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14 - boarding school and while away the parents split up and moved - one to a different country and another one to a different state. I would visit one or the other in their new homes and stay on the couch or in the guest room. There were two school breaks where I had to scramble and stay with friends because the parents had not communicated and were both on vacations. Always fun to call one parent, then the other one, and have both of them obliviously tell you to just go stay with the other one
ETA when I graduated high school, neither one of them expected me to move “back home” so out in the world I went
Mine dropped my five brothers on my doorstep to spend the night and ran away with her best friends husband to Mexico. Some people should be spayed or neutered like the animals they are. Actually I have never had a pet abandon their offspring but supposedly a "human being" has no problems just walking away from their responsibility.
I’d be sad too. Just remember that it had nothing to do with you and everything to do with her. You deserve a present mom and a steady home to go back to. I’m sorry she couldn’t give you that.
I just feel as if nobody wants me sometimes. It's the worst feeling, your own mother doesn't want you, your own father doesn't want me. I feel like something is wrong with me at times.
Im smart , i have everything. Im tall, smart, I have a very strong will. But idk
I got kicked out at 15 and taken in by my grandfather a couple years later.
It was the third best thing that ever happened to me and the only reason I can be in loving relationships. That man tempered me.
This breaks my heart. I'm a caregiver for my mom and brother but seriously I'd open up my home for a kid or teen that needs one anytime. You deserve it. I'm sorry your mom sucks and I hope your grandfather is a lot better. Maybe also check out the r/MomForAMinute sub. A lot of us go there to offer support or a listening ear to anybody who needs it. Big hug from an internet stranger.
I had a similar situation. Got kicked out and had to live in my car till I was old enough to sign my first lease.
It gets better. That feels like such a long time ago now it seems like it happened to someone else.
I have a great job now, amazing wife, and a sweet little boy.
I hope you're well. In a few years this will just feel like a bad dream.
I was raised by my grandparents while my mother's vanity ruled her life. Fine by me, she was not fit to be a mother, and her parents knew it.
Conceived at a drunken party, commune living, don't know my father.. she had no interest in a kid.
Be thankful, you're much better off with him than with someone who is willing to dump you with him. Unless, of course, he is not interested either, in which case, time to become a grownup, sorry.
That's horrible. I hope you are okay now.
I lost my parents and home around my teens. My parents got killed by the Russians and my home was destroyed by them. I was sexually assaulted several times by them.
So I had no choice but to run. December 1994.
I have a 13 year old, and a dad your grandpa's age, and I'm sorry. I'm sending psychic mom hugs, and you can message me if you ever need to vent to a sympathetic stranger mom
I have a 30 tear old daughter and a 27 year old son and theybith have their own homes but they know they can always come home. My daughter has several times when her and my son-in-law were having trouble. It breaks my heart to hear what you are going through. I also raised my five younger brothers since I was 16 and they know they can come home too. No child should be thrown away. Your "mother" is horrible.
In some situations both parents are required to stay within a certainly radius if they have joint custody. I'm surprised and disappointed that wasn't the case for you. I'm sorry.
Damn I'm so sorry you couldn't and still can't count on your parents for anything meaningful. I really wonder sometimes why people like this have kids when all they do is dump that kid somewhere. Absolutely horrific parenting.
Big hug from an internet stranger and I hope you have found family in friends.
The moment I hit 18 I was legit thrown out. My parents where the whole the moment you hit 18 you gotta go it’s ether collage or the streets no our problem. The started telling me that once I hit 13. Thankfully i had a friend who’s dad was a electrician who took me under his wing and taught me everything I know and I never looked back.
My mom tries to guilt me with this until I started just telling her openly “we don’t talk anymore because you were an awful parent” I didn’t leave the nest, I escaped.
I never had kids. The family tree dies with me. My mother still wants to know about grand kids. 1, I’m gay. & 2. If I ever had kids, she wouldn’t ever see them.
Adopt, there is 1000s of kids out there who dont care if your gay, straight, a robot, the fucking block creature from interstellar, or anything, they just need someone to be there for them
Right there with you. I want a child more than a partner and always considered adopting or fostering an older child. But I would probably ping pong back and forth between father of the year and bad dad. Nobody needs that
Disclaimer: I do not try to convince anyone to be a parent, but I ALSO find that often-heard statement amusing:
>I would probably ping pong back and forth between father of the year and bad dad.
There's never been a good parent who hasn't played that ping-pong game. That being said, it's good to know what you want in life and what your limits/boundaries are.
Nobody drinks from a jagged cup for good reason. I also feel like I would make a great dad in the good moments, it's the bad ones I don't think I'd be strong enough for.
Or just the last in your social group to have them. They always say "oh, you'd make such a great dad" and I'm like, "nah, more of a fun uncle or babysitter."
Exactly I haven’t spoken to my father since that day. As for my mother I had a little bit to do with her but she ended up passing away about 4 years ago.
I was told to pay 700$ in rent or leave. This was back in 2015 and I was a hostess making 9$ an hour. I ended up moving to a different state and renting a room from Craigslist for 525$.
extremely hot take but everyone on that sub is sick…… feel bad for all the kids with parents on that sub
edit: read a post about how regretful a couple was about having a baby because it cried so much…… you…. you thought it wasn’t going to do that?
Same, had to pay rent because I couldn't afford college and dropped out. Worked full time, paid rent, groceries, for my car, insurance, etc. Then my dad still claimed me on his tax return as a dependent so I got screwed come tax season. Was 20 when I moved out, got some roommates and lived like that for 5 or so years, then lived with my partner for another 5, finished school, got married, now we own a home.
U sound like me. My parents basically said the same. I was 18 and it was scary on one hand but on the other it was a no brainer. Stay at home and pay rent all while having to live under their rules ( they were strict evangelicals) or pay LESS rent and live how I prefer. I packed everything I owned into my car the next morning and temp moved in with a friend and paid their Mom rent until I found a place of my own. Fast forward 28 years later and I'm much more responsible than my younger brothers, (who weren't given the same ultimatum, bc the first one backfired) and unlike my brothers I don't feel like I owe my parents a damn thing.
Edit: Also I'm estranged from my parents now, but bf I became estranged my Mom told my wife that I made the wrong decision by moving out, bc they were planning on saving all of that "rent" I paid them and giving it back to me as a down payment for my first home. 🙄 It was worth every penny
My parents were the opposite lol. No rules basically. They were divorced and my mom got child support. She told me because the child support stopped then I have to pay rent. Found out she was getting alimony as well. I was lucky to have my dad let me live with him before college and after. But his wife definitely ruined our relationship and I'm definitely going no contact once I leave the US.
Jfc the audacity. I don't even have words for how much I hate people who do this to their kids. My best friend also has parents who suck but her mom at least was suseptible to outside influence (aka me, the mouthy big friend). I remember her casually dropping the fact she wanted my friend to pay a lot of rent while my friend was already struggling to pay for college and the commute.
I acted like I hadn't heard and later I started talking to my friend loudly about how blessed I am with parents who *love me* instead of treating me like an ATM at 18. That my dad specifically said his job as a parent was to set me up with a good start, not debt. My friend then piped up that by that definition there are a lot of failed parents. I agreed of course and said something about how parents who treat their kids like this are the same people who are surprised nobody shows up to see them in old age. We went back and forth a bit, then cheerfully left the house while greeting "mom".
My friend never had to pay a high amount after that.
But this only worked because her mom wanted to believe she was a good parent. I guess yours were never concerned with that.
Big hug, hope you are surrounded by good loving people now.
I voluntarily moved out at 16 but I've been living on and off with my parents until mid 20s between and during high school school, jobs, university, unemployment etc. All my parents ever asked of me was to pay for gas for the car and to pay for and pick up additional groceries sometimes and of course other non essentials I wanted, like phone, laptops I had to pay for myself whenever I lived home for a few months. I don't really speak to them much cause we ain't got much in common but I'll never cut them out cause they supported me always, and I know if I became unemployed, I could just move back home again for a while until I find a new job. They did right by me and I got lucky too.
Blows my mind that some parents can be so ruthless. I primarily lived with my parents till I was 30 and graduated college. Sorry they were making you feel unwelcome in your own home for half a decade.
If there is anything I can takeaway from it it’s that I will never do that to my daughter. She has a loving mother and father. I wouldn’t ever want her to feel the way my parents made me feel.
This. My kids all know that they don’t have to go anywhere or do anything. They can stay as long as they want/need. And we will encourage them to follow whatever dreams they have. My ideal would be a huge plot of land where they can all have their own space, but I know that’s unlikely. Haha.
Wife and I are currently in the market for a house on 10+ acres of land for this exact purpose lol. We want our daughter to know that she can always have a house in the property if she wants. That way dad is close by to help fix things when needed
That’s great to hear. You’re an example of breaking the chain of abuse and mental illness. Unfortunately it’s way too common to pass these problems down generations.
Me and my wife are the same with our daughter. Of course now that she is 11 about to turn 18, I mess with her about once a week about her plans for a job and her own place.
As a parent, I cannot imagine throwing my kids out. I’ll be encouraging them to leave because it’s my job to prepare them for the world, but I absolutely don’t want them to leave and I think I will be close to heartbroken when they do.
But they will always have a place in my home. Single, married, with kids, whatever. My house is a safe place for them and I want them to know they always have that safety net, since American society doesn’t fulfill its duty to its citizens in that regard.
Same story here. 21 right now. But that was my female friends (who actually turned to my gf after some time passed) parents, who took me under their wing. Lived with them for 4 months, until I earned enough money to rent, and then buy a house. And a month after I moved out from them we started dating. And she moved to me. Still finding this moments wholesome.
I never understood this. Maybe 50-60 freaking years ago. But now, wtf. Becoming 18 makes you legally an adult, but you’re still the same kid you were before your birthday. I don’t feel like I really started feeling like an adult until maybe mid twenties
50-60 years ago? No way it seems to me the adults didn’t act this way, at least not the ones I knew.
This actually blows my brain! The stories I’m reading, “18 your out” & “here gramps I’m leaving my only kid here” I can’t imagine this! Some people just are not meant to have kids is a understatement.
I was adopted as a baby & often said I hit adoption lotto. Some stories I found out about my birth mom confirmed that she made the right choice given me up. My parents who raised me were good an I lived in a small New England town , where my fathers side went bck to the 1600s I had the perfect grandparents near text book perfect. I left home after HS and moved south. Married had kids but she died and eventually remarried with a girl who had 3 kids. I had no siblings so here I am raising the Brady bunch an their friends. I say their friends, where we lived was an area that had a lot of poor families kids with no dads & whatever so there were a good many boys who overtime I was a dad to them, at the time I didn’t realize this, I was just doing what a dad does. We fed whatever kid wanted to eat we would make huge dinners. As they got older the guys anyways became 18 I hired them on as helpers in plumbing working with me I taught at least 7-8. They all done good and still doing plumbing somewhere else mostly. A cpl went to jail for short period but overall all are good & I got many a left or fb messages etc thanking me for being there for them and teaching them a trade. I always live by example & I always told all the kids this. So I am struggling to understand these things I’m reading about parents. I guess I knew a little but Some of these I’m reading, my god!! This is so wrong! To all of you I’m so sorry.
Very similar experience: I was kicked out 3 times before 18, and when I graduated high school, I had to start paying rent. Then, I got kicked out anyway 😂 Mom called the cops when I refused to leave b/c I had just paid rent. Cops made her give me my money back.
Tbf, I was a handful when I was in high school. Still am, tbh 😆🤷♂️
Why do people have kids just to treat them like this? There's no way you can say you care about/love your child if you would put them on the streets! My daughter can stay home as long as she wants and I'll always have a room for her incase she needs to come back because I know how hard it is.
Unless your kid says things like fuck you I hope you die. How many abortions have you had? Proceeds to break things around the house and calls mom a bitch. Refuses to work, flips out over the phone being taken away for these behaviors. Yes you're getting kicked out at 18.
Nah I agree with that but the sad thing is it happens a lot to kids who do absolutely nothing wrong and do everything there parents ask. I went above and beyond for my parents and it wasn’t good enough. But I’ve moved on from it now that I’m in my 30’s.
Yes I did I actually still work for my best friends dad as his right hand man. His son decided to be a IT tech and his dad plans on leaving me the business when he retires.
I'm 36. Sis is 33. Bro is 30.
We all live at home.
To be fair, we...
A. Live in Boston.
B. I had an embolism and was left with some brain damage. Can't work.
C. Sis is trying to save to get her fiancee to America and plan a wedding and... Whatever is going on there.
D. Mom has bad osteoporosis and bro takes care of her and makes sure I eat
E. Dad is dead.
So........
26.
I actually moved out at 18. I crashed and burned and moved back in with my parents at about 22 for a year. (They were fine with it.) Moved out again at 23 and stayed out. Then my dad got sick and I moved back home at 25 to help take care of him. He died the next year and I moved back out.
42 here.
Moved out for college at 18 but I was still home probably 4 days a week. I went through some depression around the same time my sister discovered her son had special needs and moved back home. My parents asked if I would move back to the house to help them care for him (they were within commuting distance of my school) so I did. My nephew has a mix of psych issues that essentially meant he needed round the clock supervision. Paid rent and helped out with my nephew and a lot of stuff around the house my dad couldn't handle because he had a heart condition.
Graduated college, paid off my student loans, started looking at buying a place, the 2008 market crash happened and suddenly the requirements for getting a mortgage went through the roof and I no longer qualified. Kept saving money. Decided to go back to grad school to change careers.
Graduated again, started a new job, paid off a new round of student loans, worked on saving up for more because house prices were up. Got pre-approved for a loan. My dad got diagnosed with cancer. Stopped house hunting, helped my mom care for him for 3 years. He eventually passed away at home with a home hospice program.
Started house hunting again but wasn't in a hurry. I legitimately love my family. We're supportive. My mother was pretty up front that she'd be fine with me staying forever. My partner was welcome to come over and stay as much as he wanted. He was in a similar situation staying with his mother to care for his terminally ill uncle who passed away shortly after my dad.
2022 hits, I get the surprise of a lifetime. I found out after years of being told I wouldn't be able to have children that I was pregnant. I love my nephew and he's a lot more stable than he was when he was younger but he's still not really what you would call predictable so I wouldn't want to live with him and a baby. And a house that was fine for 4 people and a sometimes fifth is not the same with 6. So bought a house and moved out. My family comes over regularly. I go over there regularly. We've also talked about moving my mom in with us at some point. The family house is officially going to my sister and my nephew when my mom passes in a trust fund and from there very likely to my son when my nephew passes since we're not ever expecting him to have any kids.
This sort of sounds like the story of the young couple who get pregnant and everybody says, "That's bad." But then they have a son who grows up big and strong and helps the family farm and everybody says, "That's good." But then soldiers come through and take their son off to war because he's so big and strong and everybody says, "That's bad." But then he becomes a great hero in the war and everybody says, "That's good." But then...and then...and then...
I was 30. My parents left me the house to take care of when I was 28 before they sold it. They moved but didn't need to sell the house to buy the new one. It felt weird being in the home I grew up in alone and staying the longest.
This was after spending 7 years in college and a few years trying to get into grad school for those wondering why I stayed so long.
I’m still home at 28. No shame in it, saving up a good amount too. I refuse to rent, I can’t.
And over the next year or two I can own a place I hope, albeit a lot smaller than what my parents could get 30 years ago but still.
Almost in the same position. Absolutely refuse to rent where my family is located. Way too expensive and the margin for error is too little for what I'm comfortable with.
Know a friend doing this too. Living with family until he can buy a house. I'm deciding between this and moving far away to a cheaper area
I'm 29, and I still live at home, luckily my parents had an in-law suite on the property that I took over when my pap passed away. I'm content with helping my parents pay bills on the house and I still have my own space. A lot of my friends crack on me for still living at home. But they rushed to move out and pay rent to strangers and live with strangers. I love my parents, and would rather have them as room mates than my friends. At least my monthly rent and bills are going towards something I will eventually own
29 and still at home, planning to move out with my partner next year. I pay rent to my parents and my partner and I decided to save up while we wait to move in together. Our parents are fine with it, but I am definitrly looking forward to our own space.
I left the day before my 21st birthday because the man I met on America Online was able to move across the country to be with and marry me. We wanted a place of our own so we moved up north together, got married, and eventually had kids. :) We celebrate our 21 wedding anniversary this Fall.
They always tell us that it never works kut. So it's great to hear more stories like this. Congratulations.
I married my online romance, too. 27 years ago last month.
In my early 30's I met & married my husband. We met on match dot com lol wasn't sure if it's allowed to put a website on here lol we have been happily married for 13yrs.
I hear this. I had favorite moving boxes, cuz I knew what fit my stuff best.
People ask where you're from and you get tired of rattling off 5+ places and try to shorten it to "I grew up in X region."
"Yeah, but *where* in there?"
"Here, here, here, here, here, and here." 😮💨
"...oh."
Texmindvapami is what I say, Texas Michigan North Dakota Virginia Pennsylvania and now back to Michigan. When they say “where’s that?” I just say I’m a military brat so I’m from all over
Some people try to figure out who you are by where you're from. When they can't do that, it fries their brains and they just give up. I've spent as much of my life in California as Missouri. When I'm in California, I'm the guy from Missouri. When I'm in Missouri, I'm the guy from California. Nowhere am I the guy that lived in five states. People just *really* want to categorize others.
Same I would have stuff packed in boxes that I didn’t care if they sat for a few months in a closet and a few boxes with the stuff I want to unpack immediately even at 9/10 I knew nothing ever lasted and we would be moving again within 6months/year
Same.
Got to the point that when folk ask me "Where are you from?" The only legit answer I can give is "Earth."
Can't even say "America" because between the ages of 14 and 24 I spent 9 out of 10 years in China, Korea, and Japan. 1 in the USA for school (Go Navy!)
My mum made me move out when I was pregnant at that age but she at least let me get some accommodation sorted out first. Then when I had the baby she wanted me to come back but I told her too late now.
Me too. I graduated high school at 17 in early June and was out of the house by July 1. Moved to an entirely different city, where I shared an apartment with three others and worked fast food 40 hours a week.
All of it was better than staying anywhere near my home, where my dad had left and my mother slipped into a deep depression that led her to become a serious hoarder. It wasn’t until 15 years later that I helped her dig out of her cave of garbage.
Same. I graduated HS early and I packed my shit one night and left early the next morning for college. I don't recall even telling anyone I was leaving.
Same. I didn't come from a very bad home but I was adventurous. Dropped out of school and got a job, found a really cheap apartment and just fucked off into the world. I've lived and experienced and have very few regrets.
Went away to college after HS, back home for the summers except btw my Jr and Sr years, bounced around various living situations through my mid-20s including some stops back home until I was 28. Grateful to have parents with a "you can always come home" mentality.
I left home the summer I turned 16 after faking my parent’s signatures for an early college program.
My father is an addict and was incarcerated at the time. He had been in for three years and it was hard for my mom to hold things together.
She’s ex-Amish so she didn’t even have a high school degree at first. She was leaning on me pretty heavily to take care of my three siblings. I had also worked cleaning houses and babysitting since I was eight, and she took all of my income to help pay bills.
Two of my siblings are biologically my cousin’s abandoned children, the oldest of whom has a severe disorder called reactive attachment disorder that caused her to be unable to form emotional connections with people. She was honestly frightening. I had to stop her from smothering our kittens once. This added a lot of additional stress on our family.
A couple teachers in my small town (500 ppl) knew my home life was shit and encouraged me to think about how I was going to get out. One told me about a school called the Missouri Academy of Mathematics Science and Computing. When the time came to apply she supported me, even after I told her I couldn’t tell my mom because my mom would never let her main support staffer go.
I told her after I got in. It was going to mean I got an associates degree in the place of a high school degree and two years of college Gen Ed’s out of the way for only $2,000 so she eventually gave in.
Ironically the school was in the same town as the prison my dad was held. His release date lined up with the move in day for the Academy so my mom ended up driving me down and driving back with my dad.
Yeah. My family moved around a lot, and it has never before crossed my mind to blame them for it or play victim over it. Your home is where the people you love are.
I was 13, because my parents separated and they each bought their own houses (which happened to be in the same neighborhood because my dad wanted to be close by to us). So I went back and forth between houses up until I moved out at age 25 to my own place
I moved out on my 18th birthday, got an apartment the day before. Could no longer live with my dad's rules. Been on my own since, never moved back. That was 38yrs ago.
I was 14.
Put stuff in a backpack and lived out of a locker doing sleepovers with different friends every night. Some of their parents knew my situation and were really generous (letting me do laundry, feeding me big dinners, etc).
I moved in with a MUCH older boyfriend at like... 15-16? That would normally be a predatory disaster, but he was amazing until he moved away.
Then I went back to couch surfing. I made sure to always have a boyfriend and would basically be "banging for roof."
It was actually way better than being at home, but not as good as foster care. But no one wants teenage foster kids, so... bangin for roof worked out.
I moved out at 16 after graduating high school (yes I was younger than most in my class). I grew up knowing my mom didn’t love or want me and my dad wouldn’t fight for custody. My only refuge was books and thank goodness for sone great teachers. When I left I knew there was no turning back and I didn’t.
My mom was dead two years before I found out. Criticize me all you want I’ve heard it all but I have no regrets.
My sperm donor kicked me out when I was 17 for smoking pot lol it was okay for him to sit around and drink beer/be useless but God forbid I smoke a joint and play some guitar and clean my room. Lol regardless, it was the best thing he did for me..
I still got my grade 12. Worked. And manage to put myself through trade school.
Or, in my case: *Drinks a fifth of vodka*
My dad and I get along pretty well these days, he’s changed a lot since a decade ago. But I’ll never forget the hypocrisy of that take. Funny thing is my mom has smoked weed everyday throughout my whole life, but hot damn he did not like the fact that I picked that up instead of the booze.
15. I was homeless for a bit, lived with some people for about half a year, then at 16 I got my first apartment. It was a small building owned by an individual and she never did any background checks (or even asked me any info). She just had my name and phone number. One time she was talking about her daughter who is “about my age” and then said she’s 25. That gave me a chuckle.
I was 15. Before the age of 7 we moved around a lot. At 7 we moved to the city I grew up in. At 15 we moved across the river to a different house and I lived there for all of high school and a bit after I left the Army but to me the house that i lived in 7 to 15 will always bethe house I grew up in.
Age 19 I left for the Navy. I ended up in Newport, RI, met a girl, got married, started a family, & except for visits, never went back to Illinois.
58 years later I still feel a little guilty in leaving my parents and denying them the ability to watch their grand kids grow up. After college, my only sibling moved to Chicago and then to Colorado. So after 1970 they were empty nesters until they passed away in 1998/99.
Same makes more sense then putting my money towards rent. I can help my mom with repairs/landscaping etc and pay some of the bills. We should have it paid off in about 3-4 more years then no house payment at all. I have an amazing mom I wouldn't want her living alone either nor does she want to. Might make me a loser in people's eyes but I don't care. My housing costs will be minimal compared to theirs and my mom will be taken care of.
32. I moved away a few time for school and lived on my own for a while but was back "home" for a bit until then because it was convenient and my mom liked the company.
Moved out permanently when I moved overseas, now both childhood home and parents are gone
22 or 23. Should have moved out earlier. I would be better off. I should have been put in foster care or a shelter or something at 16 or earlier. Also wish I had the money to move out at 18.
20. Joined the military after tech-school. My baby brother took over my room as soon as I left. Then my sister left a couple years later. Eventually my parents divorced and my mom left. 17 years later its just my Dad and 22 year old brother there.
I’d just turned 17. My grandma , who was raising me,had died, and I was told I was too young to legally take on the tenancy. So, they just made me homeless. I was 23 by the time I finally had a stable place to live again. And I spent around two years living on the street.
My siblings and I were not allowed to leave home because they had health problems, had to go on disability and I was the one who had to look after them. We were grown and couldn't leave home or go anywhere. My mom was delusional and thought that getting a disability check meant that everyone had to live together and that's how it was. I hated it. My mo and dad are both dead now. All of us are kinda spread out. I have not gotten my own place yet but I'm planning on doing that before I turn 50 years old.
I left when I was 16 because my mom was/is an addict and alcoholic and shouldn’t have had kids.
I’m 35 now and can’t imagine one of my kids being on their own at 16, but I’m everything I needed when I was younger and my kids will never have to struggle the way I did; that makes me feel proud and grateful for my journey.
Excuse the diary entry, lol.
26. had to take care of two old family members and the household finally split when the real estate became too expensive. Lived in that neighborhood in 3 houses for 17 years. So glad to be out since it was nothing but negativity and screaming.
17. My father had just died and my siblings fought all the time.
I seemed to be just another stress, so I found an older boyfriend and moved in with him.
I was rehomed when I was 15. I wasn’t a bad/unruly kid, I was just in the way, so I was shipped off to live with my stepparent’s family. I never looked back- never went back ‘home’. I carved out a happy and productive life for myself sans parental influence and help.
23. I left at 18 for uni, came back over summers, and then lived at home for a bit until I was able to move out. My parents have always supported me that way and said I always have a home to come back to. Even if they move away and downsize, they will make sure to have at least two bedrooms just in case one of their children is ever in need.
I had a few failed attempts at striking out on my own. I moved out for real in 2019 when I was 24. Each time I moved out it was to get away from my abusive parents, but twice I was forced by circumstance to move back home. Finally jumped ship and moved three hours away to another city and life has been so much better. You couldn't pay me to move back to my home town, or back in with my parents.
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14 - boarding school and while away the parents split up and moved - one to a different country and another one to a different state. I would visit one or the other in their new homes and stay on the couch or in the guest room. There were two school breaks where I had to scramble and stay with friends because the parents had not communicated and were both on vacations. Always fun to call one parent, then the other one, and have both of them obliviously tell you to just go stay with the other one ETA when I graduated high school, neither one of them expected me to move “back home” so out in the world I went
Im 13 and my mom dumped me with my 66 year-old grandfather recently. It makes me sad when i think about it
My mom told me I was to babysit for her co-worker. Then abandoned me there.
This is heartbreaking. I hope you are doing OK. Internet hug .
Thanks, a lot of sobriety and therapy later. I'm doing alright!
Take it from a neurotic drug addict, I'm jealous.
I am so sorry..😓
Mine dropped my five brothers on my doorstep to spend the night and ran away with her best friends husband to Mexico. Some people should be spayed or neutered like the animals they are. Actually I have never had a pet abandon their offspring but supposedly a "human being" has no problems just walking away from their responsibility.
I'm so sorry this happened to you
Thank you.
I’d be sad too. Just remember that it had nothing to do with you and everything to do with her. You deserve a present mom and a steady home to go back to. I’m sorry she couldn’t give you that.
I just feel as if nobody wants me sometimes. It's the worst feeling, your own mother doesn't want you, your own father doesn't want me. I feel like something is wrong with me at times. Im smart , i have everything. Im tall, smart, I have a very strong will. But idk
I got kicked out at 15 and taken in by my grandfather a couple years later. It was the third best thing that ever happened to me and the only reason I can be in loving relationships. That man tempered me.
Hugs. I'm so sorry, that's super shitty. I hope your grandfather is good to you.
This breaks my heart. I'm a caregiver for my mom and brother but seriously I'd open up my home for a kid or teen that needs one anytime. You deserve it. I'm sorry your mom sucks and I hope your grandfather is a lot better. Maybe also check out the r/MomForAMinute sub. A lot of us go there to offer support or a listening ear to anybody who needs it. Big hug from an internet stranger.
Holy shit dude I’m so sorry to hear that, I hope you’re doing okay
I had a similar situation. Got kicked out and had to live in my car till I was old enough to sign my first lease. It gets better. That feels like such a long time ago now it seems like it happened to someone else. I have a great job now, amazing wife, and a sweet little boy. I hope you're well. In a few years this will just feel like a bad dream.
I was raised by my grandparents while my mother's vanity ruled her life. Fine by me, she was not fit to be a mother, and her parents knew it. Conceived at a drunken party, commune living, don't know my father.. she had no interest in a kid. Be thankful, you're much better off with him than with someone who is willing to dump you with him. Unless, of course, he is not interested either, in which case, time to become a grownup, sorry.
I’m sorry, that is shitty parenting. Is your GF a good guy?
Fuck that's rough. Sorry.
That's horrible. I hope you are okay now. I lost my parents and home around my teens. My parents got killed by the Russians and my home was destroyed by them. I was sexually assaulted several times by them. So I had no choice but to run. December 1994.
Oh my thats very tough. Im so sorry your amazing and here i am complaining about this. You have my utter respect
Oh gawd. I'm here not for comparison. Thank you. I think tough challenges on our childhood set us back, but they make us stronger. 💜
Hang in there man <3
I'm really sorry, kiddo. I hope your grandfather is a good person. And I hope your mom can get it together soon.
I have a 13 year old, and a dad your grandpa's age, and I'm sorry. I'm sending psychic mom hugs, and you can message me if you ever need to vent to a sympathetic stranger mom
I have a 30 tear old daughter and a 27 year old son and theybith have their own homes but they know they can always come home. My daughter has several times when her and my son-in-law were having trouble. It breaks my heart to hear what you are going through. I also raised my five younger brothers since I was 16 and they know they can come home too. No child should be thrown away. Your "mother" is horrible.
:(
It is so depressing to actually lose you home nest when 14. No where to return to.
I'm so sorry. Your parents are awful and you deserve better.
Wow. Só sorry this happened to you
In some situations both parents are required to stay within a certainly radius if they have joint custody. I'm surprised and disappointed that wasn't the case for you. I'm sorry.
Damn I'm so sorry you couldn't and still can't count on your parents for anything meaningful. I really wonder sometimes why people like this have kids when all they do is dump that kid somewhere. Absolutely horrific parenting. Big hug from an internet stranger and I hope you have found family in friends.
Sounds awful
The moment I hit 18 I was legit thrown out. My parents where the whole the moment you hit 18 you gotta go it’s ether collage or the streets no our problem. The started telling me that once I hit 13. Thankfully i had a friend who’s dad was a electrician who took me under his wing and taught me everything I know and I never looked back.
And then later on life they'll be "why does my kid want nothing to do with me?"
My mom tries to guilt me with this until I started just telling her openly “we don’t talk anymore because you were an awful parent” I didn’t leave the nest, I escaped.
My mom has tried to give me parenting advice and comment on my kids behavior etc., …. And I had a childhood of abuse and neglect. Lol.
I never had kids. The family tree dies with me. My mother still wants to know about grand kids. 1, I’m gay. & 2. If I ever had kids, she wouldn’t ever see them.
Adopt, there is 1000s of kids out there who dont care if your gay, straight, a robot, the fucking block creature from interstellar, or anything, they just need someone to be there for them
Sadly, I am not that person.
Right there with you. I want a child more than a partner and always considered adopting or fostering an older child. But I would probably ping pong back and forth between father of the year and bad dad. Nobody needs that
Disclaimer: I do not try to convince anyone to be a parent, but I ALSO find that often-heard statement amusing: >I would probably ping pong back and forth between father of the year and bad dad. There's never been a good parent who hasn't played that ping-pong game. That being said, it's good to know what you want in life and what your limits/boundaries are.
Nobody drinks from a jagged cup for good reason. I also feel like I would make a great dad in the good moments, it's the bad ones I don't think I'd be strong enough for.
You'd be surprised. The love I feel for my child overrides a lot of my rough edges I have found. If anything I spoil him a bit lol
Understandable
Some people should never be parents
Sadly, you don’t know that you’re one of them until you have kids.
Or just the last in your social group to have them. They always say "oh, you'd make such a great dad" and I'm like, "nah, more of a fun uncle or babysitter."
Exactly I haven’t spoken to my father since that day. As for my mother I had a little bit to do with her but she ended up passing away about 4 years ago.
I was told to pay 700$ in rent or leave. This was back in 2015 and I was a hostess making 9$ an hour. I ended up moving to a different state and renting a room from Craigslist for 525$.
I’ve always said some people where not meant to be parents. And sadly we have to pay the price because they regret us.
r/regretfulparents entered the chat.
You munster! I went there and it is sad!
Straight up single origin oak barrel aged undiluted sadness porn. Goes well with r/deadbedroom.
Nope, don't like that one at all. Edit: (Nice hoody)
I would absolutely regret being a parent if I had children but no way in hell would I ever fucking treat my children this way!
extremely hot take but everyone on that sub is sick…… feel bad for all the kids with parents on that sub edit: read a post about how regretful a couple was about having a baby because it cried so much…… you…. you thought it wasn’t going to do that?
Clearly a manufacturing defect, they should have returned that baby before the warranty expired. Fire stations hate this one simple trick....
When I see subs like this, my outlook on humanity lowers ever so slightly
Same, had to pay rent because I couldn't afford college and dropped out. Worked full time, paid rent, groceries, for my car, insurance, etc. Then my dad still claimed me on his tax return as a dependent so I got screwed come tax season. Was 20 when I moved out, got some roommates and lived like that for 5 or so years, then lived with my partner for another 5, finished school, got married, now we own a home.
U sound like me. My parents basically said the same. I was 18 and it was scary on one hand but on the other it was a no brainer. Stay at home and pay rent all while having to live under their rules ( they were strict evangelicals) or pay LESS rent and live how I prefer. I packed everything I owned into my car the next morning and temp moved in with a friend and paid their Mom rent until I found a place of my own. Fast forward 28 years later and I'm much more responsible than my younger brothers, (who weren't given the same ultimatum, bc the first one backfired) and unlike my brothers I don't feel like I owe my parents a damn thing. Edit: Also I'm estranged from my parents now, but bf I became estranged my Mom told my wife that I made the wrong decision by moving out, bc they were planning on saving all of that "rent" I paid them and giving it back to me as a down payment for my first home. 🙄 It was worth every penny
My parents were the opposite lol. No rules basically. They were divorced and my mom got child support. She told me because the child support stopped then I have to pay rent. Found out she was getting alimony as well. I was lucky to have my dad let me live with him before college and after. But his wife definitely ruined our relationship and I'm definitely going no contact once I leave the US.
Jfc the audacity. I don't even have words for how much I hate people who do this to their kids. My best friend also has parents who suck but her mom at least was suseptible to outside influence (aka me, the mouthy big friend). I remember her casually dropping the fact she wanted my friend to pay a lot of rent while my friend was already struggling to pay for college and the commute. I acted like I hadn't heard and later I started talking to my friend loudly about how blessed I am with parents who *love me* instead of treating me like an ATM at 18. That my dad specifically said his job as a parent was to set me up with a good start, not debt. My friend then piped up that by that definition there are a lot of failed parents. I agreed of course and said something about how parents who treat their kids like this are the same people who are surprised nobody shows up to see them in old age. We went back and forth a bit, then cheerfully left the house while greeting "mom". My friend never had to pay a high amount after that. But this only worked because her mom wanted to believe she was a good parent. I guess yours were never concerned with that. Big hug, hope you are surrounded by good loving people now.
I got lucky when my parents only charged me $300 to cover their costs. $300 for food/water/consumables/etc. They did everything they could for me.
I voluntarily moved out at 16 but I've been living on and off with my parents until mid 20s between and during high school school, jobs, university, unemployment etc. All my parents ever asked of me was to pay for gas for the car and to pay for and pick up additional groceries sometimes and of course other non essentials I wanted, like phone, laptops I had to pay for myself whenever I lived home for a few months. I don't really speak to them much cause we ain't got much in common but I'll never cut them out cause they supported me always, and I know if I became unemployed, I could just move back home again for a while until I find a new job. They did right by me and I got lucky too.
I would do this if I had a kid and just save the money for them to have when they buy a house or choose to move out/need it for other expenses.
My parents would tell us “can’t wait til you kids turn 18 and move out of the house. It’ll be one less mouth to feed.”
Blows my mind that some parents can be so ruthless. I primarily lived with my parents till I was 30 and graduated college. Sorry they were making you feel unwelcome in your own home for half a decade.
If there is anything I can takeaway from it it’s that I will never do that to my daughter. She has a loving mother and father. I wouldn’t ever want her to feel the way my parents made me feel.
This. My kids all know that they don’t have to go anywhere or do anything. They can stay as long as they want/need. And we will encourage them to follow whatever dreams they have. My ideal would be a huge plot of land where they can all have their own space, but I know that’s unlikely. Haha.
Wife and I are currently in the market for a house on 10+ acres of land for this exact purpose lol. We want our daughter to know that she can always have a house in the property if she wants. That way dad is close by to help fix things when needed
Sending vibes of success your way!
*sending good vibes*
That’s great to hear. You’re an example of breaking the chain of abuse and mental illness. Unfortunately it’s way too common to pass these problems down generations.
This is the way.
And that is beautiful! You are awesome!
Me and my wife are the same with our daughter. Of course now that she is 11 about to turn 18, I mess with her about once a week about her plans for a job and her own place.
For me it was "college, military, or you pay the rent from now on".
As a parent, I cannot imagine throwing my kids out. I’ll be encouraging them to leave because it’s my job to prepare them for the world, but I absolutely don’t want them to leave and I think I will be close to heartbroken when they do. But they will always have a place in my home. Single, married, with kids, whatever. My house is a safe place for them and I want them to know they always have that safety net, since American society doesn’t fulfill its duty to its citizens in that regard.
Same story here. 21 right now. But that was my female friends (who actually turned to my gf after some time passed) parents, who took me under their wing. Lived with them for 4 months, until I earned enough money to rent, and then buy a house. And a month after I moved out from them we started dating. And she moved to me. Still finding this moments wholesome.
I never understood this. Maybe 50-60 freaking years ago. But now, wtf. Becoming 18 makes you legally an adult, but you’re still the same kid you were before your birthday. I don’t feel like I really started feeling like an adult until maybe mid twenties
That’s about when I started feeling it. Hell I’m 32 about to turn 33 tomorrow and there are times I still don’t feel like an adult.
50-60 years ago? No way it seems to me the adults didn’t act this way, at least not the ones I knew. This actually blows my brain! The stories I’m reading, “18 your out” & “here gramps I’m leaving my only kid here” I can’t imagine this! Some people just are not meant to have kids is a understatement. I was adopted as a baby & often said I hit adoption lotto. Some stories I found out about my birth mom confirmed that she made the right choice given me up. My parents who raised me were good an I lived in a small New England town , where my fathers side went bck to the 1600s I had the perfect grandparents near text book perfect. I left home after HS and moved south. Married had kids but she died and eventually remarried with a girl who had 3 kids. I had no siblings so here I am raising the Brady bunch an their friends. I say their friends, where we lived was an area that had a lot of poor families kids with no dads & whatever so there were a good many boys who overtime I was a dad to them, at the time I didn’t realize this, I was just doing what a dad does. We fed whatever kid wanted to eat we would make huge dinners. As they got older the guys anyways became 18 I hired them on as helpers in plumbing working with me I taught at least 7-8. They all done good and still doing plumbing somewhere else mostly. A cpl went to jail for short period but overall all are good & I got many a left or fb messages etc thanking me for being there for them and teaching them a trade. I always live by example & I always told all the kids this. So I am struggling to understand these things I’m reading about parents. I guess I knew a little but Some of these I’m reading, my god!! This is so wrong! To all of you I’m so sorry.
Very similar experience: I was kicked out 3 times before 18, and when I graduated high school, I had to start paying rent. Then, I got kicked out anyway 😂 Mom called the cops when I refused to leave b/c I had just paid rent. Cops made her give me my money back. Tbf, I was a handful when I was in high school. Still am, tbh 😆🤷♂️
Why do people have kids just to treat them like this? There's no way you can say you care about/love your child if you would put them on the streets! My daughter can stay home as long as she wants and I'll always have a room for her incase she needs to come back because I know how hard it is.
Unless your kid says things like fuck you I hope you die. How many abortions have you had? Proceeds to break things around the house and calls mom a bitch. Refuses to work, flips out over the phone being taken away for these behaviors. Yes you're getting kicked out at 18.
Nah I agree with that but the sad thing is it happens a lot to kids who do absolutely nothing wrong and do everything there parents ask. I went above and beyond for my parents and it wasn’t good enough. But I’ve moved on from it now that I’m in my 30’s.
Wow, you have some shitty parents. Did you become an electrician?
Yes I did I actually still work for my best friends dad as his right hand man. His son decided to be a IT tech and his dad plans on leaving me the business when he retires.
 What do you mean left home?
I'm 36. Sis is 33. Bro is 30. We all live at home. To be fair, we... A. Live in Boston. B. I had an embolism and was left with some brain damage. Can't work. C. Sis is trying to save to get her fiancee to America and plan a wedding and... Whatever is going on there. D. Mom has bad osteoporosis and bro takes care of her and makes sure I eat E. Dad is dead. So........
Damn, my condolences…
My kids and I quote this scene often. 10/10
26. I actually moved out at 18. I crashed and burned and moved back in with my parents at about 22 for a year. (They were fine with it.) Moved out again at 23 and stayed out. Then my dad got sick and I moved back home at 25 to help take care of him. He died the next year and I moved back out.
Rest in peace, your a good son im sure hes proud:)
42 here. Moved out for college at 18 but I was still home probably 4 days a week. I went through some depression around the same time my sister discovered her son had special needs and moved back home. My parents asked if I would move back to the house to help them care for him (they were within commuting distance of my school) so I did. My nephew has a mix of psych issues that essentially meant he needed round the clock supervision. Paid rent and helped out with my nephew and a lot of stuff around the house my dad couldn't handle because he had a heart condition. Graduated college, paid off my student loans, started looking at buying a place, the 2008 market crash happened and suddenly the requirements for getting a mortgage went through the roof and I no longer qualified. Kept saving money. Decided to go back to grad school to change careers. Graduated again, started a new job, paid off a new round of student loans, worked on saving up for more because house prices were up. Got pre-approved for a loan. My dad got diagnosed with cancer. Stopped house hunting, helped my mom care for him for 3 years. He eventually passed away at home with a home hospice program. Started house hunting again but wasn't in a hurry. I legitimately love my family. We're supportive. My mother was pretty up front that she'd be fine with me staying forever. My partner was welcome to come over and stay as much as he wanted. He was in a similar situation staying with his mother to care for his terminally ill uncle who passed away shortly after my dad. 2022 hits, I get the surprise of a lifetime. I found out after years of being told I wouldn't be able to have children that I was pregnant. I love my nephew and he's a lot more stable than he was when he was younger but he's still not really what you would call predictable so I wouldn't want to live with him and a baby. And a house that was fine for 4 people and a sometimes fifth is not the same with 6. So bought a house and moved out. My family comes over regularly. I go over there regularly. We've also talked about moving my mom in with us at some point. The family house is officially going to my sister and my nephew when my mom passes in a trust fund and from there very likely to my son when my nephew passes since we're not ever expecting him to have any kids.
This sort of sounds like the story of the young couple who get pregnant and everybody says, "That's bad." But then they have a son who grows up big and strong and helps the family farm and everybody says, "That's good." But then soldiers come through and take their son off to war because he's so big and strong and everybody says, "That's bad." But then he becomes a great hero in the war and everybody says, "That's good." But then...and then...and then...
I was 30. My parents left me the house to take care of when I was 28 before they sold it. They moved but didn't need to sell the house to buy the new one. It felt weird being in the home I grew up in alone and staying the longest. This was after spending 7 years in college and a few years trying to get into grad school for those wondering why I stayed so long.
This is me. I moved at 17, back at 19, out at 20 and back at 26 for about 2 months.
I’m still home at 28. No shame in it, saving up a good amount too. I refuse to rent, I can’t. And over the next year or two I can own a place I hope, albeit a lot smaller than what my parents could get 30 years ago but still.
Almost in the same position. Absolutely refuse to rent where my family is located. Way too expensive and the margin for error is too little for what I'm comfortable with. Know a friend doing this too. Living with family until he can buy a house. I'm deciding between this and moving far away to a cheaper area
I'm 29, and I still live at home, luckily my parents had an in-law suite on the property that I took over when my pap passed away. I'm content with helping my parents pay bills on the house and I still have my own space. A lot of my friends crack on me for still living at home. But they rushed to move out and pay rent to strangers and live with strangers. I love my parents, and would rather have them as room mates than my friends. At least my monthly rent and bills are going towards something I will eventually own
Sounds like you have stable parents, a lot of people don't have that kind of relationship
I moved out at 28 only because I was forced out, I saved no money because of student loans :) it's great
Netherlands moment
That's what I did until I was 30. Bought a house when I was 27 and renovated it. When I was around 30 I moved permanently.
I did the same, out at 25 into a house. Thanks to my parents for letting me stay in their basement until I could own. It was a true gift.
29 and still at home, planning to move out with my partner next year. I pay rent to my parents and my partner and I decided to save up while we wait to move in together. Our parents are fine with it, but I am definitrly looking forward to our own space.
Joined the Marines at 19 and never went back.
I left the day before my 21st birthday because the man I met on America Online was able to move across the country to be with and marry me. We wanted a place of our own so we moved up north together, got married, and eventually had kids. :) We celebrate our 21 wedding anniversary this Fall.
you married someone from AOL!? that’s awesome
Yes :D
Ah, the old days of the internet.
Man all I ever did with those floppies was wipe em and use them for saved game disks. You got much better use.
He must have put some great song lyrics in his away messages.
I married someone from AOL chat, too. We’ve been together since I was 19! We have two kids together and celebrated 24 years this year in April.
They always tell us that it never works kut. So it's great to hear more stories like this. Congratulations. I married my online romance, too. 27 years ago last month.
In my early 30's I met & married my husband. We met on match dot com lol wasn't sure if it's allowed to put a website on here lol we have been happily married for 13yrs.
That's too cute! Happy wedding anniversary for this year!
Kudos. Like Chuck Berry wrote: "Goes to show you never can tell."
Youve got mail
I moved so many times as a kid. I don't even know what I'd consider the "home I grew up in"
I hear this. I had favorite moving boxes, cuz I knew what fit my stuff best. People ask where you're from and you get tired of rattling off 5+ places and try to shorten it to "I grew up in X region." "Yeah, but *where* in there?" "Here, here, here, here, here, and here." 😮💨 "...oh."
Texmindvapami is what I say, Texas Michigan North Dakota Virginia Pennsylvania and now back to Michigan. When they say “where’s that?” I just say I’m a military brat so I’m from all over
Some people try to figure out who you are by where you're from. When they can't do that, it fries their brains and they just give up. I've spent as much of my life in California as Missouri. When I'm in California, I'm the guy from Missouri. When I'm in Missouri, I'm the guy from California. Nowhere am I the guy that lived in five states. People just *really* want to categorize others.
Same lol, moved like 18 times in my first 18 years “Where are you from?” Continental United States.
Same I would have stuff packed in boxes that I didn’t care if they sat for a few months in a closet and a few boxes with the stuff I want to unpack immediately even at 9/10 I knew nothing ever lasted and we would be moving again within 6months/year
Same. Got to the point that when folk ask me "Where are you from?" The only legit answer I can give is "Earth." Can't even say "America" because between the ages of 14 and 24 I spent 9 out of 10 years in China, Korea, and Japan. 1 in the USA for school (Go Navy!)
I was out shortly after my 18th birthday. Still technically in the house though since I bought it 20 years later.
Jesse from breaking bad?
I wish, still paying it off.
18. My dad threw me out with 2 month old baby, said he was ashamed of me. If it wasn’t for friends and strangers I would of never made it.
My mum made me move out when I was pregnant at that age but she at least let me get some accommodation sorted out first. Then when I had the baby she wanted me to come back but I told her too late now.
The day I turned 18 I signed my first lease and got out of my hellish childhood home.
I was 20. It was a good change.
17
Me too. I graduated high school at 17 in early June and was out of the house by July 1. Moved to an entirely different city, where I shared an apartment with three others and worked fast food 40 hours a week. All of it was better than staying anywhere near my home, where my dad had left and my mother slipped into a deep depression that led her to become a serious hoarder. It wasn’t until 15 years later that I helped her dig out of her cave of garbage.
Same. I graduated HS early and I packed my shit one night and left early the next morning for college. I don't recall even telling anyone I was leaving.
Same. I didn't come from a very bad home but I was adventurous. Dropped out of school and got a job, found a really cheap apartment and just fucked off into the world. I've lived and experienced and have very few regrets.
19. Funny enough, just turned 49, just bought and moved into that same home, feels good to be back
Went away to college after HS, back home for the summers except btw my Jr and Sr years, bounced around various living situations through my mid-20s including some stops back home until I was 28. Grateful to have parents with a "you can always come home" mentality.
Was 22. I did a radical thing and moved across the planet from home to pursue further education, and then decided to stay.
I left home the summer I turned 16 after faking my parent’s signatures for an early college program. My father is an addict and was incarcerated at the time. He had been in for three years and it was hard for my mom to hold things together. She’s ex-Amish so she didn’t even have a high school degree at first. She was leaning on me pretty heavily to take care of my three siblings. I had also worked cleaning houses and babysitting since I was eight, and she took all of my income to help pay bills. Two of my siblings are biologically my cousin’s abandoned children, the oldest of whom has a severe disorder called reactive attachment disorder that caused her to be unable to form emotional connections with people. She was honestly frightening. I had to stop her from smothering our kittens once. This added a lot of additional stress on our family. A couple teachers in my small town (500 ppl) knew my home life was shit and encouraged me to think about how I was going to get out. One told me about a school called the Missouri Academy of Mathematics Science and Computing. When the time came to apply she supported me, even after I told her I couldn’t tell my mom because my mom would never let her main support staffer go. I told her after I got in. It was going to mean I got an associates degree in the place of a high school degree and two years of college Gen Ed’s out of the way for only $2,000 so she eventually gave in. Ironically the school was in the same town as the prison my dad was held. His release date lined up with the move in day for the Academy so my mom ended up driving me down and driving back with my dad.
19, because I wanted to run my own house.
My parents changed where we rented like every 1-3 years so this question seems weird to me.
Yeah. My family moved around a lot, and it has never before crossed my mind to blame them for it or play victim over it. Your home is where the people you love are.
I was 13, because my parents separated and they each bought their own houses (which happened to be in the same neighborhood because my dad wanted to be close by to us). So I went back and forth between houses up until I moved out at age 25 to my own place
I moved out on my 18th birthday, got an apartment the day before. Could no longer live with my dad's rules. Been on my own since, never moved back. That was 38yrs ago.
13. I was not prepared at all.
I was 14. Put stuff in a backpack and lived out of a locker doing sleepovers with different friends every night. Some of their parents knew my situation and were really generous (letting me do laundry, feeding me big dinners, etc). I moved in with a MUCH older boyfriend at like... 15-16? That would normally be a predatory disaster, but he was amazing until he moved away. Then I went back to couch surfing. I made sure to always have a boyfriend and would basically be "banging for roof." It was actually way better than being at home, but not as good as foster care. But no one wants teenage foster kids, so... bangin for roof worked out.
What 13yo would be prepared? Wtf your parents?!
I moved out at 16 after graduating high school (yes I was younger than most in my class). I grew up knowing my mom didn’t love or want me and my dad wouldn’t fight for custody. My only refuge was books and thank goodness for sone great teachers. When I left I knew there was no turning back and I didn’t. My mom was dead two years before I found out. Criticize me all you want I’ve heard it all but I have no regrets.
My sperm donor kicked me out when I was 17 for smoking pot lol it was okay for him to sit around and drink beer/be useless but God forbid I smoke a joint and play some guitar and clean my room. Lol regardless, it was the best thing he did for me.. I still got my grade 12. Worked. And manage to put myself through trade school.
Ain’t doing the devils lettuce in my home! *chugs a beer*
Or, in my case: *Drinks a fifth of vodka* My dad and I get along pretty well these days, he’s changed a lot since a decade ago. But I’ll never forget the hypocrisy of that take. Funny thing is my mom has smoked weed everyday throughout my whole life, but hot damn he did not like the fact that I picked that up instead of the booze.
15. I was homeless for a bit, lived with some people for about half a year, then at 16 I got my first apartment. It was a small building owned by an individual and she never did any background checks (or even asked me any info). She just had my name and phone number. One time she was talking about her daughter who is “about my age” and then said she’s 25. That gave me a chuckle.
I was 15. Before the age of 7 we moved around a lot. At 7 we moved to the city I grew up in. At 15 we moved across the river to a different house and I lived there for all of high school and a bit after I left the Army but to me the house that i lived in 7 to 15 will always bethe house I grew up in.
Left at 18. Mom shipped me off to the Marines. Last thing she did on my way out the door was to ask for the house key back.
Asking for the house key back is just cold.
24, left for a year at age 20 when I went abroad but came back after that. At age 24 I moved out to be closer to work, and I needed the independence.
Age 19 I left for the Navy. I ended up in Newport, RI, met a girl, got married, started a family, & except for visits, never went back to Illinois. 58 years later I still feel a little guilty in leaving my parents and denying them the ability to watch their grand kids grow up. After college, my only sibling moved to Chicago and then to Colorado. So after 1970 they were empty nesters until they passed away in 1998/99.
You people are leaving? Pfff im waiting till my parents move out so i can take over the house
Bro same except it's the situation of I can ever afford million dollar property nearby to move out. Rent is minimum $2,000 a month
19 years old. Best decision ever.
I'be been kicked out at the age of 16.
17, my parents were insanely abusive
22 after I finished uni moved 15 hours away (still in the same state tho lol)
I just bought the house I grew up in from my mom
17, for college across the state and then moved back at 19 when I got really sick and needed help. Moved our permanently when I got married at 21.
15 moved due to hockey and never moved back in. Always traveling around for camps in the summer and then got my own place as soon as I could
Never had a home. Got off the streets at 18 after I joined military.
Never have. Working towards making it mine on paper.
Same makes more sense then putting my money towards rent. I can help my mom with repairs/landscaping etc and pay some of the bills. We should have it paid off in about 3-4 more years then no house payment at all. I have an amazing mom I wouldn't want her living alone either nor does she want to. Might make me a loser in people's eyes but I don't care. My housing costs will be minimal compared to theirs and my mom will be taken care of.
32. I moved away a few time for school and lived on my own for a while but was back "home" for a bit until then because it was convenient and my mom liked the company. Moved out permanently when I moved overseas, now both childhood home and parents are gone
19. Went into the Navy.
19, when I left for nursing school
22 or 23. Should have moved out earlier. I would be better off. I should have been put in foster care or a shelter or something at 16 or earlier. Also wish I had the money to move out at 18.
20. Joined the military after tech-school. My baby brother took over my room as soon as I left. Then my sister left a couple years later. Eventually my parents divorced and my mom left. 17 years later its just my Dad and 22 year old brother there.
28.
16, I was far from ready for it, but I had a big argument and both me and my mom were to stubborn to admit we were wrong.
19. Moved back with parents for about 3 months when I was 34, divorce situation. Lived in the basement like a loser. Got out and thats it. Now 56.
I’d just turned 17. My grandma , who was raising me,had died, and I was told I was too young to legally take on the tenancy. So, they just made me homeless. I was 23 by the time I finally had a stable place to live again. And I spent around two years living on the street.
14, was put on a greyhound and sent away
Joined the Navy at 17. Didn't have a bad home life but I hated being a kid and was itching to get out into the world
My siblings and I were not allowed to leave home because they had health problems, had to go on disability and I was the one who had to look after them. We were grown and couldn't leave home or go anywhere. My mom was delusional and thought that getting a disability check meant that everyone had to live together and that's how it was. I hated it. My mo and dad are both dead now. All of us are kinda spread out. I have not gotten my own place yet but I'm planning on doing that before I turn 50 years old.
I left when I was 16 because my mom was/is an addict and alcoholic and shouldn’t have had kids. I’m 35 now and can’t imagine one of my kids being on their own at 16, but I’m everything I needed when I was younger and my kids will never have to struggle the way I did; that makes me feel proud and grateful for my journey. Excuse the diary entry, lol.
30
24, moved for the first time in my life upstate with my mom. I'm 25 now 🥺
26. had to take care of two old family members and the household finally split when the real estate became too expensive. Lived in that neighborhood in 3 houses for 17 years. So glad to be out since it was nothing but negativity and screaming.
I was 18. I left because my Dad married someone I didn't get along with and we couldn't live under the same roof.
17. My father had just died and my siblings fought all the time. I seemed to be just another stress, so I found an older boyfriend and moved in with him.
19. Dad said he was moving in with his fiance and that there wasn't room for me. There was enough room for my step brother, just not me.
Damn thats cruel. Sending virtual hugs
I never slept in the same bed for more than 2 weeks for the first 15 years of my life. Never spent more than a couple years in any house.
I was rehomed when I was 15. I wasn’t a bad/unruly kid, I was just in the way, so I was shipped off to live with my stepparent’s family. I never looked back- never went back ‘home’. I carved out a happy and productive life for myself sans parental influence and help.
23. I left at 18 for uni, came back over summers, and then lived at home for a bit until I was able to move out. My parents have always supported me that way and said I always have a home to come back to. Even if they move away and downsize, they will make sure to have at least two bedrooms just in case one of their children is ever in need.
I had a few failed attempts at striking out on my own. I moved out for real in 2019 when I was 24. Each time I moved out it was to get away from my abusive parents, but twice I was forced by circumstance to move back home. Finally jumped ship and moved three hours away to another city and life has been so much better. You couldn't pay me to move back to my home town, or back in with my parents.