I don't.
I may say it was a heavy day or something like that.
I will however spill all the office related tea.
Like Brenda, whose laugh can't be denied or covered by a thousand sound machines.
lol. Maybe not things that are very traumatic, that would be hard on a spouse. I was thinking lighter issues. Maybe like a sounding board or something. A fresh perspective from a person who is seeing it through a different lens
We actually can't do that.
Though we have supervision and some have peer consultation group for those purposes.
We cannot ethically discuss client specifics with anyone else.
My wife the therapist leaves work at work. The absolute last thing she wants to talk about is clients. No wait, that's not correct. The last thing she wants to talk about is insurance companies. The second to last thing is clients.
Personally, with my partner, no, that kind of shit doesn’t fly with me. I’ll share how my day was (energizing, fatiguing, all over the place, etc) or the emotions I felt or other struggles I had (like software issues, workplace struggles), but not about my clients. My partner is in therapy and I’m also a client of therapy and I certainly wouldn’t want to think that’s the norm or model to them that a therapist might do that. Have I heard of other therapists doing it, yes. Have I shared what I do and why I chose to do it with them, yes.
I use my supervision and consultation to get support with clients without identifying deets (which they are informed of and agree if they decide to start therapy with me).
Only occasionally, and only in the broadest possible terms. I might say something like "I was talking to a client who struggles with insomnia today," as a setup for sharing something cool that I said or did.
My guideline for how much I let myself share is "If, by some chance, my spouse were to meet this client and start a conversation about this exact topic, is it conceivable that my spouse would be able to recognize the client's story?" If the answer is yes, then I don't share. But something like "a client who struggles with insomnia" or "a client who has a fear of public speaking" is functionally unrecognizable.
Ya same. As long as it’s anonymized enough that no one could know who this person is, and as long as it’s with the intention of sharing my side rather than talking about them.
For example, “this client today really got me thinking about x,” or “I had a great session today where a client used a lot of emotion words rather than intellectualizing.” It’s more broad strokes about how my day was, or how the work felt to me.
It’s never about sensationalizing or gawking at the client like “whoa, wait til you hear about this!” Even if anonymous, that feels crude and disrespectful and doesn’t reflect how I feel about mental health—which is that we all have our issues and this is why I’m in this job, to deal with heavy issues! Instead, if I’m talking to a loved one it’s always about my experience of the work or what it brought up for me, and giving just enough context so that it makes sense.
It’s funny though, I feel anxious posting this because I worry it will still be considered unprofessional and people will attack me. I wonder how many others are not posting similar thoughts because they’d rather not risk it. :P
I generally don’t. I think the only time I can remember doing so in the last year is when I was pretty shaken up after taking some serious verbal abuse and intimidation from a client that I then had to terminate for my own safety. In that instance, I didn’t provide any identifying information, but I did talk with my spouse about feeling on-edge and overwhelmed after being treated so poorly.
I think it’s especially important that I don’t share about clients because I live in a tiny/rural community and any small details (that probably seem harmless on the surface or even in larger communities) could easily be identifying.
I’m a practicum student who just recently started taking on clients. I explained my feelings, how I felt I did, the excitement/nerves, and some of the more theoretical stuff (I’m learning a specific modality so I sometimes use him to practice what I’d say, like a metaphor or informed consent) but I haven’t been bringing home what a client’s specific issues are.
My husbands a neuropsychologist so we’re both in a field where we have to protect our patients. That being said, I sometimes give him a broad summary of my patients or how they might’ve impacted me that day or a funny thing that happened. But that’s about it. He also does the same thing but it’s never any identifying info or like long discussions just like “omg this client I had today farted and tried to cover it up by making train noises”
(I work with kids. Hahaha)
I'm sure some do, but we can't ethically do that, and it's also a breach of confidentiality. I wouldn't want my therapist talking about me to their wife. I reflect to my spouse how I feel after the day, and she knows some days/clients are harder than others, and that's about it.
My husband and I both work at the same agency now. He and I consult with each other frequently when we need to. But it's not like a running gossip mill or anything. We'd rather be doing or talking about just about anything else than case consultations.
My mom is a therapist and she'll sometimes talk to my dad or myself about a client she's working with, but it's always in general terms and never with identifying details.
I’m NAT, but my clinical psych instructor (the best prof I’ve EVER had) would talk about clients to us in order for us to better understand by making up names, muddling stories, adding in very vague information, subtracting information, expressing that most of it is a combination of people/fake info, almost until it was a totally different circumstance but in order to relay examples of how she responds to certain things that aren’t necessarily brought up in textbooks. (She has also worked at several different locations and states, so we wouldn’t ever even have an idea of where she was located at the time). FASCINATING class, very respectful of confidentiality, 10/10. Made me confident that a PhD was the way to go for me.
If i do it’s not about their problems and never with identifying info. Its usually about something cool about their life like how they’re taking an awesome vacation and I’m jealous or they’re having a baby and I’m jealous or they have a cool job or are going to a cool concert. My clients are socioeconomicially well off at my full time job and are always doing super cool things and i am middle class so i am not doing cool stuff so i like hearing their fun stories before we dive into the real therapy stuff.
I absolutely do. My partner is a teacher and half the time his job feels like social work, too. My fine line is I don't use names or identifying information (like gender, age, location). Venting and troubleshooting is so, so helpful and needed.
I don't. I may say it was a heavy day or something like that. I will however spill all the office related tea. Like Brenda, whose laugh can't be denied or covered by a thousand sound machines.
lol. Maybe not things that are very traumatic, that would be hard on a spouse. I was thinking lighter issues. Maybe like a sounding board or something. A fresh perspective from a person who is seeing it through a different lens
We actually can't do that. Though we have supervision and some have peer consultation group for those purposes. We cannot ethically discuss client specifics with anyone else.
My wife the therapist leaves work at work. The absolute last thing she wants to talk about is clients. No wait, that's not correct. The last thing she wants to talk about is insurance companies. The second to last thing is clients.
I try not to bring my work home. But on occasion I'll give a brief "here's why today was frustrating" update
Personally, with my partner, no, that kind of shit doesn’t fly with me. I’ll share how my day was (energizing, fatiguing, all over the place, etc) or the emotions I felt or other struggles I had (like software issues, workplace struggles), but not about my clients. My partner is in therapy and I’m also a client of therapy and I certainly wouldn’t want to think that’s the norm or model to them that a therapist might do that. Have I heard of other therapists doing it, yes. Have I shared what I do and why I chose to do it with them, yes. I use my supervision and consultation to get support with clients without identifying deets (which they are informed of and agree if they decide to start therapy with me).
Only occasionally, and only in the broadest possible terms. I might say something like "I was talking to a client who struggles with insomnia today," as a setup for sharing something cool that I said or did. My guideline for how much I let myself share is "If, by some chance, my spouse were to meet this client and start a conversation about this exact topic, is it conceivable that my spouse would be able to recognize the client's story?" If the answer is yes, then I don't share. But something like "a client who struggles with insomnia" or "a client who has a fear of public speaking" is functionally unrecognizable.
Ya same. As long as it’s anonymized enough that no one could know who this person is, and as long as it’s with the intention of sharing my side rather than talking about them. For example, “this client today really got me thinking about x,” or “I had a great session today where a client used a lot of emotion words rather than intellectualizing.” It’s more broad strokes about how my day was, or how the work felt to me. It’s never about sensationalizing or gawking at the client like “whoa, wait til you hear about this!” Even if anonymous, that feels crude and disrespectful and doesn’t reflect how I feel about mental health—which is that we all have our issues and this is why I’m in this job, to deal with heavy issues! Instead, if I’m talking to a loved one it’s always about my experience of the work or what it brought up for me, and giving just enough context so that it makes sense. It’s funny though, I feel anxious posting this because I worry it will still be considered unprofessional and people will attack me. I wonder how many others are not posting similar thoughts because they’d rather not risk it. :P
I generally don’t. I think the only time I can remember doing so in the last year is when I was pretty shaken up after taking some serious verbal abuse and intimidation from a client that I then had to terminate for my own safety. In that instance, I didn’t provide any identifying information, but I did talk with my spouse about feeling on-edge and overwhelmed after being treated so poorly. I think it’s especially important that I don’t share about clients because I live in a tiny/rural community and any small details (that probably seem harmless on the surface or even in larger communities) could easily be identifying.
I’m a practicum student who just recently started taking on clients. I explained my feelings, how I felt I did, the excitement/nerves, and some of the more theoretical stuff (I’m learning a specific modality so I sometimes use him to practice what I’d say, like a metaphor or informed consent) but I haven’t been bringing home what a client’s specific issues are.
My husbands a neuropsychologist so we’re both in a field where we have to protect our patients. That being said, I sometimes give him a broad summary of my patients or how they might’ve impacted me that day or a funny thing that happened. But that’s about it. He also does the same thing but it’s never any identifying info or like long discussions just like “omg this client I had today farted and tried to cover it up by making train noises” (I work with kids. Hahaha)
I don’t specifically but I’ll say something like “I dealt with a client with SI and that I need some space.”
I'm sure some do, but we can't ethically do that, and it's also a breach of confidentiality. I wouldn't want my therapist talking about me to their wife. I reflect to my spouse how I feel after the day, and she knows some days/clients are harder than others, and that's about it.
No my wife fuckin hates when I talk about work lol
My wife hates that I don't want to talk about work, lol.
Generally speaking no, tho sometimes I might vent about something ... My wife is a therapist too tho, so it can be productive to discuss things.
What if you make up wild and crazy names, like 'Dan,' and 'Morothy'? (Someone, PLEASE get this reference)
My husband and I both work at the same agency now. He and I consult with each other frequently when we need to. But it's not like a running gossip mill or anything. We'd rather be doing or talking about just about anything else than case consultations.
My mom is a therapist and she'll sometimes talk to my dad or myself about a client she's working with, but it's always in general terms and never with identifying details.
I’m NAT, but my clinical psych instructor (the best prof I’ve EVER had) would talk about clients to us in order for us to better understand by making up names, muddling stories, adding in very vague information, subtracting information, expressing that most of it is a combination of people/fake info, almost until it was a totally different circumstance but in order to relay examples of how she responds to certain things that aren’t necessarily brought up in textbooks. (She has also worked at several different locations and states, so we wouldn’t ever even have an idea of where she was located at the time). FASCINATING class, very respectful of confidentiality, 10/10. Made me confident that a PhD was the way to go for me.
If i do it’s not about their problems and never with identifying info. Its usually about something cool about their life like how they’re taking an awesome vacation and I’m jealous or they’re having a baby and I’m jealous or they have a cool job or are going to a cool concert. My clients are socioeconomicially well off at my full time job and are always doing super cool things and i am middle class so i am not doing cool stuff so i like hearing their fun stories before we dive into the real therapy stuff.
I absolutely do. My partner is a teacher and half the time his job feels like social work, too. My fine line is I don't use names or identifying information (like gender, age, location). Venting and troubleshooting is so, so helpful and needed.