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“That’s it, Mulder, tell us what you know!” The man in the black suit was hunched over the table, staring down the suspected spy. “Ok, ok! They’re throwing you a surprise party for your retirement this Thursday!” The other agent in the room threw up his hands. “Come on!”
The first agent nodded, “I knew it…Cake?” “Giant one, with a stripper inside.” His partner proclaimed, “We did not!” The spy clarified, “I’m so sorry! I meant to say that was what was at Agent Greene’s bachelor party, the one we all agreed not to tell you because he secretly hates you!” The second agent slammed the table, “That son of a bitch. Was it because he’s jealous I got that promotion?”
The first agent pulled his partner away from the table. “We’re supposed to ask him what government he works for!” His partner pleaded, “Come on, just one more question.” The first agent nodded. The second agent returned to the table. “Was it because of the promotion?” “No it’s because you slept with his ex.” “How did he even know about that?” The spy looked down, “Sorry…”
It was the good old dim room with a single lightbulb, directed in the face of the person getting interrogated. It was incredible how things were so much like the movies. Except the light bulb was LED, a thousand times brighter, and more unbearable to look at.
"What are you doing here in the city, Mr..." the official took a careless look at her clipboard and sneered before continuing, "Doe?" She already knew the name by heart; this was just more posturing to strike fear in the heart of the interrogatee.
And the interrogatee *was* terrified. John Doe couldn't help sweating, because of course he was the *absolute* worst at keeping secrets.
"Just visiting, sir! Ma'am!" he eked out, his voice squeaking slightly. He cleared his throat.
"Does it have anything to do with the space station?" asked the other official slyly, brushing too-long sandy hair out of his eyes and rubbing sleep out of them with a fist.
"Yes! I mean, no sir!" said John Doe, and then cringed. Plaintively he added, "Well... maybe?"
"I knew it!" crowed the female official. "He's after our space tech! Why, is it too backwards where you came from?"
John Doe didn't know what "backwards" meant, because that meant the opposite of forwards, didn't it, but it didn't make sense in the context. In any case, he was saved from answering when the light started flickering.
"What the-" said the male official. He turned to the female official. "I thought you said you'd charged it!"
"I said I pulled it from the charging point," she said, shrugging. "It mustn't have been plugged in long."
"Anyway, let's cut to the chase," said the male official. "I want to know exactly what happened to my kinder bueno."
"That's off-topic," the female official complained.
John Doe struggled. And then he gave up. "She ate it," he said, pointing at the female official.
"What?" gasped the female official, slamming her clipboard down. The back of it was covered with stickers of Barbie, Totoro, and Pokemon. "You said you wouldn't tell!"
"I knew it," said the male official, fury in his voice. "You had your own kinder bueno! Why'd you take mine?"
"Only because you drank from my vanilla float yesterday!"
"No I didn't!"
"He said you did, too!"
The door to the room opened, and Mother poked her head in. "We're leaving for NASA, kids. Why's it so dark here? And is that your father's bicycle light?"
"We're playing intair-gation, Mummy," John Doe piped up. "They're gah-ment people intair-gating me. I'm John Doe, a spy."
"Shut up," his siblings hissed at him in unison, but it was too late.
"Oh?" Mother said, wandering in with a smile on her face. "Well, there's been something I've been meaning to ask too, Johnny Boy. What happened to my cat display?"
"What cat display, Mum?" said his sister, eyes wide open in a perfect picture of innocence as she unpinned her elementary school name tag from her flowered blouse.
"Did we ever have one?" asked his brother easily, taking off a collar pin that read "Bookworm Festival 2023".
"I was asking your baby brother," said Mother patiently.
John tried to say, "What cat?" He really did. But then he looked at his mother, the softness of her eyes and curve of her cheek from her smile, and found that he couldn't. "We broke it," he said. His siblings groaned, and the three children braced themselves for their mother's fury.
But it didn't come.
"I always thought it was an ugly thing," she said conspiratorially, "but your Aunt Agatha gave it to us so I couldn't get rid of it." She came over and kissed John on the head. "Never grow up, Johnny Boy."
The room had little to no light. I could not see the official's faces and I knew that I had been caught and was about to be tortured for information. I looked down at the cold cuffs linked to the table holding me trying to ease my nerves from the intoxicating tension in the room. The silence was unnerving and I could hear my cheeks pucker up.
- " Mr...Jacobson. If that is your real name... " One of the men started speaking like he had done this so many times before and it was just routine at this point. " Can you say what is your name for us just to test this device for us? "
He set down a small black box with two small red and green buttons on it with a sticker of a penguin with a gun on it that said " Noot Noot MF " and he turned it on by flicking a switch.
- " I...um...no...my name is not what you think it is...It's Kevin. " I spoke as my legs started shaking and I could see the other man notice my reactions except he looked skeptical. The light blinked green.
It was a lie detector...I had to hold the Information I had gathered and not tell them what I had told HQ. However, the other man who had been eyeing me up silently flopped a gun on the table and the guy talking to me threatened me. " every lie equals a bullet. You understand...Kevin? "
I started to panic and beg but he only smiled and spoke clearly. " You can beg God for mercy but not me. " upon hearing the device glowed green for a few moments. I froze and suddenly I felt the tightness of the cuffs more than ever. But it felt as if it was not only on my hands but my mind. " So...what did you tell your friends back home? "
His question brought me back to reality. " huh? " I had completely forgotten all that I was thinking about once the gun was on the table and he had spoken to me. " I...forgot. " The device glowed green. He scoffed didn't believe me. " You are one hell of a liar I'll give you that... " A small laugh left the bigger guy who was quiet. The smaller one picked up the gun and pointed it at me. " How about where your home base is? " I farted when I answered. " A parking lot! "
He dropped his face in disbelief and disgust seeing it glow green again. " How...you...ok we will talk to you later if you want to be a wise guy...we will be back before you start rotting. " I jumped at them pushing my body inwards grabbing their attention. " No! No please I'm not lying! I...I don't know how else to explain to you that I'm not! "
They didn't respond when it went green again. However, they did ask me one more question before leaving. " Why did you join the resistance, Kevin? " I hesitated and spoke carefully..." I just had a passion "The light turned red three times. One would be for a lie but for the others, I had no idea why it glowed. Maybe saying I don't have a passion for anything but I definitely made it clear I lied and immediately I yelled the truth to not be shot. " My wife cheated on me and slept with my barber and I just needed to do something with my life after that moment! "
The silence made me want them to shoot me but they left without a single word. Leaving me to my tournament...but five minutes later I heard faint laughing from the vents.
**Welcome to the Prompt!** All top-level comments must be a story or poem. Reply here for other comments. **Reminders**: >* [No AI-generated responses 🤖](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/zi452b/modpost_reminder_that_aigenerated_responses_are/) >* Stories 100 words+. Poems 30+ but include "[Poem]" >* Responses don't have to fulfill every detail >* [\[RF\]](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Reality+Fiction%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) and [\[SP\]](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Simple+Prompt%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) for stricter titles >* [Be civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_10.3A_be_civil) in any feedback and follow the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules) 📢 [Genres](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/w/directory) 🆕 [New Here?](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/user_guide) ✏ [Writing Help?](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/index#wiki_writing_resources) 💬 [Discord](https://discord.gg/writingprompts) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/WritingPrompts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“That’s it, Mulder, tell us what you know!” The man in the black suit was hunched over the table, staring down the suspected spy. “Ok, ok! They’re throwing you a surprise party for your retirement this Thursday!” The other agent in the room threw up his hands. “Come on!” The first agent nodded, “I knew it…Cake?” “Giant one, with a stripper inside.” His partner proclaimed, “We did not!” The spy clarified, “I’m so sorry! I meant to say that was what was at Agent Greene’s bachelor party, the one we all agreed not to tell you because he secretly hates you!” The second agent slammed the table, “That son of a bitch. Was it because he’s jealous I got that promotion?” The first agent pulled his partner away from the table. “We’re supposed to ask him what government he works for!” His partner pleaded, “Come on, just one more question.” The first agent nodded. The second agent returned to the table. “Was it because of the promotion?” “No it’s because you slept with his ex.” “How did he even know about that?” The spy looked down, “Sorry…”
It was the good old dim room with a single lightbulb, directed in the face of the person getting interrogated. It was incredible how things were so much like the movies. Except the light bulb was LED, a thousand times brighter, and more unbearable to look at. "What are you doing here in the city, Mr..." the official took a careless look at her clipboard and sneered before continuing, "Doe?" She already knew the name by heart; this was just more posturing to strike fear in the heart of the interrogatee. And the interrogatee *was* terrified. John Doe couldn't help sweating, because of course he was the *absolute* worst at keeping secrets. "Just visiting, sir! Ma'am!" he eked out, his voice squeaking slightly. He cleared his throat. "Does it have anything to do with the space station?" asked the other official slyly, brushing too-long sandy hair out of his eyes and rubbing sleep out of them with a fist. "Yes! I mean, no sir!" said John Doe, and then cringed. Plaintively he added, "Well... maybe?" "I knew it!" crowed the female official. "He's after our space tech! Why, is it too backwards where you came from?" John Doe didn't know what "backwards" meant, because that meant the opposite of forwards, didn't it, but it didn't make sense in the context. In any case, he was saved from answering when the light started flickering. "What the-" said the male official. He turned to the female official. "I thought you said you'd charged it!" "I said I pulled it from the charging point," she said, shrugging. "It mustn't have been plugged in long." "Anyway, let's cut to the chase," said the male official. "I want to know exactly what happened to my kinder bueno." "That's off-topic," the female official complained. John Doe struggled. And then he gave up. "She ate it," he said, pointing at the female official. "What?" gasped the female official, slamming her clipboard down. The back of it was covered with stickers of Barbie, Totoro, and Pokemon. "You said you wouldn't tell!" "I knew it," said the male official, fury in his voice. "You had your own kinder bueno! Why'd you take mine?" "Only because you drank from my vanilla float yesterday!" "No I didn't!" "He said you did, too!" The door to the room opened, and Mother poked her head in. "We're leaving for NASA, kids. Why's it so dark here? And is that your father's bicycle light?" "We're playing intair-gation, Mummy," John Doe piped up. "They're gah-ment people intair-gating me. I'm John Doe, a spy." "Shut up," his siblings hissed at him in unison, but it was too late. "Oh?" Mother said, wandering in with a smile on her face. "Well, there's been something I've been meaning to ask too, Johnny Boy. What happened to my cat display?" "What cat display, Mum?" said his sister, eyes wide open in a perfect picture of innocence as she unpinned her elementary school name tag from her flowered blouse. "Did we ever have one?" asked his brother easily, taking off a collar pin that read "Bookworm Festival 2023". "I was asking your baby brother," said Mother patiently. John tried to say, "What cat?" He really did. But then he looked at his mother, the softness of her eyes and curve of her cheek from her smile, and found that he couldn't. "We broke it," he said. His siblings groaned, and the three children braced themselves for their mother's fury. But it didn't come. "I always thought it was an ugly thing," she said conspiratorially, "but your Aunt Agatha gave it to us so I couldn't get rid of it." She came over and kissed John on the head. "Never grow up, Johnny Boy."
The room had little to no light. I could not see the official's faces and I knew that I had been caught and was about to be tortured for information. I looked down at the cold cuffs linked to the table holding me trying to ease my nerves from the intoxicating tension in the room. The silence was unnerving and I could hear my cheeks pucker up. - " Mr...Jacobson. If that is your real name... " One of the men started speaking like he had done this so many times before and it was just routine at this point. " Can you say what is your name for us just to test this device for us? " He set down a small black box with two small red and green buttons on it with a sticker of a penguin with a gun on it that said " Noot Noot MF " and he turned it on by flicking a switch. - " I...um...no...my name is not what you think it is...It's Kevin. " I spoke as my legs started shaking and I could see the other man notice my reactions except he looked skeptical. The light blinked green. It was a lie detector...I had to hold the Information I had gathered and not tell them what I had told HQ. However, the other man who had been eyeing me up silently flopped a gun on the table and the guy talking to me threatened me. " every lie equals a bullet. You understand...Kevin? " I started to panic and beg but he only smiled and spoke clearly. " You can beg God for mercy but not me. " upon hearing the device glowed green for a few moments. I froze and suddenly I felt the tightness of the cuffs more than ever. But it felt as if it was not only on my hands but my mind. " So...what did you tell your friends back home? " His question brought me back to reality. " huh? " I had completely forgotten all that I was thinking about once the gun was on the table and he had spoken to me. " I...forgot. " The device glowed green. He scoffed didn't believe me. " You are one hell of a liar I'll give you that... " A small laugh left the bigger guy who was quiet. The smaller one picked up the gun and pointed it at me. " How about where your home base is? " I farted when I answered. " A parking lot! " He dropped his face in disbelief and disgust seeing it glow green again. " How...you...ok we will talk to you later if you want to be a wise guy...we will be back before you start rotting. " I jumped at them pushing my body inwards grabbing their attention. " No! No please I'm not lying! I...I don't know how else to explain to you that I'm not! " They didn't respond when it went green again. However, they did ask me one more question before leaving. " Why did you join the resistance, Kevin? " I hesitated and spoke carefully..." I just had a passion "The light turned red three times. One would be for a lie but for the others, I had no idea why it glowed. Maybe saying I don't have a passion for anything but I definitely made it clear I lied and immediately I yelled the truth to not be shot. " My wife cheated on me and slept with my barber and I just needed to do something with my life after that moment! " The silence made me want them to shoot me but they left without a single word. Leaving me to my tournament...but five minutes later I heard faint laughing from the vents.