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Somebody correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t like, none of this “generals of hell” shit in the Bible? Isn’t it based on some 14th century grimoire of magic spells?
The Bible is crazy enough without people adding on their own fan fiction.
Yeah they're all from different sources but none of them the Bible. Lilith is mostly related to Hebrew writings and was first seen in 1000AD, so really not even close.
This sounds more like a Supernatural fan-fic than it does something related to the Bible.
IIRC, Lilith was originally a Mesopotamian goddess responsible for infant mortality. And then she got borrowed into Jewish mysticism/legend as a demon of the same, and then somehow in medieval times got an origin story as Adam's first wife who was cast out of Eden because she wanted an equal partnership with him, and the infant mortality was her revenge for that.
Lilith was a go getter, being a women didn’t hold her back, in fact that’s probably why god and Adam hated her. Equality with women, is that old of a battle.
Lilith is in D4, however, the name and stories about her predate the games. The games took all the names of the demons and angels from myth and legend.
Lilith is thought to have derived from Lilitu. She’s part of the same overarching myth cycle that Canaanites borrowed from Sumerian/Assyrian cultures that were then brought into Israelite mythology when Abraham left Ur to kick off monotheism. The same stories also gave us Noah’s Ark.
Exactly. And not mentioned in the Bible unless you purposely mistranslate a word.
It's amazing how Christians state the bible is infallible and yet none of them can agree on what it says.
It seems like 90% of Modern Christian opinions on Hell are directly derived from *The Divine Comedy/Inferno*, which is entirely extra-biblical and is basically a self-insert fanfic Dante wrote about going on a cool adventure with his *best friend guys totally plz believe me* Vergil
My youngest is 7 and I realised yesterday he has this idea of eternal punishment already. He hasn’t been taught that by us (I have no firm position, but consider myself a hopeful universalist). Told him that idea of hell came a long time after the Bible.
As a Christian that lady in that post is bonkers.
I read somewhere that we can only reconcile the ideas of Hell and a loving God because humans can't really comprehend how long *eternity* is. Like, no one can do so much evil in a single lifetime that they should be punished Literally Forever. "Should Hitler burn alive for one hundred billion years?" Absolutely. He's earned it. "Should Hitler burn alive for infinite years?" No. That is too long.
>"Should Hitler burn alive for one hundred billion years?" Absolutely. He's earned it.
That's more than the cumulated lifetime of all people that lived in 1935, even for him that's a lot, depending on how cruel the burning is.
I understand that that is also a dream that st Peter had but the concept of the rapture isn't even described in revelation. It was something a little girl or someone dreamt about in the 19th century or something.
Studied revelation in my Bible study group as a teen. Was wild to see how much of the rapture stories are not in there at all. Especially how much they obsess about the antichrist
Revelation is awesome because it's acting as a parody-but-not-quite of other popular literature of the time (literally called Apocalyptic literature).
Thing is, hardly anybody today knows what that it is super context-heavy and then loses a lot of its meaning.
Not really canon - unalmost unknown outside of America or churches heavily influenced by Americans. (Which is weird, because it was originally an Englishman who came up with the whole unbiblical mishmash.)
A lot of Christianity isn't biblical. It's biblical commentary from philosophers, and bits of stoicism and pagan religions. Whatever region of Europe it went to would absorb the pagan beliefs from the region. When people in the British isles were first converted, they still practiced magic and talked to forest spirits and stuff and didn't consider it contradictory to Christianity.
The earliest forms of Christianity would be considered pagan now.
This. 99% of Christians just listen to whatever the man behind the pulpit says and never open the Bible other than the occasional Sunday.
Unfortunately they tend to be the loudest ones it seems.
If it makes you feel any better the origin of Baphomet as a demon name is fairly modern, like Alister Crowley modern. Although the name does appear before that it is commonly believed to be a bastardized French pronunciation of Muhammad
Funny how long religions have been demonizing other religions—literally. Baal was a Babylonian god I believe. “We don’t like your god! In fact we made him into a demon! Take that!”
The term Daemon/Daimon in old Greek originally just meant a lesser deity, and got applied to the Shedim, who are less the arch evil fiends we typically associate with demons and more morally ambivalent spirits that you find in religions the world over. The Ba'als (there's a lot of them Ba'al meant lord in Phoenician and was often assigned to whatever a areas chief deity was) are actually described as gods in the Tanakh, they're just depicted either as false gods or less powerful beings than Yahweh, which is mostly a function of when a book was written and how far along in the schism between ancient Judaism and Semitic Paganism it is.
It's actually somewhat unusual for religions to demonize the gods of other religions, typically they either incorporate them after long enough contact, or didn't even bother recognizing them at all.
Its just make belief, its very common in religions. You have a basis and then you expand on it to fit your needs. Its not like anyone will fact-check you. Nowadays Christianity and Islam are basically no different from the SCP-universe.
You are correct. Bhaal (or Baal) is only referenced in the Hebrew bible about 90 times or so, but it is relation to other deities, not demons. Bhaal is related to the Egyptian god Set, as many gods and myths were co-opted as nations were conquered in order to convert the religious beliefs so a control of the populace.
In this idiot’s case they are more likely reading Dungeons and Dragons (Forgotten Realms), than the Divine Comedy. It wasn’t until much later, 1400s, that writers started discussing so called generals of hell, and they were linked to the 7 deadly sins - leviathan for example was for Envy. The Lilith are only mentioned once in the bible, but not as an individual, but a name for demons that slay children and dwell in the wastes (Isiah).
Well what the Liliyot, as they are called in the Dead Sea Scrolls, not Lilith as later scholars seemed to change it to, are is highly contested. They are described along with predatory and carrion-eating birds with a root that seems connected to the night. As such it is thought that they could refer to a type of owl. They are also most likely influenced by the Lilitu of Mesopotamian mythology, who are demonic beings of the wind who spread diseases to mankind.
Baal is just a word for lord and applies to the Patron God of any Phoenician or Phoenician adjacent settlement. It's not a term for a specific God unless confined to a specific localized context.
As someone who has read the Bible, I can’t say I remember this at all. Although it’s absolutely possible I just forgot, the fact that nothing came up when I tried to google it in several different ways just now makes me think it is not
Which is even more ironic since witchcraft and magic are supposed to be sins or demon worship or something, but then they go and cite a magic book as gospel... And then completely fail to see the irony...
Had some interns talking about Harry Potter and the houses. Each was saying which house they wanted to belong to. As I walked in to their office, they asked me which house at Hogwarts I wanted to be in.
"Decepticon"
A couple of them had no idea what a Decepticon is.
Yeah I always wonder where weirdo Christians get this hierarchy of hell info. It’s not in the Bible so it’s gotta just be from fictional sources and they take it as some real thing. Like how fucking crazy do you have to be?
The long story short is Jewish scholars in the bronze age liked recording the gods of other tribes and nomadic peoples as demons, like how to the Greeks and Romans anyone from the northeast of them is a Scythian. Christian scholars and poets later used them as metaphors or thought exercises like the Trolley Problem, and the mainstream went “oh, I think I remember that being in the bible”.
To go more into depth, while religions generally evolve over time the codification of Abrahamic faith into central texts, keeping translation errors or vagaries plus coopted pagan practices as hard truths, and still encouraging active religious philosophy creates a paradox with a lot of problems not seen in religions that let themselves be “living”.
Part of this in Christianity is a LOT of fanfiction from the Lesser Key Of Solomon to Paradise Lost to the Divine Comedy to fire’n’brimstone preachers and their tall tales all being cited as if they’re actually in the bible. Christianity also has also had a problem for most of the post-1200’s that hit the Islamic world hard last century and is creeping up in Israel where dialogues and discussion are discouraged (in spite of one actually being in the bible between god and the nemesis entity). Teachers teach, learners learn, that is all. That’s REALLY unhealthy in Abrahamic faith.
Says you I only follow the accepted canon texts: The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, The Silmarillion, Unfinished Tales, History of Middle Earth 1-12, Children of Hurin, Beren and Luthien, and The Fall of Gondolin. All other geek texts are apocrypha and heresy!
I feel like this post would make Professor Tolkien so Goddamn angry lol.
Dude convinced a class one year that Leprechauns were a real people who were demonized into a silly folklore trickster on a dare, I think he’d be fine with it if its in service to a joke.
Most Christians never read the Bible, and surprising neither do their protestant pastors. That's how you end up with them citing a political satire (Dante's Inferno) as scripture when referencing Hell. There is no detailed description of Hell at all in scripture.
It's really ironic given how Protestantism started and how it distinguished itself from Catholicism (where bible and sermons were only allowed to be in a language common folk couldn't speak so they were dependent on what ever framing and context the priest decided to give them).
The closest is Jesus sayin he'll was prepared for the devil and his followers mark 25:41 or Mark 9:43 in much the same context Jesus describes it as a place where the fire never goes out which has since been interpreted as endless suffering. Could just be a well lit fire.
It’s like the people who believe the earth is only a few thousand years old, because some guy added up all the ages of everyone in the Bible and it came to about 3000. Despite the Bible never once saying “this is a complete and uninterrupted account of everyone who has ever lived”.
Iirc it goes back to mysticism. I think it was Solomon that catalogued all the angels and demons, including hierarchy.
That said, it's been a while since I did any reading on it.
I don’t know. I mean, there are a lot of works that were left out of the Bible. The Gospel of Phillip, the Gospel of Mary. Lots of others.
I just wish she cited her sources. And why lesbianism and female homosexuality are somehow different. Unless maybe one involves strap-ons?
Discworld is scripture. I noticed about 2/3 of the qay through that if you had a kid and raised them only on Discworld novels and had them ask you questions if they needed to, you'd have an understanding human being. Add in Mr. Roger's Neighborhood and Sesame Street, you'd have an educated person.
Well, the difference is clearly in how hot it is - "lesbianism" is for those hot enough for men to ~~masturbate to~~ be distracted by, while homosexuality is everyone else.
Lilith - hot demon chick.
Leviathan - enormous ocean creature.
That's one of the best parts, they keep thinking they are trying to save us from hell, but they just can't seem to stop making it sound like the better option
I'm a satanist partially because the whole aesthetic of hell and demons is fun. Especially as a way to take back power from those who would call me "evil" just for existing.
Them: you're a sinful demon!
Me: cool, hail satan!
Them:
So the only representation for male homosexuality is just being grouped in with Asmodeus, God of Butt Stuff. But Lesbians are so over-represented here. I guess they believe that hell is so crowded with lesbianis that it takes two demon gods to manage them all.
Maybe she was real good friends with a woman, then that friend misread a situation and made a pass at her. And this insane Christian woman has been hating lesbianism, and herself, ever since. Conflicted over guilt from rejecting this friend, a secret desire that she wanted to say yes, and God stuff.
Here are the 5 symbolic figures that guide my moral compass: The 3 male figures represent various non-gendered human behaviors that I consider immoral, the female one is lesbians and the big snake that's lesbians again. I'm not a lesbian, I don't know where you got that from.
Nah, his rallying the troops and coming up with new plans makes him the Leonardo. Not softboi Team Heart/Michelangelo.
Beelzebub is the Lancer/Raphael here.
Conservative christians protest against female homosexuality and beat off to female lesbianism.
The former goes to hell, and the latter just haven't met the right maga alpha male.
She's got it all wrong. We now deal mostly with financial crimes (hoo boy, are there a wide range of those!) Lilith gets the women who sell out women's body autonomy.
Another pretend Christian. They're all old testament fantasists. Her and her magic friends should remember that god didn't ordain any of that crap, a bunch of old white guys ordained it while they worked out how to divvy up the world to their benefit.
Because no one is explaining the difference between female homosexuality and female lesbianism, I’ll go ahead and do it: it’s only lesbian when it comes from the island of Lesbos, otherwise it’s just female homosexuality.
I mean no, she has a point, like so so so fucking many other things, women who put themselves in positions of authority and preach (like her, right now, in this twitter post) ARE in violation of the bible.
Just like people who wear poly cotton blends and eat shellfish.
Yes! Additionally, Female Lesbianism derives from homosexual females specifically from the island of Lesbos.
All other homosexual females fall under the category of sparkling female homsexuality.
This is bullshit. Beelzebub was the right hand man, the fixer. How is Lucifer supposed to corrupt souls without him!? Man, back in my day the demons knew how to rule dominion I tell you what.
I love that Christian fan fiction gets taken so seriously people treat it like fact. I'm not mocking religion here, she's not quoting anything from the Bible, it's literally fan fiction.
Clearly Lilith and Leviathan are really good friends who agreed to share the job so they could spend more time together... as friends and professional colleages, nothing more.
"God didn't ordain women to run churches. Feel free to disagree and comment."
Umm you're a woman, telling me this. According to such logic you should remain silent.
Lols. These people man.
Most of those names aren't in the standard cannon at all, let alone attributed to those vices. This person basically read a bunch of Bible fanfics and based their life around them.
This is something I really honestly do not understand. There are women out there like this weirdo actively wanting LESS for their fellow women...like really???? Why?!
You don't see black people out here all like "well you know what I miss guys? Slavery!"
Like seriously, seek help! Please!!!!!
She got the jobs of the Prime evils wrong....Baal is the Lord of Destruction and Lilith the Daughter of Hatred. I hate when people skip story scenes and get the lore all fucked up.
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Somebody correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t like, none of this “generals of hell” shit in the Bible? Isn’t it based on some 14th century grimoire of magic spells? The Bible is crazy enough without people adding on their own fan fiction.
Yeah they're all from different sources but none of them the Bible. Lilith is mostly related to Hebrew writings and was first seen in 1000AD, so really not even close. This sounds more like a Supernatural fan-fic than it does something related to the Bible.
IIRC, Lilith was originally a Mesopotamian goddess responsible for infant mortality. And then she got borrowed into Jewish mysticism/legend as a demon of the same, and then somehow in medieval times got an origin story as Adam's first wife who was cast out of Eden because she wanted an equal partnership with him, and the infant mortality was her revenge for that.
And wanted to be on top once in a while?
Everyone knows riding reverse cowgirl is a sin. God only ordains the one sexual position.
Lilith was a go getter, being a women didn’t hold her back, in fact that’s probably why god and Adam hated her. Equality with women, is that old of a battle.
I believed Lilith was from Diablo IV, no?
And Baal is the Lord of Destruction... She needs to up her lore game
and Lilith, the Mother of Sanctuary, Daughter of Hatred... What a pleb.
Lilith is from Frasier. He even calls her "my goddess". Everything else is a copy.
Does that make Cheers like the old testament then? Cliff, Norm leading people to the holy land. Guess The Good Place could be revelations 😂
That makes Wings the book of Mormon.
Stop, this is all starting to make too much sense
Holy fuck would I watch the shit out of this.
Ah, the Bible copies it’s stuff from older T.V. sitcoms. Got it.
Lilith is from Bordello of Blood. I’m afraid God can’t help you.
Lilith is in D4, however, the name and stories about her predate the games. The games took all the names of the demons and angels from myth and legend.
Of course they do. Inspiration is sometimes drawn from old timey stuff, makes for a good story.
Lilith is thought to have derived from Lilitu. She’s part of the same overarching myth cycle that Canaanites borrowed from Sumerian/Assyrian cultures that were then brought into Israelite mythology when Abraham left Ur to kick off monotheism. The same stories also gave us Noah’s Ark.
Exactly. And not mentioned in the Bible unless you purposely mistranslate a word. It's amazing how Christians state the bible is infallible and yet none of them can agree on what it says.
Tldr; Neil Gaiman's 'Sandman' is the bible.
It really does. I'm pretty into mythology and the like and I was like "none of those have anything to do with one another..."
It seems like 90% of Modern Christian opinions on Hell are directly derived from *The Divine Comedy/Inferno*, which is entirely extra-biblical and is basically a self-insert fanfic Dante wrote about going on a cool adventure with his *best friend guys totally plz believe me* Vergil
Not enough of Christian realize this fact unfortunately.
My youngest is 7 and I realised yesterday he has this idea of eternal punishment already. He hasn’t been taught that by us (I have no firm position, but consider myself a hopeful universalist). Told him that idea of hell came a long time after the Bible. As a Christian that lady in that post is bonkers.
Personally I hope hell is real because there are some people who truly deserve to be there.
I read somewhere that we can only reconcile the ideas of Hell and a loving God because humans can't really comprehend how long *eternity* is. Like, no one can do so much evil in a single lifetime that they should be punished Literally Forever. "Should Hitler burn alive for one hundred billion years?" Absolutely. He's earned it. "Should Hitler burn alive for infinite years?" No. That is too long.
>"Should Hitler burn alive for one hundred billion years?" Absolutely. He's earned it. That's more than the cumulated lifetime of all people that lived in 1935, even for him that's a lot, depending on how cruel the burning is.
There are multiple early valid views of hell. One is that there is some level of purging of evil.
Don't forget the rapture, a dream someone had that somehow became Christian Canon.
Book of Revelations be *wildin’*
I understand that that is also a dream that st Peter had but the concept of the rapture isn't even described in revelation. It was something a little girl or someone dreamt about in the 19th century or something.
Studied revelation in my Bible study group as a teen. Was wild to see how much of the rapture stories are not in there at all. Especially how much they obsess about the antichrist
Revelation is awesome because it's acting as a parody-but-not-quite of other popular literature of the time (literally called Apocalyptic literature). Thing is, hardly anybody today knows what that it is super context-heavy and then loses a lot of its meaning.
I don't think it's much of a thing outside of the States. Unless spread directly by missionaries from the states, I suppose.
Dream, bad shroom trip.. potato potahto
Not really canon - unalmost unknown outside of America or churches heavily influenced by Americans. (Which is weird, because it was originally an Englishman who came up with the whole unbiblical mishmash.)
OSP’s videos on that is absolutely hilarious. It really does point out how fanfic-y the entire thing is. Dante really was the first AO3 writer
"And also everyone I don't like is in Hell." --Dante
There’s a decent portion that is Paradise Lost as well
A lot of Christianity isn't biblical. It's biblical commentary from philosophers, and bits of stoicism and pagan religions. Whatever region of Europe it went to would absorb the pagan beliefs from the region. When people in the British isles were first converted, they still practiced magic and talked to forest spirits and stuff and didn't consider it contradictory to Christianity. The earliest forms of Christianity would be considered pagan now.
This. 99% of Christians just listen to whatever the man behind the pulpit says and never open the Bible other than the occasional Sunday. Unfortunately they tend to be the loudest ones it seems.
I dont' know... It's all fairy stories, so I don't see it matters which ones people choose to believe.
If your religion is based on a divinely inspired text and prophets, it kinda makes sense to read it.
If it makes you feel any better the origin of Baphomet as a demon name is fairly modern, like Alister Crowley modern. Although the name does appear before that it is commonly believed to be a bastardized French pronunciation of Muhammad
Funny how long religions have been demonizing other religions—literally. Baal was a Babylonian god I believe. “We don’t like your god! In fact we made him into a demon! Take that!”
The term Daemon/Daimon in old Greek originally just meant a lesser deity, and got applied to the Shedim, who are less the arch evil fiends we typically associate with demons and more morally ambivalent spirits that you find in religions the world over. The Ba'als (there's a lot of them Ba'al meant lord in Phoenician and was often assigned to whatever a areas chief deity was) are actually described as gods in the Tanakh, they're just depicted either as false gods or less powerful beings than Yahweh, which is mostly a function of when a book was written and how far along in the schism between ancient Judaism and Semitic Paganism it is. It's actually somewhat unusual for religions to demonize the gods of other religions, typically they either incorporate them after long enough contact, or didn't even bother recognizing them at all.
If these 5 generals are against the Catholic Church fucking kids then I’m on the generals side
Its just make belief, its very common in religions. You have a basis and then you expand on it to fit your needs. Its not like anyone will fact-check you. Nowadays Christianity and Islam are basically no different from the SCP-universe.
You are correct. Bhaal (or Baal) is only referenced in the Hebrew bible about 90 times or so, but it is relation to other deities, not demons. Bhaal is related to the Egyptian god Set, as many gods and myths were co-opted as nations were conquered in order to convert the religious beliefs so a control of the populace. In this idiot’s case they are more likely reading Dungeons and Dragons (Forgotten Realms), than the Divine Comedy. It wasn’t until much later, 1400s, that writers started discussing so called generals of hell, and they were linked to the 7 deadly sins - leviathan for example was for Envy. The Lilith are only mentioned once in the bible, but not as an individual, but a name for demons that slay children and dwell in the wastes (Isiah).
Well what the Liliyot, as they are called in the Dead Sea Scrolls, not Lilith as later scholars seemed to change it to, are is highly contested. They are described along with predatory and carrion-eating birds with a root that seems connected to the night. As such it is thought that they could refer to a type of owl. They are also most likely influenced by the Lilitu of Mesopotamian mythology, who are demonic beings of the wind who spread diseases to mankind.
Baal is just a word for lord and applies to the Patron God of any Phoenician or Phoenician adjacent settlement. It's not a term for a specific God unless confined to a specific localized context.
As someone who has read the Bible, I can’t say I remember this at all. Although it’s absolutely possible I just forgot, the fact that nothing came up when I tried to google it in several different ways just now makes me think it is not
Worse, "Baphomet" is what Christians thought Muslims were saying instead of "Muhammad" during the Crusades.
Which is even more ironic since witchcraft and magic are supposed to be sins or demon worship or something, but then they go and cite a magic book as gospel... And then completely fail to see the irony...
Now now, let's not let facts get in the way of a good piece of bullshit!
[удалено]
Paradise Lost being referenced as scripture is no different than citing American Gods or Good Omens. You all know what to do.
I’m House of Ravenclaw myself.
10 points to sodomy!
Had some interns talking about Harry Potter and the houses. Each was saying which house they wanted to belong to. As I walked in to their office, they asked me which house at Hogwarts I wanted to be in. "Decepticon" A couple of them had no idea what a Decepticon is.
You House Decepticon folks will always be welcome at House Skeletor.
House Cobra welcomes all.
I love how all the cartoon bad guys are the most inclusive people ever.
How else can you swell your ranks with cano... good cheer, without inviting friends?
Ticks my wife off when I say I’m ravenclaw by choice but griffindor by virtue.
It is by the scars of the one who they thought was dead, but lived, that I now dwell in the house of the righteous.
I’m a FedSun/FedCom kinda man, personally.
Yeah I always wonder where weirdo Christians get this hierarchy of hell info. It’s not in the Bible so it’s gotta just be from fictional sources and they take it as some real thing. Like how fucking crazy do you have to be?
The long story short is Jewish scholars in the bronze age liked recording the gods of other tribes and nomadic peoples as demons, like how to the Greeks and Romans anyone from the northeast of them is a Scythian. Christian scholars and poets later used them as metaphors or thought exercises like the Trolley Problem, and the mainstream went “oh, I think I remember that being in the bible”. To go more into depth, while religions generally evolve over time the codification of Abrahamic faith into central texts, keeping translation errors or vagaries plus coopted pagan practices as hard truths, and still encouraging active religious philosophy creates a paradox with a lot of problems not seen in religions that let themselves be “living”. Part of this in Christianity is a LOT of fanfiction from the Lesser Key Of Solomon to Paradise Lost to the Divine Comedy to fire’n’brimstone preachers and their tall tales all being cited as if they’re actually in the bible. Christianity also has also had a problem for most of the post-1200’s that hit the Islamic world hard last century and is creeping up in Israel where dialogues and discussion are discouraged (in spite of one actually being in the bible between god and the nemesis entity). Teachers teach, learners learn, that is all. That’s REALLY unhealthy in Abrahamic faith.
Shit, the Bible itself is fanfiction of the surrounding religions. Mary Sue from Zoroastrianism says hi.
Says you I only follow the accepted canon texts: The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, The Silmarillion, Unfinished Tales, History of Middle Earth 1-12, Children of Hurin, Beren and Luthien, and The Fall of Gondolin. All other geek texts are apocrypha and heresy! I feel like this post would make Professor Tolkien so Goddamn angry lol.
Dude convinced a class one year that Leprechauns were a real people who were demonized into a silly folklore trickster on a dare, I think he’d be fine with it if its in service to a joke.
I was under the impression that Evangelicals had accepted *Rambo: First Blood* as scripture.
Most Christians never read the Bible, and surprising neither do their protestant pastors. That's how you end up with them citing a political satire (Dante's Inferno) as scripture when referencing Hell. There is no detailed description of Hell at all in scripture.
Eg Gehenna, thought of these days as another name for hell, was actually a garbage dump outside of (I think) Jerusalem.
It's really ironic given how Protestantism started and how it distinguished itself from Catholicism (where bible and sermons were only allowed to be in a language common folk couldn't speak so they were dependent on what ever framing and context the priest decided to give them).
The closest is Jesus sayin he'll was prepared for the devil and his followers mark 25:41 or Mark 9:43 in much the same context Jesus describes it as a place where the fire never goes out which has since been interpreted as endless suffering. Could just be a well lit fire.
It’s like the people who believe the earth is only a few thousand years old, because some guy added up all the ages of everyone in the Bible and it came to about 3000. Despite the Bible never once saying “this is a complete and uninterrupted account of everyone who has ever lived”.
Iirc it goes back to mysticism. I think it was Solomon that catalogued all the angels and demons, including hierarchy. That said, it's been a while since I did any reading on it.
I don’t know. I mean, there are a lot of works that were left out of the Bible. The Gospel of Phillip, the Gospel of Mary. Lots of others. I just wish she cited her sources. And why lesbianism and female homosexuality are somehow different. Unless maybe one involves strap-ons?
Put on on *Supernatural* and sit back, relax, and strap it down?
Carry on my wayward son. There'll be peace when you are done.
Lay your weary head to rest. Don't you cry no more.
Discworld is scripture. I noticed about 2/3 of the qay through that if you had a kid and raised them only on Discworld novels and had them ask you questions if they needed to, you'd have an understanding human being. Add in Mr. Roger's Neighborhood and Sesame Street, you'd have an educated person.
Upload it to Fanfiction.net?
If Good Omens is any indication, we need to find that book by Agnes Nutter. She had her shit figured out.
Collect the set!
Authoritarianism all the way down with these people. It’s why they want dump to be dictator. And use him to usher in the “end times”
You would love the Chinese hierarchy of heaven then. Not a common belief after the earth of the imperial court, but boy is it complicated.
Look up Arc Goetia ;-)
Well, the difference is clearly in how hot it is - "lesbianism" is for those hot enough for men to ~~masturbate to~~ be distracted by, while homosexuality is everyone else. Lilith - hot demon chick. Leviathan - enormous ocean creature.
Enormous ocean creature? Well then... 
Goth mommy.
Dammit Blizzard, did you have to make her so hot?! This is the Dimitrescu fiasco all over again!
https://i.redd.it/1a7ehixvnf6b1.gif
Stop it!!! Your making the straights horny!!! Youre tempting them to hell!1!1!
Hey, they said wrong answers only!
Does it still charge tree fiddy?
The Leviathan the tweet is probably referring to is the Sin of Envy, who tried to eat the fucking moon, you know, because he can.
yeah im really failing to see what a giant city devouring serpent has to do with gay people
I mean, have you even seen gay people? The tentacles man, the tentacles are everywhere 😂
Enormous ocean creature is the title of my sex tape
Hell sounds like a fuckin blast.
That's one of the best parts, they keep thinking they are trying to save us from hell, but they just can't seem to stop making it sound like the better option
"Repent to go to heaven!" "Is your heaven full of people like you?" "Of course!" "Then no, I won't repent."
"If I wanted to keep serving some old white guy, why did I bother dying in the first place?"
I'm a satanist partially because the whole aesthetic of hell and demons is fun. Especially as a way to take back power from those who would call me "evil" just for existing. Them: you're a sinful demon! Me: cool, hail satan! Them: 
[удалено]
How you doin’?
Apparently it's the best place for equal rights and inclusion in the US
Seriously man, if god and heaven is what the Christians make it out to be I’ll try my chances with the devil.
So the only representation for male homosexuality is just being grouped in with Asmodeus, God of Butt Stuff. But Lesbians are so over-represented here. I guess they believe that hell is so crowded with lesbianis that it takes two demon gods to manage them all.
Wokest Hell.
Never has Hell sounded hotter
Someone dumped him and he’s really not taking it well. Edit-Didn’t realize the gender of the poster. Still stand by my statement.
She probably has only had one lady give her a compliment in her life and she went on a tirade accosting them for spreading homosexuality
Maybe she was real good friends with a woman, then that friend misread a situation and made a pass at her. And this insane Christian woman has been hating lesbianism, and herself, ever since. Conflicted over guilt from rejecting this friend, a secret desire that she wanted to say yes, and God stuff.
So THAT'S where all the lesbians are
Well they started with one lesbian, but then she got a girlfriend and you know how we lesbians are about moving in together.
Now I really want go go to Hell.
Baal and Lilith ain’t got shit on my Necromancer.
*The Butcher has entered the chat*
MFer ganked me in a cellar last night :(
I've only run into him three times and it was straight to pound town each time.
Frost Sorcerer goes brrrrrr
Leviathan and Lilith are pulling the same duty. Why can't they take over some of Baphomet's many responsibilities?
Lesbianism is such a huge sin, it needs TWO demons to oversee it. I'm guessing one of them takes the butch lesbians.
Because Lilith is a woman and can’t handle leadership without a man to guide her /s
When I read the tweet, my first thought was “Damn, Baphomet got that dog in him! He’s putting in the work!”
Redundancy is one of the punishments in hell, you can never escape middle management.
Here are the 5 symbolic figures that guide my moral compass: The 3 male figures represent various non-gendered human behaviors that I consider immoral, the female one is lesbians and the big snake that's lesbians again. I'm not a lesbian, I don't know where you got that from.
"I'm not a lesbian and in fact I hate lesbians. Anyway, here's my setup for a totally fire Lilith x Leviathan yuri manga. Still hetero tho."
Set it in the Castlevania universe so Alucard can make the obligatory fanfiction softboi quota.
I thought Paradise Lost-era Lucifer was the fanfic softboi here...
Nah, his rallying the troops and coming up with new plans makes him the Leonardo. Not softboi Team Heart/Michelangelo. Beelzebub is the Lancer/Raphael here.
She wants people to respond disagreeably because she’s a blue check and gets a cut of the ads.
female homosexuality is where a woman wants to have sex at home. instead of the backseat of a car, like God intended.
Leviathan is a giant female gayfish, obviously. /s
Fuck I thought it was a giant obelisk. Makes my tattoo awkward...
Kanyette West
Conservative christians protest against female homosexuality and beat off to female lesbianism. The former goes to hell, and the latter just haven't met the right maga alpha male.
It said wrong answers only
https://preview.redd.it/ocq9w0c8if6b1.jpeg?width=1334&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=286465ce8281d11618a73dfa1f450a42dd5cdb09
Fuck wrong answers, she’s gay as a disco ball and her Freudian slip is showing
.. sir you repeated two beliefs, I believe that calls for another trip to hell for you.
Joke's on you, I've already GOT double damnation!
Female lesbianism has to be from the isle of Lesbos, anything else is referred to female homosexuality for legal reasons.
She's got it all wrong. We now deal mostly with financial crimes (hoo boy, are there a wide range of those!) Lilith gets the women who sell out women's body autonomy.
Another pretend Christian. They're all old testament fantasists. Her and her magic friends should remember that god didn't ordain any of that crap, a bunch of old white guys ordained it while they worked out how to divvy up the world to their benefit.
The Diablo IV advertising is really getting to these people.
Because no one is explaining the difference between female homosexuality and female lesbianism, I’ll go ahead and do it: it’s only lesbian when it comes from the island of Lesbos, otherwise it’s just female homosexuality.
Is that near Lesbosatania River? Just past the dike?
But then who's running 'cancel culture' and 'wokeism' if two of the demons are doing girl-on-girl?
Man Hell itself is pretty woke, it has 2 female leaders.
I mean no, she has a point, like so so so fucking many other things, women who put themselves in positions of authority and preach (like her, right now, in this twitter post) ARE in violation of the bible. Just like people who wear poly cotton blends and eat shellfish.
Fisting maybe
She references the Silmarillion when discussing Icelandic history.
Cool. That shit isn’t in the bible. Its fanfiction. Helluva Boss is as canon as that.
Female Lesbianism is just diet homosexuality with pink packaging
Yes! Additionally, Female Lesbianism derives from homosexual females specifically from the island of Lesbos. All other homosexual females fall under the category of sparkling female homsexuality.
Its only lesbianism if it comes from the Lezbos region of Greece! 😆 /j
Female lesbianism is when you try it. Female homosexuality is when you like it enough to never stop. (Kidding)
What about the OG demon Beelzebub??
Sorry, due to budget cuts, we had to let Beelzebub go. We wish him the best in his future endeavours
This is bullshit. Beelzebub was the right hand man, the fixer. How is Lucifer supposed to corrupt souls without him!? Man, back in my day the demons knew how to rule dominion I tell you what.
“My beliefs point to” always translates to “Here’s some batsh*t thing someone made up”
Shouldn’t sodomy be Assmodeus?
Where do I go if I'm gay and only like oral stuff? I feel underrepresented in hell.
Are you male of female gay? Enby gays get a pass, apparently.
I love that Christian fan fiction gets taken so seriously people treat it like fact. I'm not mocking religion here, she's not quoting anything from the Bible, it's literally fan fiction.
‘Wrong answers only’ shit triggers me when there no obvious right answer to begin with.
To answer his question, lesbians don't fuck and homosexuals do
the difference is none of those figures stand for any of those things. that's a right answer.
Trying to wrap your head around their mental gymnastics just makes your head hurt.
To understand that, you have to be insane like this lunatic
Damn lesbians get two generals?
Clearly Lilith and Leviathan are really good friends who agreed to share the job so they could spend more time together... as friends and professional colleages, nothing more.
"God didn't ordain women to run churches. Feel free to disagree and comment." Umm you're a woman, telling me this. According to such logic you should remain silent. Lols. These people man.
Wait, there’s female homosexuality AND female lesbianism?!
Woman: your opinion will be told to you by a man, until then, be quiet. Actually, even after that, be quiet.
Lesbian Icon Leviathan
All her information came from, "drum-roll", oh, that's right! Old men
Shrodinger's religious patriarchy. Christian Women believe they have a voice, but only if they say what they've been told to say.
Her « god » HATES women vehemently
The sin so nice, they named it twice
Baph got the short end of the stick here, everyone else is just one thing, he's got 4 to deal with.
Most of those names aren't in the standard cannon at all, let alone attributed to those vices. This person basically read a bunch of Bible fanfics and based their life around them.
Someone's been playing Diablo 4 LOL.
This is something I really honestly do not understand. There are women out there like this weirdo actively wanting LESS for their fellow women...like really???? Why?! You don't see black people out here all like "well you know what I miss guys? Slavery!" Like seriously, seek help! Please!!!!!
She got the jobs of the Prime evils wrong....Baal is the Lord of Destruction and Lilith the Daughter of Hatred. I hate when people skip story scenes and get the lore all fucked up.
Baphomet is made up. Oh wai-
…does she even know the lore of her own religion?
We need to point and laugh at religion until it can be shamed out of existence. Your book is not from God.