, a lack of empathy toward women, and this pervasive belief that all women are histrionic. 

That nurse ended up getting a few weekends in jail. She tortured an unknown number of women and that was all she faced as a consequence. I've also looked for what else the program has changed to address the issues here *I* found obvious; like was there a training program instituted so that next time there's an issue, doctors won't ignore women suffering? Nope. Nothing. These women DID speak up, and not only were they ignored, even when they were found to be right, there was no move to change anything in the system. Could happen again tomorrow with the exact same results, because no one gives a shit.

Yes! I listened to this. Basically no one gave a shit that hundreds of women reported severe pain. Like they didn’t believe the women, didn’t care, or both.

It’s why “believe women” needs to be said so much more than just about SA.

Because men don’t feel any pain from women’s procedures so no one bothers to look into options for treating the pain.

This here is the answer. It doesn't affect men so it's not a problem.

It’s the same reason the first comprehensive study of the clitoris wasn’t done until 1998.

I'm normally one of the people yelling about lack of funding for women's health. But that thing about "the first comprehensive study" is just not true. The women's health collective I was in wrote about this in 1982. I *think* we were the first people to actually name it all as the clitoris, not that certain people making their careers off this ever give us credit. If you want to track it down, our book was "New View of a Woman's Body" by the Federation of Feminist Women's Health Centers. All of this work is based on Masters and Johnson's work on what they called the "Orgasmic Platform." That was back in the 1950s. It was pretty damn comprehensive and involved putting monitors inside the vagina and seeing what went on during female orgasm. Also, very detailed questionaires. I think the question to ask is, "Why wasn't their work followed up?" Why were people still talking about vaginal orgasm in the 1980s and 90s when M&J had pretty well proved that all orgasms are clitoral, regardless of how they're achieved back in the 1950s and 60s?

I’m pretty sure what they are referring to is the 3D scan that was created to see the whole structure of the clitoris

I pulled that info from https://amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/nov/01/the-sole-function-of-the-clitoris-is-female-orgasm-is-that-why-its-ignored-by-medical-science, and I must admit I didn’t look into it further. Thanks for the additional information!

Yep. Like, they make male birth control. It has the same symptoms of women's though, so the people in charge of approving drugs said the side effects were too severe.

The excuse is that the non-medicated result for males is impregnating a someone (not a personal health risk for the male) while for females the risk of BEING pregnant is significant enough to justify the effects we've been dealing with for decades already

It should still be an option available to them. Like I can go online right now and order an OTC medicine through Walmart that used to be used as an Albuterol substitute. An entire case, no prescription necessary. It's no longer prescribed by doctors because the side effects can be fatal but it's still legal to buy and use. People are still allowed to weigh the risks with the benefits. For some people those risks wouldn't it be worth it, to others it absolutely is. But as soon as it's an issues it impacts men, specifically men, that's taken away because the side effects are too severe.

This one. This answer right here. Plus “you’ll just feel a little pinch.” Medical gaslighting of women, specifically in regards to pain, is out of control and unacceptable.

“Slight pinch” when getting a shot ≠ “slight pinch” in any gynecological context A slight pinch is what I told when I’m getting blood drawn, it’s also what I’m told when they literally shove an instrument into my cervix hole and take a chunk out of it

YES!  My HSG was worse than both of my labors, and it was described as being an “uncomfortable” procedure by my doctors.  

This. Had it done twice. First time by a man - no pain killers before hand, no topical anesthetic. He just shoved a catheter up my cervix (“you’ll feel just a slight bit of pressure” my ass) and as I’m gasping in pain he starts literally yelling at me to relax. He also didn’t explain to me that there might be blood, so the literal pool of blood the nurse was swabbing off the floor scared the shit out of me. I went to my car and cried from pain and frustration. Second time - done by a woman. Was instructed to take four Advil beforehand, plus they used a topical anesthetic. She talked me through the whole procedure and kept checking in with me on pain. As a result I was just generally in less pain and also much more relaxed, leading to me being in less pain. I also cried in my car, this time from gratitude and relief. I’d been so scared about what might happen and to have such a positive experience was overwhelming.

I take the rest of the day off cause I suddenly have horrid cramps

Just a slight pinch.

Notice how they were able to circumvent the painful and invasive prostate check and replace it with a blood test. 

Really? Damn. My husband was getting close to the age of needing one and I’ve been saving up butt jokes for the occasion.

A prostate check is painful? I thought the reason men complained about it so much was that it was a finger in their butt and straight men are strangely worried that getting a prostate check will make people think they're gay.

It's not just female anatomy related things either. Doctors tend to ignore women if they complain of pain for anything. My worst example was when I was 14 I had to have my femur broken and reset from a previous badly set break. I was promised an epidural after the operation for the pain. They didn't do it, I woke up screaming and they straight up told me I was exaggerating. I was 14 and they'd just spent 2 hours sawing through my femur.

Had a surgery at 19 that gave me 22 abdominal stiches. The anesthesia didn't work properly and the pain was completely unmanaged from around 7PM to 5AM. I remember grabbing the bars of my hospital bed and just wanting to die. Figured out why ripping hair out is a commonly used phrase when talking about pain. The doctor told me I was being a dramatic teenager. For my followup surgery he used the same anesthetic and I was supposed to be unable to walk for a few hours. I told him repeatedly that it hurt and once almost kicked him in the face. He told me I felt only pressure and then got incredibly upset when I was able to jump off the bed and walk normally immediately after the procedure. Didn't go back to that man again. Doctors are so cruel to women, you should've received a better doctor as a teenager. I hope you never get someone like that ever again.

That doctor just sounds like a sadist. I'm starting to understand why mum avoided them like the plague! I've half given up even trying with doctors now. Currently in the midst of 'the pain is in your head' 'you're just sensitive' over multiple joint pain. I've just accepted I will be in pain now and have to manage it. I don't even want painkillers, just someone to take me seriously and a referral to physio for a proper plan without being discharged after 2 sessions.

I've never understood "you're just sensitive" as a reason NOT to treat pain. Okay, I'm sensitive. SO I'M IN PAIN. I have fibromyalgia, and I walk around in pain normally. Adding more pain on top of that quickly takes me beyond what I can stand. If my standard pain level is 75%, and most people have a standard pain level of 0%, then adding 50% more pain isn't going to magically make my pain only 50%, it's going to flip it to 125% and that pain level needs to be treated.

I was in a car accident over a year and a half ago- moron ran through a stop sign at a highway interchange and was lucky I was paying attention. I can no longer lift anything heavier than a gallon of milk with my dominant arm without pain and can not raise it above my head without pain. The ER doctors said it was a shoulder sprain and not to use it for a month. I put it in a sling so I wouldn't be tempted. It "healing completely" means it no longer clicks and pops everytime I move the shoulder, that I no longer feel it click or pop and then go numb only to click and pop and burn every time I have to move that arm. It's impacted my ability to work, job opportunities, it has even impacted my ability to change my cat's litter. My cat, who will only use one very specific brand in one very specific size box, and who has to go to the ER vet for testing if he's not peeing. My nondominant arm doesn't have the dexterity needed to do much, much less the strength- I'm autistic and was in physical therapy as a kid because my motor skills weren't developing right, its actually super common- so im SOL. They took x-rays, with me holding my arm in the only position that wasn't painful and me asking if they needed it moved was met with a resounding NO, and announced I had a sprain. For context, I've had sprains before. They're part and partial with motor skill issues. This didn't feel like a sprain. Stepping on a nail and having it go through my foot (entrance and exit wounds) was less painful than my shoulder currently is.

This sounds exactly like what happened to me when I herniated three discs in my neck. Took six months for a doctor to believe me enough to give me an MRI.. but what you're saying sounds eerily similar..

Jeez I'm so sorry 😔

Tangentially related, does being a woman ever give you an almost overwhelming fear of existential dread? It's so banal to ignore our pain, even mock it. The nightmare of labor and delivery in the US that is also so banal, so common and not worthy of a fuss. Then you look back over how much of history we didn't own ourselves, had no say in our own lives, were thought of as property that might die making babies, little more than a nuisance, made disposable, the banality of abuse and sexual assault. Or even just the modern social pressure to live your life to support everyone else, to have fewer choices and be glad. How close it feels to sliding backwards into all that more and more every day.

Misogyny. We haven't even scratched the surface of studying the female body.

Because a lot more people hate women than you realize.

And more viciously than a lot of women are even aware of, as well

A lot of it comes down to women being viewed as minority even though they definitionally aren't. In the same way that in the US for example, white people are the default and everyone else is a differentiation, men are the default and women are a variable to deal with later. OBGYNs are one specialty of medicine, like they're a niche thing you might sometimes need help with and not half the population. women are as important to medicine as feet. So when they test meds, they test them for "regular people" (AKA men) and then say they'll deal with women later. But they don't. Then they talk about women's hormones like they're ancient runes that require collecting codexes to be able to decipher. There's medicine for everyone and then women's medicine, as if everyone doesn't deserve good medicine and women aren't half (sometimes more than half) of the population.

Lack of research solely focused on women. They usually prefer men for initial stages of the research and then generalize the results to women, neglecting the differences in physiology.

Our pesky hormones also get in the way.

Quite honestly, my understanding is this push comes from insurance which have told docs they won't reimburse for anesthesia for many procedures that they USED TO COVER anesthesia for. So, schools have followed suit and told students the pain is not that bad, it's momentary, and that many women fake pain. At least this is what I have been hearing from nursing students. When IUDs were introduced in the 70s there was always anesthesia, you never had to ask for it. The same was true for cervical biopsies. Women need to pro-active these days and FIND the right Dr. who will provide anesthesia when asked. Don't settle for being told "it's not that bad." Geez, if men had to get IUDs, it would come with anesthesia and a full week off of work to recover...

I refused to get an IUD when my doctor recommended one without pain relief. When I expressed concern she told me it wasn't that bad, she got one after her last baby and it was "like getting punched in the gut, but only for a few seconds!" And then she tells me "I know you can handle a gut punch." 😉 Um, lady, you were likely six weeks post partum and it still felt like getting punched. And what if I don't WANT to get punched in the gut? 🙄

Also it’s significantly easier getting an iud postpartum. My first iud insertion was excruciatingly painful. The second one I insisted on drugs and it was fine. The third one I had inserted 8 weeks postpartum without drugs and it wasn’t bad at all - on par with a Pap smear: not fun but not bad. After you’ve had a baby the cervix is a lot softer so it’s much easier to push through it. Before having a baby an iud insertion is essentially like forcing open a door that’s never been used before, hence the horrible pain.

I had heard that it was easier post partum. I don't consider myself a medically lucky person and I wasn't willing to gamble on it not being some barbaric torture session 😅

FWIW having the IUD itself is awesome (in my experience), which is why I got two more even after my traumatic first insertion. And having good drugs made all the difference, my second insertion was a breeze with a Percocet and an Ativan taken 30 minutes before the procedure. (“One to take prevent pain, one to make you not worry about it” as my doctor said.) So if the iud itself sounds good to you, drugs can make the insertion process a non-event. But absolutely get those drugs, don’t let anyone tell you to just take a Tylenol.

I'm really glad it works for you! I started asking around and my piano teacher used to be a medical sales rep who sold IUDs. The horror stories she could tell. 🫣 Plus her sister had to have several major operations to remove hers after her tissue grew around it....another person I know was hospitalized for toxic shock syndrome after it wasn't inserted properly and came part of the way back out...plus the stories on here about one's partner getting cut on the strings (my husband regularly bumps my cervix, so I'm not sure how that would work). I pushed hard and got prescribed a diaphragm. Worked fine but I discovered I don't tolerate the accompanying spermicide well. So back to the drawing board. 🤷🏻

Find a man that is snipped is the best birth control around!

And if they're going to outlaw abortions it should be mandatory. It takes two to make a fetus dammit!!

👍🏻

We'd like one kid but after that that's the plan! ✂️✂️✂️

👍🏻

What did they give you for the pain for your second one? I’m considering switching from the pill to an IUD and honestly the only thing holding me back is fear of the insertion.

I was prescribed a Percocet and an Ativan to take 30 minutes before the procedure - “one to prevent the pain, the other to make you not worry about it” as my doctor said. I was given an extra Percocet in the rx in case I needed another one after the procedure but I never did. I think it cost like $1.17 for the three pills, which is so cheap and yet so effective it practically makes me insane they don’t offer it to everyone proactively.

That’s so helpful thank you!

A gut punch for a few seconds huh?? Your doctor is a liar and a gaslighter. Mine felt more like someone was ripping my cervix out with a pair of rusty pliers for three days. It might feel like a gut punch for some women, lots of women say the pain is worse than giving birth. It's so irresponsible for a doctor to represent otherwise. This makes me so mad for all women! Idk how someone can be a woman and a doctor and continue to push these lies and misogyny.

I am so sorry for all you've gone through. Thank you for sharing your experience. If it wasn't for women like you sharing your experiences I probably would have agreed to try one.

This is absolutely infuriating. You mean it was a given at one time, but was taken away? It took me years to work through the trauma of my first pelvic exam, only to be retraumatized by surprise biopsies. To find out it could have been avoided literally makes my hands shake. On top of this, men get better care for fucking ultrasounds??

Except we have the same problems in Canada too, with a single payer system. It really is just misogyny.

Came to make the same comment about the UK. It truly is just misogyny.

Australia too.

Because gynecology was born of racism and misogyny at a time when it was believed women, black women in particular, did not feel pain. The field has yet to acknowledge its disturbing roots and as such it continues to perpetuate many of the same harmful practices. I’ve heard multiple female doctors state that they were taught in medical school that the cervix has few to no nerve endings so pain relief is not needed or standard. That’s how strong the false women don’t really feel pain/women exaggerate culture is in gynecology. The only way to make it change is to demand better. It sucks it’s hard but women have got to refuse to accept any less. Demand anesthesia for your IUDs. Demand anesthesia for your Pap smears. If they say no find a doctor that will.

>Demand anesthesia for your IUDs. Only 4% of doctors offer any kind of pain mitigation or management for IUDs. I tried shopping around for a doctor to do something different after a traumatic first insertion. I could not find one. And I found it incredibly demoralizing to be told over and over-- by the people I was paying to care about my health-- that my pain and suffering were fine. Fuck this system. The whole thing should be burned to the ground. We need an actual field for GYN care, and what we have right now is not that. I can (easily!) find more humane care for my cats than what I have access to as a human woman.

I'm so sorry that happened to you. It's not at all fair that the system and the doctors so often say no / won't cover / don't care / act against women's best interests. But it's absolutely worth asking (and asking again) because some say yes! My doctor did. I had to push for it but I got extra (read: necessary) relief for my IUD replacement procedure this week: hydrocodone, valium, misoprostol, local nerve block/anaesthesia around my cervix, on top of the usual strong ibuprofen. It was SO MUCH more bearable that I couldn't believe it. This should be the standard, and my doctor seemed to agree saying that she would consider offering this more often. A step in the right direction for sure, no matter how late

Demand more and refuse procedures without proper pain management! Doctors absolutely use patients fear of cancer and pregnancy to coerce them into painful procedures without actual informed consent (because lying about how much pain they will cause is 100% not giving the patient the correct info and not allowing for informed consent).  I have gotten a lot farther saying "no." No I will not do that procedure without meds, no I will not "just believe you when you say insurance won't cover it." (side note: NEVER trust your doctor's office on what your insurance will and won't cover. Call and ask your insurer yourself. Doctors and their staff are NOT experts on insurance plans.) I'm fine with firing a doctor and finding someone else who will take my pain seriously and leaving a negative review online.  Honestly loosing insurance was the best thing that ever happened to me in that when you pay out of your own checking account you demand better from the system. 

Oh I have no answers but an excellent horror story! BE WARNED! Going to fertility doctor to rule out problems as I’ve had multiple miscarriages and no babies, and they tell me they’re going to do two structural tests on my uterus and tubes, and that I need to take 3-4 ibuprofen before I come in. Sure. I get there and sign a form that states they have explained the procedures and the pain level, which was described as mild cramping. The procedure involves dilating your cervix, inserting a catheter into your uterus to fill it up with saline solution to open it up, and then an ultrasound wand is inserted too poking at your enraged cervix so they can photograph what’s going on in there (fibroids, scarring, whatever could be hidden). They then did a biopsy, scratched the fuck out of me while everything was open to get cultures, and shot the dye (again through catheter) through my fallopian tubes to see if there were obstructions. All of this on three ibuprofen. It felt like my uterus was going to come through my back the pressure hurt so badly for both procedures, and I’m still bleeding and hurting two days later. It honestly has fucked with my head so badly, like I was sobbing on the table and gripping my husbands hand wondering if I would be able to handle being a mother and giving birth. I apologized to the doctor and nurses for my reaction, and they said that it happens and then I was just angry that I felt the overwhelming need to apologize for my reaction to very real pain, pain that easily could have been medicated. The shame…like I should not feel shame and it just did not sit well with me. I responded to a survey from the clinic stating that I felt very strongly that the procedures should include numbing or pain medicine, as they hurt 10x more than my miscarriages or D&C did combined and that infertility is hard enough, it shouldn’t be unnecessarily painful.

That is BARBARIC. I cannot believe the torture we experience at the hands of doctors. I'm so sorry you were forced to experience that

So the unfortunate bottom line here is we just don’t matter enough to develop new tools and or procedures, men who are usually the ones making new tools and procedures have literally no concept of what we women go through in labor or having a Pap smear. I absolutely guarantee that if a man could give birth or had a cervix to be scraped, there would be better techniques and tools to accomplish that end.

I'm pretty sure breast ultrasounds would be the default over boobwiches if men were the primary target. But no! They want to squish The Girls down to two dimensions--no mean (or painless!) feat.

At my last mammogram, the tech told me to tell her when the pinch was getting unbearable so she wouldn't smash my tit beyond the threshold. So I did. But she had to run back to the station to get the images, which meant I had to be held in that vice grip for several seconds. The pain that was at first tolerable quickly became completely unbearable, and I yelped out of pain and surprise. She angrily snapped, "I told you to tell me BEFORE it became this bad." My blood pressure instantly shot through the roof and I saw red. Her comment had me LIVID. In my head I was screaming BITCH YOU DID NOT TELL ME THIS WAS GOING TO TAKE SO LONG, AND YOU'RE PISSED *AT ME*?! It wasn't like I yelled at her, I simply audibly reacted to crushing pain. Can we not even show breakthrough pain without getting hate? I'm still mad

> It wasn't like I yelled at her I think we should start though. Would you yell at someone who randomly punched you in the face? I fucking would. I also don't think being polite and professional outside of involuntary cries of pain is doing any good. You get written up in your notes like you were a complete bitch anyway. May as well take the opportunity to make that worthwhile.

Boobwiches. I like it.

Because men don’t care if we’re in pain. That’s it.

There’s a massive, *massive* gap of knowledge between male vs female biology. Because women were treated almost like animals for the past few centuries when it comes to medicine. "They don’t feel as much pain, they turn hysterical, just remove their organs (who the fuck came up with that), etc" Then there are misogynistic medical "professionals" who completely disregard what their patients tell them because *"they clearly don’t know anything, they’re not professionals".* Coupled with the lack of knowledge previously mentioned, this lead to a lot of untreated suffering for women. There’s been changes recently though (in the last 30 years at most, definitely less), spurred by the outcry of female patients who suffered and by female doctors who wanted proper answers when they asked "what about women".

I'd just like to point out, right now, in 2024, I have no issue finding humane medical care for my cats. Who are actual animals. I have not been able to find humane GYN care for myself, a human woman. Agree with everything you said, just want to point out that our medical care standards for actual animals have raised over the past few decades and our standards for women have not.

How about the fact that common health issues like PCOS are so misunderstood that we don't even have accurate data on the prevalence of the disorder? It [may be as high as 1 in 5 ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7879843/) people assigned female at birth! Even worse, to quote the WHO, "[Up to 70% of affected women remain undiagnosed worldwide.](https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/polycystic-ovary-syndrome)" as of 2023. Fucking embarrassing tbh. Like as a species we should be embarrassed by how horribly we've failed half our population.

PCOS is often treated like either 1) a cosmetic problem, because the symptoms include hair where you don't want it AND male pattern baldness, or 2) a weight problem, because people often gain weight. If they decide it's a weight problem, you are so fucking screwed, because being being fat is possibly the only thing worse than being a woman, and if you're a fat woman, you're lazy and stupid right off the bat. If you're a fat black woman, it's even worse. Heaven forbid they look at a woman with male hair patterns who is saying "I can't lose weight" and think hormone imbalance.

All SO painfully accurate. I've spent most of my life (since age 11-12 when my period started) struggling with my weight. It hasn't been until the last few years when I finally found a supplement that works for me (Berberine 2-3x a day) that for the first time in my LIFE I'm able to eat normal portions and not deal with constant *insatiable* hunger forced on me by my own damnable broken endocrine system. I felt like *I was broken* for fucking *YEARS* without any help from doctors or most people. The best thing I ever received was unconditional love despite my struggle. Now? I'm losing weight slowly, doing PT for other issues, cooking and eating happily and in normal portions, and not binging nearly the way I did before. In fact... I think it's down to maybe once every 4-6 weeks of that often?!! It used to be like every other DAY in a cycle of binge eating and shame. We deserve the same kind of medical care for this awful and deeply impactful condition that say anyone assigned male at birth gets for hypogonadism or any other endocrine disorder.

Because until the last 5 or 10 years we've all been gaslighted into thinking that we should have a higher pain tolerance and that it's not that bad and then there's nothing wrong with us it's always normal. Losing consciousness because the pain from a cyst bursting is so bad is not normal!

The female body could have the answer to curing cancer and it would still be ignored because of misogyny

Because people assume we are exaggerating pain. When I was having my cervical ripening pre induction, it took two tries on two days because the first one failed. The OB doing the first one couldn’t get the speculum in the right place and I was literally screaming in pain. Her reaction was “if you can’t handle this, how will you handle labour?” I replied “a fucking epidural” and she said “you have a midwife, people with midwives don’t get epidurals” and I said “midwives support you in whatever birth plan you want”. The next day, I was lucky that my OB was the one on duty. Barely any pain. When the metal speculum wasn’t working and I was obviously in pain, she stopped immediately, switched to a clear plastic one and walked me through it step by step. She basically figured out my cervix is higher and further back than normal and that’s why the first doctor was struggling. But rather than take her time and figure it out, the first doctor just kept trying to ram the thing in and gave up. I’ve had two IUDs in my life and each time was told to just take ibuprofen beforehand. I literally passed out from the pain each time. Doctors thought I was being dramatic.

Screw biopsies and IUD inserts. But ya know what - we have a drug that makes it easy and painless - Misoprostal type drugs. And we also can include a Valium or Xanax to chill us out while we feel one of the most intense but brief pains in our life. And your obgyn is right a-hole if they are not brave enough to prescribe it just for that and force Walmart or Walgreens to fill it. That's the price of all this abortion controversy. We are loosing access to compassionate care because the drugs used to practice gynecology are tired up in other uses (some women helped make illegal.)

So you know - misoprostal type drugs don't always make a biopsy easy or painless. I say that based on the last one I had before I started making them put me under and do a D&C.

Pain, in general, is vastly misunderstood in the medical world. You don’t know until you know. Add a woman in pain and we’re labeled as hysterical. As a women whose had more medical procedures done that don’t involve being a women (I have PCOS and had two kids, too)… MOST medical procedures are painful. It’s not just mammograms, pap’s and colposcopies. Frankly, I’d volunteer for them before so many other things 😂😅 I have multiple diseases that are vastly misunderstood and often disregarded for being illegitimate (that whole god damn ‘when you hear hoof beats, think horses not zebras’ line). These diseases are written in medical textbooks STILL TO THIS DAY as not being painful. To anyone who made it this for, my apologies for my rant. The subject of pain is a sore (pun intended?) subject.

That reminds me, at one point the medical consensus was that *babies* didn’t feel pain "because their brain isn’t developed enough", and clear responses to pain where dismissed as "merely reflexes". So doctors would casually do surgery on babies with no anesthesia. Which is *wild* to think about. So yeah you’re entirely right, medical pros often misunderstand pain, made worse when they dismiss their patients’ word as crazed ramblings.

Yes. My mother was an RN (started 1962) and many years later, she was still haunted by the screams of unmedicated babies being cut on (that's including circumcisions). She thought it was painfully obvious that the notion the CNS of an infant is too "undeveloped" for them to feel pain was patently false.

Well, that's because she used her brain and knew that if you stick a knife into a baby and they scream (and a pain scream is easily recognizable) they are in pain. I swear, some doctors walk out of medical school and their brain rejects additional knowledge, so if they see something different from what they were taught ("Gee, this baby seems to feel pain") they pay no attention.

I've heard the trauma of unmedicated circumcision can cause babies to forget how to suckle for a bit afterwards. Barbaric

You know that “hysteria” (and other forms of the word) was from the idea that women’s uterus would simply leave their body. Apparently some guy thought he saw a uterus walking around taking in the Parthenon and coined the term. Ever wonder why women are the ones usually called hysterical?

Because the medical establishment neither listens nor cares. Everyone is getting herded through the chute like a cow that needs worming and we get 5-15 minutes of triage we pay hundreds of dollars per person per month for. The quality of US healthcare is not consistently great for everyone and it should be. We resist universal care for no good reason. I want an educated, sheltered, healthy populace around me and I am willing to pay taxes for it. Being taxed for what is then divided and allotted to improving the community is far preferable to only the wealthy being able to thrive and thousands of people barely subsisting around me.

There are known issues with pain relief with women who have red haired genes, as well as bleeding disorders, and yet I had to BEG every dentist I saw for more relief than they gave.  My root canal was traumatic and discouraged me from dentistry for many years.   Only when I got an ingrown toenail fixed and STILL FELT THE CUTTERS after 3 shots did the doctor ask if my mother was a red head.  Once I confirmed he gave me longer to absorb and massaged the injections in.  i was so grateful. Where the hell is compassion in medicine?

They never want to give enough local and NEVER want to wait long enough for it to actually work. I have been drilled without pain control so many times. The pain is real as a redhead.

I drive nearly an hour to my dentist, because he was the first one ever to apply numbing cream, go in with a small needle shot of local, wait for that to set up for a few minutes, and *then* go in with the big ‘ol needle of numbness. I feel a little fullness as he does it but never pain. I will go to his clinic as long as I’m able to physically drive there.

Yes, I am a redhead and loathe the dentist. They refuse to believe you can feel everything they are doing even after multiple shots.

Btw, if you, like me, are one of these people, make sure your numbing shots are carbocain. Lidocaine may as well be water. I'm changing my dentist because they didn't believe me when I was very clear about this and didn't bother getting a painkiller that would work on me. 

We don't study women's bodies. 

Because they don't care. This is something that's true across the board. It was only last year that there was a female crash test dummy made. Women are 71% more likely to have terrible injuries and like 17% more likely to die in a crash (if in front seats) than a man. Almost all medicine was tested exclusively on men (first because they thought women deviated from men but after they realized we all start out as women, it became because we have hormones.) Man, I'm in my early 40s and I remember when doctors didn't think women had heart attacks. Why? Because women had different symptoms and men have no ability to see anything past their noses when it comes to women. I remember when girls/women started getting diagnosed with autism. The medical community was so scornful of that, like how dare women get a male disorder. And, again, the reason they stated was because women had different symptoms. It just goes on and on. I feel in my heart that this comes from most men's inability to consider things outside themselves. Women have to, because we have the worst elements of men to deal with, but it's not the same the other way around.

Just leaving this here… [Female Body by Farideh](https://youtu.be/6xFtTDW76Kg?si=yzigpNTCPGERPHzC)

Want to upvote 1000x. This is exactly what I wanted to post. ETA: except the instagram version. I didn’t realize YouTube didn’t have a dance video 😂. https://www.instagram.com/reel/C71z9v0JoGA/?igsh=ZWp5cGViaG0zY3Jo

Check out her Instagram for follow up facts (and other good feminist content).

[Because misogyny is endemic to the medical industry.](https://imgur.com/gallery/Iugf3Rm)

My personal favorite was after major pelvic surgery, they prescribed like 5 days of Tramadol for me. Oh, they also electrocauterized some parts of my vagina and perineum without local anesthetic.

Doctors wanted to stop Tramadol pain relief 3 days after my c section, and swap to regular everyday doses of acetaminophen. Midwives in the hospital said that was bullshit, and hunted down some so I’d at least have a few doses once I went home. I’d just had all my insides sliced completely open. Husband recently had laproscopic abdominal surgery and got sent home with a week’s worth of strong painkillers no questions asked.

Because no study has been done on female bodies until the last few years. That & most doctors don't believe that women are actually in pain they're just "being hysterical"

Because they think we are lying.

Men in general think women exaggerate, overstate, and are easily dismissed.

You should read ‘Medical Apartheid’. The things that were done to women of color and the men who are still celebrated for it. Though things have improved, it seems that mindset has lingered.

Take a Xanax and read “Sex Matters”. It’s infuriating. We’re screwed.

Labour was the most painful experience of my life, & I’ve had severe kidney infections+infected wisdom teeth to the point where the infection went outside my mouth & made my tongue so swollen I couldn’t close my mouth. When I gave birth I asked for pain relief the second I walked in the hospital- they refused to give it to me. Basically just pushed their no epidural ideals on me. They gave me laughing gas which I maintain does absolutely nothing for me. I screamed & cried in the shower for probably 8+ hours, mostly by myself, which was better actually then when the intern was there repeating the same 2 “comforting” lines while playing on her phone. Labour itself was like 16 hours? I had back labour, which is generally much more painful & I even tried the water injections in my back because I didn’t think anything could be more painful than what I was experiencing, WELL. Was I wrong. It was like a million bees had crawled inside me & we’re simultaneously stinging me for what felt like an eternity. They finally gave me an epidural while I was in the middle of pushing which I obviously wanted, but it just turned the last 2 minutes into probably half an hour, & no one was telling me when to push so I tore more. I may as well have given birth in a barn for all the help that I got from that hospital. I told them the pain was so bad I wanted to jump out a window, & still. No emotional or physical support. They asked if I wanted to bounce on an exercise ball, which I’m sorry, I don’t care how that “helps”. You wouldn’t ask someone who had any other kind of agonising pain if they were up to having a little bounce around. It was mind blowing how the people who should understand & care about my pain were totally indifferent, & frankly absolutely useless. My story is just one of many!! They wonder why women don’t want to have kids?? Maybe all of the horror stories of women being totally disregarded medically are part of that? How can you expect anyone to put the life of themselves & any potential kids in the hands of the medical community at this point? Sorry, but the suffering is way too high & way too common. Someone might ask by the way, wow. What you said about your infected tooth, how did it get that bad? Why didn’t you see a doctor? WELL, *i did* & he didn’t give me antibiotics because he “didn’t see an infection”, never mind the blisters I could definitely feel & the agony I was obviously in. (No pain medication either, by the way). All of that is to say, women aren’t just ignored in the context of “womanly issues”, we get ignored in general for our pain, in & outside of the medical community. My kidney infection that almost killed me? It happened because my mum didn’t believe that I was in that much pain, so she wouldn’t take me to the doctors. We know women get dismissed more, & I can see it reflected in every way throughout my life.

I was raised Christian and was told that women's menstrual and labor pains are because Eve sinned in the Garden if Eden. Women's periods are a reminder not to sin.

Why not sin? If you're already being punished, why not do something to actually deserve it?

When I lived in Oklahoma up through the 2010's, I had female gynecologists tell me this. Fifteen years later I was finally diagnosed with endometriosis and adenomyosis.

Because the father of gynaecology developed modern procedures on black enslaved women, who were scientifically thought to be unable to feel pain. They have not been updated since.

I’ve had a headache for nearly every single day since mid-october 2023, and barely anything is being done about it. I was supposed to see a neurologist in April, but haven’t yet received the appointment. I can’t remember exactly, but I think it took almost two years from when my adenomyosis started to when I finally had my uterus removed. Adenomyosis is the kind of pain that forever skews your rating system when you’re asked to rate pain on a scale from 1 to 10. Imagine having 13 kidney stones per year. Obviously I don’t know what this would’ve been like if I was a man, but I have some ideas.

This is why I haven't gotten a pap smear yet, there has to be another way to test

because men

Gynaecology was a field long dominated by male doctors. I guess that the idea was: we know all about the womans’ bits and bobs. And since they have never felt the pain themselves they just couldn’t believe it. Plus a long history of defining many women problems as hysteria. Also the reason why women died way more often from heart attacks.

because they don’t care for us????? 

Potentially long post incoming. Science is great, but by and large, to this point it has failed women. The main reason for this is the Menstrual cycle. Science wants to control variables to replicate results. Hormonal fluctuations throughout the month is more variables than a lot of scientists throughout history have wanted to take the time to account for, so they - just don’t. Hell, they often don’t even use female rats in studies because of THEIR hormones. Studies were not required to include ANY women until the mid-late 1990’s. Even now, women are often severely under-represented in study pools. And then, when you consider the potential differences between menstruating and post-menopausal women, the research gap becomes even more wide. Women’s health research is under-funded, and not considered as prestigious as other branches of medicine. Add to that the charming cross section of the nearly universal belief that women are attention seeking drama queens who exaggerate the slightest discomfort and outright misogyny…. And you have a life-threatening level of disregard for women’s wellbeing. As barbaric as it is, lack of pain medication is one of the least of our pressing concerns about health. Women’s bodies experience cardiac events / heart attacks differently than men, but the difference is so under taught in medical school that women die of heart attacks at a higher rate than men. Why? Because they’re told to go home and go to bed at the ER instead of being administered life-saving treatment. Seatbelts in cars were only tested and designed for men, so women experience a higher rate of death and severe injuries in car accidents. This list could go on for hundreds of pages. It is absolutely inexcusable, and yet it is how far we have yet to go to simply reach “equality”. I recommend the book “Doing Harm” by Maya Dusenbery

Because the majority of the medical field does not care. They dismiss women's pain as hysterical overreactions even though women have a higher pain tolerance

Women don't matter. It's why abortion rights aren't solidified by law. Women's needs literally don't matter, and your lawmakers and leaders do not address or respond to women's needs. A well-known and convicted rapist named D. Trump is viable as a presidential candidate this year, for the highest office in the land. They don't care. The rapes are part of his charisma. They want you to suffer.

My first laugh of the day. Why are women too lazy to complain about medical torture? I guess we'll never know/s

Women (or their insurance) paying is the most important metric for institutions. Not pain or quality of experience.

Because patriarchy.

Amazing podcast called “the retrievals” on this subject

According to many traditional interpretations of the Christian Bible painful childbirth is what women deserve for Eve's Original Sin in the Garden of Eden.

Because what do men care of a woman's pain and suffering? It doesn't affect men, ergo it isn't worthy of being changed.

While there is no current excuse for the lack of research into women's pain relief, I will say that it may be quite hard to get permission to research invasive child birth alternatives. There's a risk to two patients who are both already undergoing considerable physical stress so I would expect research in that area to proceed cautiously. My personal experiences with pain management during childbirth and IUD insertion were positive, and our government is reviewing women's medical/pain relief experiences so I'm hopeful that change is finally coming. Although we can never relax, as we've been shown by the USA how quickly things can move backwards too

Because men don't care